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  1. Ava looking fabulous, killing Sonny and Carly with kindness, holding all the cards in her hands, and basking in a renewed sense of confidence is everything I ever wanted for her. It won't last long, the show won't allow it to, but damn if I'm not going to relish the moment while I can. Maura plays the cat that ate the canary mood to perfection, I love her so much. And Carly realizing that Ava has the upper hand, and being unable to handle that? Christmas just came early.
  2. I feel like I missed something with Peter's scenes today; why bother with the secrecy of disposing evidence of a shooting he just admitted to? He told Anna a reasonably believable story of how he shot Andre's attacker, so why take the effort to wipe his prints clean? And if he's going to destroy evidence, he probably shouldn't pick a trash can located just down the hall from where the crime was committed. Am I being stupid here or does this just not make sense? Valentin walking into the Metro Court and seeing Griffin, Jax, Maxie, and Laura and choosing to NOPE right the hell back out of there was my laugh for the day. And bless Jax's heart for having to listen to the Claudette story for the first time and not visibly wincing at its awfulness. I really hope the Claudette mention was a one-off and we're not going to revisit her in any further detail, because my interest in that is nonexistent. I can't help myself, I'm totally into an Ava and Nina partnership. I know it'll likely all go south eventually due to Nina's inability to fully quit Valentin, but for right now, I'm all in. Nina seemed so sincere when she apologized to Ava, and I've always wanted more people on Ava's side, so I need them to defy the odds and actually get one over on the Cassadine men.
  3. Uh, did Nikolas really just bribe that Shadybrook employee to tamper Ava's meds with only a couple of $20 bills? A) Way to dig deep into your pockets there, Mr. Cassadine, B) wow, that employee is very easily bought, and C) Ava needs to get back to full strength ASAP to rip Nik a new one for messing with her mind like that. Nikolas has been such a tremendous disappointment; luring Ava into further vulnerability with talk of her dead daughter in hell is really heinous. Carly's blunt, demanding, rough as a cob bedside manner when talking to Lucas was hilariously on-brand for her. Maybe let's not try bullying the guy with a head injury into waking up, okay? I'm already so over Julian muttering about his failed plan to take out Brad. Both because it's annoying, and because it's a sudden, unwelcome reversal of behavior from a character I had grown to appreciate.
  4. Remind me never to have a wreck in PC, as that was the shoddiest first response team I've ever seen. If Kendra died mere minutes after impact, then the same could be true of Brad and Lucas, and yet everyone was just strolling around the crash scene like there's no rush to check the other vehicle. Come on, now. There had to be a better way to give us Julian's "oh no, LUCAS" moment that wasn't so totally idiotic and contrived. I liked Sasha and Willow's girl talk talk today, even if Willow is too old and experienced to act so chagrined over purchasing and taking a pregnancy test. Whatever; it was a Sonny-free zone, and that's good enough for me. Plus, Willow is likeable and there's no paternity doubts here, so if she's pregnant I won't be mad. It pains me so much that Curtis had to ask SONNY of all people for marriage advice. To be fair, by PC standards Sonny and Carly really ARE the old faithful married couple that keep on chuggin'. Still, though, it's just another sign that on this show, everyone has to pay fealty to Sonny, and between Curtis, Kristina, and Alexis today, we were drowning in Sonny's undue praises.
  5. Aw, don't you feel all warm and cozy watching Sonny and Carly describing the Quartermaines' "bizarre" Thanksgiving traditions? Warm and cozy because this is hell, right here, having A.J.'s murderer and co-conspirator of the destruction of his life titter about the Quartermaine family like they're old pals. Seriously, GH? This is one of those times we could have just NOT seen or heard from the Corinthos family (radical thought, I know). The Quartermaine scenes felt particularly half-assed to me, sadly. I was worried about Franco's inclusion and he turned out to be a total nonentity. Monica's quick-thinking shenanigans were all well and good, but I was annoyed by Lulu and Brook Lynn's instant cat fight (how old are you ladies again?). Even the song felt perfunctory and rushed. I swear to god, if this car accident leaves Lucas concussed or otherwise unable to remember that Brad fucking FINALLY dropped the truth about Wiley, I'm gonna...well, I'm just going to continue to complain about it here ad nauseam. Seriously, they've set up a genuinely dramatic moment here, with both the baby reveal and the fate of Lucas and Brad's relationship, and if they just wind up resetting everything I'm going to be so disappointed.
