S04.E13: No Kiss Friends

[Auntie Anxiety]

Insipidian better hope that young Tyrion doesn’t kill him with a bow and arrow while he’s taking a dump.

[South]

2 hours ago, goofygirl said:

Old Ick & Bertie bae are completely perfect for each other!!  They both CRY at the drop of a hat!!  Just look at Dannnnnnielle's face!!  She KNOWS this isn't going to end well.  Finally catching a clue.... DUH!

There is a video out there somewhere of a precious Golden Retriever sitting in the backseat of a car, flanked by two vociferous howling Siberian Huskies.  The Golden gives the sweetest side-eye to each, but maintains that smile against all misery.  

[heatherchandler]

Nick is too smart to work.  HAHAHAHAHAHA

I mean, I guess I’ll give him credit, he’s smart enough to figure out this sweet f-ing deal.

[applewood]

11 hours ago, candall said:

I think Dannnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnielle has been under Garrick's thumb since she was a teenager.  She's divorced now, with no education, no means of supporting herself and her children.  And isn't she very, very young?  22?  23?

I don't know.  I feel so sorry for her.

Actually, according to the internet, she turned 35 a few weeks ago at the beginning of August.

Perhaps you're thinking of "Other Danielle" who is 22.

Garrick is 38, about to be 39 in October. Yes, I think he and D. have been together a long time, since they were kids. That is probably why she is reluctant to leave him. She doesn't know anything else.

Somebody else asked about the age of their kids. I think they are around Middle school age. 12-13.

[Cancun]

13 hours ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

They should get the interpreter to become one of the wives. Then they can all communicate without the translation app.

Bonus - she’s cute! Ick is probably already plotting...

[Morgalisa]

14 hours ago, sainte-chapelle said:

Why doesn’t this grifter work? Jesus take the wheel these women are dumb. He is looking for money and sex. Point blank period. What does he provide exactly?

Pimps don't work.

[bichonblitz]

Roberta is the boss. There will be no 3rd wife. Ever. 

Boat boy's new house is weird. Who builds a house with a steep driveway incline like that? It's like walking up a mountain to get to the front door. And for cripes sake, put a backsplash in that kitchen! With all his money he sure had that home built on the cheap. I'm in the market for a new house so I notice these things.

It didn't take long to brainwash Danielle 2.0. Not long at all. She's 22, she will be pregnant and popping out babies very soon and according to her she doesn't like staying home so looks like Nicky will be running a daycare before he knows it. Or he will convince the breadwinners to hire a nanny so he can go off and think. 

[Morgalisa]

14 hours ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

Because Insipidian’s kids aren’t confused enough, let’s get them yet another mother figure.

Where is their mother? I know she split after Squeaky came along. But does she share custody of the kids? Have they said and I missed it?

[Adeejay]

Whenever Roberta starts whining about Garrick being with another woman, it reminds me of the banner of a play I once saw outside Manhattan’s Beacon Theatre: “Your Husband is Cheating on us.”  I loved how Dannielle just casually mentioned that there was no intimacy, “just kissing.” Some people would consider kissing more intimate than sex.   

So, Nick doesn’t work because he stays home and read up on Math and Science, to impart knowledge on their children.  Good to know.  Wonder if that is before or after he peruse porn sites. 

[princelina]

16 hours ago, sainte-chapelle said:

What is with the cowboy tie ? He looks like more of a dork than normal

I think that's his "dressy" look - remember the outfit when he went to brunch with Dannielle and Leah? 😂

16 hours ago, Grifter Lives said:

I think that there was a millisecond of a smile - Duper's Delight.  Then, she immediately changed to her sad, hound dog face.  I am surprised that she didn't cry.  I'm surprised that the translator didn't cry, asking herself why she is there.

Are you kidding?  I'd love that job 😃

16 hours ago, candall said:

Okay, good.  I can handle one more week, but then they need to wrap this up.  I'm only paying attention to the stories with a "Danielle" character.

In non-Danielle segments, they only have Boat Guy and Lil' Marcus, right?

