S09.E13: Jill's Wedding

[JerseyGirl]

Nothing wrong with seeing each other before the wedding

 

Nothing wrong but I didn't like her reasoning.  She said something about being worried about not seeing him all day - as if he was going to be a no show the day of the wedding???

 

And for them, seeing each other right before the wedding and not being able to kiss just took something away from this intimate moment.

[Darknight]

Josh's hissy fits baffle me. You were the groom, Einstein. It was Anna's family who threw YOUR wedding. If you didn't like how it went down, take it up with Pa Keller. And then get over it!

What the heck is a covenant marriage? I've never heard of it.

Josh is just an ungrateful bitch

[Darknight]

Couldn't Michelle get a decent hairstyle.

[GEML]

I think you either find young children fun at a wedding or you don't. I've always liked them, so Josie didn't bother me, and MacKynzie didn't bother me at Priscilla's wedding a few years ago either. Of course, that would have been my daughter running aroynd a wedding party this summer, but that was payback for her brother running at mine....

It's a choice, and there isn't a right or wrong one. I understand either side, but I laughed at the antics at my own wedding so I can't fault JB and Michelle for cracking up here.

Edited October 29, 2014 by GEML

[Skittl1321]

I've never heard of "first look".  Has anyone else?

 

I read a Disney forum, and the Disney brides are ALWAYS talking about "first look". It's just a way to get better photos of the groom seeing the bride for the first time.

[mimionthebeach]

I hate to say it, but I don't think Jill is Derick's first.

There have been allusions to that. In one of the People articles it was stated that this was all a first for Jill, but it avoided saying anything about Derick's past or purity. I've always assumed that Derick's only firsts here were all the freaking rules and chaperones.

[riverblue22]

What bothers me is that they are too good for this church when it comes to worshipping, but when they need it for their own purposes, they show up.  I wonder if a lot of those "volunteers" are church members who may not even know the Duggars.  What do the Duggars give back to this church?

 

I agree that it was a skimpy reception but I'm not too worried about guests who travelled from California, or wherever.  They would be cult members,  invited to the real bash at the house afterward.

 

Do you think Derrickdillard and Jill spent their first night in their new home?  That would be so much better than a hotel.  And when they got back from the honeymoon, they came back to a fully equipped home.

[Skittl1321]

I think it really isn't special. People can still divorce.

 

They can still divorce, but it needs to be for a reason like abuse, adultery, or one spouse committing a felony. It can't be just because they got tired of each other, or had different life goals that made them grow apart. A covenant marriage is different from a standard marriage license.

 

Here is the related Arkansas law ftp://www.arkleg.state.ar.us/acts/2001/htm/ACT1486.pdf

(2 other states, Arizona and Louisiana have their own covenant marriage laws.)

Edited October 29, 2014 by Skittl1321

[Betweenyouandme]

I agree with most all the criticisms about the wedding. To be blunt, it was a cheap spectacle. Mostly due to the style of the kiss, bare feet, kissing in the aisle while wearing sunglasses, and everyone running out. It would have made more sense if it was on a farm outdoors. Then, it would have been fine. But, it lokked like they wanted attention for the camera rather than respecting a holy marriage in a church.

What I would like to know is after Jill licked Derick's finger, was he grossed out as he rubbed his fingers together or was he trying to feel it? He paused strangely after she did it while rubbing his wet fingers together. (Though, it seems pausing is just what he does).

Edited October 29, 2014 by Betweenyouandme

[Jellybeans]

I must have seen a different wedding.

I enjoyed seeing the re-enactment, thought it was sweet- I come from a very small family so something like that would definitely touch me. Jim Bob was very emotional about his daughter getting married. Wish I had seen some emotion from my own Dad.

Saw nothing wrong with their kiss. It was their first, on TV!

And, the ice cream was re-scooped. They had other food other than root beer floats and popcorn. Saw cookies, cupcakes, sodas, and no one had empty hands.

Thought the running down the aisle was a fun surprise, and Josh kissing Anna was fine. She is his wife and emotion is running high... why not smooch? Doesn't anyone ever kiss their own spouse or s/o at a wedding?

Bare feet beats painful high heels any day. She is the Bride, who cares if she did not wear shoes. It was not noticeable for the most part. Yeah, yeah she "could have" worn ballerina slippers but she decided not to. So what. How does it hurt anyone? She did not step on a nail.

Did not expect the little ones to "behave" at the stage since they are mere children so I was laughing at their antics.

