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Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"


Message added by Mod-Tigerkatze,

Your Pet Peeves are your Pet Peeves and you're welcome to express them here. However, that does not mean that you can use this topic to go after your fellow posters; being annoyed by something they say or do is not a Pet Peeve.

If there's something you need clarification on, please remember: it's always best to address a fellow poster directly; don't talk about what they said, talk to them. Politely, of course! Everyone is entitled to their opinion and should be treated with respect. (If need be, check out the how to have healthy debates guidelines for more).

While we're happy to grant the leniency that was requested about allowing discussions to go beyond Pet Peeves, please keep in mind that this is still the Pet Peeves topic. Non-pet peeves discussions should be kept brief, be related to a pet peeve and if a fellow poster suggests the discussion may be taken to Chit Chat or otherwise tries to course-correct the topic, we ask that you don't dismiss them. They may have a point.

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(edited)
On 6/24/2018 at 10:39 AM, Sun-Bun said:

At least baseball/golf games don’t seem to get drunk fans remotely as s******.

Because they are not really sports.   Golf is just an excuse for rich guys to commandeer a huge amount of real estate, turn it into lawns,   and not let anyone else set foot on it. It's Trump's favorite sport (or so I'm told).    Baseball is a game and a pastime and while I love it - if you ever watched baseball in a bar in say, NYC or Boston or Philadelphia you would see as much drunken bellowing and fighting as you would over football or hockey.

 

On 6/24/2018 at 4:37 PM, backformore said:

I HATE that so many casual restaurants (the kind we can afford to go to)  have TVs all over the place

I kind of agree up to a point.  One of my favorite things about the various ethnic restaurants in NYC , esp. in the outer boroughs is that they so often have foreign language TV on.  I've been known to dawdle about taking out my Indian takeout while watching the Bollywood movie up on the wall.  And the various Greek/Albanian/Balkan whatever versions of MTV are mesmerizing.

Edited by ratgirlagogo
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7 hours ago, partofme said:

 

I live in NYC so even the "cheap" hairstylists are expensive.   I also had to have my gray covered and got highlights so it cost me almost $300 for a cut that I hate.  It was a new stylist.  Though this beats the lady I went to last summer who told me she couldn't get my highlights blonde because I had used a rinse out hair color in between hair cuts and still charged me $400.

Holy shit! 

I pay between $80 and $100. I  go every 8 weeks to get my "silver sparkles" covered up, and either a cut or highlights ( I alternate, so every 16 weeks I get a haircut, the other times I get highlights).

There are cheapo places,  but I don't trust them. If it cost $300 here, I'd buy hair dye and do it myself, and grow my hair out all one length and cut it myself too.

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12 hours ago, bilgistic said:

I am "chesty" and I always have boob sweat. I guess it's technically under- and between-the-boobs sweat. I'll get out of the coldest shower I can stand and minutes later...boob sweat. I wear oversized cotton t-shirts at home so the air can circulate.

Fortunately I only get "boob sweat" when I go out long distance running (which is something I do on a regular basis); that said, my <flattish> chest does "glisten" a little when its hot and humid when I'm sitting at a desk or in a datacentre doing so IT work for a client. But its the bra that really peeves me off - I know its only doing its job, but golly gosh I feel like I am being crushed round the chest when its hot and sticky, and my boobs are crying out to "breathe"

This morning I am WfH. It's 28°C outside, and slightly warmer here in my office, but at least I can wear a low cut blouse and enjoy some cool "freedom" without a friggin' bra :)

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I used to go to Ulta, had decent luck with the stylists there but my cut is pretty basic. The only thing I hated was their 'level system' which was great for them, a promotion of sorts but terrible for me since the cost kept jumping. 

The person I go to now is at a salon that has a similar system to Ulta but I love her and I'll pay what ever the salon sets her scale at. She'll also cut my bangs for free between cuts, where Ulta would charge nearly $20.

It sounds cheesy but check out beauty colleges and ask for someone at a higher level. I've had some of my best cuts at a cosmetology school.

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11 hours ago, bilgistic said:

It's $150ish here for color and cut.

That’s what the going rate is in my neck of the woods too. I try to go as long as possible in between as I don’t want to budget that every month. I’ve thought of investigating to find someone who can do it for less but the gal who does my hair listens to what I want and really tries to get it right. I remember once I was having a date and she gave me a free wash and blow dry. 

