S03.E06: Proceed With Caution

[Xebug67]

On 10/4/2021 at 8:20 AM, mamadrama said:

I get where she was coming from, I myself flew back to the US for hyperemisis treatment during my pregnancy, but it's the context that bothers me. She didn't ask Bini, the child's father, she told him. She's taking their child to another country, a place he's not allowed to travel to, and didn't let him have a say in it. 

Remember when Steven was telling Olga that he was going to take their baby back to the US with him while Olga remained in Russia and she didn't have a say in it? 

Especially knowing his sensitivity of having already lost one son and wife.

I do think that Ari wins the internet award for being the most selfish cast member ever on any reality TV show.

She's likely also a runner, just like his first wife, and it comes very easily to her given how she so easily ghosted her husband Leandro who was supposedly the love of her life/soul mate.

[Xebug67]

23 hours ago, Rootbeer said:

For those who are wondering:  according the NIH, a typical surgery in Ethiopia costs $200 and up to $600 in non-medical costs although it appears that those include things like lost wages and travel and accommodations to get to a hospital; none of which apply in this case.  Meanwhile; airfare from Addis Ababa to Newark according to Expedia  starts at around $1200 per person.  Anyone think Ari would be  holding Avi on her lap for the 24+ hour trip or will grandma and grandpa have to pay for a seat for him to fly too?  Don't answer that.

As for health insurance, Ari is 29, so she cannot be on her parents insurance plan.  She is unemployed and has been for well over a year, there is no way she has health insurance from a job.  So, mommy and daddy are paying for Ari to be covered which would also require a separate premium for Avi.  Babies have to be added to their parents' insurance plans within a certain amount of time after they're born.  Insurance doesn't automatically cover kids unless they are newborns.  

BTW, if you're ever in the market for a C-section in Ethiopia, be prepared to fork over $57 because that's the typical fee.  A vaginal birth costs less than 8 bucks if you're strapped for cash.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK333492/

BTW, I once volunteered at a clinic in Kenya about 5 years ago.  We charged patients 2 bucks to see a physician and $15 bucks if they needed surgery.  The two bucks was put towards the surgical cost if they needed it.  That included a night in our clinic where they recovered lying on cots in a tent, nursing care and all medications.  This was cheaper than the local government hospital, but the prices from Ethiopia sound right to me since most people living there couldn't afford to pay what the local hospital charged, hence, the American clinic was a popular choice.  The average local's salary was about 30 bucks a month for working full time.  Let me brag about the fact that I performed some absolutely stellar hysterectomies for 15 bucks while there.

23 hours ago, Rootbeer said:

For those who are wondering:  according the NIH, a typical surgery in Ethiopia costs $200 and up to $600 in non-medical costs although it appears that those include things like lost wages and travel and accommodations to get to a hospital; none of which apply in this case.  Meanwhile; airfare from Addis Ababa to Newark according to Expedia  starts at around $1200 per person.  Anyone think Ari would be  holding Avi on her lap for the 24+ hour trip or will grandma and grandpa have to pay for a seat for him to fly too?  Don't answer that.

As for health insurance, Ari is 29, so she cannot be on her parents insurance plan.  She is unemployed and has been for well over a year, there is no way she has health insurance from a job.  So, mommy and daddy are paying for Ari to be covered which would also require a separate premium for Avi.  Babies have to be added to their parents' insurance plans within a certain amount of time after they're born.  Insurance doesn't automatically cover kids unless they are newborns.  

BTW, if you're ever in the market for a C-section in Ethiopia, be prepared to fork over $57 because that's the typical fee.  A vaginal birth costs less than 8 bucks if you're strapped for cash.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK333492/

BTW, I once volunteered at a clinic in Kenya about 5 years ago.  We charged patients 2 bucks to see a physician and $15 bucks if they needed surgery.  The two bucks was put towards the surgical cost if they needed it.  That included a night in our clinic where they recovered lying on cots in a tent, nursing care and all medications.  This was cheaper than the local government hospital, but the prices from Ethiopia sound right to me since most people living there couldn't afford to pay what the local hospital charged, hence, the American clinic was a popular choice.  The average local's salary was about 30 bucks a month for working full time.  Let me brag about the fact that I performed some absolutely stellar hysterectomies for 15 bucks while there.

Ari was totally lying to Bini about going back to the U.S. being cheaper for the baby's surgery than having it done in Ethiopia.  The baby needing surgery is the excuse Ari's been waiting for to use as a reason to leave Ethiopia.

Since we all know that Ari doesn't work, I couldn't understand what type of insurance she has.  Can parents really add a full grown adult who is not their dependent to their own insurance policies, as well as her child, or could she possibly have been referring to perhaps having state-funded free medical care for herself and the baby?

[hookedontv]

21 minutes ago, Xebug67 said:

She does like to talk a good game though, like when she said what she said to Leandro about everyone loving the little guy.  She's said similar things on other occasions as well, and when she says those things it always comes across as dispassionately and objectively, as opposed to someone who is a doting mother.

Ari loves Avi like I love my favorite necklace. Makes me feel good when someone compliments me on it, but when I don't have it on, I don't give it a second thought. 

