S07.E11: State of the Union

[ChristmasJones]

They pretended at the beginning of this series that Bobby and Danielle had a big spat about the dogs.  Does anyone remember that?

Probably had to plant that little piece of fake drama because they knew what a snooze-fest they are otherwise.

[CSunshine76]

All I got out of this boring episode was....Yay, Tre Wilcox! My favorite (local) Top Chef contestant and hottie. :)

None of these couples will last.  Bobby and Danielle ma6 have the best chance but I can’t help but think that deep down inside, they are not happy.  Neither one will admit it because they don’t communicate.   

[princelina]

2 hours ago, gonecrackers said:

Stop kidding around Amber, Dave won't ever get the joke. He probably doesn't even know how to laugh.

I didn't think she was really kidding either :). Mainly because she has already shown that she can't handle stress, or tasks that most adults find routine, and she doesn't feel that she should have to do any extra work than she feels like doing.  As a previous poster said, she'd probably make a great stepmother to older kids!

1 hour ago, After7Only said:

I agree about Dave (probably because I have a similar personality).  I also would also have concerns in dating a 36 year old who hasn’t had a long term  relationship.   It’s possible that Amber didn’t want long term relationships, wanted her freedom, focus on career, etc., but she didn’t say that.   

I would be much happier married to a Dave than an Amber.  I think she actually said she had never been in a relationship with someone trustworthy, and his response annoyed me because - where are all your great relationships, Dave?  Oh that's right - you don't have any, and got married on a cheesy reality show at age 37.

But then the carry-on at the cooking class - you can buy minced garlic in the produce section of the grocery store, FFS.  And if this weren't a sham marriage I would agree with Dave that they should spend some time together and take a trip or two before babies.  She's 36 - say start trying at 38.  Any of these folks who are getting pregnant before anything else are just dumb (yes, Shawnee and Jephte, I'm talking about you, but I hope you're still together :). And yes Dave is judging you - as you should be judging him - to see if this is a workable relationship.  Contrary to what the "experts" would have us believe, getting DIVORCED after 6-8 weeks on a reality show is not that big of a deal.  I sure wouldn't have a kid with her - it would be Bobby with the rescue dog's diarrhea for 18+ years!!

Speaking of which, I'm sure Bobby didn't save his first "I love you" for the MAFS camera crew!  But he did it for tv tonight, and we don't know how Danielle really responded because the editing was very choppy.

[answerphone]

I turned it off when the tantric sex counselor started talking. ???

[DrewPaul2010]

*********Amber Alert**********

I agree with most other comments here I don't believe she is suitable for marriage and wanting to have children before its too late is a terrible reason to marry and a terrible reason to have kids. I believe her desire to have children is for her fulfillment not theirs and I believe she will be in for a terrible rude awakening. She should stop worrying about her insecurities and worry about the insecurity Dave must be feeling about permanently (or more permanently) to this ball of insecurities and deep needs. You would think part of the winnowing process of selecting mates, they also select people really suited to be married and marriage material. Amber isn't and I'm not sure Dave is either. He could be more endearing and affectionate of Amber but I think he'd being going down an endless bunny trail. 

Tristan and Mia....the train wreck is coming and I can hear the train in the distance...

Bobby and Danielle. She's going to have to do something about the doggy situation. Its her hobby his responsibility. Familiarity breeds contempt.

I don't think Dave is emotionally invested in Amber. He's seeing if it has possibilities and giving it the time...but He'll come to his senses. They'll ask for his decision first.

Not sure I Tristan and Mia will make the eight weeks.

Bobby and Danielle we'll be okay...I think.

[Marsh]

4 hours ago, Straycat80 said:

Why is Dr. Pepper wanting Danielle and Bobby to do the tantric sex thing but not the other two couples? Weirdo. 

I know right, makes no sense.  What's her deal.

 

To get Danielle in the mood for sex, Bobby walks around the house in his lobster boxers.

[LilaFowler]

Mia/Tristan: Who cares?

Danielle/Bobby: She is more closed off than he is, but it's fine. He seems to be understanding and compassionate. There is a lot of imbalance in their current home life: her insane daily commute, fostering puppies, a new marriage/relationship, PLUS reality tv cameras. That's quite a lot of change and stress and they are handling it extremely well IMO.

Amber/Dave: Sigh. Where to begin? I've decided that I'm not going to assign blame to one party or the other anymore. It's obvious to me that they are a clear mismatch. He is so measured and controlled, and she is so emotional and insecure. They bring out the worst in each other. I couldn't believe how judgmental he got with her over her past relationships, but then she turned around and freaked out over crushing some garlic. They just aren't good together and watching them makes me uncomfortable. Watching Amber on Unfiltered awkwardly try to answer questions without giving too much away is also uncomfortable.

[humbleopinion]

Amber is just a farcical character acting on producer cues and prompts.

No functional adult acts this helpless about life..

No socks....is there a special meaning I am missing...

