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Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"


Message added by Mod-Tigerkatze,

Your Pet Peeves are your Pet Peeves and you're welcome to express them here. However, that does not mean that you can use this topic to go after your fellow posters; being annoyed by something they say or do is not a Pet Peeve.

If there's something you need clarification on, please remember: it's always best to address a fellow poster directly; don't talk about what they said, talk to them. Politely, of course! Everyone is entitled to their opinion and should be treated with respect. (If need be, check out the how to have healthy debates guidelines for more).

While we're happy to grant the leniency that was requested about allowing discussions to go beyond Pet Peeves, please keep in mind that this is still the Pet Peeves topic. Non-pet peeves discussions should be kept brief, be related to a pet peeve and if a fellow poster suggests the discussion may be taken to Chit Chat or otherwise tries to course-correct the topic, we ask that you don't dismiss them. They may have a point.

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1 hour ago, DeLurker said:

As a woman of more modest proportions, I have always had a dozen men's shirts in my closest.  A white button down has been a wardrobe staple for me ever since I was in college.  Some are a bit oversized, but the ones for work never were.

What a great idea. I think I’m going to have to go try one on (I may wear a boys size). I have always had trouble finding the “right” one for me. 

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6 hours ago, Wiendish Fitch said:

Clothing manufacturers, is it asking so much to make a white shirt that isn't so sheer that I have to wear 10 different camisoles underneath so no one sees my multitude of sins?!? Seriously, I just want a white top that I can wear over a single bra! Is that really so unreasonable??

Or another gripe for me as a big-breasted/medium-framed woman is a women's button-down shirt that actually has some give in the breast area---nothing bugs me more than a typical button-down shirt that fits me everywhere else perfectly, yet there's that little gaping hole in the breast area that I inevitably have to safety pin closed. How about just designing a shirt that is naturally a hint roomier in that particular area? Most of us need shirts that have some give in the chest area!

Speaking of ladies' shirts, I'm pet-peeving a bit today because my big red n'black heart shirt has a big open neckline and I keep having to constantly check that my white bra strap isn't showing. If I'd bothered to throw on a black or red bra I wouldn't have been as peeved, but this is what I get for not doing my laundry this week.

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You just made me think about bras, and I made the realization that I don't even own a white one--and therein lies a peeve: why do they get so very grubby?! Probably because ever since I escaped the foul conditions of a shared laundry room at an apartment complex, I refuse to handwash them?

Edited by TattleTeeny
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1.  Why would one own a white bra?  All of mine are nude, so they don't show through. No one's skin tone is actually white.

2.  Do you put them in the washer?  I do, but use a lingerie bag and the delicate cycle.  And hang to dry.   The damned things are expensive, I'm going to make them last.

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I have quite a few bras - mostly white as I like white tops and blouses. Trouble is I don't really have much in the way of "filling" a good bra; plus I ind them restricting and suffocating at times, especially summer time. 

I remember when I used to work for an IT company a few months back, it was a hot summer's day and I decided not to wear a bra to work. I could have worn a camisole under my blouse, but I forgot about that. Instead i went to work in just a white blouse. But then 2 or 3 hours later I was called into my supervisor's office and told a complaint had been made by someone regarding the fact my nipples were "visible". I was told to go home, cover up and come back, and make up for any time lost. 

My fault for not putting on a camisole, but all the same, it was quite embarrassing being called in and told off by my boss

Edited by Zola
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1 hour ago, Zola said:

I have quite a few bras - mostly white as I like white tops and blouses. Trouble is I don't really have much in the way of "filling" a good bra; plus I ind them restricting and suffocating at times, especially summer time. 

I remember when I used to work for an IT company a few months back, it was a hot summer's day and I decided not to wear a bra to work. I could have worn a camisole under my blouse, but I forgot about that. Instead i went to work in just a white blouse. But then 2 or 3 hours later I was called into my supervisor's office and told a complaint had been made by someone regarding the fact my nipples were "visible". I was told to go home, cover up and come back, and make up for any time lost. 