[Xebug67]

22 hours ago, Cini said:

I think if her father has a group policy for his practice, they could have Ari covered as an employee. She may be run as a  consultant or some such thing.

We probably all agree that she is not paying for whatever insurance she has.  She is selfish and immature. I don’t like Bini any better though, he’s a user. 

You just reminded me.  In the very first episode that Ari ever appeared in on her previous season of "The Other Way" didn't we see her pretending to do some kind of office work in her father's office inside their house?  I remember her earliest scene of her climbing down a flight of stairs after being in his office.  So she might be covered as an "employee" then.

[Xebug67]

29 minutes ago, hookedontv said:

Ari loves Avi like I love my favorite necklace. Makes me feel good when someone compliments me on it, but when I don't have it on, I don't give it a second thought. 

Absolutely brilliant and on point analogy, Hookedontv!

[anoninrva]

30 minutes ago, Xebug67 said:

You just reminded me.  In the very first episode that Ari ever appeared in on her previous season of "The Other Way" didn't we see her pretending to do some kind of office work in her father's office inside their house?  I remember her earliest scene of her climbing down a flight of stairs after being in his office.  So she might be covered as an "employee" then.

You think she may be their Vlogger on staff?

[Mahamid Frauded Me]

So Ari's parents are paying her bills so lets see

Average cost of apartment - theirs is low at best so say 300 US, Cost for nanny anywhere from 100-200 US per month - plus internet/food/diapers. So I am guessing that her parents are shelling out at least 1000 a month, much cheaper then rent in NJ for sure. Its probably is about the same amount the family Kenny spends in Kleenex monthly

[readheaded]

1 hour ago, Xebug67 said:

Ari was totally lying to Bini about going back to the U.S. being cheaper for the baby's surgery than having it done in Ethiopia.  The baby needing surgery is the excuse Ari's been waiting for to use as a reason to leave Ethiopia.

Since we all know that Ari doesn't work, I couldn't understand what type of insurance she has.  Can parents really add a full grown adult who is not their dependent to their own insurance policies, as well as her child, or could she possibly have been referring to perhaps having state-funded free medical care for herself and the baby?

They could add her if her father has bought insurance for his medical practice employees, but not if he's got insurance through an employer, which would end when she was 26.

She may have also bought a Marketplace policy for her and Avi.

I'm not sure that she'd be able to get Medicaid coverage. Even if she met the means test, she'd have to be a CT resident and I'm not sure she meets that standard.

[1011101010001]

51 minutes ago, readheaded said:

They could add her if her father has bought insurance for his medical practice employees, but not if he's got insurance through an employer, which would end when she was 26.

She may have also bought a Marketplace policy for her and Avi.

I'm not sure that she'd be able to get Medicaid coverage. Even if she met the means test, she'd have to be a CT resident and I'm not sure she meets that standard.

Aren’t they in NJ?

[hookedontv]

10 minutes ago, MrBuhBye said:

Aren’t they in NJ?

Yes. Princeton. Which Ari clearly did not attend. 

[JocelynCavanaugh]

People on reddit are saying that NJ has a program where Ari can be on her parents’ insurance until age 31 and her baby could be added to that. There are probably several ways she could be insured here — I’m not too concerned about whether that’s true or how.

I think the more salient point is whether it’s actually more affordable to bring the baby to America vs. having surgery done in Addis Ababa. If the numbers people are coming up with are true, there’s no question it’s cheaper to stay there. Not to mention, it’s probably a lot safer to have a routine procedure done locally than to drag an infant on commercial airlines during a pandemic. Ari and Avi both came out of the emergency C-section okay; it’s not like the Ethiopian medical system is all witch doctors and saliva poultices. Ari is lying, lazily, as usual.

As much as I dislike her, I’m not super concerned about her demeanor toward the kid. She doesn’t seem to be having constant anxiety over/around him, which is good. There are plenty of adults around to help care for him, and there probably would be here, too. Ari may have had some trouble bonding with him because of the traumatic way he was born, but she hasn’t abandoned or neglected him. (Whether her reaction to the C-section was appropriate or not, it was clearly authentic.)

Ari’s profound unlikability makes it easier to criticize her, but some of the expectations on her are unfair. She gets called out for never having a job (not progressive enough), but also for not performing motherhood “correctly” (not traditional enough). She’s been sufficiently overprotective and obnoxious about Avi on several occasions. I don’t mind not being subjected to baby talk and sloppily kissing sounds and other Mommy Porn footage that lazy TV producers love to fill time with. 

[lightninggirl]

29 minutes ago, JocelynCavanaugh said:

As much as I dislike her, I’m not super concerned about her demeanor toward the kid. She doesn’t seem to be having constant anxiety over/around him, which is good. There are plenty of adults around to help care for him, and there probably would be here, too. Ari may have had some trouble bonding with him because of the traumatic way he was born, but she hasn’t abandoned or neglected him. (Whether her reaction to the C-section was appropriate or not, it was clearly authentic.)

Ari’s profound unlikability makes it easier to criticize her, but some of the expectations on her are unfair. She gets called out for never having a job (not progressive enough), but also for not performing motherhood “correctly” (not traditional enough). She’s been sufficiently overprotective and obnoxious about Avi on several occasions. I don’t mind not being subjected to baby talk and sloppily kissing sounds and other Mommy Porn footage that lazy TV producers love to fill time with. 

