S12.E08: If You Can't Take the Heat, Get Out of the Russian Bath House

[Hangin Out]

Geeze, they filmed in the fall before Christmas.  It’s May now and we’re in this virus.  I wonder how she is faring without John and her drinking problem.  Maybe her daughter is living with her in the city;  she can’t live in Bluestone as it’s probably under construction.  Anything on Page 6 in the Post?

 

 

[CharlizeCat]

That's OK. She probably does take two "afternoon naps" every day! 

[sasha206]

14 hours ago, Silver Bells said:

You have to be alert, informed and no afternoon naps in the afternoon to show N.Y. Real Estate.  Apparently, this job at Bravo is enough for her.  She can drink all day long, take a nap and still get paid well when they film.  Besides, I read her net worth was in the millions.  Maybe she’ll get an old cocker like AnnA Nicole Smith got.  I repeated “afternoon” twice up there.  Can’t fix it.

 

You know what though, a net worth in the "millions" really isn't all that much in NYC, especially if much of it is tied into real estate.  She could go through that pretty quickly if she's has 2 homes to maintain. Then she's got a ton of upkeep a 11,000 square foot 100 year-old mansion on 18 acres.

I don't know what she makes from RHONY, but that money isn't going to last forever either.   She's 55. It's hard to imagine she's got 5 years worth of RHONY money -- she's aging out.

So if that's her only source of income and she's living the high life, I wouldn't rest on that.  Depending on her investments, she could've lost a shitload with COVID. 

I suspect she'll dump BSM soon.  That's why she's going through all the emotions now.  She knows she needs to sell it.

 

 

[Mar]

14 hours ago, Silver Bells said:

Geeze, they filmed in the fall before Christmas.  It’s May now and we’re in this virus.  I wonder how she is faring without John and her drinking problem.  Maybe her daughter is living with her in the city;  she can’t live in Bluestone as it’s probably under construction.  Anything on Page 6 in the Post?

 

 

I follow her on Instagram so I am up-to-date on her situation. The work on Bluestone has been finished and in fact it was featured in the magazine Architectural Digest. She has been self quarantined at Bluestone with a male friend who is gay. Her daughter was with her for a while but hasn’t appeared recently in her postings, So I am assuming she is no longer there.

[sadie]

52 minutes ago, sasha206 said:

You know what though, a net worth in the "millions" really isn't all that much in NYC, especially if much of it is tied into real estate.  She could go through that pretty quickly if she's has 2 homes to maintain. Then she's got a ton of upkeep a 11,000 square foot 100 year-old mansion on 18 acres.

 

Agreed. Let’s say she has $5M in investments producing 10% a year (unlikely) that’s still only $500k annually unless your dipping into principal. Now in nowhere North Dakota that sounds like a lot of money, in NYC not so much. I bet all the publicity of BSM is in anticipation of putting it on the market and being able to say “As featured in Architectural Digest”. 

[biakbiak]

4 minutes ago, sadie said:

bet all the publicity of BSM is in anticipation of putting it on the market and being able to say “As featured in Architectural Digest”. 

It happens so frequently with actual famous people that people start speculating immediately when a house is featured that they’re selling, if it’s a couple people also start speculating about divorce. 

Edited May 26, 2020 by biakbiak

[Happy Camper]

3 hours ago, Mar said:

Her daughter was with her for a while but hasn’t appeared recently in her postings, So I am assuming she is no longer there.

Gee, I wonder why?

[65mickey]

4 hours ago, sadie said:

Agreed. Let’s say she has $5M in investments producing 10% a year (unlikely) that’s still only $500k annually unless your dipping into principal. Now in nowhere North Dakota that sounds like a lot of money, in NYC not so much. I bet all the publicity of BSM is in anticipation of putting it on the market and being able to say “As featured in Architectural Digest”. 

I wonder what the taxes are on BSM? Must be pretty steep not to mention heating and cooling expenses and landscape costs. I would think you would have to be more than just well off to afford this.  Doesn't she still own 2 apartments in NYC or is she renting her new apartment? I wonder the same thing about how Sonja affords the taxes on the townhouse. they must be printing money in the basement.