My fault for not putting on a camisole, but all the same, it was quite embarrassing being called in and told off by my boss

@Zola, that was WRONG of your office to request that of you. Borderline sexually inappropriate with obvious gender bias, if you ask me. You can't help it if an imprint of your nipple((gasp! Horrors!!)) happens to protrude through your clothes. Who would someone even bother to complain about something so trivial? Like someone had that much time on his/her hands---why are you looking at *anyone's* nipples at work?? 

Good lord, I'll never understand the weirdly uptight overreaction to shit like that courtesy of so many Americans---this is one of many reasons why Europeans laugh at us. Like just look at how Janet Jackson was so villanized for daring to bare a part of her nipple for half a second on the Super Bowl 10 years ago...so ridiculous that some people are *still* so scandalized by seeing a woman's goddamned nipple, even just protruding through fabric or with a baby rightfully attached to it.

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I don't know if it's gender-biased.  I would probably send a man home, if he was wearing something that his nipples were showing also, and I would definitely do so if his penis were showing.   Just not appropriate for work.  As for complaining about it, I'm not a tattletale, so I probably would have just whispered something to @Zola, assuming she didn't realize.

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3 hours ago, Quof said:

1.  Why would one own a white bra?  All of mine are nude, so they don't show through. No one's skin tone is actually white.

2.  Do you put them in the washer?  I do, but use a lingerie bag and the delicate cycle.  And hang to dry.   The damned things are expensive, I'm going to make them last.

1.) Haha, mine is close to it! My tattoo guy loves that--makes his work look brand new years after. I do think I have a nude or two, but most are black or purple or leopard because I am sophisticated!
2.) Same, same, same!

At my last job, we had an outdated employee handbook that sort of implied that leggings were inappropriate, and we also had an HR lady who hated this one young chick in my department. Well, Young Chick had on tan-colored leggings with a long floaty top that most definitely covered her ass, and yet that HR jerk, of her own volition (as opposed to having a complaint brought to her to address) followed her to the bathroom, got in the stall next to her, and said, "Young Chick, looks like you forgot your pants today," which resulted in a meeting about--not with--HR lady, who was actually the one called out for being inappropriate (but she got fired later for allegedly being inebriated at work, so...).

Edited by TattleTeeny
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I own a ridiculous number of bras and panties, in pretty much every color except pink; even though it's mostly just me seeing them, I hate boring underwear.  I also have far more pajamas than any one person should have.  These are my compulsions, apparently.  Okay, maybe shoes, too; I think I have a perfectly reasonable assortment of shoes, but I'm sure some would find it excessive - especially since I spend so much time barefoot. And serving dishes/platters - someone as misanthropic as I am does not need so many, but when I do host, the food is presented on a cool selection of platters and bowls.

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I have only about three bras in rotation. I have a large bust, so I have to buy bras online, and they aren't cheap. I wait for sales and clearances, so I'm left with crazy colors. I wear black all the time, so it isn't a problem. If it were my choice, I would wear black bras all the time, but I don't have upwards of $70+ to spend per bra!

I wear Fruit of the Loom drawers. Only the finest for my nether regions.

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I have mostly boring bras - a few black, some nude, and a leopard print thrown in for good measure (I am a Jersey girl after all).  I loathe underwire bras with the fire of a thousand suns, and they almost never come in fun colors or patterns. Even though I'm usually the only one seeing my bra, sometimes you want to wear something fun.   

For the large-breasted among us looking for button up shirts that don't gap, NY&Company has some that have a little secret snap inside the shirt right where that gap would be.  I like them, but my chest isn't necessarily big, just big for my frame.      

My compulsion is cardigan sweaters.  I own far too many in every color of the rainbow and sleeve length available.  It is a problem. 

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Like @bilgistic, Fruit of the Looms for my loins.

I am...let's say amply endowed and finding a bra that can contain my bounty without creating mono-boob or having a seam across the cup has been a life long ordeal. Jesus. You think that guy looking for the northwest passage had a hard time? Please. Try finding a bra that lifts and separates if you're more than a C cup.

