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Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"


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Your Pet Peeves are your Pet Peeves and you're welcome to express them here. However, that does not mean that you can use this topic to go after your fellow posters; being annoyed by something they say or do is not a Pet Peeve.

If there's something you need clarification on, please remember: it's always best to address a fellow poster directly; don't talk about what they said, talk to them. Politely, of course! Everyone is entitled to their opinion and should be treated with respect. (If need be, check out the how to have healthy debates guidelines for more).

While we're happy to grant the leniency that was requested about allowing discussions to go beyond Pet Peeves, please keep in mind that this is still the Pet Peeves topic. Non-pet peeves discussions should be kept brief, be related to a pet peeve and if a fellow poster suggests the discussion may be taken to Chit Chat or otherwise tries to course-correct the topic, we ask that you don't dismiss them. They may have a point.

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1 hour ago, Lady Whistleup said:

All the female guests had to wear like a lilac color because lilac was the color scheme.

That would have been reason enough for me not to go. Lilac looks terrible on me. 😉

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37 minutes ago, supposebly said:

That would have been reason enough for me not to go. Lilac looks terrible on me. 😉

My bridesmaid's dresses were extremely plain because one of them was my fourteen year old cousin and one of the other's was my boss' seven months pregnant daughter. I didn't have many girlfriends after high school because everybody kind of scattered all over the world. They were just simple empire waist, square necked linen things and yes, they were lavender. But in my defense, my wedding flowers were lilacs and it never would have occurred to me in a million years to expect our guests to coordinate with that.

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And these wedding stories again remind me of why I am so grateful to have been a hippie bride. My husband and I both wore white cotton Tibetan garments (like being in pajamas all day - so comfortable!) and we had a "best person" (who eventually wound up as my son's godfather) and I certainly did not tell him or anybody else what to wear. I had a bouquet of white roses and before the ceremony started we made sure everyone was happily drinking my favorite punch recipe (one third vodka, one third champagne, one third pineapple/orange juice, well stirred and chilled). One of my pet peeves in life is when anyone throws a party (and this includes a wedding party) and doesn't make sure *everyone* is having a good relaxed time.

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8 minutes ago, isalicat said:

And these wedding stories again remind me of why I am so grateful to have been a hippie bride. My husband and I both wore white cotton Tibetan garments (like being in pajamas all day - so comfortable!) and we had a "best person" (who eventually wound up as my son's godfather) and I certainly did not tell him or anybody else what to wear. I had a bouquet of white roses and before the ceremony started we made sure everyone was happily drinking my favorite punch recipe (one third vodka, one third champagne, one third pineapple/orange juice, well stirred and chilled). One of my pet peeves in life is when anyone throws a party (and this includes a wedding party) and doesn't make sure *everyone* is having a good relaxed time.

That punch sounds divine!

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When did these bridezilla type weddings start? Was it in the 80's or 90's? Where did these gals get the idea that because they'll be the only  ones in a white gown & veil, that they're the queens or empresses of the whole event? AFAIK, I haven't attended a bridezilla wedding. All the brides were gracious & appreciated their guests.

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6 hours ago, Hangin Out said:

I grew up in Ozone Park Queens too.  Got married and moved to Long Island.  Whenever I go out of state, everyone knows where I’m from by the N.Y. Accent. 

Many, many years ago we were vacationing in Hawaii. We went out to dinner & at the end of the meal, the waiter asked me what part of New York I was from. Naturally, I asked  him how he knew I was from New York, & he said "you just told me that you didn't want any cawfee". I moved from New York eons ago, but the accent stayed.

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3 hours ago, Lady Whistleup said:

Have you guys ever been to color-schemed weddings? Where the guests (not just the bridesmaids) have to dress in a certain color to fit the "color scheme"?

Oh, dear.  No, I haven't - I've never been invited to such a thing, and wouldn't go if I was.  Bad enough being put in a costume as part of the wedding party, but hell no to subjecting myself to that as a guest.