And the hideous Sidian - I'm also watching him, but skipping Boat Boy and Florida crew.  Although I feel misled and disappointed - last week's previews made it look like his kid would object to the Phillipines gal! 😡

55 minutes ago, Morgalisa said:

Where is their mother? I know she split after Squeaky came along. But does she share custody of the kids? Have they said and I missed it?

I don't remember if she sees them or not, but they live with Sidian and his woman.  What's weird is that his third child has a different mother who wisely keeps her kid at home with her - but that's his middle child 🤔

[PrincessPurrsALot]

1 hour ago, Morgalisa said:

Where is their mother? I know she split after Squeaky came along. But does she share custody of the kids? Have they said and I missed it?

I think they have mentioned some shared custody but they live mainly with Squeaky and Insipidian.  Insipidian is a wanna be cult leader who lacks the charisma or personality to be one. 

[xwordfanatik]

I've heard of Sidian being referred to as Great Value Criss Angel.  Squeaky for Tosha is perfect.

[Pepper Mostly]

Dannnnnnielle is an idiot. 

That's it. That's the post. 

[Endora]

17 hours ago, candall said:

And isn't she very, very young?  22?  23?

Dannielle is 35 years old

Does boat boy really think April can parent children who are a few years younger than them?  He’s and idiot.  Brenda, please stop making that face your chin is constantly scrunched up and full of bumps.

I guess Bert didn’t like the thought that maybe she was not so special after all and just one of the potential crowd.  They are so afraid to lose her that they are letting her dictate the rules and regs.  She is having sex with Ick and he is not allowed to share an innocent kiss with another potential?  Enough with the crying, all they ever do is cry and wipe each other’s tears.  What an annoying trio.

The Nick Davis family  is creepy. Those women are making fools of themselves while his family and friends are likening him to a pimp.  I find them them all repulsive.  

Spoiler

Looks like Marcus has landed Chrissy of the Snowden family fame.

[xwordfanatik]

Ick's face is so stupid.  He's got his mouth open half the time, and looks like the idiot that he is, not to mention his dumb cowboy outfit.

56 minutes ago, Endora said:

Dannielle is 35 years old

Does boat boy really think April can parent children who are a few years younger than them?  He’s and idiot.  Brenda, please stop making that face your chin is constantly scrunched up and full of bumps.

I guess Bert didn’t like the thought that maybe she was not so special after all and just one of the potential crowd.  They are so afraid to lose her that they are letting her dictate the rules and regs.  She is having sex with Ick and he is not allowed to share an innocent kiss with another potential?  Enough with the crying, all they ever do is cry and wipe each other’s tears.  What an annoying trio.

The Nick Davis family  is creepy. Those women are making fools of themselves while his family and friends are likening him to a pimp.  I find them them all repulsive.  

  Reveal spoiler

Looks like Marcus has landed Chrissy of the Snowden family fame.

Yes to all of this.  And now we're going to have a couple of sham weddings?  TLC must be footing the bills.  Bunch of shitty people.

[Pepper Mostly]

Garrick makes absolutely no effort to hide the fact that he is utterly besotted with Bert. He's practically elbowing Dannnnnnielle out of the way in every scene. When they all walked into the restaurant he was holding Bert's hand, pulling out her chair, placing her right by his side, and in general treating her like she was a rare, precious object. Dumbass Dannnnnnnielle had to pull out her own chair and sit next to that poor hapless translator. How does she look at herself in the mirror and not see what a sad pathetic doormat she is? She's always red-eyed and miserable looking. She looks so awkward when she tries to join into Ick and Bert's tearful clinches. She sickens me. She allows this! At least the other skeevy creeps in this franchise make an effort to not look like they're playing favorites. (I know, low bar). 

Edited August 31, 2022 by Pepper Mostly

[suev3333]

21 hours ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

Marcus rocking the Timberland boots a la George Costanza.

He was rockin the Hennessy too    😏

[suev3333]

21 hours ago, sainte-chapelle said:

Why doesn’t this grifter work? Jesus take the wheel these women are dumb. He is looking for money and sex. Point blank period. What does he provide exactly?

