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Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"


Message added by Mod-Tigerkatze,

Your Pet Peeves are your Pet Peeves and you're welcome to express them here. However, that does not mean that you can use this topic to go after your fellow posters; being annoyed by something they say or do is not a Pet Peeve.

If there's something you need clarification on, please remember: it's always best to address a fellow poster directly; don't talk about what they said, talk to them. Politely, of course! Everyone is entitled to their opinion and should be treated with respect. (If need be, check out the how to have healthy debates guidelines for more).

While we're happy to grant the leniency that was requested about allowing discussions to go beyond Pet Peeves, please keep in mind that this is still the Pet Peeves topic. Non-pet peeves discussions should be kept brief, be related to a pet peeve and if a fellow poster suggests the discussion may be taken to Chit Chat or otherwise tries to course-correct the topic, we ask that you don't dismiss them. They may have a point.

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3 hours ago, Bastet said:

If any of it was from a chain restaurant or involved deep dish, I can produce a dozen character witnesses to testify that not even if I was simultaneously starving and broke would I have placed those orders.

Yeah, and what are the odds those "character witnesses" are the same people you shared all those pizzas with, huh? (In my best Edward G. Robinson voice. Fun fact: Edward G. Robinson's brother was my mother's dentist.) 

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19 hours ago, GussieK said:

These are like zombie husbands!  It's so funny.  I actually appreciate their utter guyness.  They know they have to do something, and they are doing it in their inept but doting way.

Some times they're not so cute. I once had a man put his hands around my throat because I had the audacity to be out of yellow roses at 7PM on Valentine's Day. The building management 86'd him from the building. He was also banned at the nearby deli. When the girls would try to hand him his change, he would grab their hands. Jeez, what a creep.

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On 9/29/2021 at 3:31 AM, GaT said:

Or how about the day before Valentine's Day?

AxS00CG.jpg

MMeMv12i2.jpg

While I look at these guys, I immediately hear Comedian * Jim Jefferies in my head:

"Valentine's Day is just for women. There is no man who gets excited by Valentine's Day. There is no man who sees the Valentine's Day decorations go up in the mall and thinks to himself, OOH! Valentine's Day is coming!

Valentine's Day is a mathematical equation that every man has in his head, and it goes like this: How much money do I have to spend today, so you don't act like a [jerk]"  

* Bolded, underlined, and italicized because he said it as part of a comedy routine. It's a joke. These photos remind me of the joke. 

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54 minutes ago, TattleTeeny said:

Man, do I hate when people assume (and react as if) you simply must believe/think/support Scenario B just because you disagree with Scenario A. 

Oh wow, I am with you on this peeve. 

One of my teenagers has been demonstrating this thought process recently, and doing my best to get her to cut the shit.

She's seems to have been watching/consuming a lot of information about a topic where part of the deal is demonizing people who don't agree with everything they say.

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9 minutes ago, JTMacc99 said:

She's seems to have been watching/consuming a lot of information about a topic where part of the deal is demonizing people who don't agree with everything they say.

I'm having the same issue with my teenager - what I am really getting fed up with is the attitude on her part that her elderly grandparents are terrible people if they don't agree with her completely on given issues.  There is no understanding on her part that they were raised very differently and that for their generation they actually are very progressive. Family get togethers are pretty stressful right now!

Edited by SusannahM
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1 hour ago, TattleTeeny said:

Man, do I hate when people assume (and react as if) you simply must believe/think/support Scenario B just because you disagree with Scenario A. 

Or support/believe/think ABC because you're whatever group XYZ (be it female, certain faith, culture, whatever).  And this can come from people from said faith/culture or identify as said gender as well.  Of course, I've brought this up before.

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3 hours ago, peacheslatour said:

Some times they're not so cute. I once had a man put his hands around my throat because I had the audacity to be out of yellow roses at 7PM on Valentine's Day. The building management 86'd him from the building. He was also banned at the nearby deli. When the girls would try to hand him his change, he would grab their hands. Jeez, what a creep.

