S02.E09: Conflict

[butterly17]

I think Jaclyn is probably deeply sensitive and her over the top agressive behavior is to protect herself.  Being vulnerable is probably something that is very, very scary for her.

 

I can see why she was deeply hurt, because the minute she began to become vulnerable, he backed away.

[ElectricCityy]

This season is dragging and all these couples are terrible. Apparently there's still a whole month of this? These men are no Jason and Doug. Hopefully they'll have more likable people next season.

[LK615]

Amen to your entire post!  But truthfully her over the top extroversion looks a little pathological to me.  I can't help but think it comes from desperation.  It even reminds me a little of the manic phase of manic depression.  (Sorry for the armchair psychology.)  The more she pursues the more he pulls away and then the more she pursues to the point where she's effectively chased him away so bad he won't even contact her when she goes away.  Yikes.

No, it is definitely not manic lol. I think this is being read into a little too much. Jaclyn is just an extremely outgoing person. He asked for an extrovert because he thought he was also an extrovert and is only learning now that he really isn't. 

[Aethera]

Not one of these so-called experts picked up on what's happening with Ryan R and Jaclyn. It's obvious that she's an extrovert and he's an introvert. That means he's going to need some time alone periodically to recharge. That's what he was doing when she went to Key West. It wasn't personal. It's what an introvert needs, especially when spending a lot of time with a high-energy extrovert like Jaclyn. If they can both understand this and allow for it, they'll do fine.

 

And somebody should tell her to dial back the masculine aggressiveness when she's with her husband. She can be as aggressive as she wants at work, but her husband is not interested in being around another man. He wants to be with a woman. Act like it, Jaclyn! Being a female is a good thing when you're with your husband!

 

 

The first half of this is entirely on point for Jaclyn & Ryan R - introverts definitely need time to recharge.  She needs to understand that.  We also don't know if she called him a lot while she was away and was being ignored - it can be helpful in relationships between an introvert and an extrovert to come to an understanding about communicating when apart, or generally - how to indicate one needs space, how to check in without overwhelming the introvert - my boyfriend and I have done a decent job with that. Hopefully, J&R will figure it out.

 

The 2nd half - being aggressive is not the same as being a man.  Women can be aggressive without compromising their femininity or making themselves unattractive to their partners. I agree she is over-aggressive, and needs to find a middle ground between being all over him and ignoring him, but it has nothing to do with her gender.

[CoolJewelMoon]

I found it interesting that Ryan D had this big unexpected paradigm shift towards Jessica and marriage, but then we see they had a counseling appointment coming up!  It definitely seemed his attitude adjustment had something to do with it to me, and it will be interesting to see if he has really turned over a new leaf....  

 

And Lego's - really?!?  Davina even bought the ones more for a toddler, but maybe that was a subconscious move....

 

Also, in regards to Ryan and Jaclyn - you KNOW something is wrong if someone passes down an opportunity to go to Key West!  (LOVE Key West!!!)  Although I can see why he felt he needed some space.  I like Jaclyn too, but Jessica seems to be more his type - laid back and sensitive....

 

Speaking of that - maybe they should add a new element to the show and switch the two Ryan's around!  Wouldn't you love to see Jaclyn give it back to Ryan D?!?

[ZaldamoWilder]

Davina and Sean.  I know relationships are work and stuff but if you have to schedule fun, put yourselves out of misery.   Career-specific Leggos?  Girl, really?  Naked Leggos, that's a game he can get into. 

 

Ryan and Jaclyn.  For the right guy, I actually don't think she's a lot at all.  When he said she's very *in your face* that's the punkass way of saying I don't like, nor want to be directly confronted about my feelings because the truth is I'm dead inside.  You can tell from the not real teeth.  Her communication style might be sort of machine gunnish but she's extremely perceptive and I think she gets her assessments, including, if they're self critical, right 100% of the time.   He's not the guy for you Jax.  Don't let that affect your ego or confidence because he's not the guy for any strong woman, shame we didn't know that before you took the plunge, but now we do.  

 

Ryan and Jessica.  I think I was most interested in their path, but now I just don't care.   Call me gullible as hell because when he sat down at the table and offered the halfassology and admitted to some immaturity and needing to do some growth, I was proud of him.  That's a huge confession from a dude who's not a meathead   When she said divorce wasn't in her vocabulary, God help me I giggled.  I love the sentiment of that commitment, however, the reality is if your husband doesn't like, respect, love or want to even know you (and I don't believe that part's acting), expand your vocabulary, divorce should be one of your options.  What Jess needed to learn/do in that moment though was also halfassology to him and state her areas of improvement.  This is one of those times that inexperience? and/or youth? shows through.  You don't have to be married to know when to concede, drop and roll.  And since you (think) you're gonna be doing this for many years to come, you don't have to *win* every argument, it's not a contest.   But like ya'll have already stated above, they're actors so I'm not even really sure how many fucks I should be giving.   

 

Early on I was rooting for Jaclyn and Ryan.  Not anymore.   I'm hoping Jess and Ryan don't stay together because "sweet side" notwithstanding, the guy's borderline abusive.   With Sean and Davina, I totally understood what she was trying to say about perceiving his behavior as weak-man ish.  That 24/7 cycle of whiny me-me-me and my feelings shit is not sexy on a dude and it's hard to recover from.

Edited May 13, 2015 by ZaldamoWilder

[Primetimer]

The couples work on their issues in marital counseling this week; we're ranking them from littlest to biggest failure!

Read the story

[Snarklepuss]

No, it is definitely not manic lol. I think this is being read into a little too much. Jaclyn is just an extremely outgoing person. He asked for an extrovert because he thought he was also an extrovert and is only learning now that he really isn't. 

