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S04.E08: Stranger In A Strange Land


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14 minutes ago, kendi said:

I had a big chuckle at Rosemarie laughing in a preview snippet, calling Ed a big baby because the electricity went out in the middle of the night. Most importantly, the little fan can't cool him so he really won't be able to sleep. Those brown-outs happen all the time. Again, got mega irritated with Ed mumbling, "What have I got myself into" or "What am I doing here?" Like she's pulling a fast one on him? She's poor! 

Plus his coworker warned him it’s hot and humid and Rose is out in the country.  But he blew it off. 
 

Is her town three hours from Manila?  If so, why was someone calling it a suburb?  

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9 minutes ago, Kangatush said:

The problem is that when EVERYONE tells her to take time and work on herself, she only does physical work, and never gets happy being with herself.

Ash can counsel Darcy when he moves to the US with Avery. We'll call the episode "Fix You" when they're all on "Happily Ever After?" 

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1 hour ago, Spike said:

Is her town three hours from Manila?  If so, why was someone calling it a suburb?  

Yes, her town is three hours away from downtown Manila but when you look at the map, the sprawling areas kind of run together. I recall Rose saying she’d never been to Manila. 

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(edited)
20 hours ago, iwasish said:

I wonder who paid for those nice straight white teeth?

I mean, the Philippines does have an oral health program, similar to our Medicaid, that provides dental care (including orthodontist services for those who are referred) for children and low-income adults. Oral health has been a huge problem in the past there, with almost 80% of the kids having gum disease and tooth decay by the time they're 12, so over the past 20 years they've really been pushing dental care and services. Basic services, like cleaning and whitening, are already cheaper there than here.

When I first saw Rose I thought she was wearing clip in veneers. When I was in the Peace Corps we worked hard to educate the community members about oral and physical health and we helped coordinate services. A big part of getting cell phones to the people was so they had access to internet research and the ability to communicate health needs There were oral surgeons and orthodontists back in the US who used to basically donate things like clip on veneers, partial dentures, mouthguards, etc and the local doctors would attempt to match them up. 

Of course, she could also just have naturally straight teeth and work hard to keep them clean and healthy.

Re: tattoos....

I consider the cost wuth a grain of salt when I see them on "poor" people. Mine, which would've been at least $200-300 in the US, was only $40 abroad. And don't  underestimate the desire to have one. People will get industrious and barter or trade for the ink and, if all else fails, there is always the kitchen "parlor." I know follks who had friends do theirs with regular needles and india ink just for the fun or practice *shudder* 

Edited by mamadrama
I always make a million typos on my tablet
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4 hours ago, KateHearts said:

He is a photographer (shown in his intro episode) and an interior designer, which he mentioned in the same episode. Is there anything else?

And speaking of Ed, his whole way of speaking to Rosemarie is just... creepy, in part because it's so parental.  "Take your robe off, please" sent true shivers down my spine. And when they woke up in the morning, his singsong "good morrrning... you look so pretty" sounded like a dad saying to his four year old, "time to get up for daycare!!"  Just ick. And he has expressed over-the-top emotions several times now: "I'm dying and I need air conditioning," and "there are exposed wires; I'm scared." C'mon Ed; your friend told you flat out what to expect. You really are surprised at the conditions there?

No, that's it. I know we've discussed the architect thing on the couple's page, but I couldn't remember if he'd mentioned it on the show. Sometimes it's hard to keep what they've said on camera and what we know from articles, SM, interview, etc straight. 😆

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8 hours ago, KateHearts said:

He is a photographer (shown in his intro episode) and an interior designer, which he mentioned in the same episode. Is there anything else?

And speaking of Ed, his whole way of speaking to Rosemarie is just... creepy, in part because it's so parental.  "Take your robe off, please" sent true shivers down my spine. And when they woke up in the morning, his singsong "good morrrning... you look so pretty" sounded like a dad saying to his four year old, "time to get up for daycare!!"  Just ick. And he has expressed over-the-top emotions several times now: "I'm dying and I need air conditioning," and "there are exposed wires; I'm scared." C'mon Ed; your friend told you flat out what to expect. You really are surprised at the conditions there?

As much as Big Egg wants this or any relationship he does not sound sincere or natural with the "take your robe off, you look so pretty, etc..." it sounds worse than scripted, very unnatural.  All of his conversation sounds like he is speaking to a complete stranger probably because he is but there is NO spark between them. Rosemarie may be lucky to have gotten someone to get her a green card but jeeze at what price.  She will live everyday losing a bit of herself every time Big Egg crawls on top of her, ick.

