S15.E09: Are You Going to Gaslight Me?

[Emma Snyder]

Quote

As the newlywed strangers enter their third week of marriage, the topic of love is on everyone's minds; deep questions lead to unexpected revelations, and spouses have to face uncompromising attitudes and unforgiven mistakes.

Airs Wednesday, August 31 at 8:00 PM EDT.

[Crashcourse]

I like Krysten.  I like Mitch.  They're just not a good match.

Nate and Stacia could have had roles as married zombies on The Walking Dead.  

[Elizzikra]

I just used a paper napkin and I swear I can feel Mitch's wrath from the other side of the country...

[kristen111]

Mitch is getting on my nerves with the jello things she had to buy.  Who could live the way he does?  Just because he’s into that saving the planet thing doesn’t mean she has to also.  Their marriage is all about him.

What does Statia want from Nate, an admission of love?  The guy is at a 4, so she looks pissed.  She’s in her thirties.  Why not have some sex already?  They are married.  Why not show him that you care for him and the number will go higher.   Her method, whatever it is is not working.  Show him a little.  She’s too stiff.  She has a very high opinion of herself.

These couples are not matched well.

Sweet little Lindy is really letting things out now, loud and clear.  She’s very adamant about what she wants.  Looks like he’s caving in.  I thought he was waiting for decision day to make up his mind about this marriage.

Edited September 1, 2022 by kristen111

[mythoughtis]

Mitch thinks he needs a vow of poverty.  Yet he’s got multiple surf and paddle boards and wet suits.  So he doesn’t mind spending money on his interests 

stacia - quit begging for love at three weeks.   Nate has told you multiple times he is not ready to say it 

Miguel’s friend - what the hell?    No one is perfect - be careful running down someone to their spouse 

Edited September 1, 2022 by mythoughtis

[Mr. Miner]

I can barely listen to Mitch. Dude is lame AF! 

[Elizzikra]

Quote

I can barely listen to Mitch. Dude is lame AF! 

He is so judgemental but I'll bet he can't stand to have such laser-focused judgement turned his way.

Binh's Korean barbecue was perfect for Morgan. I think that sort of gesture (dinner waiting after a long work day) is exactly what she needs. I still think they are a mismatch but it was nice to see.

[mythoughtis]

So Mitch doesn’t want people running down the way he thinks…but he does that same thing to Krysten about flipping houses?   He was extremely mean about it too 

Edited September 1, 2022 by mythoughtis

[Elizzikra]

Ok - the shirt thing is cute and Mitch is being a total dick about it. He sounds like a toddler. 

Run, Krysten.

[Crashcourse]

I cracked up about UglyShirtGate! 😅

He looks much better in the black shirt and it's a plus that he doesn't want other people buying him clothes. 

Poor Justin.  Bless his heart.

[Retired at last]

Sounds like things are actually happening tonight. Thanks for the comments. I may watch this one. It doesn't start here for another 90 minutes, so I will keep checking back here. Also, at least on my program guide, it looks like Lifetime has canned that stupid 5 days show, or whatever it was, since the Afterparty is on right after this week's episode of MAFS.

That is just too bizarre that people are forcing their stranger spouses to declare their love so soon. I would think that if they did, THAT would be suspicious to me. They have been together for just 3 weeks! I know that someone gets "assigned" that particular issue every season, so the "drama". builds. 

[Kiss my mutt]

I’m surprised Mitch didn’t bitch that the shirt wasn’t second hand.

The look on Lindy’s face when  Miguel was telling her he wouldn’t stick around for someone who loses it or falls apart all the time was like “Oh, F*ck”. 
That girl couldn’t hold it together if her life depended on it.  Might be why she only works part time. 

Edited September 1, 2022 by Kiss my mutt
Miguel not Mitch

[Crashcourse]

I'm tired of all of these bleeped out words, even by the so-called therapist.

Krysten is right saying she feels lost in trying to please Mitch.   I think she's done, and so is he.

Lindy is gaslighting Mitch.  She's already letting him know that when she goes batshit crazy on him, it'll be his fault if he doesn't forgive her.

