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Fundy Weddings: All of the Cringe, None of the Booze


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Anna's dress was by far the worst, but I'll cut her some slack. Her parents aren't well-off, and IIRC, it was recycled from one of her sisters. 

Lauren, Kendra, Abbie and Katey are pretty standard. I thought they all looked nice, but none of their ensembles "wow'd" me.

Of the Duggar daughters, Jessa's dress and overall look is my favorite. The blush pink suited her hair and skin tone. I'd put Jinger at a close second. Joy and Jill were kind of sloppy, and I agree with the poster who said if Jill had an opportunity for a do-over, she would've gone in a completely different direction.

1 minute ago, 3 is enough said:

Adding my vote to include the Bates brides.  
Lots to discuss with that bunch too.

I agree! Maybe we should have a general Fundie Wedding Thread? 

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Can we do a separate thread for non-Duggars? I think the Duggar snark will get lost with all the Bates snark and the other fundie snark. The Maxwells alone can fill a thread. 

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(edited)
9 minutes ago, Tuxcat said:

https://duggardata.tumblr.com/post/174480740747/duggar-and-bates-bridal-parties-a-definitive

This link has several bridesmaids photos of the duggar weddings too. "From Joe to Josh"

I had forgotten how bad some of them were!

It doesn't have Lauren, Claire, Katie on the link yet.

 

Scrolling through that link is like looking at a scrapbook full of fails.

Jessa's short-sleeved, coral bridesmaids' dresses were so inappropriate for a late fall wedding. She probably got them on the cheap from Amazon and they were the thinnest, cheapest fabric. Those girls had to be freezing. 

I also thought Kendra's pale pink dresses made the bridal party look washed out. IMO, those colors work best when you have a bit of a tan. 

 

Edited by BitterApple
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2 minutes ago, BitterApple said:

Scrolling through that link is like looking at a scrapbook full of fails.

Jessa's short-sleeved, coral bridesmaids' dresses were so inappropriate for a late fall wedding. She probably got them on the cheap from Amazon and they were the thinnest, cheapest fabric. Those girls had to be freezing. 

I also thought Kendra's pale pink dresses made the bridal party look washed out. IMO, those colors work best when you have a bit of a tan

Speaking of "a bit of a tan," the bronzer on Jessa and Jinger was out of control at Jill's wedding.

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Just now, cmr2014 said:

Speaking of "a bit of a tan," the bronzer on Jessa and Jinger was out of control at Jill's wedding.

Lulz! I should've said "natural looking tan." Jinger and Jessa looked like the inside of a butternut squash.

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(edited)
5 minutes ago, BitterApple said:

Scrolling through that link is like looking at a scrapbook full of fails.

Jessa's short-sleeved, coral bridesmaids' dresses were so inappropriate for a late fall wedding. She probably got them on the cheap from Amazon and they were the thinnest, cheapest fabric. Those girls had to be freezing. 

I also thought Kendra's pale pink dresses made the bridal party look washed out. IMO, those colors work best when you have a bit of a tan. 

Agree and all the mismatched brown sandals... ugh. And Jill's brown belts. I don't recall which ones Jana had to add length to... was that Jill's as well? Poor Jana.

2 minutes ago, CouchTater said:

What is happening here???  Is that He Who Shall Not Be Named?

 

image.thumb.png.1077762c953016b04f09d4cab2489552.png

thats hilarious!

Edited by Tuxcat
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4 minutes ago, BitterApple said:

Lulz! I should've said "natural looking tan." Jinger and Jessa looked like the inside of a butternut squash.

The fake tan industry probably went into mourning when Jinger quit her butternut squash look. Good thing the Kardashians are still around to keep the industry afloat. 

12 minutes ago, YupItsMe said:

That dress is so Kendra.

It wouldn't work on anyone else, but it's hard to imagine her wearing any other wedding dress. 

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On the fake tan subject, maybe it's just the lighting, but poor Kendra looks like she raided Jinger's old stash of agent orange tanner and smeared it all over her arms. 

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4 minutes ago, Zella said:

On the fake tan subject, maybe it's just the lighting, but poor Kendra looks like she raided Jinger's old stash of agent orange tanner and smeared it all over her arms. 

So does her sister. It's supposed to go all over, girls, not just on your arms. (I think it's the lighting.) 

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3 hours ago, Westiepeach said:

I thought the back detail of Lauren's dress was gorgeous, but it was covered by her hair and veil. The front is just "meh."