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Once or twice a year I splurge and use a coupon for a $9.99 shampoo & cut.  I have long straight hair and no "style", so anybody with a pair of sharp scissors and the ability to cut in a straight line could do it.  ;-)

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I am not very imaginative with my hair-  more often than not I will let it grow down my back until it gets in the way; or I will crop it back into a bob. The idea of spending £100+ for a new style doesn't do much for me, especially if the stylist's "vision" differs to my own!

I did read somewhere that constant cutting, styling and general messing about with one's hair over a period of time can make your hair become dull and lifeless over time. Not sure how true that is, but I just go for a cut when it needs it.

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20 hours ago, Zola said:

Because I'm a consultant I do spend a lot of my time working from home, which means I can wear t-shirts, blouses or camisoles with nothing underneath; or I might even walk around topless in my own home on really hot days!

worthless27.jpg

:-)

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18 hours ago, bilgistic said:

I am "chesty" and I always have boob sweat. I guess it's technically under- and between-the-boobs sweat

I feel your pain, @bilgistic: fellow “chesty” boob sweat sufferer here as well. I’ve always been ample up there, but I was certainly not prepared for them to literally size up like balloons after I hit 40!

Which reminds me—-several months ago I got a ticket thanks to my boob sweat. I was driving home downtown from work...boob sweat rolling down my chest making me stabby...so I remove my seat belt and am dabbing away with a tissue under my shirt to just get some relief...cue a motorcycle cop suddenly come behind me with lights ablaze. Because I had taken my belt off for a few minutes to dab my boob sweat, he cited me, that dick—-$75 for my folly!!! I tried to politely explain the sitch, but Sergeant Dickface was having none of it. Oh well.

So be careful out there, fellow chesty one’s.

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I really don't like it when someone makes fun of bald men.  I'm not a man, nor am I bald, but, it just bugs me. 

Another peeve is when a store freely gives coupons, but, they have so many exclusions that they are basically worthless.

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@Zola Try being a 30B!!!  You can't find bras ANYWHERE!  I sometimes get by with a 32A, but I find that I can only wear those at home.  As for brands, The Little Bra Company has some styles which I find comfortable and can wear any time.  They're pricy though - especially since I'm buying internationally (they're based in California (LA, I think) and I'm in Toronto).  The size thing is definitely a pet peeve of mine.  Worse is when people don't "get" that there are adults who are tiny.  

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5 hours ago, Sun-Bun said:

Sergeant Dickface was having none of it. 

The only speeding ticket I have every gotten was given to me by my cousin.  It was also the first time I had ever been stopped for speeding.  He refused to give me a warning.  So, I said the only thing I being a good Southern girl could think of.  "Raphael, I'm telling your momma!"  I still got a ticket, but, he got a smack on the side of his head and a lecture...... and he had to apologize to me!

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My first ticket wasn't doing much over the limit. In fact, my Dad said if I was going to have to pay for a ticket, earn it. He also said you can drive as fast as you want to, as long as you aren't the fastest one in sight, who will serve as a "lightning rod" for the police. It usually works, but not always. So that's my peeve.

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I remember discussing this with my friend in high school after I'd first started driving. What she said has stuck with me since then. I said something like, "The cop's not going to stop me if I'm going the same speed as everyone else when we're all speeding." She said, "He can stop whoever he wants."

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Once or twice a year I splurge and use a coupon for a $9.99 shampoo & cut.  I have long straight hair and no "style", so anybody with a pair of sharp scissors and the ability to cut in a straight line could do it.  ;-)

I had just-past-my-shoulders hair length in junior high and high school and either wore it in two ponytails on the side (secured by yarn bows. Classy!) or flipped up in the back held by a rawhide hair clip (Marcia Brady wore hers like that sometimes).  And, except for a brief period of about a year in the late 80s when I grew it out to please my boyfriend at the time (and also got a really ugly perm), I've kept it short short short and added no color (so it's almost all gray now.  Used to be blonde).  So, several times a year I spend the princely sum of about $20 (cut plus tip) at what used to be a Fantastic Sam's and get the most basic cut possible.  I hate fooling with my hair and it is too fine to hold most types of hair paraphernalia (or a curl) so I keep it short.  I love to be able to wash it, comb it out and by the time I get dressed and to work it's dry.   

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So for the 2nd year in a row now, my car breaks down and has to go in the shop just days before my birthday! Yay! Last year, it was the battery and tires--this year, the alternator caused my car to stall.

Also, I had to go in to renew my license this year, and my beautiful photo of my 25 year old self was sadly replaced with a horrible photo of 35 year old me. The "before" and "after" is truly heartbreaking.  I begged the DMV to keep my old license photo but sadly, it wasn't meant to be. And now, with the new license design, instead of just having the photo in the top left corner, there are 3 copies of this ugly photo on my card. Once in the top left corner, and two mini-versions enclosed in silver circles on the front and back. Just horrendous.