7 hours ago, shapeshifter said:

Lately I have been enjoying using "all y'all"

Y'all (or all y'all, which is my preferred version, especially in uses like "fuck all y'all") is a wonderful addition to a language that doesn't have a proper second person plural pronoun.  You as a plural and a singular doesn't cut it, "you guys" is gendered -- y'all/all y'all it is. 

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Because English doesn't have a noticable plural for "you", European immigrants made their own version: yous or youse (as in youse guys). Well, that's my theory and I'm stickin' to it.

I was once "outed" as a New Yorker when I lived in NC because I said wawder.  I've got a big white mug on the kitchen counter on which I wrote Cawfee (saw it once online and loved it).

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57 minutes ago, Bastet said:

Y'all (or all y'all, which is my preferred version, especially in uses like "fuck all y'all") is a wonderful addition to a language that doesn't have a proper second person plural pronoun.  You as a plural and a singular doesn't cut it, "you guys" is gendered -- y'all/all y'all it is. 

Ah-ha! Once again @Bastet has clarified for me why things just seem right to me.🤩
I shall now use "all y'all" with greater confidence. 😎
And hopefully if someone questions it, I won't screw up the explanation too badly.
Or my long story will cause them to change the subject. ;)

 

32 minutes ago, Lady Whistleup said:

As someone severely allergic to most flowers I guess my pet peeve is also events where there are a lot of flowers. 

Same here, and perfumes! 
Can we just agree to stay 6 feet apart forever from most people?

Lilies are the worst. Beautiful but so strong smelling! Understandable why they used them at funerals and wakes.

Roses are okay for me.

[small voice] I wouldn't mind being invited to a color-themed wedding.
My wedding was ad hoc with church-going men donating dress pants and jacket to my ex. They did not match. Chekhovian mismatch. 

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26 minutes ago, annzeepark914 said:

Because English doesn't have a noticable plural for "you", European immigrants made their own version: yous or youse (as in youse guys). Well, that's my theory and I'm stickin' to it.

I was once "outed" as a New Yorker when I lived in NC because I said wawder.  I've got a big white mug on the kitchen counter on which I wrote Cawfee (saw it once online and loved it).

My family is all from Western PA. My Uncle was "Dwan" (Don) and my cousin was "Dwan" Ann (Dawn Ann). They had expressions like "Red up your room" and "Throw mama from the train a kiss". They all moved out to Seattle a few years after my parents did but the accents stayed.

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9 hours ago, Hangin Out said:

I grew up in Ozone Park Queens too.  Got married and moved to Long Island.  Whenever I go out of state, everyone knows where I’m from by the N.Y. Accent.  I remember the Beatles also, watching with my friends on a small t.v.  Were you ever at Forest Park and Victory Field?  Sooo long ago.  I never lost my accent. Lol

My high school graduation was in Forest Park!  Jamaica High School. Class of 72. 

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12 minutes ago, icemiser69 said:

I was talking to someone, and was told that every so often when I talk, I have a "tone".  In other words, "copping an attitude".   I have never really noticed it, and would love to stop doing that, but have no clue how to make that change.  I can't hear myself when I talk.

I have also noticed something similar every so often when I post.  I type something thinking it is going to land one way, and it totally lands in a way that wasn't intended.

I know I am socially awkward, but still it is a quirk that I have that really annoys me.

I have a variation on that tendency myself. I'm pretty old and still dealing with it, but, hey, at least we are acknowledging it rather than making excuses. That's better than nothing. 💟

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3 hours ago, peacheslatour said:

They had expressions like "Red up your room"

What does that mean?

20 minutes ago, icemiser69 said:

I was talking to someone, and was told that every so often when I talk, I have a "tone".  In other words, "copping an attitude".   I have never really noticed it, and would love to stop doing that, but have no clue how to make that change.  I can't hear myself when I talk.

I have also noticed something similar every so often when I post.  I type something thinking it is going to land one way, and it totally lands in a way that wasn't intended.

If it's just one person thinking that, I wouldn't worry about it.

And writing in a way that gets everything across is difficult for many people. That happens to many. I blame a lot of conflict and stupid arguments on the internet for that.

Writing isn't speaking. A lot is lost.

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(edited)
42 minutes ago, supposebly said:

What does that mean?