Good lord. I feel for whatever woman is in his life. Sorry you had to deal with that.

It's not flowers, but when my mom worked in the jewelry department when working retail, she had to deal with similar stuff from guys who waited until the last minute to get something. One guy seemed stunned that they couldn't just magically make up a personalized ring for him for a Mother's Day gift...the night before. 

Seriously, when it comes to dates like Valentine's Day or Christmas or Halloween or whatnot, they never change, and even the ones that aren't on the same date every year, like Mother's Day or Thanksgiving or the like, you know full well what month they fall in, and stores always advertise heavily in the days and weeks leading up to those special days. Want something ready to go by the actual date of the holiday in question? Then learn to plan things out better, people. 

Edited by Annber03
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Seriously, when it comes to dates like Valentine's Day or Christmas or Halloween or whatnot, they never change, and even the ones that aren't on the same date every year, like Mother's Day or Thanksgiving or the like, you know full well what month they fall in, and stores always advertise heavily in the days and weeks leading up to those special days. Want something ready to go by the actual date of the holiday in question? Then learn to plan things out better, people. 

I don't know how many times I had this exact same thought. It's not like it's this big surprise. It's the whole office culture. If one woman's SO sends flowers, the rest of the women feel overlooked, neglected. I think it's stupid but I can see see it.

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19 minutes ago, Browncoat said:

Failure to plan on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part.

I know I've heard that before, but it is worth memorizing.
Or maybe I should just have it printed on a scrap of paper I keep handy.

 

 

1 hour ago, JTMacc99 said:

...One of my teenagers has been demonstrating this thought process recently, and doing my best to get her to cut the shit. She's seems to have been watching/consuming a lot of information about a topic where part of the deal is demonizing people who don't agree with everything they say.

My youngest is 32, and I haven't worked with teens in over 2 years now, so I'd forgotten how susceptible they are to climbing on the bandwagon.
Sorry if my metaphor is so old that the wheels on said bandwagon are falling off and all y'all have no idea what I mean, LOL.

 

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2 minutes ago, shapeshifter said:

I know I've heard that before, but it is worth memorizing.
Or maybe I should just have it printed on a scrap of paper I keep handy.

There are a bunch of signs available with that saying, for people to put up in their offices.  (Or, I guess, at home, as a message to their teenagers.)

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Peeve of the day -- something (probably a mouse) has died in my house, and I cannot locate the carcass to dispose of it somewhere other than my house.  It positively reeks in here!  I've opened the windows to air out the place, but unless I can find the critter, it's going to smell until it finishes decaying.  And it's too cold at night to leave the windows open!  Ugh.  

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Yikes!  That would make for quite an unpleasant experience in your own home.

My current peeve is far more inconsequential: I'm glad I don't live in a market that gets a lot of Cincinnati games, because every NFL season, I swear that if I hear Bengals pronounced "Bangles" by one more announcer, I'm going to lose it.

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2 hours ago, Browncoat said:

Peeve of the day -- something (probably a mouse) has died in my house, and I cannot locate the carcass to dispose of it somewhere other than my house.  It positively reeks in here!  I've opened the windows to air out the place, but unless I can find the critter, it's going to smell until it finishes decaying.  And it's too cold at night to leave the windows open!  Ugh.  

If you're in Rochester, NY I could come find it with my annoyingly acute sense of smell.

Did you check the clothes dryer vent?
And under the refrigerator?

Edited by shapeshifter
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12 minutes ago, shapeshifter said:

If you're in Rochester, NY I could come find it with my annoyingly acute sense of smell

I was trying to think of who here recently mentioned also having this dubious talent; I thought it was you, but wasn’t sure. I’m with you on the annoyingness of it — it is not fun!

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7 hours ago, shapeshifter said:

If you're in Rochester, NY I could come find it with my annoyingly acute sense of smell.