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2 hours ago, bilgistic said:

I remember discussing this with my friend in high school after I'd first started driving. What she said has stuck with me since then. I said something like, "The cop's not going to stop me if I'm going the same speed as everyone else when we're all speeding." She said, "He can stop whoever he wants."

One time, a friend told me he had been stopped for speeding, and he asked the cop why he stopped him, when everyone else was going the same speed.  The cop asked him "You ever go fishing? Did you catch all the fish?"

I usually keep it less then 10 over the limit, I have a very good radar detector, and I try not to be the first in a group of vehicles - usually there's someone out there faster than me, and I'm glad to let him be the bait.

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I usually keep it less then 10 over the limit, I have a very good radar detector, and I try not to be the first in a group of vehicles - usually there's someone out there faster than me, and I'm glad to let him be the bait.

I remember when years ago some of my co-workers and I went to a town about 4 hours away to help sort books at a library that was closing.  We stayed overnight and on the way home, the person driving somehow managed to get our van (there were about 6 of us on the trip--a van full of women) into a convoy of semis.  One truck driver moved over and let us get in between two other trucks ('in the cradle'?) and we all went speeding mightily down the interstate at a speed that we probably shouldn't have been going (I'm sure it wasn't that fast, though!).  We enjoyed the ride for a lot of miles before we needed to exit so she signaled, they let us out and with some lights blinking and horns blowing, we went our way and the trucks went theirs.  I'll never forget that--it was very exhilarating. 

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2 hours ago, Moose135 said:

I usually keep it less then 10 over the limit, I have a very good radar detector, and I try not to be the first in a group of vehicles - usually there's someone out there faster than me, and I'm glad to let him be the bait.

We call that driver the rabbit. You find the rabbit and stay a nice distance behind him/her, assuming they're not driving like a maniac (and hope for the best). 

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9 hours ago, SunnyBeBe said:

I really don't like it when someone makes fun of bald men.  I'm not a man, nor am I bald, but, it just bugs me. 

Another peeve is when a store freely gives coupons, but, they have so many exclusions that they are basically worthless.

Yeah, I don't like when people make fun of a guy for being bald either - it happens.  I also don't like putting down men for not being tall, as though "tall"  is some mark of character.  

And coupons?  My grocery store has started this new thing.  It used to be if something is on sale "2 for $5"  that mean I could buy 1 for $2.50.  Now, suddenly, there are disclaimers that the sale price only applies with a minimum purchase.  So a 12 pack of the carbonated water I buy is "3 for $10, must buy 3".    And coupons will be the same  - $1 off, but you have to buy more than one.  

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Ugh, yearly peeve: Hallmark channel has announced its "Christmas in July" movies. This means I have no late-night TV to fall asleep to for WEEKS! TV to fall asleep to, for me, is a tough call: it has to be something I like but not something so new and interesting that I feel the need to carefully look and listen, so Frasier (my favorite!) and Golden Girls are perfect! But now I will have to channel surf. And yes, when the thing I settle on changes to something else (that I don't like) at 2 a.m., I will wake up!

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It's bad enough they replace their regular programming in winter with their Christmas dreck, but in July?!  It pisses me off every year, too; ruining my Golden Girls fix is one thing, but to do it for that crap is all the more annoying.

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3 hours ago, bilgistic said:

Who's making fun of bald men? I usually find bald men attractive--IF they embrace the baldness and shave their head. Hanging onto the lifesaver hairdo does no one any favors.

I do prefer bald men to guys who have to resort to "comb overs" with their remaining few strands of hair, as if people wouldn't notice. 

The only problem with bald guys is that - over here at least - they can be easily mistaken (stereotyped) for skinheads - antisocial hooligans!

But by and large I think most bald men carry themselves very well, and don't seem to be bothered by the lack of hair on top because it's no big deal these days.

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10 hours ago, backformore said:

And coupons?  My grocery store has started this new thing.  It used to be if something is on sale "2 for $5"  that mean I could buy 1 for $2.50.  Now, suddenly, there are disclaimers that the sale price only applies with a minimum purchase.  So a 12 pack of the carbonated water I buy is "3 for $10, must buy 3".    And coupons will be the same  - $1 off, but you have to buy more than one.  

A related grocery store peeve:  Some weeks the same store is running multiple specials:  Buy 4 items (mix & match) & get $5 off and Buy 6 items (mix & match) & get $5 off.  Keeping track of which items are in the 4 group vs the 6 group makes me crazy.

