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S08.E09: Ready When You Are


druzy
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As Maci comes to the end of her birth control, she suggests Taylor get a vasectomy. When social media explodes after Tyler goes out with friends in Arizona, Catelynn has a night out on the town with her girlfriends. Cheyenne goes to Baltimore.

Airs July 29, 2019

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(edited)

Wow, Catelynn really is a lazy-ass cow (who is shutting down her udders, pardon the pun).  How does she think employed women do this?!  She doesn’t have time?  She doesn’t have the energy?  Give me a break.  Maybe she needs another couple of weeks of pampering at adult day camp.

Edited by Suzy Rhapsody
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Tone down the makeup Cate, and I don't buy she was all for Tyler going to Arizona to party....I'm sure she texted him continuously.... She is telling Tyler what he wants to hear so she doesn't lose him...deep down she knows Tyler will walk if she goes back to the Spa.

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(edited)
54 minutes ago, druzy said:

This show is way past its expiration date.

Seriously. Towards what I thought was the end, I started looking at the Direct TV guide to see what to watch next. Turns out it was only 8:32 pm. Yyaawwnn....

Why is so Cheyenne so desperate to land a man ? She's pretty and very young, loads of time to shop around. 

Maci, Taylor is looking to his post-MTV days, and you may or may not be in his plans.  Dont push the  vasectomy. 

Did Cate go partying on a Tues night ? Not many people at that club. 

In all seriousness  can you feel your liver when its swollen or whatever term Amber used ? 

Edited by Chris Knight
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(edited)

T&C let Nova sit in the kitchen counter and she tumbles off. Then they put the baby (?Veda?) in a sleeper with no barriers on the couch where she could easily tumble off🙄 

Edited by Maire
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I swear, Maci's PCOS woe might be real but it still feels contrived as fuck. It's like since she's placed herself as the Good Parent in opposition to Ryan's tractor full of dysfunction, all her stories must feature her as responsible, informed, conscientious. Maybe she really IS passionate about PCOS issues and maybe she really DOES want to make smart decisions about family planning, but it comes across as her checking off boxes to better frame her image. Meanwhile, MTV gets to believe it's done its due diligence by talking about birth control and acting like this show really can prevent unwanted pregnancies.

I rarely comment on Cheyenne, but man, it must be exhausting to deal with someone who's got such high expectations on such a condensed timeframe. I think I might actually be able to like her if she'd mature enough to realize life's not a race and she doesn't have to have a ring on her finger and a man on her arm right this very instant. Slow down, there's so much more to this world than stressing over locking down a reluctant dude.

Cate's girls' night out was pathetically tame. You would never, ever catch me at a club, but even I could be wilder than letting someone stick their hand on my tits. I still feel like despite Cate and Tyler insisting everything's dandy, they're each just going along to get along rather than really being content with each other.

MTV is truly delusional if they expect anyone to give an iota of a fuck about Amber's health problems. All her sniveling worry that her genetic propensity for poor health could be inherited by her kids is meaningless when we know she does nothing to protect them from things that are actually in her control: her behavior and her actions. At present, it's Amber herself who is most detrimental to her kids' health, not the DNA she contributed.

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Cate is full of excuses/justifications of her shitty parenting.  I need me time, I can't breastfeed, etc.  She is also way too concerned about what is being said about her on social media.  She should listen to her docs & stay off of it.

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57 minutes ago, Suzy Rhapsody said:

If one of them decided to stop breastfeeding and switch to formula, I would applaud her that she made it this far and buy her a drink to celebrate. 

But she did make it through the important part, when all the yellow goop with the good stuff in it comes out.  Or that's what Dr. Baltierra said, anyway.

I haven't been watching this show, but was already slumming with the Bachelorette and thought, what the hell.  And my reaction is, What the hell?  Egad, this show is boring.

Tyler remains manic and over the top when he's explaining what a cool cat he is and how the hatters are dumb.  Every interaction those two have somehow seems so unnatural.

PCOS-ridden Maci dealing with the heartbreak of hyperfertility.  On the golf course.  Very relatable.

Amber discussing the findings to be expected from the test she was taking with the blood taker.  Who said it measured liver "emzymes."  But Amber's got one on me--I couldn't find my liver in my belly if you paid me. 

I don't even know who this Cheyenne is, but her boyfriend's father had on a wristwatch that would make Flavor Flav envious. 

In the thing at the end, they showed Rhine but I didn't see him in the episode.  But it appears we have another Mackenzie on deck.  Who's dealing with her mother's (?) chemotherapy. 