I am not religious, but was touched they do daily devotions together. Loved they discarded tradition and spent the day together. Hope more couples do this.

I think Jill and Derrick are well suited for each other from what little I see of them on TV.

[Kellyee]

Jill's wedding dress was really pretty. They seem genuinely fond of each and attracted to each other, although I wouldn't say they are in love because I don't think they've had any private time together to really get to know each other on a deeper level. I wish they had waited longer to get to know each other before getting pregnant, but they seem a lot more genuine than Jessa and Ben.

 

Having that many people involved in and attending the wedding was silly though. I've been to huge weddings before, where everyone you ever met is invited. I'm wondering if that was Jill and Derrick's idea, or if they were informed by Jim Bob how it was going to be.

[parisprincess]

All of the guests deserved better than that crappy reception. Cupcakes, ice cream, and popcorn at a wedding hosted by millionaires who have their own tv show? Insulting. If they weren't willing to spring for a simple buffet of pasta and salad to feed their guests, they shouldn't have invited so many. It was pathetic watching people sitting on curbs or park benches outside on the pavement. The Duggars not only didn't feed their guests, they made no effort to make them comfortable.

 

I can't believe, if there were a thousand guests, that JB or Michelle could greet each of them by name.  I've read that, in fundie weddings, there's an open invitation to everyone and their brother, so I'll bet that half of the attendees don't even know the Duggars on a personal basis.  Therefore, it doesn't bother me that all they got for showing up was popcorn and root beer floats. 

[Zanzibar]

As a Catholic it is strange to see an altar with no crucifix on it, just the white drapery. Looked like a stage but not a church, unless I missed it. (Not trying to be judgy- that's fine if that's what their churches look like).

 

 

I thought I heard Jim Bob say that he and Michelle were married "over there" (referring to the sanctuary) and then mentioned that Jill was getting married in the auditorium.  That's why it was a stage and not an altar.

 

As for Erin Bates, they showed her playing piano as they went to a commercial right before the wedding started, and that music sounded pretty.  The piano playing during the ceremony, though... not so much.

[phoenix62]

My snarktastic daughter walked in as the "volunteer" meeting was going on and she was dumbfounded. She said. "Are there really that many people who want to help or do they just want ringside seats when the circus comes to town?"

 

I don't doubt that DerrickDillard is into Jill. I do think that he was probably experiencing that letdown that happens when you've just dealt with a big emotional moment and have to regroup for another....plus I'm sure he was anxious to whisk her away from the Compound-Church Annex and have a few moments of peace. True peace is something he was probably sorely lacking during the whole courtship process. I almost thought he was going to drag her all the way out to the truck when they fled the ceremony.

 

Erin Bates was attacking that piano like JD and Josh attack Jello salad at a fellowship picnic.

 

The both the bride's and the smother of the bride's gowns were hideous. There are so many shops that specialize in modest yet chic gowns, there's truly no excuse.

 

I don't get the need for bare feet but it's her wedding and if she wasn't a bridezilla in the face of the Mullet That Ate Arkansas, I can't really summon up much ire.

 

It is gross that JimBob and Michelle kept making it about themselves and their 30 year old memories back when they were defrauding left and right,

 

It freaks me out how much Joy and Jana look alike and it looks like most of the little girls resemble those two. Jill and Jessa resemble each other and I have no idea who Jinger looks like,

I think Joy and Jana are the most attractive of the young women, and my heart breaks for them. I hope someday they escape the madness that is the Gothard cult.

I can't help but think the youngest...Josie?-needs at LEAST speech therapy. My son spoke like her, I couldn't understand him. He received speech therapy until he was in second grade...he speaks fine, now...you'd never know he had trouble when he was young. However, Josie has a natural talent for singing, if they do anything for that girl..get her some professional singing lessons! (Then again, perhaps not....they might turn her into the cash cow down the road when TLC gets bored with them and cancels the TV contract)..,

I confess that the episode bored the crap out of me. It didn't take me much time to down my glass of wine, and I fell asleep around the time they messed up the root beer floats (what on earth were they thinking...why not scoop the ice cream, poor the root beer one at a time, considering all the people there helping). I will try to finish watching the rest on Amazon prime later...yes, I'm a idiot, I paid for the season.

[Betweenyouandme]

I thought I heard Jim Bob say that he and Michelle were married "over there" (referring to the sanctuary) and then mentioned that Jill was getting married in the auditorium. That's why it was a stage and not an altar.

h.

No, that's incorrect. Jim and Michelle got remarried at the same spot where they had been married. It had been turned into a hallway and reception desk. The new sanctuary is where Jill was married. It's a very modern church in style.