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24 minutes ago, janestclair said:

I have mostly boring bras - a few black, some nude, and a leopard print thrown in for good measure (I am a Jersey girl after all).  I loathe underwire bras with the fire of a thousand suns, and they almost never come in fun colors or patterns. Even though I'm usually the only one seeing my bra, sometimes you want to wear something fun.   

For the large-breasted among us looking for button up shirts that don't gap, NY&Company has some that have a little secret snap inside the shirt right where that gap would be.  I like them, but my chest isn't necessarily big, just big for my frame.      

My compulsion is cardigan sweaters.  I own far too many in every color of the rainbow and sleeve length available.  It is a problem. 

I find that underwire is the only thing that actually holds my boobs up instead of them looking like they are at my knees.

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I shop at barenecessities.com, @ABay. They have a tremendous selection. My only quibble is returns aren't free, but they provide a shipping label for returns and deduct $6.95 for the return shipping from the refunded amount. That's usually cheaper than returning UPS/etc. I usually have to buy three to five bras to find one that fits, then return the rest. I know the brands and types of bras that fit me the best, so I just have to find the exact one.

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Peeve: A few months back, I tried to locate a plain, white button down ladies shirt,,no bell sleeves, ties, strings, and odd things hanging around it.......well....sounds simple.  Right....finally found one that has fancy buttons, liked it, but, it was rather pricey at almost $100.00.  It's on sale now for $26.99, but, they don't have it in my size.  Only one size left.  Oh well.  I might check out their actual storefront store.

https://www.talbots.com/online/blouses-and-shirts/white/poplin-shirt-with-diamonte-buttons-prdi44787/N-10157+4294966752?selectedConcept=&akamai-feo=off

Another peeve. People who just can't stop talking..........Don't most people get tired of talking so much? I suppose not. 

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1 hour ago, SunnyBeBe said:

Another peeve. People who just can't stop talking..........Don't most people get tired of talking so much? I suppose not. 

And have you noticed it's never pleasant, interesting people who talk all the time? It's always the most abrasive, tiresome, awful people who just yammer on and on and on until you want to feed yourself to fire ants.

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2 hours ago, bilgistic said:

I shop at barenecessities.com, @ABay. They have a tremendous selection. My only quibble is returns aren't free, but they provide a shipping label for returns and deduct $6.95 for the return shipping from the refunded amount. That's usually cheaper than returning UPS/etc. I usually have to buy three to five bras to find one that fits, then return the rest. I know the brands and types of bras that fit me the best, so I just have to find the exact one.

I like Hanes Outlet (onehanesplace.com), and prefer the Bali Comfort Revolution panties. They are currently selling panties at 6/$40. I was a big fan of the Barely There line, but it's discontinued now, I think. I haven't seen it in a while. (Upon investigation, I think they renamed it Comfort Revolution) Back when I had boobs, I liked Bali and Olga bras. I wore underwire because mine were lumpy and a bit droopy. That was actually how I found my breast cancer - I was fussing with an ill-fitting cup and reached inside to lift and reseat myself and found a lump deep on the side.

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4 hours ago, ABay said:

You think that guy looking for the northwest passage had a hard time? Please. Try finding a bra that lifts and separates if you're more than a C cup.

Seriously.  That's one of the reasons I have so many bras - any time I find one that fits well and is pretty, I must buy it!  There are several styles I have in two or three colors each. 

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12 hours ago, Sun-Bun said:

@Zola, that was WRONG of your office to request that of you. Borderline sexually inappropriate with obvious gender bias, if you ask me. You can't help it if an imprint of your nipple((gasp! Horrors!!)) happens to protrude through your clothes. Who would someone even bother to complain about something so trivial? Like someone had that much time on his/her hands---why are you looking at *anyone's* nipples at work??

Good lord, I'll never understand the weirdly uptight overreaction to shit like that courtesy of so many Americans---this is one of many reasons why Europeans laugh at us. Like just look at how Janet Jackson was so villanized for daring to bare a part of her nipple for half a second on the Super Bowl 10 years ago...so ridiculous that some people are *still* so scandalized by seeing a woman's goddamned nipple, even just protruding through fabric or with a baby rightfully attached to it.

Zola's in England, I believe.

