S14.E05: It's Like A Booze Cruise With Knowledge

[Tara Ariano]

The celebrities create and host a boat tour of New York City, but one team makes waves with a big risk. Then, they transform an empty platform stage into a flashy environment with a three-dimensional theme.

[ryebread]

Brandi and booze? On a boat? This oughtta be a good one. 

 

Pity she used her fake anxiety attack card a couple episodes ago.  If she disappears this week she can feign seasickness.

 

 

[ginger90]

A few years ago there was supposed to be a cruise with Kate as the draw. And then............. http://www.royalcaribbeanblog.com/2012/05/10/kate-gosselin-royal-caribbean-cruise-cancelled

[ryebread]

A few years ago there was supposed to be a cruise with Kate as the draw. And then............. http://www.royalcaribbeanblog.com/2012/05/10/kate-gosselin-royal-caribbean-cruise-cancelled

 

What in the heck were they thinking?  Why would that cruise be a big draw for anyone other than Kate and her 8?

[chlban]

Brandi and booze? On a boat? This oughtta be a good one. 

 

Pity she used her fake anxiety attack card a couple episodes ago.  If she disappears this week she can feign seasickness.

Well if Brandi's there you know there's going to be booze. The boat is a new twist though. I suppose if she fell overboard we would have already heard about it, so no point in hoping......... 

[njbchlover]

Geraldo was embarassing and tasteless during that cruise....

as was Kenya, with her floor dancing (and "singing" sans autotune)....

[Crucial]

From Geraldo's speech to his disgusting chat with the Hooter's girls he should be gone.  What a pervert.  Sig wasn't good but Geraldo did his team in. Geraldo isn't ever going because if he wasn't fired for that effort he never will be. 

 

Maybe if the idiots on that team would all go against Geraldo, he could be gone by now.  But they back down like scared little kids.

Edited January 27, 2015 by Crucial

[cooksdelight]

Why didn't Kate, Viveca or Sig say something about Geraldo ruining things for the cruise? Why?

[Ffiferoo]

I wish Sig had actually stood up for himself and pointed out the fact that Geraldo caused just as big of a strike against their team as the Hooter's decision did, and all on his own to boot with his tasteless comments.  Everyone seems scared of him, it's ridiculous.

[Bronzedog]

The Hooters girls was a horrible idea but I'm confused. The Coast Guard is a federal agency under the U.S. Department. Of Transportation, is it not? How do you make contributions to a federal agency?

Edited January 27, 2015 by Bronzedog

[schmickschmack]

The Hooters girls was a horrible idea but I'm confused. The Coast Guard is a federal agency under the U.S. Department. Of Transportation, is it not? How do you make contributions to a federal agency?

THISSS!!!!  Their website extension is .mil! How can they take charity donations?!

[Thumper82003]

From Geraldo's speech to his disgusting chat with the Hooter's girls he should be gone. What a pervert. Sig wasn't good but Geraldo did his team in. Geraldo isn't ever going because if he wasn't fired for that effort he never will be.

Geraldo saying he's going to give another $40k to the CG is because he knows he should be the one to go. He's the reason they lost. Yes, it was a weak theme, but without Geraldo's preaching it may have been bearable. At least it would have beat Brandi's "song & dance"! But Trump won't fire his mini me just yet.

I'd love to know if gr actually give the money.

Just saw the question about the CG being government. My guess it is for families of or injured/killed CG. It is a dangerous job, my guess it's like the CG's Wounded Warrior charity. Just a guess...

Edited January 27, 2015 by Thumper82003

[schmickschmack]

From Geraldo's speech to his disgusting chat with the Hooter's girls he should be gone.  What a pervert.  Sig wasn't good but Geraldo did his team in. Geraldo isn't ever going because if he wasn't fired for that effort he never will be. 

 

Maybe if the idiots on that team would all go against Geraldo, he could be gone by now.  But they back down like scared little kids.