[b2H]

On 5/24/2020 at 8:34 AM, Chicklet said:

How does Ramona just shrug these attacks off?

She considers the source and is well aware of her truth and reality.

Ergo, it doesn’t matter what Dorinda says.  If Ramona is comfortable where she is, fine - none of Dorinda’s business or concern.  Can easily be ignored as irrelevant.

[eleanorofaquitaine]

5 hours ago, 65mickey said:

I wonder what the taxes are on BSM? Must be pretty steep not to mention heating and cooling expenses and landscape costs. I would think you would have to be more than just well off to afford this.  Doesn't she still own 2 apartments in NYC or is she renting her new apartment? I wonder the same thing about how Sonja affords the taxes on the townhouse. they must be printing money in the basement.

Zillow says that the property taxes for it for 2019 was around $50,000. Interestingly, Zillow also notes that it was listed for sale in 2011 and then removed a few months later.

https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/25-W-Sheffield-Rd-Great-Barrington-MA-01230/63437244_zpid/

 

 

 

[SuprSuprElevated]

You know, property owning has it's benefits, and if she lists this as her primary residence, there are tax advantages and deductions etc., but I cannot imagine, no matter how hard I try, to grasp the upside of padding around in a 10,000 sqft home, as a single person.  

In my 30's and 40's I enjoyed entertaining, though rarely for overnight guests, but as a person close in age to Dorinda, I am o.v.e.r all the fuss and bother associated with it now.  The $50k annual taxes are only the start of the financial burden of keeping up a property like that.  The insurance is probably close in $$ to the taxes, and just the maintenance of the grounds would be very daunting.  We all know that she appears to be hamstrung by the memories of Richard <yawn>, but if I were her daughter, I would have a hard time NOT constantly badgering her to offload that albatross, turn it into cash, and move on.

[mostlylurking]

The jealousy dripping off these women regarding Tinsley is pathetic. She was born into money. Even if she didn’t work a day in her life, which doesn’t seem to be the case, who gives a shit??  She was born into that privilege.  It’s nothing to be proud, embarrassed, or ashamed of.  It just is.  She should just own it. She got a college degree, worked at various enterprises, and had done a lot of charity work. That’s more than a lot of rich snobs.  Leah was right. Tinsley owes no one an explanation. Especially not Dorinda, she of the spittle on her lip and drunken slurring. No class whatsoever. She’s beneath Tinsley. 

Dorinda and Lu were both obnoxious about going downtown but I have to say that bath house did look dirty and gross. I’m a poor and I wouldn’t want to go there. Looked like an indoor pool at a moldy motel. 
 

Sonja has gained weight.  It’s just a fact. I still like Ramona. She can cut you, but she also knows how to apologize, self deprecate and honestly most of the time she’s right. 

Edited May 27, 2020 by mostlylurking

[Hiyo]

Quote

Let’s say she has $5M in investments producing 10% a year (unlikely) that’s still only $500k annually unless your dipping into principal

Unless she keeps it all in savings and just lives off the monthly interest, she could be earning twice that...

Quote

Dorinda and Lu were both obnoxious about going downtown but I have to say that bath house did look dirty and gross.

I have a feeling they could go somewhere really nice downtown and still bitch and moan about it. Heck didn't they go to a pizza place in Brooklyn a few seasons ago (where Dorinda gave us the CLIP! moment) and some of the acted like they were going to a foreign country...

[sasha206]

7 hours ago, eleanorofaquitaine said:

Zillow says that the property taxes for it for 2019 was around $50,000. Interestingly, Zillow also notes that it was listed for sale in 2011 and then removed a few months later.

https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/25-W-Sheffield-Rd-Great-Barrington-MA-01230/63437244_zpid/

 

 

 

What's interesting to me is the photos are only of the outside and of the kitchen and then stairs.  There are no photos of the bedrooms, living areas, bathrooms.  My guess is when it was on the market, the realtor decided not to post photos of fish room and Dorinda's tacky AF decor.  

