S01.E11: The Right Thing to Do

[Sake614]

Rebecca told jack there was no paperwork that would protect them if Randall's bio parents showed up and wanted him back. So clearly that was a genuine concern for her.

[ShadowFacts]

54 minutes ago, Winston9-DT3 said:

I hope we do learn more because I would've thought an under-the-table adoption would be impossible in that decade but I think the show implied the Piersons had reason to fear losing Randall.  I don't want to go through the transcripts but in this article, Fogelman discusses Rebecca's fears and said it was a feasible possibility that William could take Randall away from them.

http://ew.com/article/2016/11/29/this-is-us-creator-randall-rebecca-the-trip/

Under the table wouldn't have happened, they would have needed a birth certificate at the very least.  Fears about having the adoption nullified, probably that would not happen under the best interest of the child standard, but you never can be sure what a particular judge will do.  Maybe some modification was possible where William could have gotten visitation rights.  I think Rebecca was afraid that all the legalities in the world might not keep her and Jack from losing Randall.  But to bring it back to this episode, I don't think an adoption would have fallen through because a house wasn't all finished, but on the other hand, most localities have restrictions about issuing an occupancy permit when certain bigger things (plumbing, windows) aren't complete and passing inspection.

[Tiger]

13 hours ago, Randomosity said:

I can't speak for the original poster, but in my book, it's not the same. You need the whole Friendly's experience :)

This!  It's like those PF Changs meals you can buy in the frozen food section of the grocery store . . . despite the commercial and the picture on the bag, my PF Changs in a bag sure as hell doesnt look or taste like it does at the restaurant.

[Guest]

What sort of adoption besides under the table has no papers to protect the adopting parents, though?  I'm not saying it would've happened in 1980, I agree that's a no, just that that seems to be the story as presented.  

Also, banks won't fund the mortgage until the house is pretty much complete.  I mean, today, the transaction won't close if even the bathroom mirrors aren't installed, which is frequently one of the last things to go in on new construction.  But this is TV drama and if the writers say the Piersons moved in before bath #2 was done, it's not going to bother me.  I don't even really mind that this is apparently a paperless adoption.   They have to get drama from something.  I think in the real world, this couple wouldn't have gotten this kid, with any agency oversight at all.  

[ShadowFacts]

41 minutes ago, Winston9-DT3 said:

What sort of adoption besides under the table has no papers to protect the adopting parents, though?  I'm not saying it would've happened in 1980, I agree that's a no, just that that seems to be the story as presented.  

I don't remember the dialogue or the scene really, but the poster above said

 

1 hour ago, Sake614 said:

Rebecca told jack there was no paperwork that would protect them if Randall's bio parents showed up and wanted him back. So clearly that was a genuine concern for her.

I would have to see it again, but I interpreted it (as written) as "we can't risk losing Randall, there isn't any guarantee we can keep him if his bio parents are found."  As if to say, whatever papers they had, wouldn't be strong enough to keep a biological parent totally away from their son.  I think that was the episode with the dojo, where she was very fear-based that all of Jack's efforts to be a good strong father would be blown to hell by William now being clean and responsible. 

[Sake614]

Yeah at the very least William never signed away his rights to Randall. He just left him at the firehouse and walked away. I'm sure a case could be made for abandonment, and clean or not, he probably wouldn't have been able to regain custody. But Rebecca was still worried.

i don't recall, did his mother die in childbirth? Take off and leave William with the baby?  Any chance she's still alive somewhere?

[Court]

Or there could have been other biological family who wanted to adopt him. I think his mom did die in childbirth.

[chocolatine]

I thought Rebecca's fear was that she would lose Randall emotionally. That after getting to know the sensitive, artistic William, Randall would start thinking of him as his "real" family and not the Pearsons, even if the adoption was legally bullet-proof.

[Guest]

2 hours ago, ShadowFacts said:

I don't remember the dialogue or the scene really, but the poster above said

 

I would have to see it again, but I interpreted it (as written) as "we can't risk losing Randall, there isn't any guarantee we can keep him if his bio parents are found."  As if to say, whatever papers they had, wouldn't be strong enough to keep a biological parent totally away from their son.  I think that was the episode with the dojo, where she was very fear-based that all of Jack's efforts to be a good strong father would be blown to hell by William now being clean and responsible. 

Right, I know.  That's why I was saying that if there no papers to protect them, that to me means that there was no legal adoption per se, which I was calling "under the table", which others said wouldn't or couldn't have happened.  But the script and the show runner interview say it was a legitimate fear that William could've legally taken Randall, which I don't think would be possible with a legal adoption.