 

Edited by Baltimore Betty
missed a word that changes a whole sentence!
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7 hours ago, gavinmac said:

Avery needs to learn some cross-examination skills ASAP because this guy Ash is very, very slippery.

LAST WEEK:

Avery:  "When we talk about your son Taj moving to America, I feel like you sugarcoat it and and I'm not getting the full extent of what's going on. Is that accurate?"

Ash: "You see, your perspective, I respect it. We have have to talk about Taj and how this will work."

 

THIS WEEK:

Avery: "When can I meet Taj?"

Ash: "I'm looking forward to that actually." 

Avery: "When can I meet your ex-wife?"

Ash: "To tell you the truth, I'm working on that."

Avery: "So she hasn't said anything?"

Ash: "I'm working on it."

 

Avery shouldn't let him off the hook that easily. She's asking direct questions and he's deliberately avoiding all those questions and giving her non-responsive answers.  She should keep asking him "How are you working on it?" "Have you told your ex-wife I want to meet her, yes or no?" "What was her response, i.e. what exact words did she say when you told her I want to meet her?" 

Actually, Avery should just drop Ash and move on, because he's shady and he's bad news.

 

 

You are spot on about this.  

I just don't understand this from either point of view.  

For Avery, she is always going to face a ji-hoon/Devan situation, where ash won't tell her anything bad until he is absolutely forced.  

And maybe part of that is because she has run away when things got tough so ash feels he has to keep things from her, but that's no excuse and doesn't change the fact that she will always live on edge wondering what he is hiding from her....what kind of financial mess he is keeping from her, etc, etc

I also don't understand why ash is so hellbent on this relationship either.  

Yes, Avery is pretty and fit.  But that seems like all she has going for her.  

She isn't rich, she has a good job, but not a super high income job, she has two kids and at least one father is pretty involved, so that can be messy.  Her personality is allright I suppose but she doesn't seem like a sparkling conversationalist and she doesn't come off as having a fantastic wit.  Her ex boyfriend implied she was nuts.  

For as weird as Ash's eyes are, he has a better body than Sasha and a much better personality even if it's all smoke and mirrors.  

He works with single women all the time.  If he just wanted to get to America he could easily meet a dumb Emily type, who wouldn't give a shit where his kid is, wouldn't ask any questions and would put up with anything. 

He could probably meet a younger woman with a higher income and no children.  Or an attractive, well off woman his own age (there are lots of women with money in their 40s who keep themselves looking good).

So why would ash go through all this trouble?  

I can't figure out if he just wanted to see if he could get her here her as a personal challenge?  I don't know if he just wanted to get on TV?

If they want to be together one of them will have to move.  Maybe Ash's plan is to live in Seattle part of the year and Australia part of the year to be an involved dad and retain the relationship. 

I don't know.  I guess both of them have so many other options that this relationship seem odd to me. 

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After watching 90 day fiancé secrets and lies yesterday, Ash’s futile attempts at dodging Avery’s interrogation really grossed me out even more.  I was glad that she was putting enough energy into listening to him to call him out on his double talk but she never went far enough to force him into saying things yes or no.  I am reminded of an old boyfriend of mine who kept some very big secrets from me for years even when I point blank asked him the truth. When I finally found out years later, his excuse was I didn’t wanna make you mad. My response to that was well I’m really mad now. You can never trust people like that ever because their definitions of right and wrong are always skewed in their own favor, not yours. Very very selfish.  Avery needs to get out now.

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Ash’s muscular body reminds me of someone who works out a lot but... if he really has Graves’ disease, it does a big number on your body and I am shocked that he could maintain the muscular build unless he’s also using stuff that body builders use... in which case, he really does need to get to an endocrinologist.  He’s too young to be juggling his hormones like this without the oversight of a medical pro.

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32 minutes ago, RealReality said:

For as weird as Ash's eyes are, he has a better body than Sasha

Ash has a nice torso, but he has chicken legs that the leggings and  skinny jeans don’t help.  

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1 hour ago, Baltimore Betty said:

As much as Big Egg wants this or any relationship he does not sound sincere or natural with the "take your robe off, you look so pretty, etc..." it sounds worse than scripted, very unnatural.  All of his conversation sounds like he is speaking to a complete stranger probably because he is but there is spark between them. Rosemarie may be lucky to have gotten someone to get her a green card but jeeze at what price.  She will live everyday losing a bit of herself every time Big Egg crawls on top of her, ick.

