All Episodes Talk: Let’s Talk About Dr Phil the Show

[Gam2]

Thank you for giving us your perspective as someone who's been subjected to this. I can't pretend to understand this because I was raised in a loving family with parents/grandparents/aunts&uncles who loved us and took such good care of all of us. I do realize how lucky my sisters and I were as was my husband with his large extended family. My husband was a criminal investigator in the Army for 20 years. He worked a number of child sexual assault cases. They absolutely sickened us because we had two children of our own.  May I ask a respectful question? If you had children, why would you have thought nothing of leaving them with your molester? In my mind, that's the very last thing I'd have done in fear that he'd do the same thing to my child that he'd done to me. Of course, having a child is a life changing event so perhaps if you'd had children, that would have changed your thinking? Thank you for any reply you feel you could make to answer my questions. If not, I do understand.

[QuelleC]

I had the tv molested by a stranger in a girl scout dress and while I remember talking to the police he was never found and 45 years later I still wonder.

[MrSmith]

@Gam2 Well, the thing is that I didn't think there was anything wrong with what he did to me at the time. I was probably around 10 when it started and 13 when it ended. My thinking for a lot of years was that I had consented to it and so there was nothing wrong with it (he did ask my permission to touch me; not saying that makes it right, just explaining my perspective). It wasn't until my mid-20's that I really grok'd that it was wrong in spite of my having consented. And perhaps if I had had children, my perspective would have changed more quickly than it did and perhaps I would have kept my children away from him. He died when I was 16 (I remember because I was working at McD's and couldn't get off work for the funeral) and so I never got to talk to him about what he did or why. It took me going to counseling for other issues in my early 30's to really get to grips with the whole thing. I actually hope that I get to see him again at the end of all things and get the chance to talk to him about it.

Edited to add: I don't recall whether he told me to keep it a secret. Either way, I wouldn't have said anything to my parents about it because I've never been able to talk to my parents about anything of import. Even to this day, my father and I share an interest in computers and technology, but I can't talk to him about it because my mother gets angry and bitches about us talking about technology "all the time". So, that rules out talking about my work (since I'm a programmer) and rules out talking about any of my hobbies. That leaves talking to them about TV shows that I watch, which they generally do not, talking to them about the dog, which they have no interest in either, having my mother nag and berate me for not going to church, and listening to my mother detail her last bowel movement (no, really!). And then they wonder why I struggle to call them even once a month!

Edited February 22, 2017 by MrSmith
Moved some text around for clarity.

[GiveMeSpace]

MR Smith-I appreciate you sharing your experience. I had a similar one. This is what I meant about people thinking that sexual abuse is violent or even unpleasant. Therein lies the problem. It is one thing when someone violently rapes you and quite another when someone you love and respect takes advantage of you.  I can also relate to your parental woes. Hang in there.

[poeticlicensed]

That old man pedophile was disgusting. Listen grandma, it is not appropriate for a grown man to bathe with little children 

And color me shocked that he actually took the polygraph. I figured he's chicken out before they wired him in. But I guess he thought he could outsmart the machine. He gave off such arrogance, he probably figured he could pass, plus I get the sense that he thought anything he did wasn't wrong. Of course he picked grandma because she had a daughter. Of course he encouraged her to keep the baby. That's what pedophiles do. He had a 9 year old child? CPS needs to go investigate 

[Wings]

@MrSmith,  Thank you for the peek into your life.  Again, I understand why sexual abuse is held in secret.  I was a couples counselor for 30 years.  I changed my title from therapist to counselor, for reasons regarding my philosophy on the profession.  Way OT to go into that here.  

Though the relationship with your parents is unfortunate I had a hearty laugh.  Finding humor in upsetting circumstances is key to a healthy life.  If you can laugh at your mothers expense, and I think you can, you are a fine specimen of mental health!  My parents died young so never reached the bowel movement talk stage, for which I am grateful. 

[MrSmith]

@wings707 Well, for what it's worth, you're welcome. It's kind of weird because I'm not really embarrassed about it and yet I don't really talk about it. After all, it's just another fact.

Yeah, I'm mostly able to laugh at my mother's expense. When she starts talking about the uncomfortable stuff, I just tune her out and interject a couple of appropriate words here and there. LOL

On topic, I'm looking forward to watching yesterday's Dr. Phil when I get home. We didn't get a chance to watch it yet because APB and Timeless were more important.

