S08.E01: It's Worse Than We Thought

[Wings]

What I would like to see happen. Kody and Meri fall madly in love and have a secret affair as happened on Big Love.  Robin loses it.

And she slaps the shit out of Aurora for Nowhere. 

Edited December 1, 2016 by wings707

[Granny58]

24 minutes ago, wings707 said:

Who does Aurora belong to?  I can only keep Meri's family straight. Honestly, I don't even try. I call my son Stewie often and that is the dog's name. 

Robyn, from her first husband (the evil bastard who they were terrified of, and to whom they promptly sent the kids for daddy time after the "legal" wedding).

[Natalie68]

19 hours ago, MarysWetBar said:

Me too actually!

It was the delivery I didn't much care for haha

It was said in such a mean way and with others in the room to witness. That's what bothered me so much about it. I don't have daughters, I have sons, so maybe all of you with daughters don't find it as rude or mean as I did. Yes Meri really embarrassed her daughter. That can't be disputed. But her issue seems to be that Meri didn't do what Mariah told her to do. Mariah wasn't obeyed, so to speak. 

Meri is a lot of things and messed up for sure, but as a daughter, I could have never kicked her while she was already so far down,regardless of how angry I was with her. If I saw my mom an emotional mess and basically shunned by everyone else, even if I didn't agree with what she did, I would publicly show her loyalty and love. We could scream about it in private.

And she's honestly the LAST person on earth who should be ridiculing someone's appearance. She has a face on her like a can of smashed assholes.

I don't like snarking on features one was born with (however, your description had me LMAO!) BUT when they showed Mariah and HER eyebrows I thought sweetie, you need to take a gander at YOUR own eyebrows which look very badly done before you say one more word.  Both Meri and Mariah are somewhat unfortunate looking and need to learn how to work with what they have better.  Ladies, there are people whose job it is to teach these skills.  Or even some YouTube vids.  If you are going to do it and care do it right or you look like a crazy person.

[theironwoman]

Also, I knew Kody was a douche but his claims not to remember things he said to Meri was like a screaming siren. I know it was partly to save face in front of the camera (because we all thought he was the Ultimate Husband before /s) but it's also gaslighting, pure and simple. I wish Meri would leave.

[Natalie68]

7 hours ago, Normades said:

You see, THIS is why Mariah is owed an apology, an explanation, and lots of healing time to rebuild trust.  Meri put her right in the middle of this mess.  She told Mariah about it and even took her to Disneyland with her to meet her Prince (Princess?) Charming.  I think she probably put her on the phone with him --- because there are reports that she put Solomon on the phone with him, too, so why not. Meri seems like the kind of person who wanted to flaunt this affair like a 12 year old.  Mariah could not tell anyone without betraying her mother, the person she was closest to.  She was in a no win situation and now her father, who she seems to love, and her other "mothers" feel betrayed by her silence.  This has broken the trust between Mariah and the other adults, through no fault of Mariah's.  Meanwhile, Meri plays the victim and expects everyone to move along and treat her the same as before.  No willingness to work on rebuilding trust or taking any responsibility.  No concern for her daughter or the other children she hurt.  She is beyond selfish and despicable. 

No matter how much I don't like Kody or this lifestyle, at least he has been up front about it.  I can't help but wonder how Mariah's silence about this affair has affected her relationships with her siblings.  The ripples of an affair are very far reaching.  

BTW - I don't think she is acting hurt.  I think she IS hurt.

As someone who knew about a parental affair and was asked about it by the non cheating parent, its an awful position (my sister and I were introduced to this person at a coffeeshop while my mom was at home grieving for her mom who had just died).  My sisters and I finally had to tell our father we will not lie for you.  She knows and we are not going to cover any longer.  You tell her or we will.  It was torture to our mom but she knew without us saying anything (she was also dying of cancer).  It took years to forgive our dad.  We loved him but he put us in an awful position.  I do see what Mariah's issue is.  