I would also bet that people in the market for a house of that price don't want to have to undo all of Dorinda's bad taste.  I mean look at this ceiling!  

I can also imagine Dorinda, despite supposedly being a realtor, arguing with the listing agent on repainting and having someone stage the house.  And I can also picture her not listening to the agent's pricing suggestions. Therefore it didn't sell in 2011 because others don't find it as captivating as Dorinda does.  

 

Edited May 27, 2020 by sasha206

[sasha206]

I mean, it looks like Home Goods (a store I do love) took a giant dump on this house.  Staging a house is really important to a home sale, so I can't imagine sophisticated NYers looking past her tackiness to have a second home in the Berkshires.

[65mickey]

• 18 hours ago, sadie said:

  •  

[65mickey]

Just now, 65mickey said:

•   

 I find it interesting that Dorinda listed BSM for sale in 9/ 2011. Richard died in 11/2011. I wonder if he was trying to get her to sell it knowing that she might not have the funds to hold on to this. Or if both of their names were on the deed and she didn't want it to become part of his estate. Just seems odd that she would put it on the market 2 months before he died.  She has referred to it as a legacy that she cherishes. 

[RedDelicious]

48 minutes ago, sasha206 said:

 I would also bet that people in the market for a house of that price don't want to have to undo all of Dorinda's bad taste.  I mean look at this ceiling!  

 

 

They are colors historically appropriate to the gilded age and mimic the stained glass at Ca d’Zan in Sarasota, Florida. 

[sasha206]

2 minutes ago, RedDelicious said:

They are colors historically appropriate to the gilded age and mimic the stained glass at Ca d’Zan in Sarasota, Florida. 

Well, that's interesting and something I hadn't considered.  

But even if historically accurate, does the house show well with the rest of her tackiness?  The ceiling might be beautiful in a house that didn't have the decor she does and fishes on a wall.

11 minutes ago, 65mickey said:

 I find it interesting that Dorinda listed BSM for sale in 9/ 2011. Richard died in 11/2011. I wonder if he was trying to get her to sell it knowing that she might not have the funds to hold on to this. Or if both of their names were on the deed and she didn't want it to become part of his estate. Just seems odd that she would put it on the market 2 months before he died.  She has referred to it as a legacy that she cherishes. 

Interesting on the timing.    

I wonder if he thought the home would be too much upkeep for Dorinda and he wanted to sell it so she wouldn't be stuck with it?  The guy was in finance and probably knew it was a terrible idea for her to hold onto the home when he was dead.

[RedDelicious]

The fish room was destroyed in the flood and not returned to its original design. 

[sasha206]

4 minutes ago, RedDelicious said:

The fish room was destroyed in the flood and not returned to its original design. 

Ah thanks.

I take it you like her decor?  I mean, I understand now that she's trying to represent the era the home was built.  But I still don't like her choices.  

Edited May 27, 2020 by sasha206

[sadie]

1 hour ago, Hiyo said:

Unless she keeps it all in savings and just lives off the monthly interest, she could be earning twice that...

I have a feeling they could go somewhere really nice downtown and still bitch and moan about it. Heck didn't they go to a pizza place in Brooklyn a few seasons ago (where Dorinda gave us the CLIP! moment) and some of the acted like they were going to a foreign country...

What kind of savings account yields better than 10%? Even a money market On $5M at 2% would only pay $100k annual? Maybe my math is messed up? 

[RedDelicious]

1 hour ago, sasha206 said:

Ah thanks.

I take it you like her decor?  I mean, I understand now that she's trying to represent the era the home was built.  But I still don't like her choices.  

