S01.E06: Intimacy

[Bella]

No description.

[ketose]

From TV Guide:

 

The couples deal with issues involving intimacy, trust and emotional connection.

[crgirl412]

 I can see Vaughn's point about wanting to spend with Monet but she's having a girl's night to build intimacy but man, Vaughn, you don't even want to freakin' talk on Sundays!  I think that would go on long way to build intimacy with Monet.     

[Primetimer]

And other not-quite-burning questions sparked by this week's Married At First Sight.

Read the story

[lovetowrite73]

I really hate myself for saying this, but I agree with Vaughn as far as the issue with her having her girls over. He was away for days. Why didn't you just have them over during that time? But as far as his other gripes - she doesn't cook, only gave him a little space - whatever, Mr. Petty. Look how small that apartment is. She doesn't have a lot of space for her stuff. And it's okay to offer to cook sometimes. And her dog?? Low blow, asshole.

Jason and Jaime both have to open up a little if they stand any chance of making it work.

[Bubbacat]

I almost had sympathy for Vaughn for a moment. It seemed like he and Monet had actually made a little progress in their "relationship" (and I use the term loosely). And then, after he'd been gone for a few days for work, he came home just wanting to relax with Monet -- only to find that she had scheduled a "girls' night." Yeah, that would tick me off, too. So I was leaning toward Vaughn's side. And then he made that "girl who doesn't cook" remark, and BANG! Right back to hating him. Well, at least the guy's consistent.

[Ohwell]

In Vaughn's defense about the cooking, he did say that if they were at his apartment, he would have been cooking for her.  I also don't blame him for not wanting to meet her girlfriends at that time. 

 

Monet needs to stop talking so much about body parts and such.  First, it was wanting someone to take her panties out of her butt crack.  Tonight, it's Vaughn holding her hand while she pees between two cars.  Not cute, Monet. 

 

I'm still sick of Jamie and those damn false eyelashes fluttering all the time.  Doug is such a lovesick puppy, and it's sad.  I'm waiting for her to throw him a dog biscuit.

 

I've still got hope for Courtney and Jason and I'm keeping my fingers crossed for them.  I'm SO glad they didn't match Jamie with Jason because she doesn't deserve him.

Edited August 13, 2014 by Ohwell

[ketose]

About 15 minutes into the episode, Jamie tweeted something about waiting for weeks until she finally had sex with Doug. The tweet was gone by the time I checked back on the timeline. I assume she accidentally spoiled a future reveal since their story line tonight ended with just dancing.

The episode itself was hokey. Cortney and Jason got shorted for time because they don't have any TV friendly problems. Vaughn and Monet decided to push down their problems for now. Doug and Jamie have the problem that they are like regular people and aren't two hamsters who have sex just because they were put in the same cage.

[PityFree]

Vaughn is getting on my last nerve. No, it wasn't great that Monet wanted friends over. But she cannot read your mind, a-hole. Last I could tell, you wanted quiet and hated how bubbly she is. Now she is supposed to know you wanted a quiet evening together? Just the two of you? Not three? Gah!

[butterly17]

I'm glad Jamie and Doug aren't having sex yet.... that's NORMAL. LOL Especially if they are taking things seriously.

Vaughn is an asshole, but so is Monet... maybe they deserve each other.

Jamie and Courtney are cute, but have they talked about ANYTHING important? Kids, Religion, Future plans?

[Ohwell]

I think Vaughn was right in this case.  The man had just come home from work.  I'm willing to bet that Monet wouldn't have liked it if he had invited his buddies over without checking with her first.

[butterly17]

According to Monet's twitter account the argument was heavily edited... and we didn't see what it was really about.  

 

https://twitter.com/monet_iam/status/499379480826499072

Edited August 13, 2014 by butterly17

[Arienne]

I am such a sucker for this show. I watch every episode with a silly grin on my face, it's shameful. I really thought Monet and Vaughn had turned a corner tonight only to be let down again and as much as I love Monet it was her fault this time. I agree with the poster who said she should have had girls night during the 2 days he was gone.

 

I have hope for all the couples, Romantic fool that I am.

[Katmai]

I still think Vaughn's a dick, so I wonder if he even let the wife know when he'd be there. I tend to think not. It was quite telling that just last week, he criticized her for being bubbly, yet this week he tells Dr Sex that's one of the things he loves about her. I'm so tired of his waffling and contradicting himself. I'm so over her and her TMI about her wanting her man to dig her panties out of her crack (I've been married a very long time and I'd never want my hubby to do that, or even notice I had a wedgie, but then that's just me.) and now him helping her pee between cars. What kind of situation would necessitate her needing to do that? I don't really want to know or hear about it.