Kids never need to be part of a parents drama.  Meri needs to make it up to her for putting her in the position of secret holder.  Then they need to move on.  Hopefully away from Kody.

[crgirl412]

6 minutes ago, Natalie68 said:

As someone who knew about a parental affair and was asked about it by the non cheating parent, its an awful position (my sister and I were introduced to this person at a coffeeshop while my mom was at home grieving for her mom who had just died).  My sisters and I finally had to tell our father we will not lie for you.  She knows and we are not going to cover any longer.  You tell her or we will.  It was torture to our mom but she knew without us saying anything (she was also dying of cancer).  It took years to forgive our dad.  We loved him but he put us in an awful position.  I do see what Mariah's issue is.  

Kids never need to be part of a parents drama.  Meri needs to make it up to her for putting her in the position of secret holder.  Then they need to move on.  Hopefully away from Kody.

((((Natalie68))))

[Natalie68]

3 hours ago, MrSmith said:

Absolutely. Several posters, including me, have posted about his (and hers) sense of entitlement. Other posters have mentioned they got a controlling vibe from him, as well. I did not, but maybe I'm just dim in this regard. :)

I got a controlling vibe from him.  There is something about the way he clings to her (was witness to a domestic abuse situation at an event and the dude was holding/stopping this person that was eerily similar in the way he clings to M) and what he was saying about the loan for the wedding.  Manipulative.

[DakotaJustice]

51 minutes ago, ghoulina said:

Yea, what is she feeding the kids? Saltines with stolen ketchup and mustard packets spread on top?

Naw, just sending them to her new bestie Christine's house for meals.

[Natalie68]

7 minutes ago, crgirl412 said:

((((Natalie68))))

Thanks!  It took me til I was about 40 to realize just how effed up my family is/was (and loads of therapy)!  Its no wonder out of 3 girls my parents only had one grandchild.  Our lives have truly been a Dateline episode and if I wrote it all down people would think I was making it up.  I know I would give it a side eye!  

[ghoulina]

44 minutes ago, DakotaJustice said:

Naw, just sending them to her new bestie Christine's house for meals.

I hope they don't like toast. 

[FairyDusted]

I haven't watched since Maryswetbar. Being a long time resident of LV, I oddly dislike my town on trash tv. 

Heeeee! I hadn't heard about the Robin kody marriage! WTH?

[toodles]

2 hours ago, laurakaye said:

I remember the grocery money comment, too...as if it's perfectly normal to have a spare $5,000 in "grocery" money sitting around.

Robyn is like the John Dillinger of the Brown family...walk in with a smile, take all the money with a wink, and saunter away with no one having a clue what just happened.  

Christine had to include more grocery money as part of the wrestling mat discussion.  Along with making her children's father spend more time with them.  And let's not forget the time Christine wanted money to visit her sick father and Kody told her to save her grocery money.  I guess the extra grocery money Robyn had was her share of the MSWC profits.

[3girlsforus]

3 hours ago, ghoulina said:

I think he cares. He appeared to be seething with rage last season. But the way they are presenting this to the viewers does not allow him to fully express how much he cares. They still haven't been fully open about the extent of this thing. It was just an internet trickster that Meri thought was her friend. They don't mention "love" and all the plans on the show. So Kody can't really act as outraged as he probably is inside.

I think he cares but I don't think he cares that his relationship with Meri sucks. I think he cares that she dared care about someone else. I think he cares that she showed people that he isn't such a stud that has no trouble with making 4 women happy. I think he cares that now he has to deal with her. But I don't think he cares about the marriage or why Meri felt alone enough to go looking elsewhere

[CalicoskiesNC]

I have been in the banking biz for 25 yrs. Never have I seen anyone like Tony in a branch banking environment. He spoke with poor English, seems very unkempt and not very educated. Cannot see him either as a teller or customer service rep.  