 

It's like she is just a doll he can stylize and place. He doesn't seem to care what she wanted or liked- this is HIS show. Does she like hot baths? Foot rubs? Champagne? Doesn't matter. She just needs to sit on her butt (literally) and do as told. His relationship with his daughter is strained and he can't order her around anymore. Enter his new, younger model.

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2 hours ago, mamadrama said:

I know we've discussed the architect thing on the couple's page, but I couldn't remember if he'd mentioned it on the show.

His arch job was the business he went to when he discussed the upcoming trip with his Filipina co-worker.  

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10 hours ago, gavinmac said:

Avery: "When can I meet Taj?"

Ash: "I'm looking forward to that actually." 

Avery: "When can I meet your ex-wife?"

Ash: "To tell you the truth, I'm working on that."

Avery: "So she hasn't said anything?"

Ash: "I'm working on it."

He parroted the same "I'm working on it" phrase FOUR times! 

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2 hours ago, RealReality said:

You are spot on about this.  

I just don't understand this from either point of view.  

For Avery, she is always going to face a ji-hoon/Devan situation, where ash won't tell her anything bad until he is absolutely forced.  

And maybe part of that is because she has run away when things got tough so ash feels he has to keep things from her, but that's no excuse and doesn't change the fact that she will always live on edge wondering what he is hiding from her....what kind of financial mess he is keeping from her, etc, etc

I also don't understand why ash is so hellbent on this relationship either.  

Yes, Avery is pretty and fit.  But that seems like all she has going for her.  

She isn't rich, she has a good job, but not a super high income job, she has two kids and at least one father is pretty involved, so that can be messy.  Her personality is allright I suppose but she doesn't seem like a sparkling conversationalist and she doesn't come off as having a fantastic wit.  Her ex boyfriend implied she was nuts.  

For as weird as Ash's eyes are, he has a better body than Sasha and a much better personality even if it's all smoke and mirrors.  

He works with single women all the time.  If he just wanted to get to America he could easily meet a dumb Emily type, who wouldn't give a shit where his kid is, wouldn't ask any questions and would put up with anything. 

He could probably meet a younger woman with a higher income and no children.  Or an attractive, well off woman his own age (there are lots of women with money in their 40s who keep themselves looking good).

So why would ash go through all this trouble?  

I can't figure out if he just wanted to see if he could get her here her as a personal challenge?  I don't know if he just wanted to get on TV?

If they want to be together one of them will have to move.  Maybe Ash's plan is to live in Seattle part of the year and Australia part of the year to be an involved dad and retain the relationship. 

I don't know.  I guess both of them have so many other options that this relationship seem odd to me. 

I agree. I dont see what Ash could want from Avery, seriously and long term. I think he strictly just wants to be on TV. 

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2 hours ago, Spike said:

Ash has a nice torso, but he has chicken legs that the leggings and  skinny jeans don’t help.  

OMG!  WTH???  Those JEANS he wears are repulsive!  Chicken legs are right!  How can he think he looks attractive in those??

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16 hours ago, Spike said:

 

Is her town three hours from Manila?  If so, why was someone calling it a suburb?  

Caloocan where she lives is part of "Metro Manila." Ed said it was three hours from Manila, but that probably isn't accurate.

Google maps says it's 20 miles and 45 minutes by car away from "central Manila" (Intramuros or Makati).

Traffic in Manila can be horrific and I suspect that Rose would normally travel on local transport, using a series of jeepneys and buses, and that the 20 miles journey from her home to central Manila would take over an hour but less than 3 hours.

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(edited)
1 hour ago, Lily247 said:

I agree. I dont see what Ash could want from Avery, seriously and long term. I think he strictly just wants to be on TV. 

 

3 hours ago, RealReality said:

I also don't understand why ash is so hellbent on this relationship either.  

 

Didn't Avery visit Australia because Ash had no money to fly to the USA or couldn't get a visa due to a bankruptcy?  Maybe Ash's life in Australia just sucks. Divorced,  no money, no one is paying him for advice, no retirement savings, no viable career, no Australian citizenship, etc.

I don't remember if he is living with his more judgmental brother.  Maybe he just wants a "new life."   Or he may think the USA is less racist than Australia.

All I know is that I don't trust anything he says.