Pimpin ain't easy !

(Sorry.....I just had to say that one more time)  😁

[suev3333]

20 hours ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

Because Insipidian’s kids aren’t confused enough, let’s get them yet another mother figure.

I know!!  That poor little boys face  ,  "do you understand that daddy needs a young woman to have sex with?  Are you ok with that"?   Disgusting.    Wait til your kids are grown and gone, then you can have a whole harem  .....geez...

[Canadian Girl]

25 minutes ago, suev3333 said:

I know!!  That poor little boys face  ,  "do you understand that daddy needs a young woman to have sex with?  Are you ok with that"?   Disgusting.    Wait til your kids are grown and gone, then you can have a whole harem  .....geez...

I haven't watched yet, did he really say that or are you summarizing the gist of it

[Auntie Anxiety]

5 hours ago, princelina said:

Are you kidding?  I'd love that job 😃

Translating for that crew? I’d laugh my ass off from morning till night. Best job ever.

[Auntie Anxiety]

44 minutes ago, suev3333 said:

Pimpin ain't easy !

🎶It’s Hard Out Here For a Pimp🎶 from Hustle and Flow. Nick got the “hustle” part right. 

[suev3333]

38 minutes ago, Canadian Girl said:

I haven't watched yet, did he really say that or are you summarizing the gist of it

The gist.    I was being sarcastic,  but he did ask him if bringing her into the family was ok with him

[xwordfanatik]

52 minutes ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

Translating for that crew? I’d laugh my ass off from morning till night. Best job ever.

They may as well bring her over with Bert.  Then Ick can make her #3.  Naw, she wouldn't buy their bullshit.  🙃

[PrincessPurrsALot]

Marcus has decided he'll be friends with Bina and Janae.  Great way to protect his ego rather than saying Bina won't let him control her and is dating others and Janae is not interested. 

If Bert actually moves to the US, will they hire a translator?  Otherwise they'll never be able to communicate with anything but tears. However, even with a translator, they could barely communicate.  Of course, they also use intimacy to mean sex and Bert, non-English speaker, understands that the word means more than that. 

Dannielle is finally "seeing some red flags."  We've all seen a parade of people waving red flags since the moment Bert was introduced. 

[princelina]

5 hours ago, xwordfanatik said:

And now we're going to have a couple of sham weddings?  TLC must be footing the bills.  Bunch of shitty people.

Because in all the years we've watched these doofuses (doofi?) Seeking Sister Wives, no one has actually found one except for the vag steamer, and we know how that turned out!  I guess they feel they owe us some "success stories" 😂

[Elizzikra]

A lot going on in this episode but for some reason, I'm left stuck on Dannielle's outfit for the plane ride home - that little green dress. Brazil to Colorado is one long trip and there is no way that she would be comfortable in that get up for the whole thing. If nothing else, I'd think she would freeze on the plane. I always do and I have a) more body fat than she does and b) wear more clothes.

[South]

6 hours ago, Pepper Mostly said:

Garrick makes absolutely no effort to hide the fact that he is utterly besotted with Bert. He's practically elbowing Dannnnnnielle out of the way in every scene. When they all walked into the restaurant he was holding Bert's hand, pulling out her chair, placing her  placing her right by his side, and in general treating her like she was a rare, precious object. Dumbass Dannnnnnnielle had to pull out her own chair and sit next to that poor hapless translator. How does she look at herself in the mirror and not see what a sad pathetic doormat she is? She's always red-eyed and miserable looking. She looks so awkward when she tries to join into Ick and Bert's tearful clinches. She sickens me. She allows this! At least the other skeevy creeps in this franchise make an effort to not look like they're playing favorites. (I know, low bar). 