[AZChristian]

39 minutes ago, CalicoskiesNC said:

I have been in the banking biz for 25 yrs. Never have I seen anyone like Tony in a branch banking environment. He spoke with poor English, seems very unkempt and not very educated. Cannot see him either as a teller or customer service rep.  

I opined further upthread that he may be a janitor in a bank.  It has nothing to do with ethnicity . . . it's all the points you made about poor English (grammar), unkempt, and not educated.  Being a janitor is a perfectly good occupation, if you are not well-educated, but I thought it odd that he didn't seem to make any effort to dress up to ask for his girlfriend's hand in marriage.

[notnowimbusy]

Anybody remember the episode, when they still lived in Utah, when Meri & Kody went out to dinner for their anniversary, and Meri brought up how he would feel if she had multiple husbands, and how repulsed Kody was with even the mention of the idea.  And yet Meri does have an affair, maybe not physical, but an affair none the less, and he just blows it off.   He could care less if Meri leaves, all that matters to him is how he appears on camera, and if he still seems in control of the family.    Laughable, considering he has no clue what's going on with his kids or his wives.

[sister7a]

On 11/27/2016 at 8:08 PM, Galloway Cave said:

Kody repeating that Mykelti and Tony are getting married too young and it is so dumb is really hypocritical. He and Meri were the same ages when they got married.

Not to mention how hypocritical it is to complain about the two weddings being "too close together."  Seriously? HE can pop out kids with FOUR women, one after the other. What does he expect? That they all will wait 1-2 years between weddings?  You got kids that are the same age, they are probably going to get married withing the same year.

[sister7a]

"You've waited 21 years to have sex..."

And they say it's not about sex for THEM.  Kody is such a narcissistic asshat! 

[Nowhere]

6 hours ago, wings707 said:

What I would like to see happen. Kody and Meri fall madly in love and have a secret affair as happened on Big Love.  Robin loses it.

And she slaps the shit out of Aurora for Nowhere. 

Please God!!

[DakotaJustice]

1 hour ago, CalicoskiesNC said:

I have been in the banking biz for 25 yrs. Never have I seen anyone like Tony in a branch banking environment. He spoke with poor English, seems very unkempt and not very educated. Cannot see him either as a teller or customer service rep.  

Maybe he's bilingual? 

He just seems so oafish. Ugh.

[DakotaJustice]

6 hours ago, wings707 said:

What I would like to see happen. Kody and Meri fall madly in love and have a secret affair as happened on Big Love.  Robin loses it.

And she slaps the shit out of Aurora for Nowhere. 

Kody's only in love with Kody, but that would be delicious!

5 hours ago, ghoulina said:

I hope they don't like toast. 

Love this and I have to admit that I enjoyed that bit in the first episode. 

She probably has a toaster oven now. 

[Marigold]

I think this was Kody's best episode. 

He came off as very real with his concern for Mykelti and still gave them his blessing.

In the discussion with Meri, I actually felt a bit sorry for him. He seemed like he was truly trying his best and Meri was just filled with hurt, rage, shame, unhappiness....Kody didn't know what to do with her and I think he really did want to make things right.  

As for Meri, I think Meri wants to be a good polygamous wife but in reality, she hates it.  Then she self hates for hating her own religion.  She signed up for a polygamous marriage and then she hated it, hated Janelle and hated herself for it.  Her intention was good.  She offered to divorce Kody for the sake of the children and then she hated it, hated Robyn and hated herself for it.  This is why we see so much bitchiness, rage and misery from Meri.  She is constantly hating her situation and then self hating for hating her situation.  It must be awful to be trapped by your own religion, thoughts and emotions.

[Armchair Critic]

On 11/27/2016 at 9:03 PM, toodles said:

Truely needs a speech therapist. Stat. 

 

On 11/27/2016 at 9:03 PM, toodles said:

And some Carmex.

Christine needs to watch that little girl better and worry less about Kodoofus. First the kid almost dies now it looks like she has skin irritation all around her mouth and her speech problems.