Edited by gavinmac
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57 minutes ago, not you again said:

Putting this behind a spoiler, but it's really just me speculating.

  Hide contents

I wonder if Ash isn't as divorced as he's led Avery to believe.

 

I think brother would have dropped an anvil hint about that. 

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2 hours ago, not you again said:

Putting this behind a spoiler, but it's really just me speculating.

  Hide contents

I wonder if Ash isn't as divorced as he's led Avery to believe.

 

Ehhh. Even if he wasnt officially divorced, it would barely make a dent on the mountain of reasons this couple will not work

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On 4/8/2020 at 6:21 AM, KateHearts said:

And he has expressed over-the-top emotions several times now: "I'm dying and I need air conditioning," and "there are exposed wires; I'm scared." C'mon Ed; your friend told you flat out what to expect. You really are surprised at the conditions there?

Plus, what does he expect Rose to do? Get out her weather control device and drop the temperature thirty degrees? Climb up on a ladder and do some electrical repair before snuggling up to Ed in her shoddy, sub-1000 thread count sheets? Prostrate herself on the ground and swear she hates America and only loves Ed for his repulsive personality?

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On 4/8/2020 at 9:25 AM, mamadrama said:

No, that's it. I know we've discussed the architect thing on the couple's page, but I couldn't remember if he'd mentioned it on the show. Sometimes it's hard to keep what they've said on camera and what we know from articles, SM, interview, etc straight. 😆

I absolutely remember Egg saying that Rose likes his long hair. This was before he left the states. Is the morning hair-flop pose his way of looking sexy? And stop with the constant need for affirmation, big egg!

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On 4/7/2020 at 1:31 AM, AussieBabe said:

I really hope Usman tipped the gentleman extra on Lisa’s tab. Maybe she should stop chasing foreign male parts if she’s going to gripe and bemoan every single thing about the country they live in. 

I have atopic dermatitis/contact dermatitis or just plain eczema. My dermatologist has never told me only thread counts above 1,000 would suffice. The thread count doesn’t matter as much as content/material. I have contact reactions to things like formaldehyde, Orange disperse dye, etc. So unless an allergen is in those sheets under 1000 thread count, he can miss me. If it was that dire, why ship the sheets? Everything else has gotten lost. Why chance it? Stick them in the suitcase or carryon! I pack sheets when I stay in hotels because whatever they use to wash them causes my eczema to haunt me like sleep paralysis demons. Aside from that, he slept on hotel sheets that probably weren’t 1,000+ thread count.

Erica is over Stephanie, and it has only been 72-96 hours.

The season isn’t complete if Darcey’s not crying.

I don’t care about the white version of Ceasar. He’s chasing after a computer.

those sheets arrived and were sold.

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Was Lisa's handbag a Michael Kors one? Couldn't read the name on the bag. She should have worn rubber rain boots to the goat market. And yes, the goats would smell. Not like opening a nice bar of perfumed goat milk soap. Maybe some moisturizer and some lip gloss would have done wonders. She looked tired, haggard, and old. Mama Usman should be a real treat.

Geoffrey, you do have to tell Varya the truth - and all of it. Not your being in jail for drug dealing. She has every business to know all about you and make a decision on whether to carry on a relationship with you. The egg and tomato breakfast did not look very filling.

Ed, you're unlikely to wash away in a thunderstorm. Hopefully it was a very humbling experience for you to see poverty. I was pretty creeped out at Rose's father sharing her bedroom with her and Ed. Ick.

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3 hours ago, Frozendiva said:

Was Lisa's handbag a Michael Kors one? Couldn't read the name on the bag. She should have worn rubber rain boots to the goat market. And yes, the goats would smell. Not like opening a nice bar of perfumed goat milk soap. Maybe some moisturizer and some lip gloss would have done wonders. She looked tired, haggard, and old. Mama Usman should be a real treat.

Geoffrey, you do have to tell Varya the truth - and all of it. Not your being in jail for drug dealing. She has every business to know all about you and make a decision on whether to carry on a relationship with you. The egg and tomato breakfast did not look very filling.

Ed, you're unlikely to wash away in a thunderstorm. Hopefully it was a very humbling experience for you to see poverty. I was pretty creeped out at Rose's father sharing her bedroom with her and Ed. Ick.

I didn't think her dad shared the bedroom. He said he was going to, and it was a big deal, but at the end he popped his head in and it sounded like he said he was going to sleep in the bedroom next to them. He does share the"shower" (aka bucket of water) though.