[Madding crowd]

Thank you to those who shared their first hand experiences here, I wish you all the best in life. I do find it hard to believe the mom would leave her daughter with a man who she knows is an abuser. Then I thought about it and realized: She probably had no one to watch the daughter and no money to pay a babysitter and the man probably threatened her with custody issues. Still, I wish she would have called the police or child protective services on the old pervert.

The grandma thinks she is getting by with saying she doesn't remember or was in a different place, but she seemed to remember her daughter saying the granddaughter was not to take baths with or be alone with the step grandpa. It was telling when she said "I didn't know my daughter was even interested in him" and Dr. Phil said "She wasn't." These damn women have such low self esteem they even become jealous of the child being abused rather than understanding it is not the child's choice and the child is not capable of such as choice. They don't turn in the bastards because they think no one else would want them. Phil has been acting professional about once or twice a week these days-it makes me happy. 

Edited February 22, 2017 by Madding crowd

[Gam2]

MrSmith, thank you so much for your cogent answer to my questions. It did help me understand more about this issue. As adults, we know that young children cannot "consent" to anything like this but if children are with trusted adults, it leads them to believe that the adults are always right. Thank you also to everyone else who has weighed in on this discussion. I wish with all of my heart that this discussion never has to take place at all because child abuse, of any kind, never takes place. 

[Brattinella]

2 hours ago, Madding crowd said:

"I didn't know my daughter was even interested in him"

Shaking my head @ this statement.  Gah!

[Jaded]

I just read that David Cassidy is going to be on Phub's show to discuss his dementia diagnosis. 

[morriss]

$hil has finally hit rock bottom.  Exploiting a poor family's grief for a few bullshit rating points.....It hasn't even been a month since the lady was shot. 

[Wings]

3 hours ago, MrSmith said:

@wings707 Well, for what it's worth, you're welcome. It's kind of weird because I'm not really embarrassed about it and yet I don't really talk about it. After all, it's just another fact.

Yeah, I'm mostly able to laugh at my mother's expense. When she starts talking about the uncomfortable stuff, I just tune her out and interject a couple of appropriate words here and there. LOL

On topic, I'm looking forward to watching yesterday's Dr. Phil when I get home. We didn't get a chance to watch it yet because APB and Timeless were more important.

YES!  That should be a goal in therapy/life and moved toward quickly.  

[MrSmith]

@Gam2 You're welcome. Talking about it from time to time makes it a little easier to talk about. So, it helped me to answer your questions.

@wings707 If I had the option to change careers, psychologist would be something I would look at. The mind is an interesting thing.

[Gam2]

MrSmith, I'm truly glad it helped you to answer my questions. I hesitated to even ask them because I didn't want to intrude into your life, memories or hurtful feelings about your family. I'm not sure I could ever be as forgiving or humorous about my parents/family as you've been able to do but apparently, you had a really good therapist and was willing to do the work to become a fully functional adult. Wow. I sound like Dr. Phil psychologist speak. Yikes. At any rate, thanks for helping us all to understand this horrifying, difficult problem. So glad you're having a good life with your wife! Keep in touch, please. 

[Lion18]

On 2/21/2017 at 6:50 PM, Brattinella said:

I'm so sorry YOU had to go through this too, AZChristian.  I have a similar story.  I rarely speak of it, but I have healed.

I also was abused by my biological father. He would grab my sister and I in inappropriate places in front of my mom. I remember her saying once or twice to him to stop

then until I was 19 he would corner me when she wasn't around. I didn't tell mom until I was 50. She acted shocked.

the wife/ mom on the show definitely knew of the abuse. I didn't believe her for a second

and I also don't know how the daughter left her little girl with them

[Brattinella]

I'm so sorry, Lion18.  There sure are a lot of us!

[FairyDusted]

*pulls  up a seat*  The kind of club nobody wants be a part of. 

[Brattinella]

You too, FairyDusted?  I'm so sorry!

[AZChristian]

Dr. Phil even said early into this show that ONE OUT OF FOUR girls has been molested at some point in her childhood.  Think about that the next time you are in a room full of people; you are among friends . . . you just don't know it.

[FairyDusted]

Oh yes....my family takes "keeping it in the family" to the extreme. One is dead. One I want dead. And I one made the amends and meant it. 

[MrSmith]

Wow. There are a lot of us.