Not in its entirety, but for the most part I like what she did. The bold color choices (with the exception of the red bedroom) are predominantly in the furnishings, which are easy to change. They aren't necessarily choices I would have made for myself, but I like that BSM is a massive departure from the white/gray/black aesthetic that has been trending for the last few years. I like color and personality and choices that pique interest, as opposed to the mass market interpretations of the Property Brothers, Chip/Joanna and all the other modern farm housers. I did not care for the fish room, and I think they were Richard's fish, but I would not have made a stink about receiving it as my room assignment like Luann 😉 

[sasha206]

34 minutes ago, RedDelicious said:

Not in its entirety, but for the most part I like what she did. The bold color choices (with the exception of the red bedroom) are predominantly in the furnishings, which are easy to change. They aren't necessarily choices I would have made for myself, but I like that BSM is a massive departure from the white/gray/black aesthetic that has been trending for the last few years. I like color and personality and choices that pique interest, as opposed to the mass market interpretations of the Property Brothers, Chip/Joanna and all the other modern farm housers. I did not care for the fish room, and I think they were Richard's fish, but I would not have made a stink about receiving it as my room assignment like Luann 😉 

Very good point!  I keep forgetting that there are people that appreciate that a home is decorated to match the history and style of the house.  I was not looking at her choices through the historical context lens.  And clearly, I didn't read the Architectural Design article!

Edited May 27, 2020 by sasha206

[Hiyo]

Quote

What kind of savings account yields better than 10%? Even a money market On $5M at 2% would only pay $100k annual? Maybe my math is messed up? 

Sorry, was having a brain fart and was thinking of something else. Carry on.

[UsernameFatigue]

3 hours ago, 65mickey said:

 I find it interesting that Dorinda listed BSM for sale in 9/ 2011. Richard died in 11/2011. I wonder if he was trying to get her to sell it knowing that she might not have the funds to hold on to this. Or if both of their names were on the deed and she didn't want it to become part of his estate. Just seems odd that she would put it on the market 2 months before he died.  She has referred to it as a legacy that she cherishes. 

That is very interesting that BSM was for sale two months before Richard died. I thought that his illness was quite brief when he died of liver failure. Has it ever been disclosed how long he was sick before he passed? Dorinda has always said that Richard bought BSM for her as a wedding present, so I assume it was either in her name or joint with Richard. Where I live, if there are two names on the deed and one person dies the property automatically goes to the surviving person, not into the estate. Are the laws different in NY? In any case very interesting that BSM was for sale when it was. 

[65mickey]

Richard died on 11-16-11 and the listing was removed 11-24-11. Dorinda and Richard were married 10-15 2005 and the house was purchased in May 2005. I guess it depended on how the deed was worded as to whether Dorinda inherited the house or if he put it entirely in her name. I just find it curious that this was going on when he was ill and dying and a few days after his death the listing was removed. 

[The Ringo Kidd]

Something fishy was going on.

Thats why it was commemorated in the fish room.

[sasha206]

35 minutes ago, 65mickey said:

Richard died on 11-16-11 and the listing was removed 11-24-11. Dorinda and Richard were married 10-15 2005 and the house was purchased in May 2005. I guess it depended on how the deed was worded as to whether Dorinda inherited the house or if he put it entirely in her name. I just find it curious that this was going on when he was ill and dying and a few days after his death the listing was removed. 

That makes me think that Richard wanted it to go on the market b/c he felt Dorinda wouldn't be able to handle the house on her own after his death?  He was a financial guy and must've known that his wealth would get distributed to his children in addition to Dorinda and w/o his earnings, he knew the upkeep of the house would be too much for her?

It sounds like his death may have been fairly quick -- maybe he fell ill, diagnosed with liver failure then died shortly after the diagnosis?  Like maybe when he found out he convinced Dorinda to sell.  He died and the house was too much of sentimental value to Dorinda so she took it off the market?

Also, this is probably not a good thing to speculate, but liver failure...alcholics have liver issues.

[UsernameFatigue]

I always thought that Richard's death was fairly sudden - in that he did not know two months before he died that his death was imminent. Which makes the fact that BSM was for sale very interesting indeed. 

So it sounds like from an above posting that Dorinda's name on the deed along with Richard's would not guarantee that the house would go to Dorinda? Does that differ from state to state? As far as I know in Canada, and with any property I have owned, joint ownership means the surviving person inherits. 