Did you check the clothes dryer vent?
And under the refrigerator?

Yes and yes.  The smell is strongest in the living room. I suspect it’s in one of the HVAC ducts, which means I won’t be able to remove it by myself.  

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1 hour ago, Browncoat said:

I suspect it’s in one of the HVAC ducts, which means I won’t be able to remove it by myself.  

Well, "there's a guy for that," right? (or gal)
And maybe getting the ducts cleaned out would be, you know, "a breath of fresh air"?
Seriously, if I wasn't having to move out of my rental in a month, I might have the ducts cleaned.

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5 hours ago, shapeshifter said:

Well, "there's a guy for that," right? (or gal)
And maybe getting the ducts cleaned out would be, you know, "a breath of fresh air"?
Seriously, if I wasn't having to move out of my rental in a month, I might have the ducts cleaned.

There is, and they advertise on TV all the time.  The dead mouse might just be the motivation I need to call them!

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17 hours ago, Browncoat said:

Peeve of the day -- something (probably a mouse) has died in my house, and I cannot locate the carcass to dispose of it somewhere other than my house.  It positively reeks in here!  I've opened the windows to air out the place, but unless I can find the critter, it's going to smell until it finishes decaying.  And it's too cold at night to leave the windows open!  Ugh.  

My peeve is live mice.  I wish they were dead in a wall.  I hate seeing them scurrying around.  I've set more baits and traps.  We don't have a cat. 

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Knock on wood, I've never had a mouse in the house. I'm a vegetarian who tries to not hurt anything, but I am so frightened of them. 

One of my pet peeves is the fact my favorite comedians can get lewd. I don't mind cursing and risqué jokes if they're tastefully done, but why so vulgar?

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3 minutes ago, GussieK said:

My peeve is live mice.  I wish they were dead in a wall.  I hate seeing them scurrying around.  I've set more baits and traps.  We don't have a cat. 

I will send you my husband. Before we got the cat--and I am truly not making this up--he would take mice that were caught in one of those live traps, put them in the car, and drive them three miles away to release them and make them somebody else's problem. He'd read that if you let them go within a three-mile radius of your house, they'd come back.

I wonder how he found his way back.

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Last winter my cat beat the hell out of a mouse she found in the basement, dragged it upstairs, where it escaped under the door to die in my master closet.  As I was working from home, visits into my master closet were far less frequent than they are when I need my work clothes, I did not discover the corpse for several days.

It took a long time to air out that room. Blech.

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I had rats get into my attic space (I could hear something scurrying above, thought oh no, poked my head through the access panel, and found rat crap), so had to go hunting for the entry point to seal that up (and also reinforced some other vulnerabilities, because that's a big fat NO on rodent infestation).

If a mouse or rat got into the living spaces of my house, I would freak my shit.  Not because I am afraid of them, but because assholes poison them, and if a poisoned animal was caught and consumed by my cat during the time it takes them to suffer a horrible death, she'd become terribly ill and could even die, too.  It's terrible how many neighbors have lost dogs and cats to that shit, and thinking about the wild animals makes me sad, too.

I don't know if she'd even kill, let alone eat, a mouse (she doesn't have the same prey drive many do; she occasionally eats a moth), but I wouldn't risk it; if I found so much as one turd in the house, I'd have a full scale search and destroy operation going on.

That's why when people who heard about my attic rats shuddered and asked, "You don't have any inside the house, do you?" my response was, "We still live here, don't we?"

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Yes, rodent poison doesn't just stay with the rodents who are in people's houses either. 
Last year a flawless, beautiful, large dead owl was laying on the beach having eaten poisoned rodents. 😔

Back in the 80s I loaded the old spring mouse traps with peanut butter, and occasionally the cat would chase a mouse for fun, but, yes, sealing up the entrance points is the only real way to stop the problem.