[SlackerInc]

I don't know...if there were relatives who were never given a say in the matter, I think it could be in question even if it was originally done through the courts.  But I mostly agree with @chocolatine that the issue was more of emotionally losing him rather than legally.

[jhlipton]

On 1/13/2017 at 7:58 PM, Empress1 said:

My best friend is from the Atlanta area and this is 100% true. She asks if you want a Coke, you say yes, she asks what kind.

The ATL is the epicenter of Coke -- there's even a World of Coke exhibit you can go to (best part: sodas from around the world).  I was only there for a few months a long time back, so I don't remember if restaurants in the city called all sodas "Coke".

[biakbiak]

5 minutes ago, jhlipton said:

The ATL is the epicenter of Coke -- there's even a World of Coke exhibit you can go to (best part: sodas from around the world).  I was only there for a few months a long time back, so I don't remember if restaurants in the city called all sodas "Coke".

They do. You can see the regional difference of what we call that carbonated beverage!

[Court]

7 minutes ago, jhlipton said:

The ATL is the epicenter of Coke -- there's even a World of Coke exhibit you can go to (best part: sodas from around the world).  I was only there for a few months a long time back, so I don't remember if restaurants in the city called all sodas "Coke".

We do. 

[wendyg]

The Olivia story makes me nuts. She's supposed to be an ambitious Tony-winning actress and the star of this Broadway play. A seasoned professional. And she vanishes for a month leaving no word? a) People would be calling the police; b) there'd be an insurance company involved so the producers would get their money back; c) she'd have an understudy; d) they would recruit a new female lead to star - they've still got The Manny and a play they thought was viable; e) Olivia would know she was likely to never work on Broadway again. Or at least, not until she'd offered a public explanation and apology. Something like 20 years ago, Stephen Fry went missing from a play he was starring in in London's West End - I think he was gone about a week, was found, and it then came out that he had clinical depression. Obviously, he made it back, but I think it was a long time before he did another theatrical production - if Wikipedia is right, fifteen years or so. And in the interim he went public about his struggles with being bipolar. And even now, I bet he's expensive to insure.

[Guest]

I didn't mind that part.  I figured the play was in its early development stages, before understudy casting, and the producers decided if she was out they were, too.  I didn't think it was a police matter because her coworkers probably knew she was off having a tantrum.  But I don't watch closely.  Lindsay Lohan is known as being extremely unreliable but she still seems to get work.  

But I'm the one mildly bugged by minutiae like "a gallon of ice cream", too, so I get it!  

[ClareWalks]

Growing up in different parts of the midwest, I can very easily code-switch between pop and soda. What drives me nuts is when I go somewhere and ask for something and they have *no clue* what I'm talking about. We went to San Antonio and my husband asked for a soda at McDonalds and the girl at the counter had never heard of it. I thought "soda" was a pretty common term, but oh well. At this point I just try to use whatever word I have heard the locals say. 

[Clanstarling]

10 hours ago, biakbiak said:

They do. You can see the regional difference of what we call that carbonated beverage!

Being a military brat who moved around a lot, I usually said soda pop - splitting the difference with the regions I'd lived in, I guess.

27 minutes ago, Winston9-DT3 said:

Lindsay Lohan is known as being extremely unreliable but she still seems to get work

Not that much given her early years, and a good deal has been playing herself or stunt casting.

[BoogieBurns]

54 minutes ago, ClareWalks said:

We went to San Antonio and my husband asked for a soda at McDonalds and the girl at the counter had never heard of it. I thought "soda" was a pretty common term, but oh well.

It is, that person was dumb. What the hell did they want you to call it if soda confused them? Carbonated sugar water? 

On topic, I don't want to go another episode without Tess and Annie. We need an update on the younger one's (Tess'?) french braiding skills. Over, under honey!

[ErinV]

Pittsburgher here - YES, there were Friendly's restaurants in Pittsburgh at that time.
Coke is called "pop" here.
Yes the late 70s were difficult economic times for Pittsburgh - I think that is when the steel mills started to close, which put a lot of people out of work. 

[kat165]

Thank you for chiming in, Erin. I'm sure you've put many minds at ease. :) It's nice to hear from a native.

[methodwriter85]

6 hours ago, ErinV said:

Pittsburgher here - YES, there were Friendly's restaurants in Pittsburgh at that time.
Coke is called "pop" here.
Yes the late 70s were difficult economic times for Pittsburgh - I think that is when the steel mills started to close, which put a lot of people out of work. 

I really wish this show would do better with the Pittsburgh setting. Mentioning the Steelers is not enough. It's such a unique and interesting place. I hate that this show seems to treat it as a generic city and a generic suburb.