I completely agree with all of this. She was very attached to Avi from birth, and she surprised me by breastfeeding him and being very protective of him. Even if she pulled off the breastfeeding for a few weeks she gave him a good immunity boost and also would have bonded with him further. Unfortunately, she is terribly unlikable and also selfish and I think that trickles down to the appearances/perception of her mothering. I know that these episodes are edited for both time and content, so with what the producers are showing us I'm not concerned with Avi at all. He's got a little village behind him and he'll do just fine.

[lilysmom]

5 hours ago, Xebug67 said:

Steven is the epitome of an a**hat.  He will never NOT be an embarrassment to Alina.  Alina strikes me as someone who will grow into an elegant, refined, articulate, smart woman.  Steven will always be a backwards, spastic, uneducated, uncouth freak.  I really hope that this is one of the couples that DON'T work out.  I want to see Alina free of him and his double standard, lying, sneaky, snaky, duplicitous ways and back home with her mother and grandmother.  Let her go on to university to get her degree in that incredibly interesting field she mentioned, and let Steven go back to selling bug spray.  These two are SO mismatched!

Fair weather Ellie loves Victor so much that she flew there to permanently live with him, but after seeing the devastation on his island she's now completely unsure that she can go through with staying there to rebuild and is ready to give up on their plans to run a bar business together.  So much for "for better or for worse".  I, on the other hand, would not have given him a second chance after the cheating mistress tattled on themselves to Ellie.  And she seriously needs to stop saying she gave up everything to go to him, because as we all know she gave up NOTHING.  This was just a dry run test to her, and the island (and Victor) flunked it.

Ari is yet another duplicitous, dishonest, suspicious, sneaky, back stabbing heifer.  The hospital and medical staff where she gave birth were good enough according to her mom, so she was fine about giving birth in Ethiopia.  Why then the need to go back to the U.S. other than it being nothing more than an EXCUSE for her to justify leaving the country with the baby and misrepresenting her reasons for leaving as being for the good of their baby.  I for one would never be someone who wants to live in some third world country that doesn't have any of the superficial amenities that developed countries like the U.S. and Great Britain have - primarily air conditioning and safe water to drink and refrigerators that make ice, to name but a few.  As spoiled as she is, I can relate to her wanting to go back to the U.S.  She just never should have done Bini this way.  Then again, Bini's the idiot that has gotten himself into this same situation twice in a row now.  The guy just can't/won't learn his lesson about NOT impregnating American women.  I do believe, however, that Bini is sincerely in love with that pig snout, perpetual smelled a fart faced Ari, and he clearly adores his baby, as do the aunts who have always been able to see through Ari for who she really is.

Every time that Kenny makes a snarky comment about Armando's sweet dad not committing to attending their wedding, I want to bitch slap him across his face.  That man seems to have made significant strides in a very short time to accept his son's life choices and choice of partner after what was probably a lifetime of being unfamiliar (at least first hand) with their lifestyle.  Good on him for showing his son all that love, as well as being so gracious to Kenny's daughter.  Kenny needs to back off and not shite all over Armando's happiness about the strides he HAS definitively made with his dad.  Everyone does not come around at the same time or in the same way.  The father is not expressing or exhibiting any prejudice towards Kenny or about their relationship, nor is the rest of Armando's immediate family.  That is HUGE to Armando.  Kenny seems to not want Armando to be hurt by his dad's possible non-attendance at their wedding, and purports not to want to burst his happiness bubble, yet he can't control himself and has to still make some type of comment on the way back to their place in the car when they left Armando's family's compound.  Deal with that situation IF it ever comes about instead of unnecessarily dwelling on it now and constantly complaining and finding unnecessary things to complain about.  Thus far this supposedly very conservative man has acted very progressively, albeit subtly so.

Jenny and Sumit wear me out.  All they ever do is have the exact same conversations with the only difference in those conversations being that they occur on different days - but the subject matter is always the same.  'Why won't your parents accept me, Sumit?'  'Why can't I come with you, Sumit?'  'I'm going to have to leave the country, Sumit.'  'When will you marry me, Sumit?'  'I love you more than anyone, Sumit.'  Yada, yada, yada.  I'm living for the moving in of the parents and what will probably be 24/7 insults and belittling of Jenny.

Great post! I couldn't have said it better! But you really need to learn to say what is on your mind!!   LOL

Do you remember the first time we met Ari. Her biggest thing to brag about was that she was going to have her BAE BE in EthioPYA. At the time, it was exotic and important to her to let everyone know that. Now, the same baby needs surgery and it becomes an excuse to leave the country. IMO she won't return. Bini will not have the financial resources to fight her. Besides his second son, he will lose the fancy apartment and lifestyle to which he has become accustomed.

Also, did anyone else think it was small of Kenny after watching the scene between his daughter and Papa Armando with the necklace to say, "Where's MY necklace?" I think he is so self centered, he can't stand to have anyone else in the spotlight for even a second. To me it was almost like, "Hey, look at ME! This is about ME."