  6. Today's storylines as components of a Thanksgiving meal: The Corinthos gang/Sonny's paaiiin: the turkey. Dull and dry, yet it impossibly remains the centerpiece of the table year after fucking year. Brad/Lucas/Wiley: canned cranberry sauce. Nobody much likes it and its expiration date is questionable, but it somehow still keeps getting served. Alexis/Kendra/Neil: green bean casserole. A largely unappetizing throwback dish that is only slightly redeemed by its crunchy onion topping (in this case, Neil). Finn/Violet: pumpkin pie. It's honestly not that remarkable, and there are definitely better pies out there, but it's sweet and dependable. Liz/Franco: a roll, chucked onto your plate at the last minute only because you had some space to fill, and not necessarily because you wanted it. It's Thanksgiving and you will gorge yourself, dammit. Happy Thanksgiving, guys! I hope however you're spending your day, it's a good one.
  7. What exactly was the intended message of Nina's circular conversation with Jax? "I'm not actually marrying Valentin because he's an incorrigible liar and I want to break his heart EXCEPT maybe I won't because I love him and he's family." Fucking WHAT? You can't simultaneously sell me that Nina knows her worth and knows Valentin is beneath her while also having her pathetically admit she'd take him back because it's easy. Seriously, the only thing I'm clear on here is that Jax for damn sure shouldn't have to wait around as a second choice while Nina wrestles through this stuff. Hoo boy, Sonny left no box unchecked in his fight with Carly. Palpable insecurity over Jason (!) and Jax? Yep. Playing the poor, innocent victim? You betcha. Displacing all blame for marital discord onto Carly, with a healthy side of slut shaming? Oh, abso-fucking-lutely. But Sonny's dad is SICK and that means we should all feel sorry for him instead of holding him accountable for his behavior, right, show?? LMAO at Monica offering her home to Scout and Danny because after all, "the kids do spend an awful lot of time here." 'Bout damn time they acknowledged the pesky truth that these kids have never spent much time with their parents. Points to Jason for turning down Monica (for now at least) and stepping up to have a hard discussion with his son. If the show really wants to impress me, though, Jason needs to consistently parent going forward instead of continuing to give the kids the out of sight, out of mind treatment.
  8. Y'all. My heart started swelling at the sight of tiny Chidi persuading his parents not to divorce ("Where would I keep my books?" he ponders, bless him), was close to bursting at the montage of his lifetimes spent with Eleanor (flirty kisses, sweet cuddling, and impassioned arguing, give me ALL OF THE ABOVE), and by the time we got to the note, I think my heart cartwheeled right out of my chest in the splendor of the moment. So simple, yet so right. There's never going to be an "answer." Life (afterlife) is messy, with a billion variables constantly in flux. One clear route just does not exist. But for Chidi, there's an Eleanor. Someone who listens and learns from him, and at the same time gently pushes him out of his comfort zone and into something a little less ordered, yet boundlessly rewarding. A soul mate that was both made and found. And that's an answer all to its own, and it's the only answer Chidi will ever need.