[Kiss my mutt]

It’s so uncomfortable watching Justin and Alexis. Things just escalate so quickly into yelling. I’m about twenty minutes behind but damn, poor Krysten has to jolly Mitch along with everything. How exhausting and very little payoff. 

[Mr. Miner]

It’s Lindy and Miguel. 😉

Edited September 1, 2022 by Mr. Miner

[mythoughtis]

Just wear the shirt Mitch.  Krysten even explained the situation to you.  Grumpy old man 

He doesn’t want people buying him things he might not want…. but he gave Krysten a necklace that a five year old would give their mom( the glued seashell) 

Edited September 1, 2022 by mythoughtis

[Elizzikra]

2 minutes ago, mythoughtis said:

Just wear the shirt Mitch.  Krysten even explained the situation to you.  Grumpy old man 

And then he walks in with such a pissy expression on his face. It's not a hair shirt for God's sake, Mitch. It's not a demand for comformity. It's just a shirt.

[Kiss my mutt]

Mitch needs to get over himself. The other couples are like, um, kay…

Just getting to the couples therapy part.

[Jeanne222]

Tonight was exceptionally boring. I fast forwarded the program and kept asking “when will it end”!

[mythoughtis]

Sasha wants too much too soon.    Look around.  The other 4 couples aren’t where she thinks she is either. 
 

[Kiss my mutt]

I like the new psychologist. Can she take Dr. Pepper’s place? Is she just there as a guest? I thought that’s what I heard. 

[gingerandcloves]

2 minutes ago, Kiss my mutt said:

I like the new psychologist. Can she take Dr. Pepper’s place? Is she just there as a guest? I thought that’s what I heard. 

I think she's only here for one episode, but maybe they'll bring her back next season.

[kristen111]

The shirt that killed the marriage.  Krysten is bending backwards to salvage this Union out of desperation.  I can’t imagine having kids with this nut job.  What will they eat?  What can they wear?  He’s insane.  Dump him now.  The guy is a mental case and she’s bending to his every whim.
 

[kristen111]

Binh is really trying.  The dinner he made her was from his heart.  His upbringing made him what he is, but in time, he will make it right.  I think they will survive this marriage.

  Lindy talks so much and so long, I don’t understand what she is saying.  Too much jibber jabber.  She can drive someone nuts.

Statia better give him some loving.  She wants an  I love you?  What does he want?  Maybe some affection?   She runs the whole show there.  I find her cold.

[buttersister]

Serena or this bunch? Easy call and from the comments, as expected, a good one.

I just don't like most of these people. I feel sorry for Krysten. That's about it.

[Empress1]

34 minutes ago, Elizzikra said:

And then he walks in with such a pissy expression on his face. It's not a hair shirt for God's sake, Mitch. It's not a demand for comformity. It's just a shirt.

That he’d wear for like two hours of his life. He was being ridiculous. I’ve cut Mitch slack, but he was being ridiculous. 

Mitch is 100% wrong for this show because he needs someone very specific: a far-left environmentalist, super crunchy type. That informs every aspect of his life - if he has kids, it’ll affect what they eat, wear, and play with, etc. Krysten is a great candidate because she’s kind of basic (I don’t mean that as an insult; there’s just nothing extreme about her) and wants to be married, so she’ll try to make anything work (as evidenced by the fact that she’s trying to make this work). Neither is really wrong (though Mitch is judgmental); they’re just wrong for each other. Mitch wasn’t wrong about house flipping driving up housing costs, but that’s not something Krysten is concerned about.

Stacia needs to learn that you can’t nag someone into loving you, and why would you want to? I don’t think she loves Nate as a person; I think she’s excited that she can check marriage and possibly kids off her to-do list. Nate could be anyone.

Morgan and Binh are not a couple. Nothing about them says couple. She says she wants more affection but she shows him none. He put together a really nice dinner; she … made him take a mermaid class (which, good for the instructor for getting people to pay her for that).