When Meri was scowling she looked just like Trump with that orange face.

*edited to say I forgot it started Sunday so watched it on repeat.  I just made it through this whole thread and I literally laughed until tears came out of my eyes. This train wreck is worth watching just for the posts here.

Edited December 2, 2016 by Armchair Critic

[Wings]

Random thoughts.

Meri was quit pretty when she was younger.

Robin was MIA because she has an infant. 

Kody told Meri that he tried to keep her/their relationship calm. That is a problem right there! She wants him to love her, not keep her calm. That is called  handling. It feels terrible to be handled !   She wants to feel valued. 

I have done everything to keep things calm. That is also called sweeping things under the rug you pinhead. 

Edited December 3, 2016 by wings707

[Armchair Critic]

Did the wives really not know about smashed potatoes? Why does Caleb have a shaved head in some scenes? I agree with whoever said that they are all in love with Caleb, and we know when Logan and Mariah get married they will get a lot of attention. Good luck to the rest of the kids though.

[MrSmith]

6 hours ago, Marigold said:

I think this was Kody's best episode. 

He came off as very real with his concern for Mykelti and still gave them his blessing.

In the discussion with Meri, I actually felt a bit sorry for him. He seemed like he was truly trying his best and Meri was just filled with hurt, rage, shame, unhappiness....Kody didn't know what to do with her and I think he really did want to make things right.  

As for Meri, I think Meri wants to be a good polygamous wife but in reality, she hates it.  Then she self hates for hating her own religion.  She signed up for a polygamous marriage and then she hated it, hated Janelle and hated herself for it.  Her intention was good.  She offered to divorce Kody for the sake of the children and then she hated it, hated Robyn and hated herself for it.  This is why we see so much bitchiness, rage and misery from Meri.  She is constantly hating her situation and then self hating for hating her situation.  It must be awful to be trapped by your own religion, thoughts and emotions.

I disagree that he came off as real (at all!) with his concern for Mykelti. If he was really concerned for her, then he wouldn't have "given his blessing". And he certainly wouldn't have blind-sided Christine that he was going to give his blessing. The concerns he voiced in his Talking Head segments and in private conversation with Christine were never aired to either Mykelti or her fat girly-man. The stuff he brought up in his TH's are legitimate concerns. So, why didn't he say anything about those things to Mykelti and her fa --- err fiance? Instead, all he really talked about with them is "don't have sex" and "don't get married so soon after Madison does". One thing that really bothers me about all his "don't have sex" talk is this: If he raised his daughter with his values, then he should not have to say "don't have sex" and he should not have to worry about it - at all! The fact he felt he needed to say "don't have sex" to them multiple times tells me that he knows they didn't instill their values into their daughter. And if you know that, then saying "don't have sex" is completely pointless because either she is going to have sex or she is not, and either way there is not one damn thing he can do about it.

I disagree that he was trying his best with Meri or wanted to make things right. Meri has told him on more than one occasion that she needed him around more. After the catfishing thing broke, then she pushed him away. And either way if he knew his wife better, then he'd be able to figure out what she needs and he'd be able to give it to her. But:

1. He doesn't listen to her.
2. What she says isn't important enough for him to remember.
3. He doesn't spend enough time with her in order to get to know her well.
4. They do not have open lines of communication.
5. They are not able to be unreservedly honest with each other about what they're each thinking and feeling.

All of those things mean that, essentially, they're strangers who share bills and sometimes have sex.

When it comes to your third paragraph, I think you're completely spot-on. The only thing I disagree with is that I don't think she initially signed up for a polygamous marriage. From everything I've heard, it seems like they got married monogamously and he later decided he wanted to be polygamous. Otherwise, that last paragraph is 100% gospel truth as far as I can tell.

[Armchair Critic]

Maddie, Mykelti, and Mariah with that dark dyed hair do themselves no favors in the looks department. 