I cannot believe I was impressed with Kate.  She finessed him like crazy and got him to back down without a big hissyfit.

[backformore]

The Hooters girls was a horrible idea but I'm confused. The Coast Guard is a federal agency under the U.S. Department. Of Transportation, is it not? How do you make contributions to a federal agency?

I think it's the Coast Guard Foundation, which supports the families of coast guard members.

I cracked up that they thought having the Coast guard boat come by and wave was such a big deal!

[cooksdelight]

I cannot believe I was impressed with Kate. She finessed him like crazy and got him to back down without a big hissyfit.

1) she's used to dealing with children

2) it takes crazy to know crazy

[Crucial]

I cannot believe I was impressed with Kate.  She finessed him like crazy and got him to back down without a big hissyfit.

 

That shocked me too.  I can't believe she was able to do that.  She gets him to back down like that she just may be a future ex-wife, lol.

[Bronzedog]

Thanks, backformore! That makes sense. I really didn't understand that.

[Ffiferoo]

Ugh, the only benefit of Ian as project manager is that it raises his chances of getting fired.  He seriously needs to stfu, there's not even anything funny about his brand of crazy.

[njbchlover]

From Geraldo's speech to his disgusting chat with the Hooter's girls he should be gone.  What a pervert.  Sig wasn't good but Geraldo did his team in. Geraldo isn't ever going because if he wasn't fired for that effort he never will be. 

 

Maybe if the idiots on that team would all go against Geraldo, he could be gone by now.  But they back down like scared little kids.

 

 

Why didn't Kate, Viveca or Sig say something about Geraldo ruining things for the cruise? Why?

 

 

I wish Sig had actually stood up for himself and pointed out the fact that Geraldo caused just as big of a strike against their team as the Hooter's decision did, and all on his own to boot with his tasteless comments.  Everyone seems scared of him, it's ridiculous.

 

When they lost the task, I was cheering in my brain, because I thought that this was the end of Geraldo....and then, friggin' crickets in the board room!!!! 

It is almost as if they all already know who will be going home before Trump announces it!!  There is no back and forth of why one person should stay and one should go (unless it's been edited out for time) - it's just Trump asking ".......who do you think should be fired?", and then next thing you know, the PM is fired and out into the limo.

Geraldo should have been fired.  He was horrible, from the stupid ideas for the theming, to his tasteless "hosting/MC" performance.  Sig had a not-so-great idea with the Hooters girls, but I think Geraldo's poor performance outweighed Sig's bad idea by alot!!! 

[schmickschmack]

Ugh, the only benefit of Ian as project manager is that it raises his chances of getting fired.  He seriously needs to stfu, there's not even anything funny about his brand of crazy.

Ffiferoo, he's looking to get a seat closer to God.  (?????)

[cooksdelight]

Ffiferoo, he's looking to get a seat closer to God.  (?????)

My sister just texted me about that with a "WTF is he talking about? This is a game show thingy!"

[Ffiferoo]

Ffiferoo, he's looking to get a seat closer to God.  (?????)

 

I will never get why anyone would see that as better justification for helping others than the part with the *helping others*.  Like, why let everyone know that you're actually only doing this so you can go to heaven?  He is the worst kind of deluded. 

[backformore]

They name the cruise the Sexiest Catch? That was the first mistake. Makes it sound like something sponsored by match.com . Then, accepting that Geraldo was an expert on EVERYTHING.

People going on a cruise around NYC -tourists, dates, families. Point out the sights, but no lecturing. Somehow, the juxtaposition of hooters girls, cocktails, and a speech about poor downtrodden immigrants, then terrorism? WTF?

[schmickschmack]

I will never get why anyone would see that as better justification for helping others than the part with the *helping others*.  Like, why let everyone know that you're actually only doing this so you can go to heaven?  He is the worst kind of deluded. 

I mean, I don't know Jesus, but I bet he's not a fan of that motivation.