[parisprincess]

Thought the running down the aisle was a fun surprise, and Josh kissing Anna was fine. She is his wife and emotion is running high... why not smooch? Doesn't anyone ever kiss their own spouse or s/o at a wedding?

 

Why I didn't like Josh's little stunt is because this was Jill and Derick's day and Josh, who obviously takes after both of his parents, had to draw attention to himself.  He did the same thing at the Bates wedding that he and Anna were a part of.  The couples were walking back up the aisle and he had to stop and dip Anna and plant a big one on her. 

[phoenix62]

I was married twice...(widowed once, separated from #2). Both marriages were with a justice of the peace. The cost was minimal, took about 20 minutes of our time at most. There is no way in hell I would go through a wedding...I could never see myself go through all that craziness...even a small wedding. I'd be scared to death. So...kudos to Jill and Derrick for even going through that dog and pony show.

That being said, my boyfriend was livid that they didn't even try to either postpone the wedding until Derrick's mother was doing better, or just having a simple wedding so she would be able to enjoy seeing her son getting married. I didn't see the episode, I fell asleep...did Derrick's mother come to the wedding?

[mimionthebeach]

I hadn't noticed the interrupting before honestly, until I read the comments.  But after that - wow, you weren't kidding!  In one of the final THs, Jill interrupted Derick literally every few words.  And talked over everything he said.  Yeah he probably thinks it's cute now, but it'll make things awkward in social settings when they "fellowship" with other couples in the future.  *cringe*

 

I just had a vision of the older girls, without Jill, looking at each other awkwardly as the ends of all their sentences hang unspoken in the air around them.

[joanofarch4]

Not that I've ever been the biggest fan of St. Jill, but wow...  It really was "All About Her" last night, wasn't it?  "Look at me, it's my big day, I can't wait for Derick Dillard to see me in my dress" (when he told her how beautiful she looked, I at least expected a "you look nice, too," but I think we got some variation of "ohhh, how sweet (of course I'm beautiful, it's my big day)"...  Full of herself much?

 

And really?  Such a touching (long and slightly skeevy) father/daughter scene before the ceremony, but Derick couldn't have a single minute alone with what appears to be, although I hope I'm wrong, his dying mother before becoming a Duggar and leaving for at least one week (hope his Mom didn't catch any germs from those 300 people, including about 25 children who appear always to have some kind of bug)?  No chance of that; Jilly Muffin had to crash through the door along with him, calling her "Mom" and grinning from ear to ear about her big day!  That really struck me as very insensitive, and I felt very sorry for Derick, Kathy, Dan, and the stepdad, who I don't think cracked a smile the whole day.  Imagine what that family must be going through!  

 

JB seems more in love with Jill than with his wife; just sayin'!

 

I did get a kick out of all the stricken faces on the altar (Joyless, Jana, and Dan all looked tragic), and whose bright idea was it to plop a half-dozen hyperactive children directly at the foot of the ceremony?  Oh, Jill's.  Not to mention in front of immunocompromised Kathy.

 

Good luck getting any work done, Derick (Jill to Jackson: "Deliver."), and I hope you use some of that family medical leave to spend a little quality alone time with your mother and brother before it's too late.

Edited October 29, 2014 by joanofarch4

[WTFFF]

My family sucks. I've never once had a family member walk through the room and make a perfectly timed, witty comment about a show I'm watching like so many people here do.

My family isn't doing their jobs!

Do what I do and make your loved ones watch the show with you. 

 

I'm not even kidding when I say this: this is how I met my fiancee.  We were casual friends, and I made her start watching 19KaC so I'd have someone to talk about it with.  (Though she genuinely likes them sometimes, which I will never understand, but she's nicer than I am.)  Well, we talked about it so damn much we ended up talking about everything, and we've been together four years come January.

 

So the Duggars are actually responsible for getting two girls together.  I should write them a letter and tell them!

Edited October 29, 2014 by WTFFF

[Higgins]

I was married twice...(widowed once, separated from #2). Both marriages were with a justice of the peace. The cost was minimal, took about 20 minutes of our time at most. There is no way in hell I would go through a wedding...I could never see myself go through all that craziness...even a small wedding. I'd be scared to death. So...kudos to Jill and Derrick for even going through that dog and pony show.

That being said, my boyfriend was livid that they didn't even try to either postpone the wedding until Derrick's mother was doing better, or just having a simple wedding so she would be able to enjoy seeing her son getting married. I didn't see the episode, I fell asleep...did Derrick's mother come to the wedding?