The back of Lauren’s dress was gorgeous. She should’ve worn her hair up, but Lauren has a nice backside and she knows it. I thought her dress showed off her shape in a tasteful way. 

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6 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

The back of Lauren’s dress was gorgeous. She should’ve worn her hair up, but Lauren has a nice backside and she knows it. I thought her dress showed off her shape in a tasteful way. 

It had a very sophisticated look but the droopy hair was not good. 

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1 hour ago, deaja said:

Kendra's dress is pretty too.  

Michelle's dress for Jill's wedding is the stuff of nightmares.  

Does anyone remember what wedding had the horrible music by a Bates' girl? I can't figure out how to explain it.  In fact, I feel like maybe it was two weddings (Jill and Jessa)? But it had a Bates girl playing piano who had no concept of less is more, and thought just because she had the technical skills to put a bunch of unnecessary musical frills into the song didn't mean it was a good idea.

 

If Mullet front-hugged anyone while wearing the tin man dress, she'd put holes in them. Like Madonna falling face-down in the raft, in that old Far Side cartoon. 

Didn't Princess Erin punish play the piano at Smuggar's wedding? 

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(edited)
9 minutes ago, emmawoodhouse said:

I think Erin was still a teenager when Smuggar got married, but I'm pretty sure Jill and Jessa used her.

She would have been seventeen-ish. It was either Erin, or someone who looks and pounds plays a lot like her. Or I'm nuts. 

Back to Google I go...

This says specifically that Erin played at the rehearsal, and it mentions piano music at the wedding but not who was guilty playing it. https://popculturecrime.medium.com/duggar-dysfunction-a-very-duggar-wedding-cd3e0c7e4d4c

Edited by Heathen
ETA link and more snark because apparently I'm butter today
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Slightly off-topic....over/under on how many bridesmaids dresses Jana owns?  I'll say 15.

Jessa, Jinger and Abbie looked the most put-together of all the brides, IMO.  Jill, Joy, Katie and Lauren seemed a bit unkempt (I think it's mostly the hair that bugs me).  Kendra looked like she was playing dress-up.  Hilaria's daughter looked okay.  Poor Anna is in a category all by herself.

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1 hour ago, BitterApple said:

Jessa's short-sleeved, coral bridesmaids' dresses were so inappropriate for a late fall wedding. She probably got them on the cheap from Amazon and they were the thinnest, cheapest fabric. Those girls had to be freezing. 

That was when I still watched and I really think I remember they were from some cheap website and Jana had to fix most/all of them.  

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Jinger definitely looked amazing. I thought Joy looked beautiful as well, but can see how some don't like her hair.  Jessa looked amazing.  

I love Jill's bridesmaid's dress color. Its my favorite of all of them. What a beautiful color. 

Looking at Anna's, it looks like her wedding was in the 80's. 

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I completely forgot Abbie's dress, which probably says a lot. Looking at it know, it's very medium. It's fine. Much better than Ana's, Joy's, and Jill's, but nothing that stands out at all, either.

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2 minutes ago, Cherry Cola said:

Why do they have so many groomsmen and bridesmaids. It seems a bit over the top. I've never been to a wedding with more than about 4 each. Or is a bigger party normal?

It really seems to be cultural.  But I think in fundy circles, it ties a lot to family size- bigger families, bigger wedding parties.

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28 minutes ago, lascuba said:

I completely forgot Abbie's dress, which probably says a lot. Looking at it know, it's very medium. It's fine. Much better than Ana's, Joy's, and Jill's, but nothing that stands out at all, either.

Joy's added sleeves didn't even closely resemble the bodice. Her dress was just dreadful.

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19 minutes ago, Cherry Cola said:

Why do they have so many groomsmen and bridesmaids. It seems a bit over the top. I've never been to a wedding with more than about 4 each. Or is a bigger party normal?

In my early 20s I was the maid of honor for my cousin and she had 24 in her wedding party.  She was living with my family at the time and her parents were living in Japan, so I had to do all the planning with her (amazingly, even though my cousin was living with our family, my younger sister, who's just a couple of years younger than me wasn't asked to be in the wedding, but instead was put to work on the wedding day French-braiding bridesmaids' hair -- my mom was pissed!).  It "cured" me of ever wanting a big wedding for myself. 