Does anyone else find it ironic that the fish room did not survive due to a flood? 

Edited May 27, 2020 by UsernameFatigue

[AryasMum]

On 5/22/2020 at 8:10 AM, bkathi said:

I have a small bedroom and don't use a headboard - it takes up too much space.  Maybe that's why Leah chose not to as well.  Her daughter's bedroom is lovely.

Leah is pretty generous giving her daughter the master, particularly because her daughter is only there 50% of the time. 

[biakbiak]

3 minutes ago, AryasMum said:

Leah is pretty generous giving her daughter the master, particularly because her daughter is only there 50% of the time. 

The way I took it is that she sleeps in the master when her daughter isn’t there, especially because she said all the closets in the master were hers.

[AryasMum]

On 5/22/2020 at 8:32 AM, jaybird2 said:

i've read there was/is a high rate of std's in fla among the seniors.  also, once a man looses his wife there are 10 women bringing him casseroles.    i guess that's where ickie (oc) gets her casserole fixation.

At one point, seniors were the group with the fastest growing HIV/AIDS population. 

On 5/22/2020 at 10:29 AM, Ms Blue Jay said:

And she also goes as low as she can possibly go.  It's like a Scorched-Earth mentality.

I had to look up the phrase because I forgot it:

A scorched-earth policy is a military strategy that aims to destroy anything that might be useful to the enemy when retreating from a position. Any assets that could be used by the enemy may be targeted, which usually includes obvious weapons, transport vehicles, communication sites, and industrial resources.

Scorched earth - Wikipedia

And crops, farm animals, etc. In the movie Atonement, they show WWII British soldiers fleeing from the Nazis. All their horses were lined up, and shot in the head one after another. They wouldn’t leave them behind for the Germans.  
 

And while I’m wallowing in this horror, Americans are known to have abandoned military dogs when withdrawing. They’re left to fend for themselves, and were often murdered by our enemies in retaliation. 

[eleanorofaquitaine]

9 hours ago, SuprSuprElevated said:

You know, property owning has it's benefits, and if she lists this as her primary residence, there are tax advantages and deductions etc., but I cannot imagine, no matter how hard I try, to grasp the upside of padding around in a 10,000 sqft home, as a single person.  

In my 30's and 40's I enjoyed entertaining, though rarely for overnight guests, but as a person close in age to Dorinda, I am o.v.e.r all the fuss and bother associated with it now.  The $50k annual taxes are only the start of the financial burden of keeping up a property like that.  The insurance is probably close in $$ to the taxes, and just the maintenance of the grounds would be very daunting.  We all know that she appears to be hamstrung by the memories of Richard <yawn>, but if I were her daughter, I would have a hard time NOT constantly badgering her to offload that albatross, turn it into cash, and move on.

Oh sure. I wasn't saying that the taxes are the only expense on that property - I imagine upkeep on it is prohibitively expensive. In general, winters in Massachusetts are no joke, and they are worse in a place like the Berkshires than they are even in Boston. That has to contribute to the expense.

My sense is that Dorinda is clinging to Bluestone Manor in the same way she is clinging to Richard's memory - because it makes her feel more important than she actually is.  She would be smarter to offload it and buy a condo or something in the Berkshires, if having a place there is so important to her. People can scoff at the small size of Lu's home upstate, but if it is just you, it makes a lot more sense that a gigantic mansion. 

[sasha206]

2 hours ago, biakbiak said:

The way I took it is that she sleeps in the master when her daughter isn’t there, especially because she said all the closets in the master were hers.

Probably so.

One thing that struck me:  You know who I don't think would give up their master for their kid even part of the time?  The woman who tuned her up at Leah's apartment:  Luann.

3 hours ago, UsernameFatigue said:

I always thought that Richard's death was fairly sudden - in that he did not know two months before he died that his death was imminent. Which makes the fact that BSM was for sale very interesting indeed. 