Can we talk for a second about Kenya writhing on the deck of that boat and then getting miffed that Kate didn't put her in charge of her "area of expertise - luxury"?

Edited January 27, 2015 by schmickschmack

[Crucial]

I will never get why anyone would see that as better justification for helping others than the part with the *helping others*.  Like, why let everyone know that you're actually only doing this so you can go to heaven?  He is the worst kind of deluded. 

You help others because it's the right thing to do not as a means to get to heaven.  It is not to be self-serving, it's to be selfless Ian.  If your reason for doing what you are doing is to get a self-serving result then you aren't helping others but instead helping yourself (his case a seat in heaven).  You aren't working for the charity but instead working for yourself.  It's nice they get money but he is disengenious (sp?) on why he is doing it.  He's right though he is a magician because only his kind of illusion on this task was magical.

[Ducky]

I shouldn't have been surprised that Geraldo was not fired yet I kept hoping and hoping... that'll teach me.  Geraldo is in Trump's pocket :P

 

As much as Sig had the awful idea of the Hooter Girls, I felt that Geraldo did way more damage than that... seriously Geraldo... screaming about terrorists on a what is supposed to be a fun tour??

 

 Kenya wasn't much better with the love making to the floor... that look on one kid's face was priceless!

[njbchlover]

I mean, I don't know Jesus, but I bet he's not a fan of that motivation.

Can we talk for a second about Kenya writhing on the deck of that boat and then getting miffed that Kate didn't put her in charge of her "area of expertise - luxury"?

 

Especially when, in the previous task, the guests of the cruise described Kenya and her performance as "tasteless"....so, she thinks she knows "luxury"??  If you've watched Real Housewives, you would know that her home is NOT luxurious at all, and is furnished either by Aarons' Furniture Rent-to-Own shop, or Kirklands.

(Not knocking either Aarons or Kirklands....just that they are not luxury, in my opinion.)

[Bronzedog]

I don't mind that Sig is gone. I don't remember seeing him very involved in any of the previous tasks and I thought tonight he was an ass.

[iwasish]

Please let Kate get fired. Please let Kate get fired. I agree the mascot was a good idea for the family oriented aspect of the Hotel. But that was it . Didn't she waste hours shopping on every task she worked on? Nothing classy or luxurious about anything she presented.

[RedheadZombie]

I was pretty sure going in that Sig's team would lose, because

I accidentally read a spoiler that Brandi makes it to final four - although I'm not sure it's true.

 

 

I don't watch Sig's show, but I thought he should be fired due to his explosion alone.  I think Geraldo did a good job of defusing the situation, and frankly, I thought Kate did a good job of staying calm and not reacting.  I would have been gone.  I can't handle people like him, I completely shut down when someone starts shouting. 

 

I liked that Kate and Vivica almost immediately realized they should join forces instead of turning on each other, and loved their facial expressions during Geraldo's OTT meanderings about The Revolutionary War, and the rest.

 

I thought it was absolutely hysterical when the bartenders showed up, and Geraldo leaped up and ran to them hand outstretched - while his pants were hanging completely open.  The guys looked a little taken aback.

 

I couldn't imagine if I tried, how horrible Kenya's performance would be.  Can that even be considered singing and dancing?  And Kenya, if Brandi Glanville is saying your behavior was trashy, you are in big trouble. 

[RedheadZombie]

THISSS!!!!  Their website extension is .mil! How can they take charity donations?!

 

I used to get frequent phone solicitations to donate to the police - the FOP, I think.  I'm sure the coast guard has something similar.

[Bronzedog]

Kenya has a seven pack of lashes on? Go Vivica!

[backformore]

KIRK CAMERON! That's who Ian was reminding me of with his "seat closer to God" speech.

[cooksdelight]

She didn't see that coming? Is she blind?

[NYGirl]

I swear I have a headache.  It's no wonder I love when women are eliminated and we're left with only men (except for Gary Busey).  Trump reminds me of Judge Joe Mathis..just let them keep talking over each other so the audience has no idea what either one is saying.