Can’t whack garlic with those gel talons...what a F’ing  nightmare!

Would like to be on the couch with Amber and Zachia with her lapdog husband as they watch the episodes....

Other than changing her hair color to brown...Amber is not having any epiphanies about her continual freak outs about nothing.

Fire the producer in charge of Amber...you have made her unwatchable and unlikable

Dave has become a polished turd...

He looks heroic to put up with Amber’s Increasingly ridiculous whining jags about her latest nothing burgers.

Edited September 12, 2018 by humbleopinion

[humbleopinion]

Bobby: Wake up ....the puppy had an explosive poop...

Danielle: ZZZZZZZ

Bobby: (still whispering so he won’t wake up Henry or Nellie) Danielle....

Danielle:ZZZZZZ

Bobby: *!&$%#! (Under his breath...as he quietly slips out of bed)

We all know Bobby won’t wake his wife in the middle of the night.....he’ll take care of the mess, that’s what good guys do.

Edited September 12, 2018 by humbleopinion

[Waterlilly]

Why didn’t Amber have any clean socks if she does her own laundry?  Who exactly was she mad enough at to throw a temper tantrum?  Amber, when you have babies, you don’t always have clean socks, get a shower, get any sleep, get your roots done ( or even wash your hair), get to go to the gym, etc.  She makes me tired, bless her heart. 

[humbleopinion]

Anyone notice when Tristan told the group that they would be moving to Houston that not one person said...We’ll miss you...aww...no guys...you’re breaking up the band...

Nope. Just Mia talking into her plate of food...she really is the master swallowing her words as she talks ...what is with that?

[humbleopinion]

The tantric couch skeeves me out too.

I’ll would rather slather puppy diarrhea on my head than sit fully clothed in a head to toe hazmat suit on that gawd only knows how many people’s bodily fluids have drenched that sex couch.

MAFS manages to hire the most off putting tantric coaches...the streak continues....

[Jeanne222]

I look for Mia to have more secrets.  Tristan can't take another one!

Bobby I love you but hun it's her hobby.  I'd surely rather drive in the car listening to the radio than be up and down with dog shit all night.  Uggg. 

Danielle is uncomfortable with touch.  Made me wonder if there's any sexual abuse in her past.

Amber and Dave.  Gawd their conversations are exhausting.

[Empress1]

8 hours ago, After7Only said:

I agree about Dave (probably because I have a similar personality).  I also would also have concerns in dating a 36 year old who hasn’t had a long term  relationship.   It’s possible that Amber didn’t want long term relationships, wanted her freedom, focus on career, etc., but she didn’t say that.   

She didn't say she'd never had a long-term relationship, she said she'd never had a relationship with someone she trusted. I buy that - between her insecurities and her habit of dating "douches," as she put it, I can see how she always felt like something was off.

I did feel like Dave was judgmental about that, but I would be happier married to a Dave than an Amber, as @princelina said. With Dave, I think you could "train" him to be affectionate and to loosen up a little, but Amber's insecurities are really deep-seated. I was with Dave when he said that they were talking about having kids and he wanted to be feeling happy and excited about it and the conversation went left (although I know a lot of parents who talk about phases they didn't like - my best friend has two kids and hated the first three months with both of them, and her daughter was also kind of a terror at age 3. Her son is 2 and they're nervous about the "terrible threes." I have a former colleague who said when his son turned 3, he went from being a sweet, happy boy to "a monster" - HIS WORDS, not mine, I've never met the child).

I have known people who married later who wanted and were ready for marriage, but I think maybe Amber just isn't. I don't think that makes her a bad person - I think she seems sweet. But I also wonder if she just wanted to check the box. And every time she says she wants kids right now, I think "Sperm bank!"

The chef who taught the cooking class was on Top Chef. I think he did pretty well there. There was a point where Amber was trying to crush garlic and I was like "OH SHIT she's gonna slice her hand open," and Dave must have peeped it too because he winced. 

Did Amber really have a tantrum about socks? In Texas?

Danielle's commute is a fucking nightmare. I'd legit have to find a new job. And Bobby is a lot nicer about these sleepless nights cleaning up dog shit than I would be. As has been said, it's Danielle's hobby but it seems to be inconveniencing Bobby the most. Did I hear they have FOUR dogs right now? I guess they're fostering two?

[humbleopinion]

Yep. 4 Pups...

Danielle’s version of self sabatoge...load  Bobby up to his ears in dogs....