So, last night we got to watch the 2nd half of that two parter with the molester. It was amazing to me how well-rehearsed his answers were. I could tell he was lying because there were things that he said that didn't make sense when you considered other things he said, and because there was misalignment in some of the events. Also, I've yet to encounter someone who can remember something as unimportant as being regaled by the details of someone else's experience at a concert and yet cannot remember the specifics of important conversations. My mother is the only person I've met that comes close, if you take her protestations of failed recall at face value (and I don't). There was something about his mannerisms that really skeeved me out, but I can't put my finger on it.

Finally, did anyone else notice that the mother/grandmother looks a lot like Robin, including some of her facial expressions? My wife and I thought if you aged Robin about 20 years and withheld the effects of her miracle face cream, then she'd look a lot like that mother/grandmother. We thought they even kind of sound alike.

Edited February 23, 2017 by MrSmith

[ClareWalks]

This guy who thinks he's a prophet is cracked. Look at this fuckin' hipster, y'all.

[ChiCricket]

I was thinking he has schizophrenia. Just a guess in my uneducated opinion.

[MrSmith]

Just got done watching the episode with the guy from Texas that shot his neighbor. Wow! I am not a proponent of the death penalty, but even I have to admit there are some egregious cases where the offender deserves it - and this is one of those cases. Even if this woman was charging at the guy like he claims, that would mean he'd have had to be on her property for her to be any kind of inescapable threat. So, he would fail the Castle Doctrine or whatever Texas has got. And if he was on his own property, then she wasn't an inescapable threat. Plus, when you see the thing she was wearing when she was shot, it's very clear he fired at her from her right and several feet above the point of entry. And that indicates she was actually kneeling like her family claims she was.

"Give him the electric cure!" or "Fry him up real nice now, boys!"

Edited to add: After watching this one, I told my wife that I'm going to be The Punisher in my next life. She's ok with that as long as she's either the reason for it or gets to sit that life out. LOL

Edited February 23, 2017 by MrSmith

[slasherboy]

23 hours ago, Brattinella said:

I'm so sorry, Lion18.  There sure are a lot of us!

I think there are more of us than aren't.  Here's wishing the best out of life we can handle.

[slasherboy]

On 2/21/2017 at 10:51 PM, QuelleC said:

I had the tv molested by a stranger in a girl scout dress and while I remember talking to the police he was never found and 45 years later I still wonder.

Could you explain this further, please?  I have absolutely no idea what this means.  Thanks!

[QuelleC]

It means while I'm fortunate to not have to deal with a perverted family member for the rest of my life, having a stranger encounter has its own difficulties. I wanted to keep it short while empathyzing with others because I hate typing on a phone and I felt we were going to get a warning for being off topic.  

Edited February 24, 2017 by QuelleC
tv means when I was a kid we were told in Very Special Episodes it was all about strangers.

[BusyOctober]

I haven't watch full Phil episodes in a very long time so I rarely see the last 5-10 min. Since I have no desire to see him hold hands with Robin, I know I am not missing much.  Today I only tuned in for the last few minutes while waiting for another show, and who hogs these last few minutes but Lady Lockjaw herself.  She was hawking her stupid potions and pulled the old Oprah trick of hiding a sample under everyone's chair. But Robin can't do it with Oprah's exuberance because she can't open her damn mouth to speak. That woman has to stop effing up her chin, cheeks & lips with all the Soylent Green injections. When she tries to talk, all I can picture is the Tin Man, clenching out his request for rusty relief ; "oilcan...oilcan!"

[ed2962]

On ‎2‎/‎23‎/‎2017 at 5:26 PM, ChiCricket said:

I was thinking he has schizophrenia. Just a guess in my uneducated opinion.

Yeah, the letter from the mother said she thought he was bipolar. As the show went on I think it was clear that he was not 100% stable. He started to go off when Phil said, "I've been in the church since I was 12 and it's offensive when people use God for their own ends..." Dude seemed genuinely mad that Phil didn't believe that he was a profit. And Dude seemed to agree to accept the help not because he thought he needed it, but because he thought he'd prove everyone wrong.

 

Having said that, when Phil said "it's offensive to my sensibilities" it reminded me of the con-woman Brittany episode. They're back stage talking to her and she refers to Dr Phil as a "reality show" and Phillip balked at the term. I'm like wait...You've deliberately copied the formats of other reality shows ( Dr Phil house etc) you sensationalize all sorts of news and celebrity gossip, you ambush guests...how is it not a reality show?

[ed2962]

I thought super hero son had some mental issues as well, although maybe they aren't extreme. The previews make it look like he was some lazy jerk and I kinda think he was, but when Mom and Dad explained about how he goes around arguing with his five year brother over toys and spray painting random objects in the house, he probably needs some medication.