Could it be possible that she didn't want them to postpone the wedding? If I were her I would insist that they get married as planned.

[barbedwire]

Like riverblue22 said, I too hope that tightwad JimBoob threw some money at the church, or, even better, the church charged them for the use of the facility since they are not members.  Way too many "volunteers" wanting to watch this circus.

 

And thanks everyone for the recap.  I happily was watching the World Series last night.  GO ROYALS!

[ghoulina]

Okay, that show alternately bored me and made me roll my eyes. I am just glad it's over. An entire season of Jill's wedding was 8 episodes too many. Personally, I was not impressed with that wedding and I would not have wanted it televised. I actually kind of like the idea of her theme - the vintage, shabby chic thing. I liked the colors she chose, and I thought her dress was very pretty. One thing I thought was really cute - the chalkboards before and after the ceremony.

 

Some real cute ideas there. But it did not fit, at all, with the venue. It would have been much cuter if they did it outside, or in an old barn. There are so many cool locations they could have used that would have fit better with the theme. But standing up in that bland, impersonal megachurch, with the outdated carpet - it just looked tacky as hell. Just a horrible fit. And the running down the aisle? Ack, I cringed with embarrassment. 

 

And what was with the cutting of the cake just randomly being outside, on the sidewalk? Don't they have a room inside for the reception? The whole thing just came off super cheap, and I'm about sick of hearing how they "save" on this and "save" on that. It's great to be wise with money, I'm pretty damn frugal myself. But it's okay to splurge sometimes. Clearly they don't know how to be cheap without showing it. I have three younger sisters and the middle one really did not have a big wedding budget. But her wedding was still just so classy. She did a lot of swapping with people for services (she's a graphic designer) and made a lot of stuff herself. But nothing looked thrown together or out of place. Ugh, it just annoys me that they get paid to televise this crap, but JB can't even pony up to make the wedding nicer. Instead, they have the 3489385048 dwarves slaving away for them. It was uncomfortable to watch. 

 

Not to be rude, but HD does not do these girls any favors. They have bad hair and bad skin. Hey, my hair is pretty frazzled itself and my skin isn't perfect, but I'm not on TV. All of those older girls need a cut and some deep conditioning. And they need to stop packing on the makeup, because it's just going to make them breakout even more. Jill actually seems to be the one girl who doesn't cake it on. 

 

I noticed Joy was with Jill a lot during the prep, and she just seemed so sad. And poor Jordyn. She was devastated. I do feel for those younger kids, because Jill was definitely an amazing mom to them. But I'm happy for her that she finally gets to get out of there. 

 

So creepy how EVERYONE, even the little kids, were hoping she'd have a baby soon. JB seemed like he wanted to be in the bedroom giving Derick tips. 

[mimionthebeach]

Also, did anyone notice Jim Bob literally leading Ben around by his tie?

He may as well get used to it. Jessa will be leading him around by something else soon enough.

[barbedwire]

LOL!  Indeed.

[mimionthebeach]

Who thought those little girls would be able to sit on those steps through the whole ceremony going on BEHIND them? Granted Jenny was probably just frozen in fear at being in front of such a huge crowd. But I can't blame Mac and Josie for getting restless. They are 5. Maybe Josie's a bit delayed but 5 year-olds aren't going to sit still under those circumstances. That they couldn't do it (I noticed in one of the shots from the balcony, the girls had gone) is not their fault, but poor planning on Jill's part.

[Darknight]

They can still divorce, but it needs to be for a reason like abuse, adultery, or one spouse committing a felony. It can't be just because they got tired of each other, or had different life goals that made them grow apart. A covenant marriage is different from a standard marriage license.

Here is the related Arkansas law ftp://www.arkleg.state.ar.us/acts/2001/htm/ACT1486.pdf

(2 other states, Arizona and Louisiana have their own covenant marriage laws.)

But still what's the difference between the two? Divorce is divorce. The only thing I see with the covenant marriage is the couple attend counseling, hopefully a real therapist

[joanofarch4]

I haven't read all the comments yet, so I hope I'm not repeating, but...  "Mummy" of the bride???  Definitely revenge of the J-slaves.

 

And that was Erin Bates beating the living daylights out of that piano...  Something definitely went wrong between these two families at some point (perhaps when no Bates boy ever proposed to any Duggar daughter as I'm sure was expected back in the heyday of their "fellowship").