So it sounds like from an above posting that Dorinda's name on the deed along with Richard's would not guarantee that the house would go to Dorinda? Does that differ from state to state? As far as I know in Canada, and with any property I have owned, joint ownership means the surviving person inherits. 

Does anyone else find it ironic that the fish room did not survive due to a flood? 

DIES LAUGHING!  

[Hangin Out]

On 5/23/2020 at 8:22 PM, sasha206 said:

Dorinda has a great apartment.  I feel like if she sold Blue Stone Manor, she'd be a lot happier and a lot richer.  It's an old mansion that requires a lot of upkeep.  I'm 52 and have a 4 bedroom house that is about 3500 sq feet and when my teenage daughter moves out, not sure I'd stay. BSM is cash drain on her.   Sell it, keep the NYC apartment.  AirBNB when you want to enjoy some land and a pool.  

Sounds reasonable, but I doubt she would sell.  The grandfather and great grandfather built the foundation or something, so to her, it’s something to keep in the family.  It does seem to be a drain on her tho and seems too big for her use.  Too many rooms for one person, and the inside looks like a museum.  Plus as one poster said, who wants to entertain at that age.  She should turn it into a bed n breakfast and go up there the weekends she wants.   Some people would like to go therefor a weekend just to look at her stuff.  Maybe it would be something for her to do and get her mind off all the nonsense.  A Bed & Breakfast in the Bezerkshires.

 

 

 

Edited May 27, 2020 by Silver Bells

[AryasMum]

On 5/23/2020 at 4:58 PM, tranquilidade said:

It sounded like she tormented her daughter too.

Dorinda tormented Hannah?  Where did that come from?

On 5/24/2020 at 7:41 PM, ChitChat said:

If I had that going for me, I'd take full advantage of it!!  I don't begrudge her anything.  She seems like a sweet person.  It's too bad that Dorinda ran her off.  

I thought Tins left to be with Scott. 

[sasha206]

2 hours ago, eleanorofaquitaine said:

Oh sure. I wasn't saying that the taxes are the only expense on that property - I imagine upkeep on it is prohibitively expensive. In general, winters in Massachusetts are no joke, and they are worse in a place like the Berkshires than they are even in Boston. That has to contribute to the expense.

My sense is that Dorinda is clinging to Bluestone Manor in the same way she is clinging to Richard's memory - because it makes her feel more important than she actually is.  She would be smarter to offload it and buy a condo or something in the Berkshires, if having a place there is so important to her. People can scoff at the small size of Lu's home upstate, but if it is just you, it makes a lot more sense that a gigantic mansion. 

That's a really interesting observation.  Maybe that is why she can't stop mentioning Richard and can't shake his memory.  There may have been some great love for this man she was married to for six years, but constantly talking about him is a reminder to all that she once rolled with political royalty and great men the likes of Desmond Tutu.  And therefore SHE was important once.

 

 

[AryasMum]

On 5/25/2020 at 2:23 PM, StatisticalOutlier said:

Well, that proves you weren't really paying attention that closely.  😄

 

Good point. 

Luann can be so obnoxious, but I still remember a scene where she and Carole were in a boat fishing, and I was shocked to realize that I would have liked to have been in that boat with them.  

 

I'm kind of looking forward to the bully exploding, though.

I'm afraid this is like the house hunter shows, with the manufactured storylines.  I always yell about how they're not necessary--just show us the houses!  But some TV channel in Los Angeles has a program that just shows houses, and I'm horrified to admit that it's boring.

 

In the video, she cited having a bar downstairs as a benefit.  Don't even have to go outside to drink.

But Tins also said it’s expensive, so she tries not to go so much. So she must abide by some sort of budget. 

[Anonysaurus]

28 minutes ago, sasha206 said:

One thing that struck me:  You know who I don't think would give up their master for their kid even part of the time?  The woman who tuned her up at Leah's apartment:  Luann.

That's for dang sure. Luann's kids had to sue her for the money from their own house sale . . . 

[sasha206]

36 minutes ago, Anonysaurus said:

That's for dang sure. Luann's kids had to sue her for the money from their own house sale . . . 