And actually, my initial thought was that she was lucky this didn't happen today, because she should probably be fired on the spot for displaying her nipples in the workplace and making others uncomfortable.

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1 hour ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

Zola's in England, I believe.

And actually, my initial thought was that she was lucky this didn't happen today, because she should probably be fired on the spot for displaying her nipples in the workplace and making others uncomfortable.

Yes, I'm in England. :)

Actually, when I returned home after being told off by my boss, I looked at myself in my half-length mirror, and despite having a fairly loose-fitting white blouse, it was quite diaphanous, and because I have very dark areola I could just about "see" them, but only from some angles!

I guess I just picked the wrong blouse from the hoards I have in my wardrobe (I don't spend time deciding what to wear on most occasions, just grab & wear). And there was certainly no intent dressing in such a way to outrage public morals in the workplace. And I also checked the T&Cs in my contract, and there was no mention of a "acceptable dress code" other than not to wear any t-shirts with offensive and/or political/religious messages on them. 

But anyway, that's all ancient history, and I've moved on since then. But I do make sure my nipples are suitably covered up whenever visiting customer sites, lol 

Edited by Zola
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Quote

my Flintstones bra

I'm picturing a leopard print with a big blue bow?

My pet peeve is the "bralette" which is apparently a bra that does nothing. I don't know anybody over the age of twelve who wears a bra just for the hell of it. 

I also don't understand matching bras and briefs (the word panty is another peeve of mine). Of course I wash my underwear after every wearing but is the bra supposed to just hang around until after laundry day?

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3 hours ago, Quof said:

Anybody notice JTMacc and MrSmith haven't had anything to say in a while?

Fine.

If you must know, I agree with @Bastet.  I hate boring underwear as well.

I've long been a fan of J Crew boxer shorts. Today's selection is a very dark blue with tiny skull and crossbones. Yesterday was from the Christmas collection, a robin's egg blue featuring station wagons with Christmas trees on top.

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19 minutes ago, Qoass said:

My pet peeve is the "bralette" which is apparently a bra that does nothing. I don't know anybody over the age of twelve who wears a bra just for the hell of it. 

A local radio personality had a double mastectomy (preventative) and had to wear them as not to chafe/rub the skin while she had expanders before she got her implants. Underwire tend to do that and aren't recommended. Me? I wore those mastectomy bras--they are oh so comfortable. But now, post-reconstruction, I'm a wee bit smaller, and will have to buy new bras. I just need to figure out what my size is!

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4 hours ago, GHScorpiosRule said:
4 hours ago, Qoass said:

My pet peeve is the "bralette" which is apparently a bra that does nothing. I don't know anybody over the age of twelve who wears a bra just for the hell of it. 

A local radio personality had a double mastectomy (preventative) and had to wear them as not to chafe/rub the skin while she had expanders before she got her implants. Underwire tend to do that and aren't recommended. Me? I wore those mastectomy bras--they are oh so comfortable. But now, post-reconstruction, I'm a wee bit smaller, and will have to buy new bras. I just need to figure out what my size is!

I had breast reduction surgery 3 years ago this August, went from a 38DD that hung to my navel to a 36C perky as can be for a 50 year old, I am now able to wear a bralette which I LOVE, no pokey underwires, no hooks digging into my back and no thick straps gauging my shoulders. I wear normal (non-underwire) bras to work but at home only a bralette under my tees.

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4 hours ago, GHScorpiosRule said:

A local radio personality had a double mastectomy (preventative) and had to wear them as not to chafe/rub the skin while she had expanders before she got her implants. Underwire tend to do that and aren't recommended. Me? I wore those mastectomy bras--they are oh so comfortable. But now, post-reconstruction, I'm a wee bit smaller, and will have to buy new bras. I just need to figure out what my size is!

If you have a Nordstrom near you, their bra fitters are amazing. I was skeptical, but I went and got fitted years ago, and found I'd been wearing too-small bras literally since I'd been wearing bras in elementary school. I made the fitter find me the cheapest bra on clearance that fit me, because I could barely afford Nordstrom, but it was life changing. I have since been able to fit my mother (and continue to properly fit myself) from learning the principles of proper fit!