[hookedontv]

2 minutes ago, lilysmom said:

EthioPYA

That is exactly how Ari says it! And it bugs me so much!

[magemaud]

2 hours ago, JocelynCavanaugh said:

People on reddit are saying that NJ has a program where Ari can be on her parents’ insurance until age 31 and her baby could be added to that.

I don't think she meets the qualifications thanks to little Avi: 

Under the provisions of P.L. 2005, c. 375 (Chapter 375), as amended by P.L. 2008, c. 38 (Chapter 38), certain over age [26] children may be eligible for coverage until age 31. This includes a child by blood or law who:

• Is under the age of 31; • Is unmarried; • Has no dependent(s) of his or her own; • Is a resident of New Jersey or is a full-time student at an accredited public or private institution of higher education; and • Is not provided coverage as a subscriber, insured, enrollee, or covered person under a group or individual health benefits plan, church plan, or entitled to benefits under Medicare.

edited to add: maybe Avi isn't mentioned on the paperwork anywhere and Ari is still using her NJ address? 

Edited October 5, 2021 by magemaud

[lilysmom]

6 minutes ago, hookedontv said:

That is exactly how Ari says it! And it bugs me so much!

It has bugged me since the FIRST time she said it!

[Rootbeer]

On 10/4/2021 at 6:03 PM, heatherchandler said:

Her dad has his own practice, I believe, so she could be on his private plan through work. 

But really it has nothing to do with the money for her, she doesn't care about costs.  She just wants to go "home."

 

I thought she said that she ended up going home to have the baby.

 

I am sure her father is paying for medical insurance for her and the baby whether is is by falsifying her status and claiming she is an employee of his practice and with benefits paid out from proceeds of his work as a doctor or paying out of pocket.  It doesn't matter how it gets done, we just know that Ari isn't paying for any of it herself nor does she work for her father.  Even doctors have to pay for their own insurance somehow.  Doctors and their businesses pay at the same rates every other employer does based on number of employees and the coverage offered.

A bare bones health insurance plan for an individual runs on average, about $450 per month.  So, if Ari's parents are paying the premiums, they are shelling over $6000 a year in coverage just for her, the baby would cost around $100 a month on her policy.  So, Ari's assertion that everything would be covered for the baby to have surgery is only true if you don't consider the sizable premiums being paid by her parents for two individuals who ostensibly do not live in the US and do not receive any basic health care here.

Edited October 5, 2021 by Rootbeer

[1011101010001]

12 minutes ago, Rootbeer said:

I am sure her father is paying for medical insurance for her and the baby whether is is by falsifying her status and claiming she is an employee of the practice and qualified for benefits or paying out of pocket.  It doesn't matter how it gets done, we just know that Ari isn't paying for any of it herself nor does she work for her father.  Even doctors have to pay for their own insurance somehow.

The family seems to have had a lot of drama, including their house burning down, filing for bankruptcy etc.  Who knows how much daddy can really afford?

[Rootbeer]

1 minute ago, MrBuhBye said:

The family seems to have had a lot of drama, including their house burning down, filing for bankruptcy etc.  Who knows how much daddy can really afford?

There may be shenanigans going on, I agree.  It is hard to figure out how Ari could've managed to apply for and receive Medicaid for her and the baby, though, since they don't reside in the US; so someone has to be paying for it.

[CloseThisAccount]

On 10/4/2021 at 3:57 PM, Rootbeer said:

I agree, it is unfair to Family Armando to constantly subject them to the histrionics. 

Oh, please! As if Armando's family doesn't get hysterical every time even the thought of Kenny comes up. "Oh, but Armando had a wife!" "Oh, Hannah won't have a mother." They make me sick. Kenny's had to suck up their hate for a year and he's shown nothing but grace through it all. 

[Xebug67]

1 hour ago, lilysmom said:

Great post! I couldn't have said it better! But you really need to learn to say what is on your mind!!   LOL

Do you remember the first time we met Ari. Her biggest thing to brag about was that she was going to have her BAE BE in EthioPYA. At the time, it was exotic and important to her to let everyone know that. Now, the same baby needs surgery and it becomes an excuse to leave the country. IMO she won't return. Bini will not have the financial resources to fight her. Besides his second son, he will lose the fancy apartment and lifestyle to which he has become accustomed.

Also, did anyone else think it was small of Kenny after watching the scene between his daughter and Papa Armando with the necklace to say, "Where's MY necklace?" I think he is so self centered, he can't stand to have anyone else in the spotlight for even a second. To me it was almost like, "Hey, look at ME! This is about ME."

Thank you, Lilysmom.  I routinely get diarrhea of the mouth, at which times I find it hard to hold back on ragging on these losers, LOL.

Let us not forget that he will also be losing the nanny/maid/caretaker/cook, Mimi.

[Xebug67]

22 minutes ago, TakeAPinotGrigio said:

Oh, please! As if Armando's family doesn't get hysterical every time even the thought of Kenny comes up. "Oh, but Armando had a wife!" "Oh, Hannah won't have a mother." They make me sick. Kenny's had to suck up their hate for a year and he's shown nothing but grace through it all. 