[kira28]

God, Danielle even I love Bobby! How can she not say that back to him? I think it was cruel to make Bobby and Danielle do the tantric lesson. The instructor was weird and not professional. She kept laughing. I can be a freak behind closed doors lol but I would be totally embarrassed to be on national TV with my parents watching me talk about orgasms and what turns me on so just no. They did that just for ratings because they knew it would make bobby and Danielle uncomfortable. My sympathies swing back and forth with Dave and amber. Yes amber is dumb and exhausting. She threw a fit over socks? She's getting ridiculous. But when she tried to share something that meant a lot to her... That she did not feel the need to look thru Dave's phone and she trust him.. Instead of Dave expressing any sort of friendly feeling toward her he once again tears her down. That he doesn't like it that Hsu wife has such poor judgment she has dated men who cheat. Maybe that hits too close to home. I don't think men or women seek out partners who cheat. Though some ignore red flags! Looking at u Tristan! I feel like a large majority of men and women (not all) who are still single do cheat If given the opportunity. Or maybe there are a greater number who do than who remain faithful so the odds are just by being single at 36 the pool of men amber has access to include a majority who are not trust worthy. In her defense I'm sure she didn't actively seek them out knowing they were not going to be faithful. Dave Acts like amber doesn't deserve better than they or soemthing. As though she's not good enough for him

 Be disappointed she can't cook won't do laundry, is lazy and insecure and nuts but dont judge her by how lot or not her past boyfriends were. 

[Crazy Bird Lady]

3 hours ago, kira28 said:

My sympathies swing back and forth with Dave and amber. Yes amber is dumb and exhausting. She threw a fit over socks?

[Crazy Bird Lady: actually, I thought it had been Dave that wore no socks. But that's silly and it seemed like a half-joke between them -although as we've all seen, even "jokes" between them can turn into something ugly.]

She's getting ridiculous. But when she tried to share something that meant a lot to her... That she did not feel the need to look thru Dave's phone and she trust him.. Instead of Dave expressing any sort of friendly feeling toward her he once again tears her down. That he doesn't like it that Hsu wife has such poor judgment she has dated men who cheat. Maybe that hits too close to home. I don't think men or women seek out partners who cheat.

Yes, Dave was a total jerk for reacting that way. Trust is the most important gift you can give your spouse, and there are many, many people who may fall in love over and over, but never take the risk of actually trusting the person they're with. That was a huge step for Amber, the most precious gift she could have offered Dave --and he tossed it aside contemptuously!!

 

Quote

In her defense I'm sure she didn't actively seek them out knowing they were not going to be faithful. Dave Acts like amber doesn't deserve better than they or soemthing. As though she's not good enough for him. 

Dave has already decided that Amber isn't 'good enough' for him. And this time, it will be her husband who gave her that message! She's way too emotionally damaged to be able to bounce back from that, and I'm thinking this will be the last time Amber dares to trust a man. 

Amber wasn't ready for marriage when she was 'chosen' for this 'experiment'. She especially wasn't ready for marriage with a judgemental man like Dave.

Edited September 12, 2018 by Crazy Bird Lady

[Neurochick]

I'd laugh if Tristan and Mia turned out to be the couple who last.  I would NOT be surprised if they do though.

[retiredviewer]

I don't get the problem with the men cooking. They all seem to enjoy it so let them cook. After I was married a few years my husband realized how much I didn't like cooking. We made a deal, he cooks, I clean up. We've been married 41 years, he still cooks, and he is great at it.

Next, Amber should have gone to a sperm bank. That's all she really wants.

[islandgal140]

Danielle is making out like a bandit with this marriage. Did y'all hear her at the tantric session? The 3 questions were: 1) what I'm loving about the relationship 2) what I'm challenged by 3) what I'd need

Bobby's answers were he loved the time spent together, he's challenged by all the damn dogs and he needs her to express her feelings more

Danielle answers were she loves his commitment to her, she has no challenges and she needs continued support.

So essentially, Danielle is like I love all the shit you do and keep doing it. All her shit was about her and no duh of course she has no challenges because Bobby is doing everything.  I get it she has a long ass commute, but sooner or later, Bobby will have enough!

Bobby basically poured his heart and soul out at the end of the episode and her and her eyebrows sat there just grinning and eating it up.

I thought when Dave was talking about how sad it was Amber never had anyone she trusted he was thinking of that gym friend plowing his wife. That's why his ass seemed extra pressed and judgmental. 

Aint no way Amber was joking about their baby going from newborn to being 5 years old. Dave had every reason to side eye her for that comment.

Amber doesnt want to cook nor do her husband's laundry because that is extra shit but thinks she can care for a baby???

[qtpye]

3 hours ago, humbleopinion said:

Amber is just a farcical character acting on producer cues and prompts.

No functional adult acts this helpless about life..

No socks....is there a special meaning I am missing...

Can’t whack garlic with those gel talons...what a F’ing  nightmare!

Would like to be on the couch with Amber and Zachia with her lapdog husband as they watch the episodes....

Other than changing her hair color to brown...Amber is not having any epiphanies about her continual freak outs about nothing.

Fire the producer in charge of Amber...you have made her unwatchable and unlikable

Dave has become a polished turd...

He looks heroic to put up with Amber’s Increasingly ridiculous whining jags about her latest nothing burgers.

 

1 hour ago, Empress1 said:

She didn't say she'd never had a long-term relationship, she said she'd never had a relationship with someone she trusted. I buy that - between her insecurities and her habit of dating "douches," as she put it, I can see how she always felt like something was off.

