Darcey & Jesse: Cougar Town

[Gobi]

22 minutes ago, FrancescaFiore said:

If ever two people deserved to make each other miserable..

Now we know who stole Jesse’s backpack.

[RealReality]

I hate to admit it, but physically, that picture of Jesse and Maria makes them look like a good match. 

Who wants to be $5 that Jesse tried to file some ridiculous insurance claim for an alleged 60k of watches he kept in his backpack?

It reminds me of my first year as a claims adjuster and some guy with a stolen car radio in a 2000 Toyota Corolla claimed that his mother had a number of fur coats that had left in the car that had also been stolen.

[mamadrama]

It IS kinda funny that Caesar went, what, 4 years and never met her and yet she has zero trouble hooking up with Jesse. He probably wrote her and was like, "People hate me, too,because of the editing so we should get together and do some PR."

[AZChristian]

9 hours ago, mamadrama said:

It IS kinda funny that Caesar went, what, 4 years and never met her and yet she has zero trouble hooking up with Jesse. He probably wrote her and was like, "People hate me, too,because of the editing so we should get together and do some PR."

"Besides . . . Caesar bought you a ring for less than $100, and I have (well, had before the theft) over $60,000 in watches that I carry around in my backpack."

[Elizzikra]

46 minutes ago, AZChristian said:

"Besides . . . Caesar bought you a ring for less than $100, and I have (well, had before the theft) over $60,000 in watches that I carry around in my backpack."

I'm confused. Did Jesse have an entire watch wardrobe that totaled $60K or did he just have one watch that was $60K (which maybe should have been on his wrist but I digress)?

[AZChristian]

3 minutes ago, Elizzikra said:

I'm confused. Did Jesse have an entire watch wardrobe that totaled $60K or did he just have one watch that was $60K (which maybe should have been on his wrist but I digress)?

According to Soapdirt:

"What was stolen from Jesse Meester was not cheap. The 90 Day Fiance celeb lost a Louis Vuitton bag, a $43,000 watch, and another watch worth $6,000. "

[Elizzikra]

Just now, AZChristian said:

According to Soapdirt:

"What was stolen from Jesse Meester was not cheap. The 90 Day Fiance celeb lost a Louis Vuitton bag, a $43,000 watch, and another watch worth $6,000. "

Ahhhhh. Who carries a $43,000 watch around in a backback, LV notwithstanding?

[AZChristian]

2 minutes ago, Elizzikra said:

Ahhhhh. Who carries a $43,000 watch around in a backback, LV notwithstanding?

Jesse does . . . just like all those people on "The People's Court" who have their car towed with three laptops, six tablets and a 55-inch TV in the trunk.  Then they sue the tow company for the missing stuff.

[Elizzikra]

1 minute ago, AZChristian said:

Jesse does . . . just like all those people on "The People's Court" who have their car towed with three laptops, six tablets and a 55-inch TV in the trunk.  Then they sue the tow company for the missing stuff.

Well yeah, like how you do of of course...

[FrancescaFiore]

3 hours ago, AZChristian said:

Jesse does . . . just like all those people on "The People's Court" who have their car towed with three laptops, six tablets and a 55-inch TV in the trunk.  Then they sue the tow company for the missing stuff.

LOL! "Muh hoopty was towed and it had the Hope Diamond in it. Now it's gone. The tow company owes me infinity dollars." - Jesse the Messe

[ALittleShelfish]

3 hours ago, Elizzikra said:

Well yeah, like how you do of of course...

Right? I mean... you DON'T?  

[charmed1]

3 hours ago, AZChristian said:

Jesse does . . . just like all those people on "The People's Court" who have their car towed with three laptops, six tablets and a 55-inch TV in the trunk.  Then they sue the tow company for the missing stuff.

Ha! And emotional distress.

[FrancescaFiore]

28 minutes ago, charmed1 said:

Ha! And emotional distress.

Can I sue Darcey and Jesse for MY emotional distress? Those two drive me bonkers.  He's such a drama queen and she's such a kvetch, the combination is beyond toxic. To viewers. They kinda deserve each other. 

[RealReality]

On 11/19/2019 at 6:43 AM, AZChristian said:

According to Soapdirt:

"What was stolen from Jesse Meester was not cheap. The 90 Day Fiance celeb lost a Louis Vuitton bag, a $43,000 watch, and another watch worth $6,000. "

Boring old people to death must pay well. 

