S04.E11: Kicked To The Curb

[antfitz]

On 7/2/2019 at 12:48 PM, antfitz said:

 OMG no spin off for Chantel and pedro. I can't stand him in its conniving family, and I cannot stand her for putting up with it and saying she loves him. She makes American women look stupid.... Right up there with noelle .  Then there is the Elizabeth and that half head Russian or whatever he is. 

 I absolutely agree. good on all points.

[heatherchandler]

1 hour ago, Angry Moldolvian said:

True Story: many many moons ago my friends mum caught her with a bottle of Jim Beam hidden in the closet. Instead of confronting her with the evidence she refilled it with weak cold tea. As we were getting ready for the party we each took a swig and were horrified by the taste. My friends mum had the ultimate gotcha moment and no party for us. This was circa 1989. I just don’t buy bad boy dough boy chugging hard liquor with such ease, I refuse to believe he wouldn’t splutter it up. If it was hard liquor he’s seasoned just like Debs

I guess you are not around a lot of alcoholics!  I have seen many people chug Jack like that, without missing a beat.  And that was college!  I couldn't do it, but that doesn't mean it can't be done!  

I think Coltee is an alcoholicee and probably regularly chugs like that to off-set his miserable life.

1 minute ago, magemaud said:

I've always thought it was against the law to show people on TV drinking real alcohol and they usually use iced tea to represent brownish liquors. 

It's not against the law - look at basically ALL reality tv - Jersey Shore, Real Housewives, etc. they are all drinking A LOT.  No one is faking that. 

[antfitz]

On 7/3/2019 at 6:23 AM, Brooklynista said:

Clutch my pearls! The mouth on Debbie. Does she kiss her cat with that mouth? 

I think Debbie saw that Colt was unfulfilled in their relationship and agreed to him bringing in a sex partner. Her jealousy over Larissa consumed her in a way she could never have anticipated.  Debbie is going mad and completely losing her cool. Also, does Debbie have a lisp or just not wearing her teeth?

I'm convinced Chantel cannot read and that's why she has so much trouble delivering her lines. And I cannot stand this reality show habit of over confronting. Chantel told Pedro what Obed said about the beginnings of their relationship.  Pedro denied it and professed his love. Done. Why does she now need to go confront Mama Pedro and Nicole? Let it go and take your man home. Ugh!

Nah,  Leave the man in the DR

[nytonc]

Pow will drag that miscarriage around with her for the rest of her life. I’m sure she’ll throw it up to Axel when he gets older. She’ll eventually find a way to blame it on her mother-in-law. Rust will be in the corner saying WE had a miscarriage. 

I know a miscarriage is traumatic. I had one. But I hate Pow and everything she thinks, says, does and stands for. 

For once I agree with Aaaannnnddddrei. When did having the entire family in the birthing room become a thing? When I had my kids (years ago)it was just me and their dad. I wouldn’t want a huge audience staring at my vagina. I’m surprised there was room for the baby with her whole family up her ass constantly. 

Chantal & Pedro yawn

Trashley ugh

Will Coltie & Dobbie finally decide to divorce Larissa?

Edited July 8, 2019 by nytonc

[antfitz]

On 7/3/2019 at 11:48 AM, iwasish said:

Chantel is like a dog with a bone. She is now going to see Pedro’s family and ask them about what Obed said. She professes to believe Pedro, but then goes looking for proof that he is lying. Are we supposed to really believe she doesn’t care if her meeting Pedro was a setup as long as “WE REALLY FELL IN LOVE”? 

 Pedro no more fell in love with her than I did.

[shockermolar]

12 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

outside of situations where your family of origin is abusive or toxic (which you’d want to be rid of them anyway), I don’t think it’s a good idea to alienate them because your spouse demands it. 1. Why would your spouse want to do that yo people that love you? 2. Sounds emotionally abusive to me (this goes both ways). 

I don't much like Mr. Shockermolar's family but then I'm not head over heels for my own either. Many moons ago I just stopped interacting with his family. I've been very clear that he is welcome to see and be with them and take our kids (who are now baby adults) to family events and holidays, and do whatever, and I certainly support him during difficult times (his mother's death, etc.), but frankly life's too short to have grit my teeth and be someone I am not in order to spend time people with whom I have little in common and who hold beliefs with which I fundamentally disagree. I do not limit or prevent him or our sons from being members of his family, but I don't have to be just because they are. 

[antfitz]

12 hours ago, iwasish said:

Larissa is a bitch. I think even her attorney sensed it. He pretty much told her, watch your temper or you may find yourself heading back to Brazil.

She wasnt even in the country a couple weeks and expecting access to money, credit cards etc. Demanding an expensive car, bigger house etc. Take me shopping, compliment me constantly. She knew within a couple weeks that it was not what she was looking for. Sit down with Colt and tell him, this isn’t going to work for me. I’m sorry but I don’t want to waste your time or money. 

There are women who would have been more than happy to be in the situation Larissa found herself. 

Having to sit next to Larissa, with her constant primping and ever present cellphone, chauffeuring her around,,,, I’d have put her out of the car too. She was luck Debbie stopped the car first. I would barely have slowed down. 

 "There are women who would have been more than happy to be in Larissa's position?"  Who are these women and get them an education.  Any woman who would want to settle for a fat slob, living with his mother, sharing a checking account with his mother, sharing a car with his mother, should have her head examined.  The fact that Debbie cries when considering living separately from him, shows what a sick relationship this is.

Edited July 8, 2019 by antfitz

[Bryce Lynch]

24 minutes ago, magemaud said:

I've always thought it was against the law to show people on TV drinking real alcohol and they usually use iced tea to represent brownish liquors. 