I did feel like Dave was judgmental about that, but I would be happier married to a Dave than an Amber, as @princelina said. With Dave, I think you could "train" him to be affectionate and to loosen up a little, but Amber's insecurities are really deep-seated. I was with Dave when he said that they were talking about having kids and he wanted to be feeling happy and excited about it and the conversation went left (although I know a lot of parents who talk about phases they didn't like - my best friend has two kids and hated the first three months with both of them, and her daughter was also kind of a terror at age 3. Her son is 2 and they're nervous about the "terrible threes." I have a former colleague who said when his son turned 3, he went from being a sweet, happy boy to "a monster" - HIS WORDS, not mine, I've never met the child).

I have known people who married later who wanted and were ready for marriage, but I think maybe Amber just isn't. I don't think that makes her a bad person - I think she seems sweet. But I also wonder if she just wanted to check the box. And every time she says she wants kids right now, I think "Sperm bank!"

The chef who taught the cooking class was on Top Chef. I think he did pretty well there. There was a point where Amber was trying to crush garlic and I was like "OH SHIT she's gonna slice her hand open," and Dave must have peeped it too because he winced. 

Did Amber really have a tantrum about socks? In Texas?

Danielle's commute is a fucking nightmare. I'd legit have to find a new job. And Bobby is a lot nicer about these sleepless nights cleaning up dog shit than I would be. As has been said, it's Danielle's hobby but it seems to be inconveniencing Bobby the most. Did I hear they have FOUR dogs right now? I guess they're fostering two?

As we have all realized Amber and Dave are a horrible match. They will bring out the worst in each other. I wonder if the producers give them monetary incentives to stay married as many couples on this show have stayed married on decision day only to call it off in about a year.  Dave is probably thinking that he will stay married to Amber a little longer to obtain some money but there is no way in hell that he will be hitched to this woman forever by having a child with her. He knows that Amber wants a child, asap so he is trying to finagle that. However,

Spoiler

the preview just showed a clip of Amber getting insecure (big shock) because Dave dared to talk to one of her attractive friends who happens to be a brunette. Lord, give it up Amber, YOU ARE A BRUNETTE and no one thinks that hair color is natural.

 

Spoiler tagged because it talks about the preview

46 minutes ago, kira28 said:

God, Danielle even I love Bobby! How can she not say that back to him? I think it was cruel to make Bobby and Danielle do the tantric lesson. The instructor was weird and not professional. She kept laughing. I can be a freak behind closed doors lol but I would be totally embarrassed to be on national TV with my parents watching me talk about orgasms and what turns me on so just no. They did that just for ratings because they knew it would make bobby and Danielle uncomfortable. My sympathies swing back and forth with Dave and amber. Yes amber is dumb and exhausting. She threw a fit over socks? She's getting ridiculous. But when she tried to share something that meant a lot to her... That she did not feel the need to look thru Dave's phone and she trust him.. Instead of Dave expressing any sort of friendly feeling toward her he once again tears her down. That he doesn't like it that Hsu wife has such poor judgment she has dated men who cheat. Maybe that hits too close to home. I don't think men or women seek out partners who cheat. Though some ignore red flags! Looking at u Tristan! I feel like a large majority of men and women (not all) who are still single do cheat If given the opportunity. Or maybe there are a greater number who do than who remain faithful so the odds are just by being single at 36 the pool of men amber has access to include a majority who are not trust worthy. In her defense I'm sure she didn't actively seek them out knowing they were not going to be faithful. Dave Acts like amber doesn't deserve better than they or soemthing. As though she's not good enough for him

 Be disappointed she can't cook won't do laundry, is lazy and insecure and nuts but dont judge her by how lot or not her past boyfriends were. 

Bobby is acting like a guy who has just made love for the first time. I wonder if he was a virgin before marriage...not that it matters. The thing is I think Danielle WANTS to be into Bobby because he is being so awesome, but she just isn't feeling him the way that he is into her. This happens...peoples emotions do not always travel at the same speed. It will be interesting to see how their life will be like once she gets a new job and does not have such a long commute.

[PityFree]

 Maybe if Amber had bothered to do the laundry like she promised she’d have some clean socks.

[Mercolleen]

Not much to add. Except two choice quotes from Amber, during the same conversation:

"I lose eggs, like, every year."

"I'm not really excited about the baby stuff."

THEN ADOPT A KINDERGARTNER! Wait, maybe it should be older so it will be taller and able to do its own laundry.

[DrewPaul2010]

Quote

 Be disappointed she can't cook won't do laundry, is lazy and insecure and nuts but dont judge her by how lot or not her past boyfriends were. 

Dave could have turned that into a positive moment and said that he is a trustworthy and she is with a good man. However Dave's got to be thinking this isn't going to change I'm with someone who's insecurities and extremely high maintenance and it will be the same a year down the road. I would view her admission she's been a bum magnet with guys as yet another red flag. If he does agree to stay married it will be for the camera, we'll hear a month down the road they separated.