I thought that Armando, Kenny and Hannah hadn't been to visit, or been visited by, Armando's family since the first time we saw them all together.  Is Kenny receiving hate by osmosis?  I'm not trying to be argumentative here.  I'm sure Kenny thinks that he is hated, and maybe he was at one time or another, but nothing has been directly inflicted on him by anyone in Armando's family that we know of.

And on this trip to visit, the entire family couldn't have been lovelier to BOTH Kenny AND his daughter.

[CloseThisAccount]

2 minutes ago, Xebug67 said:

And on this trip to visit, the entire family couldn't have been lovelier to BOTH Kenny AND his daughter.

This trip those two statements were said again, through tears. And Kenny had to endure all the whispered, "Is He here? Will he come out?" As if facing him required such bravery or such a strong stomach or something. Kenny's wedding, which should be a joyful thing, is being turned into a circus of shame by these overly indulged, hateful children

[Gobi]

On 10/4/2021 at 4:26 PM, Mr. Miner said:

I mean, who doesn't appreciate a minty fresh hooha?

Hazel doesn’t, but Tariq does.

[hookedontv]

I just can’t with this idiot Ari! 

[nutella fitzgerald]

4 hours ago, lilysmom said:

Also, did anyone else think it was small of Kenny after watching the scene between his daughter and Papa Armando with the necklace to say, "Where's MY necklace?" I think he is so self centered, he can't stand to have anyone else in the spotlight for even a second. To me it was almost like, "Hey, look at ME! This is about ME."

For sure. For someone so sensitive to perceived slights, Kenny could not wait a minute to focus the attention back on him when Father Armando was being very sweet with Cassidy!

[Xebug67]

16 hours ago, TakeAPinotGrigio said:

This trip those two statements were said again, through tears. And Kenny had to endure all the whispered, "Is He here? Will he come out?" As if facing him required such bravery or such a strong stomach or something. Kenny's wedding, which should be a joyful thing, is being turned into a circus of shame by these overly indulged, hateful children

Let me start out by saying that Armando and Kenny are my favorite couple on this entire franchise.  I love them as a family with Hannah, and intermingled with Kenny's children as well.  I firmly believe that love is love, regardless of if it's man/woman, man/man, woman/woman.  I wish only the best and greatest happiness for them.

As regards Armando's family, I don't believe that any of them are evil, heinous, vicious people based upon what we've seen from them on camera.  I apologize for having forgotten about those statements that you quoted them as saying.

All of that being said, people come around in their own time and in their own way.  I have not seen any overt, malicious hatred coming from anyone in Armando's immediate family.  Who knows what they say behind closed doors when there are no cameras there.  Hopefully nothing horrible is said regarding Kenny.  I only hope and pray for Armando, Kenny and Hannah's sake that they ultimately come to accept them as a family wholeheartedly and without reservation.

I know that Kenny's feelings were hurt, and he felt ostracized and uncomfortable based on the two statements you mentioned.  But I still don't agree with your statement that Kenny had to, "suck up their hate for a year", because the only times that Kenny met Armando's family were this most recent occasion and the first time on their previous season.

Kenny may have been suppressing what they said after the first occasion of meeting them and letting it fester in his consciousness, but I really don't see what he had to "suck up" as he was not exposed to them on a frequent basis, nor was he blatantly insulted by any of them.  IMO Kenny is a drama queen, and pushy as all get out (like how he kept pushing Armando to get the father to agree to come to the wedding, and in other ways that we've seen onscreen).  Armando is much more laid back and patient about gradually accomplishing all of the things that they want from his family to come to be.  Armando knows them much better than Kenny, and is handling everything according to how he knows his family to be.  Even HE was surprised about how well the talk went with his father.

No different than my hatred of the Nazis hating and killing the Jews, or the KKK persecuting African-Americans, I feel the same way about gay bashing.  I do NOT see Armando's family in that light, as gay bashers.  They come from another generation as well as national culture.  Is it right to feel as they do?  IMO as well as most of the posters on here feel, NO, it's not right to not accept your son's choice of mate wholeheartedly and with open arms.  But do I condemn Armando's family as being hateful for their comments that Kenny could hear?  NO.  They are having difficulty relating to a lifestyle that they're unfamiliar with.  I DO feel bad that Kenny feels any pain whatsoever.  But it seems like he and his children have been the exception to the rule as far as NEVER having ever been exposed to gay hatred in their lives together.

One of my closest high school friends, Ricky, was gay.  We're talking about back in the early 80s, when being "out" was not really a thing yet.  His stepfather was a very macho, Canadian construction guy.  In an effort to get his mother and stepfather to understand about his life and choices, he, myself, the stepfather's son who was visiting us in Florida at the time and with whom I was having a vacation romance, the mother and stepfather all went out to one of the most famous gay bars in Ft. Lauderdale, Florida back in the day - the Copa.  The fact that his parents were willing to take this little excursion into Ricky's world was amazing.  Even the macho stepfather handled it very well.  Had he been overtly homophobic he likely would not have agreed to go along.

My point being that there are some parents/families that come around quicker than others.  The end result of them "getting there" and being accepting and understanding (and ideally even nurturing) is what's more important than how they get there or how long it's taken them to get there.

Patience is the key here with Armando's family, and not sweating things like unintentionally hurtful comments that were probably never meant to be hurtful by the sayers of those somments.