Ha, that's right!  I forgot about that!

[Hangin Out]

1 hour ago, sasha206 said:

That's a really interesting observation.  Maybe that is why she can't stop mentioning Richard and can't shake his memory.  There may have been some great love for this man she was married to for six years, but constantly talking about him is a reminder to all that she once rolled with political royalty and great men the likes of Desmond Tutu.  And therefore SHE was important once.

 

   Six years,  I know couples that have been married 30, 40 and 50 yrs when their spouses died.  They didn’t keep carrying on endlessly like Dorinda.  She is morning who he was and knew, especially who SHE knew because of him.  I’m surprised she didn’t have a full on breakdown when she went to see the Brownstone.  I’m wondering if his children liked her and are still seeing her.

[mostlylurking]

2 hours ago, AryasMum said:

2 hours ago, AryasMum said:

But Tins also said it’s expensive, so she tries not to go so much. So she must abide by some sort of budget. 

Yeah but I don’t think Tinsley’s version of expensive or budget is anywhere near how a normal middle class person would classify those things.  I said this in a previous episode post but dear lord I would love to be put on Tinsleys budget. It would be rough, but I think I could muddle through somehow 😉

Edited May 28, 2020 by mostlylurking

[Anne Thrax]

On 5/21/2020 at 6:45 PM, LibertarianSlut said:

Leah is right that Tinsley should respond more strongly to Dorinda, and Luann is right that she shouldn’t be screeching.  When Tinsley felt the need to stand up at the table at the sidewalk cafe with just Leah and Luann, I started thinking this isn’t going to bode well.  

Tinsley needs to find a style.  She is not going to be able to have the same exact style of confrontation as Luann or Leah, but she needs to find a way to have a way to be assertive with other adult woman.  I don’t care about Dorinda.  She can fall off the face of the earth tomorrow.  There will always be a “Dorinda” in Tinsley’s life if she doesn’t learn this skill.  Does she want Dale to still boss her around in her fifties?  Because Dale is absolutely not going to change.  Tinsley has to do this if she wants things to be different.  

Tinsley should be in serious therapy, because she could stand to gain a lot from it.  The rest seem a little too set in their ways or pickled in the brain to be affected by someone’s advice.  And Dorinda and that yes-man?  No words.  All I learned from that exchange was that Richard was not a good looking man.  

So when Sonja was saying that she realized that she couldn’t be drunk in public at the orchard, but she could be drunk on a girls’ trip and usually they would be on a girls’ trip, I realized this is right around the time of the season that they would have gone to Blue Stone Manor, except it fell apart and Dorinda couldn’t afford to keep it up.  So...Sonja thinks her behavior at BSM was ok in the past?  What part?  Raising and lowering Ramona’s 17 year old dog over her head repeatedly?  Or threatening Barbara with a beating if she made out with Sonja’s girlfriend, Bethenny?

Maybe Dorinda really doesn’t know who Mao Zhedong was.  She compared the spa to a “Hamas,” which is a terrorist group.  What was this globe-trotting Richard even doing with her?  

I was thinking the same thing when Dorinda slurred how the place was called "a hamas".  Honestly, I believe it's the brain damage.  It's almost as if she slurs now even when she's not hammered.  

[Stats Queen]

5 minutes ago, Anne Thrax said:

I was thinking the same thing when Dorinda slurred how the place was called "a hamas".  Honestly, I believe it's the brain damage.  It's almost as if she slurs now even when she's not hammered.  

I agree, but then again I am not sure when she is not hammered.

[sasha206]

1 hour ago, Silver Bells said:

2 hours ago, sasha206 said:

 

  Six years,  I know couples that have been married 30, 40 and 50 yrs when their spouses died.  They didn’t keep carrying on endlessly like Dorinda.  She is morning who he was and knew, especially who SHE knew because of him.  I’m surprised she didn’t have a full on breakdown when she went to see the Brownstone.  I’m wondering if his children liked her and are still seeing her.

