Homespun Marketing: Local Commercials

[frenchtoast]

Ask, or hint, and ye shall receive. Especially since local commercials can be so terrifically awful. 

[Brattinella]

I will be back soon, gonna go youtube hunting!

[RubyWoo72]

@frenchtoast, grab a fly-swatter:

Folks (of a Certain Age) from So Cal will remember this:

[Rick Kitchen]

Go see Cal, go see Cal, go see Cal.

Actually, @RubyWoo72 that Cal ad was from his Sacramento dealership.  Ol' Cal got around.  :)

Has anybody seen the Chuck Testa ad?

 

[Brattinella]

Chuck Testa ad is wonderful!  Thanks for posting!

 

I was trying to post a local ad, but it wouldn't paste the link.  Will keep trying!

[bilgistic]

"Chuck Testa does not taxidermize pets." Well, who the hell are you going to go to, if not Chuck Testa, FFS? He's clearly the best!

That was GOLD! From the very beginning with the lifeless animals "moving" to the very end with the disclaimer...perfection. THAT is how you advertise, Apple!

[RubyWoo72]

Go see Cal, go see Cal, go see Cal.

Actually, @RubyWoo72 that Cal ad was from his Sacramento dealership. Ol' Cal got around. :)

Yep. Set up shop in Long Beach and Snoop does the drops for him on local radio stations now. He certainly was a prolific advertiser.

Has anybody seen the Chuck Testa ad?

[bilgistic]

A local dealership has been running these corny commercials for 20-plus years. My college roommate grew up in the area and told me some lore about them; the commercials used to have a dog and/or a man dressed up as Batman in them (which I do remember from when I first moved here).

She said that the dealership was supposedly a cover for drug-running, and there was a "code" for who showed up in the commercial--Batman would mean a new shipment of cocaine had come in, for example, or the dog would mean heroin. This was supposedly to stay off law enforcement's radar, but they were eventually busted. It sounded highly suspicious to me, and I never found out if it was the truth, but the commercials are different now--no characters other than the reverend, the customer and the "deacons"(?).

Anyway, the commercials are loved locally for how wonderfully terrible they are. Feast your eyes:

Edited August 6, 2014 by bilgistic

[Cobalt Stargazer]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! *wipes tears* The guy's mullet wig is the best part of that ad. I. Cannot. Breathe.

[Portia]

@RubyWoo72 fixed it for me (see next post). Many thanks! My tablet was acting blinky and I didn't think anything had posted.

Edited August 6, 2014 by Portia

[RubyWoo72]

@Portia, I tried to fix it for you.

Edited August 6, 2014 by RubyWoo72

[RubyWoo72]

And did--did he just say his wife's boyfriend broke his jaw with a fence post?

He is keepin it all the way real. Dang.

[riley702]

The shame of Indy. This guy has been going for years. When I first moved here in the early 80s, my intro to Don was a radio ad that was so over the top, I was sure it was a spoof ad. Nope, I was informed, it's serious. It was for a government surplus flamethrower, and it went something like "Neighbor's dog leaving messages in your yard? Light up your prey before you blow it away! Watch the kid's eyes light up when you ignite the grill from 20 feet away!" And his tag line "I don't want to make any money, folks; I just love to sell guns! Haw haw haw" is notorious.

 

 

 

Edited August 6, 2014 by riley702

[RubyWoo72]

The shame of Indy. This guy has been going for years. When I first moved here in the early 80s, my intro to Don was a radio ad that was so over the top, I was sure it was a spoof ad. Nope, I was informed, it's serious. It was for a government surplus flamethrower, and it went something like "Neighbor's dog leaving messages in your yard? Light up your prey before you blow it away! Watch the kid's eyes light up when you ignite the grill from 20 feet away!" And his tag line "I don't want to make any money, folks; I just love to sell guns! Haw haw haw" is notorious.

Is the 702 a shout out to your area code?

