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S01.E02: Fight Or Flight

Tara Ariano

By Tara Ariano
in Zoo [V]

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alias1

alias1

What havoc will the squirrel rain down upon us for every contraption designed to keep them out of the bird feeder?  For the bungee feeder? 

 

Seriously, I'm expecting this to escalate until the animals are running around like Bond villains. 

Speaking of squirrels, I have several bird feeders in the back yard (with squirrel guards) and this year we have attracted more squirrels than usual (I think they also come for my three  birdbaths because our summer has been very dry).  Anyway, my husband has been trapping them and taking them to a wooded area about 2 miles away.  So far he has transported 28 squirrels out of our yard.  (It's a losing battle, I know more will just move in).  But now that I've seen this show, I expect one morning we will go outside and there will be 30 squirrels sitting in the backyard waiting for us to come out.

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Chaos Theory
Chaos Theory

That awkward moment when you discover your puppy is a serial killer or joined a gang.

shapeshifter
shapeshifter

*Googles "Putin pet"* OMG. Putin has a pet tiger. Puuurfect!

slothgirl
slothgirl

This!   Loved it.... "Purr, purr, purr... dont mind me; I'm just a lovable pet suggling down with this helpless child.. purr" (cackles evilly inside)   "How are we going to keep him entertained fo

Kelda Feegle

Kelda Feegle

Oh how I love this show - it is shout-at-the-television entertainment! Having just come back from Botswana I am loving all the inconsistencies haha Killimanjaro? No. Black-maned lions - No. So many others.

Couple of points ...

I was under the impression that the phone dialed out when it hit the ground - eliminating the need for the lions to do so.

Botswana is getting fibre optic cabling right across the country - light years ahead of when the area in which I live is going to *sadface*

Katherine Chappell happened while I was in Namibia and didn't make the news there.

So hoping the tigers would eat kid and clueless adoptive 'rents.

Totally want to see penguins going all penguin-y on people.

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MissLucas

MissLucas

In a rare attempt to be fair to this show and limit the snark: I just remembered that I donated my last cell phones to a charity that collects them for Africa. When I first came across the idea I was surprised thinking that cell phone coverage must be pretty bad but it isn't - quite the contrary especially in rural communities cell phone coverage is superior to fixed lines. Here's a snippet from Wikipedia:

 

In 2006, 45% of rural settlements in Africa had GSM coverage. More recently, coverage has reached 90% of the territory in several countries, including Comoros, Kenya, Malawi, Mauritius, Seychelles, South Africa, and Uganda. Other countries that in 2007 reached above 50% of GSM coverage are Botswana, Burkina Faso, Burundi, Cape Verde, Guinea, Namibia, Rwanda, Senegal, Swaziland, and Togo.[2] As a consequence of the larger diffusion of GSM networks over fixed line networks, "mobile-telephone booths" are common in some areas of Africa.

So the only problem with the lions calling Oz is their lack of opposable thumbs.

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Chaos Theory

Chaos Theory

(edited)

Squirrels are ALREADY evil. They don't need to be made so by some super mutation!

My father was in a war with some squirrels and a couple of birds that were making nests in his canopy....then his house flooded. So don't say Zoo can't happen!!!!!

I still haven't figured out what the hell is going on with the show but I really don't care. I am enjoying watching when evil animals attack.

Edited by Chaos Theory
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monakane

monakane

Speaking of squirrels, I have several bird feeders in the back yard (with squirrel guards) and this year we have attracted more squirrels than usual (I think they also come for my three  birdbaths because our summer has been very dry).  Anyway, my husband has been trapping them and taking them to a wooded area about 2 miles away.  So far he has transported 28 squirrels out of our yard.  (It's a losing battle, I know more will just move in).  But now that I've seen this show, I expect one morning we will go outside and there will be 30 squirrels sitting in the backyard waiting for us to come out.

 

Squirrels can never be defeated.  Ask any dog.  Resistance is futile.

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maczero

maczero

I did find it sort of amusing that the dog set up the adoptive Dad to be eaten because of the slight of depriving him of being petted by a kid because he didn't trust that he wasn't a good dog that wouldn't bite.  

Heh.  I didn't even consider the guy was chosen out of spite.  I wonder if the other victims were assholes as well.  