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On 9/30/2021 at 2:08 PM, JTMacc99 said:

While I look at these guys, I immediately hear Comedian * Jim Jefferies in my head:

"Valentine's Day is just for women. There is no man who gets excited by Valentine's Day. There is no man who sees the Valentine's Day decorations go up in the mall and thinks to himself, OOH! Valentine's Day is coming!

Valentine's Day is a mathematical equation that every man has in his head, and it goes like this: How much money do I have to spend today, so you don't act like a [jerk]"  

* Bolded, underlined, and italicized because he said it as part of a comedy routine. It's a joke. These photos remind me of the joke. 

Ron White, the comedian, had a similar routine where he says De Beers’ slogan should be “Diamonds— that’ll shut her up”

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I don't know if she'd even kill, let alone eat, a mouse (she doesn't have the same prey drive many do; she occasionally eats a moth), but I wouldn't risk it; if I found so much as one turd in the house, I'd have a full scale search and destroy operation going on.

Mine would. She's a Maine Coon and she snatches flies out of mid air.  And...she eats them. I get so freaked that she'll get sick just from that, let alone from eating poisoned vermin.

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On 9/30/2021 at 8:17 PM, Bastet said:

Yikes!  That would make for quite an unpleasant experience in your own home.

My current peeve is far more inconsequential: I'm glad I don't live in a market that gets a lot of Cincinnati games, because every NFL season, I swear that if I hear Bengals pronounced "Bangles" by one more announcer, I'm going to lose it.

When Bob Griese was with ESPN doing color commentary for college games, I hated when he would do a game involving the Wisconsin Badgers, or as Bob said time after time, the Wesconsin Badgers.  Bob, that's not an E in the first syllable, you idiot.  It's not like we cheeseheads expected him to be able to pronounce Oconomowoc, Shawano, or Chequamegon, but Wisconsin?  

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7 hours ago, peacheslatour said:

Mine would. She's a Maine Coon and she snatches flies out of mid air.  And...she eats them. I get so freaked that she'll get sick just from that, let alone from eating poisoned vermin.

We've had two Maine Coon "mixes" (but mostly MC) and I've never seen them do that...well, maybe because they couldn't catch the flies? Our current MC mix, Zoe, is a big girl & makes a lot of noise when she's chasing a fly (or her tiny pet mice). Love these big northern cats.

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9 hours ago, peacheslatour said:

Mine would. She's a Maine Coon and she snatches flies out of mid air.  And...she eats them. I get so freaked that she'll get sick just from that, let alone from eating poisoned vermin.

I looked that up back in Maddie's day, as she could leap into the air, grab a fly between her front paws, hold it there, and then pop it into her mouth in the time between her back legs and front legs hitting the ground. 

Basically, even if they eat a lot of flies of the most dangerous vector it's possible to be, any resulting illness is uncommon and likely to be minor.  I just perused a few results from a quick search, and this seems comprehensive.

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Peeve: unchecked misogyny and casual misogyny. IRL, fictional characters, random person on the internet, it doesn't matter who it is directed at, it is never acceptable. Women liking sex is normal. It does not make her a "slut". It makes her a human. The words "slut" and "whore" need to be eliminated from our vocabulary. They have no purpose but to demean women.

Thank you for coming to my pet peeve TED Talk.

Edited by theredhead77
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On 9/29/2021 at 11:37 AM, bilgistic said:

I'm waiting in the drive-thru line at Walgreens to get a Covid test because our (vaccinated) controller at work tested positive and is apparently fairly sick. I was at work with him on Thursday. I feel fine, but I'm being cautious and am home for the rest of the week.

He hung out by my cubicle Thursday and chatted with me for a few minutes. He was masked; I wasn't--he likes to sneak up on me. I'm tempted to put up a sign to "stay away"!

Quoting myself to update that my test came back negative late Thursday.

My coworker didn't get tested despite having more exposure to our controller and having an eight-year-old daughter AND a mother (with whom she lives) who just 1.5 weeks ago had hip-replacement surgery. She said it was "hard to make time to get tested". I told her I went during the day—while working from home "quarantined" on order by our boss just as she was—because it was due to exposure at the company that I was having to be tested. She asked, "How can you do that?"