[tabloidlover]

20 hours ago, laurakaye said:

Furthermore, not only did Kody and Robyn go on a lovely Hawaiian honeymoon for a marriage that supposedly didn't mean anything, Kody also supposedly married Robyn for the sake of Robyn's kids -- so he could adopt them and make decisions for them instead of their awful, mean biological father.  And in the very next episode, we saw Da'unAuroraBrianna leaving quite happily for a long stay with that same father, and neither Kody nor Robyn seemed one bit bothered by this.  Everyone acted as if this extended trip was no big dill, most notably Robyn.

So the entire divorce-Meri-marry-Robyn thing was super suspect from the beginning.  It had to have been Robyn's idea, and she presented it to Kody as "you need to protect my kids!"  She even gave him that terrifying portrait that erased their bio dad and plopped in Kody's big mug.  Kody bought it because he wanted to buy it, then he most likely guilted Meri into doing it.

Seriously, all three of these adults are so completely messed up and duplicitous, it's mind-blowing.

Laurakaye - your spelled out Brown grammar made my day!!!   Laughed my ass off - thank you!

1 hour ago, MrSmith said:

I disagree that he came off as real (at all!) with his concern for Mykelti. If he was really concerned for her, then he wouldn't have "given his blessing". And he certainly wouldn't have blind-sided Christine that he was going to give his blessing. The concerns he voiced in his Talking Head segments and in private conversation with Christine were never aired to either Mykelti or her fat girly-man. The stuff he brought up in his TH's are legitimate concerns. So, why didn't he say anything about those things to Mykelti and her fa --- err fiance? Instead, all he really talked about with them is "don't have sex" and "don't get married so soon after Madison does". One thing that really bothers me about all his "don't have sex" talk is this: If he raised his daughter with his values, then he should not have to say "don't have sex" and he should not have to worry about it - at all! The fact he felt he needed to say "don't have sex" to them multiple times tells me that he knows they didn't instill their values into their daughter. And if you know that, then saying "don't have sex" is completely pointless because either she is going to have sex or she is not, and either way there is not one damn thing he can do about it.

Agree 100%.   I find it rather telling that he didn't bother to have the no sex talk with Maddie or Logan.   Logan is plain old shacking up (you GO, Logan!) and I'm thinking Maddie and Caleb were getting busy before the wedding.   Does Kody only say it for the cameras?  Or only to the kids he thinks he can control?  Idiot

[Granny58]

10 hours ago, AZChristian said:

odd that he didn't seem to make any effort to dress up to ask for his girlfriend's hand in marriage.

odd?  or disrespectful?  Even now, after 27 years of marriage, I make sure I look presentable around my in-laws.   And not because they don't love me, but because it's just the right thing to do.  

[AZChristian]

6 minutes ago, Granny58 said:

odd?  or disrespectful?  Even now, after 27 years of marriage, I make sure I look presentable around my in-laws.   And not because they don't love me, but because it's just the right thing to do.  

My first thought is, "Well, a lot of kids these days aren't TAUGHT respect or good manners."  But IMHO, that thought is a cop-out.  I'm old, but no one taught me those things as a child.  But it didn't take long out in the world to observe and learn proper behavior.  Of course, I was watching people who knew how to behave properly.  That could circle us back to why Tony acts and presents himself the way he does.  He is NOT hanging around professional bankers.

[MrSmith]

11 minutes ago, Granny58 said:

odd?  or disrespectful?  Even now, after 27 years of marriage, I make sure I look presentable around my in-laws.   And not because they don't love me, but because it's just the right thing to do.  

This is a generational difference, then. I can see looking well-dressed when you're first meeting them and while you're getting to know them, but as you and they get more comfortable around each other there's no reason you have to continue to be dressed in your "Sunday best" just because your in-laws are around. I slum it when we're staying with my in-laws and my wife slums it around my parents. The reverse is also true: My in-laws are comfortable slumming it around me and my parents are comfortable slumming it around my wife. Of course, when it comes to my parents, they're weird to start with and so that might not be a good metric for this discussion.