[Alonzo Mosely FBI]

On 10/4/2021 at 4:56 PM, Sir RaiderDuck OMS said:

The question is whether a simple surgery (make a small incision, stuff the intestines back through the hole in the abdominal wall, sew the muscle shut, close the incision) in an Ethiopian hospital is better for the baby than waiting a week, enduring a long-ass flight (complete with air pressure changes) back to the US, going to an American pediatrician, being referred to a pediatric surgeon, and finally doing the operation, all in the middle of COVID. That baby's going to have the hernia a month longer doing it Ari's way.

As for the mom: Methinks her real goal is get Ari and Avi home permanently. She likes Bini but ultimately considers him disposable. If Bini can move to America with Ari and Avi, great! If not, no biggie: maybe Ari and Avi can fly out once a year to visit him or whatever.

ALL of this.  I am seriously side eyeing JANICE at this point. The baby needs hernia surgery asap where he is not the steps that please Janice and Areolae. 

On 10/4/2021 at 5:16 PM, Sir RaiderDuck OMS said:

 They did this with each child, and I believe the cost for each was in the low six figures.

I have always wondered how Kenny financed 4 kids (technically 2 pregnancies one a single birth and the other triplets), what was his career? All I remember is disco dancing and that probably (?) wasn't his career. :-) 

On 10/4/2021 at 6:55 PM, magemaud said:

But she was supposedly employed by her father, so maybe she qualifies for health insurance through his practice? 

If he is self insured for his practice he might be able to get away w/adding her and saying she does "billing" or something remotely. But that shit can be shady depending on their plan. I believe based on both their ages Janice and Dr. Weinberg are Medicare eligible and do not need a regular commercial policy though they may have one for their employees. They are totally putting Ari on their policy, and perhaps in a less that truthful way. Maybe she has done remote billing for them or coding from Ethiopia. MAYBE.  Doubt it. 

[lh25]

On 10/4/2021 at 1:26 PM, Mr. Miner said:

I mean, who doesn't appreciate a minty fresh hooha?

LOL-what I want to know is why do I want my uterus and cervix "tightened"?

[Polliwollidoodle]

Great commentary.......does anyone remember or know what Kenny's profession is was?

[readheaded]

2 hours ago, Alonzo Mosely FBI said:

ALL of this.  I am seriously side eyeing JANICE at this point. The baby needs hernia surgery asap where he is not the steps that please Janice and Areolae. 

I have always wondered how Kenny financed 4 kids (technically 2 pregnancies one a single birth and the other triplets), what was his career? All I remember is disco dancing and that probably (?) wasn't his career. :-) 

If he is self insured for his practice he might be able to get away w/adding her and saying she does "billing" or something remotely. But that shit can be shady depending on their plan. I believe based on both their ages Janice and Dr. Weinberg are Medicare eligible and do not need a regular commercial policy though they may have one for their employees. They are totally putting Ari on their policy, and perhaps in a less that truthful way. Maybe she has done remote billing for them or coding from Ethiopia. MAYBE.  Doubt it. 

Someone please correct me if I’m wrong, but I think Kenny had a property management firm. 

[Twopper]

7 hours ago, Xebug67 said:

Armando is much more laid back and patient about gradually accomplishing all of the things that they want from his family to come to be.  Armando knows them much better than Kenny, and is handling everything according to how he knows his family to be.  Even HE was surprised about how well the talk went with his father.

I lost a whole post about this somewhere in cyberspace.  Oh, well....

At the beginning of their first season, Armando was lying to his family about why cameras were following him around.   His family knew him as a father, husband, family man, and widower.   All of a sudden he appears with a male lover when they may well have been expecting him  to show up with a new girlfriend.

Hannah is so adorable, but I really hate seeing children on these shows.

Kenny still has a Florida license plate on his car so I wonder about his/their commitment to remaining in Mexico.

The talk about another child in the tag seems a bit contrived; maybe suggested by production as there seems to be not much story line after the wedding.   I did enjoy them on PT

Sumit and Jenny--- in the last episode Papa Sumit implied Sumit had lost weight, but in this episode he seems to have gained the COVID 19 plus. 

Corey and Evelin were not in this episode except in the tag.  What a relief.  I was glad to see Cory's "Jenny" in the tag because whenever her name has come up I keep thinking of the Jenny in India.

Ellie--is still an idiot. Change my mind.

Steven and Alina--- okay this wine tasting trip has got to be producer driven.  I have been to almost every winery in central Virginia for tastings, and I was appalled by Steven's behaviour.  Alina needs to "go back Russia" without him.  He is just horrid.

Speaking of horrid,  Ari was horrid to Bini to make her announcement at the barber shop.  Also she had the nerve to buy the ticket without telling him first.  I am not on team anyone for this relationship.  I guess I should be team Avi because I do feel sorry for him.  He will probably grow up in NJ.  Ari may go back to Ethiopia once of twice, but she is a bolter.