I wonder of Dr Pepper has had a tantric coach? Danielle needs to decide what is more important, her husband or he hobby which has become her husbands responsibility?

[qtpye]

11 minutes ago, Mercolleen said:

Not much to add. Except two choice quotes from Amber, during the same conversation:

"I lose eggs, like, every year."

"I'm not really excited about the baby stuff."

THEN ADOPT A KINDERGARTNER! Wait, maybe it should be older so it will be taller and able to do its own laundry.

She will be insecure that the Kindergartner would have preferred a brunette mother...while her own hair falls out from the bleaching.

[Gem 10]

11 hours ago, Booger666 said:

I don’t think Dave is a dick or a douche.  He seems very practical, even-keeled and mild.  He has no clue how to handle Amber and her insecurities so he says things he shouldn’t, but there isn’t any malice or bad intent to what he is saying.   Dave and Amber are so mismatched they are highlighting the worst in each other.  It’s very obvious how different they are and the “experts” should be ashamed of themselves for putting them through this.  They both seem to be trying, but it is such a struggle that it is exhausting and frustrating - for them and us.

I also think Danielle is getting a bit of a bad rap about the extra work Bobby is doing.  I believe they said she has a 3hr daily commute.  If Bobby does an extra 1.5hrs of housework each day that is a lot, but it still means he has 1.5hrs each day to relax that Danielle doesn’t.  I’m sure they will figure out a better solution in the long term, even if it involves moving and/or changing jobs.

I agree everything about Dave.

[DrewPaul2010]

What does Amber do for a living? It must be about the only thing she is successful at. Did she BS her way through all the endless forms and questionnaires? These people who agree to do this show put faith in the counselors to match them with someone who is marriage material and in this case mother material and she is neither. Dave should get a refund immediately. I wish we could have seen the sock episode...did she have a total melt down over socks?

Actually babies don't have to keep you up at night...let them cry about three nights in a row and they will give up crying at night (since it does no good). 

[qtpye]

7 minutes ago, DrewPaul2010 said:

What does Amber do for a living? It must be about the only thing she is successful at. Did she BS her way through all the endless forms and questionnaires? These people who agree to do this show put faith in the counselors to match them with someone who is marriage material and in this case mother material and she is neither. Dave should get a refund immediately. I wish we could have seen the sock episode...did she have a total melt down over socks?

Actually babies don't have to keep you up at night...let them cry about three nights in a row and they will give up crying at night (since it does no good). 

I think they said she is a senior title analyst.

[JapMo]

44 minutes ago, qtpye said:

Bobby is acting like a guy who has just made love for the first time. I wonder if he was a virgin before marriage...not that it matters. The thing is I think Danielle WANTS to be into Bobby because he is being so awesome, but she just isn't feeling him the way that he is into her. This happens...peoples emotions do not always travel at the same speed. It will be interesting to see how their life will be like once she gets a new job and does not have such a long commute.

I think it's sweet that he's so over the moon about her, but I would be taken aback a bit if someone said they loved me just 30 days after meeting.  Now these kinds of situations do happen, and sometimes the couple ends up still ga ga over each other 40 years later, and people who date for several years, have a long engagement and marry unhurriedly break up in less than a year.  You never can tell.  But I can't hold it against Danielle that she couldn't say (on camera at least) the "L" word.  But if you watch her face when he says he loves her and he is talking to her right after on the bed but we can't tell what he's saying, and if this happened just as it was shot and not edited and cut to pieces, the dazzling smile she gave him said it all, IMO.  She really really likes him a LOT.  They seem so thrilled with each other, like they are the luckiest people alive.  I get that from him AND her.  They seem good for each other, and I'm just not buying that the relationship is uneven and he is doing so much more than her.  They're editing it that way to manufacture drama.  

I've defended Dave but his comments last night would have pissed me off, too.  Amber says he's the first guy she trusted and he says that's concerning?  To even comment on the fact she's talked baby then jumped to them being 5 years old, like that was a red flag, what the hell?  Amber really wants a baby so I'm sure she understands what that all entails, as we all did when we thought we knew and then actually had one and thought...what did I get myself into?...and then survived it and did it all over again, LOL.  Amber is ready to be married and she's ready to have kids.  But not with this guy.  As I've said before, Dave needs someone more laid back and confident in themselves.  Amber reads something into everything he says, though his unnecessary asides and mutterings really drive her up the wall, and by this time he should know that.  In a nutshell, Dave isn't the type to hold her in his arms, wipe the tears from her eyes and say "there there".  And that's what she needs.  

Oi vay....here we go again...Tristan and Mia swaddled in blankies the entire episode.

[qtpye]

2 minutes ago, JapMo said:

Oi vay....here we go again...Tristan and Mia swaddled in blankies the entire episode.

There was a certain point where it appeared that Mia fashioned a dress out of a snuggie.