[PreBabylonia]

On 1/11/2017 at 10:39 AM, Lady Calypso said:

Agreed about at least the rental. I guess because I was born in '93, I don't get how different the times would have been for an adult couple in the late 70s/early 80s. I do think that not discussing the rental more was a bad call on Jack's end. I guess the late 70s did have the man of the house make the decisions and the woman still didn't have as much say, but it does still suck, looking at it from a 2017 perspective. But in those times, I can accept that it was normal, unfortunately. 

Good lord! You'd think women had just gotten the vote back then. I was a teenager in the late 70s, and women did indeed have a say in making professional and household decisions. I think Jack going ahead and making these kinds of decisions illustrates more of Rebecca's personality than anything. We've seen on multiple occasions that she falls apart under pressure, while Jack stays calm and makes decisions, although they may be the wrong ones. I think the story of This Is Us refers just as much to Rebecca's growth into maturity as it does her children. At least, I'm hoping that we see a more sympathetic side to Rebecca than we have done so far. I do feel sorry for her, having to grow up with that hideous mother, although I'm not seeing her as coping as well as Jack does. At this point, she comes across as a flower child, fun to be with but not coping well with life challenges. Jack seems to be overcompensating but I'm not sure at this point that involving her in the housing situation would be helpful. Possibly it's hormonal...can't imagine how difficult it would be to carry triplets. At some point, we should be seeing her confined to bed rest. I know a few mothers of twins that were prescribed that, back in the eighties. 

[Guest]

2 hours ago, methodwriter85 said:

I really wish this show would do better with the Pittsburgh setting. Mentioning the Steelers is not enough. It's such a unique and interesting place. I hate that this show seems to treat it as a generic city and a generic suburb.

The 6th floor walk-up did have a pretty view, but I'm guessing they didn't film any of this in Pittsburgh, right? 

[SlackerInc]

11 hours ago, BoogieBurns said:

It is, that person was dumb. What the hell did they want you to call it if soda confused them? Carbonated sugar water? 

I grew up with "soda" (in NC) and moved as a teen into the heart of "pop" country (MN), and I think Minnesotans took it when I said it as actually referring to carbonated non-sugar water.  Like "scotch and soda", with the "soda" being club soda.

2 hours ago, methodwriter85 said:

I really wish this show would do better with the Pittsburgh setting. Mentioning the Steelers is not enough. It's such a unique and interesting place. I hate that this show seems to treat it as a generic city and a generic suburb.

I agree.  I have visited Pittsburgh many times and really like the city.  One aspect that's interesting as you move around, especially if going between the city and the suburbs, is that you are regularly driving through long tunnels carved right through sizable mountains.  That gives a flavor we're not seeing there.  They ought to at least use some establishing shots with a few older cars coming in and out of those tunnels.

[biakbiak]

13 hours ago, BoogieBurns said:

It is, that person was dumb. What the hell did they want you to call it if soda confused them? Carbonated sugar water? 

I grew up in Seattle where it's pop, when visiting NYC my parents let me go up and order a drink from a vendor in Central Park and so I asked what "pop" they had, the man yelled at me, said I was an idiot and they didn't have pop, I was five. 

Edited January 18, 2017 by biakbiak

[OtterMommy]

1 hour ago, biakbiak said:

I grew up in Seattle where it's pop, when visiting NYC my parents let me go up and order a drink from a vendor in Central Park and so I asked what "pop" they had, the man yelled at me, said I was an idiot and they didn't have pop, I was five. 

Similar story...I grew up in Oregon, where it was pop.  When I went off to college in VA, I said something to a friend about getting a pop and she started laughing at me, telling me that only babies call it pop.  I've called it soda ever since....

[ElectricBoogaloo]

I grew up calling it "pop" in Chicago and Mr. EB sometimes refers to that as my midwest roots (same goes for when I say bathing suit and sofa vs. swimsuit and couch).

On 1/13/2017 at 10:21 PM, Winston9-DT3 said:

I think if you stopped at a boutique ice cream shop like Friendly's that would've been the biggest size sold.  I think it still is.  We don't have them here but I'm guessing it's like Culver's. 

A friend of mine worked at Baskin Robbins when we were in high school and although they had prepacked ice cream in the freezer that you could buy, there were always people who requested hand packed quarts. She used to complain because she was tiny so it was a lot of work for her to scoop ice cream out of those huge tubs, especially when they were less than half full. I feel the same way when I'm trying to get the last sock at the very bottom of my washing machine.