What's hard to understand about it?

Edited by bilgistic
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38 minutes ago, bilgistic said:

Quoting myself to update that my test came back negative late Thursday.

My coworker didn't get tested despite having more exposure to our controller and having an eight-year-old daughter AND a mother (with whom she lives) who just 1.5 weeks ago had hip-replacement surgery. She said it was "hard to make time to get tested". I told her I went during the day—while working from home "quarantined" on order by our boss just as she was—because it was due to exposure at the company that I was having to be tested. She asked, "How can you do that?"

What's hard to understand about it?

Probably best to just send your coworker (or tell her if on the phone) where you went to get tested, whether you needed an appointment, and, if so, how you made one, and, finally, assure her it is free. 

"Just the facts, ma'am."

(So you DO NOT slide into the political and totally irrelevant swamp)

Edited by shapeshifter
NOT
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Peeve of the day, no matter what day the 2nd falls on, Saturday, Sunday, holiday Monday,  we have to do our check out for the monthly run.  It's not like Cash Ops actually accepts the file and processes the payments on those days.  No, that happens the next work day.  So, if 2nd is on Saturday, they receive the file on Monday and payments are issued Wednesday.  If we were to do checkout on Monday, they accept the file Monday and the payments are issued Wednesday.

I mean, I finished checkout and I'm here at 11:45 so it's not like it takes 1/2 the day or more, it's just the point that we have to work on the 2nd because 2nd is checkout day.  Not to mention I'm salaried, so no overtime and no, we don't get the time off during the week either.

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19 minutes ago, tiftgirl said:

Not to mention I'm salaried, so no overtime and no, we don't get the time off during the week either.

OOOoooo🤬
"we're salaried" "so no overtime and no, we don't get the time off during the week either" used to really annoy me because in the next breath it was, "we are required to be here 8:30am - 5pm" (even if we worked until 2am the previous night/morning).
[Takes deep breath. Exhales slowly. Takes another one for @tiftgirl]

I loved my job, and was more than willing to work infinite hours for no additional pay, but being told crap like that is so demeaning.

 

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43 minutes ago, MargeGunderson said:

I hate having to fast for medical appointments. I don’t miss the food so much but I really, really miss my morning iced latte. I have a bad headache as a result. 😠

Having had more fasting-required medical appointments (mostly CT scans) than I can remember since my stage IV cancer diagnosis back in 2016, I have figured out a better way (IMO):

  • Schedule your appointment for the afternoon.
  • Then you can eat a nice meal exactly the required 4 or 8 hours before your appointment, instead of the night before, which often means a totally unnecessary frick'n' 12-hour fast.

I once tried to explain this to an elderly woman and her caretaker trying to make an appointment for her next scan.
The elderly woman had said to make the appointment for the scan first thing in the morning since she has dinner at 6 the previous evening. 😩
Sadly, neither of them understood my suggestion, and the person behind the desk making the appointment ignored me too.😞
Maybe my quiet librarian's voice was the problem. I should have been more obnoxious.
Okay.
Title of my memoirs:
I Should Have Been More Obnoxious

Edited by shapeshifter
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4 minutes ago, GHScorpiosRule said:

That is so weird. I’m salaried and I do get paid overtime when I work past 40 hours.

Is it a “depends on what company your work for and their pay policies”?

I worked for a private college, so, yes, that probably had something to do with it. One of my fellow librarians went to a state university library where they had a union and had much better hours and time off.

But another issue is the boss(es). --enough said🙄

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Pet peeve: casual swearing is bad enough IMO anyway but when you swear all the time and then get mad when your kids use the exact same words you use all the time....aargh. What do you expect?