 

Ha ha though..I'm so glad Kate is finally gone.

 

I CAN'T wait for next week!!! Woo Hoo

[Crucial]

Good riddance Kate!  I can't say I care if it was right or wrong but I'm glad she's gone.  I needed bigger heels on my boots than with Ian.  Either Kendra or Kate could have been gone but we get drama for next week.  Next week OMG!  Can't wait for it.

[Maire]

There's no crying in Celebrity Apprentice Kate!

[iwasish]

She didn't see that coming? Is she blind?

Her ego is as big as Ian's. That's why she couldn't see it coming. Didn't she discuss what props she would need to fulfill her vision? instead of reading complaining texts, she should have cut Kenya off and reiterated what props were needed and directed both women to get the props and return immediately. If either lady held things up, she should have told the other to finish shopping quickly, catch a separate cab if necessary and get back PRONTO!

Her interactive display looked worse than her efforts for the kids birthday parties. Amateur hour.

There's no crying in Celebrity Apprentice Kate!

Will she bring a stack of bills she can't pay with her to the Today Show?

[ChicksDigScars]

You only had to watch the previews to know why he fired Kate instead of Kenya. Watching Geraldo, Vivica and Kate together next week...boring. Watching Vivica and Kenya get into another cat fight? RATINGS GOLD.  It's all about the drama, and unfortunately for Trump and Burnett's expectations, Kate has been rather low key on that. She's certainly not the same drama queen that she was on DWTS. Plus, if the ladies fight, Donald's pal Geraldo sneaks through the cracks again, That was Trump's entire motive in putting Kenya on that team. He could have actually evened the playing field by giving them a real team player like Leeza. But no. Let's put Vivica, Kenya and Kate together, let them claw each other's eyes out, and Geraldo skates through unscathed. 

 

And really Ian? You're fucking annoying. Could you possibly love yourself any more?

 

I must say that I actually like Don Junior. Eric doesn't seem to have much of a personality, but Donnie always looks like he wants to snark on everyone. I can't believe the three Trumpettes are half Donald Senior. 

[farmgal4]

Kenya Moore is so vile and despicable that she makes Kate G. look like Mother Theresa. Kenya should have been fired IMO.

[cooksdelight]

Who told Kate to dress up as a doorman, Geraldo?

[Eolivet]

I'm not a Kate fan, but she had a great moment during the first boardroom.

 

"Should I fire Vivica?" "No." "Should I fire Geraldo?" :rolls eyes: "...No."

 

That said it all. Even she realizes the fix is in and he's likely there until the bitter end. It's like he has the hidden immunity idol and everyone else knows whoever writes his name down will get sent home instead.

 

And next week: #phonegate? Wow, really, NBC? #youtried #relevancefail #shutup

[mla40]

This episode was comedic gold! Geraldo with his terrorist remark! Ian getting closer to God! Kenya humping the air! Kate saying she never saw that coming!

I haven't actually laughed out loud during any show so many times as I did tonight.

[Steph619]

Ian and his comment about getting a seat closer to God was something else. There was this weird pause after he said that in the talking head that I wouldn't be surprised if whoever else was there was taken aback.

Kenya sure loves stroking Trump's ego especially with that comment about the Trumps being "the first family of America," lol. Kate was the project manager but I thought Kenya should've been fired. I knew she wouldn't be fired though because her drama with Vivica is ratings gold for Trump.

[Apprentice79]

Kenya Moore is something else...She is a snake in the grass and I loved how Vivica would not let her intimidate her. Kenya thinks so highly of herself. She was kissing the Trumps' collective derriere by saying that they were Amerca's First family. I howled with laughter after she said that. It was an obvious ploy to get Brownie points with Donald and his sons..They even looked at her with disdain...I cant stand that woman..she is just as despicable on the Real Housewives of Atlanta..I think that Kenya will not be able to intimidate Vivica like she has been able to do with other women...She is so stealth in her nasty remarks to Vivica alluding to Vivica's plastic surgery and Vivica gave her as good as she got., when talked about her faux behind...lol

[lyric]

I must say that I actually like Don Junior. Eric doesn't seem to have much of a personality, but Donnie always looks like he wants to snark on everyone. I can't believe the three Trumpettes are half Donald Senior. 

