All Episodes Talk: All Rise

[Silver Raven]

Man, JJ kicked an audience member out in this morning's rerun.  The guy was shocked, and we weren't shown what he had done to draw down her wrath.

[27bored]

Below is a post I never posted...but it was saved in my browser. I wish I knew what episode this was...

Quote

1st case: I was getting tired of low-budget Britney and K-Fed arguing with each other. I didn't care what happened to her clothes or his RV. They kept arguing with each other like they haven't ever been anywhere. I think the dad was lying, too.

2nd case: Didn't watch it, but laughed because the Defendant's last name was "Dykes". Heh. I'm 12.

3rd case: Hmm. The Defendant was a real piece of work, buuuut...I was getting sack-of-crazy vibes from the Plaintiff. He said he caught her in bed with another guy and to make it up to him, she bought a motorcycle. Well, she did buy it, but kept the pink slip. He got caught riding it and it was impounded. It's not like he kept the bike or even really had it for long, so...I don't know how much of a user he is. I actually think he should've gotten something on his defamation suit. Even if she did buy him a bike and seemed like he was manipulating her, that's not really a reason to go around the Internet talking shit about him. She was crying and shit about wanting to warn other women. Girl, bye. You wanted people to feel sorry for your ass. And by the way, I'm getting a little tired of that. Chicks who think it's everybody's business that their man sucks need to be told NOBODY GIVES A FUCK. You don't have to broadcast your misery. It's bullshit not only because nobody cares, but also because those women are usually the first ones to get back with his ass after she dries her tears.[/QUOTE]

 

 

As for today:

1st case: The plaintiff was cute. Very cute. I didn't find her all that annoying -- just young and immature. The dude she was with seemed a little hard-core. I kinda believed him when he said he didn't damage her phone. I think she gave her mom a sob story and her mom put her up to suing him. Oh well.

2nd case: This was a weird case. The defendant showed up late, the plaintiff seemed sassy, and JJ didn't give two shits about their case. She dismissed it for basically no reason. I think she was annoyed because the chick was late.

3rd case: Bitch how are you gonna move into somebody's house and then tell him he can't sleep with chicks at his house? Dafuq? I wouldn't have agreed to that. I mean, he moved in his babymama, but I think he was trying to do the right thing by her and his daughter. But if the two of you aren't sleeping together, I mean...he's still a man who may meet someone. I wouldn't have agreed to that regardless what she said. He's a single man with his own home. He should move differently given he's a father, but play time is just that. As long as they play and then leave, I don't see the huge problem. And she shouldn't have sued him given it seems like he was trying to do right by them, but he also seems to not have a lot of respect for her if he's packing her shit up and leaving it on the porch like a disgruntled husband.

4th case: A dog case. Zzzzzz.

Edited May 1, 2017 by 27bored

[Jamoche]

Ever wonder who falls for those "Earn $$$ working at home" spams? Well, this plaintiff did - this is the sign she put up to advertise some kind of nutritional supplements - or rather the pyramid scheme that used them as the hook. Seems legit!

 

[Intocats]

1 hour ago, Jamoche said:

Ever wonder who falls for those "Earn $$$ working at home" spams? Well, this plaintiff did - this is the sign she put up to advertise some kind of nutritional supplements - or rather the pyramid scheme that used them as the hook. Seems legit!

 

And then in the hallterview, she said that every multi-level marketing business she had been involved with was a fraud and a scam. 

Why then, Madam, do you keep getting involved?

[Cobalt Stargazer]

Somebody please tell me that I imagined the woman who was suing her ex over stuff that he supposedly kept and a Jeep he supposedly dented saying 'gladfully'.

[Brattinella]

It was a horror show all around on JJ today.

[Spunkygal]

I gladfully want a chest tat that says Product of Determination. Without the tat and the piercings, she would be stunning. The red hair didn't bug me. I believe her that the dog was better off with her than with plaintiff. Glad to be getting new shows.

[Cobalt Stargazer]

2 hours ago, Spunkygal said:

I gladfully want a chest tat that says Product of Determination.