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3 hours ago, shapeshifter said:

Probably best to just send your coworker (or tell her if on the phone) where you went to get tested, whether you needed an appointment, and, if so, how you made one, and, finally, assure her it is free. 

"Just the facts, ma'am."

(So you DO NOT slide into the political and totally irrelevant swamp)

She was questioning the "ethics", I guess, of my doing it on company time. There's some federal protection for employees for Covid illness and testing, but I didn't get into that with her.

If she doesn't care enough to test herself so she'll know her mother who's recovering from major surgery wasn't secondarily exposed, I've got nothing for her.

I live with my boyfriend and didn't want him exposed. I also have a dental appointment Tuesday and needed to know if I could keep it (even though I felt fine). I could've been an asymptomatic carrier.

Edited by bilgistic
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4 hours ago, theredhead77 said:

Peeve: unchecked misogyny and casual misogyny. IRL, fictional characters, random person on the internet, it doesn't matter who it is directed at, it is never acceptable. Women liking sex is normal. It does not make her a "slut". It makes her a human. The words "slut" and "whore" need to be eliminated from our vocabulary. They have no purpose but to demean women.

Thank you for coming to my pet peeve TED Talk.

I’ve always had a hard time even understanding what a “slut” is. I mean, I know what and whom the word is used for but it just doesn’t make sense in a way I’m having a hard time articulating. It’s a stupid concept. That said, my likeminded friends and I have been known to call each other it in jest; we neither mean it nor would care of any of us actually was a so-called “slut.” Not very evolved of us, but we’re fake-mean jerks! 

I also hate judgment about how many sex partners people have had based only on the number and ignoring someone’s age. Like, OK, if I had my number now when I was 16, maybe something would be up with me (not that it’s the general public’s business). And OK again,  if someone said, say, 100, maybe that sounds like a lot if you don’t consider other things. But it’s not if someone is about 60 years old! (Or, to clarify, any age as long as she’s a consenting partaker — a woman can have 365 a year for all I care; the numbers I used here are just examples to illustrate the peeve of people judging someone’s number at all based on what they deem appropriate for women.)

Edited by TattleTeeny
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14 minutes ago, bilgistic said:

If she doesn't care enough to test herself so she'll know her mother who's recovering from major surgery wasn't secondarily exposed, I've got nothing for her.

This is like the opposite side of the coin from people who get tested, despite having no contact with Covid and no symptoms, apparently because they figure  negative test now gives them immunity going forward...I guess?  Anyway she can put her fingers in her ears and go "nah nah nah I can't hear you" but as the saying goes "Covid doesn't care whether you believe in it or not" if she's got it, she's got it.

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15 minutes ago, TattleTeeny said:

I also hate judgment about how many sex partners people have had based only on the number and ignoring someone’s age.

The cutoff number was officially established way back in the 1970s. I don't think we need to re-litigate it.  😉

 

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I love on Roseanne when Fred asks Jackie how many partners she's had, and she figures maybe three a year, so three a year for 20 years is 60 people:

Fred: I don't even know sixty people.
Jackie: Well, I didn't know all of them.

Because I like that it illustrates the above point that judging the number of people a woman has had sex with is wrong, full stop, but also pretty stupid when you flip out about a "high" number without taking into account dating history.  So, OMG, 60 people?! is wrong because who is anyone to judge, but it's also dumb because that works out to a measly three people in a given year. 

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20 minutes ago, Bastet said:

I love on Roseanne when Fred asks Jackie how many partners she's had, and she figures maybe three a year, so three a year for 20 years is 60 people:

Fred: I don't even know sixty people.
Jackie: Well, I didn't know all of them.

Because I like that it illustrates the above point that judging the number of people a woman has had sex with is wrong, full stop, but also pretty stupid when you flip out about a "high" number without taking into account dating history.  So, OMG, 60 people?! is wrong because who is anyone to judge, but it's also dumb because that works out to a measly three people in a given year. 

Fred: "So you started at 16?"

Jackie: "Sure, let's go with that."

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