[Neurochick]

1 hour ago, islandgal140 said:

So essentially, Danielle is like I love all the shit you do and keep doing it. All her shit was about her and no duh of course she has no challenges because Bobby is doing everything.  I get it she has a long ass commute, but sooner or later, Bobby will have enough!

Maybe the situation is that Bobby loves Danielle more than Danielle loves Bobby.  

Amber needs to just go to a sperm bank, or adopt more cats and call it a day.  She doesn't want to be married.

[LakeGal]

Was that a snuggie that Mia was wearing?  I never saw her feet in that blue thing.  And why is Tristan always swaddled in a blanket?  Do they not pay their heating bill?  It might just be his way of keeping Mia away.  He blocks her off by covering every inch of his body with blankets.

[Claire Voyant]

7 minutes ago, Neurochick said:

Maybe the situation is that Bobby loves Danielle more than Danielle loves Bobby.  

Amber needs to just go to a sperm bank, or adopt more cats and call it a day.  She doesn't want to be married.

I totally agree. 

If those two are having a nice time with each other, and are obviously very private people, I can't understand why they were chosen to try to humiliate with a foolish sex therapy session on national television.  Gag me with a spoon and..."Thanks but, no thanks, I'll just stand here by the door and you can explain how all this is supposed to help a.n.y.t.h.i.n.g." 

Amber is 36 years old and sucks the life out of anyone in her path.  I'd feel more sorry for her, but she's too old to be playing the helpless, hapless female bullshit.   She's emotionally draining.  I wouldn't want to be around a steady diet of her and that's just a fact of life.  Dave's no smooth talking Romeo, but he tries to be as honest about things as he knows how to be.  Amber can't be bothered to wash socks, yet she's supposed to automatically be his choice for the mother of his children????  WTF, Amber.  You can't take care of a silk plant.  Poor Paisley needs more toys and some attention.  

Next weeks preview looks like poor Dave is making a HUGE mistake talking to another female...and OMG! She's a BRUNETTE.   This aughta be good.  :D

Tristan and Mia.  Ew.  That is all. 

[DrewPaul2010]

Quote

I think it's sweet that he's so over the moon about her, but I would be taken aback a bit if someone said they loved me just 30 days after meeting.

Really? I'd be wondering if they didn't after 30 days of marriage.

Quote

She really really likes him a LOT. 

What's not to like? He's taken on her 15K of debt she brought to the marriage, he's taken responsibility for her 'hobby'. Why bother with a husband when you can have a man servant.

Quote

Amber really wants a baby so I'm sure she understands what that all entails, as we all did when we thought we knew and then actually had one and thought...what did I get myself into

I don't think she has any idea the level of sacrifice and selflessness it takes to raise a child (I'm sure she plans on two). For some people having children is a great thing because it forces you to stop thinking only about yourself...

[Racj82]

14 hours ago, Straycat80 said:

Amber is insecure, freaks out about no socks, throws socks, can’t cook. Dave needs to just suck it up and deal with it. She’s not going to change. 

Uh, I do believe there is something else he can do. Which I'm sure he will as soon as soon as the check clears.

[DrewPaul2010]

Quote

Amber is 36 years old and sucks the life out of anyone in her path.  I'd feel more sorry for her, but she's too old to be playing the helpless, hapless female bullshit.   She's emotionally draining.  I wouldn't want to be around a steady diet of her and that's just a fact of life.

I don't think Dave does either. I can understand why Amber applied for MAFS, by her own admission she has been a bum magnet. I don't get Dave at all he seems like the kind that would pick out a suitable wife on his own. The fact she waits until 36 to get married and have kids says a lot about her life. 

[kira28]

It was very off putting the way amber said she got married at first sight because she wants a baby right away. Amber worries she's not good enough for Dave but she didn't care who she was matched with as long as he had viable sperm and could be talked into knocking her up right away. 

[Racj82]

2 minutes ago, DrewPaul2010 said:

I don't think Dave does either. I can understand why Amber applied for MAFS, by her own admission she has been a bum magnet. I don't get Dave at all he seems like the kind that would pick out a suitable wife on his own. The fact she waits until 36 to get married and have kids says a lot about her life. 

I meant to say this before but I wonder if Dave has ever had to work hard in relationships. Meaning has he ever tried to tough it out through some patches or does he just nail because he doesn't see anything there. I think that's also why he has a hard time relating to all of Amber's insecurities. It's more than he's ever taken on in a relationship before. Which if true, marriage shouldn't be your first tackle at this type of committment. 

[gonecrackers]

I feel the show was aware of Amber's insecurities & ran with it, heavily. It helps immensely that she was matched with a critical man lacking in affection who is obviously not making her feel any better about herself. It's true depending on who someone is with, they can either build up their partner or help tear them further down. I personally feel Dave is working the latter with Amber. I don't believe he feels she's worthy of him, & it may be something to do with 'gym guy' or other men she's been with. I'm finding it to be the elephant in the room this season with these two as it hasn't been addressed since their honeymoon.