 

I'm Team Animal all the way. I'm just hoping the death toll rises above 30 so I can take this worldwide threat a little more seriously. So far it feels like one of those superhero movies where the world is in peril by the supervillain and yet no named characters die. Or like Buffy every other season finale.

I think it would be a mistake to jump right into an apparent worldwide threat like hundreds of attacks happening regularly.  That said, I do expect at least one mauling per episode.  

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DEM

DEM

(edited)

Speaking of characters whom I'd like to see pecked to death, Jackson Oz and his cock of the roost act need to go.  He issues commands and directives all over the place, but the final straw was the line, "That's why I made you take this job."  Like he's the boss of his own mother. Whatever, dude.

 

Billy Burke and Nancy Drew wouldn't be half as annoying if the writing didn't force the "butting heads" angle.  It seems to follow the pattern of:  a) Billy Burke recognises there is something fishy going on, b) Nancy Drew concurs, c) BB follows a lead, d) ND suggests a next step, e) BB suddenly digs his heels in and/or dismisses the problem. It happened with the Rogue Cats of Brentwood story and then again with the lions. Makes my head spin.

 

It was nice to see that Chloe has a plot-significant role (French intelligence officer) and is not simply Oz's Love Interest.

Edited by DEM
alias1

alias1

I like Billy Burke and Nancy Drew (thanks DEM).  They make an interesting and comical team.  I don't have a problem with Kristen Connolly in this part.  But so far I'm not really a fan of Chloe being a French Intelligence Officer.  Too much of a contrivance for me.  And yes, it was funny when they suddenly switched from French to English. 

 

I love all the pet conspiracies!

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wayne67

wayne67

 

I think it would be a mistake to jump right into an apparent worldwide threat like hundreds of attacks happening regularly.  That said, I do expect at least one mauling per episode.  

 

I don't require hundreds of animal attacks but it would be nice to see one of these animal fatalities. We got implied death by dog pack in Slovenia and referenced death by lions in Botswana and that's about it. I'd like to see something actually happen. Hundreds of human deaths would leave the show too cluttered but so far it's been 30 fatalities and more people die from lightning attacks than that.

 

I'm not sure why our intrepid humans are concerned exactly.

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Guest

Guest

I'm not sure why our intrepid humans are concerned exactly.

 

Do you know how many conversations I've had about the eight shark attacks in NC in less than an month.  More than you'd think considering I and no one I know is planning to head to the beach for vacations.  I saw an explanation of why it was happening on TMZ of all things.

 

Anyone local to multiple lion maullings is going to go all conspiracy theory like Nancy Drew and Oz.

wayne67

wayne67

I'm finding the off-screen deaths to be more horrifying then watching CGI animals "maul" someone to death. Imagination and all that.

 

The differences from the book are really starting to bother me. I also hated Sum of All Fears for the same reasons. Not that I am comparing Zoo to Sum of All Fears

 

I find the off screen deaths boring. For instance how did French woman escape 5 lions on foot when one swipe of claws would sever the femoral artery. It'd probably take about 30 seconds for 5 lions to take down 20 humans that way. It begs the question how did she escape to be hanging around conveniently to warn the son of the animal conspiracy nut. Also it's beyond convenient that the lions attack the only place with the son of the only guy who came up with the idea that animals may turn on humans.

 

Or how about the doggies, did they rip out the human throats like a Dire Wolf or dog pile with teeth and claws into the midsections.

 

I like details not broad strokes of off screen violence.

 

Do you know how many conversations I've had about the eight shark attacks in NC in less than an month.  More than you'd think considering I and no one I know is planning to head to the beach for vacations.  I saw an explanation of why it was happening on TMZ of all things.

 

Anyone local to multiple lion maullings is going to go all conspiracy theory like Nancy Drew and Oz.

 

Yeah but in 2 episodes we have 3 pairing of humans, 1 pair going from Africa to Tokyo to track down some flash drives instead of simply calling that guy up and asking him to Fed Ex the stuff.. 1 guy teaming up with French Lady to ... something something slovenian dogs. Then we have zoological pathologist and intrepid reporter disrupting a meeting of the local cats...

 

Maybe it's just me but the reporter seems too biased about the Mega Corp and the African pairing seem to be going on an international road trip when they've yet to try calling that person to see if they have the things they're looking for and the French pairing has failed to convince me why they care about Slovenian dogs or Botswana Lions.