 

Edited October 6, 2021 by Twopper

[seacliffsal]

In rewatching the Ari telling Bini in the barbershop that she was taking Avi to the U.S., it seemed to me that she purposefully wound herself up into hysterics.  She was quite calm and then manipulated her face and tears in order to manipulate those around her (Bini).  If so, then her "break-downs" are learned behaviors through which she knows that she will get her way as those around her do everything they can to stop her melt-down.  Bini recognizes her manipulative behavior (he referenced her intentionally talking about the trip in the barbershop to shame him and prevent him from angrily responding to her), but is afraid to do anything about it as he may lose Avi (and his lifestyle...).

I truly do wonder why Bini doesn't prevent Avi from leaving Ethiopia as it seems he would have the parental right to do so.  Or, does he think that Ari's family's money would win the day?

[Hotel Snarker]

My god, does Steven have ANY redeemable qualities? I hate him so much. At this point I want to see Alina dump him.

I think it's really sad that Alina said that she used to drink wine and have parties with her friends and she misses that, whereas Steven seems to have given up nothing for their relationship except for going to Turkey for 3 months if it doesn't work out. I know Alina also gave up school too so her parties are probably trivial but it just made me sad.

“Even Jesus had friends who were girls.” I’M SO EMOTIONAL. I CAN’T BREATHE. STEVEN ACTUALLY SAID THIS.

It was revolting when he stuck his tongue out to “taste” the wine. Who does that?! He is the creepiest and just trickle-truths Alina over and over about his past and transgressions. The fact he was actually going out on dates (and having sex during that period, which it seems he hasn’t yet let trickle out) after Alina told him not to is really all the information she needs to go home and dodge the massive SteVen bullet coming her way. He really is the absolute worst. 

I love Evilin screaming at Corey if he was “in love with that whore”. He married a whore!

Ellie, get out! Just don’t get coming in after that devastation and thinking you can live there. You thought you’d be drinking rum on the beach and dealing with bad WiFi . This is not that and it won’t work. I don’t get what she’s going to do for work/money other than slowly draining everything. Go back home to your great group of friends.

Ari, man, what a selfish move to book the ticket and decide without any communication. I get how you’d want to go home and are maybe having a mental breakdown, but give Bini something. Ugh.

7 minutes ago, seacliffsal said:

In rewatching the Ari telling Bini in the barbershop that she was taking Avi to the U.S., it seemed to me that she purposefully wound herself up into hysterics.  She was quite calm and then manipulated her face and tears in order to manipulate those around her (Bini).  If so, then her "break-downs" are learned behaviors through which she knows that she will get her way as those around her do everything they can to stop her melt-down.  Bini recognizes her manipulative behavior (he referenced her intentionally talking about the trip in the barbershop to shame him and prevent him from angrily responding to her), but is afraid to do anything about it as he may lose Avi (and his lifestyle...).

I truly do wonder why Bini doesn't prevent Avi from leaving Ethiopia as it seems he would have the parental right to do so.  Or, does he think that Ari's family's money would win the day?

He probably doesn’t have any money or resources to fight for custody of Avi. Makes me so sad, because he may never see Avi again. 😢 

[Baltimore Betty]

I was thinking about Ellie, she packed a lot of spices, was she expecting to cook in a house that was on an island that was decimated by a hurricane where there is no power, plumbing, and no roof on said house and in some cases, no house?  I also wondered if the drug sniffing dog at the airport smelled her bag and alerted the officers, sometimes people think fragrant spices can cover the smell of some drugs, just a thought.

[1011101010001]

11 minutes ago, Hotel Snarker said:

He probably doesn’t have any money or resources to fight for custody of Avi. Makes me so sad, because he may never see Avi again. 😢 

Hopefully he will not knock up a third flighty American tourist.

[magemaud]

1 hour ago, Hotel Snarker said:

Ellie, get out! Just don’t get coming in after that devastation and thinking you can live there. You thought you’d be drinking rum on the beach and dealing with bad WiFi .

From the "Still to come..." (which may be a different timeframe from the "Next time on...") there appears to be trouble in "No Longer Paradise" 

[My Girls]

15 hours ago, MrBuhBye said:

 

Hopefully he will not knock up a third flighty American tourist.

I think he's smarter than he looks and he will knock up a third flighty American tourist.  He knows a meal ticket when he sees it.

[Xebug67]

1 hour ago, Chloe Dog said:

I think he's smarter than he looks and he will knock up a third flighty American tourist.  He knows a meal ticket when he sees it.

As we all know, the third time's the charm!

[Breedom]

On 10/5/2021 at 11:57 AM, Xebug67 said:

Alina strikes me as someone who will grow into an elegant, refined, articulate, smart woman.  Steven will always be a backwards, spastic, uneducated, uncouth freak. 

Love this! You have captured my thoughts exactly. Alina needs to chock all this up to experience and move on. We all have crazy things we've done in our early years but we grow and learn.

[Emma Snyder]

Posts have been removed & are being reviewed by the moderators. DO NOT discuss moderator actions in this (or any) thread. 