On 1/14/2017 at 6:00 AM, MaryPatShelby said:

OMG this was my house!  We always had a gallon of vanilla in the freezer, and had ice cream for dessert every night.  My brothers and I always asked for chocolate, and my mom's response was that chocolate was more expensive than vanilla.  Imagine my dismay when I found out that wasn't true!  I never did find out the real reason she wouldn't buy chocolate, but to this day I love vanilla more than any other flavor.

Hahaha, I remember I once asked my mom if we could buy something (we were either at the grocery store or a place like Target). She looked at the price tag on the shelf and said we couldn't buy it because it wasn't on sale. I was maybe three or four at the time so I interpreted that to mean that people were only allowed to buy merchandises that was on sale that week. It wasn't until a few years later that I realized my mom just meant she wasn't going to buy that particular item until it was discounted. In my defense, there was a store in our area that had a catalog and a showroom so you could look at all the merchandise but if you wanted to actually buy something, you had to go to the desk at the customer service area and then they would go in the back to get it for you.

We always had at least one gallon sized container of ice cream in the freezer. There were three kids in my family so we went through ice cream like crazy. My mom insisted that we each had to drink an entire glass of milk at dinner, which we all found boring. But she would let us make milkshakes (not with a blender though - we would just scoop a bunch of ice cream into a glass, add milk, and then stir until it was milkshake consistency) so we could could demolish an entire gallon of ice cream in a week.

I imagine that Rebecca didn't intend to eat all that ice cream at once (regardless of whether it was a gallon or a half gallon). Pints and quarts were not as popular in the 70s and early 80s as they are now. Ben & Jerry's really made smaller ice cream containers popular.

On 1/16/2017 at 8:27 AM, Tiger said:

This!  It's like those PF Changs meals you can buy in the frozen food section of the grocery store . . . despite the commercial and the picture on the bag, my PF Changs in a bag sure as hell doesnt look or taste like it does at the restaurant.

I used to love going to White Castle when I was a kid and it was one of the things I missed the most when I moved to California. About ten years ago, I was at the grocery store and saw that they sold a six pack of frozen White Castles. I was totally freaking out with excitement. It's definitely not the same thing as having a fresh hot slider in person, but when you're almost 2000 miles away, they're not bad.

[Clanstarling]

1 hour ago, ElectricBoogaloo said:

I feel the same way when I'm trying to get the last sock at the very bottom of my washing machine.

Me too. I now use rubber tipped cooking tongs to get to the bottom. Makes it much easier.

[Randomosity]

1 hour ago, ElectricBoogaloo said:

I grew up calling it "pop" in Chicago and Mr. EB sometimes refers to that as my midwest roots (same goes for when I say bathing suit and sofa vs. swimsuit and couch).

Whoa. I love regional dialect variations, but I never realized bathing suit/swimsuit was considered one of them! Especially considering your example for the midwest - I've got NY roots going back several generations and I have always said bathing suit. (And couch.)

[BoogieBurns]

20 minutes ago, Randomosity said:

Whoa. I love regional dialect variations, but I never realized bathing suit/swimsuit was considered one of them! Especially considering your example for the midwest - I've got NY roots going back several generations and I have always said bathing suit. (And couch.)

My dad is a Navy brat, so he grew up using all the variations of everything (and now so do I). Soda/Pop/Coke is all the same to me, Swimsuit/Bathing suit/Swimming suit as well as Sofa/Couch. We even pronounce envelopes as ONvelopes and INvelopes, and coupons as QUEpons and COOpons. We have no region!

We have a new episode now, so I'll stop talking utter nonsense over here. Thanks guys! 

[Eeksquire]

Quote

In my defense, there was a store in our area that had a catalog and a showroom so you could look at all the merchandise but if you wanted to actually buy something, you had to go to the desk at the customer service area and then they would go in the back to get it for you.

Service Merchandise! Oh man, that was the catalog I used to make my Christmas list for Santa every year (no Toys R Us near me until I was in middle school!)

[Clanstarling]

9 hours ago, BoogieBurns said:

My dad is a Navy brat, so he grew up using all the variations of everything (and now so do I). Soda/Pop/Coke is all the same to me, Swimsuit/Bathing suit/Swimming suit as well as Sofa/Couch. We even pronounce envelopes as ONvelopes and INvelopes, and coupons as QUEpons and COOpons. We have no region!

We have a new episode now, so I'll stop talking utter nonsense over here. Thanks guys! 

So much this - growing up as a brat, we used every variation. I didn't even know they were regional (though oddly, despite my father being from the deep south, we never called soda/pop "coke"). But the confusion with sofa/couch, the pronunciations of coupon and envelopes, I never related those to regions either.