Seriously. She would have been cute without that ring in her lip and the tat, but it just looked like her determination was to make herself look like Bozo.

[Hockeymom]

2 hours ago, Spunkygal said:

I gladfully want a chest tat that says Product of Determination. 

How could you even read that? I can never read these cursive tattoos!

I can pause the TV and try to figure it out. In life, it's hopeless!

[Sarcastico]

Quote

1st case: The plaintiff was cute. Very cute. I didn't find her all that annoying -- just young and immature. The dude she was with seemed a little hard-core. I kinda believed him when he said he didn't damage her phone. I think she gave her mom a sob story and her mom put her up to suing him. Oh well.

2nd case: This was a weird case. The defendant showed up late, the plaintiff seemed sassy, and JJ didn't give two shits about their case. She dismissed it for basically no reason. I think she was annoyed because the chick was late.

After wasting 20 minutes on a broken smartphone, I couldn't believe she dismissed the 2nd case so quickly.  They were a strange pair and it seemed as if could have been a fun case.  Well, at least 1) we can add "gladfully" to the lexicon, and 2) we know there's at least 1 person in this country who doesn't know there's a 3-hour time difference the between east and west coasts.

Edited May 2, 2017 by Sarcastico

[AngelaHunter]

23 hours ago, TresGatos said:

I live behind a group home for developmentally disabled adults and from my observations, yes, yes they are.

*sigh* I guess if someone can't launch an articulate complaint (Alzheimer's patients, non-verbal adults, babies in daycare,  etc.) who really gives a shit how they're being treated? Remember the director of some facility for patients like these, who seemed to regularly physically abuse them? The def. had witnessed this, but didn't bother saying anything about it until he had no choice.

 

15 hours ago, Jamoche said:

Ever wonder who falls for those "Earn $$$ working at home" spams? Well, this plaintiff did - this is the sign she put up to advertise some kind of nutritional supplements - or rather the pyramid scheme that used them as the hook. Seems legit!

That was great. The woman's an idiot. She paid 50$ for a sign the funky def's MOM wrote up with a marker pen on a piece of dollar store construction paper and that says "UP UR INCOME NOW"!! She falls for this dumb scam shit all the time, so she said in the hall. When I see how dumb and guillible so many mature adults are, and how they can't wait to give away their money, I can see why the urge to scam them is irresistable. You just know plaintiff is going home right after the show to look for another pyramid scheme to get in on. Up urs too, lady!

 

14 hours ago, Cobalt Stargazer said:

Somebody please tell me that I imagined the woman who was suing her ex over stuff that he supposedly kept and a Jeep he supposedly dented saying 'gladfully'.

I haven't seen this one, but you probably heard correctly.

[funky-rat]

18 hours ago, Jamoche said:

Ever wonder who falls for those "Earn $$$ working at home" spams? Well, this plaintiff did - this is the sign she put up to advertise some kind of nutritional supplements - or rather the pyramid scheme that used them as the hook. Seems legit!

 

My late step-father-in-law fell for one of these.  He paid upwards of $100 for someone to set up a website for him.  It was called "Tekmeds" and supposedly you could get meds through them for cheaper than a pharmacy.  Sure.  He was under the impression that the person above him on the pyramid would refer people to his site.  Wrong.  He was expected to do all of the marketing, driving people to the site, etc.  In the end, he made zero.  He was always chasing some get rich quick thing - same with my husband's mother.  They had this bright idea once to do vending machines.  They were going to call it "R&D's Diner" and put these machines in places all over.  They were the kind that had sandwiches, etc, in them.  We kept telling them it was a bad idea and would involve a ton of work to keep the stuff fresh.  They gave up when they found out they'd have to have good credit, and an initial outlay.  Some people never learn.

[bad things are bad]

And you all wonder why those Nigerian princes keep emailing you...eventually they'll find these tiny-brained folk and waa lah! We're in the money!

[Toaster Strudel]

Did Judge Judy have to call out "Mister Bater" so many times?  How did the audience not end up in stitches?