8 minutes ago, kristen111 said:

Binh is really trying.  The dinner he made her was from his heart.  His upbringing made him what he is, but in time, he will make it right.  I think they will survive this marriage.

I don’t, and I don’t think they should. That side hug when she got home told me all I needed to know, and she doesn’t seem to like him much. He IS trying; she is not.

[kristen111]

40 minutes ago, mythoughtis said:

Just wear the shirt Mitch.  Krysten even explained the situation to you.  Grumpy old man 

He doesn’t want people buying him things he might not want…. but he gave Krysten a necklace that a five year old would give their mom( the glued seashell) 

He probably buys all his shit in the Thrift Store.  Old and used.  Looks like he has a few new surf boards tho.

[Elizzikra]

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made him take a mermaid class (which, good for the instructor for getting people to pay her for that).

I'm sure that was producer driven, but I thought it looked like fun. Though I'll bet I'd feel like I was drowning after about 15 seconds...

[Adeejay]

I think three weeks is way too soon to be talking about “love”; they hardly know each other.

Mitch is such a douche, only he would call a co-worker who is taking over for him while he is out, “an heir.” So, I guess his wife is supposed to take a vow of poverty, because he feels empathy for those who have less than them.  Good luck with that.  Don’t know who I despise more, Morgan or Mitch.

[Empress1]

1 minute ago, Adeejay said:

Mitch is such a douche, only he would call a co-worker who is taking over for him while he is out, “an heir.”

I thought he’d been promoted or transferred and was training his replacement - the person who “inherited” his old role. He’s not off work; he’d been at work that day. I think the only time the casts take off is for the honeymoons; the rest of the show is filmed around their jobs.

[Racj82]

5 hours ago, Crashcourse said:

I like Krysten.  I like Mitch.  They're just not a good match.

Nate and Stacia could have had roles as married zombies on The Walking Dead.  

You lost me at I like Mitch.

[Racj82]

4 hours ago, Crashcourse said:

I cracked up about UglyShirtGate! 😅

He looks much better in the black shirt and it's a plus that he doesn't want other people buying him clothes. 

Poor Justin.  Bless his heart.

I don't get this either. I know the expert made a joke about it being easy to say just put on the shirt but...just put on the fucking shirt. It was the lightest of pranks. He wasn't supposed to look better in it. It was a silly little joke.

Mitch can not handle anything not being done his way. It's a really shitty way to go about having a union with another human being. He pushes back in every single decision. Everything is an excuse for a lecture or rant. If you can't compromise on the littlest of things, what are they doing here. This isn't Mitch’s world.

Damn he gets on my fucking nerves. He got lucky he got put with someone who REALLY wants to make this work.

4 hours ago, Retired at last said:

Sounds like things are actually happening tonight. Thanks for the comments. I may watch this one. It doesn't start here for another 90 minutes, so I will keep checking back here. Also, at least on my program guide, it looks like Lifetime has canned that stupid 5 days show, or whatever it was, since the Afterparty is on right after this week's episode of MAFS.

That is just too bizarre that people are forcing their stranger spouses to declare their love so soon. I would think that if they did, THAT would be suspicious to me. They have been together for just 3 weeks! I know that someone gets "assigned" that particular issue every season, so the "drama". builds. 

Things have been happening. This has been one of the most interesting and well rounded season in years. Just watch it.

[Adeejay]

Some people never learn.  If your friend has shown himself/herself to be a gossip monger, and is married to a gossip monger, why oh why would you gossip with him/her? Binh deserves whatever Morgan does to him.

[Racj82]

3 hours ago, Jeanne222 said:

Tonight was exceptionally boring. I fast forwarded the program and kept asking “when will it end”!

I'm not sure how this was boring or what else should be going on.

I think this episode did a good job fleshing out the participants.

I found Bihn opening up really necessary. He has been so wooden.

In general, i thought everyone did a good job of opening up.

it also led to some conflict but not of the over the top variety.

But, otherwise, what in the hell did Bihn say about Morgan? Allegedly

Also, don't tell Justin or Alexis anything. They clearly have loose lips.