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9 hours ago, Bastet said:

It's bad enough they replace their regular programming in winter with their Christmas dreck, but in July?!  It pisses me off every year, too; ruining my Golden Girls fix is one thing, but to do it for that crap is all the more annoying.

It’s astonishing just how awful those Hallmark/Lifetime movies are too. Who actually watches and enjoys them?!

I did watch part of one the other night just because I was bored and half-drunk. It was actually called “Stalked by a Reality Star”—-dear god, worst trash ever!! The acting was godawful and the writing was even worse. I did enjoy the horrific acting for comedic purposes though.

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12 hours ago, harrie said:

We call that driver the rabbit. You find the rabbit and stay a nice distance behind him/her, assuming they're not driving like a maniac (and hope for the best). 

Never heard it called rabbit. Is that because in dog races they’re always chasing the rabbit? I’ve always heard the term bear bait. 

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4 minutes ago, Sun-Bun said:

It’s astonishing just how awful those Hallmark/Lifetime movies are too. Who actually watches and enjoys them?!

I did watch part of one the other night just because I was bored and half-drunk. It was actually called “Stalked by a Reality Star”—-dear god, worst trash ever!! The acting was godawful and the writing was even worse. I did enjoy the horrific acting for comedic purposes though.

It's saved on my DVR for one of those "I just can't.../vodka" nights after a rough work day!

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21 minutes ago, Mindthinkr said:

Never heard it called rabbit. Is that because in dog races they’re always chasing the rabbit? I’ve always heard the term bear bait. 

My Dad called them lightning rods.

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30 minutes ago, Sun-Bun said:

It’s astonishing just how awful those Hallmark/Lifetime movies are too. Who actually watches and enjoys them?!

I did watch part of one the other night just because I was bored and half-drunk. It was actually called “Stalked by a Reality Star”—-dear god, worst trash ever!! The acting was godawful and the writing was even worse. I did enjoy the horrific acting for comedic purposes though.

We watch them sometimes on the weekend, after chores and grocery shopping.  We crack up over the "themes"  they will run back-to-back.  Like "the Perfect Husband"  followed by "the Perfect Nanny,"  "The perfect Mother,"  and then "The Perfect Daughter".   

It's "perfect" watching when you're home sick.  

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1 minute ago, backformore said:

We watch them sometimes on the weekend, after chores and grocery shopping.  We crack up over the "themes"  they will run back-to-back.  Like "the Perfect Husband"  followed by "the Perfect Nanny,"  "The perfect Mother,"  and then "The Perfect Daughter".   

It's "perfect" watching when you're home sick.  

Yes!!! And they all turn out to be complete psychos. According to these movies, there are all sorts of sociopathic killers lurking among us.

Actually, I saw part of one the other day and friggin’ Michael Madsen was playing a swimming coach and it made me very sad. It must hurt to go from starring in Tarantino flicks and other major Hollywood films to having to star in this kind of dreck.

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1 hour ago, Sun-Bun said:

It’s astonishing just how awful those Hallmark/Lifetime movies are too. Who actually watches and enjoys them?!

My girlfriend watches them, mostly in a "mindless, background" sort of way.  I like to play a game where I watch about 5 minutes of it, then try to figure out how it ends.  I'm right more often than not.

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12 hours ago, bilgistic said:

Who's making fun of bald men? I usually find bald men attractive--IF they embrace the baldness and shave their head. Hanging onto the lifesaver hairdo does no one any favors.

I'm with you @bilgistic, bald men who embrace the baldness are sexxxy!! Comb-overs, "fluffing", or hairpieces are a turn off to me, I have yet to see a bald head that is unattractive, let it go!

 

13 hours ago, backformore said:

I also don't like putting down men for not being tall, as though "tall"  is some mark of character.  

Height is not an issue for me either, however I have met short men who have a terrible "short man syndrome" where they feel they must overcompensate for their lack of stature by being bossy, nasty, loud mouths. 

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46 minutes ago, GoodieGirl said:

Height is not an issue for me either, 

I think a man's height is just one of those physical characteristics that "does it" for some women and doesn't matter for others. And it's hard to say that it's right or wrong (not that anybody here is saying it's right or wrong), because it's a subjective measure of attractiveness. Hair is another one. 

What is wrong is belittling someone for a physical characteristic. Enough of that and you'll whip up a pretty good case of short man syndrome.