Edited October 29, 2014 by joanofarch4

[Darknight]

Okay, that show alternately bored me and made me roll my eyes. I am just glad it's over. An entire season of Jill's wedding was 8 episodes too many. Personally, I was not impressed with that wedding and I would not have wanted it televised. I actually kind of like the idea of her theme - the vintage, shabby chic thing. I liked the colors she chose, and I thought her dress was very pretty. One thing I thought was really cute - the chalkboards before and after the ceremony.

Some real cute ideas there. But it did not fit, at all, with the venue. It would have been much cuter if they did it outside, or in an old barn. There are so many cool locations they could have used that would have fit better with the theme. But standing up in that bland, impersonal megachurch, with the outdated carpet - it just looked tacky as hell. Just a horrible fit. And the running down the aisle? Ack, I cringed with embarrassment.

And what was with the cutting of the cake just randomly being outside, on the sidewalk? Don't they have a room inside for the reception? The whole thing just came off super cheap, and I'm about sick of hearing how they "save" on this and "save" on that. It's great to be wise with money, I'm pretty damn frugal myself. But it's okay to splurge sometimes. Clearly they don't know how to be cheap without showing it. I have three younger sisters and the middle one really did not have a big wedding budget. But her wedding was still just so classy. She did a lot of swapping with people for services (she's a graphic designer) and made a lot of stuff herself. But nothing looked thrown together or out of place. Ugh, it just annoys me that they get paid to televise this crap, but JB can't even pony up to make the wedding nicer. Instead, they have the 3489385048 dwarves slaving away for them. It was uncomfortable to watch.

Not to be rude, but HD does not do these girls any favors. They have bad hair and bad skin. Hey, my hair is pretty frazzled itself and my skin isn't perfect, but I'm not on TV. All of those older girls need a cut and some deep conditioning. And they need to stop packing on the makeup, because it's just going to make them breakout even more. Jill actually seems to be the one girl who doesn't cake it on.

I noticed Joy was with Jill a lot during the prep, and she just seemed so sad. And poor Jordyn. She was devastated. I do feel for those younger kids, because Jill was definitely an amazing mom to them. But I'm happy for her that she finally gets to get out of there.

So creepy how EVERYONE, even the little kids, were hoping she'd have a baby soon. JB seemed like he wanted to be in the bedroom giving Derick tips.

Jordyn is Jessa's buddy. And these people are so damn cheap. Josh's wedding was better than this

There have been allusions to that. In one of the People articles it was stated that this was all a first for Jill, but it avoided saying anything about Derick's past or purity. I've always assumed that Derick's only firsts here were all the freaking rules and chaperones.

Derick's lips aren't pure

[joanofarch4]

I'm so cynical that I almost wondered if Jordyn wasn't crying about something else entirely and they jumped on it to make it appear to be "All About Jill."  Jim Bob was kind of suggesting to her that she was sad about it, and the TH line afterwards seemed producer-driven.  After all, Jilly Muffin makes everything better!  Can't wait to see Jessa's send-off as a study in contrasts.

Edited October 29, 2014 by joanofarch4

[NausetGirl]

A covenant marriage basically just prohibits a no-fault divorce. It does not make you super special or more godly, it just makes it more difficult to get out of bad marriage.

 

OK, thanks Kaos Agent.  Sounds like a not-great idea.  And sadly, exactly like something a Duggar would do.

Edited October 29, 2014 by NausetGirl

[Lizziedrew]

I also noticed that everyone was fixated on Jill and Derick having kids immediately, but I realized two things: one, she got pregnant riiiiiiiight after the wedding -- and the TH's were shot after the wedding, so the family probably already knew she was pregnant at that point and wanted to be just oh so precious and coy thinking they look like they "called it." Two, this family is all about breeding so it's the first thing they all think of.

 

Just once though, I wish someone would say "yay that they are married! I really hope they take some time together to travel/learn/have a hobby before they start a family." Never gonna happen. It would be interesting to see if the baby baby baby talk is the same around Jessa's wedding.

[The Ascension]

I am so glad the Season of Jill is over. 

 

-It makes me so sad that they went right into parenthood after marriage. At least Josh and Anna had four months. They don't know each other at all! But whatever, they have a very, very, very, very serious covenant so they're stuck with each other. :)

 

-Ew the barefeet. Wear flats! Flip flops! Anything is better than dirty bare feet at a (semi) formal occasion.

 

-pretty sure one of her notes to Derrick said "your girl 4ever".