 

What are the other two couples waiting on to talk about kids, religion, contraception, etc? They really need to see if those things are in sync now or not as those are the types of things that if they differ greatly, the higher the odds they won't make it.

[ChristmasJones]

I am addicted to this show, and wish they would follow them until they break-up, or for at least a year, whichever is longer.

 

Note to producers who may be reading: find more couples and make more seasons of this show!

 

Its completely awesome.

[ketose]

I am addicted to this show, and wish they would follow them until they break-up, or for at least a year, whichever is longer.

 

Note to producers who may be reading: find more couples and make more seasons of this show!

 

Its completely awesome.

Good news. The show is already renewed for season 2 and they are filming the reunion show next week. That should be about 5 months since the marriage. I have a good feeling Jamie and Doug are still together. I'm not sure about Cortney and Jason.

[trimthatfat]

It boggles my mind that in this day and age, a couple can be sexually active and not discuss contraception or the possibility of children. Courtney and Jason lose points for that.

[PityFree]

You would think that the things that the "experts" had matched them on would have included things like preferences for CHILDREN, RELIGION, ETC. But then again, with that group of experts, who knows? 

[MsPH]

I hope Cortney and Jason have at least been using a condom, if they haven't had any proper discussion about contraception. Would kind of suck if Jason just assumed she was on the pill and she assumed they're ready to have babies whenever. They certainly aren't anywhere near ready as long as she's in that much debt. Perhaps it's because they like each other so much that they're scared to bring up any topic that might turn out to be a dealbreaker. Then again, they were matched by so called experts, so you'd think their hopes for the future would line up by default. Still have to start discussing things.

 

Monet and Vaugh are so frustrating! It's like half a step forward, two steps back. At this point I'm not even sure who to blame more. I definitely think she should've spent time with her friends while he was away, unless of course she didn't know when he'd be coming back, but that would be a bit strange. They just don't have much time together to begin with, so might as well take advantage of it for the few weeks they're stuck with each other. Then again Vaugh lost me by calling her dog annoying. I understand that not everyone loves dogs, but it's such a contrast to Doug, who seems to love Jamie's dog and was willing to pick up her poop off the floor without any hesitation. How a person treats animals just says a lot about them. I couldn't be with someone who dislikes animals. And Vaugh still doesn't seem to know what he wants or likes. Last week her bubbliness was annoying and now it's what he most likes about her? Yeah right. The easy sex is what he most likes about her and I'm not sure if there's anything else.

 

I was hoping Jamie would be a bit more relaxed by now, but maybe all the sex talk is making her feel pressured, so her guard has gone up again. I definitely have a habit of retreating to my shell when I feel pressured about something. But I doubt she's still a virgin, so freaking out about the fish bowl questions was a bit strange. I hope she can get out of her head soon and let her feelings take over, because she definitely likes Doug. I don't think they should rush into sex, but spooning every night must be hell for poor Doug, since he's so attracted to her.

[KYBlonde]

Vaughn stated that he thought he needed to be paired with an extrovert since he is the opposite. Sorry, Vaughn, but no you do not (as you are now realizing).  The last thing an introvert (I know since I am one) needs is an extrovert.  While it seems to be acceptable to be outgoing and loud, people who are not are usually judged as having emotional problems. Vaughn is finding out that people like Monet are annoying to people like him.  When I was with an extrovert, I was constantly being judged for wanting alone time.  I was called a hermit, unsociable, and a people hater.   Just because I was comfortable with being alone with myself and not needing to hear my own voice yakking constantly, there was something wrong with me.  I am not shy nor socially awkward.  If a person takes the time to get to know me, that is one of the first things they realize about me.  My beloved grandmother (RIP) gave me some really wise advice when I was a child.  She told me that you can find out so much more about people by listening rather than running your mouth and hijacking every conversation and she was right.  I could write several books about the things I know about people (but of course would NEVER do) ;)

[Secret]

I have been all full of advice to the participants on Twitter. I still think Doug & Jamie and Jason & Courtney have a really good chance to make it work. I saw glimmers of potential with Monet & Vaughn, and I know that final scene was apparently chopped up (according to Monet), but they make me so frustrated!

Jason & Courtney have great potential. Courtney is very open, she seems perceptive and sensitive. I just can't believe they have hesitations on such odd topics like birth control or family. I get that Jason Is guarded, but I'm hoping some of that is editing. I see Jason's point - you just met, you should get settled and solid before you have babies. Maybe it's my perspective of having a small child, but while children are awesome, bringing them into the equation can rock the strongest relationship. It is a HUGE stressor. Please don't rush it.

Jamie & Doig seem the most realistic to me, but it may just be relatable to me because I had similar walls up regarding physical intimacy. For Doug's sake, I hope Jamie is really falling for him and not just getting caught up in the confines and forced intimacy of the show. I hear her saying she is afraid of letting him in because she doesn't want to lose him. If she doesn't let him in, she'll guarantee that by pushing him away. It appears obvious that Doug is "smitten", so I hope he doesn't get hurt.