Edited December 2, 2016 by MrSmith

[Armchair Critic]

I understand dressing out of respect but you would think since Tony knew he was going to be on tv he would have worn his finest t-shirt for the occasion.

[Kohola3]

2 minutes ago, AZChristian said:

That could circle us back to why Tony acts and presents himself the way he does.  He is NOT hanging around professional bankers.

And I would think that St. George is a big enough town that there would be some dress standards for business folks.   It's not like a one horse Podunk town with one bank and six bars.

Quote

I understand dressing out of respect but you would think since Tony knew he was going to be on tv he would have worn his finest t-shirt for the occasion.

Yeah, those Hollywood talent scouts are surely monitoring this star-filled series.  Sorry, Tony, if this is supposed to further your career, I think you're going to be sorely disappointed.

[AZChristian]

2 minutes ago, Kohola3 said:

And I would think that St. George is a big enough town that there would be some dress standards for business folks.   It's not like a one horse Podunk town with one bank and six bars.

I've been to St. George.  I'm from Baltimore originally and now live in the Phoenix area.  So - to me - St. George was a little "one horse Podunk town."  But there are actually 75,000+ residents there.  Most of them at least looked CLEAN (which is more than I can say for Tony).

[Granny58]

7 minutes ago, MrSmith said:

This is a generational difference, then. I can see looking well-dressed when you're first meeting them and while you're getting to know them, but as you and they get more comfortable around each other there's no reason you have to continue to be dressed in your "Sunday best" just because your in-laws are around. I slum it when we're staying with my in-laws and my wife slums it around my parents. The reverse is also true: My in-laws are comfortable slumming it around me and my parents are comfortable slumming it around my wife. Of course, when it comes to my parents, they're weird to start with and so that might not be a good metric for this discussion.

Oh, I don't dress in my Sunday best!  But I don't wear a wrinkled T-shirt, have unkempt hair and (in his case) have a scraggly almost-beard.  (well, I'm menopausal, so maybe I do have that beard and nobody's telling me - bless their hearts).

5 minutes ago, Kohola3 said:

And I would think that St. George is a big enough town that there would be some dress standards for business folks.   It's not like a one horse Podunk town with one bank and six bars.

and that is exactly the type of town my in-laws are from.....and know how to present themselves.  Again, I'm not talking suits and dresses.  But wearing clothes that don't look like they've been pulled dirty out of the hamper.

[MrSmith]

3 minutes ago, Kohola3 said:

And I would think that St. George is a big enough town that there would be some dress standards for business folks.   It's not like a one horse Podunk town with one bank and six bars.

LOL! You know, I lived in a town like that just a few years ago. And it really was a "one horse Podunk town"; the population when we moved there was just over 1300 people and by the time we moved away it had sunk to just over 1100. And it did have one bank, six bars, and zero stoplights (it was in Wisconsin, which explains the number of bars). The ladies in the bank actually were always dressed very well and exactly like I remember tellers dressing when I lived in Milwaukee and Minneapolis. I have to say I still miss living in that little town, too....

3 minutes ago, Granny58 said:

Oh, I don't dress in my Sunday best!  But I don't wear a wrinkled T-shirt, have unkempt hair and (in his case) have a scraggly almost-beard.  (well, I'm menopausal, so maybe I do have that beard and nobody's telling me - bless their hearts).

This made me actually LOL. Thankfully, there aren't many people in the office, yet. Last Thanksgiving (2015), we stayed at my brother-in-laws and I didn't even get out of my pajamas on Thanksgiving. (No reason to. We weren't going anywhere, but I did take a shower!) Of course, I have no hair (been shaving my head for almost 20 years and, even if I hadn't, I would be by now) so I don't have to worry about how my hair looks. :D But I do remember making sure I looked presentable early on during my relationship with my wife. We're more than 20 years along now and so that's less of a concern. :)

[Kohola3]

8 minutes ago, AZChristian said:

But there are actually 75,000+ residents there.