He scoots over so that his stupid body is touching her at every point possible.  I think it was our #1 husband on this show, Kermit, that commented about keeping that crap (my word, definitely not his) for private moments.  To never be ogling one wife in the company of the other.  He saw it as his duty.  Dddd looked like the backup translator.  And the way he paws all over her…mostly Bert, but Dddd too.  Preening,moving hair strands adjusting straps, removing unseen particles from eyelashes.  Always so delicately and preciously.  Damn!  I want to know that I’m being touched by a man, not groomed by a parakeet!  Yuuu-uk.

4 hours ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

Translating for that crew? I’d laugh my ass off from morning till night. Best job ever.

Me:  oh, no no no.  No need to pay me.

[South]

On 8/29/2022 at 10:48 PM, Maybeitsme said:

What is happening with Sidian? He looks worse every time we see him

I think his dye-job faded.  Sort of lost his shaky hipster look.  Now he appears wan and average.  Not that he was a looker previously, just that the hair color completed his outward presentation.  It told us who he wants to be.  Now he looks like an average guy with no backstory to tell.  Oh, maybe his story is that he fell asleep on the sofa after staking up the tomato plants and his daughters put all of their bracelets and necklaces on him.  Now he has to take them all off before he leaves for his shift at The Waffle House.  We know that’s not what he’s shooting for, so maybe it was all of the salt water.  Now our hipster Jim Jones can get busy with his bottle of Preference.  He knows he’s worth it.

1 hour ago, Elizzikra said:

A lot going on in this episode but for some reason, I'm left stuck on Dannielle's outfit for the plane ride home - that little green dress. Brazil to Colorado is one long trip and there is no way that she would be comfortable in that get up for the whole thing. If nothing else, I'd think she would freeze on the plane. I always do and I have a) more body fat than she does and b) wear more clothes.

How did I miss that?  I even rewatched it today.

[South]

On 8/29/2022 at 10:42 PM, Auntie Anxiety said:

That’s going to be Danielle’s job. They timed it perfectly.

I wonder how gainfully employed she happens to be.  Will she be worth more to the stable to be out in the workplace or at home changing diapers and sharpening Ticonderogas for Nicks missives and essays?  Once she’s “in”, I fear the choice will be made for her.  Hopefully, they’ll at least be gentle enough to help her think that it’s her decision to make.

[Elizzikra]

12 hours ago, South said:

How did I miss that?  I even rewatched it today.

Maybe I'm mistaken - it's what she was wearing in the endless, tearful goodbye to Bert scene and I thought they were also on their way to the airport.

[Shelbie]

I can almost admire how Roberta manipulates Ick and Dannnnielle. She keeps them continually off guard and gets what she wants. They are idiots and refuse to see through her.

[xwordfanatik]

17 minutes ago, Shelbie said:

I can almost admire how Roberta manipulates Ick and Dannnnielle. She keeps them continually off guard and gets what she wants. They are idiots and refuse to see through her.

My reply:

She's played her cards very well, and is obviously smarter than they are.  It's almost painful to watch.

Edited August 31, 2022 by xwordfanatik

[kassa]

On 8/29/2022 at 10:07 PM, sainte-chapelle said:

So wait is out of town girl now into it?

Into playing out as much time on tv as possible? Sure.

On 8/29/2022 at 10:39 PM, sainte-chapelle said:

You know when they get home they will be caring for the kids and cleaning up his messes. He will also get a stay at home wife to be a nanny. This asshole.

He is also going to need his own place. You know, for the thinking and whatnot.  Just a small hip place downtown after they all move to the suburbs. It won't be that much more rent than they're covering now because there are 3 wives, and it will give him a place to audition the fourth and fifth without disturbing them or the baby by coming in in the middle of the night. 

[endure]

Oh dear me - get Dannielle & Garrick some meds, maybe some Prozac, there's way too much emotional lability, it's like they're grieving or something, even when they're not crying the facial grimacing and wincing is just too much.

And that was too much with Garrick and the bombshell packing up in almost their undies, didn't they know the camera crew was there?

All these people are so weird and creepy = triples?  TLC always trying normalise the absurds.

[goofygirl]

On 8/29/2022 at 9:58 PM, South said:

Did Ick just call her “Ber Ber”?

Where oh WHERE is our VOMIT emoji????