[Dobian]

Timeline of Steven's confessions to Alina:

April 10  Steven admits to kissing other girls after he and Alina started planning a future together

April 14  Steven admits to having sexual relations with other girls

April 17  Steven admits to having relations with a girl and her brother

April 21  Steven admits to having relations with a girl, her brother, and their great dane

April 24  Steven admits that he is, in fact, Kody Brown (pulls off disguise)

Edited October 8, 2021 by Dobian

[Dobian]

On 10/6/2021 at 2:41 PM, seacliffsal said:

In rewatching the Ari telling Bini in the barbershop that she was taking Avi to the U.S., it seemed to me that she purposefully wound herself up into hysterics.  She was quite calm and then manipulated her face and tears in order to manipulate those around her (Bini).  If so, then her "break-downs" are learned behaviors through which she knows that she will get her way as those around her do everything they can to stop her melt-down.  Bini recognizes her manipulative behavior (he referenced her intentionally talking about the trip in the barbershop to shame him and prevent him from angrily responding to her), but is afraid to do anything about it as he may lose Avi (and his lifestyle...).

Areola and her mom work together to gaslight Bini as well, both of them reiterating this theme that he can't keep distrusting Areola because of what his previous girlfriend did to him.  Sorry, his distrust in Areola is earned.  She's the one who stayed with her ex in America without telling Bini.  She's the one who had her ex come visit despite Bini's protests.  She's the one who said that she was keeping the ex as a backup plan in case her and Bini didn't work out.  She's the one who hugged her ex for dear life as he was leaving.  She's the one who bought a plane ticket to America without telling Bini.  I didn't think Areola's mom was manipulative before, but it was on full display on that video call.  She completely protects and enables Areola and deflects everything onto Bini and his (well-earned) fears.  She also knows as an RN that the medical facilities in Ethiopia are perfectly adequate for performing a hernia operation and presented no medical argument for the necessity of bringing Avi to the States to have it done.  Her real motivation was to get Areola and her grandson back to America for an extended visit.

Edited October 8, 2021 by Dobian

[magemaud]

4 hours ago, Dobian said:

Her real motivation was to get Areola and her grandson back to America for an extended visit.

or forever! We've already seen indications that Ari is overstaying her month home with the baby by at least another month. I predict there will be some trumped up charges regarding Bini's activities during her absence that will explain her video call statement of "I will never come back to Ethiopia after what you did to me and Avi..." Even the smallest imagined transgression will be grounds for her not returning and she will have the full support of her parents to stay in NJ

[OneGuy]

What an apt thread title given the development of the discussion within.

[jnymph]

On 10/5/2021 at 5:25 PM, lilysmom said:

It has bugged me since the FIRST time she said it!

Yes me too! Also, why does she pronounce her ex’s name as “Lander?” 

[TwirlyGirly]

On 10/4/2021 at 2:14 AM, magemaud said:

Do you have a vaporizer for hoohah steaming? 

I've heard people say you can do everything with an InstaPot. And it's faster, too!

[TwirlyGirly]

Ariela and Bini:

One parent taking their baby out of the country without the other parent isn't easy; there's usually quite a bit of red tape that includes a notarized letter from the parent not traveling giving their permission for the child to be taken out of the country.

Did Ariela ever say whether Avi has U.S. citizenship, Ethiopian citizenship, or Dual ET/US citizenship?

Because Ariela is a U.S. citizen, she can confer her citizenship onto Avi, but it's a very long and complicated process. However, it would make it much easier for her to take Avi to the U.S.

The steps and documents needed are found at the U S. Embassy in Ethiopia  website. The correct category is "Child born out of wedlock to U.S. citizen mother".

ETA: I remember Ari and Bini getting engaged, but completely forgot they got married!

So, the correct category to view on the U.S. Embassy in Ethiopia website (link above) is "Child born in wedlock to one U.S. citizen parent and one non U.S. citizen parent (on or after November 14, 1986)."

It appears Bini has to grant his permission for that, too.

The point being Avi can't just buy a ticket, pack a couple of bags, wrap up Avi and hop on a flight out of Ethiopia. 

I actually had some experience with this when my daughter was about 3 years old (she's 25 now). I knew she was going to be born with a physical disability, and I wanted to ensure I'd be able to take her anywhere I needed to get her the best treatments, without having to worry about getting her biological father's permission. (I knew she was going to have this disability prior to her birth. Her bio father was in denial and refused to learn anything about it). So, I didn't put his name on her birth certificate. Sure enough, when she was 3 I needed to take her to the Shriner's Hospital in Montreal. (This was prior to U.S. citizens needing passports to enter CA and reenter the U.S.).

When we went through CA customs and immigration, the inspector looked at my daughter's birth certificate and said to me "Where is the notarized letter from this child's father allowing you to take her out of the U.S.?"

I replied "As you can see, sir, the father's name on my daughter's birth certificate is blank. But if you know who he is, I'll be happy to contact him".

Note: I didn't claim I didn't know who he is, so I didn't lie to the inspector. 😉

He frowned, stamped the paperwork, and waved us through.

Edited October 16, 2021 by TwirlyGirly
Corrected erroneous information

[TwirlyGirly]

25 minutes ago, TwirlyGirly said:

 

 

25 minutes ago, TwirlyGirly said:

 

 

Edited October 16, 2021 by TwirlyGirly

[Mrs. Hanson]

17 hours ago, TwirlyGirly said:

I've heard people say you can do everything with an InstaPot. And it's faster, too!

I do not want my InstaPot any where near my HooHaw, thanks!