OK  I know it's not Bater but Bader, but that's what it sounded like to me!

The case after that was with a Doctor Bader.

Today's theme was Bader!

[SandyToes]

Oh, man, new episodes!  The return of the fly swatter!  Whack!  Plaintiff nearly barfs mid-case! Blech!

 Then episode two features two cases:  Mr. Bader, and then Dr. Bader.  Those crazy editors!   Mr. Bader's ex is beyond wackadoodle. Hope (a) Mr. Bader learns how birth control works, and (b) he does take her back to court. 

ETA:  Great  minds, @Toaster Strudel!

Edited May 2, 2017 by SandyToes

[Toaster Strudel]

Barfing plaintiff might have been dope or alcohol sick.  That's my theory.

[AuntiePam]

And the child's name was Barrett -- so Barrett Bader. 

The plaintiff who got sick -- that was so weird.  He starts squinting and blinking, and suddenly there was redness under his eyes.  WTF was wrong with him?

The at-will contract/employment case -- was the doctor suing only for the return of the child support payments?  If the employment was at-will, he shouldn't have paid the guy anything after he was terminated.   So why didn't he sue for everything that was paid?  If the child support payments continued after the termination -- but no wages were paid -- then the doctor should have gone after the State for return of the child support.

[SuburbanHangSuite]

22 hours ago, Cobalt Stargazer said:

Somebody please tell me that I imagined the woman who was suing her ex over stuff that he supposedly kept and a Jeep he supposedly dented saying 'gladfully'.

I'll see your "gladfully" and raise you the one that makes me all stabby---"prayerfully." 

[Spunkygal]

1 hour ago, SandyToes said:

Oh, man, new episodes!  The return of the fly swatter!  Whack!  

And it's a new black, dignified looking swatter. Not a gauche, pastel one like my dollar store model. I bet hers is from Saks or Neiman's.

[me5671]

9 hours ago, Sarcastico said:

After wasting 20 minutes on a broken smartphone, I couldn't believe she dismissed the 2nd case so quickly.  They were a strange pair and it seemed as if could have been a fun case.  Well, at least 1) we can add "gladfully" to the lexicon, and 2) we know there's at least 1 person in this country who doesn't know there's a 3-hour time difference the between east and west coasts.

I think that second case was dismissed so quickly because the plaintiff and defendant were clearly faking.  Right off the bat, I suspected that it was staged when they showed up wearing matching light blue and black ensembles, as if they were going to prom together or something.  Then as the case unfolded, it became more and more clear that the two of them weren't behaving like real litigants.  The defendant's "I didn't know about the time zones!" was eye-roll inducing.  The plaintiff then delivered a canned retort that sounded like he rehearsed it 100 times before in the days leading up to it.  JJ must have suspected that they were fake litigants, because she said something about this being a free plane ride for both of them, didn't she?  What sealed it for me was their hallterview.  They couldn't even deliver the lines without smirking.  It became very clear that they were in fact friends and probably just did this to get on TV.  JJ has no time for such nonsense.  Nauseating.  

Edited May 2, 2017 by me5671

[AngelaHunter]

Haven't seen the MisterBater, but enjoyed the rerun today of Krazy Klugherz and the Minnesota Misfits. Ms.K needs a sedative or something - a middle-aged woman shrieking and hysterical, her voice raised to a pitch that could shatter glass, "HE BROKE MY GRANDMA'S CHINA!!! MY GRANDMA IS DEAD!!"

[Spunkygal]

7 hours ago, AngelaHunter said:

Haven't seen the MisterBater, but enjoyed the rerun today of Krazy Klugherz and the Minnesota Misfits. Ms.K needs a sedative or something - a middle-aged woman shrieking and hysterical, her voice raised to a pitch that could shatter glass, "HE BROKE MY GRANDMA'S CHINA!!! MY GRANDMA IS DEAD!!"

Her Grandma's valuable china left in the basement of a ramshackle house. Boo hoo.