[heatherchandler]

20 hours ago, South said:

Me:  oh, no no no.  No need to pay me.

You know the translator goes home to her family and they are asking about her day and she is like “ohhhh listen to this shit!”

[goofygirl]

On 8/29/2022 at 11:38 PM, Auntie Anxiety said:

Insipidian better hope that young Tyrion doesn’t kill him with a bow and arrow while he’s taking a dump.

DEAD. DIED. GONE TO HEAVEN.

[magemaud]

On 8/30/2022 at 2:41 PM, princelina said:

Although I feel misled and disappointed - last week's previews made it look like his kid would object to the Phillipines gal! 

Yes, wasn’t that creative editing! On the preview when Sidian asked Tyrolean (or whatever) if he thought Arielle was a nice person, it made it look like the kid said “nope” when his answer really was “yeah.” For this reason, I’ve learned not to be fooled by the previews or commercials for the upcoming program. 

[goofygirl]

So.... Was it ever decided whether Liam is a girl or a boy?  I really don't know!

[endure]

55 minutes ago, heatherchandler said:

You know the translator goes home to her family and they are asking about her day and she is like “ohhhh listen to this shit!”

I was thinking they should marry the translator 🤣

[princelina]

10 minutes ago, goofygirl said:

So.... Was it ever decided whether Liam is a girl or a boy?  I really don't know!

Liam identifies as transgender.

[goofygirl]

OK.... but..... what did Liam start OUT as? Was Liam always the name??

[endure]

15 minutes ago, goofygirl said:

So.... Was it ever decided whether Liam is a girl or a boy?  I really don't know!

Sorry just an occasional watcher on this show, who is Liam?

[princelina]

4 minutes ago, goofygirl said:

OK.... but..... what did Liam start OUT as? Was Liam always the name??

To be honest I can't remember - but at the beginning of this season I think they said Liam was a new name; they definitely said they had moved from where they lived before because they thought the new place would be more accepting.  

[PrincessPurrsALot]

3 hours ago, goofygirl said:

OK.... but..... what did Liam start OUT as? Was Liam always the name??

Liam is Sidian's child.  Liam is their new name.  While the Sidian referred to Liam as transgender and as having chosen the name Liam, I am not certain if Liam uses he/him pronouns or they/them.  I believe at one point they mentioned using they/them.  We will accept either in the forum.  I do not recall the name that Liam was given at birth.  Given that they changed their name to reflect their gender identity, their old name should now not be used unless they choose to do so. 

Regardless of how Liam may have been viewed in the past in regards to gender or their name, we will now use the name Liam and either he/him pronouns or they/them pronouns. This aligns with the GLAAD guidelines which are in line with the site policies. 

Questions?  PM @PrincessPurrsALot

[South]

On 8/31/2022 at 12:45 AM, South said:

He scoots over so that his stupid body is touching her at every point possible.  I think it was our #1 husband on this show, Kermit, that commented about keeping that crap (my word, definitely not his) for private moments.  To never be ogling one wife in the company of the other.  He saw it as his duty.  Dddd looked like the backup translator.  And the way he paws all over her…mostly Bert, but Dddd too.  Preening,moving hair strands adjusting straps, removing unseen particles from eyelashes.  Always so delicately and preciously.  Damn!  I want to know that I’m being touched by a man, not groomed by a parakeet!  Yuuu-uk.

Me:  oh, no no no.  No need to pay me.

CORRECTION.  I said Kermit.  What the….?   I meant Colton, of the Winders.

[endure]

19 hours ago, goofygirl said:

DEAD. DIED. GONE TO HEAVEN.

Hopefully the happy 😊  place at last 

[princelina]

12 hours ago, South said:

CORRECTION.  I said Kermit.  What the….?   I meant Colton, of the Winders.

Wasn't Kermit his Primetimer alias? 😃

[South]

8 hours ago, princelina said:

Wasn't Kermit his Primetimer alias? 😃

Was it? Maybe that was somewhere in the back of my mind.  Any idea why we called him Kermit?