[MrSmith]

I think the super hero son is bipolar. The way he describes himself seems to fit. I'm surprised the parents are incapable of working on finding a solution and helping him that stops short of going on Dr Phil. I can't imagine that they couldn't have sat down and talked to him and said, "Look. We think there is clearly something wrong with you. We're going to pay for you to see a counselor and get tested. And once we know what's going on, then we can figure out how best to help you going forward."

[FairyDusted]

Him and The Profit Dude had major issues. I was uncomfortable watching the ninja and the Jesus. To think I was appalled with the girl pregnant with Jesus.  

[charmed1]

AZChristian, I'm so very, very sorry. I've heard the same excuse that your mother gave, from various other older mothers. That they had no place to go. Etterlene DeBarge, mother of the famous R&B musical family, "DeBarge" when asked why didn't she leave the husband who was physically assaulting her and sexually and physically assaulting their children, "Where could I go? Ten little children, who would take us in?" Though Mrs. DeBarge had other issues to contend with. A black woman married to a white man in the 50s and 60s, unfortunately, had consequences to say the least. Her livelihood was very much connected to her husband and his income. And by the time the abuse stopped, the kids were grown and not only abusing each other, but heavily abusing drugs. Some of them still are.

The abuse episodes are hard to watch. I'll take a catfish episode where Phillip gets to use his giant tablet with SnagIt over them any day. 

Edited February 27, 2017 by charmed1

[ClareWalks]

Something is off with this family today. The out of control teen says Dad beats her up, and his response is basically "yeah, I smacked you, but if I'd wanted to I could have put you in the hospital"? WTF? And Dr. Phil just lets that slide? Obviously there is more wrong here than just that kid being a douche and stealing cars/getting high.

[Madding crowd]

I agree-Dr Phil is accusing her of lying and seems to be approving of her being abused. I'm guessing this is one of those military families where dad rules with an iron fist, the kids are given zero rights and this girl is caught n the middle. 

[chenoa333]

Just saw Dr Phil's preview for the episode with David Cassidy. Sweet baby Jesus, Cassidy is only 66 years old!? And I wish the 15 year old "out of control teen" would quit squealing like a piglet. My ears hurt.

[ClareWalks]

3 minutes ago, chenoa333 said:

Just saw Dr Phil's preview for the episode with David Cassidy. Sweet baby Jesus, Cassidy is only 66 years old!? And I wish the 15 year old "out of control teen" would quit squealing like a piglet. My ears hurt.

LOL and she added like 2 extra syllables to the end word of every sentence. "No it's nah-wuhh-tuh!" (for "not")

[Gam2]

My husband and I were raised in the military and were also active duty military ourselves (he was active duty, I was the wife and mom). "Dad rules with an iron fist" has nothing to do with the military and everything to do with the man being a controlling jerk. That happens across society at all socioeconomic levels. 

[Toaster Strudel]

That 15 yr old is in pain and Dr Phil is totally missing the ball on this.  The parents are clever enough to look like angels on TV.  The girl may be scapegoated... I do believe she is being abused.  I guess he'll send her to horse camp and solve nothing.

[cooksdelight]

I'm not sure what's going on with the teenager who is out of control. I've known girls like that who had loving, but firm parents. Wild child is what we called them. The way she glosses over what she's done like it's no big deal, and getting freaked out over her social media posts being made public in front of her parents (that was my clue this girl is more than a handful), I can believe that her parents have grounded her and taken away her phone and she revolted. I am not sure he's beating the kids, they are smart enough to take photos of blood or injuries, right? They take video and photos of everything else. So why not document that?

How on earth the kids got control is beyond me. I'm looking forward to hearing Granny's take on this today, since she is the one who contacted Dr. Phil about the family. Maybe we'll get to the bottom of things.

[MrSmith]

I don't believe the 15 year old or her 13 year old sister are being abused. The 15 year old can claim she's terrified of being choked or slammed against the wall by her father all she wants to, but that doesn't make it true. If she were actually afraid of those things happening to her, she wouldn't be doing everything in her power to cause them to happen to her. Did anyone else notice her whining about having to move? I was like "Sorry, but that's part of being the child of someone in the military." She should just be happy that her father had already been in the military for at least 6 years before she was born, because that's at least one move she didn't have to live through. Also, did anyone else catch her whining about not having money to go do things? Perhaps that's something she should think about next time she wants to throw a party that causes over $15,000 damage to her parents' house.