I'm kind of ashamed that it took this level of mundanity and scriptedness to finally make me see the light, but I'll take it.

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This whole episode felt like watching public service announcements. Birth control and PCOS. Breastfeeding and mental health. Genetic predispositions and more mental health. And another dinner party for Cheyenne. 

Amber you can't talk about having possible liver problems and telling us how worried you are because you have to take your meds for your bipolar and another million of your diagnoses and selfdiagnoses when you told us several times - most recently only few episodes ago - that you DON'T take your meds responsibly and take break from them whenever you feel like or in the order to have few drinks. I would bet that when  the recent arrest happened it was another time when she was of her meds. 

Catelyn is getting someone to do her make up now. It's always too done like not for normal laying around the house kind of make up but going to the club kind. She should ask the make up artist to tone it down as she looks ridiculous. And how many times in a 4-6 weeks period (the baby still needs supporting the head so it can't be that long ago since she gave birth) she needed ME TIME to take care of herself? She does nothing else but takes care of herself on daily basis. She takes less care of that baby and forget about doing any parenting of notCarly.  Now that she stopped breastfeeding it will be on Tyler to take care of Vaeda too. I barely ever see her do anything regarding the childcare. I guess she learned from her TM bestie Amber to delegate! Children are cutting into their ME TIME! 

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In some ways , I think being home all day with kids is harder than going to work and then coming home to your kids but .. 

catelynn makes every excuse in the book of why she needs ME time and it seems she needs it daily when in reality , parents don’t get much me time , especially when a kid is less than 6 weeks old . So far in a few week period , she’s been to spas , clubs , date nights etc . She makes hundreds of thousands of dollars a year for sitting around and having me time . At some point , either stop complaining about responsibilities that kids come with or stop having kids . Maci and Chelsea don’t work but you can tell they genuinely enjoy being Mothers and really don’t complain much ( on camera .) . They probably do take a lot of me time because they have the resources but whenever they’re shown with their kids, they look like they are actively parenting . Catelynn wants to be a mom but she doesn’t want to parent them . 

Speaking of Maci , I know nothing about PCOS but I know for a lot of women , it is tough to get pregnant though many do . But is it to the point where you can get pregnant by sneezing ? Because that’s what it seems like with her . 

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(edited)
17 hours ago, Suzy Rhapsody said:

Wow, Catelynn really is a lazy-ass cow (who is shutting down her udders, pardon the pun).  How does she think employed women do this?!  She doesn’t have time?  She doesn’t have the energy?  Give me a break.  Maybe she needs another couple of weeks of pampering at adult day camp.

“I really need to go out after mommying for six days in a row.” That is almost a direct quote.” That is vile.

Edited by CarlaCupcakes
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16 hours ago, Maire said:

T&C let Nova sit in the kitchen counter and she tumbles off. Then they put the baby (?Veda?) in a sleeper with no barriers on the couch where she could easily tumble off🙄 

I too was shocked when I saw Nova sitting on the counter...honestly, I'm surprised there hasn't been a more serious accident with her. Tyler and Cate are idiots.

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16 hours ago, Chris Knight said:

Seriously. Towards what I thought was the end, I started looking at the Direct TV guide to see what to watch next. Turns out it was only 8:32 pm. Yyaawwnn....

Why is so Cheyenne so desperate to land a man ? She's pretty and very young, loads of time to shop around. 

Maci, Taylor is looking to his post-MTV days, and you may or may not be in his plans.  Dont push the  vasectomy. 

Did Cate go partying on a Tues night ? Not many people at that club. 

In all seriousness  can you feel your liver when its swollen or whatever term Amber used ? 

What Cheyenne has yet to learn is that the opposite of love isn't hate, it's indifference. And Corey is completely indifferent to whoever she decides to get with. She can move in with Matt, marry Matt and have all the babies she wants with Matt.  It will not make Corey jealous and it will not make Corey come running back.  He has had his time with her and his only concern about Cheyenne is what time to show up to her house so he doesn't miss any camera time. 

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19 minutes ago, kicksave said:

YES! OMG! She does NOTHING all day...she has never held a job and has nothing on her agenda except sitting on a couch or brushing a horse. Plus...she has a husband that hangs around the house all day and doesn't work. Has she ever heard of expressing her milk? Her excuses are just horrible..."it's hard", my nipples are sore, I can't go to therapy because I have to nurse her"...Also...the worst one "Well she got the most important stuff, the colostrum, at birth". My daughter in law had to go back to her full time job after four months at home and expressed her milk every night and bottled it for me and her mom to feed our grandson as we split babysitting duties for the first year of his life. When she got home from an 8-9 hour day at work, she nursed the baby, made dinner, bathed the baby and she and my son put him to bed and then she expressed milk while my son cleaned up the dinner dishes. And Cate cannot get her ample ass off the couch to express her milk? It was more important to quit nursing so she could go clubbing and drinking with her loser friends? 