[DutchbutnoJesse]

On 11/19/2019 at 4:43 PM, AZChristian said:

According to Soapdirt:

"What was stolen from Jesse Meester was not cheap. The 90 Day Fiance celeb lost a Louis Vuitton bag, a $43,000 watch, and another watch worth $6,000. "

And some loubuotins? 😊

[FrancescaFiore]

I've begun to really worry about the bulging veins on Darcey's forehead. The more she cries, the bigger those veins pop out and I'm a-skeered she's gonna go all explodey-head. 

[Elizzikra]

3 hours ago, DutchbutnoJesse said:

And some loubuotins? 😊

Does Loubuotin make men's shoes???

[DutchbutnoJesse]

31 minutes ago, Elizzikra said:

Does Loubuotin make men's shoes???

Jesse doesn't care.

[Baltimore Betty]

Jesse had a bag full of expensive items in an expensive bag but gave Darcey a big fake "promise" ring.  He really does treat himself well.

[RealReality]

32 minutes ago, Baltimore Betty said:

Jesse had a bag full of expensive items in an expensive bag but gave Darcey a big fake "promise" ring.  He really does treat himself well.

He probably tricked a few old folks into writing him into their will. 

[FrancescaFiore]

2 hours ago, RealReality said:

He probably tricked a few old folks into writing him into their will. 

Yeah, and then bored them to death with his lectures on finding love when he's yet to find anyone who'll tolerate his passive/aggressive emotional abuse. It's the perfect crime!

[LilMissKnowitall]

4 hours ago, Elizzikra said:

Does Loubuotin make men's shoes???

Yes, I saw a Loubuotin store in an upscale mall in Boston last weekend. The men's shoes in the window were hideous, gaudy things. 

[Christina]

8 hours ago, FrancescaFiore said:

I've begun to really worry about the bulging veins on Darcey's forehead. The more she cries, the bigger those veins pop out and I'm a-skeered she's gonna go all explodey-head. 

Well, I hope you're happy! Now I will not be able to skip her scenes in the new season with the fake relationship with Tom because I'm waiting to see her explodey-head!

Also, Jesse is still trying to milk the robbery for attention even though he isn't getting any positive responses. This isn't from his account so it's not giving him any views or I wouldn't post it. Three totally not staged slides. Not staged in any way. We all believe you Jesse! Totally staged, I mean not staged. Nope. Completely off guard moment you were so lucky to have a photographer following you around to be able to catch it. He and Darcey should be forced to marry, like Romeo Michael Jones Sumit.

[DanaMB]

God, he is such a douche. 

[AZChristian]

Well, pretending your credit card was stolen might make for another claim to his insurance company for the costs of the robbery - value of watches and wallet, plus hotel bill that he can't pay now without his credit card.

Except that most of us would just call Visa and they'd FedEx a new card to us right away, as soon as they cancel the "stolen" card.

Honestly - a photographer follows you around because your life is so fascinating to the world?  He should change his last name to Meeskartrashian.  

[RealReality]

I love the attempted product placement.  "Dear W hotel, please comp my suite, as I have just given you some free advertising.  Also, I no longer have a credit card"

If he travels with a photographer, why weren't they watching his $60k worth of stuff? 

Also, if he had a backpack with a $43k watch, why didn't be just wear the backpack in line...or put the watch on while he was in line? 

He is a world traveler, and has been all the way to NYC.....he knows that people steal stuff all the time.  I don't come from a rough background, but if I have a $43k watch....and I'm not rich enough for it not to matter if it's stolen....I'm definitely not leaving it in a designer backpack on a Starbucks chair.....it doesn't make any sense.  

I'm mildly entertained, but also mildly annoyed that he assumes people are this stupid.  But maybe they are.  I wonder if there are people sending him money.  I doubt he wants to pay a percentage to GoFundMe, so he may be taking direct contributions from various suckers. 

Edited November 21, 2019 by RealReality

[gingerella]

Yeah, when someone broadcasts to the world I WAS ROBBED YO!!! I'M SITTING HERE IN A W HOTEL WITH NO CREDIT CARD!!! That smacks, at least to me, of trying to scam someone from something. Like he's trying to fake a claim - which, BTW, insurance fraud is a big deal and could land him in jail if he's lying...imagine how desirable Jesse would be inside a US prison, it boggles the mind, he'd be the new girl on the block...but I digress, sorry! Anyway, where was I? Oh yes, when someone posts on the internet that they've been robbed, I always think "what are they trying to get away with here?" Because the internet is the last place I'd be broadcasting that I was dumb enough to put $65K of watches in a backpack!