Having said that, for both couples, they seem to be actively avoiding conflict. That can only last so long. I worry how they'll handle arguments and fights. They are bound to happen! Bottling up your feelings isn't healthy.

Which brings me to Monet & Vaughn. They have been through enough conflict for all three couples, combined. I had hope that they would start fresh, but even if that fight at the end was not accurately portrayed, what Vaughn said at the end was maddening. They are both constantly talking about their expectations of marriage, a wife, a husband. If they both had a checklist of requirements in their mate, this was not the right place for them. Vaughn especially seems to be keeping score and keeps referring to losing. If they could just listen to each other, they would have a chance, but I fear it is a lost cause because they have no trust in each other.

[trimthatfat]

Vaughn stated that he thought he needed to be paired with an extrovert since he is the opposite. Sorry, Vaughn, but no you do not (as you are now realizing).  The last thing an introvert (I know since I am one) needs is an extrovert. 

 

I am an extreme introvert married to an extrovert. I couldn't be married to another introvert. I'd be miserable. When it comes to introvert/extrovert pairings, there are a lot of shades of gray. I think there is a lot more playing into Money and Vaughn's issues than the introvert/extrovert pairing.

 

Since Monet tweeted about the argument shown not reflecting what really happened and that we will find out what was really happening next week, I'm going to reserve my opinion on their argument until next week's episode. Monet, however, was right when she said Vaughn is inconsistent. He said he found her need to be bubbly and talk annoying and then he claims he loves that about her. Like...what? Choose one thing and stick to it - stop flip-flopping. That would drive me crazy if I were Monet.

 

As far as Doug and Jamie's intimacy issues are concerned, I don't really see their problem. Jamie seems like the type who prefers to have sex within a committed, nurturing relationship. Doug seems okay with that. IMO, that's great. It's a refreshing change from the constant hook-ups I used to see on the Real World where people were swapping bodily fluids with whoever shows even a teeny-bit of interest.

 

IDK about Courtney and Jason. I still think they are the best matched, but I am a little concerned that they won't discuss serious issues until they absolutely have to. It almost seems like Courtney is afraid to bring certain topics to Jason for discussion. I also think that if the previews are any indication where Jason doesn't seem comfortable with meeting Courtney's family, that she will just accept that and not feel comfortable voicing her opinion on the matter.

[Ohwell]

Vaughn is finding out that people like Monet are annoying to people like him.  When I was with an extrovert, I was constantly being judged for wanting alone time.  I was called a hermit, unsociable, and a people hater.   Just because I was comfortable with being alone with myself and not needing to hear my own voice yakking constantly, there was something wrong with me.  I am not shy nor socially awkward.  If a person takes the time to get to know me, that is one of the first things they realize about me.

Same with me.  I've always been more of a listener than a talker.  If I were a guy, Monet's constant yakking would get on my nerves, having to live with her day in and day out.  I really think she's a sweet person, but she needs to be with someone who appreciates her bubbliness.  Vaughn says he does, and I think he could deal with it if they were just friends.  I just don't think he can deal with it in a wife. 

 

I also don't think it's a big deal just because someone doesn't like animals (which is a whole different thing than someone who mistreats animals).  Vaughn didn't mistreat the dog; he just doesn't want to be bothered with it, and I can understand that.  Some of my friends just don't like the idea of pet hair, walking the dog, vet bills, etc.  Them not liking animals doesn't in any way mean that they aren't nice, caring people.  I'm also one of those people but I still think I'm likeable enough. :)

 

Also, I don't mean for Doug to go all macho or anything like that, but I wish he would grow a pair.  I'm tired of him moping around her, drooling, like he's waiting to pick up her poop on the floor, just like the dog's.  If he hasn't already, he needs to have an open, honest conversation with Jamie about where she really thinks the relationship is headed.   I'm not even talking about sex at this point because I can understand if she wants to wait (although I do not need to hear any more about his blue balls).  I don't care how much she bats those false eyelashes at him, I get the feeling she's dragging this out, knowing full well that he will never be what she really wants, no matter how nice he is. 

Edited August 13, 2014 by Ohwell

[absolutelyido]

It was quite telling that just last week, he criticized her for being bubbly, yet this week he tells Dr Sex that's one of the things he loves about her. I'm so tired of his waffling and contradicting himself.

 

I think Vaughn was outright lying to the Dr. when he said he liked Monet's bubbly personality because he couldn't honestly think of one thing that he actually does like about her, except having sex with her. Speaking of sex, Monet girlfriend, you need to stop having sex with this man because he does not like you. At all.