I think that regulation pertains to TV advertisements of alcohol.  They can show people holding a beer, glass of wine or shot of whisky in an ad, but they can't show them drinking it, whether it is real or a non-alcoholic substitute. 

It is fairly common to see people drinking on food/cooking/travel shows, and I know they have shown challenges involving drinking alcoholic beverage on The Amazing Race.  Lots of Survivor contestants have also gotten plastered at the merge feast or during reward challenges.  

I would imagine that on scripted shows, the booze is almost always fake, but that is because they don't want the actors to get smashed doing numerous takes.  

Edited July 8, 2019 by Bryce Lynch

[antfitz]

9 minutes ago, nytonc said:

Pow will drag that miscarriage around with her for the rest of her life. I’m sure she’ll throw it up to Axel when he gets older. She’ll eventually find a way to blame it on her mother-in-law. Rust will be in the corner saying WE had a miscarriage. 

I know a miscarriage is traumatic. I had one. But I hate Pow and everything she thinks, says, does and stands for. 

For once I agree with Aaaannnnddddrei. When did having the entire family in the birthing room become a thing? When I had my kids (years ago)it was just me and their dad. I wouldn’t want a huge audience staring at my vagina. I’m surprised there was room for the baby with her whole family up her ass constantly. 

Chantal & Pedro yawn

Trashley ugh

Will Coltie & Dobbie finally decide to divorce Larissa?

 Will coltie and Debbie ever divorce?

[Bryce Lynch]

On 7/3/2019 at 7:23 AM, Brooklynista said:

Clutch my pearls! The mouth on Debbie. Does she kiss her cat with that mouth? 

I think Debbie saw that Colt was unfulfilled in their relationship and agreed to him bringing in a sex partner. Her jealousy over Larissa consumed her in a way she could never have anticipated.  Debbie is going mad and completely losing her cool. Also, does Debbie have a lisp or just not wearing her teeth?

I'm convinced Chantel cannot read and that's why she has so much trouble delivering her lines. And I cannot stand this reality show habit of over confronting. Chantel told Pedro what Obed said about the beginnings of their relationship.  Pedro denied it and professed his love. Done. Why does she now need to go confront Mama Pedro and Nicole? Let it go and take your man home. Ugh!

The thing about Pedro is that he gave more of a deflection than a straight up denial.   It wasn't, "Absolutely not!  There is no truth to that at all!"  It was more like "And you believe that?" "Why would you believe Obed?"  

If he had come right out and immediately denied it, I'd be less suspicious.

Debbie and Coltee have their issues, but Larissa is simply a horrible human being.  She would find fault with Coltee's mother, no matter how wonderful she was. Coltee and Larissa are both rather gross and there is no good reason for them to have any sort of relationship (other than Larissa's dream of a green card and Coltee's fantasy of green card sex).  

[b2H]

14 hours ago, GladysCravits said:

Is Pao out of her mind?  She’s acting like she was raised in a cave.  Her mother In law can’t hold her baby?   It’s Russ’s baby too.  She’s making herself look horrible and stupid.  

First time parents are that way.  As she gets more comfortable with the role of being a mom, she will relent.  I'm not surprised by any of this 'mama bear' behavior.  I'm also not impressed.

[Bryce Lynch]

2 minutes ago, b2H said:

First time parents are that way.  As she gets more comfortable with the role of being a mom, she will relent.  I'm not surprised by any of this 'mama bear' behavior.  I'm also not impressed.

Yes.  I am much more willing to forgive Paola's obnoxious overprotective mother act than most other bad behavior we see on this show.  It is wrong, but somewhat understandable.  

[BravoAddict72]

I cannot stand Pao! I understand part of where she is coming from. I had a miscarriage right before we had our son so maybe I was a bit overprotective because of it. But I let family members hold him! It's not like Russ's mom is showing up to take the baby home to OK for a weeks visit alone! She is staying in the same house. Then she lied to her witch of a mother. I noticed how she didn't mention that she came down to breakfast in her underwear. Or she was 2 hours late for the shower. I don't care what she says her culture is, all cultures have respect. I hope Russ's mom slaps some sense into both Pao and her mother.

Larissa needs to STFU! She almost went deaf from Debbie slamming the car door? Why is she always accusing Debbie of slamming doors? I get it, I had the worst MIL and couldn't stand her. But I knew yelling at my husband about her and calling her names wasn't going to get him on my side. I would just calmly explain in a nice way how I was feeling and bit my tongue while we were around her, which luckily wasn't too often.

[Scarlett45]

44 minutes ago, shockermolar said:

I don't much like Mr. Shockermolar's family but then I'm not head over heels for my own either. Many moons ago I just stopped interacting with his family. I've been very clear that he is welcome to see and be with them and take our kids (who are now baby adults) to family events and holidays, and do whatever, and I certainly support him during difficult times (his mother's death, etc.), but frankly life's too short to have grit my teeth and be someone I am not in order to spend time people with whom I have little in common and who hold beliefs with which I fundamentally disagree. I do not limit or prevent him or our sons from being members of his family, but I don't have to be just because they are. 

Makes sense to me. 

[greekmom]

3 hours ago, winsomeone said:

These days, lots of grown, unmarried children live with their parents. They can't make it on their own. That doesn't mean they have sex with each other. I don't see Debbie being physically overly friendly with Colt? I think it is nasty to keep saying they are lovers. They are two people who benefit financially from living together at this point in their lives period. Larrissa is a total bitch and I really doubt any mother would like her or get a long with her period.

While I understand your point, it's not just the fact that they live together.  It's the fact that they are really co-dependent on each other, comments from Coltee to Debbie "you look cute" and their interaction with each other. 