Edited May 3, 2017 by Spunkygal

[Sarcastico]

Quote

Mr. Bader's ex is beyond wackadoodle. Hope (a) Mr. Bader learns how birth control works, and (b) he does take her back to court. 

Was she missing her front upper teeth?

[funky-rat]

11 hours ago, Spunkygal said:

Her Grandma's valuable china left in the basement of a ramshackle house. Boo hoo.

It's because she forgot it even existed, until she needed a reason to direct her rage at someone.  That's how the mentally unbalanced work.

As for Mr. Bader, I hope he gets custody of his kid.  His ex was the poster child for cray-cray.  Mr. Funky said he must like a "certain look" because the current GF somewhat resembled the ex GF.  Ex's constant stream of "wasn't me" was just like the kids who would be caught doing something on the school bus (friends of ours own a bus company) and they'd take the DVD to the school and the kids would still be all "Wasn't me".  Duh.

[jilliannatalia]

4 hours ago, Sarcastico said:

Was she missing her front upper teeth?

I couldn't tell if she was missing teeth or if she had a gap that would have made David Letterman envious.

[augmentedfourth]

4 hours ago, Sarcastico said:

Was she missing her front upper teeth?

I spent the entire case trying to figure that out. I'm pretty sure she was.

[iwasish]

6 minutes ago, augmentedfourth said:

I spent the entire case trying to figure that out. I'm pretty sure she was.

No I think she had the weird thing where the front teeth are tiny, the top lip obscures them and the two canine teeth next to them are much longer, therefore visible. She also had a speech impediment. The kid's dad seemed like a nice guy, not too smart, but nice enough.

[Brattinella]

Are you all referring to the goth chick?  I assumed she was a "vampire" with removable fangs.  That would explain the speech impediment, too.

[Cindylou]

I think she had Vamp fangs.

[BubblingKettle]

1 hour ago, iwasish said:

No I think she had the weird thing where the front teeth are tiny, the top lip obscures them and the two canine teeth next to them are much longer, therefore visible. She also had a speech impediment. The kid's dad seemed like a nice guy, not too smart, but nice enough.

It looked like she had prognathism (no chin) and some structural issues with her mouth. I was so distracted by those side teeth. I initially wondered if she had top teeth, but they were probably in there somewhere. Doctors/orthodontists could fix that.

I'm watching one of today's rerun cases....was "he begged me to date him" really that 40-something-year-old fool's excuse for getting knocked up by a teen? What a disgusting pervert.  I think she was really angry that her crocodile tears didn't earn her sympathy from JJ.  I hope her sons (who are in the age range of her dream man) put a good amount of distance between themselves and their mother. No one needs to be around someone that stupid and manipulative.

[Silver Raven]

Her youngest son was two years older than the father of the new baby.  I do wonder if she ever gave birth, or had an abortion, she hadn't decided which was she was going to go.  And I wonder if the teen father decided to push his parental rights, since she said she wasn't going to let him have anything to do with the baby if she decided to keep it.

[Jamoche]

Judge Faith needs to take smackdown lessons from JJ: she had a defendant who, when asked why she was driving without a license, first said it was OK because she'd already got a ticket for it, then blithely dismissed it with "everyone does that". And she wasn't being hyperbolic, she really thought it was a common thing, that the only unusual thing was to get caught. JF is gobsmacked and tries to chew her out, but she's just too nice to pull it off. JJ's smackdown, of course, would've been epic.

[SandyToes]

2 hours ago, CoolWhipLite said:

I'm watching one of today's rerun cases....was "he begged me to date him" really that 40-something-year-old fool's excuse for getting knocked up by a teen? What a disgusting pervert.  I think she was really angry that her crocodile tears didn't earn her sympathy from JJ.  I hope her sons (who are in the age range of her dream man) put a good amount of distance between themselves and their mother. No one needs to be around someone that stupid and manipulative.

Ick ick and more ick.  Could not believe this. And the other "tenant" looked like another potential boyfriend.  And a litany of disability services available.  Glad JJ pointed out the happy papa to be will be on the hook before Byrd hands over a dime.   In theory.  Hopefully.