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shapeshifter

shapeshifter

...how did French woman escape 5 lions on foot when one swipe of claws would sever the femoral artery. It'd probably take about 30 seconds for 5 lions to take down 20 humans that way. It begs the question how did she escape to be hanging around conveniently to warn the son of the animal conspiracy nut...

I'm expecting it to be revealed soon that the French lady is the Fay Wray/Ann Darrow/Naomi Watts to the collective King Kong of animals.
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tennisgurl

tennisgurl

The evil cats remind me of the evil cats from Cats and Dogs. I`m waiting for their leader to turn out to be Mr. Tinkles. 

 

The animals killing plans are so elaborate! Its like if Jigsaw was really cute and furry! I love it! 

 

If the gophers attack, lets hope to God Bill Murray is on the case. 

 

Who the hell does not bother to learn the language of the kid they are adopting? What? 

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Netfoot

Netfoot

*Googles "Putin pet"* OMG. Putin has a pet tiger. Puuurfect!

 

Apparently Kim Jong-un likes to eat dog stew, so.....  maybe he will pay a visit to Slovenia.

 

Who the hell does not bother to learn the language of the kid they are adopting? What? 

 

Far more inconceivable to me is that any couple would consider for an instant, adopting a kid that doesn't speak their language.

JTMacc99

JTMacc99

So, I find it best not to think about such things as the stink from rotting corpses in dog alley or the possibility that one of those acacia trees was actually a cell tower.  But can't stop all of my rational brain all of the time. 

 

The one that keeps nagging at me is that animals really don't want to fuck with us.  Animals can win a battle against a person relatively easily. But they're boned if they want to take on people. We're indiscriminate killing machines and are really good at it.  This isn't like The Simpsons where Lisa wished for world peace and we're all out of weapons.  ("Your superior intellect is no match for our puny weapons!")

 

Having said that, I'm sure I will be able to enjoy quite a few animal hordes killing unsuspecting humans until Weird French Guy in the Alley and Videos of Insane Dad can get enough traction to wake up the human population to what is happening.

 

Also: how many different animals need to get into the mix? Dave and Tara discuss.

http://previously.tv/zoo/how-many-more-homicides-by-animal-does-zoo-need-to-be-truly-great/"> Read the story

Hee hee! If a weasel does double cross a human at any point, I will need to take the next day off from work to celebrate the general greatness of TV.

 

Billy Burke and Nancy Drew

Oh my. Nancy Drew sums her up perfectly for me.  I can only imagine how many close calls she will have with the super-intelligent animals as we go on. 

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MissLucas

MissLucas

He issues commands and directives all over the place, but the final straw was the line, "That's why I made you take this job."  Like he's the boss of his own mother. Whatever, dude.

He! I also liked how he took off to Japan without even discussing any security measures to protect his mother against a pride of killer lions roaming the Savannah. I mean that hospital doesn't even have walls. Nobody thought of getting at least semi-automatic rifles - since 5 lions (I counted them) were 'too many' for one rifle?

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ratgirlagogo

ratgirlagogo

 

Imagine how much fun it would be if the skunks got pissed off and just started running around spraying everybody.

That would be great.  On the other hand they kind of act that way now.  The amble along making tons of noise, with very striking coats you can see from across a football field, and don't really display much fear of anyone.  The only natural predators they have other than us are owls, who aren't affected by the spray.  My cousin had a pet one and if you were in his path he wouldn't go around or walk through your legs or anything - he'd bark/snort at you, then stamp his feet, then turn around and raise his (unbeknownst to him deodorized) tail - meaning he was more than ready to go to his nuclear option just to reach his food dish without having to alter his path. Every time I see (and smell) one dead on the highway I get so sad imagining them stamping and raising their tails at oncoming cars. 

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wayne67

wayne67

I'm kind of curious whether insects are going to be involved in this global hivemind. Apparently there's an estimated 10 quinitillion individual insects in the world. They might be a problem, ants in particular.

 

I wondered why there weren't any insects visible on any of those corpses, there should be maggots under the skin and flies and insects on top if they're in a bad neighborhood unsupervised. Maggots might explain the lack of smell from the dead flesh.

 

I'm imagining these animals operating with their hive mind like internet with the birds serving as scouts observing from above, the dogs sniffing out for intruders and the insects infesting gun shops and food stores to deter potential human looters and monkeys/apes serving as armed guards. It'd be like planet of the apes but the animals working together to rule the world. I do wonder if they'd keep humans like we keep cattle.