While we can never know for 100% sure if it is a sexual relationship (only people who can confirm that is Colt, Debbie, possibly Larissa and the walls in the house) what I can safely say is that Colt and Debbie have a more unhealthy relationship than your typical mother/son relationships.

I don't care about Pao & Roos or Chantel and Pedro.

As for Trashley and Skinz Jr.  If she met him when he was 17 and had a relationship with him since then, regardless of the consent age in Jamaica, in my opinion that's grooming.  Regardless of the combo (older man/younger woman or older woman/younger man) in my opinion it is not a healthy relationship and the addition of the inbalance of power (one holding the green card).  If Trashley had any common sense she wouldn't have even accepted Skinz Jr's advances if that was the case or made advances towards him.

[Bryce Lynch]

Best line of the night goes to (hiccup) Ralissa.  

"She's a wolfee in sheep skin."   

[iwasish]

45 minutes ago, antfitz said:

 "There are women who would have been more than happy to be in Larissa's position?"  Who are these women and get them an education.  Any woman who would want to settle for a fat slob, living with his mother, sharing a checking account with his mother, sharing a car with his mother, should have her head examined.  The fact that Debbie cries when considering living separately from him, shows what a sick relationship this is.

 Lot of Larissa’s problems are her own fault. She feels she was lied to and came here thinking things were much different than they turned out to be. If that is so then she had 90 days to decide if she wanted to get married and stay despite the circumstances. I don’t think her life in Brazil was all that hard. Seems that she had many of the same issues there that she has here. She has a lousy personality and seems to think she’s entitled to a lifestyle that is unrealistic. If she wanted to be kept in style by some rich guy, she was fishing in the wrong pool. As I’ve said before, once she realized she didn’t like the dynamics, no one was keeping her locked up. Go  back to Brazil and start over. 

And yes there are women who would have come over from an impoverished country and been happy to share a home  with their fiancés parent, share the family car etc. Larissa’s mistake was her attitude, entitled and bitchy, from the moment she got off the plane... “where are my flowers?”

[Bryce Lynch]

9 minutes ago, greekmom said:

While I understand your point, it's not just the fact that they live together.  It's the fact that they are really co-dependent on each other, comments from Coltee to Debbie "you look cute" and their interaction with each other. 

While we can never know for 100% sure if it is a sexual relationship (only people who can confirm that is Colt, Debbie, possibly Larissa and the walls in the house) what I can safely say is that Colt and Debbie have a more unhealthy relationship than your typical mother/son relationships.

I don't care about Pao & Roos or Chantel and Pedro.

As for Trashley and Skinz Jr.  If she met him when he was 17 and had a relationship with him since then, regardless of the consent age in Jamaica, in my opinion that's grooming.  Regardless of the combo (older man/younger woman or older woman/younger man) in my opinion it is not a healthy relationship and the addition of the inbalance of power (one holding the green card).  If Trashley had any common sense she wouldn't have even accepted Skinz Jr's advances if that was the case or made advances towards him.

I'm not sure what Trashley did is considered "grooming".  She didn't form a non-sexual, mentor relationship with an underage boy, with the intent to manipulate it into a sexual one.  She met an of age guy in Jamaica, screwed him and decided to bring him to the US and marry him.   

I know a some people accused David of "grooming" Evelyn online, as well.  But, I think if you wait until the person is above the age of consent, it really isn't grooming.  

Also, while Trashley did try use Jay's status to get even, by getting him deported, I don't really see that sort of imbalance of power.  

Jay was looking for a mark to marry him and get him a green card, and found one in Trashley.  He wasn't some naive boy who was seduced by the charms of an older, foreign woman, and fell madly in love with her and became her sex slave.   He has been looking for women online and screwing them in the bathroom since their sham marriage began.

Trashley is a moron, but she is not a sex predator.      

[RealReality]

I think it's a vast imbalance of power to bring someone to the US who is poor and from an impoverished country with few opportunities and then hold citizenship and a better life over their head and then constantly threaten to take it away if they don't "behave."

Ashley knew exactly what she was doing.  I used Lucy and the football and that's exactly what it is.  She made it a point to keep jay financially dependent on her and in a position where she could yank the rug out from under him if he didn't "behave". And that is not a relationship of equals. 

She had no intention of sending in that adjustment of status paperwork unless absolutely forced.  

Edited July 8, 2019 by RealReality

[MajorNelson]

Jay walks bowlegged

Debbie has a pottie mouth, and longs to be again the only woman in Coltee's life.

Chantel: I still cant stand her slow monotone talk

Libby - we come back from commercial, and surprise the baby is out!

MotherLibby got in the delivery room after all, and for a moment, all those idiots had peace.  Slight chance of thawing relations.

MommaPedro says "Chantel is just as ignorant as her family."

Las Vegas: The screen is fixed.

Colt - "My mother is a sweetheart."

Colt - "She has infinite patience" (so Larissa must have done something)
    Yes, she bought up you and her having your own house without Debbie.

Colt - guzzling that Jack!  😮

Larissa - accuses Colt and Debbie of being lovers.

Felt sad over Ashley and Jay marriage ending, the signing, and the way Jay was treated, even though I know neither of these people should have married in the first place.

Edited July 8, 2019 by MajorNelson

[MajorNelson]

Also, I don't like the production cheapness where at the beginning of the episode they show us a "coming up" 2 MINUTE preview which they used at the end of the previous episode.  (Or bits shown throughout the week)

[Bryce Lynch]

6 minutes ago, RealReality said:

I think it's a vast imbalance of power to bring someone to the US who is poor and from an impoverished country with few opportunities and then hold citizenship and a better life over their head and then constantly threaten to take it away if they don't "behave."