Height is one of the things you can specify you are looking for in a person on Match . com.  It is not uncommon for me to see women say they are looking for 5'11" to 6'5". And this isn't just women who are 5'10"  Women who are 5'5" or 5'6" make this a requirement. And that's fine! If when they're in heels and are eye to eye or taller than their date it's a buzz kill, so be it. 

Interestingly the last person I went on a date with was 5'9", so almost eye to eye with me, and she didn't list any preferred height. (And I just remembered that when I asked her if her daughters were tall like her, she said no, they're short like their father. Heh.)

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9 minutes ago, JTMacc99 said:

What is wrong is belittling someone for a physical characteristic. Enough of that and you'll whip up a pretty good case of short man syndrome.

Absolutely, and please don't think I have ever done that, I am 5'4" for the record, and my e-harmony dating profile did not mention a height restriction, I don't care about that. I had one date with a guy the same height as me, unfortunately he made a disparaging remark about cats being dirty, and since my profile did highlight my love of felines and the fact that I had 4 of them at the time, I declined to go on a second date with him. 

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When I was in college, the best friend of my best friend's boyfriend (got that?) was short; I can't call up the memory clear enough to give a guess, but noticeably short - I'm 5'9" (or at least I was then; maybe closer to 5'8" now) and was probably only wearing an inch of heel and he was by far the shortest guy I'd ever danced with.

Which brings me to my story.  We were at a party that was a lot of fun except for the part where during a designated song, all the women were supposed to ask a man for a dance.  There is so much wrong with that, but let's skip it for now.  I had already been planning to ask "Mike" (I cannot remember his name, and refuse to call him Shorty, so let's just say Mike), because if I was going to engage in this ridiculous exercise, it might as well be with someone whose company I knew I enjoyed, but when it was announced this stupid dance was coming soon, the boyfriend came over and asked me if I would ask Mike, because he didn't want him left standing there - which, at his height, happens to him a lot at parties. 

Can you imagine how picked on he must have been as a kid once everyone started outgrowing him?  What school dances were like?  And that it was still such a big deal in college?  But no Napoleon complex at all; he was a nice guy.  If I was otherwise attracted to him, I don't think our height disparity would have bothered me.  (I do wonder about certain logistics when there's a big difference in heights, but some of these couples pop out kids, so obviously there are positions that work.)

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I'm 5'8" (well, 5'7 3/4" per the nurse who measured me yesterday).  The guys I have gone out with were basically my height (5'8" - 5'10") or in the 6'3" - 6'6" range.  I can't think of anyone who fell in the middle range.  It is about a 50/50 split between the two height ranges.

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42 minutes ago, Bastet said:

  (I do wonder about certain logistics when there's a big difference in heights, but some of these couples pop out kids, so obviously there are positions that work.)

Ha! Yeah, you need to get out the mental protractor to work out some angles. 

Where there's a will, there's a way.

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I have to say that I prefer a taller guy, only because I'm 5'7, like to wear 3 inch wedge heels, and am...let's say not petite, and with a small guy I feel a bit like I'm hulking over him. Having said that, my husband is only an inch taller than me, so my preference wasn't a requirement in the end. 

As for bald guys, well, there was one season of Criminal Minds where Shermar Moore's character had very short hair. I like to pretend it doesn't exist and that he was always deliciously bald. 

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Gah! My latest pet peeve is canned cat food. I can never, ever seem to feed my cats without getting nasty, slimey cat food on my counter top, my hands and/or my clothes. I am very careful but that only make me clumsier. Gah!

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3 hours ago, MargeGunderson said:

I have to say that I prefer a taller guy, only because I'm 5'7, like to wear 3 inch wedge heels, and am...let's say not petite, and with a small guy I feel a bit like I'm hulking over him. Having said that, my husband is only an inch taller than me, so my preference wasn't a requirement in the end. 

As for bald guys, well, there was one season of Criminal Minds where Shermar Moore's character had very short hair. I like to pretend it doesn't exist and that he was always deliciously bald. 

I find black men - and only black men - can make bald look hot.  Every other ethnicity ends look looking like a genie - or worse, a skinhead.  

I'm only 5'2", so there really aren't many men shorter than me!  When I was dating, I DID say that my minimum was 5'7" though. 

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4 hours ago, Bastet said:

I do wonder about certain logistics when there's a big difference in heights, but some of these couples pop out kids, so obviously there are positions that work.

Mom is 5'1", Dad was 6'2". My sister is the shortest at 5'2", I'm 5'6", and both brothers are about 5'10", so it does work. <weg> Mom didn't know how tall Dad was when she met him because he whistled at her in his car and then came back around to chat.

2824.jpg.f88cd94f0f6ab5685a5824b6a5849174.jpg

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