I've seen women go on websites and broadcast "OMG! I just got engaged last week and I lost my ring! What should I do?! Should I call the insurance company, I don't want them to think I'm trying to scam them!!!" And all I can think is "yeah, um, if you don't want them to think you're scamming them then don't be posting this shit on the internet because it does NOT make you look less culpable!" Seriously, I think Jesse really does think we're all pleebs and he's the Most Interesting Man In The World and we will all believe whatever crap he's dishing up.

Oh, and PSA: The safest place for any jewelry or watches is wearing them.

[Joan of Argh]

blah, blah, blah, blahhhhhhhh

[RealReality]

Is that essay in response to a question?

[Gobi]

3 minutes ago, RealReality said:

Is that essay in response to a question?

How did you spend your summer?

[Baltimore Betty]

18 hours ago, DanaMB said:

God, he is such a douche. 

He travels with a photographer and I doubt that shot of him looking forlorned whilst sitting on his space ship bed was candid.

If my passport was stolen I would head to the American consolute ASAP, call my credit card companies and my bank but our boy Jesse takes time to pose for photos.

I cannot believe that I have taken vacations without a photographer.

21 hours ago, LilMissKnowitall said:

Yes, I saw a Loubuotin store in an upscale mall in Boston last weekend. The men's shoes in the window were hideous, gaudy things. 

Reza from Beverly Hills Persians (whatever it is called) wears them.

[FrancescaFiore]

I'm curious - did we ever find out what Darcey does for a living? I've watched most of the old episodes on a laptop at work (shh! It'll be our little secret, okay?) and might've missed any discussion of it. If I had to guess though, I'd say she's in Real Estate. 

[charmed1]

20 hours ago, Christina said:

HA! I can’t with this dude. More and more, I’m convinced Jesse is a rapidly aging hooker. 

[Joan of Argh]

1 hour ago, FrancescaFiore said:

I'm curious - did we ever find out what Darcey does for a living? I've watched most of the old episodes on a laptop at work (shh! It'll be our little secret, okay?) and might've missed any discussion of it. If I had to guess though, I'd say she's in Real Estate. 

All I've heard of is that clothing line that she owns with Stacey

House of Eleven

and apparently her dad pays for a lot of what they have.

[FrancescaFiore]

47 minutes ago, charmed1 said:

HA! I can’t with this dude. More and more, I’m convinced Jesse is a rapidly aging hooker. 

I've never been convinced otherwise!

[RealReality]

2 hours ago, Baltimore Betty said:

He travels with a photographer and I doubt that shot of him looking forlorned whilst sitting on his space ship bed was candid.

If my passport was stolen I would head to the American consolute ASAP, call my credit card companies and my bank but our boy Jesse takes time to pose for photos.

I cannot believe that I have taken vacations without a photographer.

Reza from Beverly Hills Persians (whatever it is called) wears them.

Why wasn't the photographer watching Jessie's backpack at Starbucks?

[Baltimore Betty]

1 hour ago, RealReality said:

Why wasn't the photographer watching Jessie's backpack at Starbucks?

Why else would have a photographer travel with you?

[Elizzikra]

3 minutes ago, Baltimore Betty said:

Why else would have a photographer travel with you?

He could have at least snapped a few shots of the thief...

[HunterHunted]

On 11/21/2019 at 4:26 PM, FrancescaFiore said:

I'm curious - did we ever find out what Darcey does for a living? I've watched most of the old episodes on a laptop at work (shh! It'll be our little secret, okay?) and might've missed any discussion of it. If I had to guess though, I'd say she's in Real Estate.

On 11/21/2019 at 5:45 PM, Joan of Argh said:

All I've heard of is that clothing line that she owns with Stacey

House of Eleven

and apparently her dad pays for a lot of what they have.

Darcey doesn't do anything. House of Eleven went out of business shortly after season 1 of Below Before the 90 Days aired. There is no business. The only money Darcey actually earns is her salary from Before the 90 Days, Pillow Talk, Instagram paid promotions, and Cameos. The same is also true of Stacey. Their dad pays for everything else. 

Remember Darcey doesn't have primary custody of her children.

Edited November 24, 2019 by HunterHunted
To fix an apt typo

[FrancescaFiore]

3 hours ago, RealReality said:

Why wasn't the photographer watching Jessie's backpack at Starbucks?