 

-I still can't get over how many people were invited. I'm breaking out into hives figuring out my own guest list. And it's like 130 people. Haha. But I want to feed my guests and treat them like they matter, so. But hey, do all those volunteers want to take their servants hearts and come help me? 

 

-Loved that they hung out together before the wedding.

 

-Cathy is a classy, classy lady. Love her.

 

-The running was so weird. So weird.

 

-I really liked Anna all season, but damn Josh. I will never, ever warm to him. Ever.

 

-They could try to pass off the tears as "happy tears", but nope. Not buying it.

 

-I love Jana so much. I hope she finds someone deserving of her.

 

-Dad/daughter moments before walking down the aisle are my favorite. Jim Boob is always a cringeworthy weirdo but they were sweet before the aisle walk.

 

-Why did he have to be up there to announce 'you may now kiss your bride?' The creepiness will never end.

 

-Jill's dress was pretty and she looked so happy, but the make-up and hair= awful. Amy looked better than all of them (except for Cathy).

 

-Yeah, they really should have at least talked through the kiss beforehand. Agh, so awkward. 

[Jellybeans]

The church well it didn't look like any church I have been too.

 

We have a Church just like that in our town. It's a Mega-Church and you sit on folding chairs. Ugly!

[wanderwoman]

Erin's piano playing has never been up my alley. The over-the-top flourishes and ridiculous refrain peddle pounding as well as the least delicate approach possible on the keyboard results in a very Lurch quality to the music. One images Brahms and Bethovej standing in ghost form, behind Erin, cringing and whispering "it's a piano, not a tool bench".

Jill looked beautiful. No snark. All brides look pretty, to me. Her lack of shoes doesn't bother me because I didn't wear shoes when I married wanderman. We got married on a beach, but... whatever. The bridesmaid's dresses weren't a disaster, but they didn't fit the venue.

I'm also not a fan of the "first look", two hours before, but only because the hair gets missed, the make-up gets smudged and by the time you hit the later, you look like you're an hour into a reception. Further, I actually felt bad for them because, as Derick said, "I want to kiss you." That's a healthy, normal, non-sinful reaction when your one-and-only appears from around a corner looking more beautiful and more in love with you than you've ever seen before. It's a beautiful moment that was false because of a stupid ideal.

I think Derick's step dad looked pensive. His wife literally left a quarantined hospital room to spend an hour with a thousand people. He was probably scared shitless. As a mom, I would have made Kathy's choice to be there in a heartbeat. What would have been sweet and more precious would have been to allow the minister, Jill, Derick, and maybe two attendants, to go into a room and say the vows again or prior to the ceremony.

The reception was a joke. Sorry. It was. The runaway recessional was a little immature, but meh'. I, too, though Jill and derick were running to a closet to bang one out. After all, the rulebook clearly states that a Dillard-Duggar conceived in a church will be the next Jesus. It's just the way it is.

[mimionthebeach]

That was one of the worst weddings that I have ever seen. Jill looked ackward like she really didn't want to be there. The church well it didn't look like any church I have been too.

 

And the food or lack there of was unbelievable.  My Catholic Italian family likes to feed people and we always have a ton of food at parties they would be horrified by being served popcorn, pickles and sheet cake or cupcakes. I wonder what they served at the house afterwards?

 

Oh. my. I have been to many Catholic Italian weddings and, foodwise, they are at the absolute opposite end of the spectrum to this kind of wedding. Apples and oranges. Or cookies and midnight sweet tables...

[Ilovemylabs]

OK, my thoughts regarding the wedding.

I thought Jill looked lovely and I liked her color choices for everyone...the men looked great.  Not a great fan of the bridesmaid's dresses, but bridesmaid's dresses are a joke in almost every wedding!  I didn't  like Michelle's dress but I didn't hate it either.  I don't think grey is a good color for her.  The ceremony was fine.  Little kids are always a risk at a wedding.  If you are doing casual, then you go with it.  If you want really formal, don't have little ones in the ceremony.  This was a casual affair.  Thought Amy and Grandma Duggar looked wonderful (especially Amy).  So delighted that Kathy could make the ceremony.  I think there was genuine joy by all that she could be there.

Music was too intense.  Erin should have reduced the volume and intensity.  The string quartet would have been better. Glad to see Gil and Kelly Bates at the rehersal dinner.  Someone said they have their own show on another channel.  Details please?  I did not like the run down the aisle or Ben grabbing Jessica to escort her out.  I think Josh stole the idea from Ben and grabbed Anna.  The food was appropriate for their traditions. 