Ashley knew exactly what she was doing.  I used Lucy and the football and that's exactly what it is.  She made it a point to keep jay financially dependent on her and in a position where she could yank the rug out from under him if he didn't "behave". And that is not a relationship not equals. 

She had no intention of sending in that adjustment of status paperwork unless absolutely forced.  

I disagree.  Jay knew exactly what he was doing and was trying to scam a green card out of her while screwing everything that moved. 

Trashely, foolishly thought Jay was actually going to be a faithful husband and sex partner to her.  When she saw this wasn't happening, she (uncharacteristically wisely) decided not hold off on filing his paperwork, and later decided to divorce him.   

Nobody who realizes they have been tricked into a fake marriage for a green card should feel obligated to stay married and help the scammer become naturalized.

This is way different from a situation where someone brings someone over from an impoverished country and then holds the green card over their head, while the person is expecting a real marriage and is trying to be a good spouse.  

[magemaud]

1 hour ago, Bryce Lynch said:

2 hours ago, magemaud said:

I've always thought it was against the law to show people on TV drinking real alcohol and they usually use iced tea to represent brownish liquors. 

I think that regulation pertains to TV advertisements of alcohol.  They can show people holding a beer, glass of wine or shot of whisky in an ad, but they can't show them drinking it, whether it is real or a non-alcoholic substitute. 


You’re absolutely right. That law just applies to commercials. I’m sure Ashley hasn’t been fake drinking all that wine. 

[RealReality]

1 minute ago, Bryce Lynch said:

I disagree.  Jay knew exactly what he was doing and was trying to scam a green card out of her while screwing everything that moved. 

Trashely, foolishly thought Jay was actually going to be a faithful husband and sex partner to her.  When she saw this wasn't happening, she (uncharacteristically wisely) decided not hold off on filing his paperwork, and later decided to divorce him.   

Nobody who realizes they have been tricked into a fake marriage for a green card should feel obligated to stay married and help the scammer become naturalized.

This is way different from a situation where someone brings someone over from an impoverished country and then holds the green card over their head, while the person is expecting a real marriage and is trying to be a good spouse.  

Knowing that there is a power differential doesn't make it any less so.

Being in a position of being so impoverished that you have to seek out life in another country or have to "scam" an opportunity at a better life out of someone doesn't it make it any less a power differential.

The only thing that makes it a power differential is that one party holds all the power and the other doesn't.  In this situation Ashley held all the power and held it over Jay's head.

His behavior doesn't change tha nature of the vast power imbalance.

And I don't think she ever had any intention of filing that paperwork.  She didn't find out about Jay's tinder exploits until well after she was married.  Which means that she didn't come home thinking he was faithful and filed the adjustment of status, which is what she would have done if she had the intention of doing it.

Instead she sat on it and then had an excuse not to file it.  But she would have always come up with a "reason" why she held off no matter what jay did.  She would have started a fight, she would have nitpicked, she would have found SOMETHING because she had no intention of giving up her power over jay.

And this may be a reason why her prior relationships failed.  She didn't have anything to hold over them so she didn't feel secure.  They were contemporaries not dependents.

[Bryce Lynch]

15 minutes ago, MajorNelson said:

Jay walks bowlegged

Debbie has a pottie mouth, and longs to be again the only woman in Coltee's life.

Chantel: I still cant stand her slow monotone talk

Libby - we come back from commercial, and surprise the baby is out!

MotherLibby got in the delivery room after all, and for a moment, all those idiots had peace.  Slight chance of thawing relations.

MommaPedro says "Chantel is just as ignorant as her family."

Las Vegas: The screen is fixed.

Colt - "My mother is a sweetheart."

Colt - "She has infinite patience" (so Larissa must have done something)
    Yes, she bought up you and her having your own house without Debbie.

Colt - guzzling that Jack!  😮

Larissa - accuses Colt and Debbie of being lovers.

Felt sad over Ashley and Jay marriage ending, the signing, and the way Jay was treated, even though I know neither of these people should have married in the first place.

I think Debbie is being unfairly singled out for her potty mouth  Most of the people on the show swear, and she was being provoked at the time she did it.    

I was impressed with how Andrrrei was willing to call Mother Elizabeth to come to the delivery room, when Libby wanted her.  It seems like, as a result, Mother Elizabeth and Andrrrei might have a better relationship, going forward.  

I noticed that Mother Elizabeth gently shooed Libby's obnoxious sisters out of the hospital room, after they had been there a while, which kept Andrrrrei from being the heavy.  

I also thought it was good that Andrrrei asked Sisters Elizabeth if they wanted to hold the baby, instead of them having to ask,  This was a nice,  small step in the right direction.   He is certainly a lot less overprotective than Paola, anyway.  

[Lemur]

On 7/2/2019 at 3:01 PM, Neurochick said:

When Ashley went to see the lawyer, she told her that she met Jay three years ago in Jamaica?  What was he, 17?  Talk about grooming.  

That pissed me off because if Ashley tried that in the USA (especially with a 17 year old white 17 year old), she might have had to register as a sex offender, or she could have gone to jail.  But I guess since Jay was black and from Jamaica, he wasn't "really" a child, yeah right, I see you Ashey.

Age of consent in PA is 16.  So it's just gross, not illegal. 

On 7/3/2019 at 1:22 PM, magemaud said:

I'm still gobsmacked about Pedro going to college! 

I wonder if he's a failson and never finished.  That family makes me scratch my head.  Where's Dad?  Is Nicole in college?  

14 hours ago, Adultosaurus said:

Wow, generalization. Most relationships don't end - or else list your source.  Not being married or partnered kinda makes you like the people who don't have kids but know exactly how to raise kids.