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shapeshifter

shapeshifter

I'm kind of curious whether insects are going to be involved in this global hivemind. Apparently there's an estimated 10 quinitillion individual insects in the world. They might be a problem, ants in particular...

Yeah, if this was a more serious show, they would likely have Billy Burke explain why insects were not effected. But this show is crazy, so all bets are off.
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wayne67

wayne67

Yeah, if this was a more serious show, they would likely have Billy Burke explain why insects were not effected. But this show is crazy, so all bets are off.

 

My explanation would be that insects communicate through chemical sensors or they already essentially rule the world and our presence has little effect on their day to day life no matter how many pest control people we have working full time.

 

The actual reason would be if insects were against us we'd be dead in a day or it's too difficult to find a way to combat locust swarms or ant hordes.

 

Have we settled on an explanation for the animals attacking? Is it an evolutionary reaction or an effect of the chemical pollution/ shoddy practises of SUPER MEGA CORP (I can't remember what the corporation's name is )

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shapeshifter

shapeshifter

...Have we settled on an explanation for the animals attacking? Is it an evolutionary reaction or an effect of the chemical pollution/ shoddy practises of SUPER MEGA CORP (I can't remember what the corporation's name is )

Based on this episode, I'm assuming the theories of the elder Dr. Oz (no relation to the quack on daytime TV) were correct, that it was some sort of inevitible evolutionary result to the human impact on the environment. But maybe the chemical pollutants sped up the process.
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walnutqueen

walnutqueen

Based on this episode, I'm assuming the theories of the elder Dr. Oz (no relation to the quack on daytime TV) were correct, that it was some sort of inevitible evolutionary result to the human impact on the environment. But maybe the chemical pollutants sped up the process.

 

I can personally attest to the validity of this theory.  About 15 years ago, I let my urban yard go wild.  No pesticides, herbicides, fertilizers or water (in drought-plagued SoCal, no less).  I have an idyllic wildlife refuge where the animals co-exist peacefully.  Feral cats, raccoons, possums and skunks share the cat food (with birds and mosquito fish joining in).  There is rarely, if ever, a minor tiff - mostly just a warning hiss if another species gets a little too close - and no fighting or killing of prey (well, the kitties have de-tailed the occasional lizard, who always escape with their lives).  Honeybees and butterflies love the place, too.  I like to think I'm doing something right (even though the neighbours might think it's a bit of an eyesore).  I'm fairly certain those critters won't turn on me - they know damned well which side of their bread is buttered -  and I expect a platoon of habituated wildlife and angry cats taking on all comers who mean me harm in the Zoopocalypse to come.  :-D

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Bruinsfan

Bruinsfan

The actual reason would be if insects were against us we'd be dead in a day or it's too difficult to find a way to combat locust swarms or ant hordes.

Yeah, if the insects join in we're all toast. Flea-borne plagues depopulated Europe for centuries and caused the collapse of Western civilization. Even with modern medicine malaria kills about half a million people a year and sickens almost 200 million (without the help of a hive mind coordinating attacks), yet we're not much closer to wiping out mosquitoes than we've ever been. In contrast we've scoured most of the globe clear of large predators that would normally regard us as food, and drove some large species extinct before we invented the wheel.

 

The opening verse of the Joe's Apartment theme song really has the right of it.

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izabella

izabella

Far more inconceivable to me is that any couple would consider for an instant, adopting a kid that doesn't speak their language.

 

That didn't seem odd to me.  Americans adopt children from China and Russia all the time - kids in orphanages that do not speak English. 

 

After the 90's when Yugoslavia broke up into separate countries, wars broke out and the US dropped bombs on some of the former Yugoslav republics, Americans and Brits started adopting refugee/orphaned children from those places, too, like Bosnia.  The problem is, Slovenia was NOT one of the countries where any of the fighting was going on!  Slovenia was already highly Westernized, economically stable and prosperous, and gained its independence peacefully, so there would be no refugees and orphaned children. 

 

Those parents should have at least taken out their cell phones and googled a translation dictionary!  Dumbasses, both of them.

To answer you question about what animals might come after him in Japan, how about really annoyed poodles with cube shaped haircuts? 

OMG, hilarious! 

 

That's why I don't buy the dogs turning on humans in Slovenia.  Dogs will put up with anything.  Cats are a much more believable human predator, IMO.