The selfishness and immaturity of these two makes me nauseous. Both of them. Tyler has a newborn but runs off to Arizona to party with friends and Cate stops nursing to party with her friends. Don't go crying and whining about giving up Carly when you are 10 years older now and have the advantages of earning easy money , a home and family support in the area but still make choices that have a negative impact on your children. Carly was spared this trashy life...thankfully.

You said it best.  Your daughter-in-law, and other women like her, are amazing, just like the ones who try it for a while and decide that they can't fit it into their busy schedules, but pour their efforts into the other thousand little tasks that comprise motherhood!

Catelynn will have a truckload of excuses at every step of this "parenting journey."  They'll pile on top of each other and multiple like mold spores and eventually her girls(es) will figure out that she's a lazy sack of shit (with a terrible makeup artist) who is primarily looking out for number one.  The real loser in all of this will ultimately be her because she'll realize one day that she missed out on countless memory-making opportunities with them.  Oh well!  As long as she can hit the clubs with her girlfriends and take some more boob-grab selfies, right?

Edited by Suzy Rhapsody
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3 minutes ago, geauxaway said:

I’d like someone to sincerely ask Cate, what is it that you DO like / love about parenting?   She seems to bitch and moan about EVERY aspect of it.  

I have nothing more to add.  

Probably the network check she gets so she doesn't have to do anything!

Speaking of which if she and Tyler split would he be gone?  Maybe he likes the check too much to leave Cate.

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10 minutes ago, Jeanne222 said:

Probably the network check she gets so she doesn't have to do anything!

Speaking of which if she and Tyler split would he be gone?  Maybe he likes the check too much to leave Cate.

Never forget when Teen Mom orginally ended and Tyler left Cate to pursue "acting" in New Orleans.  He was GONE.  The only reason he came back to Cate was because Teen Mom OG rehashed the series.

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1 hour ago, Suzy Rhapsody said:

You said it best.  Your daughter-in-law, and other women like her, are amazing, just like the ones who try it for a while and decide that they can't fit it into their busy schedules, but pour their efforts into the other thousand little tasks that comprise motherhood!

Catelynn will have a truckload of excuses at every step of this "parenting journey."  They'll pile on top of each other and multiple like mold spores and eventually her girls(es) will figure out that she's a lazy sack of shit (with a terrible makeup artist) who is primarily looking out for number one.  The real loser in all of this will ultimately be her because she'll realize one day that she missed out on countless memory-making opportunities with them.  Oh well!  As long as she can hit the clubs with her girlfriends and take some more boob-grab selfies, right?

As a final note...I see Tyler yelling at people on Twitter and elsewhere to mind their own business and that criticizing their parenting is off limits. Really Tyler? If it angers you that much then QUIT THE SHOW! You and Cate chose to continue to do this show so please, spare us your indignation and faux outrage. If you truly cared so much about public commentary on your family and marriage you would grow a pair and quit the show, get a job or go back to school and live the private life you cannot have if you are on a reality TV show. You can’t have it both ways...and it might be a good idea to get off social media or limit it if you really want privacy. Posting goofy pics of yourself and Cate and commenting on other teen moms isn’t helping your kids.

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8 hours ago, FreetheGirlses said:

While Catelynn is lazy in general, I'm not going to judge another woman for stopping breastfeeding whenever they want. Truth be told, for many women, it is hard. 

Women are always judged when it comes to breastfeeding. So many other things to judge her for! 

No judgements from me on her quitting to breastfeed...however, her lame excuses sound fake to me especially when we see her a few nights later out partying and drinking. 

1 hour ago, Jeanne222 said:

Probably the network check she gets so she doesn't have to do anything!

Speaking of which if she and Tyler split would he be gone?  Maybe he likes the check too much to leave Cate.

They both like the check. It’s like MTV welfare $$$.

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I think the way Cate acts as a parent, is a direct reflection and result of the lack of nurturing and loving that she received as a child. We did not see her early childhood but we did see how awfully her mother treated her when she was pregnant. 