Another poor child born into a loony bin with no say in the matter.

Bug eyed goofball who hit a tree (but not her fault!) That was another bunch of nuts. Bug Eyes crashes the car, but is so supportive of plaintiff's case against defendant!  Fun life on the commune, no doubt.

[Jamoche]

She's 40? Seriously? That is a face that has not been lived in at all. Not surprised she's dating 20 year olds - she's still stuck at that age herself.

[BusyOctober]

You all are talking about (or is that "conversating"?) cases that I'm not seeing in my area!  I feel left out. I didnt see the chinless, weird tooth lady or the 40 yo with a baby daddy young enough to ber own "baby".  

 All I got today was teen cousins fighting over some guy resulting in a broken phone then a baby daddy who cashed the vacation refund check (but did not use the money to pay any child support of course) that rightfully belonged to  his baby momma. Then a lady suing her idiot landlord for return of deposit...she got double! And finally a Super Bowl Square Squabble. The Super Bowl thing was decided correctly IMO, but I can see how this year's Super Bowl probably caused A LOT of screwed up office pools...the never before OT really threw a wrench if the pool organizers didn't account for "4th Qtr Score" vs. "Final Score" rulings.

Edited May 3, 2017 by BusyOctober

[AngelaHunter]

4 hours ago, CoolWhipLite said:

I'm watching one of today's rerun cases....was "he begged me to date him" really that 40-something-year-old fool's excuse for getting knocked up by a teen?

I think for the time being, I'll settle for reading the stellar commentary here and skip the cases. But, anyway - it seems that claiming teenaged boys somehow hypnotized or coerced grown or even middleaged women into having sex seems to be a trend. I just read a story about a teacher who claims her high school student seduced her with "big words."  Yep, no hope for the future.

http://www.couriermail.com.au/lifestyle/parenting/teacher-blames-student-for-seducing-her-with-big-words/news-story/b29f5e3e5ad2b7d5f1132020295a587f

[SandyToes]

She (on the show) was another of those "someone said they'd be nice to me and that's all that matters" gals.  So in that regard, very sad.  But still very icky.  And the young man was somehow attracted to this enough to whisper sweet nothings?! (Was it a dare?!)  I would think getting pregnant at 41 coupled WITH "congestive heart failure" would make for a pretty dangerous setup.  But that's just me and my old-fashioned value system.

[BubblingKettle]

4 minutes ago, SandyToes said:

She (on the show) was another of those "someone said they'd be nice to me and that's all that matters" gals.  So in that regard, very sad.  But still very icky.  And the young man was somehow attracted to this enough to whisper sweet nothings?! (Was it a dare?!)  I would think getting pregnant at 41 coupled WITH "congestive heart failure" would make for a pretty dangerous setup.  But that's just me and my old-fashioned value system.

Congestive heart failure, a shoulder injury, a back injury, a botched back surgery, and a surgery to fix the botched surgery.....

She probably had the baby. That would give her a new collection of excuses for not working. 

[patty1h]

Re the cousins suing over a broken phone... the courts allow 17 year olds to bring lawsuits against other teens?  I know both parents were in the courtroom, but I didn't hear that either adult initiated the suit.  

[Jamoche]

And now we know why California airhead Imogen doesn't have a license at 25: 

Describing her third driving lesson: "And I was nervous, and turning the corner I turned too much into a tree."

JJ: "So you hit a tree. And you had a permit. And the accident was your fault."

"No."

and later

JJ: "Did you fix her car?"

Imogen: "The car is fixed."

Ooh, passive voice!

[Silver Raven]

2 minutes ago, Jamoche said:

And now we know why California airhead Imogen doesn't have a license at 25: 

Aw, don't blame California on that, she was English.

[AngelaHunter]

36 minutes ago, SandyToes said:

  I would think getting pregnant at 41 coupled WITH "congestive heart failure" would make for a pretty dangerous setup. 