 

No I don't really think it's manic but it almost feels that way to me nonetheless.  I don't even think Jaclyn herself would be that outgoing if she were with a guy who was more outgoing himself.  They would balance each other out.  It looks to me like she's always trying to fill in the silence with Ryan as if she's trying to compensate for his lack of extroversion.  She wouldn't feel the need to do that if Ryan were more outgoing.  Ryan may actually be an extrovert but just not as much of one as Jaclyn is.  Or is being right now.  I think even the most extreme extrovert would think they were an introvert after several days of Jaclyn's behavior.  I kind of feel that Ryan's an introvert, but like I said last week, Jaclyn would make any extrovert look like an introvert!  I would have hoped the experts could have been able to tell if Ryan were really an introvert even if he thought otherwise.  I am usually very good at spotting them being one myself.  BTW, even extroverts need down time every now and then, just not as often as introverts do.  So her lack of needing that still seems like more than just extroversion to me.  Let's face it, the guy was completely and totally exhausted by her because she would not let up.  Even extroverts let up after a while.  But what do I know?  I just studied Myers-Briggs Type theory for 25 years (not claiming to be an expert but still).

Edited May 13, 2015 by Snarklepuss

[BunnySlippers]

I agree that last night's episode was underwhelming, despite the editing trying to make it look like all 3 couples are on the mend.

 

None of these couples are really complementary to each other, and it feels like they were matched out of desperation: because they had a hit show, and they needed to make a new season.

Davina needs someone who loves New York and especially Manhattan, loves the high-end lifestyle, worships the ground she walks on, and has nothing else to do than to constantly figure out what she's thinking and feeling - then talk about it for hours.

 

Sean, as I understand it from things I've read online, just wanted to be on T.V.

 

Jessica needs someone who handles her like she's precious cargo and never hurts her feelings. Maybe she would do better with a warm, considerate man, I don't know. To tell the truth, I find her a little boring, so she might do well with Ryan R who, I agree, has turned out to be a pretty boring guy himself.

 

Ryan D needs someone who doesn't take crap from him, but not by pouting and not saying anything until she can't take it anymore. He needs someone who can stand up for herself, tease him back, yell back at him, etc. etc. We heard how his worshiped grandfather had treated his grandmother. Did we hear how his grandmother reacted to that? When his grandfather said, "Shut up and do as I say," did she say something in the same vein to him and then they went back and forth without either of them getting hurt and bent out of shape? Maybe that's how that marriage was, and that's what Ryan D wanted.

 

Ryan R needs someone who will move into his mother's basement with him, or at least next door, stays quiet, and never wants sex unless he wants it.

 

Jaclyn needs someone who is just as boisterous as she is, laughs at her jokes, enjoys having fun with her, and can keep up with her libido.

Edited May 13, 2015 by BunnySlippers

[BunnySlippers]

Every one of the newlyweds is suspect to me now. Ryan R (Jaclyn's spouse) seemed sincere and regular when season 2 started, and he probably will get the hero's edit in the end. Several posters here commented that they saw early red flags in Ryan R though because he loved casino life. Tangentially, there was concern that gambling and drinking often (though not always) went hand in hand.

Well did you all check out the card table where Ryan and his buds were chillin while Jaclyn was in Florida? The beer was a-flowing (though the number of bottles was ridiculously inconsistent because of sloppy editing).

...

Dr C ..........you tried your best tonight; I didnt cringe at your counseling because you were specific, honest and practical in your guidance. Please lose the blazer with that ribbon piping though. Im sure its a designer jacket that cost a bit, but it looks doorman-y, or, maybe, a little circus ringmaster -y. :)........but good job, tonight (I know Ive been rough on the man).

 

I noticed all those beer bottles, too, and didn't think that was a good sign. I liked his friend, though, and his advice.

 

Dr. C's jacket - LOL, I totally agree with you. :D

 

I think what happened to turn Ryan R. off is what he said in his talking head - That until they had sex Jaclyn was holding back, but afterwards she suddenly became so into him that it overwhelmed him.  I could imagine that it must have felt a little creepy, desperate and unexpected.  Jaclyn is too much even when she's holding back but to suddenly act like she is THAT into him must have felt like too much all at once.   She was doing OK until then but way to scare a guy by suddenly letting the floodgates open and turning into a clinging vine!  The way she almost swallowed him whole jumping on him and grabbing him with her legs last week said it all!  And she probably ate him up in bed, too.  He already was worried last week about her voracious sexual appetite.   I think this does have something to do with an introvert versus extrovert thing, but I think it goes way beyond extroversion with Jaclyn.   There's like a creepy neediness she has been hiding but couldn't help but let out of the bottle after having sex with him.  It's no wonder Ryan was turned off!

 

Yes, I think Jaclyn's (supposedly) voracious sexual appetite might have scared him off. He seems to have a big problem with Jaclyn making him feel less masculine, so I wonder if that's one reason. Jaclyn wanting to have sex more than he does might make him feel like he's not man enough (at least for her). Just a thought.

 

 

Okay, yes. Jaclyn's boisterous, extroverted personality would wear on me after a while, but Ryan R is such a ... nothing. He has zero personality. He didn't seem bothered when Jaclyn was keeping him at a distance and didn't push her for sex or take any kind of positive action to try to bring them closer. He didn't respond any better after they had sex. He's not in any way affectionate, spontaneous or fun-loving. He barely smiles. His one tone of voice is monotone, if not outright dolorous. I thought he was at least loyal, stable, and dependable, but no. He cut and ran while Ryan Douche did not. For him to not so much as text Jaclyn while she was out of town was really low.

 

 

I agree. Ryan R seems like a nice guy, but he doesn't seem to have much of a personality, and I haven't seen much affection from him either. And now I've had another thought: maybe he wasn't too upset about Jaclyn not having sex with him in the beginning because sex is just not that important to him? He did say in one of his talking heads that he's always ready for sex, but apparently that was just talk.

 

And great point about Ryan R checking out while Ryan D was still sticking it out. I have less of a negative opinion of Ryan D for that. Also, not contacting Jaclyn at all while she was away was really cold and uncaring.