  9. Yesss, we're back to regular programming in the U.S. today! The interrupted GH schedule has reminded me that despite my many (many) complaints about the show, I rely on it being in my daily life. There's comfort in tuning in for dumb-fuck GH shenanigans five days out of seven, I guess. Case in point: Nikolas continuing his streak of stunning idiocy by hotfooting it to Wyndemere and immediately getting caught by Charlotte. I know Nik won't hurt Charlotte and was just trying to cover his tracks, but making deals with a child and swearing her to secrecy is never, ever a good look. Jason, essentially: "Ah, shit, you mean these minor kids who call me Dad are going to put a damper on my criminal activity? Son of a bitch." Somewhere, Drew's ghost is scoffing and throwing his hands up in the air, because when he came to this conclusion over two years ago everyone acted like he was insane. Now that the idea is sanctioned by Carly, suddenly it's a different story. Funny how that happens. I need 100% more Chase/Finn brotherly chats and 100% less of Hayden judging Anna and acting as if there's any tenable parallel between Robin's childhood and Violet's. I'm legit proud of Anna for maintaining her cool, calmly shutting that shit down, and laying it out for Hayden that she knows exactly what's up. Hayden's play for space in Finn's heart is entirely transparent, and even if it weren't, Anna is nobody's fool. Even if she doesn't feel Hayden could seriously threaten her and Finn's relationship, she's smart enough to know she can't let Hayden's behavior slide by without calling it out for what it is: shameless and insidious. ("Are you still engaged? Time passes, feelings change." Girl, please.)
  10. I adored this so much I can't do much right now except flail about how perfect every detail was. Eleanor calling Tahani her best friend! Jason doing cannonballs (going out of the world as he came in it)! Tahani in sweatpants for the very first (and probably last) time! "We're glue." "I don't think any of you is using that right." Eleanor gripping Chidi's hand at the threat of annihilation! Bad Janet coming through and joining the fight to save humanity! DISCO JANET! Every week we get one step closer to this show's conclusion, and crafting an episode around the funerals of the main characters felt cathartic in a way. These awesome, quirky, one-of-a-kind characters are what has made The Good Place so successful. Sure, everyone buzzes over the twist moments, but it's the heart and the humanity contained within Eleanor, Chidi, Tahani, Jason, Janet, and Michael that makes this show exceptional. We can believe that "people improve when they can get external love and support" and "no one is beyond rehabilitation" because we've been on that journey with these characters for four years now. They're embodied those concepts. They've talked the talk, walked the walk, and changed in extraordinary ways. And self-improvement is hard work, made easier with teammates, but it's feasible. That's a message we need now more than ever. The "Ya Dead" banner in the background of Eleanor's funeral was maybe my favorite touch of the entire episode. Of all the legacies this show has gifted us, it's top-notch signage game cannot be overlooked.
  11. Sonny...being NICE...to Ava?!? Engaging in genuine conversation with no snide undertones?? Like an actual human capable of compassion? Honestly, this act of kindness will probably only result in him coming down twice as hard on Jax when he catches wind of the Nik stuff. Gotta recoup those asshole points, after all. I tune out immediately when Joss starts wading in her bottomless fountain of grief for Oscar. We've spent an endless amount of time on her being emo and in comparison we still barely know anything about Trina. Trina seems smart, cool, and seems to sincerely care about Ava, and I really would like the show to give her more presence. How unsurprising that the show's pulling a classic "it's not what it looks like!" routine with Anna walking in on Finn and Hayden. And yeah, Finn didn't cheat, and no, I don't blame him for waiting until he saw Anna in person to explain Violet. But Finn absolutely shouldn't have let Hayden wander around Anna's house half-dressed, and I definitely don't respect Hayden's overt play for an engaged man. Anna may claim to not feel threatened, but I want to see her assert herself and not allow any room for Hayden to wriggle in between her and Finn.
  12. My most fervent hope after watching this spectacle is for TLC to show Matthew's punk ass the door and not let him participate in another season of the show. It was bad enough for him to cuss out Hailey and her mom (and then he sat there staring at the floor--boy, if you're going to use those words, be man enough to hold your head up like you mean them). But bucking up against Ananda and claiming this was HIS show? Nah, dude, you're there by TLC's grace alone, and you sure as shit ain't some star worthy of the ego you tote around. The only possible good that might come out of Matthew's Unexpected involvement is that he's shown America what a scrawny loser he is and that could hopefully deter another girl from procreating with him. Two children from this dude (that he'll likely never raise) is more than enough. Oh, Hailey 2, sure must be hard to be stuck in a messy situation where everyone hates you. All you did was insert yourself into your friend's relationship, lie about it to her, steal her man, and then brag about your wonderful passionate feelings for Matthew which trump everything else, including his daughter. Keep crying, girl, it'll be good practice for whenever Matthew inevitably walks out on you and your little "family."