Clean up your room. It’s actually shortened from, readying, or redding up your room.

Edited by ginger90
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2 hours ago, supposebly said:

…And writing in a way that gets everything across is difficult for many people. That happens to many. I blame a lot of conflict and stupid arguments on the internet for that.

Writing isn't speaking. A lot is lost

Yes. Exactly. 
Two things I’ve tried changing when communicating electronically (posting on boards, texting, email, tweeting, etc.) are:

  1. Whenever possible, replace pronouns with more specific nouns, like use “Jane” instead of “she” or “her” to help readers know to whom you are referring.   
     
  2. Avoid using sarcasm. It is very difficult to express sarcasm without facial expressions and tone of voice. Readers will by default assume what they are reading is straightforward rather than a joke.

But still sometimes I am clearly writing A, but some will assume I was going to say B and reply as if I did say B.

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14 hours ago, GussieK said:

My high school graduation was in Forest Park!  Jamaica High School. Class of 72. 

Richmond Hill HS and Valencia Theatre for graduation.  Forest Park for snow sledding and ice skating and concerts.

 

 

 

 

 

 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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On 6/18/2021 at 10:22 AM, annzeepark914 said:

Now, to me the first pronunciation of "can" sounds right so that's thanks to my Mid-Hudson twang background. If I try to pronounce "can" the second way, it sounds affected to me.

I just now realized that I say "can" (as in "can of beer") differently than I say "can" (as in "can I have a beer?").

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29 minutes ago, TattleTeeny said:

I just now realized that I say "can" (as in "can of beer") differently than I say "can" (as in "can I have a beer?").

Yup.  It's weird but I pronounced the same word slightly differently too.

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I'm somewhat used to younger folks not being clued into noteworthy people and events  from even the lattter part of  20th century but the other day I was in a produce department and mentioned something about Y2K to a 20-something produce attendant- and I wound up having to explain what Y2K had been!  This person would have been roughly in grade school at the time it happened so I'm wondering how they could have not only missed the hype but also how their own parents, teachers and peers never seemed to have brought it up to them in the last 20 years!  Are people going to have to Google how manual typewriters and rotary telephones worked in the near future? It seems a bit much! 

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2 hours ago, Blergh said:

mentioned something about Y2K to a 20-something produce attendant- and I wound up having to explain what Y2K had been!  This person would have been roughly in grade school at the time it happened so I'm wondering how they could have not only missed the hype but also how their own parents, teachers and peers never seemed to have brought it up to them in the last 20 years! 

I vaguely recall mentioning Y2K to someone in that age group recently (maybe a shoe store employee?) and getting the same blank stare.
So it's not just a one-off.

Much of the Chicken Little (The sky is falling! The sky is falling!) hype leading up to Y2K didn't come to pass, so there was nothing to keep talking about --largely because there was adequate cooperation across technological entities leading up to the event (wikipedia.org/wiki/Year_2000_problem#On_1_January_2000). 
I know, young Grasshoppers, cooperation seems like a fantasy now.
Perhaps too with 2000 being an election year, Y2K was eclipsed by those shenanigans --about which we must not say more on this platform --which is a good thing, I think.

It's also possible that your produce clerk's family (and my shoe store employee's family) didn't own or work with computers at that time
--and/or there was a divorce or death or fire or other catastrophe at that time causing Y2K to drop off the radar of concerns for those youngsters at the time
--and/or there was an attractive classmate seated nearby who consumed most thoughts.

 

 

Edited by shapeshifter
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I feel like I can’t fault people for not knowing something that happened when they were young kids. For instance, I was a a baby when Richard Nixon was impeached. I don’t recall being taught much about it in school and the only info I now know is due to my adult self learning about it. Even today, there are things I have no clue about, but seem to be “big” deals to other people, and vice versa. One can only know about something if they know there is something to know about in the first place (if that makes any sense, haha!).

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1 hour ago, Blergh said:

I'm somewhat used to younger folks not being clued into noteworthy people and events  from even the lattter part of  20th century but the other day I was in a produce department and mentioned something about Y2K to a 20-something produce attendant- and I wound up having to explain what Y2K had been! 