Back on topic, someone was speculating how many bridesmaid's dresses Jana has.  I found this from 2019:

bridesmaid: her brother Josh Duggar's wedding to Anna Keller (9/26/08) 

bridesmaid: her parents Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar's vow renewal ceremony (2009) 

bridesmaid: her friend Priscilla Keller's wedding to David Waller (2/4/10) 

maid of honor: her sister Jill Duggar's wedding to Derick Dillard (6/21/14) 

bridesmaid: her sister Jessa Duggar's wedding to Ben Seewald (11/1/14) 

bridesmaid: her friend Michaela Bates's wedding to Brandon Keilen (8/15/15) 

bridesmaid: her sister Jinger Duggar's wedding to Jeremy Vuolo (11/5/16) 

bridesmaid: her sister Joy Duggar's wedding to Austin Forsyth (5/26/17) 

bridesmaid: her brother Joseph Duggar's wedding to Kendra Caldwell (9/8/17) 

bridesmaid: her brother Josiah Duggar's wedding to Lauren Swanson (6/30/18) 

bridesmaid: her twin brother John Duggar's wedding to Abbie Burnett (11/3/18) 

bridesmaid: her friend Mandie Query's wedding to David Poemoceah

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The one thing I liked about Joy's wedding was the bouquets.  I like warm colors, and they were a pretty shade of orange.

I liked the color of Jessa's bridesmaid's dresses, but the dresses themselves were the worst.  Cheap, clingy polyester crap.

Those modesty panels added to Jill's bridesmaid's dresses looked ridiculous.  The aqua color was nice, but that's all.

Great thread idea!

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Weirdest Duggar wedding moments:

John David's weird altar kissing routine

Jessa and Ben not doing the first kiss but having her parents demonstrate a kiss instead (I didn't find their lack of kiss to be that weird, but the parent part)

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(edited)
1 hour ago, emmawoodhouse said:

Joy's added sleeves didn't even closely resemble the bodice. Her dress was just dreadful.

She really should have gone with the first dress she tried on. That one was both really flattering and unique. I think she was too self-conscious to pick something so (relatively) form fitting, plus apparently Austin told her he preferred a looser style. 🙄

1582661791121.png

Edited by graefin
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29 minutes ago, deaja said:

Weirdest Duggar wedding moments:

John David's weird altar kissing routine

Jessa and Ben not doing the first kiss but having her parents demonstrate a kiss instead (I didn't find their lack of kiss to be that weird, but the parent part)

Josh singing "Loyalty" to Anna at the altar.

"Forgot the ring best man pranks" and IIRC something about drones...

JB moments prior to walking down the aisle - I can't stand his " this is a moment talk" 

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34 minutes ago, deaja said:

Weirdest Duggar wedding moments:

John David's weird altar kissing routine

Jessa and Ben not doing the first kiss but having her parents demonstrate a kiss instead (I didn't find their lack of kiss to be that weird, but the parent part)

Jill having enough of Jim Bob’s platitudes and shutting him up with “I’m just praying for peace”. 

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(edited)
4 hours ago, CouchTater said:

Also any future Rodrigues girls!

Why the future Rodrigues girls? I know only Nurie has been married so far but that's quite snarkable, too.

Edited by beckie
Autocorrect sucks!
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37 minutes ago, deaja said:

Weirdest Duggar wedding moments:

John David's weird altar kissing routine

Jessa and Ben not doing the first kiss but having her parents demonstrate a kiss instead (I didn't find their lack of kiss to be that weird, but the parent part)

I think John David's kissing routine would have been cute if it didn't go on for so long. I thought he was gently mocking the public's absurd anticipation over the first kiss that hangs over all their weddings, and I'm always a fan of a Duggar acknowledging how ridiculous they are.  He kissed her hand. Sweet! Then her other hand. Cute. Then what was it? Forehead, nose, cheeks? Dude! yo u  made your point!

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23 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

I have to say, this Wedding thread made me realize how heavy the Josh thread is. Its nice to have a lighthearted thread to change things up a bit.

For real! It's been nice to go back to some lighter snark. 

Speaking of which, holy fuck, does that Bates lady like her ruffled layers. 🤣

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(edited)
25 minutes ago, beckie said:

Why the future Rodrigues girls? I know only Nurie has been married so far but that's quite snarkable, too.

Brain fart.  Of course I want to include Nurthan!!!!!

Edited by CouchTater
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1 minute ago, Clawdel said:

Why was Jill barefoot? 

She liked the height difference between her and Derick and didn't want to lesson it by wearing shoes, even flat ones apparently.

Yes, really. She actually said that.

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