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I quit wearing bras on a regular basis once I started working from home full-time. I'm not out in public much, but for trips to the grocery store and so forth, I just put a sweater on over whatever top I'm wearing.  It doesn't matter what the weather is; here in TX if it's 90 degrees outside, you can count on the grocery stores, movie theaters, etc., having the air conditioning cranked up so high that you need a sweater inside. I occasionally see some bras that I like, but for those of us with larger boobs, it always seems as if the really attractive bras are designed for women with small to medium size breasts. Overall, I just dislike wearing bras unless it is some kind of special occasion. What I do find weird about fashion in general is that when it comes to casual clothes such as t shirts and pants, women's clothing is often pretty boring (unless you go to some specialty sites) but women's undergarments are interesting, whereas men's casual clothes are often attractive and look cool, but their underwear is completely boring (not even sure if they still make the men's version of bikini briefs, but those just make the guy look ridiculous). 

As for a pet peeve, just once I would like to be able to cancel a gym membership without then getting charged the monthly fee a month or two after the cancellation. A little over a year ago, I had gotten memberships for myself, my daughter, and a friend of hers. It was fine and I enjoyed the gym, but when we moved this past August, we are now in a completely different part of town. There are some gyms in the same chain that are somewhat closer, but they don't have the features that I liked at the one where I had bought the membership (24 hours on week days, large indoor pool, separate women's workout room, etc.) and so we had all quit going on any sort of regular basis. I may try a different chain that is closer that doesn't require a full year membership. But anyway, I had gone over to the gym at the end of my one-year contract and cancelled all three memberships that were on my account. They required a 30-day notice, and so informed me my card would be charged for the next billing cycle. That happened, and then they charged me yet again the following month. I will say that when I called them, they apologized and processed a reversal of the charges pretty quickly, but I've had bad experiences with gym memberships before. About 15 years ago a chain kept charging my checking account for 3 months or so after I had cancelled, and my bank advised me to close my account and open a new one, because they had encountered so many customers with similar experiences, and that seemed to be the only way to stop the unauthorized charges. 

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That's one of my biggest peeves with going to the gym: expensive membership fees and the hassle of trying to cancel, even when you follow their rules and give sufficient notice they will still try to sneak an extra payment out of you so that you won't notice.

Other peeves with going to the gym: -

People who don't wipe down equipment, benches, or any other gym equipment others might want to use right after. Benches especially, as they can be coated in other people's sweat. But they don't bother to wipe when they've finished.

Guys that start lurking round me just because I'm on my own and in Lycras. They will say things like "Are you okay on that machine?" "Do you need some help with that?" and "What you really need be doing on that machine is... hey, let me show you!"

Peeps that spend far too much time admiring themselves in the mirror or taking selfies while holding a 2kg dumbbell above their heads.

 

So it's very rare I bother with gyms these days, much preferring my own little gym in my garage

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I just got a jury summons to a courthouse over 30 miles from my house. I'm all for doing my duty as a citizen but can't I do it at the one 10 miles away? Apparently not as it specifically states that you can only change venue for hardship, not convenience. Grrr.

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7 hours ago, Zola said:

That's one of my biggest peeves with going to the gym: expensive membership fees and the hassle of trying to cancel, even when you follow their rules and give sufficient notice they will still try to sneak an extra payment out of you so that you won't notice.

Other peeves with going to the gym: -

People who don't wipe down equipment, benches, or any other gym equipment others might want to use right after. Benches especially, as they can be coated in other people's sweat. But they don't bother to wipe when they've finished.

Guys that start lurking round me just because I'm on my own and in Lycras. They will say things like "Are you okay on that machine?" "Do you need some help with that?" and "What you really need be doing on that machine is... hey, let me show you!"

Peeps that spend far too much time admiring themselves in the mirror or taking selfies while holding a 2kg dumbbell above their heads.

 

So it's very rare I bother with gyms these days, much preferring my own little gym in my garage

I don't like working out in front of people anyway (I am just now to the point that I will work out in front of my husband and kids without feeling weird) and the reasons you mentioned above are even more reasons why I will never have a gym membership. I've got a great workout program I use online and an awesome set of Power Block weights at home and other than the initial cost of the weight set everything else is free and no body has my bank account number or is ogling my ass while I work out (besides my husband).