The closest town to me has a whopping 3000 people and there are 3 banks.  In the two I have visited, every teller was appropriately dressed for business.  Of course, it wasn't in the "wild west" so maybe standards are different there.  But, again, it would seem that "asking for her hand" would be an occasion to put your best foot forward.

[AZChristian]

I've been cleaning my hospitalized (almost hoarder) brother's apartment this week.  I dress better for that than Tony dressed to visit his girlfriend's family and ask permission to marry her.  His appearance was just not appropriate for (1) a serious meeting with her father, (2) dinner with the family when you're still in "courtship" mode, and (3) filming for a television show.  JMO.  Maybe since it's a "reality" show, he dressed like he really is in real life.  Unfortunate.

[VedaPierce]

On November 30, 2016 at 4:50 PM, wings707 said:

Well that is part of the teen/early 20s behavior, it is in all the books. It is a step in breaking away.  Smacking is never a solution. 

----------------------

Mariah felt she was holding a big secret and if it got out it would impact her mom. She was protecting her by not telling anyone. 

...and SUCH an unfair position to put your kid in! What a tough burden Mariah had to carry! Yuck! Selfish selfish Meri! Big deal, Mariah took a little swipe at her stupid eyebrows, look at what her own MOTHER put her through. 

[MrSmith]

9 minutes ago, AZChristian said:

I've been cleaning my hospitalized (almost hoarder) brother's apartment this week.  I dress better for that than Tony dressed to visit his girlfriend's family and ask permission to marry her.  His appearance was just not appropriate for (1) a serious meeting with her father, (2) dinner with the family when you're still in "courtship" mode, and (3) filming for a television show.  JMO.  Maybe since it's a "reality" show, he dressed like he really is in real life.  Unfortunate.

I definitely agree (though my previous posts may not have sounded that way). He definitely doesn't know his potential in-laws well enough to be slumming it around them. Especially when he's there to ask such an important question. I mean, even after 21 years (of combined dating, engagement, and marriage) to my wife, if I had something important to ask my in-laws, then I would be sharply dressed for it. And that's without even the merest possibility of TV cameras around!

[VedaPierce]

On November 30, 2016 at 6:04 PM, Lm2162 said:

Hopefully your mother didn't raise you in a cult, have a public affair and then deny it, though, lol. 

What drives me nuts about this is that Kody seems like it's just fine because no sex actually happened, even though they sexted, planned sex, planned a relationship and had phone sex. In addition to saying "I love you" repeatedly and planning secret rendezvous. So basically because this "dude" didn't have literal intercourse with his "wife" or impregnate her--just, you know, made her fall in love and plan to leave her marriage--Kody doesn't mind? Shows what he thinks about marriage, honestly. And it's not pretty. 

That, and it may also be a way of justifying his still staying with her, and an attempt to spackle over this scandal....a way of saving face, protecting his ego in front of the world. Like he's trying to alter reality. 'See? No sex took place so no affair, no cheating, nothing happened'. Remember he thinks if you don't think about it, it doesn't exist. Real honest bunch here. So in touch with reality. 

[Armchair Critic]

Kody looked like a wimp having to hide behind "Nancy" instead of manning up and taking responsibility for his share in the problems with Meri. I have never been a Meri fan but that made me want her to get her act together and leave him in the dust.

[laurakaye]

1 hour ago, AZChristian said:

My first thought is, "Well, a lot of kids these days aren't TAUGHT respect or good manners."  But IMHO, that thought is a cop-out.  I'm old, but no one taught me those things as a child.  But it didn't take long out in the world to observe and learn proper behavior.  Of course, I was watching people who knew how to behave properly.  That could circle us back to why Tony acts and presents himself the way he does.  He is NOT hanging around professional bankers.

Tony looked sloppy, unkempt, sweaty and unshowered.  But then, that's how Kody comes across every time I see him, too.  And this is why I LOL in glee that Kody is essentially looking at himself in the mirror when he talks with Tony.

