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augmentedfourth

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  1. My job assignment on Monday ticked almost every square on the Judge Judy Bingo card. To quote Stefon from SNL, it had everything! It was a hearing involving complaints made against a contractor and what, if any, repercussions he should face. It was just the last day of testimony, but damn, they were going down the JJ list: The contractor claimed the client kept wanting to add on extras and swore she'd pay him at the end. Of course, this was never put in writing because he "trusted her." (PUT EVERYTHING IN WRITING, FOOLS.) He also claimed that she stole the original contract out of his van and modified it, like adding things and crossing things out. He was eager to point out the lines that weren't his handwriting. However! When presented with the booklet of laws (some of which he was in violation of), he couldn't read from it because he forgot his glasses and simply couldn't read anything. (Despite reading the contract five minutes earlier.) My personal favorite: When asked about any other documents he had, he answered, "Oh, they're at home in my filing cabinet." It took every ounce of willpower I had not to scream "WHERE DID YOU THINK YOU WERE COMING TODAY?!?" I forget when this case actually started, but I know it goes back to at least August, because that was the last time I did a piece of it. THIS IS YOUR JOB ON THE LINE, MY DUDE. BRING YOUR DOCUMENTS. He also claims that when he went to collect the rest of the money he felt was owed to him, the client hit him in the face, chipping his tooth. I believe there was actually a police report and an order of protection, but I did not personally see either of them. The guy's wife was called as a witness as she was there when the hit allegedly happened, and she kept answering with "uh-huh" and no one called her out on it. (All together now: UH-HUH IS NOT AN ANSWER.) There was some fuckery involving photographs. But at least there were photographs. The transcript is over 100 pages long and will take me forever to edit (especially since my headers are going wonky and I need to call tech support tomorrow), but at least it was somewhat entertaining.
  2. Maybe JJ just saw Wicked, where Glinda is originally Galinda. "With a Ga!" If I were a client of the counselor plaintiff in the dating/rent for marketing work/whatever case, I would be finding someone new, despite his claims that he SAVES LIVES!!!! That was a man who is unaccustomed to not getting his way, the point where it was almost getting scary. Don't get me wrong, the defendant was no saint for accepting the rent money after knowing him for, like, ten minutes, but overall, she came across much better than he did. (Though I'm sure in his mind, it's the opposite.)
  3. Let's have a round of applause for the defendant in the construction worker case, who showed up with all her business records (that even existed in the first place), knew how to find what she was looking for in a timely fashion, and was also dressed appropriately and had shiny hair and all her teeth. She lost a few minor points at the end for arguing with JJ about her counterclaim, but was otherwise one of the more competent litigants we've had in a while. (All right, tow truck defamation guy was pretty on the ball, too, but he just had to hand over screenshots of social media posts and let those two idiots dig their own hole.) I literally said "Oh noooo..." out loud to the TV when the high school girlfriend so proudly announced they were starting a family in the hallterview. OH NOOOOOOO.
  4. Me: Why is Carisi on scene, in the van, wearing a bulletproof vest, instead of lawyer-ing in an office somewhere? Why is he running through the streets and climbing fire escapes to rescue women like that? So unrealistic! Ugh, this is such blatant fanservice! This show has no shame at all! Also me: *watches appreciatively*
  5. Maybe not enough people "mistakenly" thought they were sisters, tee hee. But yeah, all of you have already covered how repulsive this woman is and everything that's wrong with her and why she needs a good slapping. I also hope the daughter's boyfriend is a good guy and can finally provide her with some love and stability. Truck Idiot's idiot mother can also go take a long walk off a short pier.
  6. I agree with the doctor's overall point, but we said right off the bat in the Fourth household that it's not a problem that's ever going to be solved on Shark Tank. Initially we thought his continually glancing over toward Mark while Lori was talking could have been some clever editing, but then he kept talking over her while she was trying to agree with him. He definitely got flustered by what Mark said, but he was so desperate to be RIGHT that he lost a potential ally. Oh, and PSA - don't use a general surgeon for a bowel resection if you can help it. You definitely want a colorectal surgeon specifically because things can go wrong quickly and easily.
  7. I was thinking the same thing, that regardless of what actually happened, she was one of the more chilling litigants. Total sociopath. Not that we'll ever know, but my hypothesis is she was pregnant, found one of the less reputable adoption agencies, and basically sold the baby to the highest bidder. While it may not be the most legal of strategies, were I the plaintiff, I'd find a way to go steal the dog back. What's she going to do, call the cops? Chances are, if he pulls out the court order saying the dog is his, they won't do much beyond a half-assed "well, don't do it again."