This show could have been a half hour if they had edited out everyone saying they couldn't believe the day was here, the family wouldn't be the same now, they would miss Jill, etc.  Just my opinion.  Jill and Derick were happy with everything and that's really all that matters.

Edited October 29, 2014 by Ilovemylabs

[BitterApple]

I don't know why the girls didn't spring for a good haircut, deep conditioning treatment and blowout for the wedding. Jill's hair looked scraggly and dried out. What was the point of doing the test run at the beauty salon when every single one of them just ended up with the same standard barrel curls they wear every day?

 

I'm not sure why Josh and Jessa were so bitchy over this wedding. It ended up being a typical tacky bare minimum Duggar affair. It wasn't like Jill was serving up prime rib and Lobster at the Ritz Carlton or anything. I didn't find the event to be any more extravagant than any of the other weddings we've seen on the show.

 

ETA: I understand serving full meals isn't normal in Duggar circles, but I feel they should have had a more balanced selection of finger foods. They could have done cheese and crackers, veggies and dip, pasta salad, rolled up cold cuts etc. Jill's food was sugar on top of sugar. It made me nauseous just looking at it.

Edited October 29, 2014 by BitterApple

[GEML]

The way Erin played piano is classic, old style Appalachian style.  It's learned by playing by ear -- it's a very distinctly way of playing that actually goes back to Scot-Irish ways of playing stringed instruments in a chord progression.  It's actually the way my mother plays.  She was very disappointed that none of her daughters learned to play that way - but we're all classically trained.  :)

[jb0495]

After all the talk of Derick dipping Jill, I thought he'd dip her sideways so you'd see the kiss. Like we saw in one of the posed wedding pictures and in the kissing picture of Mechelle and JB in front of the car that they show.

I'm wondering if it was almost deliberate so that the cameras didn't catch it? Since he dipped her backwards.

From the rehearsal, it seemed like Derick & Jill planned to run out after the ceremony. I think all the other couples followed suit and it wasn't planned. I thought it was kind of cute but a shame because Derick & Jill probably wanted the rest to walk out which would give them more time.

I also was surprised at what was left out, I would have liked to see some explaining of the mother/father wedding attire, heard from the groomsmen & other guests. It also looked like D&J left the reception quickly. It's a shame they didn't have tables for people to sit down. Even Priscilla & TFDW had decorated tables and the cake cutting was a moment everyone watched from their seats.

[mbutterfly]

They can still divorce, but it needs to be for a reason like abuse, adultery, or one spouse committing a felony. It can't be just because they got tired of each other, or had different life goals that made them grow apart. A covenant marriage is different from a standard marriage license.

 

Here is the related Arkansas law ftp://www.arkleg.state.ar.us/acts/2001/htm/ACT1486.pdf

(2 other states, Arizona and Louisiana have their own covenant marriage laws.)

That is interesting. I didn't realize it was a matter of law. 

[NausetGirl]

I found the TH's extremely distracting. They tried to make them appear to be filmed before the wedding but Derick and Jill went in for a kiss so many times before they realized they weren't "supposed" to do that yet. Cue them talking about the wedding in the past tense and wearing the exact same clothes. I got a chuckle when Ben and Jessa couldn't figure out if they were engaged yet or not!

 

My favorite TH was when Jinger and Jessa were talking about the first kiss.  Jinger said something like "Pretty good...it's not like they had a chance to rehearse or anything." and she nudged Jessa ever so slightly with a sly look on her face.  I so hope Jessa is sneaking off to get some practice kisses in with Ben, or that Jinger is chaperoning and looking the other way for a small price.

 

OMG, yes. TLC must think the viewing public is really dumb. Or maybe TLC is just lazy? Regardless, VERY sloppy production all the way around this season - and this 2-hour special seems to have just been more than the team could cope with. Game shows are usually shot 3 episodes in one day and they are careful to have contestants and emcees change clothing for each episode.  Why weren't Duggars wearing different outfits for their THs on this episode?  In some Duggars are talking pre-wedding, in some post.  But they're wearing the same outfits throughout.  And Ben and Jessa not being able to recall whether or not they were engaged was HILARIOUS.  Those two win the Lame prize for this episode.

[BitterApple]

I also was surprised at what was left out, I would have liked to see some explaining of the mother/father wedding attire, heard from the groomsmen & other guests. It also looked like D&J left the reception quickly. It's a shame they didn't have tables for people to sit down. Even Priscilla & TFDW had decorated tables and the cake cutting was a moment everyone watched from their seats.