But he wouldn't leave her alone! You can't blame her. I mean, look at him! Who could resist that albino-looking little dweeb who should be living with his Momma? No that big, grotesque cradle-robber. No, she simply could NOT say no. Who could? I was getting all hot and bothered just looking at the spindly boy  man of her dreams, her Lancelot, her Don Juan. Oh, god - take me! Take me now!

[ItsHelloPattiagain]

Quote

Are you all referring to the goth chick?  I assumed she was a "vampire" with removable fangs.  That would explain the speech impediment, too.

I think there was a weirdo lady in the first case who appears to be missing a bunch of her front toofies and her eyetoofies were hanging too low. . . 

and then there was Elvira Minnelli whose mother bought her a cweeeeeppy black VW bug on layaway from the two semi-shady car guys. I was looking down when the case was on and when they cut the camera to Elvira-in-Training, I literally yelped in fright. 

Which reminds me. . .  the people who sell dental implants are getting wise because they are running more commercials during JJ than ever before. 

Those two cousins in the cell phone case were real winners. Fighting over the same guy, one pregnant, the other smashing a phone over her "ex"  Sounds like they are training for enrollment at Jerry Springer State University. 

[Brattinella]

I think the creepy Elvira-girl with the VW bug was the goth I was referring to.  Was there ANOTHER one?

[Taffy]

For hilarious recaps and comments of todays reruns, travel back to page 3 of this thread. (April 30, 2014). Althea Lamb. Barbara Barsodi. Kevin and Rufus. Imogene Eddington. They are all there. 

Edited May 4, 2017 by Taffy
How could I forget Imogene!

[me5671]

Man, I could not stand the female plaintiff in the Super Bowl squares case.  I have no problems with Judge Judy's ruling, and the plaintiff was *technically* correct that her numbers were correct at the end of the 4th quarter and the defendant mistakenly put "4th quarter" instead of "final score" over that column.  However, this isn't some novel betting game that the defendant made up.  People bet on football scores this way all the time, and on regular season games as well as the Super Bowl.  Everyone knows that last column is for the final score, not the score at the end of the 4th quarter.  The defendant would have probably won this case in front of a younger judge or a judge who likes to bet on sports.  

The thing that annoyed me about the plaintiff, though, was how SMUG she was.  She kept talking out of turn during the case, which I always hate.  She was also very... off.... the hallterview.  I don't know, she just rubbed me the wrong way.

[Jamoche]

1 hour ago, Silver Raven said:

Aw, don't blame California on that, she was English.

I'm Californian, so I have to regretfully admit that we do attract 'em :)

ETA - and back on page 3 when this first ran, someone said it was a SoCal over-exaggerated accent. I'm NorCal, so I'll take their word for it.

Edited May 4, 2017 by Jamoche

[SandyToes]

Oh. My. DOG!  @ItsHelloPattiagain and @Toaster Strudel  were on fire on page 3!  Cracking up so, so, badly!  The rest of everyone is hysterical, too, but man, you two were da bomb. Y'all deserve awards for those posts, seriously!

Would love to have seen Sparkle! (Was she on today? With the BarBQ Cousins? I didn't see much of that one. Trying to grade final exams. Blerg.)  She sounded pretty amazing.

I'm almost afraid someone will google Barbara B and find out she's had seventy-leven more kids.  With more teenage boys.  Still ick.

ETA:  Ooooh, top of page!  Bazinga!

Edited May 4, 2017 by SandyToes

[Spunkygal]

1 hour ago, Taffy said:

For hilarious recaps and comments of todays reruns, travel back to page 3 of this thread. (April 30, 2014). Althea Lamb. Barbara Barsodi. Kevin and Rufus. Imogene Eddington. They are all there. 

Thank you for steering us to this page and I now remember these brilliant posts! So many great zingers, but a shout out especially @ItsHelloPattiagain and five and a half gavels to @Toaster Strudel. Ahh, the good ole days.

[Toaster Strudel]

I may resume recap duties next week... I got a kidney transplant, I don't have any excuses not to anymore!