  13. Lucas, Tony and Bobbie were a much-needed emotional highlight today. A lot of the show right now is frustrating and/or nonsensical, and taking this detour down the connection of the Jones family was a nice reminder that there is still some heart to be found. "I'm crazy but I'm not CRAZY!" God, I love Ava. Of course she saw through to Jax's goal, though I think Jax is decent enough that he meant it when he said he felt bad about Ava's predicament. But first and foremost he was there fishing for information, and he needed to be called out for it. So now Lulu is gonna be so enthralled with conversation about Peter's wardrobe that she's going to miss a strange woman talking to her child? Jesus, this is dumb. She's sitting facing Charlotte's direction, she ought to be able to see the Cassandra interaction. Lulu rightly takes a lot of shit for her reporting skills, but she's always been an involved mom, and I find it hard to believe that even Girl Reporter wouldn't keep a closer eye on her kid. (Also, nice job, Nik, letting this loony escape so she can sink her claws in your NIECE. I'm seriously so unimpressed with him.)
  14. Damn, combining the implosion of Chidi/Simone AND Eleanor's experiment in one episode was pretty brutal. The contrast in Simone and Chidi's handling of the situation--Simone, grasping for data and the truth, and Chidi, looking for a foothold of human connection--makes perfect sense for both characters, and is the exact reason they're not as compatible as Chidi so believed. Chidi can understand Simone's decision not to help Brent, but he'll never agree with it. Doesn't matter if Brent has failed a thousand chances to be a better person, he's still a person in need, and Chidi's still going to extend a hand and hope that Brent will eventually reflect that kindness back on him. (And I, too, hope we're finally going to get past Brent's amped up toxic ego and find something real.) I really loved Michael's (and Eleanor's!) maniacal laugh at the Bad Place reveal; it wasn't quite sinister, but still effectively off-putting. And Magician Michael (or excuse me, the Magnificent Dr. Presto) was just a delight. It's so great how mundane stuff from the human world is so alluring to Michael. "We hope that our early successes make up for the embarrassing mess we've become. Like Facebook. Or America." Just gonna let that stand without comment. Jason got to make coherent, insightful contributions in this episode! Football analogies, sure, but it still counts! I don't know what to expect as we close out the end of this crazy ride, but I know I can't wait to see how everything's going to be wrapped up. (Can y'all believe it's almost over? Watching The Good Place feels like getting a hug every week, and I'm going to miss that.)
  15. Violet's a cute kid and all, but I'll admit I'm bitter that she's already been more visible and social in her few weeks of GH existence than Scout has been her entire life. Hayden's not sly, using intimate photos of Violet's life to reel Finn in, and as much as I love Robert, him jeering Finn and Anna's relationship isn't the best use of his time. Good for Scott for trying yet again to get through to "Drew" and remind him that Franco's identity and journey are no less important than his own. And it still hurts to hear Kim say that "her Drew came back" when the real Drew, the one that gave life to Oscar and loved him in his last days, is (likely) gone forever. Imagine if instead of Alexis being confined to a hospital bed and brushing clumps of hair out of her head, she were involved in this newly spun web surrounding Nikolas. All the pieces are there; she's Nik's aunt, Valentin's sister, Cassandra's lawyer (not that that means much now that she's stuck at GH), and she and Laura formed a connection during the onset of Laura's entry into politics. There's no reason in the world for Alexis to be sitting curbside for this splashy, back-from-the-dead return, except, I guess, that the show thinks it's better to once again torture her physically and relitigate her crimes of nearly a decade ago.
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