I was an adult in 1999/2000 and my husband worked in IT but even so for a second or two after I started reading your post I was blanking out on what Y2K meant!  I agree with @shapeshifter that it was a big deal that basically fizzled out into a nothing deal by 12.01 am on the Jan 1, 2000!  

1 hour ago, Blergh said:

Are people going to have to Google how manual typewriters and rotary telephones worked in the near future?

I took my grandchildren to the Science and Technology Museum in the before pandemic times and they were fascinated by the display of "ancient" telephones.  They had never seen a rotary phone before and had no idea how it worked.  Their reaction was similar to mine at the same age when I first came across an old style crank phone.

 

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24 minutes ago, TattleTeeny said:

I feel like I can’t fault people for not knowing something that happened when they were young kids. For instance, I was a a baby when Richard Nixon was impeached. I don’t recall being taught much about it in school and the only info I now know is due to my adult self learning about it. Even today, there are things I have no clue about, but seem to be “big” deals to other people, and vice versa. One can only know about something if they know there is something to know about in the first place (if that makes any sense, haha!).

Richard Nixon was never impeached.

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1 hour ago, TattleTeeny said:

I feel like I can’t fault people for not knowing something that happened when they were young kids. For instance, I was a a baby when Richard Nixon was impeached. I don’t recall being taught much about it in school and the only info I now know is due to my adult self learning about it. Even today, there are things I have no clue about, but seem to be “big” deals to other people, and vice versa. One can only know about something if they know there is something to know about in the first place (if that makes any sense, haha!).

I on the other hand watch marathons pop culture and other history shows and think.... WTF I remember that.  That didn't happen before I was born, was an infant, etc.  Then I become very confused.  Then I think maybe I'm remembering TV shows about history as if I lived them.  But the thing is, I had a pet rock.  I remember the pet rock craze.  I'm pretty sure that is not a fad that lasted a decade.

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(edited)
1 hour ago, peacheslatour said:

Richard Nixon was never impeached.

Sorry—just meant his whole drama that I was never specifically taught. Considered for impeachment? Accused of impeachable offenses (impeachable moments, haha!).

Edited by TattleTeeny
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I remember many years ago, watching some documentary series (so a real person, not a scripted character), and a teenager was told to look something up in the phone book, and he was utterly befuddled, even once handed a phone book that he looked through.

I understand having never used one if you grew up when looking things up online was always an easy option, but a) this was back when the phone book was delivered to your doorstep, so it's not a foreign object (what a lack of curiosity to have never asked, "What's this for?"), and, more importantly, b) if someone hands you a book, says look [it] up in there, and you flip through and see alphabetized listings, shouldn't you clue in to how you might find [it] within?

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3 minutes ago, Bastet said:

I remember many years ago, watching some documentary series (so a real person, not a scripted character), and a teenager was told to look something up in the phone book, and he was utterly befuddled, even once handed a phone book that he looked through.

I understand having never used one if you grew up when looking things up online was always an easy option, but a) this was back when the phone book was delivered to your doorstep, so it's not a foreign object (what a lack of curiosity to have never asked, "What's this for?"), and, more importantly, b) if someone hands you a book, says look [it] up in there, and you flip through and see alphabetized listings, shouldn't you clue in to how you might find [it] within?

Some people have no intellectual curiosity. Like, at all.

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30 minutes ago, peacheslatour said:

That's awful. They really should at least go back to teaching Civics in this country.

I know from experience, that many teachers have the best of intentions when it comes to covering recent history, but life gets in the way.  They plan out the whole course and expect to talk about everything, but between snow days and the teacher getting sick for 4 days and some really intense discussions about the 1930s and the Holocaust, etc. things get rushed.  Teachers then have to cram 2 decades worth of material into one week of classes.  

My undergraduate degree was in history and one semester I took a class on the French Revolution.  The professor got so into discussing all the stuff we needed before 1789 that we never got to the French Revolution.  

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2 minutes ago, RealHousewife said:

When you get takeout and they forget something. I know stuff happens, but it is annoying. I had it happen the last three times I got takeout. 