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JTMacc99

JTMacc99

That's why I don't buy the dogs turning on humans in Slovenia.  Dogs will put up with anything.  Cats are a much more believable human predator, IMO.

I agree, although I'll cut this show a break on that. Of course I'm cutting this show a break on pretty much everything, so I can just add that to list.

 

The way I see it, if dogs suddenly become smarter, it seems like they'd be less interested in killing us than trying to find out our secrets like "Where does cheese come from?" and "Why does that chime go off when somebody is at the front door?"

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Clanstarling

Clanstarling

Before I forget, I want it to be know that the credits have an Evil Zebra and if I don't get to see one by season end I'm going to be pissed.

The Rhino in what looked like a European street was what caught my eye from the credits. When Chloe went home, I was expecting the Rhino to appear.

 

I was under the impression that the phone dialed out when it hit the ground - eliminating the need for the lions to do so.

I was so confused by this scene. I was exercising, saw the guy start to enter Chloe's number, and then the phone lit up on the ground. I must have glanced away, because I sure as heck didn't think the lions had anything to do with it.

 

Also it's beyond convenient that the lions attack the only place with the son of the only guy who came up with the idea that animals may turn on humans.

Maybe it's part of the plan...the animals around the world hypergamma waved to find the one person they thought would catch on and understand their manifesto. LOL.

 

Imagine how much fun it would be if the skunks got pissed off and just started running around spraying everybody.

That's just summer here.

When will these evil megacorporations learn they can't just go dumping that damned handwavium wherever they want?   When??!!??

Handwavium - I love it!

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Bruinsfan

Bruinsfan

(edited)

Oh! Something I forgot to mention the other day. When Intrepid reporter Lois Lame was called away from her google search by the doorbell and something appeared to be happening to her computer while she was away, the open browser window gave me the mental image of a red panda hacker sneaking into a keeper's office and furiously typing code with its little paws to erase all her evidence.

Edited by Bruinsfan
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Clanstarling

Clanstarling

(edited)

I know it's done.  I just can't conceive of how anybody could possibly think that's a good idea.

Young children are sponges for language, so it wouldn't belong before they'd be able to communicate. But I would assume, unlike the couple in this episode, that prospective adoptive parents would attempt to learn at least a basic vocabulary. It's not something I would do, but I tip my hat to those who do.

 

This adoptive family had a strange dynamic - if they're only going to be shown in this episode, I don't understand why they'd portray them that way. If they are (or at least less than eager Mum is) in the next episode, maybe that will be explored a bit. It seems a bit too complex for this summer popcorn show.

 

Random comment - put me on the list as one of the ones who thought Chloe was talking to her lover and not to her sister.

Edited by clanstarling
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Pippin

Pippin

(edited)
The one that keeps nagging at me is that animals really don't want to fuck with us.  Animals can win a battle against a person relatively easily. But they're boned if they want to take on people. We're indiscriminate killing machines and are really good at it.

 

 

This.

 

As far as teeth and claws are concerned, we humans are not very well equipped.  That's why initially in a Jurrassic World-type scenario, we wouldn't do very well.  But we do have these big brains.  And these brains allow us to see the arrowhead in the rock and create the same.  Other animals can and do create tools, but so far, humans seem to be the only ones to have the capacity to visualize the knife from the rock or the spear from the stick.  That's what ultimately makes us dangerous and the most lethal predator on planet earth.

 

(I always think of the Alien series; the alien was a perfect killing machine but the frail humans had their wits and the technology arising from said wits to combat it with.) 

 

It's not our nicest attribute (and that's understating the case) but it's one of the reasons we've survived (so far, anyhow.)

Edited by Pippin
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slothgirl

slothgirl

Americans adopt children from China and Russia all the time

 

That's why I don't buy the dogs turning on humans in Slovenia.  Dogs will put up with anything.  Cats are a much more believable human predator, IMO.

I think people often adopt much younger children and infants whose language skills are minimal or non-existent anyway.

 

Cats won't put up with anything like Dogs, but they will take advantage of pretty much anything they can get. So they wouldn't be likely to revolt; they would just manipulate us inito doinng their bidding... oh wait...

The way I see it, if dogs suddenly become smarter, it seems like they'd be less interested in killing us than trying to find out our secrets like "Where does cheese come from?" and "Why does that chime go off when somebody is at the front door?"

"How can I make bacon without opposeble thumbs?"

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