In Vaughn's defense about the cooking, he did say that if they were at his apartment, he would have been cooking for her.

 

I think Vaughn says a lot of things that aren't true and that is one of them.

Then again Vaughn lost me by calling her dog annoying. I understand that not everyone loves dogs, but it's such a contrast to Doug, who seems to love Jamie's dog and was willing to pick up her poop off the floor without any hesitation. How a person treats animals just says a lot about them.

 

Amen. Doug is the kind of guy who lets things roll off his back. Vaughn is the kind of guy who gets irked by every little thing that is not exactly to his liking. It seems like right away Doug treated Lady as 'their' dog, but Vaughn still sees PJ as Monet's dog. I think how a man treats an animal particularly shows how they would be with children. Doug would be the husband who would tell Jamie to go back to bed because it's his turn to walk the floor with their colicky baby at 2AM. Vaughn would complain to Monet about why she can't get the kid to stop crying because he's got to get up and go to work in the morning, even though she had to go to work as well.

Jamie and Courtney are cute, but have they talked about ANYTHING important? Kids, Religion, Future plans?

 

I feel like Jason and Cortney keep having the same superficial conversation over and over. "I really like you, I'm really attracted to you, I'm glad I married you......" They never seem to get beyond that.

 

Maybe it's just me, but Doug keeps getting hotter each episode. I thought he looked particularly good when they were bed shopping and his beard was pretty thick. I think he would look really good if he grew a beard similar to what his brother wears. I thought Doug & Jamie dancing was beyond adorable. Also, the look on the instructors face when Doug said they didn't know each other when they got married was hilarious.

Edited August 13, 2014 by absolutelyido

[Ohwell]

I think Vaughn says a lot of things that aren't true and that is one of them.

The same could be said of Monet.  Who knows?

[ethalfrida]

Not everyone likes animals and when did it become a rule that we all have to? I grew up with dogs and loved everyone one of them dearly. But I do not want any now. I still think puppies and kittens are absolutely adorable but seriously am fine without them in personal space. The person who wrote about Monet talking so much is right on. Monet was not hearing what Vaughn was saying. If she stops fighting and yelling she would probably "hear" whether he is going to be worth staying with. But, geebus, she was annoying. The bottom line is that they all just met and do not know anything about each other; there should be a lot more discussion going on toward sharing goals, finances, family. Although I don't have a problem with their getting intimate right away I think it is the least interesting of their activities. Seeing as there are things edited for the camera it is better to reserve judgement on whether Vaughn is a good guy or not... but what I see is he states his point without aggressiveness while Monet is the opposite. I think she is a doll but she needs to slow it down quite a bit.

 

[Bella]

Pets are good for screening potential love interests. They might even be better than the "experts" on this show. Vaughn doesn't need to be enthusiastic about the dog, but he does need to accept that the dog is part of the package and he'll need to get used to it.  Anyway, at this point that relationship shows no signs of lasting, so Monet is better off with the dog if she's made to choose.

[ethalfrida]

I agree that if he cannot accept the dog he should bail. It clearly is not in his best interest to live in an enviroment that is not satisfactory to him. For sure, if someone judged me on issues like that they would definitely be better with their dog so I agree with that point also. But to be fair to Monet I don't recall her having issues with it one way or another but I could have missed something.

[zxy556575]

Speaking of sex, Monet girlfriend, you need to stop having sex with this man because he does not like you. At all.

 

Except she doesn't like him much, either. I assume she's happy enough using him to get her rocks off.

[ShaNaeNae]

Monet needs to stop talking so much about body parts and such.  First, it was wanting someone to take her panties out of her butt crack.  Tonight, it's Vaughn holding her hand while she pees between two cars.  Not cute, Monet. 

 

 

And next week, her favorite place to be kissed "below the waist".

 

How old is that blond sex doctor? She looks 24 tops.

 

I still like Cortney.  Also surprised to see Jamie so chaste. She didn't have those same issues on Bachelor Pad.

[PityFree]

In my ongoing critique of Cortney's makeup, this episode made me realize that she should do some shading under her chin for better definition of her jawline. 

[Ohwell]

Pets are good for screening potential love interests.

I disagree.  I've been with the same person for 28 years and he doesn't like pets.  It's because he doesn't like the idea of having "pets"; he feels they should be able to run free.  I used to have a dog, and just because it slobbered over a guy I was dating, did not mean that the guy was any better or nicer than the guys who didn't care for the dog.

[Bella]

There are stellar people who don't love pets. But that was very useful for me, because my pets are part of the package, and that's non-negotiable. 