All relationships end, unless you and the other person die together, like in a fiery car wreck or plane crash.  

14 hours ago, configdotsys said:

I am confused. I thought until there was some type of legal proceeding that Ashley was not permitted to change the locks on the marital home. Hopefully this drama is over now.

Technically, Jay would have to file a complaint against her for an illegal eviction (which is a civil procedure, btw), but since he doesn't seem to be too inclined to do that, it's a non-issue. 

14 hours ago, Spike said:

I think it was real because in the promo he is flushed and his voice sounds slurred when he tells her he wants a divorce.   Maybe they save the bottle because they keep refilling it with a cheap knockoff brand like some restaurants do with ketchup.

I'm sure there's a handle of Evan Williams lurking behind it. I see you, Colt, hiding your booze from your Mom like I did in high school.

14 hours ago, Bryce Lynch said:

If there is a double standard, I think it is based upon gender, not race.  When an older man has sex with a teenage girl, he is rightly seen a perv and the girl as a victim.  But when an older woman has sex with a teenage boy, the boy is viewed my many as "lucky".  

Depends on the age of the boy, but there's almost as much taboo when it comes to an adult woman with a teenage woman since roughly 1997 (Mary Kay LaTourneau case).  

5 hours ago, Caseysgirl said:

I  can’t figure out why they gave Chantal and Pedro a spin off. They have no charisma, are horrible actors and are not even enjoyable to watch. Their entire relationship has been fighting and if I have to listen to Chantel’s affectless voice discussing the situation for the millionth time I will scream. Won’t even be giving their show a peek.

They got the spin-off because both families are liable to punch someone at any point in time.  

5 hours ago, Angry Moldolvian said:

My thoughts too, either he’s a hardened drinker or it was tea. I can’t imagine drinking whiskey straight and not even a cough, splutter or grimace. It went down way too easy, like a coke on a hot day. Colteee is such a drama queen I wouldn’t put it past him the roly poly psycho dough boy.

He's a shithouse drinker, he's used to downing a good bit of booze quickly.  

4 hours ago, Spike said:

Isn’t iced tea normally served chilled?

Unless production put it up there for you while waiting for your mom to pick you up from work. 

4 hours ago, winsomeone said:

These days, lots of grown, unmarried children live with their parents. They can't make it on their own. That doesn't mean they have sex with each other. I don't see Debbie being physically overly friendly with Colt? I think it is nasty to keep saying they are lovers. They are two people who benefit financially from living together at this point in their lives period. Larrissa is a total bitch and I really doubt any mother would like her or get a long with her period.

They may not be physically intertwined, but there's an unhealthy amount of co-dependence in their relationship.  

1 hour ago, magemaud said:

I've always thought it was against the law to show people on TV drinking real alcohol and they usually use iced tea to represent brownish liquors. 

Only in booze advertising.  If it was illegal, MTV would have gone out of business years ago and reality television would have died on the vine.

Just now, Bryce Lynch said:

I also thought it was good that Andrrrei asked Sisters Elizabeth if they wanted to hold the baby, instead of them having to ask,  This was a nice,  small step in the right direction.   He is certainly a lot less overprotective than Paola, anyway.  

I'm beginning to think that "obnoxious sibling who thinks their opinion should carry way more weigh that it actually does" seems to be a new casting requirement.  River, Nicole, Bitch-faced Jenn ....

[Bryce Lynch]

2 minutes ago, RealReality said:

Knowing that there is a power differential doesn't make it any less so.

Being in a position of being so impoverished that you have to seek out life in another country or have to "scam" an opportunity at a better life out of someone doesn't it make it any less a power differential.

The only thing that makes it a power differential is that one party holds all the power and the other doesn't.  In this situation Ashley held all the power and held it over Jay's head.

His behavior doesn't change tha nature of the vast power imbalance.

And I don't think she ever had any intention of filing that paperwork.  She didn't find out about Jay's tinder exploits until well after she was married.  Which means that she didn't come home thinking he was faithful and filed the adjustment of status, which is what she would have done if she had the intention of doing it.

Instead she sat on it and then had an excuse not to file it.  But she would have always come up with a "reason" why she held off no matter what jay did.  She would have started a fight, she would have nitpicked, she would have found SOMETHING because she had no intention of giving up her power over jay.

And this may be a reason why her prior relationships failed.  She didn't have anything to hold over them so she didn't feel secure.  They were contemporaries not dependents.

I don't think she could legally file for the adjustment of status until after the wedding.  So, if 3 days into she finds out he is being unfaithful, why should she rush to file for it.

We have no way of knowing how Trashley would have proceeded if Jay had been a loving, faithful husband.  He cheated on her from the start, and her reaction of not rushing to file the papers was appropriate.

I just don't see a big "power imbalance" between a green card scammer and a green card scamee.  

Also, Jamaica is not a horribly impoverished country.   

And a scam is a scam no matter how poor you are.   

[Dsnygrl33]

On 7/5/2019 at 12:53 AM, Mrs. Hanson said:

Okay, just watched,  Kinda boring.  I call total bullshit on Ashley throwing the divorce docs at Jay and asking/demanding he sign them.  It needs to be done in front of a notary.  (In MN it does!)

Chantal and Pedro are making up just in time for the spin off!

No Baby Beluga!

Colt and Debbie and Deb - boring.  Lots of swearing.

I filed in Allegheny County in PA and I printed the papers from the courthouse page, had my ex sign a paper that I gave him a set, went down to the courthouse and filed that paper, they date stamped it. 90 days from that I took the final set down that was fully signed by both of us and they filed them. 3 weeks later I had my divorce decree. I am assuming her county would be the same and that lawyer gave her the papers like the ones I printed. We didn't need a notary for any of the forms.