And I was crackin up: " I didn't want anything; I just wanted to sing on teevee." Yes, indeed. Lol!

[Portia]

And did--did he just say his wife's boyfriend broke his jaw with a fence post?

He is keepin it all the way real. Dang.

Yup. Cullman Liquidation is everything.

[Rick Kitchen]

The Chuck Testa and Cullman Liquidation ads were both made by the same two guys, named Rhett and Link, who have a YouTube channel.  Besides making commercials, they also do comedy.

[bilgistic]

The Cullman Liquidation commercial was fantastic, so it makes sense that the genius behind the taxidermy commercial made that one, also.

There was a reality show on for a while about a group that repoed or bought foreclosed/junked mobile homes and flipped them for a tidy profit. Cullman Liquidation reminded me of that.

Don from "Don's Gun's" has quite the oversized set of dentures there. Nothing inspires trust in a merchant like big, fake horse teeth gleaming back at you.

Edited August 6, 2014 by bilgistic

[selkie]

Crossposting the William Casey lawyer ad because he really is the godfather of the thread:

 

[cynicat]

Even NYC has crappy local commercials.  I'm particularly fond of Uncle Majic

 

[bilgistic]

Why does he spell his name "Majic", but didn't bother to get the phone number that spelled it the same way?

Why do I think Uncle Majic drives a windowless van, if you get my drift?

[bilgistic]

Here's another local used-car dealership spot (they're low-hanging fruit around here). They don't run this series of commercials anymore, and this one is fairly tame in terms of bizarreness, but I give you one word: puppets. They look like refugees from the nearest children's church horror hour, I mean, "let's learn about Jesus with puppets" hour. Because puppets make everything less creepy.

It should be known that I hadn't seen those commercials in four years, and I could still remember the puppets' jingle so I could look up the commercial. They will take over your soul.

Edited August 7, 2014 by bilgistic

[St. Claire]

Jack Antwerpen of the Baltimore, MD area causes me to twitch whenever I see his commercials. We did buy my husband's car from him, though, which means that I am contributing to the madness.

 

 

 

[riley702]

Is the 702 a shout out to your area code?

And I was crackin up: " I didn't want anything; I just wanted to sing on teevee." Yes, indeed. Lol!

No, my area code is 317. riley-702 is the name and (erstwhile) address of my workplace - Riley Children's Hospital at 702 Barnhill Drive. They've now moved the entrance around to a newly created street named, imaginatively, Riley Hospital Drive. 

[bilgistic]

Jack Antwerpen of the Baltimore, MD area causes me to twitch whenever I see his commercials. We did buy my husband's car from him, though, which means that I am contributing to the madness.

That last one made me want to punch everyone involved in the making of that commercial. I really, really hate that grown-people's-heads-on-babies'-bodies comedy bit. Also, a second car for a dollar? That sounds totally legit.

[Actionmage]

I thank you, Ruby Woo 72, for posting the Chuck Testa ad! I watched Rhett & Link: Commercial Kings pretty religiously on IFC a couple of years back. Chuck's ad was one episode. (It was not an easy shoot, iirc!)

 

Holiday Hotel for Cats: (from Episode 1!)

 

TRASHICORN!!!!

 

and the one that got them on my radar: The Red House!

Edited August 10, 2014 by The Crazed Spruce
Fixed YouTube tags

[smittykins]

No two words strike fear in the hearts of those living in Upstate New York more than these.

 

Billy.  Fuccillo.

 

I can't even use a certain word beginning with "H" in everyday conversation anymore.

[RubyWoo72]

I thank you, Ruby Woo 72, for posting the Chuck Testa ad!

:) That honor goes to @Rick Kitchen.

[pandora spocks]

What do you do when you win a personal injury case in Middle Tennessee with the help of attorney Bart Durham?  Why throw a limbo party, of course!

[xls]

This company always has entertaining adds-staring the same guy.

[xls]

 

Has anybody seen the Chuck Testa ad?