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20 hours ago, Suzy Rhapsody said:

Wow, Catelynn really is a lazy-ass cow (who is shutting down her udders, pardon the pun).  How does she think employed women do this?!  She doesn’t have time?  She doesn’t have the energy?  Give me a break.  Maybe she needs another couple of weeks of pampering at adult day camp.

She has an awful lot of time to get her hair and makeup done, considering she lives on (sort of) a farm and presumably is spending at least a little time in the stable.

And she needs to cut back several shades on her makeup.  She did continue it down her ample breastage, but every time a fishbelly arm approached the upper part of her body the difference in color was enough to send Amber into a panic attack.

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(edited)
11 hours ago, CarlaCupcakes said:

I wonder what the whole family thought when they found out their boy might be marrying Cheyenne and her trusty ever-present sister.

This relationship is just weird to me...it almost seems like a contrived MTV set up, like Matt auditioned for the role of boyfriend to Cheyenne. She needs to do something constructive with her life besides sitting around the house and whining about Cory. I don’t think she’s all THAT into Matt. And what is with her annoying sister? Where’s her baby daddy? I guess she doesn’t do anything all day either except hang around the house with Cheyenne with that shit eating grin on her face.

Edited by kicksave
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2 hours ago, Snarky McSnarky said:

I can't believe they filmed a whole segment on someone going and getting a blood test, and I REALLY can't believe I sat and watched it.

I know...what a drama queen. She can’t even get bloodwork done without dragging Andrew there. And why did that require a special car and driver? These girls are in for a huge wake up call when this show ends and the cameras are gone.

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16 hours ago, kicksave said:

As a final note...I see Tyler yelling at people on Twitter and elsewhere to mind their own business and that criticizing their parenting is off limits. Really Tyler? If it angers you that much then QUIT THE SHOW! You and Cate chose to continue to do this show so please, spare us your indignation and faux outrage. If you truly cared so much about public commentary on your family and marriage you would grow a pair and quit the show, get a job or go back to school and live the private life you cannot have if you are on a reality TV show. You can’t have it both ways...and it might be a good idea to get off social media or limit it if you really want privacy. Posting goofy pics of yourself and Cate and commenting on other teen moms isn’t helping your kids.

If it wasn't for this show Tyler would be working at Walmart, complaining about that  bitch who's after the shift manager job he wants.

These two really think they're role models. Let that sink in.

9 hours ago, Snarky McSnarky said:

I can't believe they filmed a whole segment on someone going and getting a blood test, and I REALLY can't believe I sat and watched it.

Its right up there with Amber and Andrew's segment on them driving around Los Angeles, getting lost. Jesus Christ.

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7 hours ago, kicksave said:

I know...what a drama queen. She can’t even get bloodwork done without dragging Andrew there. And why did that require a special car and driver? These girls are in for a huge wake up call when this show ends and the cameras are gone.

For some reason, this baffled me more than anything else in this episode. Why the in the hell did Amber and discount Oliver Platt need to take an Uber to go get a blood test? Where was baby James? 

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3 minutes ago, MaggieG said:

Why the in the hell did Amber and discount Oliver Platt need to take an Uber to go get a blood test? Where was baby James? 

Why in the hell did Cate need a stretch limo to pick up her friends at the trailer court? That whole partying segment was tacky AF.

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6 minutes ago, Mr. Minor said:

Why in the hell did Cate need a stretch limo to pick up her friends at the trailer court? That whole partying segment was tacky AF.

I forgot about that! The white stretch limo was so ridiculous. 

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I can't watch this show live because if I DVR and rewatch later it goes much quicker.  FF through all the Cheyenne segments.  Maci talking about PCOS - FF.  Amber talking about meds affecting her liver - FF.  Catelynn talking about breastfeeding - FF.  Except to note - nursing is HARD!  Especially with a newborn, your baby is attached to you more than it is not.  I remember feeling like my baby was literally sucking my life energy right out of my body.

I had to chuckle when I saw the stretch limo pull up in the trailer park.  Yeah, b*tches, keepin' it KLASSY!!!

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On ‎7‎/‎30‎/‎2019 at 9:25 AM, StatisticalOutlier said:

Amber discussing the findings to be expected from the test she was taking with the blood taker.  Who said it measured liver "emzymes."  But Amber's got one on me--I couldn't find my liver in my belly if you paid me. 

I had to rewind that.  I was like, why are you asking medical questions to the blood-taker??  She's not a doctor!  And then she said emzymes and I was like OH MY GOD.

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(edited)
2 hours ago, MaggieG said:

For some reason, this baffled me more than anything else in this episode. Why the in the hell did Amber and discount Oliver Platt need to take an Uber to go get a blood test? Where was baby James? 