 

 

• Douchebag Ryan/Jessica - 'If I offended you, I'm sorry'  Really?  'IF'?!  That's like saying 'I said nothing wrong, its just that you are overly sensitive'  And she may be, but not in what we saw last week.  As far as of her list of words that hurt, selfish should not be there but 'stupid'?!  Hell yeah that should be there.  And her thinking that this is going to turn around is delusional.  Oh and her bold statement that 'Everyone who knows me knows that I wanted to get married and divorce is not in my vocabulary'....wow....a 30 year old woman who wants to be married...AND it not ending in divorce?!  Woooaaaahhhh stop the presses!!!  Jeez, that statement is so stupid....oh ;)

 

 

I noticed that, too. Saying "If I offended you, I'm sorry," means "I don't think I did anything wrong; it was you who took it personally, but whatever, just to placate you, I'll say I'm sorry."

 

 

Jaclyn and Ryan R are making me sad.  That was a total douche move he pulled on her, both pulling away and then not even texting her while she was gone.  This is a woman who has been nothing but kind to him, keeping her negative initial feelings to herself (unlike Jamie who laid on the floor and had a temper tantrum in her wedding dress), reached out to his family at Christmas and really tried to push through the issues she knew that she had, taking those things on herself, rather than putting it all on him.  If he wants to have a traditional male role in the relationship, he needs to talk to her about it and negotiate it, not suddenly go cold.  It has to be incredibly hurtful to open up sexually after 2 years of celibacy and then have the guy just go "uh, on second thought, no thanks".  I really really hope they're being edited for drama and that they are working it all out.

 

Jessica and Ryan D - one therapy session isn't going to scratch the surface of that mess.

 

I agree about Jaclyn. I don't blame her for not being immediately attracted to Ryan. I wouldn't have been either. But she was still civil to him and tried her best. Though saying things like "bro" and "dude" and giving him that swimming lesson didn't help, so it's not like she's perfect. But from what I've seen (from what we've been shown) it's been mainly her who's been trying to make this thing work. She's had a lot of talking heads in which she talked about her faults and mistakes and said that she was going to try to do better. I haven't seen much of that from Ryan.

 

Yes, it must be incredibly hurtful to have opened up after her dry spell and get this in turn. I'm glad she pulled back. It seems like that's what Ryan needed, too: he needed to see that if he keeps doing what he'd been doing, he could lose this woman who might not be the ideal match for him, but she would certainly be a loving, compassionate, and - at least sometimes - fun wife.

 

Jessica and Ryan D - I can't see them actually make it, but we'll see.

Edited May 13, 2015 by BunnySlippers

[JoannKB]

And Lego's - really?!?  Davina even bought the ones more for a toddler, but maybe that was a subconscious move....

 

It made me laugh out loud when I saw that Davina bought the Duplo (toddler) Legos to represent Sean and his life, and bought regular Legos to represent herself. She obviously feels like she needs to treat him like a child, probably because he acts like a child.

 

Also - what was up with Jersey being represented by a farm? Does he live on a farm? I'm not on the East Coast, so I really don't understand the great divide they seem to have about Manhattan versus Jersey. He lives an hour away in the suburbs, right? Is it really that much of a culture shock to go from one to the other?

[JAndy]

It made me laugh out loud when I saw that Davina bought the Duplo (toddler) Legos to represent Sean and his life, and bought regular Legos to represent herself. She obviously feels like she needs to treat him like a child, probably because he acts like a child.

Also - what was up with Jersey being represented by a farm? Does he live on a farm? I'm not on the East Coast, so I really don't understand the great divide they seem to have about Manhattan versus Jersey. He lives an hour away in the suburbs, right? Is it really that much of a culture shock to go from one to the other?

No idea why they represent jersey as a farm. When I think of NJ, a farm doesn't come to mind. I don't know the area where he is from too well, but didn't he say he's from Jackson, NJ - I think Six Flags Great Adventure is right around there.

[bichonblitz]

 

Jaclyn needs someone who is just as boisterous as she is, laughs at her jokes, enjoys having fun with her, and can keep up with her libido.

Funny she has such a huge libido but claims she hasn't been in a relationship for 7 yrs.  I don't buy her story. And who goes to Key West on a business trip? I live in Florida, trust me, Key West is not a mecca for business conventions.  More like party time with the girlfriends maybe. 

[Snarklepuss]

Also - what was up with Jersey being represented by a farm? Does he live on a farm? I'm not on the East Coast, so I really don't understand the great divide they seem to have about Manhattan versus Jersey. He lives an hour away in the suburbs, right? Is it really that much of a culture shock to go from one to the other?

 

Actually, depending on where you are in Jersey, yes it can be a huge culture shock.  I think where he is it would be enough of a shock although I doubt that he lives in a farm area like the farmland further out in the state.  Jersey does have a lot of open space as in the Pine Barrens and some farmland although it is very populated in many areas.  Food and agriculture are it's 3rd biggest industry.  As you get further away from NYC the culture changes and it gets more suburban and even rural.  When I moved 40 miles away to CT from NY it was a huge culture shock.  It was like going to a different country.  When I visited South Jersey as a kid I thought I was in the sticks and the people were like country folk.  Of course it's not quite that much of a difference now, but still.  NYC is like no other place, really.  

Edited May 13, 2015 by Snarklepuss

[bichonblitz]

No idea why they represent jersey as a farm. When I think of NJ, a farm doesn't come to mind. I don't know the area where he is from too well, but didn't he say he's from Jackson, NJ - I think Six Flags Great Adventure is right around there.

I have a friend from NJ who also watches this show. She said Jackson is in the middle of nowhere, and there is alot of farmland in NJ still. Don't you know the best tomato's come from there. Lol, but this is true. Nobody wants to live in Jackson. You can buy a nice piece of real estate there because of the location. 