[BoogieBurns]

36 minutes ago, Clanstarling said:

So much this - growing up as a brat, we used every variation. I didn't even know they were regional (though oddly, despite my father being from the deep south, we never called soda/pop "coke"). But the confusion with sofa/couch, the pronunciations of coupon and envelopes, I never related those to regions either.

Pronouncing pecan is actually the funniest one to me. I live in Texas, where they are Pee-CANs. My family mostly calls them Puh-Cahns, and I am this mashup of PEE-Cahn. I never knew anything was regional, until people called me a Yankee for how I said words. What part of Southern California and Central Texas makes me a Yankee? Lol!

[MaryPatShelby]

1 hour ago, Clanstarling said:

But the confusion with sofa/couch......

not to mention "davenport". That's what my Chicago-born grandma called it.

[jhlipton]

20 hours ago, biakbiak said:

They do. You can see the regional difference of what we call that carbonated beverage!

"Soda", in NYC and California, is one of those "effete libral" words, isn't ? 

Just now, SlackerInc said:

I grew up with "soda" (in NC) and moved as a teen into the heart of "pop" country (MN), and I think Minnesotans took it when I said it as actually referring to carbonated non-sugar water.  Like "scotch and soda", with the "soda" being club soda.

My wife refers to "club soda water" -- that may be her St Louis roots.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

12 hours ago, Eeksquire said:

Quote

In my defense, there was a store in our area that had a catalog and a showroom so you could look at all the merchandise but if you wanted to actually buy something, you had to go to the desk at the customer service area and then they would go in the back to get it for you.

Service Merchandise! Oh man, that was the catalog I used to make my Christmas list for Santa every year (no Toys R Us near me until I was in middle school!)

Yes! Thank goodness you knew what I was talking about. I remember walking around the showroom with my mom. It was driving me crazy that I couldn't remember what it was called!

[photo fox]

Can we get back on topic, please? If it's not about the episode, try the Nostalgia, Social Issues, or Small Talk threads. Thanks! 

[Miasmomma]

On 1/11/2017 at 1:37 AM, pennben said:

I absolutely hate the TV trope of a husband "surprising" his wife with a home purchase. Does it ever occur to anyone that the wife might like to have a say in choosing the home she'll be living in long-term?

 

My ex's father surprised his wife and kids with a new house and let me tell you not only wasn't she happy about it.  In fact,  as the story went she didn't really speak to her husband for about a year.  

[SueB]

On 1/16/2017 at 10:57 AM, ItCouldBeWorse said:

After the news about the triplets, when Jack was at the table looking over their finances and Rebecca asked him what he was doing, he gave her a non-specific answer. Later, when showing her the house, he told her that they had had more money than he had thought, or words to that effect.  Clearly, Rebecca had no clue as to the specifics of their finances and left it all to Jack to handle, including apartment rental and house purchase.  That was probably how her parents did it, and since Jack was the one earning the bulk of the family income, that's how they did it, too.

THIS. 

Everything I see leads me to think that when Jack dies, Rebecca is in financial dire straits and had no clue.  Which could mean she married Miguel for financial stability.  And the kids would resent the hell out of that. 

[OtterMommy]

1 hour ago, SueB said:

THIS. 

Everything I see leads me to think that when Jack dies, Rebecca is in financial dire straits and had no clue.  Which could mean she married Miguel for financial stability.  And the kids would resent the hell out of that. 

Replying in the Speculation thread....

[Snickerdoodle]

My nitpick for this episode is that PA does not have front license plates.  

[Superpole2000]

On 1/15/2017 at 2:25 AM, HeyThere83 said:

Don't like the writing when it comes to Olivia/Kevin. It seems a mess and all over the place like they're not sure what to do. At first it seemed like they were going for a hate turns to love story, and eventually showing different sides of the Olivia character. Now it seems like they want her to be an evil villain out to destroy the true love between Kevin and Sloane. Weird wig and everything. BASIC.

It was especially bad when Kevin said, "...even if it's not what you want to do..." in reference to continuing to date Sloane. Who the hell would say that? That was really out of character to say something so mean and just seemed a horrible plot contrivance to fuel a love triangle.

One of my favourite things about this show is the person selecting the music. They are obviously a Nick Drake fan, with two of his songs being featured in the last few episodes. Good stuff. Of course, I was already in on the music when they blasted Romeo and Juliet in the first family scene this season.

[millahnna]

Waaaay late to the party but my nitpick is that in the flashback where they find out they are having triplets, as they sit down Jack asks the doctor if this is when they find out they are having a boy or a girl.  Before the mid/late 80s, finding out the sex of your baby was called giving birth.