[MajorNelson]

1 hour ago, BravoAddict72 said:

Larissa needs to STFU! She almost went deaf from Debbie slamming the car door? Why is she always accusing Debbie of slamming doors? I get it, I had the worst MIL and couldn't stand her. But I knew yelling at my husband about her and calling her names wasn't going to get him on my side. I would just calmly explain in a nice way how I was feeling and bit my tongue while we were around her, which luckily wasn't too often.

Larissa said slamming doors is very offensive in her culture.  So I imagine if Debbie did it once or twice, it seems extra large in her memory.

[RealReality]

10 minutes ago, Bryce Lynch said:

I don't think she could legally file for the adjustment of status until after the wedding.  So, if 3 days into she finds out he is being unfaithful, why should she rush to file for it.

We have no way of knowing how Trashley would have proceeded if Jay had been a loving, faithful husband.  He cheated on her from the start, and her reaction of not rushing to file the papers was appropriate.

I just don't see a big "power imbalance" between a green card scammer and a green card scamee.  

Also, Jamaica is not a horribly impoverished country.   

And a scam is a scam no matter how poor you are.   

I don't think she found out three days after the wedding.  If she was serious about filing that adjustment of status she would have had it ready the nanosecond she was back from Vegas.  She did not because she had no intention of filing it.

I can put two and two together and make a presumption based off of Ashley's behavior.  As far as she knew he was a loving and faithful husband and she failed to file the adjustment of status.  Whether he was cheating doesn't change the fact that she didn't know about it and failed to file the paperwork because she had no intention of doing so.  

And as Ashley told the story, she didn't care about the huge red flags that jay was not going to be faithful to her.  If having a faithful companion was that important to her why marry a guy who she pretty much admitted had cheated on her?  Why? Because that wasn't important, it was more important to have a relationship where Ashley held all the cards and could have all the power.

There is a huge power imbalance in that one person holds all the power of the opportunity at a better life over the other person's head.  And Jamaica is a very impoverished country.  If you want stats I can provide them because I suppose you shouldn't take my word for it.  And if Ashley's stories of jay living in a place without running water are true, she KNEW that he was impoverished and that she held the opportunity at a better life over his head.

To me, no matter how gross Jay's behavior is it doesn't change the nature of the power imbalance.  If he was "scamming" her for a green card that also doesn't change the fact that she had all the power in the relationship and therefore there is an imbalance of power.

Edited July 8, 2019 by RealReality

[Lemur]

9 minutes ago, Dsnygrl33 said:

I filed in Allegheny County in PA and I printed the papers from the courthouse page, had my ex sign a paper that I gave him a set, went down to the courthouse and filed that paper, they date stamped it. 90 days from that I took the final set down that was fully signed by both of us and they filed them. 3 weeks later I had my divorce decree. I am assuming her county would be the same and that lawyer gave her the papers like the ones I printed. We didn't need a notary for any of the forms.

Nope, that's why it's called the PA Quickie, especially since it used to be much, much more difficult to get divorced in PA. 

[Bryce Lynch]

9 minutes ago, RealReality said:

I don't think she found out three days after the wedding.  If she was serious about filing that adjustment of status she would have had it ready the nanosecond she was back from Vegas.  She did not because she had no intention of filing it.

I can put two and two together and make a presumption based off of Ashley's behavior.  As far as she knew he was a loving and faithful husband and she failed to file the adjustment of status.  Whether he was cheating doesn't change the fact that she didn't know about it and failed to file the paperwork because she had no intention of doing so.  

And as Ashley told the story, she didn't care about the huge red flags that jay was not going to be faithful to her.  If having a faithful companion was that important to her why marry a guy who she pretty much admitted had cheated on her?  Why? Because that wasn't important, it was more important to have a relationship where Ashley held all the cards and could have all the power.

There is a huge power imbalance in that one person holds all the power of the opportunity at a better life over the other person's head.  And Jamaica is a very impoverished country.  If you want stats I can provide them because I suppose you shouldn't take my word for it.  And if Ashley's stories of jay living in a place without running water are true, she KNEW that he was impoverished and that she held the opportunity at a better life over his head.

To me, no matter how gross Jay's behavior is it doesn't change the nature of the power imbalance.  If he was "scamming" her for a green card that also doesn't change the fact that she had all the power in the relationship and therefore there is an imbalance of power.

But, if Trashley didn't care about Jay being faithful, why is she upset and divorcing him?  Why not just keep him around and continue to hold the green card over his head?  

I get people having not sympathy for Trashley.  But, the idea that Jay is a "victim" is absurd.  He was a scammer, whose scam apparently failed.  

[Drogo]

6 hours ago, Spike said:

Isn’t iced tea normally served chilled?

The iced-ness is usually what gives iced tea its charm. 

But Coltee wears Alaska hoodies in Las Vegas, and Deb wears turtlenecks, so 80 degree iced tea might just be cold enough for them.

[RealReality]

15 minutes ago, Bryce Lynch said:

But, if Trashley didn't care about Jay being faithful, why is she upset and divorcing him?  Why not just keep him around and continue to hold the green card over his head?  

I get people having not sympathy for Trashley.  But, the idea that Jay is a "victim" is absurd.  He was a scammer, whose scam apparently failed.  

Because she likes holding things over his head and playing the martyr.  It's her thing.  She was the "victim" when her friend warned her about jay, now she is the "victim" in her relationship.  

I'm not sure I said jay is a victim, maybe I did.  But I know that there is a power imbalance which Ashley enjoys using and has enjoyed using to maintain control and power in the relationship.  