All from the same place? If so, it might time for a talk with the management. #nokaren

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5 minutes ago, Ohiopirate02 said:

I know from experience, that many teachers have the best of intentions when it comes to covering recent history, but life gets in the way.  They plan out the whole course and expect to talk about everything, but between snow days and the teacher getting sick for 4 days and some really intense discussions about the 1930s and the Holocaust, etc. things get rushed.  Teachers then have to cram 2 decades worth of material into one week of classes.  

My undergraduate degree was in history and one semester I took a class on the French Revolution.  The professor got so into discussing all the stuff we needed before 1789 that we never got to the French Revolution.  

My degree is in History too - I took a semester course on the events in Europe in from the 16th to 19th centuries and managed to learn all about the French Revolution.  Alas, these many years later I don’t remember much.  I still have the books though.  
My Junior and Senior years in High School had a pretty good structure regarding what would be covered in History class - we had trimesters and at the end of each one we moved on to another teacher plus could be with a different group of students from our respective grades.  So for History the first trimester covered a specified time period, the second after that and the third the next time period.  We managed to make it to the 20th century.  

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4 minutes ago, peacheslatour said:

All from the same place? If so, it might time for a talk with the management. #nokaren

lol! No, they were from different places. It's just annoying that I had bad lack three times in a row. 

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13 minutes ago, RealHousewife said:

lol! No, they were from different places. It's just annoying that I had bad lack three times in a row. 

We actually did order from the same place 3 or 4 times  over the course of a month or two even though each time they managed to mess up something.  We wanted to be good about helping keep local businesses going during the pandemic.  But honestly the more they screwed up the more it seemed like we cared more about them staying in business than they did!

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(edited)
7 hours ago, WinnieWinkle said:

I was an adult in 1999/2000 and my husband worked in IT but even so for a second or two after I started reading your post I was blanking out on what Y2K meant!  I agree with @shapeshifter that it was a big deal that basically fizzled out into a nothing deal by 12.01 am on the Jan 1, 2000!  

I took my grandchildren to the Science and Technology Museum in the before pandemic times and they were fascinated by the display of "ancient" telephones.  They had never seen a rotary phone before and had no idea how it worked.  Their reaction was similar to mine at the same age when I first came across an old style crank phone.

 

I worked a 2nd job in a department store for about 5 yrs during the recession which began in 2008-ish.  We were selling an all-in-one stereo unit which had a turntable, CD player, cassette tape, etc., and the boss brought in some of his albums to use for demo purposes (no, I wouldn't have either).  Anyway, I had a 20 or 21-yr old co-worker whom I dispatched to set up the unit and get the album going on the turntable.  He came back about 10 minutes later with a sheepish look on his face, and humbly said to me "I don't know how that works.  I can't figure it out."  I had just turned 50 not long before that, and that moment sort of defined my transition to I'm not one of them anymore.  

Edited by SuprSuprElevated
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(edited)

We are having cable problems, at least on the TVs that have on demand stuff on it. I just have an older cable box on my TV (no on demand stuff) so it works fine. Our phone and internet are still okay; when we called xfinity, they said it was an outage, but we are apparently the only one in our street with this issue. They said it will be fixed by tomorrow morning, but we’re still pretty pissed off, especially since it cut off right when my mom was watching a free HBO movie and it seems we won’t get it back in time before our free weekend runs out.

Edited by Spartan Girl
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7 minutes ago, Spartan Girl said:

xfinity, they said it was an outage, but we are apparently the only one in our street with this issue. They said it will be fixed by tomorrow morning, but we’re still pretty pissed off, especially since it cut off right when my mom was watching a feee HBO movie and it seems we won’t get it back in time before our free weekend runs out.

My first instinct is to rant to Xfinity about it so they either give you some bonus stuff or a rebate to cover the cost of the missed show. Once I've started asking for justice for my 1st World Problem, there's no stopping me, heh. 
In contrast, my middle daughter doesn't ever return anything to a store for any reason, even though she really can't afford not to.