Edited May 13, 2015 by bichonblitz

[Snarklepuss]

Funny she has such a huge libido but claims she hasn't been in a relationship for 7 yrs.  I don't buy her story. And who goes to Key West on a business trip? I live in Florida, trust me, Key West is not a mecca for business conventions.  More like party time with the girlfriends maybe. 

 

Yeah, but she works for a vodka company and Key West = Party/drinking culture from what I hear.

I have a friend from NJ who also watches this show. She said Jackson is in the middle of nowhere, and there is alot of farmland in NJ still. Don't you know the best tomato's come from there. Lol, but this is true. Nobody wants to live in Jackson. You can buy a nice piece of real estate there because of the location. 

 

Yes, and of course there's the Jersey expression "Jersey Fresh" referring to its produce, especially tomatoes.  That's interesting that nobody wants to live in Jackson. 

[BunnySlippers]

It made me laugh out loud when I saw that Davina bought the Duplo (toddler) Legos to represent Sean and his life, and bought regular Legos to represent herself. She obviously feels like she needs to treat him like a child, probably because he acts like a child.

 

Also - what was up with Jersey being represented by a farm? Does he live on a farm? I'm not on the East Coast, so I really don't understand the great divide they seem to have about Manhattan versus Jersey. He lives an hour away in the suburbs, right? Is it really that much of a culture shock to go from one to the other?

 

Good point about toddler Legos for him and regular Legos for her. Though, it's possible that the store didn't have regular Legos with which you could make a farm. Still, that whole thing felt like a put-down to me (farm Legos for you, city Legos for me). At the same time, I can imagine that she didn't intend it that way. Like somebody else said, she might have done that whole thing to show what a fun person she was.

 

Funny she has such a huge libido but claims she hasn't been in a relationship for 7 yrs.  I don't buy her story.

 

I think they said she'd been single for 7 years and hadn't had sex for 2 years before her marriage. (Which sounds like she had a one night stand or a really short relationship 2 years ago.) Yeah, I'm not sure what to think of this "through the roof libido" thing. Maybe it's just huge compared to Ryan. I also think that Jaclyn has been starved for love and affection and she's trying to make up for lost time now.

 

[MV713]

Jackson NJ is also a prestigious area of Central NJ. I live about 30 minutes from there.  There are "farmish" sections and very large megamansion developments.  However, it is very different from NYC so I can see the contrast.

[biakbiak]

I found this episode boring, so much so that the only thing I was wondering was why on earth Sean and Davina were using nails to hang pictures in an apartment that they are only going to live in for a month! Use those hooks that don't leave a mark.

[MsPH]

Ryan R was annoying me a bit in this episode, but I'm sure he'll snap out of it now that Jaclyn's taken a step back. I don't think it was the sex that turned him off, he just got overwhelmed by her suddenly being all over him like a dog in heat both in private and in public and talking about babies and whatnot. He still hadn't even fully grasped being out of the friend zone and she was all about happily ever after. Can't blame him for freaking out. It's not like he was ever the one actively pursuing her. He's no Doug. Even on the honeymoon he was questioning her behaviour and their compatibility a lot, so I didn't see it as him doing a 180. He's been a cautious slow mover the entire time as opposed to her going from cold to burning hot in mere days. But she is a good person and a good communicator, so I have faith in them figuring things out and finding the right balance. It seemed like they'd already talked things through before their appointment with Dr. C and that's a great sign. At least these two actually like and care about each other, which is way more than you can say about the other two couples who barely torelate each other's company.

 

I don't buy Ryan D's turnaround at all. Seemed like he just didn't want Jess to badmouth him too much to Dr. C, so he decided to make peace beforehand. And that apology wasn't an actual apology like pointed out by many before me. If one talk was all it took to cure an asshole, then the world would be a much better place!

 

It's great that Jessica is so loyal, but there's no point trying to force a marriage to work when you didn't even pick the guy yourself! Love is not gonna happen without respect and these two don't really respect each other. Gonna be a miserable life if they decide to stay together.

 

Davina is so weird! She goes into a mood at the drop of a hat. I was totally confused by that conversation they had over takeout. He'd barely finished his thoughts when she snapped at him for not asking her the same question in return. Yeah, he is a bit self-involved, but I don't think he means harm, so there's no reason for her to take everything so personally. She acts like he's throwing around insults or something. Talk about playing the victim! It was also pretty insulting to call him weak just because he's having a tough time dealing with a move and her needy ass. I do agree that Dr. C seems way too chummy with Sean. It's not really fair to Davina.

 

Anyway, both Sean and Davina are exhausting to listen to and can't even fake having fun, even though they sure like talking about it. Depressing pair.

[Wings]

I found this episode boring, so much so that the only thing I was wondering was why on earth Sean and Davina were using nails to hang pictures in an apartment that they are only going to live in for a month! Use those hooks that don't leave a mark.

 

 

Holes are easily patched with a little spackle and touch up paint.  I have done this hundreds of times in my own house when I change the decor, which is more often than many!  I move art work around all the time. 

[biakbiak]

Holes are easily patched with a little spackle and touch up paint.  I have done this hundreds of times in my own house when I change the decor, which is more often than many!  I move art work around all the time. 

 

Well of course one can fix holes, just seems pretty stupid when they are going to live in this apartment only for a month and with them there isn't even the notion that they would live in the apartment longer than that even if they stay together because the reason they are living there is because they are waiting for Davina's apartment to be renovated, when they could use something that was easily removable and doesn't take the time and expense of spackle and paint.

 

Though since production probably paid for the security deposit they will most likely just leave the holes and not worry about losing the deposit. While my post was a joke, the episode was boring enough it is the only thing that stood out for me.