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42 minutes ago, Katy M said:

There was this one gym I liked to go to because there usually wasn't anybody there.  They ended up closing.  I have a sneaky suspicion that the two are linked somehow.

Oh please don’t take it personally. I’m sure it had to do with things that have nothing to do with you. Remember beauty begins on the inside. 

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34 minutes ago, Mindthinkr said:

Oh please don’t take it personally. I’m sure it had to do with things that have nothing to do with you. Remember beauty begins on the inside. 

No, I wasn't taking it personally.  I meant I'm pretty sure that the fact that nobody was ever there had something to do with it closing.

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I feel aggravated often when people use the phrase “all kinds of kids” to refer to describing people who were/are at a certain place. It sounds slightly racist or sexist to me. I realize it’s just a phrase sometime, but if it were me, I’d still say, “all ages of kids were there” or “the event appeared to have a good turnout.” I don’t know. I don’t get angry. No one has to speak exactly as I would. I just think the phrase “all kinds” seems to imply something surprising at best and rude at worst.

I also become annoyed at the use of the word superior, especially when it’s over trivial topics. For example, I feel frustrated when someone states, “a firm mattress is superior to a softer one.” It just seems like an ego boost when something is an opinion. Even when a statement is factual, I think there’s a more polite way to express that. Even saying, “I’ve learned the right way is...” gains less of a side eye from me than saying, “no, —- is a superior choice/way of speaking.” 

Overall, I think confidence is healthy, but something about the word “superior” conveys the speaker has an inflated ego. 

I know that’s irrational and unfair. I just want to share for some reason. 

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4 hours ago, Mountainair said:

I don't like working out in front of people anyway (I am just now to the point that I will work out in front of my husband and kids without feeling weird) and the reasons you mentioned above are even more reasons why I will never have a gym membership. I've got a great workout program I use online and an awesome set of Power Block weights at home and other than the initial cost of the weight set everything else is free and no body has my bank account number or is ogling my ass while I work out (besides my husband).

I have a gym in my apartment and I don't mind working out in front of other people (I know for a fact they're not looking at me), but what is up with the dramatic grunters at the weights? Or, worse, people who insist on singing while on the treadmill?

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There is a particular poster (another thread, not this one!) who posted something particularly vitriolic about me, then sent me a hateful personal message, ending by saying "Don't bother responding, I've blocked you."

I reported the post, and the message and was told "Just ignore it."  So I've ignored her with every possible option  - posts, mentions, etc.  So why am I getting notifications that she is liking my posts, quoting my posts, mentioning me??? 

As they say on Judge Judy "Keep my name out of your mouth (bitch)."

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@Quof That doesn’t sound friendly. I’ve read many of your posts and do not recall anything offensive. I guess to each their own but that would hurt my feelings. How can they “like” if they are blocked, isn’t what’s good for the goose also be good for the gander? 

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Oh, I have no feelings, I'm dead inside.   I'm just disappointed she apparently can't match my level of commitment.   I ignore all of her posts, but her promise to ignore me didn't stick because she is clearly reading mine.  Even if she is, I don't know why I'm getting notifications that she likes or quotes them. What's the point of the "ignore" options?

And I didn't say anything offensive to, or about, her.   I commented on a subject matter I happen to know a lot about.  She chastised me "on behalf of all women", and suggested I "for the love of god, shut up when you don't know what you're talking about."  And then she got nasty.

Edited by Quof
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22 hours ago, Qoass said:

I just got a jury summons to a courthouse over 30 miles from my house. I'm all for doing my duty as a citizen but can't I do it at the one 10 miles away? Apparently not as it specifically states that you can only change venue for hardship, not convenience. Grrr.

It would be great if you can serve.  The justice system needs people of good judgment, but, you might not get called. Do they have a phone number to call the week before to confirm if you really need to show up?  In my area, jurors are paid something by the day.  It's not much, but, it will help with gas. 