I believe both signed up for the wrong reasons. Dave seems more suited to single life, but may have wanted to fit in with his married buds who are extremely important to him. Amber probably just wanted a baby.

I cannot believe not one 'expert' would pick up on the fact that she struggles with insecurities & has baby fever, while also not picking up on the fact that Dave is more methodical & measured - & that it would be a disaster to match two people like this. They damn well knew & it's another one of their nasty 'for good TV' matches.

I'm not worried about Dave. He's more confident in who he is & what he's about. I don't think his way about him will change, & he'll probably end up staying single or marry someone who is stronger than Amber thus unaffected.

Amber has a lot of work to do on getting herself together. She does not have to learn to cook. She does need to take a giant step back from men, forget about babies for now, & work on getting herself together so she can be a good partner & mom someday, if it's meant to be. If not she'll at least be happier with herself even if single & childless (not a bad thing) - either way it will be a win-win for her if she takes that time.

[Lily247]

4 hours ago, Empress1 said:

She didn't say she'd never had a long-term relationship, she said she'd never had a relationship with someone she trusted. I buy that - between her insecurities and her habit of dating "douches," as she put it, I can see how she always felt like something was off.

I did feel like Dave was judgmental about that, but I would be happier married to a Dave than an Amber, as @princelina said. With Dave, I think you could "train" him to be affectionate and to loosen up a little, but Amber's insecurities are really deep-seated. I was with Dave when he said that they were talking about having kids and he wanted to be feeling happy and excited about it and the conversation went left (although I know a lot of parents who talk about phases they didn't like - my best friend has two kids and hated the first three months with both of them, and her daughter was also kind of a terror at age 3. Her son is 2 and they're nervous about the "terrible threes." I have a former colleague who said when his son turned 3, he went from being a sweet, happy boy to "a monster" - HIS WORDS, not mine, I've never met the child).

I have known people who married later who wanted and were ready for marriage, but I think maybe Amber just isn't. I don't think that makes her a bad person - I think she seems sweet. But I also wonder if she just wanted to check the box. And every time she says she wants kids right now, I think "Sperm bank!"

For some reason I dont like Danielle. She seems incredibly cold. I doubt that she has many girlfriends TBH, she doesnt really open up to the other girls in this experiment. Plus when her mother surprised her by showing up to the wedding, I didn't see much emotion at all from Danielle... did she even hug her ? 

I get where Dave is coming from, about not liking the fact that Amber only dated the "wrong type of guy". Unfortunately it kind of does say a lot about her and also the types of guys who would date her. I tr s aort of like putting in his face that he is by far the best guy she has ever had - by far. Dave is very measured and controlled but I feel that on a man it is also a very attractive trait. I do think that with the right person he could be very affectionate. 

[Happyfatchick]

15 hours ago, gonecrackers said:

Mia looks like she's wearing a blue potato sack.

What WAS that stretchy awful thing??  

[gonecrackers]

12 minutes ago, Happyfatchick said:

What WAS that stretchy awful thing??  

Mia:

Yes we can...

[Happyfatchick]

I found it a little awkward when Dave stopped (and stayed parked) on her never having had someone she trusted before.  I think she meant that as a compliment to him, or an accolade.  I trust you, never trusted anyone before.  But he took that as a negative and almost a negative on HER part.  And maybe it is - it’s a circle, coming back to her insecurities.  She never trusted anyone because maybe she chose not to.  What I’m earth has that girl been thru to make her throw up such a negative force field around herself?

and I do agree with y’all - having to deal with her plethora of insecurities has to be EXHAUSTING.  It seems never-ending too.  He has to be thinking just as he gets over one hurdle, he can already see the next looming.  If he sticks it out, it’s a LIFETIME commitment of holding her up constantly every minute of every day.  And THEN, throw a baby in the mix, and she’s going to be insecure about THAT as well.  Every time anyone suggests anything to her about how to do something, she’ll have a meltdown.  She’s not really baby raising material.  Hi Amber!!  I think you are quite attractive, probably fairly intelligent, high maintenance and exhausting.  Do you ever just dive off the cliff and just HAVE FUN???

[humbleopinion]

Dave Flaherty welcome to Honeymoon Island!

[RocketGirl]

1 hour ago, LakeGal said:

Was that a snuggie that Mia was wearing?  I never saw her feet in that blue thing.  And why is Tristan always swaddled in a blanket?  Do they not pay their heating bill?  It might just be his way of keeping Mia away.  He blocks her off by covering every inch of his body with blankets.

I agree, it looked like Mia was wearing a sleeping bag!  I get the feeling that she's not that into Tristan and is just playing along so she doesn't tarnish her reputation even more on national TV.

[RocketGirl]

29 minutes ago, Happyfatchick said:

I found it a little awkward when Dave stopped (and stayed parked) on her never having had someone she trusted before.  I think she meant that as a compliment to him, or an accolade.  I trust you, never trusted anyone before.  But he took that as a negative and almost a negative on HER part.  