Edited May 13, 2015 by biakbiak

[MelineB13]

You know, for a guy who has done nothing but complain about how much he misses his mom and how he needs to be there for his niece, Ryan R having friends over to drink and play poker the first chance he got was very telling to me.  He should have been on the road home the minute he dropped Jaclyn off at the airport if all his bluster about homesickness was true.  

[qtpye]

Davina........has her issues, but biggest one is Sean. I think she comes across badly because she's feeling duped and used, and she cannot hide her genuine disappointment.

 

    

I didn't like how Dr. Cilona played that tape with Davina and kind of blamed her for Sean's behavior. I think that Sean isn't authentic and that Davina is having trouble articulating what is wrong and what she is feeling. Dr. C seems to like Sean a lot and he's been saying things about Davina on that baby board that seem to make it seem like he's picked a side. Not a fan of Davina's, but this doesn't seem fair.

 

 

Davina's issues could fill a list that could stretch from Manhattan to Jackson, New Jersey.  However, Sean had no emotional investment or in this marriage whatsoever and Davina can sense that.

 

It seems to me she was about to out Sean's phoniness to the camera when Dr. C gas lighted her with the video.  "No, Davina,...it is you that is wrong and we have the video to prove it." The experts are totally in love with Sean and will never admit that this guy manipulated them to be on t.v. and has no real interest in being in a relationship.

 

If you guys ever wonder about the quality of the so called professionals in charge of the matchmaking...head on over to the experts thread in this forum.  You have not lived until you have seen Dr. C's male modeling portfolio.

[Liberty]

I didn't like how Dr. Cilona played that tape with Davina

 

After the editing It seemed like he had that set up, just waiting for D to fall into his trap.  Talk about passive aggressive!

 

He's a real prince.

Edited May 13, 2015 by Liberty

[biakbiak]

I don't like Dr. C. but it wouldn't surprise me if they showed interview clips to everyone but that Davina was the only one who had a reaction that Dr. C. could pretend was a breakthrough.

[Snarklepuss]

Well of course one can fix holes, just seems pretty stupid when they are going to live in this apartment only for a month and with them there isn't even the notion that they would live in the apartment longer than that even if they stay together because the reason they are living there is because they are waiting for Davina's apartment to be renovated, when they could use something that was easily removable and doesn't take the time and expense of spackle and paint.

 

Though since production probably paid for the security deposit they will most likely just leave the holes and not worry about losing the deposit. While my post was a joke, the episode was boring enough it is the only thing that stood out for me.

 

I agree, but judging from the way Sean was putting that nail in the wall they couldn't even handle that much less know about the easily removable stuff (Command).  I was cringing when he was doing it.  It looked like the nail was loose inside the wall.  He gingerly perched the picture on top of it like he knew it was precarious.  He probably knows nothing about hanging a picture.  I think all of that was producer driven.  I don't even comment on Sean and Davina anymore because it's like they're just playing house for TV and I don't buy any of it anymore.

[zxy556575]

Jaclyn is in sales for a vodka company, so some sort of alcohol-themed event in Key West didn't strike me as unlikely. Or that the company might choose to have a sales retreat there. ;)

[Janet Snakehole]

I'm sorry, and I don't mean to make fun of the picture hanging convo, but I hope the producers of this show read this forum so they can see how boring these couples are getting. To the point that we are discussing picture hanging!

[zxy556575]

Spoiler alert: Dr. C and Sean get married at the end of the series?

Yes! On the beach in matching piped jackets.

[moonxyz]

******Since day 1 , I had the feeling that editing was painting  Basement Ryan and Jaclyn as the « golden »couple. But now  that the current narrative seems to  want to expose drama for all the couple, the once hidden issues are coming out. While I have problems with both of them, but Basement Ryan bothers me the most. Here is list of shitty/suspicious things her has done (or not done) that bother me:

 

-Episode 1 he says he meets women at casinos. Red Flag 1.
-His unwillingness to compromise for the holiday celebrations
-Hiding behind his niece and mom to not get emotionally involved. Even if his niece grows up, who will take care of mom? Ryan doesn’t strike me as the type that would put her in a nursing home
-Biggest asshole move is pulling away once she had sex with him. 
-He feels homesick, but when Jaclyn goes on her business trip, he doesn’t go back home. No, instead he drinks with his friends and gambles

 

I don’t buy his apology and I’m starting to question his motives and/or common sense. Did he really think the “experts” would find a woman willing to live in mom’s basement?

 

 

*** Jaclyn has been fake to me from day one. I see Ryan’s POV on this one: it’s very unrealistic to go from not being attracted at all to a guy to wanting to fuck his brains out several times a day. Either she overdid not liking him or is overdoing being into him.

 

 

**** Jessica and $ 100 Ryan: there’s something very fishy about $100 Ryan’s drastic mood change. I suspect that someone from production /or one of the experts had a talk with him off camera or the whole bow up was fake .

Also, I'm convinced that Jessica can’t actually cook at all. So full of sh*t. I know he’s an asshole, but can she at least cook for herself?

 

 

****Davina pulls the most obnoxious gas faces ever. She looks so stupid when she is emotional or whining. Sean is just happy to be on TV.

Am I the only who thinks Dr Joseph has a crush on Sean? I don’t like Davina but I didn’t like when he pulled out her audition video like that yet didn’t do the same for Sean to illustrate his initial enthusiasm vs what he current detachment.

[Janet Snakehole]

Yes! On the beach in matching piped jackets.

And Dr. Pepper saying what a sexy couple they make

[Snarklepuss]

I think Ryan R. is one of those guys that to his credit actually doesn't want to lead a woman on.  He was OK with having sex with Jaclyn thinking she was on the same page with him in going with the flow in the relationship but as soon as he saw how into him she was afterwards, he felt like he might be taking advantage of her.  He clearly feels her feelings are more advanced than his and her talking already about babies, etc., is a prime example of that.  So I think that's why he's put on the brakes.  He doesn't want to lead her on into thinking he's 100% invested in a lifetime commitment to her just yet if he's not.  After all, in spite of the fact that they're married, he's trying to take it one step at a time.  I think his instincts are actually good.  I don't think he should have to be 100% sure of a lifetime commitment to Jaclyn just yet.  I don't think any of them should be that sure so soon in.  Just because they're married doesn't mean that should happen overnight, IMO.  I'd be more worried that they were headed for disaster if they were that sure so soon in.