[Adeejay]

At this point, Vaughn isn’t even trying to hide the fact that he can’t stand Monet.  Interestingly, the only thing he “likes” about her (bubbly) is the same thing he complained about.  It doesn’t make sense.  He has no intentions of staying a minute longer with her than he has to.  I believe he has already planned his escape, so all that is left for him to do is present his defense:  she doesn’t cook; she talks too much; she makes him feel uncomfortable; she is not a good communicator; her dog is annoying and she’d rather spend time with her friends.  I think Monet is attractive and she seems nice and kind.  However, I have a feeling that when Vaughn pictured his wife, she wasn’t what he had in mind.

 

I think Jamie likes having Dough around because he makes her feel special and caters to her every whim.  She’s made it clear that it took a lot of hard work and determination for her to get out of the trailer park and that she is never going back.  Jamie wants a handsome, successful husband, and with all due respect, Doug doesn’t fit that description.  I believe she will stay with him after this is over, but only until someone “better” comes along.

 

I hate to say it, but I don't think Courtney and Jason are going to make it. 

[trimthatfat]

How old is that blond sex doctor? She looks 24 tops.

I feel like she looks a lot older than 24.

 

I don't think it's an issue that Vaughn doesn't like dogs, but I found his comment about the dog being 'annoying' very immature. I would love to hear him honestly answer what he likes about Monet because I don't think he likes anything about her - not her personality, not her dog, not the city she lives in, etc. I think he has sex with her because hey, why not?, not because he feels any genuine desire to be with her intimately. I think at this point in the show, it would have been best if they stopped having sex and tried to regroup so they can at least get along somewhat until they can go their separate ways at the end of the project.

 

There are stellar people who don't love pets. But that was very useful for me, because my pets are part of the package, and that's non-negotiable. 

Same. When I first met my husband, I had just adopted a dog who (despite me not being a fan of dogs in general) stole my heart. I told him that the dog was my princess and if they didn't get along, one of them was going to have to go. Hint: the one to go would not have been my dog. I didn't want to risk inviting someone into my home who could possibly emotionally or physically abuse my dog. Not to say Vaughn would ever hurt Monet's dog (he doesn't strike me as the type at all), but I think he is going to have to learn to accept her if he is serious about the marriage working (which I don't buy that he is)

Edited August 13, 2014 by trimthatfat

[MsPH]

Yes, I totally agree that not everyone has to love or want pets. I've had none since I moved out of my childhood home either and I appreciate the tidiness. But if a potential love interest had pets or absolutely wanted them, then I certainly wouldn't hold that against them in any way, because pets are like family members to most people, and if you love someone you need to accept things that are important to them. If Vaughn is at all serious about making things work with Monet, then he's gonna have to adopt a more positive attitude towards the dog, because it's not going anywhere. Calling it annoying just shows his negativity once again. Have we even heard that dog bark? Doubt it sheds much hair either since it's tiny.

 

I have to admit I do side eye people who actively dislike animals, not just in the pet sense, because how boring would this world be with just people in it? If a cute furry thing moves nothing in you, then it's hard for me not to judge at all. Even worse if you think humans are above all other species. But I'm not saying Vaughn is an animal hater or anything. After all it was just one comment, even if it did rub me the wrong way. 

[Soobs]

In my opinion, one of the most important aspects in terms of making a marriage work is cooperation. Some couples are doing it better than others. Vaughn and Monet are terrible at it. I thought it was rude of Monet to invite her friends without asking Vaughn what he wanted, especially since he'd been out of town. But then Vaughn didn't help his case by ticking off all the perceived sacrifices he's made. They both don't seem to understand that you have to give to the other person what you want from them and then when the other person feels how nice that is, hopefully they want to give it back. They are locked in this territorial dance and are both defensive a lot of the time. It's no fun to watch and I'm sure less fun to participate in.

 

I wasn't sure what Jason and Courtney were talking about when they were talking about birth control. Does she want to get off it or change it? Obviously, they are using something because Jason has been pretty clear he's not even ready to talk about kids. They seem to be pretty compatible but I was wondering what the hell they talk about when they hang out? I felt like I've had more intimate conversations with random strangers at parties than these two have had. They just seem really young to me.

 

I still like Jamie and Doug the best and I feel they have the best shot as they seem compatible, attracted to each other and the most mature out of all the couples. I wonder if they've been doing other things and just have not had intercourse. I can't imagine spooning every night with someone you really like and are attracted to and not doing at least a little more than kissing and holding hands.

[ExMathMajor]

Maybe it's just me, but Doug keeps getting hotter each episode. I thought he looked particularly good when they were bed shopping and his beard was pretty thick. I think he would look really good if he grew a beard similar to what his brother wears. I thought Doug & Jamie dancing was beyond adorable. Also, the look on the instructors face when Doug said they didn't know each other when they got married was hilarious.

 

It's definitely not just you. After this episode I said to the screen, "Jamie, if you don't take him, I will!" even though technically I'm old enough to be his (very young) mother, lol.