There was a scene after Ashley's NYC girls trip where I think jay had ignored her and was kinda checked out when she came back home.  It wss only then that she announced she was going to "give him a second chance" and it seemed very clear to me that she only decided to do that because it seemed like jay was no longer begging her for another shot and was maybe making alternate plans.

And no matter what the age of consent there is, to me, an implied power imbalance when someone in their late 20s is dating a teenager.  It's far less obvious, but I still think it's there.  A woman in her late 20s should be vastly more mature, more knowledgeable and better situated than a 17 year old.  And that sets up a power imbalance based on one party having more maturity, life experience, money and knowledge than their significant other.   I can only imagine what kind of woman in her late 20s wants a man who is probably still in high school.

[magemaud]

1 hour ago, MajorNelson said:

Larissa said slamming doors is very offensive in her culture

But apparently locking doors is okay

[b2H]

7 hours ago, Caseysgirl said:

I  can’t figure out why they gave Chantal and Pedro a spin off.

Because honestly this is the kind of thing that is ratings gold.  It's why Bridezillas is now unwatchable.  It's why the majority of reality shows are now unwatchable.  Heinous people make ratings.  That's all.

[politichick]

I actually felt a bit sorry for Jay. Yes, he's a dog, but he's also extremely young and immature. And the fact that they met when he was 17 is just eww. I absolutely agree with those who believe there was an imbalance of power that Trashley quite enjoyed and abused. His dick was probably the only thing over which Jay felt he had any control. She probably had little intention of filing for the green card, which was not only a dick move but also probably a bit why he was trolling women on apps and fucking in bathrooms. He was bored as hell, which he repeatedly noted, and maybe he would have had more control if he had something to do. At least he wanted to work, unlike Andrei.

She's a bitch and got what you get when you marry a boy.

Chantel and Pedro are so boring I fast-forwarded through every one of their scenes. Her voice makes my ears bleed.

Russ probably should have waited a few more weeks to have his mother visit, but Pao is being kind of crazy. 

[Spike]

2 hours ago, MajorNelson said:

Jay walks bowlegged

Heavy sack.

[Spike]

2 hours ago, Lemur said:

Is Nicole in college?  

The night Chantel met Mama Pedro (in the strappy Forever ahem 21 dress) without Nicole they said Nicole was at night classes.

[Pepper Mostly]

16 hours ago, magemaud said:

Pao: “I’ve always been the kind of person who likes to share happiness...”

Um, sure...

By that she means showing people her boobs.

4 hours ago, nytonc said:

Pow will drag that miscarriage around with her for the rest of her life. I’m sure she’ll throw it up to Axel when he gets older. She’ll eventually find a way to blame it on her mother-in-law. Rust will be in the corner saying WE had a miscarriage. 

I know a miscarriage is traumatic. I had one. But I hate Pow and everything she thinks, says, does and stands for.

Pao is never going to let go of her miscarriage. Ever. Not only is she the only woman to give birth, she's the only one who ever miscarried. Its not uncommon, Pao. And yes its traumatic and sad, but now you have a baby. I had my son after a miscarriage and a stillbirth. If I hadn't lost those two, I wouldn't have him, and I cannot imagine that. I'm grateful for him every day. Pao needs to take stock and count her damn blessings.

Poor Axel will hear about her 24 hour labor and horrific agony as she brought him into this world (after carrying him in her body for NINE LONG MONTHS) every single time he brings home a C or doesn't clean his room. Poor kid.

3 hours ago, BravoAddict72 said:

I cannot stand Pao! I understand part of where she is coming from. I had a miscarriage right before we had our son so maybe I was a bit overprotective because of it. But I let family members hold him! It's not like Russ's mom is showing up to take the baby home to OK for a weeks visit alone! She is staying in the same house. Then she lied to her witch of a mother. I noticed how she didn't mention that she came down to breakfast in her underwear. Or she was 2 hours late for the shower. I don't care what she says her culture is, all cultures have respect. I hope Russ's mom slaps some sense into both Pao and her mother.

When I had my son after losses, I was so glad to share my joy with--well, everyone! "Here, hold him! Isn't he just great!" I know everyone isn't the same and every new mother has a right to her feelings. But Pao only objects to Russ's mother holding her baby. I bet Pao's mother can hold that baby all she wants. And now Russ is saying he's going to sneak around and pass his son to his mother like a stolen candy bar. Its gross.

1 hour ago, Drogo said:

But Coltee wears Alaska hoodies in Las Vegas, and Deb wears turtlenecks, so 80 degree iced tea might just be cold enough for them.

Don't forget that they enjoy hot, hearty bowls of beef stew in the Las Vegas heat!

[magemaud]

7 minutes ago, Spike said:

 they said Nicole was at night classes.

Do they have Lady of the Night classes in the DR? 

Have we ever heard anything about Pedro’s father except that he’s “Junior”? I can’t keep straight whose fathers are living and/or in the picture. 

[Spike]

3 minutes ago, magemaud said:

Do they have Lady of the Night classes in the DR? 

Have we ever heard anything about Pedro’s father except that he’s “Junior”? I can’t keep straight whose fathers are living and/or in the picture. 

Maybe the day Lidia woke up with her face looking like a California Raisin he hightailed it outta there.

Edited July 8, 2019 by Spike

[Mswldflwr]

14 hours ago, Chippings said:

I just watched this in bits (couldn't take the entire thing) but one thing that caught my eye was Ashley "serving" the divorce papers on Jay herself.  Don't know about Pennsylvania, but I was in this business for years in California, and a party cannot serve their papers own on the other party.  Period.  It has to be done by a third person, either in person or by mail.   Also to complete the divorce (and this seems something that should be pretty universal) there has to be a Proof of Service filed, and the Court will glance at who did the serving.  It just doesn't float.  We suspend disbelief a lot around here, but that really jarred.