  8. My memory's a bit fuzzy here, but I seem to remember a case in the past year or two where the plaintiff was a woman who had been attacked in her apartment (or rental home), had the police reports and everything, and the defendant rental company was trying to screw her over when it came to the lease, and I don't think JJ looked upon that favorably. While she does sometimes seem a bit harsh and there have been times where I've disagreed with her tone, I think her biggest issue is the women who come in with such allegations, but hey! they took money from the guy in question anyway. (And didn't pay it back, of course.) I think JJ has even said a couple times, even if a guy does start acting inappropriately, the fastest way to get him to leave you alone is to pay. him. back. Again, while I do think she can be too dismissive, I also agree with her that those types of bullshit cases do a disservice to the actual victims. My takeaways from today: For some reason, the plaintiff in the towing case made me smile when she said she was suing for $360 when the bill was only $350 because she didn't have exact change and just handed over what she had. It was one of the more honest moments on this show lately. Even JJ was like, "Yeah, okay, sounds good." I still have no idea how the contina (?) works. Or was supposed to work.
  9. Re: the dog case - While I'm sure there's some truth to the claim that Mom lets the son lounge around and do whatever he wants, I also definitely got controlling vibes off the father, to the point where I don't blame either of them for not wanting to live with him anymore. Much like Not-A-Prize Nancie the other day, Dad seemed utterly baffled when JJ wasn't agreeing with him and the case wasn't going his way. I don't think any of them are terrible people, but I also wouldn't be surprised if there was some shady stuff lurking beneath the surface. Community college sounds like it would be perfect for the son, in between Dad pushing him too much and Mom not pushing him enough. He was perceptive enough to sum it up perfectly in the hallterview - he'd like to have a relationship again with his father, but the guy DID just sue him [over something relatively petty, in my opinion].
  10. Oh man, JJ telling Nancie she wasn't a prize was amazing, because clearly no one had dared suggest that to her before. Yeah, it was rude, but it didn't make me cheer at my TV screen any less.
  11. I'd never heard of David Harbour before this, but damn, this was one of the most consistently funny episodes in a long time. What I really appreciated was that they didn't go back to their most commonly used fallbacks, like the game shows. Everything seemed fresh and original. I initially didn't love the Italian sauce sketch, but I loved Cecily's "We can go out and come back so we can have a different time, something unlike what we're having now."
  12. Man, the hallterview in the broken up engaged couple really brought it today. Not that the plaintiff was that much of a prize herself, but the defendant (who wasn't too bad looking) really downgraded with that toothless maid of honor. Oof. I agree that Ms. "Legally Blind" knows exaaaaactly how to game the system and what magic words to say. I'm glad JJ was onto her and only gave her the $300.
  13. Re: insurance and lawsuits - sometimes they do incredibly stupid things. (Or at least things that look incredibly stupid to people not employed by the insurance companies.) I had a case at work once where a mother and her teenage daughter were out running errands, and the mother got into an accident while driving the car. The daughter injured her knee (I think?) in the accident, and to get her medical bills covered, her father had to sue her mother on her behalf since she was a minor at the time of the accident. No, they weren't divorced with split custody or anything; everyone happily lived under the same roof, aside from this fuckery.
  14. No judge, no courtroom, it was just a hearing, much like a deposition. This probably varies wildly depending on location, but around here, if you're filing a claim against a municipality (like your town, your village, your county, whatever), there's a hearing first before it gets into a full-blown lawsuit. Honestly, I don't know exactly what the distinction is or what happens between the two, as that's above my pay grade. I just need to know what to stick on the title page of the transcript. 😄
  15. I just looked, and I have the same titles for today's episodes. (I have Optimum/Altice/whatever they're calling themselves these days.) Story time! So there's this attorney in the area that I'd just kind of known by sight, maybe enough to nod a greeting too from across a room, until I worked an incredibly stupid slip 'n' fall case with her where she was working for the local municipality where this happened and she was questioning the claimant in a hearing. She asked the claimant to do something basic, like draw an X on a photograph to indicate where she slipped and fell, and the claimant's attorney flipped the fuck out for no discernible reason. He objected, and then launched into this huge tirade about how inappropriate her request was. She responded to his objection, and he kept on screaming at her, just going on and on and on. When he stopped to take a breath, she simply asked, "Are you done?" Nope! He went on for another several minutes. Again, when he paused, she asked, "Are you done?" Nope! Still going! I forget what the final "Are you done?" count was, but he finally ran out of steam and she just continued on with her questions. At the end, after everyone else left, she turned to me and said, "What the FUCK was that all about?" Ever since then, we've been like BFFs whenever we've worked together. Anyway. That job came to mind today when I was watching JJ just let that idiot defendant keep ranting and raving and going on and on and on and on and on and on. It's like a toddler throwing a tantrum (and believe me, I'm familiar with those) - sometimes there's nothing else you can do until they wear themselves out.
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