I don't understand why her parents aren't taking things away from the children, such as their cell phones, usage of the computers, and so on until they decide they want to start behaving. I also don't understand why her parents haven't just put her in a military academy. Sure, it's expensive since it's a boarding school, but better paying for that than having to worry about her killing you in your sleep, stealing your cars, and so on. That kid has basically ensured she won't get her driver's license until after she's moved out of her parents' house. I can't imagine that she would be insurable and, even if she is, it would probably cost more to ensure her than to ensure a boy of the same age.

13 hours ago, ClareWalks said:

Something is off with this family today. The out of control teen says Dad beats her up, and his response is basically "yeah, I smacked you, but if I'd wanted to I could have put you in the hospital"? WTF? And Dr. Phil just lets that slide? Obviously there is more wrong here than just that kid being a douche and stealing cars/getting high.

And that is not the way the father meant what he said that you've quoted here. He was refuting her accusations of abuse by saying that if she were truly being physically abused, then she would have had far more dire injuries than she's claiming she has. It's very clear in both his tone and the context of the conversation that this is his point.

[ClareWalks]

5 minutes ago, MrSmith said:

And that is not the way the father meant what he said that you've quoted here. He was refuting her accusations of abuse by saying that if she were truly being physically abused, then she would have had far more dire injuries than she's claiming she has. It's very clear in both his tone and the context of the conversation that this is his point.

Yeah but he did admit to smacking her. He said "I didn't punch you in the face, I smacked you in the head." Maybe we'll find out more today, but something is off with this guy. Saying "I was trained in the military, if I'd abused you you would have been hospitalized" is not the same as saying "I never hit you." It's basically saying if I went all-out, I'd be caught (so I didn't).

[MrSmith]

9 minutes ago, ClareWalks said:

Yeah but he did admit to smacking her. He said "I didn't punch you in the face, I smacked you in the head." Maybe we'll find out more today, but something is off with this guy. Saying "I was trained in the military, if I'd abused you you would have been hospitalized" is not the same as saying "I never hit you." It's basically saying if I went all-out, I'd be caught (so I didn't).

I disagree. He even went so far as to make the point that if he were actually abusing her, she would have been more hurt. Should he have smacked in the back of the head? No, but I can tell you right now that if that were my kid pulling what she's pulling, then she'd actually be a lot more afraid of me than she is of him. And I wouldn't have to assault her to instill that fear, either. There are plenty of ways to make her life a living hell until she straightens out without being abusive in any way.

[ClareWalks]

52 minutes ago, MrSmith said:

I disagree. He even went so far as to make the point that if he were actually abusing her, she would have been more hurt. Should he have smacked in the back of the head? No, but I can tell you right now that if that were my kid pulling what she's pulling, then she'd actually be a lot more afraid of me than she is of him. And I wouldn't have to assault her to instill that fear, either. There are plenty of ways to make her life a living hell until she straightens out without being abusive in any way.

Huh. I do not know what you mean by that, specifically. My father did not consider himself abusive, but I assure you he was. I was terrified of him. We have no relationship now.

This kid is obviously not a saint, my point is that this father is sketchy and obviously this girl is the end result of his parenting.

[MrSmith]

Well, let's see. You can do what Dr Phil refers to as "commando parenting", which is taking everything away from them including their bed. Give her 7 outfits to wear every week and those are the ones she gets until either they wear out or she straightens out. Believe me, kids will start making fun of her for wearing the same outfits week after week. (Peer pressure can be a useful force.) Force her to do her own laundry, her own cooking (all supervised, of course). Drop her off at school and walk her into the principal's office every morning, and pick her up from school every afternoon. If she skips class after you drop her off, then simply have one of the parents go to school with her to each class and sit next to/behind her (not possible for everyone; my wife is a housewife and so this is something we could do). Her mobile phone and Internet access would have long since been taken away. There'd be no friends calling for her or even allowed to stop by. There'd be no fun things to do: no birth day parties, no dining out with the family (if the family goes out to eat, she brings sandwiches and drinks water), no vacations, etc. On the weekends, get her jobs mowing people's lawns and such, or just let her go to her job once she's old enough to have a job. Then she can use that money to buy things back from the parents that she wants. For example, if she wants an 8th outfit, then she can buy one from the closet in which we're keeping her clothes (probably actually a storage unit in order to fully deny her any access). And if the family goes out to eat, she can decide whether it's worth the money to pay for her own meal or continue to eat sandwiches and drink water. Once she's earned the privilege of doing fun things with friends again, she can decide whether she's willing to pay for our chauffeur services or use public transportation. If she wants her mobile phone back, then she can buy it back and start paying her portion of the phone bill. Internet access can be purchased by the hour or by the day, with an additional fee for using my computer (rather than purchasing her own).