[Chalby]

I find Mitch to be a huge wet blanket. There's being environmentally aware, and there's blind soapbox preaching. Mitch appears to assume that everyone in this group has never cared about the environment, and he's here to educate the group.

When he begins to tell Kristen that flipping houses is not fair to people who cannot afford a home, I wanted to scream that he is acting like an asshole! Kristen can't afford a house, which is why she wants to start flipping houses. And he is trying to make her feel guilty that she wants to spend the money she earns flipping a house on herself and her life? It's like he only wants to live in a country where everyone is equally oppressed.

[kristen111]

4 hours ago, Kiss my mutt said:

I like the new psychologist. Can she take Dr. Pepper’s place? Is she just there as a guest? I thought that’s what I heard. 

When she came on I shut the tv.  Everyone annoyed me last night except Binh.  I’m liking him more.  Alexa is still holding the grudge about the dog.  She’s 50 percent at fault.  I don’t know about her.  She’s in love with herself.  I don’t know if there’s room for another, lol.  Justin doesn’t know if he’s coming or going with her.

[Chalby]

1 hour ago, Adeejay said:

Some people never learn.  If your friend has shown himself/herself to be a gossip monger, and is married to a gossip monger, why oh why would you gossip with him/her? Binh deserves whatever Morgan does to him.

Have I missed some other issues shared? I thought the only thing Binh did was talk about her being three credits short of her degree.

If that was the only secret shared (and he apologized profusely for it) everyone should move on. If there was something more though, I have clearly forgotten.

[Chalby]

6 hours ago, kristen111 said:

Lindy is really letting things out now, loud and clear.  She’s very adamant about what she wants.  Looks like he’s caving in.  

I agree with you, especially about Mitch. He behaves so obnoxiously when it comes to addressing others about his environmental beliefs. He has this arrogance when he speaks which doesn't match his unkempt  appearance. (I tend to giggle when he goes on about materialism - we SEE you don't care).

I think Miguel will come to realize Lindy is going to be the best match he will get, so compromising with her is a lot easier than living life alone, with weekly meetings where he and his friends can dress up and play games.

Heck, I'd like to be around Lindy with her willingness to speak openly, as well as with her upbeat 'can do' attitude.

12 minutes ago, kristen111 said:

Alexa is still holding the grudge about the dog.  She’s 50 percent at fault.  I don’t know about her.  She’s in love with herself.  

Yes, yes, yes!! She is being ridiculous, and frankly she is never going to be ready for marriage. She needs to just be independent, live with her dogs, and quit trying to fit a man into her life.

[Chalby]

My cousin asked me why I despised Mitch so much when he is clearly "harmless". As I was struggling to explain what annoyed me specifically about Mitch ... it came to me.

If it were Mitch's birthday, Kristen would buy him something that he once spoke of, or she knew that he would love it because of his environmental activism.

If Mitch were to buy Kristen a gift, it would be something that he once spoke of, or something he loved because of his environmental activism.

To me, this is Mitch in a nutshell. 

Edited September 1, 2022 by Chalby

[shok]

I like Mitch (and I find him very physically attractive too) and I commend him for his fervent environmentalism. We need an awful lot more Mitches in this world to try and keep it liveable.

[suzeecat]

Welp, Mitch would be easy to buy for, just get him nothing.  Or better yet, pick up something lying around the house and hand it to him and say "Happy Birthday" - don't even bother to wrap it because he would be offended by the paper waste! 

This season they seem to be really concentrating more on everyone doing things as a group.  I think it makes things more interesting and I find that the one-on-one "private" conversations just make me tense. 

I was embarrassed for Binh for having to do that mermaid activity.  They were really reaching with that - it was pretty stupid. 

Alexis and Justin, I find myself tuning out with them.  All I hear is "Blah,Blah,BLah".

[endure]

11 hours ago, Elizzikra said:

Ok - the shirt thing is cute and Mitch is being a total dick about it. He sounds like a toddler. 

Run, Krysten.