[3girlsforus]

The thing with Tony's appearance isn't even so much about 'dressed up' or not dressed up. I am FAR from a fashion plate and I spend most of my time in sweats etc (we homeschool so I am home a lot). In fact just last week I put on a dark pair of jeans/khakis and a sweater and my kids wanted to know why I was so dressed up. LOL. Still - if I am going somewhere I wear CLEAN clothes. Maybe his clothes were clean but he keeps everything he owns wadded up in a laundry basket, but the way he presented himself was that he grabbed the nearest thing off the floor and hadn't showered in a week. 

[laurakaye]

Not sure if this is the place for this, but I had a minor lightbulb moment watching the preview for next week concerning the fact that Meri and Janelle can barely stand to be in the same room together, let alone sit on the same couch.  Janelle keeps talking about how being vulnerable with Meri is basically her worst nightmare, and Meri seems to feel the same about Janelle.

I'm thinking that this HAS to go back to when Janelle divorced Meri's brother and ended up married to Kody.  I don't know if this issue has ever been covered on the show, and I think it may have been barely skimmed in their book.  But in addition to all the other emotional baggage everyone in this family carries, the fact that Janelle left Meri's brother for Meri's husband is all kinds of messed up.

I would be riveted to my television if the two of them would discuss how on earth this came to be in the first place.  If I recall, Janelle's mom had already taken up with Kody's dad, and Kody's dad was trying to hook Janelle up with one of Kody's brothers.  But Janelle wanted Kody.  WHY?  Why why why would she take up with her ex sister-in-law's husband?  This simply has to be at the heart of why these two cannot stand each other, even after 25+ years.

[MrSmith]

@laurakaye I agree and I would also like to hear more about their early years. The benefit to them of discussing those times on TV (other than the benefits of generally honestly discussing those early times) is that doing so would humanize them more and it might make them more likeable. And they certainly need to be more likeable, even if they'll never meet most of us ever in their lives.

[Tabbygirl521]

1 hour ago, MrSmith said:

This is a generational difference, then. I can see looking well-dressed when you're first meeting them and while you're getting to know them, but as you and they get more comfortable around each other there's no reason you have to continue to be dressed in your "Sunday best" just because your in-laws are around. I slum it when we're staying with my in-laws and my wife slums it around my parents. The reverse is also true: My in-laws are comfortable slumming it around me and my parents are comfortable slumming it around my wife. Of course, when it comes to my parents, they're weird to start with and so that might not be a good metric for this discussion.

But wouldn't you have dressed up at least a little bit if you were going to ask your prospective FIL's blessing? I get dressing normally the rest of the time - I live in jeans myself. Of course, Tony the Tiger didn't plan to heed anything Kody had to say, so "respect" probably wasn't much of an issue. 

[Wings]

I didn't know all of these details laurakaye, I think you nailed it.  I never got the impression he was in love with her. He set out to collect wives, kind of like Amazon one click shopping. 

[MrSmith]

2 minutes ago, Tabbygirl521 said:

But wouldn't you have dressed up at least a little bit if you were going to ask your prospective FIL's blessing? I get dressing normally the rest of the time - I live in jeans myself. Of course, Tony the Tiger didn't plan to heed anything Kody had to say, so "respect" probably wasn't much of an issue. 

Yes, I would have. Apparently, I have not clearly stated that position and I apologize for communicating imprecisely. Definitely I would have dressed up for such an occasion. I dressed nicely when I was around my future in-laws while dating my wife (prior to engagement) and usually also while we were engaged. (It was a longer engagement and so that wasn't always true as the wedding date approached.)

[DakotaJustice]

I think it comes down to the values that were instilled in a person during their childhood. I get the impression that FT is sloppy because he was raised that way. But what puzzles me is that Mykelti was all into fashion not that long ago... She's just as sloppy as he is.