[Jellybeans]

None of the couples are ummm... I don't know the term... "cuddly/intimate" You don't see any of them snuggled together to talk. We saw that in the first season.

[JapMo]

 

Yes, it bothered me when she said that she doesn't want him to use that word because she's not selfish. Hate to tell you Jessica, but everyone acts selfishly at some point. 

I just don't know about Sean and Davina. There's something a little off about both of them. Davina's depiction of their relationship as her constantly having to be supportive of Sean because he's having difficulty adjusting to 'the experiment' does not compute from the 'Moving In" episode when Sean was clearly overwhelmed, and her response was a long list of, "I need you to, I need you to, I need you to...." She's exhausting. And I feel like everything she does is so over thought for how it will appear to others (not just for the cameras, but I think even in her normal life she thinks very, very hard about how she is perceived by other people.) For example the Legos; I think she bought them not because she thought they would be fun, but because she thought people watching would think how cute and fun she is to buy them. 

 

ETA: Also meant to comment on Ryan R. He's a nice guy, but I just find him so dull. I really think he's the kind of guy who would be content living in his mother's basement all his life so he didn't ever have to leave his comfort zone.

I've been saying that since the start about Ryan R. I can't imagine a sophisticated woman like Jessica finding ANYTHING interesting about him.

 

[I-Kare]

I totally didn't like the thing where Jessica wrote down "off limits" words for RyanD. This couple has a toxic relationship already and have very little trust in each other and she just handed him a list of trigger words. What do you want to bet he uses at least one of them during their next heated argument (which was probably in the car ride home).

[I-Kare]

I noticed "c***" was on the list. I wonder if he's used that word while arguing with her.

I think she said at some point that he hadn't used all of the, it was just a preemptive list. I know that word would be a deal breaker for me. 

[BunnySlippers]

I think Ryan R. is one of those guys that to his credit actually doesn't want to lead a woman on.  He was OK with having sex with Jaclyn thinking she was on the same page with him in going with the flow in the relationship but as soon as he saw how into him she was afterwards, he felt like he might be taking advantage of her.  He clearly feels her feelings are more advanced than his and her talking already about babies, etc., is a prime example of that.  So I think that's why he's put on the brakes.  He doesn't want to lead her on into thinking he's 100% invested in a lifetime commitment to her just yet if he's not.  After all, in spite of the fact that they're married, he's trying to take it one step at a time.  I think his instincts are actually good.  I don't think he should have to be 100% sure of a lifetime commitment to Jaclyn just yet.  I don't think any of them should be that sure so soon in.  Just because they're married doesn't mean that should happen overnight, IMO.  I'd be more worried that they were headed for disaster if they were that sure so soon in.

 

This would be fine if it was a dating show. But to go into a marriage, even a marriage like this, with these kinds of reservations, would mean that he didn't really want to give it his all. In that case, he shouldn't have gone on this show.

 

At the same time, I agree that they should just take it one step at a time and not talk about very long term commitment just yet. One problem with this show, however, is that 6 weeks is such a short amount of time, and after 6 weeks they have to make up their minds if they want to stay married or not. So, in that sense, they don't really have all the time in the world to figure this out. Not that they can't divorce after the 6 weeks mark, but they do have to say in front of the other person if they want to stay together or not.

 

I do agree that it's too early to talk about babies. But I have the vague impression that it wasn't Jaclyn who brought that subject up. I think it was someone else, wasn't it? At some party or family meeting or something? I can't remember.

[JapMo]

 

I agree.  I felt like this episode was helping to pad the series out or to make how things really turn out look more "dramatic" at the end.   Like they give us stupid misleading stuff and skip over the real stuff so when they finally show us what happens we're surprised.  Dumb show.

 

 

I thought she said she didn't think she was better than other people, as if she was implying that Ryan thinks he's better than other people.  But again, this is coming from her inferiority complex and perhaps a genuine reaction to Ryan's superiority complex, especially to her.

 

 

I think what happened to turn Ryan R. off is what he said in his talking head - That until they had sex Jaclyn was holding back, but afterwards she suddenly became so into him that it overwhelmed him.  I could imagine that it must have felt a little creepy, desperate and unexpected.  Jaclyn is too much even when she's holding back but to suddenly act like she is THAT into him must have felt like too much all at once.   She was doing OK until then but way to scare a guy by suddenly letting the floodgates open and turning into a clinging vine!  The way she almost swallowed him whole jumping on him and grabbing him with her legs last week said it all!  And she probably ate him up in bed, too.  He already was worried last week about her voracious sexual appetite.   I think this does have something to do with an introvert versus extrovert thing, but I think it goes way beyond extroversion with Jaclyn.   There's like a creepy neediness she has been hiding but couldn't help but let out of the bottle after having sex with him.  It's no wonder Ryan was turned off!

 

 

Yeah but it bothers us more because we're New Yorkers, lol.