 

Also, I realized that even though we're not quite as close physically and communications-wise -- I talk to my mom maybe once a week and my dad maybe once every two weeks and my sisters somewhere in the middle -- my family's very close in the sense that we're always there for each other. I like that aspect of Doug's family. Jamie could be missing out on a real opportunity to know that kind of love and security. (I saw that little spoiler at the top of the thread but am ignoring it...)

 

Not everyone likes animals and when did it become a rule that we all have to? I grew up with dogs and loved everyone one of them dearly. But I do not want any now. I still think puppies and kittens are absolutely adorable but seriously am fine without them in personal space.

 

Next month marks three years since my cat-friend of 15 years passed away. I haven't gone this long without some kind of four-legged companion since I was 7...and I'm not in any hurry to get anything bigger than a fish anytime soon. Now that said:

 

There are stellar people who don't love pets. But that was very useful for me, because my pets are part of the package, and that's non-negotiable. 

 

Completely agree, and that's how it should be IMO. Monet doesn't need another reason to walk, but that snide comment Vaughan made about her dog is a pretty good one. I really can't find much else to say about them except I hope they get some kind of redemptive arc at some point.

 

Finally, Cortney and Jason are still cute as hell. I can't imagine what their babies would look like though.

[Ohwell]

Maybe Monet yapping and the little dog yapping are just too much for Vaughn.  Vaughn could perhaps like the dog if the dog wasn't with Monet.  Seriously though, I do know some people--ok, guys-- who like dogs--just not the little yappng ones.  

[Bandolero]

Monet and Vaughn

I have to stick up for Vaughn a bit here. I know he is not perfect by any stretch but I too find Monet to be a bit much. A bit too quick to anger, too loud, etc. That sort of disapproving condescending “schoolmarm”  voice that she uses when she speaks to Vaughn can be very off-putting. Telling a man that he is not fully a man yet is a huge no-no and it is not something that a man soon forgets. There are some places you just should not go even if you are angry. Vaughn was in the military, has his own place, has a job, does not have any children… what makes him not a man? I don’t get it. He seems really responsible and put together to me.

 

On the other hand, Vaughn also seems sort of closed off and stiff and seems like the type who retreats and shuts down when things get too much for him. He would be better suited to a woman who is a bit less fiery.

 

Informing your man when he walks in the door  that your girlfriends are coming over that very same evening… after he has been away for two days… Just no. That is something that would annoy the heck out of me and I consider myself to be very reasonable.

I understand that these couples are supposedly married but they have only been together for a couple of weeks and trying to force things when both parties don’t even know what the outcome of these relationships are going to be seems a  bit coo-coo. If I had only known a man for two weeks, I would not be trying to push him to meet my friends… it is too soon. At this point, they should be all about getting to know each other.

In the same vein, Courtney talking about having babies when she barely knows this man is also pretty crazy. Not wanting to be on birth control… Really!!!

 

I think Monet is very cute and obviously intelligent but Vaughn wanted a traditional relationship and a woman who does not cook is a huge turn off for a man like that. I think Vaughn was sincere in wanting a relationship based on traditional gender roles but I don’t know about Monet. She seems too independent, modern and strong willed for that. Not that there is anything wrong with that but it just does not work with a man who wants to be “head” of the family, catered to, etc. My parents have a very traditional marriage… and it works for them as they’ve been married over 40yrs but probably would not have worked if both didn’t “play their roles” so to speak.

 

That said… it is just hard watching those two… there is no affection, playfulness or like there. They don’t even touch. It’s obviously a bust. It just goes to show that physical chemistry/physical attraction isn’t everything. They both seem like good people… just not a good match.

Courtney and Jason

Seem to be in infatuation mode... hope all that passion lasts when they come down. We are told over and over how he takes care of his mother but when is that? He seems to work a lot, goes to the gym, wrestles, goes to school to be an EMT and is doing this show. Doesn’t seem like there is a lot of time left for Mama. No judgment… just curious about this.

 

Jamie and Doug

I would really like to see the real Doug. I could be wrong but he always seems to be sort of “on” and playing that “I wuv her” sort of puppy dog role. They both seem to be playing up the cutesiness thing a bit too much. Has Doug ever said what he values in a woman as in character traits? I get it… Jamie is beautiful but I wonder if he is really taking the time to determine if this is the woman for him vs continually trying to show her how worthy he is of her. The way Jamie acted in the beginning would be a huge red flag for me personally… she totally dissed him based solely on his looks… she acted like he had some sort of contagious disease that she did not want to catch. It is one thing to not be attracted to somebody or to find them unattractive but the way she treated him was appalling. She could have chosen to be kind… that speaks to someone’s character. Anyway… I like that they are taking things slow and really taking the time to get to know each other without all of the forced intimacy of the other two couples. I truly wish them the best.