I like Don Jr. too, though I did feel a twinge of new found love for Eric when he broke out with an incredulous grin at Kenya proclaiming the Trumps as our First Family.  Good grief...Kenya has zero emotional intelligence.  

 

Heh - yeah, or what Steph619 & Apprentice79 said... ;)

Edited January 27, 2015 by lyric

[Cherrio]

I think Kenya should of been fired because she claimed to be an expert in world class luxury (NOT) and it was her choosing (along with Vivica) the stuff they bought and used. So, she cant have it both ways.   She cant claim innocence when she brought back products that were not luxurious.

           She is definitely much smarter than her usual housewives crowd, of course that's not saying much since its a REALLY dumb crowd. But, she has lied and played dirty most of the time on this show.     

           Did anyone else notice at one point in the boardroom, she had a scary crazy look ?   Her eyes and expression looked insane.

[ParadoxLost]

That said it all. Even she realizes the fix is in and he's likely there until the bitter end. It's like he has the hidden immunity idol and everyone else knows whoever writes his name down will get sent home instead.

 

There was a moment on the boat when Kate and Vivica looked at each other while Geraldo was talking about finding Revolutionary War reenactors and immigrants when I was impressed with both of them because they knew exactly the problem with the team.  Geraldo is an egomaniac that throws tantrums if he doesn't get his way but Trump will never fire him.  I was impressed that Kate actually came up with an approach that could divert him.  But I guess she has eight kids and that is probably about equal to one Geraldo.

 

Ian will never win for one simple reason, his charity.  Its not well known enough for Trump to feel like he gets to bask in the donations that go to it.  Donald loves Make a Wish, the Coast Guard, etc.  People know what they do.  You could tell Ian figured it out when he tacked on 'for kids' when Trump clearly wasn't interested.

 

It was hysterical that Trump gave Sig 25K, then Geraldo promised 40K in the lobby, and then they cut back to Trump reemphasizing his generosity of giving an extra 25K in the board room. 

 

I admit it, I was surprised Kate went.  I can see why Kate didn't argue that much for why she should stay, Kenya and Vivica were making her case for her.  Fired for not being able to control Kenya?  Geraldo was sitting there like he wanted to crawl under the table to escape.

Edited January 27, 2015 by ParadoxLost

[Miss Scarlet]

Oh my god. I'm having trouble writing this post because I'm pretty much speechless at the self-aggrandizing in this episode. From Geraldo to Ian to Kenya.

 

I honestly feel like I have PTSD from hearing Kenya's song and watching her dance. I'm using the words "song" and "dance" loosely.

 

Kate told Vivica that they would have to get push Geraldo to drop his horrible ideas for the boat tour. I said "well, pushing should be something she's good at, considering she had 8 kids!"

 

Ian is a scary kind of crazy because he can actually masquerade as a normal person for a while and then when it comes out that he's totally insane you're just like whaaa? Between that and the fact that I've accepted that we're not going to get a Brenda, Dylan or Brando cameo, it's fine with me if Ian goes soon.

 

Also, when he was talking about how if there were classes on imagination and creativity he would get straight As and then in another separate confessional he mentioned that he had a lot of friends to help him out I thought "well, those friends are probably a product of your amazing, A-level imagination". To quote Michael Scott - Boom. Roasted. 

Edited January 27, 2015 by wudpixie

[NYGirl]

Kate was sitting there with a smug look on her face while Kenya and Viveca were going at it.  It must have really surprised her when Donald fired her.   I giggled.  In the back of my head I knew it was her going because we didn't have the drama of Kenya/Viveca yet.