And why weren't there any dimly-lit, emotionally nuanced photos of whoever stole the backpack? 

[Floatingbison]

And here I've been a sucker all these years, going on vacations without my own personal photographer.

[RealReality]

36 minutes ago, Floatingbison said:

And here I've been a sucker all these years, going on vacations without my own personal photographer.

Well, at least hire one who will watch your backpack while you're in line at the Starbucks.  What the hell is an entourage good for otherwise?

1 hour ago, FrancescaFiore said:

And why weren't there any dimly-lit, emotionally nuanced photos of whoever stole the backpack? 

The best part of this comment is the joke about any photo of Jesse being "emotionally nuanced"

Head in the hands, no shoes, mussed hair....that picture is about as nuanced as the old folks turning off their hearing aids and falling asleep halfway through his "Ted talk"

😂🤣

Edited November 22, 2019 by RealReality

[AZChristian]

I'm wondering why the photographer wasn't in line getting Jesse's coffee while Jesse was sitting there with his backpack.

Again . . . why have an entourage if they're not doing your bidding?

[Baltimore Betty]

22 hours ago, Joan of Argh said:

blah, blah, blah, blahhhhhhhh

All I got from it was, "You never loved me!"

13 hours ago, RealReality said:

Well, at least hire one who will watch your backpack while you're in line at the Starbucks.  What the hell is an entourage good for otherwise?

I thought that was the whole thing about a backpack, it kept your hands free to do other things.

Honestly, I think backpacks make it easier to get pick pocketed, in a crowded subway car, at a crosswalk, not the safest way to travel, I like my crossbody that I keep in front with my hand on or under my coat and oh yeah, I do not travel with stupid expensive watches and jewelry.

[RealReality]

16 minutes ago, Baltimore Betty said:

All I got from it was, "You never loved me!"

I thought that was the whole thing about a backpack, it kept your hands free to do other things.

Honestly, I think backpacks make it easier to get pick pocketed, in a crowded subway car, at a crosswalk, not the safest way to travel, I like my crossbody that I keep in front with my hand on or under my coat and oh yeah, I do not travel with stupid expensive watches and jewelry.

I thought people used backpacks for the same reason.  

In all of the mournful pictures and walls of text designed to elicit sympathy (amd donations) Jesse has never quite explained why he couldn't be bothered to wear his designer backpack full of expensive jewels. 

He also hasn't explained why no one in his entourage was watching his $43k watch or why no one in his entourage could stand in line at the Starbucks.  

If I were a cynic.....I'd almost be inclined to believe that this was all a lie cooked up in the fertile imagination of a narcissist, or at the very least a gross exaggeration. 

[mamadrama]

5 hours ago, Baltimore Betty said:

All I got from it was, "You never loved me!"

I thought that was the whole thing about a backpack, it kept your hands free to do other things.

Honestly, I think backpacks make it easier to get pick pocketed, in a crowded subway car, at a crosswalk, not the safest way to travel, I like my crossbody that I keep in front with my hand on or under my coat and oh yeah, I do not travel with stupid expensive watches and jewelry.

I have been all over the world with a daypack and have never been robbed. But then again, I don't carry jewelry that costs more than my car in there, nor do I leave it unattended in public places.

[Christina]

On 11/21/2019 at 5:26 PM, FrancescaFiore said:

I'm curious - did we ever find out what Darcey does for a living? I've watched most of the old episodes on a laptop at work (shh! It'll be our little secret, okay?) and might've missed any discussion of it. If I had to guess though, I'd say she's in Real Estate. 

Darcey and Stacey are supported by their father, a millionaire who is apparently a highly sought after multi-award winning architect who also owns a lot of real estate that is rented. There was an article about him and some of his properties and other commercial properties that he designed back when Darcey first appeared on this show, and the online sleuths were able to confirm his wealth.

He had a son, who was named after him, (Michael, I think, maybe Matthew, I didn't look it up) who died of cancer when he was in his mid 20s and the dad started a cancer foundation that the twins worked for a very short period of time because they are incompetent at life. Darcey's oldest daughter works for it now, I think, because she isn't a failure at life. I suspect that his son's long battle with cancer and eventual death has resulted in him trying to give his daughters the world and spoil them, We are watching the aftermath of his spoiling but I have trouble criticizing him for it, since it is coming from a place of losing his child. They are the definition of arrested development and I'll judge the hell out of them for not trying to adult, but just have difficulty judging their dad.