 

We keep hearing how people have their guard up… BUT they agreed to come on this show and give it a shot. If they are truly so guarded then this show is probably the last thing they should be doing cause for it to work both parties need to be willing to be open, authentic and vulnerable.

 

 

[ketose]

The one thing I would cut Jamie (and Doug) on is that they have known each other for two weeks. That's 14 days. And Jamie has been working for about half of them. She probably has to do extra shifts because of all the time she's taking off for a wedding, a mini honeymoon and now the trip to her old trailer park. If they were dating, two weeks wouldn't be a huge amount of time to wait.

 

One of the funny thing about this show is that they aren't squeamish about letting us know when each couple breaks the seal. If you look at The Bachelor, there was a big deal about how the one guy revealed that the woman (the Bachelorette, I think) slept with him during the show and she got really indignant about him announcing it. With MAFS, the attitude seems to be "it's okay to have sex because you're married," even if they are total strangers.

 

I think Doug is playing it as cool as possible with Jamie because she might give in if he pressured her into sex, but it would blow up the relationship.

[Ohwell]

Telling a man that he is not fully a man yet is a huge no-no and it is not something that a man soon forgets. There are some places you just should not go even if you are angry. Vaughn was in the military, has his own place, has a job, does not have any children… what makes him not a man? I don’t get it. He seems really responsible and put together to me.

Oh yes, I forgot about the "not fully a man" part.  That was cruel of her to say.  If a guy had told me that I "wasn't fully a woman," I would have turned the car around, gone back to "our" place, and gotten as much stuff I could put in my car, and gone back to my place.  Then go back and get the rest of my shit the next day.

[absolutelyido]

Jamie wants a handsome, successful husband, and with all due respect, Doug doesn’t fit that description.  I believe she will stay with him after this is over, but only until someone “better” comes along.

 

 

I think Jamie has made it pretty clear Doug wasn't her "type", but I think her problem in the past was that she was going for the very handsome, successful type and they ended up not treating her very well. Or, maybe they just couldn't get past her heavy load of emotional baggage. I think Doug is exactly the guy she has wanted, just in a slightly different package. She mentioned a couple of times how great his body is, so I think that has helped make him more physically attractive to her.

 

There's a saying that women are attracted to the men they fall in love with, and men fall in love with the women they are attracted to. I think that's pretty true of Jamie and Doug. He's obviously been amazingly patient and supportive of her, but I wonder if he would have tried so hard if he hadn't found her so attractive.

 

Regarding Vaughn's complaints about moving to Monet's, the lack of space she gave him, and her dog he said that he had "swallowed" all these things. I feel like he's never told Monet that these things irritate him. She said that he's angry all the time, and I don't think she can quite figure out why because he's never told her these things make him angry.

Edited August 14, 2014 by absolutelyido

[outtosee]

JAMIE. We get it. Doug is not your type. I'm sorry, but I can't stand her. If you're so vulnerable and have a wall up that is so freaking impenetrable, why did you go on a reality show wherein you marry someone you met an hour beforehand? She is exhausting. And Doug isn't my type either, but slap a beard on him and he's kinda hot! He's got a great body. 

 

Courtney also annoys me. I get the feeling that she wants kids ASAP. Slow your roll. And how do two young, vibrant people in their 20s in 2014 NOT discuss birth control? I hope they're at least using condoms...

Edited August 14, 2014 by outtosee

[meatball77]

Vaugn and Monet seem to just detest eachother (except sexually).  It's stupid at this point for them to not have just walked away (although I figure they can't).  So they have the same arguments over again.  Vaugn is upset that Monet isn't a simpering helpmeet of a wife and Monet isn't happy that Vaugn isn't a modern man who will take care of her in a modern way, respecting her as a woman.  They really did a horrible job matching those two up. 

 

What I hate is the implication that Monet needs to change to make Vaugn happy when the real advice should be to cut and run.

[ramble]

I would really like to see the real Doug. I could be wrong but he always seems to be sort of “on” and playing that “I wuv her” sort of puppy dog role.

That's pretty close to how I feel as well & why I'm not warming up to Doug as quickly as others seem to be. I feel like he's playing the character of Doug more than himself. Speaking of Doug, good grief let the ball game go! How many times will we hear about the importance of Jamie missing the ball game? She had to work doofus! Tell your family to shut up & be glad she has a job or you'd all be living with mom & dad. I understand this show is different & Jamie may have changed, I hope she has, but after seeing her have sex with Chris on Bachelor Pad I find this whole thing pretty giggle worthy. Granted the sex was implied & not actually shown but she was willing to imply in a twin bed in a room full of folks & it's not like she'd dated Chris for years. Still I tend to like her for some reason.