He really needs to lighten up and get a life….. and she is caving in too much to his values too often and she will maybe resent him for that later.

[mythoughtis]

6 hours ago, Chalby said:

Have I missed some other issues shared? I thought the only thing Binh did was talk about her being three credits short of her degree.

If that was the only secret shared (and he apologized profusely for it) everyone should move on. If there was something more though, I have clearly forgotten.

The one time we have been shown is that conversation- which also includes finances.  
 

we won’t know about the next one until next week as it was only mentioned in the previews.  Therefore we also don’t know if Binh’s conversation with Justin was in a group, producer driven,  etc.  all we know is that Justin told Alexis who told Morgan.   Multiple offenders here 

Edited September 1, 2022 by mythoughtis

[kristen111]

Why would an expert match Krysten, who just came out of an almost marriage, match her with a kook like Mitch?  For drama?  I think it’s was very cruel.

Alexia .. put some clothes on that fit your body type, not like a sausage being stuffed in.  It looks raunchy.

[Empress1]

28 minutes ago, kristen111 said:

Alexia .. put some clothes on that fit your body type, not like a sausage being stuffed in.  It looks raunchy.

Alexis dresses really badly, I’m sorry. I think she’s in a hot pink catsuit next episode and the blue thing she was in in the group scene didn’t fit. She also wears a TON of makeup - her foundation appeared to have an orange cast to it in the group scene.

[Rebky]

11 hours ago, mythoughtis said:

Just wear the shirt Mitch.  Krysten even explained the situation to you.  Grumpy old man 

He doesn’t want people buying him things he might not want…. but he gave Krysten a necklace that a five year old would give their mom( the glued seashell) 

And I would be bitchy enough to bring that up in front of everyone and announce that necklace will forever be a permanent resident of my jewelry box. I would not put up with his crap for 5 minutes. He makes me stabby.

[Racj82]

11 hours ago, Kiss my mutt said:

I like the new psychologist. Can she take Dr. Pepper’s place? Is she just there as a guest? I thought that’s what I heard. 

We have two new experts this year. Dr. Viviana is done with the show. So, we will be seeing a couple of new faces.

3 hours ago, shok said:

I like Mitch (and I find him very physically attractive too) and I commend him for his fervent environmentalism. We need an awful lot more Mitches in this world to try and keep it liveable.

That's not really what anyone is talking about.

We need people who want to make the world a better place. We don't need people who makes every single situation an environmental/social issue. He keeps talking about how he understands Krysten can't be 100 percent on his level in terms of environment while constantly coming at her and forcing changes. Judging her life choices. There isn't anything wrong with bringing up the housing situation. But, bringing it up over and over, it is just too much.

[Kimboweena]

12 hours ago, mythoughtis said:

but he gave Krysten a necklace that a five year old would give their mom( the glued seashell) 

Did that happen on this episode?  Missed that. 

Someone please explain to a 60-year old (obviously too sheltered) woman, what was Alexis doing?  Was it vaping, smoking, hookah? Thanks.

[Crashcourse]

8 hours ago, Racj82 said:

You lost me at I like Mitch.

Well don't worry.  I won't look for you in the lost and found bin!  🤣  

[Booger666]

1 hour ago, Racj82 said:

We need people who want to make the world a better place. We don't need people who makes every single situation an environmental/social issue. He keeps talking about how he understands Krysten can't be 100 percent on his level in terms of environment while constantly coming at her and forcing changes. Judging her life choices. There isn't anything wrong with bringing up the housing situation. But, bringing it up over and over, it is just too much.

Excellent point.  Mitch asked Krysten to share her goals and dreams, and when he does he shuts her down and tells her she’s wrong.  Like, WTF?!  She even tried to accommodate his goals by talking about ways to do it sustainably.  A better approach would have been to ask Krysten if there were ways to do a flip and keep it affordable or to suggest something that would appeal to first time home buyers so they could have a discussion.  Mitch is a self centered prick who thinks everything is his way or the highway.  

Edited September 1, 2022 by Booger666