On 11/21/2019 at 9:32 AM, RealReality said:

I'm mildly entertained, but also mildly annoyed that he assumes people are this stupid.  But maybe they are.  I wonder if there are people sending him money.  I doubt he wants to pay a percentage to GoFundMe, so he may be taking direct contributions from various suckers. 

That's where I am at, too. I wouldn't give him a view but since other Instagram accounts are posting it, I can get a kick out of laughing at his stupidity. The dumber he thinks everyone is, the worse he comes off. He's just an absolute loser. And humble. So very, very humble. 🎼Lord It's Hard to Be Humble, When You're Perfect in Every Way🎶

An Instagrammar found out what REALLY happened when Jesse was in Barcelona:

To your question about if people are giving him money, his photographer is acting like she is. He is soooo stupid. And humble. So very, very humble.

On 11/21/2019 at 6:04 PM, charmed1 said:

HA! I can’t with this dude. More and more, I’m convinced Jesse is a rapidly aging hooker. 

I've never believed their story of her hiring him to model for her clothing line or the adjusted story of him being her "life-coach" or "online personal trainer." We saw that horrible photo that is probably early in this thread but too scary for me to go find and repost. He's leaning in to kiss her, their skin looked horrible, the clothing was awful and didn't fit and there was something odd going on with her breast. It was creepy.

I've always thought she probably told him she would get him modeling jobs here in the US through connections she doesn't actually have, but think she found him through some escort site. The only thing that made me question it had been because none of the online sleuths found evidence of it and they have with so many of these people. Recently though, someone who claims the Maria that was in the photographs shown on the show is not the Maria that appeared on the episode went searching to find her escorting ad. I've decided that story was too fake to care about so I never actually followed his links to see if I thought they were the same Maria or not. However, he or she ran the photos of her and the two friends she had dinner with through image searches and found some pretty obvious escorting ads for one of the women, but not the other two. At that point, I though maybe the higher priced sex workers have a much more secure method of advertising. There have only been a few obvious escorting ads for Farrah Abraham of Teen Mom and it's clear as day she's a high-priced sex worker. 

The only reason I can think of for Darcey to not leak the info to some tabloid is because she knows that if it came out that she hired a sex worker her dad may cut her off out of embarrassment. Jesse is running his personal trainer business and counselling services with no known clients, yet he's running money through it. There were reviews that were found to be the exact same wording as a marketing company advertises for sale. He's being paid for something, and I don't think it's training or counselling.

I have theories. He was probably in the senior center because he was hired as a stripper or more, and that's why everyone was staring at him blankly. He was so proud of the video clip of him getting in the shower and that it was airing on the episode; claims he has an offer to be in a move with nude scenes and wonders if he should do it, creating an excuse for any x-rated info to leak from one of his jobs; is constantly traveling the world with a "special woman" who is never seen because she's a paying client or three, not actually a girlfriend, 

He negotiated for the show to fly him back to New York for the reunion of a season he was not in, probably to meet some new clients. He's just a rapidly aging hooker, who is so very, very humble.

[HunterHunted]

On 11/23/2019 at 12:24 AM, Christina said:

He had a son, who was named after him, (Michael, I think, maybe Matthew, I didn't look it up) who died of cancer when he was in his mid 20s and the dad started a cancer foundation that the twins worked for a very short period of time because they are incompetent at life. Darcey's oldest daughter works for it now, I think, because she isn't a failure at life. I suspect that his son's long battle with cancer and eventual death has resulted in him trying to give his daughters the world and spoil them, We are watching the aftermath of his spoiling but I have trouble criticizing him for it, since it is coming from a place of losing his child. They are the definition of arrested development and I'll judge the hell out of them for not trying to adult, but just have difficulty judging their dad.

He was named Michael. In contrast with his miserable sisters, Michael was engaged and finishing the police academy when he was diagnosed with cancer. He was actually trying to do something with his life. I believe the fiance stayed with him during the cancer battle, but they never married.

[gingerella]

I firmly believe that Jesse has a staff of 1, himself, and he probably has multiple accounts on multiple social media platforms to talk to himself. He probably thinks it gives him an air of desirability and thus, the masses are clamoring to have him rep products hither and yon..I mean *yawn*...

Edited November 25, 2019 by gingerella

[mamadrama]

Jesse is such a famewhore that he is now seeking out other cast members for photo ops in a bid to stay relevant.