Monet & Vaughn may be perfectly nice people apart from one other but together they are uncomfortable & seem to be completely unhappy. Good sex can only hold them for so long before the parts they dislike about each other will override it all. I feel like we're pretty much at that tipping point. I wish they'd set them free early.

Courtney & Jason are definitely in early stage lust-like & are cute. I'm not sure what they aren't discussing but I got the impression he doesn't like talking about certain topics on camera. I do like these two but I can't shake the niggling suspicion that they're looking for tv exposure for their secondary careers. I'm jaded.

What do we get to thank FYI & the experts for educating us about this week? Intimacy. That ain't just sex y'all. It's talking & sharing & pulling dumb ass questions out of a fishbowl. Wow now I know why my relationships don't work. I don't have a fishbowl full of intimacy building questions & I haven't asked a guy to talk about his feeling a lot, in depth, over & over. I bet guys love that! If only if known. Thanks MaFS I'm signing up for every dating site I can find now because I know I'll find The One. "Hi I'm Ramble. Nice to meet you. Tell me how you feel about true love, do you believe in a soul mate? What about children & birth control? How comfortable are you with family involvement? What's your opinion on sex in marriage? We should talk about money & long term financial goals. Also, do you like pets? Wait! Where are you going? I still have a list of 19 other questions in my purse. I didn't have a fishbowl. F'ing bitch? No I said Fish. Bowl. Come back.....

[aradia22]

Jason and Courtney are adorable. 
 

I still feel like Jamie is just going along with things and keeping herself apart from Doug as much as possible so she can handle having to do this. That said, with a doctor in the family I get not being able to reschedule and it was wrong of Doug's family to expect her to take time off (especially after presumably taking time off for the wedding and honeymoon) to go to a softball game.

 

Monet and Vaughn are painful to watch. They both say nasty, hurtful things. But I continue to find the experts' attempts to rationalize everything hilarious. If Cilona comes back we should ask him the specifics of how Vaughn and Monet were compatible in almost every way.

 

 

Doug and Jamie have the problem that they are like regular people and aren't two hamsters who have sex just because they were put in the same cage.

LOL.

 

Then again Vaugh lost me by calling her dog annoying. I understand that not everyone loves dogs, but it's such a contrast to Doug, who seems to love Jamie's dog and was willing to pick up her poop off the floor without any hesitation. How a person treats animals just says a lot about them. I couldn't be with someone who dislikes animals.

Agreed. I've had conversations about pets and kids on first dates. Not in a weird way but if someone casually mentions that they don't like animals or they don't want to have children those can be red flags if those things are important to you.

[NoWhammies]

Enough about the damn softball game, Doug's family. GTF over it already. She is a nurse. She has to work. It is a work schedule. People need baby nurses all days of the year - regardless of whether it is Easter, Christmas, or softball. Have they never had anyone in the family who has to work in jobs with non-traditional hours? My husband has a job that he often winds up having to work on Christmas, Thanksgiving, and other holidays. It happens. My family has never once harped on it in all the years of our marriage, yet Jamie and Doug have been "married" for two weeks and they're all over it. 

 

Vaughn - you are a douche. Nothing I've seen thus far changes my opinion.

[StayingAfterSunday]

I believe Monet is trying to imitate friends of hers and the way they do things. To hear her talk you'd think she and Vaughn had been together for years, not weeks, hence her wanting to have a "girls night' when he just returned from Jersey.  She is NOT as independent and her "own person" as she'd like to pretend.  Everything she does seems inauthentic, as though she's trying to be someone else. This smacks of a woman who has no idea who she, herself, really is. 

In her defense, I think another reason she wanted to do the girls night while Vaughn was present was she'd like to show him off to the girls.  Of course, she'll never admit that.  Despite Monet telling Ms Expert that she and Vaughn are not in love, she obviously likes the way he looks.  And, admittedly, the man is handsome. But I keep coming back to that part of Monet who doesn't know herself, and tries to model herself after her friends, cousin, etc. etc., many of whom have been with the same guy for probably half their lives where it would be no big deal to have their girls over when their man is there, too. 

[StayingAfterSunday]

As for Jason and Cortney:  Jason always seems as though he is scared to death.  The sex  questions posed to both of them by the blonde "expert" elicited a reaction from Jason that suggested he has old-fashioned notions about this type of personal probing.  As he told a friend back in episode one or two, guys shouldn't "kiss and tell."  
Also,  Jason has a young way about him and looks frightened much of the time whereas i wonder if an event of cataclysmic proportion could stir Cortney from her calm, composed demeanor.  I really think Jason never expected to be chosen for this "experiment" and, while he is tickled to death to have found Cortney, he is still not sure what to do henceforth.