Believe me, she'd learn the value of a dollar real fast and very quickly wouldn't have money for drugs, booze, and partying. Even once she has money for drugs and booze, I very much doubt she's going to want to spend it that way - especially knowing that I'll just take everything away again and she'll have to buy her clothes, bed, and so on back again. And once she's 17, if I catch her with drugs, I'd have the police put her in jail. Nobody's bringing drugs into my house and exposing me to the risk that the police decide to seize the house because they raided it for drugs. And if you think that can't happen, it can and it does: https://www.google.com/webhp?sourceid=chrome-instant&ion=1&espv=2&ie=UTF-8#q=house+seized+by+police&*

[Lion18]

1 hour ago, ClareWalks said:

Yeah but he did admit to smacking her. He said "I didn't punch you in the face, I smacked you in the head." Maybe we'll find out more today, but something is off with this guy. Saying "I was trained in the military, if I'd abused you you would have been hospitalized" is not the same as saying "I never hit you." It's basically saying if I went all-out, I'd be caught (so I didn't).

Teenagers in this generation are very different. I have a daughter who just turned 18. Since age 15 she is very defiant, challenging, stays out all hours and recently dated a 24 year old

her friends are the same. No respect for adults or authority 

when she was almost 16 she stayed out to 3 AM. The next day as a consequence I attempted to take her phone away. We got into a physical altercation. I got the phone and threw it down the trash shute

 

stupidity I called the police thinking they would " help". They came and started off blasting into my daughter but as soon as they found out we we got physical. I got handcuffs slapped on me and spent the night in jail. They said you're the adult so you go to jail. My daughter and I both had bruises on our arms and to top it off the officer went in the trash and gave her back her phone and said that I had no right taking it from her in case she needed to call 911. 

All the officers in jail were saying that parents have no rights and my daughter should be in jail not me. The judge saw me in the morning, by then I was crying, he knew I was a single parent, highly educated and worked in the education field  he let me go without bail  the state wanted to fry me but he over ruled them

Something is wrong here. In this society. 

Ill wait to see part two to see what's going on in their home. I had a very strict dad but I behaved and was respectful 

[cooksdelight]

When I was watching the dad locking the bedroom door with a belt, I thought of a much better use for that belt. My parents didn't hesitate to whip me when I misbehaved, not minor things either. I once decided it would be fun to hide in the ditch in front of our house and dart out in front of cars when they drove by. I darted in front of a large truck and my mother dragged me inside and locked me in my room. When Dad got home, I got a whipping I still remember to this day.... and I never, ever misbehaved like that again. I was five.

I wonder if the parents have overindulged their kids to the point now the kids think they are owed whatever they want? Looks like it.

[BusyOctober]

I sure hope the girls in that family aren't being hurt, but as of right now, my opinion is they are brats. The 15 yo, like a lot of teenagers, thinks she is invincible, just having fun, isn't hurting anybody, it's my life, parents just don't understand yadda yadda.  However, she showed just how immature and naive she really is when she looked so astounded that Dr. Phil had her social media posts.  She looked so shocked that Phil had access to her idiot behavior without understanding the ANYONE can have that same access.  There is no privacy on the internet.  She's too stupid to see that all her posts to Instagram, FB, Twitter and even Snapchat are out there in cyber space forever.  As for her plans to get a good job & go to college...she obviously was unaware (til Phil pointed it out) that all her illegal activities will be seen by college admissions and employers.  Even employers in small sandwich shops or grocery stores have access to Google.  

[cooksdelight]

When it was revealed the damage she and her friends did to the house, I was astounded that she wasn't grounded, or better yet -- call police and have every one of them arrested. Make them pay back the damage. When I was a senior, my parents said it was OK for me to have a party at the house after the prom. They were going to be out of town, but knew because they'd raised me to be responsible, it would be OK. It was. Everyone had a fun time...no one left if they'd been drinking, everyone stayed the night. Boys slept upstairs, the girls slept in the basement bedrooms. Next morning, we cleaned everything up and hauled off all the trash to the dump. The house was spotless when my parents got home. I cannot imagine this girl doing anything like that because her parents haven't taught her so.