 

Peeve:  Neighbors who keep barking dogs outside and seem oblivious to it.  I mean......wouldn't a normal person consider a dog who barks nonstop for 4 hours a nuisance? lol

Edited by SunnyBeBe
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7 minutes ago, SunnyBeBe said:

Peeve:  Neighbors who keep barking dogs outside and seem oblivious to it.  I mean......wouldn't a normal person consider a dog who barks nonstop for 4 hours a nuisance? lol

I'm guessing it is less of a nuisance to them if their dog is barking on the outside instead of the inside.

My dog has a big bark and is a mix of guarding breeds.  His outdoor time stops the minute he starts barking and I never leave him outside if I am not home.  His guarding instincts means he needs to alert me if a squirrel is in the yard, the neighbor opens the garage, a strange car is parked across the street.  He normally stops once I get up to find out what he is barking at.

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15 hours ago, Quof said:

Oh, I have no feelings, I'm dead inside.   I'm just disappointed she apparently can't match my level of commitment.   I ignore all of her posts, but her promise to ignore me didn't stick because she is clearly reading mine.  Even if she is, I don't know why I'm getting notifications that she likes or quotes them. What's the point of the "ignore" options?

And I didn't say anything offensive to, or about, her.   I commented on a subject matter I happen to know a lot about.  She chastised me "on behalf of all women", and suggested I "for the love of god, shut up when you don't know what you're talking about."  And then she got nasty.

What a psycho!! Sorry you had to deal with that madness here, @Quof; I've always thought these boards weren't home to such crazies, which is one reason why I really enjoy it around here---we can safely share our opinions and everyone is expected to respectfully agree or disagree without getting remotely personal or divisive. 

I've escaped several online boards for various reasons, most of them being the insanity of overly-sensitive posters like that. The minute name-calling, superiority issues or random snark goes down, I'm out; that goes for the moderators too---in fact, I know we longtime posters can all admit that these boards are run so much more fairly than they were back when the megalomaniacal staff of Television Without Pity ran things...((shudder))...

And now my evil side is dying to know exactly which poster gave @Quof such Hell---and on behalf of all women everywhere, that crazy commenter doesn't need to speak for the rest of us women.

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Okay, why do people criticize other people on how they celebrate certain holidays?  So one of my family's traditions for the Lunar New Year doesn't involve going to a Chinese restaurant or even eating Chinese (or other East Asian nationality who celebrates the Lunar New Year) food.  So what?  It's what my family has done for more than 30 years.  And we like it.  Typically, this comes from (older) people who are non-Chinese and almost always a child of immigrants.  Are you resenting the fact that my family has created our own traditions that aren't...how shall we put it..."typical?"  That we're more adapted/integrated than your family when you were growing up?  

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2 hours ago, PRgal said:

Okay, why do people criticize other people on how they celebrate certain holidays?  So one of my family's traditions for the Lunar New Year doesn't involve going to a Chinese restaurant or even eating Chinese (or other East Asian nationality who celebrates the Lunar New Year) food.  So what?  It's what my family has done for more than 30 years.  And we like it.  Typically, this comes from (older) people who are non-Chinese and almost always a child of immigrants.  Are you resenting the fact that my family has created our own traditions that aren't...how shall we put it..."typical?"  That we're more adapted/integrated than your family when you were growing up?  

It's for the same reason some people in the U.S. get pissed off if others say "Happy Holidays" instead of "Merry Christmas". Some people think their way is the only way and everyone else is wrong. Some people don't have the capacity to imagine or relate to another person's circumstances or lifestyle or just not attack them for how they live.

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6 minutes ago, bilgistic said:

It's for the same reason some people in the U.S. get pissed off if others say "Happy Holidays" instead of "Merry Christmas". Some people think their way is the only way and everyone else is wrong. Some people don't have the capacity to imagine or relate to another person's circumstances or lifestyle or just not attack them for how they live.

I've never understood what's wrong with saying Happy Holidays. Is Christmas not a holiday? And Thanksgiving? New Years? Unless it's Christmas Day,  (and even then) what's wrong with saying Happy Holidays? 

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