I think Dave really freaked out about Amber's admission that she trusts him after never trusting anyone else before.  I don't think he wants to stay with her and suddenly realized how much that will crush her, so his response was meant to be discouraging.  The guys she's dated before are a reflection of her low self-esteem.  She needs to understand that her self-esteem must come from within and cannot be obtained from a guy. 

[Crazy Bird Lady]

37 minutes ago, Happyfatchick said:

THEN, throw a baby in the mix, and she’s [Amber] going to be insecure about THAT as well.  Every time anyone suggests anything to her about how to do something, she’ll have a meltdown.  She’s not really baby raising material.  Hi Amber!!  I think you are quite attractive, probably fairly intelligent, high maintenance and exhausting.  Do you ever just dive off the cliff and just HAVE FUN???

Unfortunately, I'm concerned that after this is over she might just dive off a cliff (probably in her car). 

[RocketGirl]

2 hours ago, JapMo said:

I think it's sweet that he's so over the moon about her, but I would be taken aback a bit if someone said they loved me just 30 days after meeting.  Now these kinds of situations do happen, and sometimes the couple ends up still ga ga over each other 40 years later, and people who date for several years, have a long engagement and marry unhurriedly break up in less than a year.  You never can tell.  But I can't hold it against Danielle that she couldn't say (on camera at least) the "L" word.  But if you watch her face when he says he loves her and he is talking to her right after on the bed but we can't tell what he's saying, and if this happened just as it was shot and not edited and cut to pieces, the dazzling smile she gave him said it all, IMO.  She really really likes him a LOT.  They seem so thrilled with each other, like they are the luckiest people alive.  I get that from him AND her.  They seem good for each other, and I'm just not buying that the relationship is uneven and he is doing so much more than her.  They're editing it that way to manufacture drama.  

I agree, it's expecting too much for every single person on this show to be able to say "I love you" after such a short time.  Danielle seems like she's not one to toss that phrase around lightly and wants to really mean it when she says it.  Right now Bobby, while sincere, seems very infatuated.  I also think the dog drama is totally manufactured.  Anyone who's into dogs would know that an untrained/sick dog should be confined to a small area where the floor is covered with puppy pads that can simply be picked up, thrown away, and replaced as soon as the dog poops on them.  It's no work at all to do that.

[Crazy Bird Lady]

9 minutes ago, RocketGirl said:

I think Dave really freaked out about Amber's admission that she trusts him after never trusting anyone else before.  I don't think he wants to stay with her and suddenly realized how much that will crush her, so his response was meant to be discouraging.  

True. Dave might actually have a conscience. Who knew?

[Empress1]

2 hours ago, JapMo said:

I think it's sweet that he's so over the moon about her, but I would be taken aback a bit if someone said they loved me just 30 days after meeting.  Now these kinds of situations do happen, and sometimes the couple ends up still ga ga over each other 40 years later, and people who date for several years, have a long engagement and marry unhurriedly break up in less than a year.  You never can tell.  But I can't hold it against Danielle that she couldn't say (on camera at least) the "L" word.  But if you watch her face when he says he loves her and he is talking to her right after on the bed but we can't tell what he's saying, and if this happened just as it was shot and not edited and cut to pieces, the dazzling smile she gave him said it all, IMO.  She really really likes him a LOT.  They seem so thrilled with each other, like they are the luckiest people alive.  I get that from him AND her.  They seem good for each other, and I'm just not buying that the relationship is uneven and he is doing so much more than her.  They're editing it that way to manufacture drama.  

I've defended Dave but his comments last night would have pissed me off, too.  Amber says he's the first guy she trusted and he says that's concerning?  To even comment on the fact she's talked baby then jumped to them being 5 years old, like that was a red flag, what the hell?  Amber really wants a baby so I'm sure she understands what that all entails, as we all did when we thought we knew and then actually had one and thought...what did I get myself into?...and then survived it and did it all over again, LOL.  Amber is ready to be married and she's ready to have kids.  But not with this guy.  As I've said before, Dave needs someone more laid back and confident in themselves.  Amber reads something into everything he says, though his unnecessary asides and mutterings really drive her up the wall, and by this time he should know that.  In a nutshell, Dave isn't the type to hold her in his arms, wipe the tears from her eyes and say "there there".  And that's what she needs.  

Oi vay....here we go again...Tristan and Mia swaddled in blankies the entire episode.

I think Bobby probably IS doing more day to day housework than Danielle is, simply because she commutes three hours a day. If Bobby's commute is shorter, and he's said it is, he's just home more and has more time to do that stuff. I think the thing is that he doesn't seem to MIND that he does more than she does, which is great, and the show tries to manufacture drama by making it seems as though he does mind. But I totally believe that he spends more time taking care of the house than she does because he likely HAS more time to spend. Danielle herself has said that he basically takes care of her.