I've said all along I felt Jaclyn was faking her attraction to him, and watching last night I still feel that way. She said to Ryan "How can I forgive you?" For what? For pulling back a little? Or for not wanting to be a phony like she has been? Ryan seems afraid to actually say why he now has reservations, so instead he gives lame excuses like he's homesick. Throughout the episode, he apologized over and over about his behavior, but kind of just threw his hands up as to the reason why. I think he's afraid to admit that after getting to know her better, he doesn't think Jaclyn is really the right person for him. He has nothing but good things to say about her, but he doesn't even try to contact her when she's in Florida for 3 days? This, to me, is very telling. As for Jaclyn, my feeling is she does not want to "fail", as in divorce, so she's throwing herself in to this with everything she has. I know posters will not agree with me, but of all of the couples, JacRy to me are the least compatible. You have The Bickersons (JesRy) who argue a lot but still seem to have some chemistry going on. Then The Ear-Benders (S&D) who can't stop talking ABOUT their relationship to actually be IN their relationship, but who actually seem like they could be compatible. But I don't see any ray of light in JacRy's relationship. No, they don't argue much and no, they don't talk it to death much. But they also don't seem to fit with the other person. Fundamentally, they just don't fit together. IMO of course.

[JapMo]

 

They also say "growing" a lot which I find hysterical. "We're not growing" or "My goal is for us to continue growing in this relationship." They definitely have their favorite phrases. 

 

 

I agree with this. I didn't watch last season so I have no frame of reference but I feel like we're being TOLD everything and SHOWN very little. Like there was no discernable change to me in Ryan R.'s behavior so the change in his relationship with Jaclyn and her feeling like he was checking-out didn't carry much weight with me. Davina complains that Sean is not "with her" but we haven't seen that. We never saw her watiing around for him when she expected him or something similar. I find Jessica and Ryan terribly annoying but at least I understand their relationship more because we're actually seeing the things they talk about. It's just been strange for me.

I couldn't agree more with your comments. I, too, was scratching my head about the overemphasis that Ryan R is pulling back soooooo much. I can understand why, but they really haven't actually shown it other than he bored all Jaclyn's relatives last week with his non-stop account of how homesick he is. But he's a boring guy, so what's new? And yeah, Jaclyn has stopped saying she isn't attracted to him and pretended for the cameras to really have the hots for him, but I'm not REALLY seeing it. And Davina and Sean seem like they are always together. Last week they ran in the park and went shopping. Now for some reason she pouts that he's not with her? Whatever.  

[biakbiak]

And Davina and Sean seem like they are always together. Last week they ran in the park and went shopping. Now for some reason she pouts that he's not with her?

 

It has been stated on both episodes that he stays in NJ when he is working and only comes into the city on his day's off so basically we are seeing the only times during the week they are together.

 

I mean I don't blame him for staying in NJ given his schedule and the commute but they clearly don't spend that much time together.

 

 

 

This would be fine if it was a dating show. But to go into a marriage, even a marriage like this, with these kinds of reservations, would mean that he didn't really want to give it his all. In that case, he shouldn't have gone on this show.

 

But it's entirely possible that he didn't know that he would have these reservations when he signed up for the show. It has also been mentioned that by Jaclyn and Ryan both made location a deal breaker but were still matched up and unlike Davina and Sean came up with somewhat of a compromise, so when he entered into the "experiment" he wasn't thinking about being homesick in addition to being married to a stranger.

Edited May 13, 2015 by biakbiak

[KYBlonde]

 

Oh and her bold statement that 'Everyone who knows me knows that I wanted to get married and divorce is not in my vocabulary'....wow....a 30 year old woman who wants to be married...AND it not ending in divorce?!

 

 And what in the actual HELL is she doing on a show called Married at FIRST SIGHT??? You picked the wrong show, Honey, to fame whore on if divorce is truly not in your vocabulary!!

 

ETA:  Maybe because I grew up the youngest in a very large, loud family, I can understand introverts.  I remember as a child leaving my house just to get some silence to think. We had an apple orchard and that was my refuge.  But one thing I have encountered with extroverts?  They seem to consider introverts as shy and backwards - like we have a personality disorder.  Being observant and listening rather than controlling conversations is not a bad thing.  My grandma loved the expression that "it's better to be thought a fool than to open your mouth and erase all doubt."  My Granny rocked.

Edited May 13, 2015 by KYBlonde

[BunnySlippers]

 

But it's entirely possible that he didn't know that he would have these reservations when he signed up for the show. It has also been mentioned that by Jaclyn and Ryan both made location a deal breaker but were still matched up and unlike Davina and Sean came up with somewhat of a compromise, so when he entered into the "experiment" he wasn't thinking about being homesick in addition to being married to a stranger.

 

True, but at the same time, the location issue was also there before they had sex. So if that was such a dealbreaker for him, maybe he shouldn't have led Jaclyn on by having sex with her and making her think that he was serious about this marriage. I think it's more likely that he started to get annoyed by her personality and by her pronounced need for physical intimacy.

 

And, like others have mentioned, interestingly, when Jaclyn was away, instead of visiting his mother and niece, he invited his friends over to drink and play cards. (Of course, we don't know if he did or did not visit his family during this time, but if he did, it wasn't shown.)

 

Things are definitely not black and white, and nobody is perfect, that's for sure. :)

[Phoenix]

The picture hanging/nail pounding segment with Sean/Davina was disturbing. Sean actually seemed nervous as he was preparing to pound a simple nail in the wall.  Then after accomplishing it, he wanted Davina to praise him for it.  Neither of them thought of locating a stud in the wall, so he put the nail in drywall...good thing they weren't hanging a heavy mirror or picture instead.  This couple is a total fail.  She is incredibly high maintenance with all her emotional neediness, as well as her need to be regarded as a precious commodity and he seems too into himself to care for another person. 

[butterbean1]

****Davina pulls the most obnoxious gas faces ever. She looks so stupid when she is emotional or whining. Sean is just happy to be on TV.

Am I the only who thinks Dr Joseph has a crush on Sean? I don’t like Davina but I didn’t like when he pulled out her audition video like that yet didn’t do the same for Sean to illustrate his initial enthusiasm vs what he current detachment.

Is Dr. C gay?  Because that is the vibe I get from him.  I also got the same vibe from Sean from like the 2nd episode and still think he is at least bi.

[B3cky50]

••Since I seen Jessica on that show, I can't take her seriously. Really- what are the odds that BOTH Ryan and Jess were both on shows?