(If anybody knows that Pennsylvania is different in this, let me know!)

Beyond that, these people are all pretty loathsome, so I second all the above-mentioned notes about that.

You are actually correct.

For divorce cases in Pennsylvania, the petitioner can serve the respondent through the mail.

A copy of the summons and complaint may be mailed to the defendant “by any form of United States mail requiring a recipient.” If the mail is returned with a notation that the recipient refused to accept it, the plaintiff can then mail the same process by ordinary mail. Service by ordinary mail is complete if the mail is not returned to the sender within 15 days.

If the ordinary mail is returned unclaimed, the sender must make service another way.

Proof of service by mail requires a return receipt signed by the defendant. In an instance where the defendant refuses delivery and the plaintiff thereafter has served the defendant by ordinary mail, the plaintiff is required to provide the returned letter with the notation of the defendant's refusal to accept delivery and an affidavit that the letter was mailed by ordinary mail and was not returned within fifteen days after mailing.

[MajorNelson]

2 hours ago, MajorNelson said:

Larissa said slamming doors is very offensive in her culture.  So I imagine if Debbie did it once or twice, it seems extra large in her memory.

Annie on Pillowtalk told David, who was looking this up on his phone, to put his phone away "it was a b.s. lie."  Ha!

Edited July 8, 2019 by MajorNelson

[Chippings]

3 hours ago, Dsnygrl33 said:

I filed in Allegheny County in PA and I printed the papers from the courthouse page, had my ex sign a paper that I gave him a set, went down to the courthouse and filed that paper, they date stamped it. 90 days from that I took the final set down that was fully signed by both of us and they filed them. 3 weeks later I had my divorce decree. I am assuming her county would be the same and that lawyer gave her the papers like the ones I printed. We didn't need a notary for any of the forms.

22 minutes ago, Mswldflwr said:

You are actually correct.

For divorce cases in Pennsylvania, the petitioner can serve the respondent through the mail.

A copy of the summons and complaint may be mailed to the defendant “by any form of United States mail requiring a recipient.” If the mail is returned with a notation that the recipient refused to accept it, the plaintiff can then mail the same process by ordinary mail. Service by ordinary mail is complete if the mail is not returned to the sender within 15 days.

If the ordinary mail is returned unclaimed, the sender must make service another way.

Proof of service by mail requires a return receipt signed by the defendant. In an instance where the defendant refuses delivery and the plaintiff thereafter has served the defendant by ordinary mail, the plaintiff is required to provide the returned letter with the notation of the defendant's refusal to accept delivery and an affidavit that the letter was mailed by ordinary mail and was not returned within fifteen days after mailing.

The above answer the puzzle very nicely.  That Quickie thing doesn't exist in CA (or didn't a couple of years ago).   The Service element is slightly different there.  It is still unclear, really, if she was just serving Jay or asking him to sign off on whatever terms she wants. There are no kids and no community property (house, savings, cars &c) - but is he entitled to any support that he would be waiving?  In the law hardly anything is Simple.  

Well I have belabored this question enough.  It was a slimy way to handle it, Ashley, but no surprise there.  Thank you for your answers, Colleagues!  

[Mswldflwr]

12 hours ago, Desert Rat said:

I don't know Pennsylvania law, but I don't think Ashley was serving Jay with the divorce papers. Rather, she was asking him to sign to give his consent to the divorce. It's essentially a joint petition for divorce which can be processed more quickly because you don't have to wait for service and the other party to respond. What bothered me about the procedure was that Jay was not given an opportunity to carefully read the papers and seek the advice of independent counsel before signing.  It was offensive that she coerced him into signing by refusing him food and shelter.  Ashley knew very well Jay had a dick control problem long before she married him. Her shock and outrage at his lack of control was unwarranted, and there was no reason to force him into signing the papers that night. 

BTW, you are correct that generally court rules prohibit parties from serving process. You want an independent person to serve process for two reasons. First, you need proof of service for due process. Service by a nonparty is better proof that the person was properly served. Second, it reduces the possibility of conflict or violence.  

Actually, she can't legally kick him out.  If he has a driver's license or ID that lists that as his residence, she legally needs to go to a magistrate to have him evicted.  And she, herself, I'm sure, has even listed that as his residence in all his paperwork.  Too bad he doesn't know any better.  He'd finally have a couple of things to hold over her head.

[Mswldflwr]

9 hours ago, FairyDusted said:

Is Chantel super tall? In her Talking Heads her knees are up to her chin. It looks like she is sitting in a children's chair. 

It certainly was weird.  Her knees did seem to reach her chin, and yet, the boobs were still out.  

[Mswldflwr]

5 hours ago, heatherchandler said:

It's not against the law - look at basically ALL reality tv - Jersey Shore, Real Housewives, etc. they are all drinking A LOT.  No one is faking that. 

I had always thought it was against the law as well, but then there's The Bachelor/ette and Bachelor in Paradise as well.

[Toaster Strudel]

3 hours ago, MajorNelson said:

Colt - "My mother is a sweetheart."

Colt - "She has infinite patience" (so Larissa must have done something)
    Yes, she bought up you and her having your own house without Debbie.

I thought that was really sick.

You can see from space that Debbie is a nasty hag with zero patience.

He's blinded by lust!

[Kid]

Did you see Coltee down that booze right from the bottle????  Can he get any more unattractive and despicable?That apple did not far fall from the drunken tree!!

If I were Larissa, I would’ve gone back to Brazil. It can’t be as bad as living with those two.