And why did discount Oliver Platt (love that) have to go with her for a fucking blood test?  I'm telling you, there's some reason she will not allow him to be Home Alone.  Never does she go *anywhere* without dragging him (and usually James as well) along with her.

ETA:  My daughter took a seizure medication (Depakote) which required periodic blood test to check  liver enzymes.  Apparently doctors (and I would bet some patients) can tell if their livers are swollen; I also believe that alcoholics who are suffering from cirrhosis of the liver demonstrate a swelling of the liver which can be detected by the casual observer, if it is severe enough.  It can account for the puffy look some alcoholics have, without being actually fat.

And there is a condition called "fatty liver," which I bet is what Amber has been told she has.  That means you have to lose weight, and I doubt that she wants to advertise that fact to her fanz, since she loves her "curves" so much.

Edited by Mothra
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4 hours ago, Mr. Minor said:

Why in the hell did Cate need a stretch limo to pick up her friends at the trailer court? That whole partying segment was tacky AF.

The stretch limo was hilarious...these girls really think they are A list celebrities.

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2 hours ago, suzeecat said:

I can't watch this show live because if I DVR and rewatch later it goes much quicker.  FF through all the Cheyenne segments.  Maci talking about PCOS - FF.  Amber talking about meds affecting her liver - FF.  Catelynn talking about breastfeeding - FF.  Except to note - nursing is HARD!  Especially with a newborn, your baby is attached to you more than it is not.  I remember feeling like my baby was literally sucking my life energy right out of my body.

I had to chuckle when I saw the stretch limo pull up in the trailer park.  Yeah, b*tches, keepin' it KLASSY!!!

Nursing isn't for everyone but using that as excuse so you can hit the trailer trash club scene and get drunk is just as low as you can go.

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22 hours ago, Jeanne222 said:

Probably the network check she gets so she doesn't have to do anything!

Speaking of which if she and Tyler split would he be gone?  Maybe he likes the check too much to leave Cate.

They're all addicted to that MTV welfare check..and the celebrity and paid vacations...none of them have any incentive to get a job or continue their educations. Just sit on the couch or lie on the bed whining, crying, complaining and spending their MTV welfare checks on tattoos, new cars, designer bags and new houses. Remember when Tyler was going to go to college and get a degree in counseling so that he could help kids like himself who come from homes with a parent/parents with substance abuse issues? Awww...the good old days.

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21 hours ago, kicksave said:

No judgements from me on her quitting to breastfeed...however, her lame excuses sound fake to me especially when we see her a few nights later out partying and drinking. 

Agreed. It's just another thing Catelynn can't handle because it's "hard" or because of her "post partum". She just seems to use that as an excuse to abdicate her parenting role as often as she can. 

5 hours ago, Mr. Minor said:

Why in the hell did Cate need a stretch limo to pick up her friends at the trailer court? That whole partying segment was tacky AF.

That scene made me laugh so hard. Also seems like she's buying friends. 

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1 hour ago, kicksave said:

Remember when Tyler was going to go to college and get a degree in counseling so that he could help kids like himself who come from homes with a parent/parents with substance abuse issues? Awww...the good old days.

The good old days would have to include way back at the beginning, when there was a link on TWOP to give money to help those two kids achieve their college dreams, and people donated!

.

4 hours ago, heatherchandler said:

I had to rewind that.  I was like, why are you asking medical questions to the blood-taker??  She's not a doctor!  And then she said emzymes and I was like OH MY GOD.

I rewound it four or five times so I could read her lips because I didn't want to go off half-cocked, and it was definitely an M and not an N--she closed her lips and that's an M.  The captions generously said "enzymes."

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I too can't fault Catelynn for wanting to stop breastfeeding, but she really didn't need to protest so much.  She and Tyler talk a good fight about not caring what anyone else thinks, but that's hogwash.

Plenty of women just plain don't want to breastfeed, or get tired of breastfeeding after giving it a try, and there's no shame in it.  My husband bought me a bottle of champagne to celebrate our son's first bottle.  And I didn't feel I needed to justify my decision--it wasn't "hard" or "painful," and it didn't keep me from drinking (in moderation) (in fact, the wise old women told me a good, frothy dark beer every day with lunch would make my milk better for the baby!).  I just was tired of feeling like my body wasn't my own.  I loved my son dearly and wanted the best for him, but it wasn't going to be best for him to have a crabby mother.

So shut up, Catelynn.  No one cares half as much as you think they do.

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