Considering they had a "professional" wedding planner in VEnessa, you'd think adequate seating would have been a no-brainer. Kind of like Wedding Planning 101. They didn't even have cloths on the tables the desserts were set up on. In contrast, I thought Priscilla's wedding was surprisingly well-done, but I'm guessing we have TFDW to thank for that. 

 

I also agree the production value on this one was terrible. We got an hour and a half of Boob saying how sad he was to give his wittle Jilly Muffin away, but no footage of friends and other family members. I also would have liked to have seen more of the reception. 

 

Regarding Josh and Bin "stealing" their wimmin away from Derick's lecherous, scheming groomsman, I'm not so sure that was planned. I thought Jessa's partner looked taken aback when Bin stormed the aisle and dragged Jessa off. Unless Jill did plan it out but neglected to tell Derick's friends. Either way it was fun to watch Bin make a complete ass out of himself.

[JerseyGirl]

I recall at one point when JB was talking to Jessa about HER engagement/wedding, Jessa hinted that maybe she and Bin should elope.  I think that took JB by surprise.

[mbutterfly]

I thought I heard Jim Bob say that he and Michelle were married "over there" (referring to the sanctuary) and then mentioned that Jill was getting married in the auditorium.  That's why it was a stage and not an altar.

 

As for Erin Bates, they showed her playing piano as they went to a commercial right before the wedding started, and that music sounded pretty.  The piano playing during the ceremony, though... not so much.

I didn't know whether it was Erin playing during the processional, but it didn't sound good and -- as someone mentioned above -- the piano sounded out of tune and like what I think of as a neglected piano. Given the auditorium (instead of the sanctuary many of us are used to) worship center, I'm guessing the instruments usually used are electronic, and the piano may be rarely used for worship. 

[Skittl1321]

But still what's the difference between the two? Divorce is divorce. The only thing I see with the covenant marriage is the couple attend counseling, hopefully a real therapist

 

The difference is that according to some religions, availability of no-fault divorces ruined marriage.  People could just get un-married because they wanted to. The availability of a covenant marriage means that a marriage has to stay together unless there is a state-approved reason for it's break up.  It increases the 'sanctity' of marriage by making it harder to just give up on a marriage. A divorce takes a lot more time and effort.

 

Basically, it is a way to increase religion in government, while making it look secular. 

 

For a long time, no-fault divorces didn't exist. And a lot of people stayed married, but lived totally seperate lives because there was no way to get out of this. These marriages just bring back to those times (though living seperately for 2 years is grounds for divorce...but in a normal marriage, you could be divorced and back to your own life way sooner than that.)

Edited October 29, 2014 by Skittl1321

[JerseyGirl]

Covenant marriages hold couples to a higher level of commitment by requiring they receive counseling before the wedding and that the spouses seek additional counseling before a divorce is granted. There are also limitations on what grounds for divorce are considered valid: A married couple may divorce if one spouse commits adultery, a serious crime or is abusive. On top of it all, the couple must live separately without reconciling for two years. (That is extended to 30 months if minor children are involved, but may be decreased to 12 months if the grounds for divorce are abuse.) Covenant marriages are only offered in Arkansas, Arizona and Louisiana.

 

http://starcasm.net/archives/294283

[StaceyNotStacie]

I was amused by Michelle admitting that the girls found the dress for her.  I can't help but wonder if they picked out an awful dress on purpose to get back at their mother in some sort of way.  

 

I agree with the others that the piano playing was awful.  Jim Bob looked plain sleazy with his smirk when he announced that he was the one giving Jill away to be married.

 

I wonder if there will be any changes made to Jessa's wedding based on the reaction to seeing Jill's wedding televised.

[mbutterfly]

The way Erin played piano is classic, old style Appalachian style.  It's learned by playing by ear -- it's a very distinctly way of playing that actually goes back to Scot-Irish ways of playing stringed instruments in a chord progression.  It's actually the way my mother plays.  She was very disappointed that none of her daughters learned to play that way - but we're all classically trained.  :)

Thank you for sharing this information. My mother, who has been gone many years, played that way. She didn't read music and she simply had a rather lengthy number of songs she played. She played only for her own amusement at home, often while she was alone when we were at school and my dad was at work. In fact, I would have barely known she played except on a few occasions when I was home sick and her heard from upstairs. Her playing style was rather mysterious to me, but I think this is what it was as that was her heritage. 

[fesspoire]

A better look at Cathy's elegant attire vs. Michelle's ode to a silver Christmas tree dress. To quote Jim Bob: "You can't say that isn't a modest dress!"