Right?  I was married to my husband 22 years before he died.  He was a GREAT guy.  My daughter doesn't even carry on as much as Dorinda does about her husband.

I'm sure she genuinely loved him, but I also think what she can't let go of and can't deal with is the loss of the lifestyle.

[Stats Queen]

6 minutes ago, sasha206 said:

Right?  I was married to my husband 22 years before he died.  He was a GREAT guy.  My daughter doesn't even carry on as much as Dorinda does about her husband.

I'm sure she genuinely loved him, but I also think what she can't let go of and can't deal with is the loss of the lifestyle.

My brother died unexpectedly at 59 and he and my sister-in-law had been married 39 years, my nephew just got married three weeks before my brother’s death and my niece was supposed to get married in April, then in June and now a tiny wedding in June. 
Two months after her husband died, my sister in law was diagnosed with stage 3 gallbladder cancer (she’s doing amazing). All the heart break, loss, and personal pain has been torture for her. But she’s still an amazing, positive person who still treats others with love. She is an amazing example of resilience, strength, and love, vs. Dorinda who is.... Dorinda.

[sasha206]

32 minutes ago, Stats Queen said:

My brother died unexpectedly at 59 and he and my sister-in-law had been married 39 years, my nephew just got married three weeks before my brother’s death and my niece was supposed to get married in April, then in June and now a tiny wedding in June. 
Two months after her husband died, my sister in law was diagnosed with stage 3 gallbladder cancer (she’s doing amazing). All the heart break, loss, and personal pain has been torture for her. But she’s still an amazing, positive person who still treats others with love. She is an amazing example of resilience, strength, and love, vs. Dorinda who is.... Dorinda.

I am so sorry about your brother!  There have been times where I have almost felt worse for my husband's siblings.  Your sister in law sounds like one amazing lady!  Hope she kicks cancer's ass!

[film noire]

 

15 hours ago, sasha206 said:

 I keep forgetting that there are people that appreciate that a home is decorated to match the history and style of the house.  I was not looking at her choices through the historical context lens. 

The renovation was period -  panelling,  light fixtures, kitchen cabinetry,  etc - but the decorating isn't period  (Dorinda calls it “Marilyn Monroe meets Frankenstein" - jesus, what did Marilyn ever do to you, Dorinda?  ; )

Mileage varies, but I don't like the decor.  It takes a really great eye to pull that off, imo  - mixing hyper-bold colours, different periods, powerful art, whimsical pieces - and still have it land as "This is just my thing". I've been spending  pandemic time roaming properties on you tube, playing "Would I?" ("Would I spend lockdown in this Scottish castle with a private lake, miles of roses, and full staff? Well, I GUESS I could FORCE MYSELF,  if I had to leave this railroad apartment I'm swanning around in - slowly going mad with mr film noire, the dog, and fucking mice that keep outwitting the friggin' "humane" traps - but perhaps a French chateau would suit me better? - CLICK!") And after weeks of peering through windows - from medieval to  post-modern -  I think Bluestone Manor looks like somebody desperately trying to be daring and outre and rule-breaking, instead of actually being daring and outre and rule-breaking, 

Edited May 28, 2020 by film noire

[SuprSuprElevated]

I have a couple of things in common with Dorinda, our age and the fact that we married men 14 yrs our senior.  I'm wondering if her concentrated angst over Sir Richard has to do with her age at the time she became widowed.  She was 46 or so, so very young to be a widow, and have her lifestyle sort of ripped from her.  Not her monetary life necessarily, but the circles they traveled in, the people they hung with etc.  He was likely the draw in that relationship, lol.

My life changed rather dramatically when I was in my 50's as well (I'm 60 now), my husband developed several illnesses which have made him all-but housebound, I'm unable to work so I can care for him and my mother, and so finances are stretched, and blah blah blah.  I've taken my turn at playing Bitter Betty on more than one occasion, though I'm getting less so with time.  She didn't really have time to adjust if his illness was short-lived and his death rather sudden.

Anyway, not certain she would have handled things any better if she had been a more traditionally-aged widow, but it could be a factor.