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10 hours ago, Frozendiva said:

 The egg and tomato breakfast did not look very filling.

I thought the exact same thing.  I was thinking that if that had been MY breakfast I would have to pick up something else to eat shortly after we left Mom's place.

10 hours ago, Frozendiva said:

Ed, you're unlikely to wash away in a thunderstorm. Hopefully it was a very humbling experience for you to see poverty. I was pretty creeped out at Rose's father sharing her bedroom with her and Ed. Ick.

Ed is afraid of everything.  Worry, worry, worry, fret, stew, worry.  He would be exhausting to be around.  He probably screams when he sees a spider on the wall.   Rose's father said he was going to sleep "next door".   That bed sure looked comfy!  (not!) lol

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Ed Is afraid of everything he cannot control, which is everything outside his sheltered, little life in San Diego.  I cannot imagine him with a mainstream American woman.  He would risk his superiority.

Usman seems to be screaming for help as he dotes on Lisa the best he can without destroying himself.  The way he holds her hand, palm up, so she can lightly lay her hand atop his like a princess in court arising from her throne... and he wraps his arm around her as if she might tip over and shatter at any moment... can’t wait to meet his mom.  She will see thru this game in a heartbeat. You want a wife for your son who will make him happy and joyful and won’t cause him strife... not Lisa.

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After seeing the conditions and lifestyle in Rose’s home and town, I am really curious to know what life was like for last year’s cast member, Juliana, who told us how bad her life was.  Could it have been this bad or... basic?  Disclaimer:  I love that entire Rose’s family came to meet him for dinner and Pa is trying to be kind to him.  They all know what is going on and the fact that he said that he was just there to date her is insulting and was painful to watch.

 I wonder if we could get some backstory episodes for previous cast members (the ones trying to come to the US).  The first half being could be about where they started and why they started doing this and the second half of the hour (!) being about where they are now and how they feel about their journey.  Not about the Americans!

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15 hours ago, Frozendiva said:

Was Lisa's handbag a Michael Kors one?

I can’t imagine the words “Lisa” and “Michael Kors handbag” in the same sentence, but Wal-Mart knock-off, yes. I doubt if she knew she would need to pack rubber boots for goat shopping. 

edited yet again to add: Good eyes, @Frozendiva, the bag does have some kind of "MK" looking fob hanging off it. Still, I can't believe it's authentic. 

I wonder if she regrets her ring tattoo which I assume was from her marriage. Take heed, Tania. 

One thing I’ve noticed about Lisa’s story line, though, is that they’re not playing up the “she’s poor but sends money overseas” angle with her like they did with Danielle, Nicole and Angela. She doesn’t appear to be squandering money on young foreign dick and neglecting her child. In fact, I have to give her credit for not involving her daughter in this whole filming farce. 

Edited by magemaud
edited to add Nicole
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1 hour ago, AZChristian said:
1 hour ago, magemaud said:

In fact, I have to give her credit for not involving her daughter in this whole filming farce. 

She didn't want anyone younger and prettier on camera during HER segments.

Sounds like Maleficent. 

Anyway, we are being spared the frustration of watching a wise-beyond-her-years child trying to convince her mother that she's making a big mistake. 

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6 hours ago, Colfrmb2 said:

After seeing the conditions and lifestyle in Rose’s home and town, I am really curious to know what life was like for last year’s cast member, Juliana, who told us how bad her life was.  Could it have been this bad or... basic?  

It could have been. She said she was so poor in Brazil she would steal fruit from the neighbor's tree right?  Poor in Brazil is similar to poor in the Philippines.

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The breakfast Varya ate at her mother's place (sunny side up egg and some tomato wedges, likely salted) is a very Russian style breakfast. Its also very healthy. 

Regarding "comparing poverties", I would say hands down, the most poverty stricken places we have seen on 90 day fiance were in the Phillipines, particularly, what comes to my mind, Jenny (whose mother worked as a domestic help overseas, perhaps the Gulf) and Hazel. With Rosemary, Im sure natural genetics come into play, but to me she looks unhealthy.

 Im sure there is deep poverty in the favelas of Brazil, but Juliana would not shut up talking about how poor she was without her wierd little smirks. Plus, it had evidently been quite a while since she left such poverty to go party on yachts in Europe amd have wealthy 40 something year old boyfriends. 

Edited by Lily247
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