 

Love that!

[bilgistic]

That "Red House" commercial gives me secondhand embarrassment because it's terrible and the place is near where I grew up, but I'd never heard of it. I feel fortunate.

[Moose135]

I live about an hour from Red House furniture now - I may have to check them out, since they are so welcoming!

[bilgistic]

You can go there if you're black OR white!

Do they not realize we have other races in NC?

Edited August 12, 2014 by bilgistic

[Haleth]

I'm not sure if this is a local firm or national, but somebody has been watching too much Game of Thrones.  Oh, the cheese!

[Rick Kitchen]

I wish my last name was Faultless.

[Cobalt Stargazer]

You can go there if you're black OR white!

Do they not realize we have other races in NC?

FWIW, @bilgistic, they do say "all people" at the end of the commercial.. Not that the ad isn't terrible, because it is, but they don't seem to "snub" anyone or whatever.

[bilgistic]

My bad. I got caught up in the black-or-white business.

[emma675]

I'm praying this one is just local to the Dallas area so that no one else has to suffer through it like we do. If I hear this chick screech "ya reeeeeaaall mon-ay" one more time...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L-flr1bn2lY

[Brattinella]

This is really turning into a popular commercial!

[Rick Kitchen]

There's an ad for a local hospital that shows a woman (I don't really know what her position is at the hospital) being baby-nurturing throughout her life, calling babies "little sweetpea".  At the end, she hands a baby to its mother and says, "Isn't she just the sweetest little sweetpea?"  Uh, the baby is wrapped in blue.  Doesn't that mean it's a he?

 

[avecsans]

No two words strike fear in the hearts of those living in Upstate New York more than these.

Billy. Fuccillo.

I can't even use a certain word beginning with "H"

in everyday conversation anymore.

This. What an asshole. The guy is obviously successful and has to be fairly intelligent, you would think, to have so many dealerships. Why, then, does he insist on always sounding so ignorant? Also, I don't know if this is true, but I have heard that he owns dealerships in the Southwestern US where he goes by the name of Billy Fernandez.

[theatremouse]

At the end, she hands a baby to its mother and says, "Isn't she just the sweetest little sweetpea?"  Uh, the baby is wrapped in blue.  Doesn't that mean it's a he?

Gender non-comforming newborn and the hospital lady is supportive? ;)

 

Or, I mean, was it a newborn? Because if not it might've been a generic hospital blanket they're all blue kind of sitch, wherein you just trust the person talking about the infant knows which baby it is, rather than any kind of intentional, gender-based, color-coded shorthand.

Edited August 30, 2014 by theatremouse

[Rick Kitchen]

It was a newborn.  :)

[NYGirl]

Oh my God I am peeing my pants here.  These ads are the funniest things I've every seen.  I wish we had some fun local commercials.

[St. Claire]

Oh my God I am peeing my pants here.  These ads are the funniest things I've every seen.  I wish we had some fun local commercials.

 

Be careful; you may need to go over the the "Commercials That Annoy, Irritate or Outright Enrage" to talk about how you need SAM.

[Rick Kitchen]

There is a local ad for a solar electric company which I absolutely hate.  There are a lot of people who are talking about how they're switching electric companies, but every one of them says, "I flipped them off."  How 12-year-old of you.

[Guest]

Not really homespun, but local does apply.

 

If you play the GA lottery, you to can have a goat that knows karate, flies a fighter jet, breathes fire and craps money.  One of a series...

 

[Prevailing Wind]

I've only seen the one where the fire-breathing goat is a co-pilot & hits the eject button.  I don't understand it.  Is that Michael Anthony Hall playing the drill sergeant?  (I can't find it on YouTube, but some of those goat ads were posted there THREE YEARS ago!)

[Prevailing Wind]

 

Does this dude look like Woody Harrelson on Botox or what?

[Maverick]

 

Does this dude look like Woody Harrelson on Botox or what?

 

 You mean it's not?