Wait, I'm lost, what is this in reference to? She was on another reality show?

Jessica drives me crazy with her constant sourpuss bitch face. She nags 24/7 and her Ryan is a ticking time bomb. I think they are both too young and self centered to be on this show. No offense to you youngins, but I wish they would only pick contestants 30 or older. I don't know many 20 somethings who know what they want or even who they are yet.... they've barely been on their own yet.

(I know, flame away.)

The editing also pissed me off. Last week Jaclyn and Ryan were FINE. This came out of nowhere. Where were the cameras??

Sean and Davina. Over it.

[Snarklepuss]

I totally didn't like the thing where Jessica wrote down "off limits" words for RyanD. This couple has a toxic relationship already and have very little trust in each other and she just handed him a list of trigger words. What do you want to bet he uses at least one of them during their next heated argument (which was probably in the car ride home).

 

I don't like it either because I think it's unrealistic and restrictive.  OK I agree with the "c" word but stuff like selfish is just too much to expect, IMO.  It's bound to come out sooner or later.  It's like these people who write their own marriage vows and vow to never get mad at each other and to always respect each other.  Yikes, that's a set up for a total fail.  Be careful what you promise in a relationship.

 

I'm beginning to see that the difference between Jessica and Ryan D. is that he comes from one of those "let it all hang out" families where everyone is arguing and talking over everyone else with voices raised sort of like Woody Allen's childhood scenes in "Annie Hall".  Jessica does not come from that kind of family.  It sort of reminds me of Mr. Snarklepuss and I again.  When he first met my crazy Italian family he was mortified thinking we all hated each other because we would fight, get it out and then 2 minutes later it was all forgotten like it never happened.  He couldn't wrap his mind around it because in his family words could not be taken back and if someone argued and used harsh descriptions, a grudge would be held for days if not forever.  It took us a few years to work out that difference.  It really worked out only after Mr. Snarklepuss got a job working with another family that was a lot like mine.  I actually don't think Jessica and Ryan's problem is necessarily one they can't work out, but I don't think forbidding certain words is a good way to go about doing that.  I think she actually has to become a little more thick skinned about stuff like that.  For sure, he has to learn not to let it all hang out quite so much too.  I had to learn a different approach myself so I understand his issue.

[Snarklepuss]

The picture hanging/nail pounding segment with Sean/Davina was disturbing. Sean actually seemed nervous as he was preparing to pound a simple nail in the wall.  Then after accomplishing it, he wanted Davina to praise him for it.  Neither of them thought of locating a stud in the wall, so he put the nail in drywall...good thing they weren't hanging a heavy mirror or picture instead.  This couple is a total fail.  She is incredibly high maintenance with all her emotional neediness, as well as her need to be regarded as a precious commodity and he seems too into himself to care for another person. 

 

I think that scene was a phony baloney set-up anyway, but I watched it again tonight and actually that wasn't a nail at all but a screw.  So much for his knowledge of picture hanging.  Yikes.

[princelina]

I'm beginning to see that the difference between Jessica and Ryan D. is that he comes from one of those "let it all hang out" families where everyone is arguing and talking over everyone else with voices raised sort of like Woody Allen's childhood scenes in "Annie Hall".  Jessica does not come from that kind of family.  It sort of reminds me of Mr. Snarklepuss and I again.

 

Same here - I come from a family where we could have a screaming fight which ended in slammed doors, followed by everyone sitting around the dinner table 15 minutes later (and possibly making fun of each other for what was yelled during the fight!)  Mr. P comes from an easily offended family who holds grudges, "teaches lessons" and doesn't talk for ages.  So I had to learn to speak softly and not yell; he had to learn that fights don't have to last for weeks.  The thing I found most interesting with Ryan D and Jessica was when he called her out for putting "selfish" on her list - she spoke up immediately about why she didn't want to hear it, and he said okay.  Whether he will stand by that remains to be seen, but it was the first time she talked back rather than stewing silently, and the result was the respect she claims to want.

 

For Jaclyn and Basement Ryan (love that!!)  I do think that she is more extrovert and he is introvert; also think that she is possibly over-the-top seeming due to being on TV, and also that her "raging libido" might be more that she's just more aggressive than he is.  I can see where she is just "too much" - and as far as the "let him be the man" argument goes, I would say from what we have seen, the grocery store was the example - let him pay for the damn groceries and say thank you.  If you are married it will all come out even eventually.  (Back in my dating days, I always offered to pay or contribute to the first date, but if the guy insisted on paying I said "Thank you", and then took my turn if there was a second date.  It is a stupid fight to have if you like someone and plan to spend more time with them, and I don't mind being called sexist for thinking that it's better to let the guy win the initial argument.)  The bit about blowing her off when she left on her trip and having friends over rather than running home to Mom's basement are, for the time being, things I can blame on editing until I see how this all plays out.

 

Sean and Davina - so weird.  I agree with the poster from last week's episode who said that they are like aliens trying to act like people.  And how do people have fun?  They do Legos.  Just ask my nephew - he's 9.  

 

I have seen lots of married couples over the years - hey Davina!  I have seen lots of chicks with super-devoted husbands who put up with their nonsense and kiss their asses like crazy!  and they are not nearly as attractive as you!  It can be done - keep looking!

 

I also am pretty good at "snap judgments" of people, and the person I liked the least on episode 1 was Sean.  And I still think I'm right.  That being said, my gaydar is terrible, and while I still wondered about Sean, I didn't get a ping from his boyfriend, "Dr. Joseph".  But I did wonder if "Dr. Joseph" had been bullied in his youth :)  Hahahaha!

[Setlist]

Yes! On the beach in matching piped jackets.

I love the both of you, for bringing this amazing mental image into my brain.

I have to say, this episode was a bit of a snooze. I already can't wait for a reunion. It's bound to be the most action packed episode of the season.