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14 minutes ago, shapeshifter said:

My first instinct is to rant to Xfinity about it so they either give you some bonus stuff or a rebate to cover the cost of the missed show. Once I've started asking for justice for my 1st World Problem, there's no stopping me, heh. 
In contrast, my middle daughter doesn't ever return anything to a store for any reason, even though she really can't afford not to.

They said they’d give us $22 of credit on our bill. It would be nice if they extended our HBO free weekend but I doubt they’d do it. I just hope we get it back at all.

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25 minutes ago, Spartan Girl said:

We are having cable problems, at least on the TVs that have on demand stuff on it. I just have an older cable box on my TV (no on demand stuff) so it works fine. Our phone and internet are still okay; when we called xfinity, they said it was an outage, but we are apparently the only one in our street with this issue. They said it will be fixed by tomorrow morning, but we’re still pretty pissed off, especially since it cut off right when my mom was watching a feee HBO movie and it seems we won’t get it back in time before our free weekend runs out.

Since there should be a time record of both the movie and your complaint call(s), I would definitely make a play with Comcast to try and get at most, another free weekend (or day) of HBO, or at least, a free viewing of the movie she was viewing.

You'll get neither if you don't ask.

p.s.:  I despise Comcast.

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7 hours ago, TattleTeeny said:

Yeah, I feel like all of the history we had in school was waaaaay in the past stuff, not more recent events.

Ever run into someone who doesn't know what 9/11 is?

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7 hours ago, Ohiopirate02 said:

I know from experience, that many teachers have the best of intentions when it comes to covering recent history, but life gets in the way.  They plan out the whole course and expect to talk about everything, but between snow days and the teacher getting sick for 4 days and some really intense discussions about the 1930s and the Holocaust, etc. things get rushed.  Teachers then have to cram 2 decades worth of material into one week of classes.  

My undergraduate degree was in history and one semester I took a class on the French Revolution.  The professor got so into discussing all the stuff we needed before 1789 that we never got to the French Revolution.  

7 hours ago, Cobb Salad said:

My degree is in History too - I took a semester course on the events in Europe in from the 16th to 19th centuries and managed to learn all about the French Revolution.  Alas, these many years later I don’t remember much.  I still have the books though.  
My Junior and Senior years in High School had a pretty good structure regarding what would be covered in History class - we had trimesters and at the end of each one we moved on to another teacher plus could be with a different group of students from our respective grades.  So for History the first trimester covered a specified time period, the second after that and the third the next time period.  We managed to make it to the 20th century.  

A Sociology professor told us that history couldn't be accurately taught until it was at least 20 years after the events. This could explain why young adults who are now out of school wouldn't necessarily be familiar with events that occurred about 20 years ago.

 

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1 hour ago, SuprSuprElevated said:

Since there should be a time record of both the movie and your complaint call(s), I would definitely make a play with Comcast to try and get at most, another free weekend (or day) of HBO, or at least, a free viewing of the movie she was viewing.

You'll get neither if you don't ask.

p.s.:  I despise Comcast.

Got our cable back just in time for Mom to resume the movie for free! Thanks for the support, everyone! First world problems are still a pain in the ass lol.

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When Paul Newman died, a young co-worker of mine (about 28 at the time) said, "Oh, the salad dressing guy died?"  Not one of only four actors to be nominated for an Academy Award in five different decades, which speaks to his longevity and the quality of his work, but the salad dressing guy!  She had no clue about his work as an actor.  I felt sooooo old.  

Another peeve about circumstances making me feel old:  recently my small Corningware casserole dish slipped out of my hand when I was taking it out of the cupboard and smashed into many, many pieces.  I tried to order a replacement only to discover that my pattern is now considered vintage.  Damn, I really am getting old.  

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12 minutes ago, TattleTeeny said:

Not so far, but I will ask my friend’s new baby and report back, haha! 

Maybe in 20+ years your friend's baby will be writing a college thesis paper on 9/11. 😉

And now I have once again revealed my true colors of being that annoying person that is the subject of a pet peeve. 

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I remember talking to my husband in front of our sixteen year old babysitter about some movie or other and it turned out she'd never heard of Clark Gable, Marilyn Monroe, James Dean or anyone who wasn't in tv show on Friday nights in the eighties.

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