S01.E12: Nuclear Weapons

[Athena]

Thanks @Fremde Frau . Pinned your post.

[Fremde Frau]

From their Twitter account:

In case you need any extra nightmare fuel, @iamjohnoliver will be discussing nuclear weapons on tonight's show.

 

There was also this, a little earlier:

Learning about current events is only going to make your day more depressing. Wait until we air at 11PM on @HBO to catch up on the news.

 

Edited July 27, 2014 by Fremde Frau

[Lantern7]

Well . . . that was scary. Where is Superman when you need him? I know, The Quest For Peace never happened, but we need somebody to toss all our nukes into the sun, because it's easier than throwing all the potentially dangerous fuck-ups into the sun.

 

You can flood the Kremlin with e-mails about gecko fucking? No, thank you. John can talk all the shit he wants about kingdoms, but does he really want Vlad Putin breathing down his neck?

[larapu2000]

In defense of that one guy, wouldn't you be curious what Mexican food in Russia looks like?

[dcalley]

A quibble: Beatrix abdicated last year and her son is now king.

Edited July 28, 2014 by dcalley

[dusang]

A quibble: Beatrix abdicated last year and her son is now king.

 

I don't actually know how the law works but, presumably, it could extend to all members of the royal family, not just the sitting monarch.

 

Was it me, or did it sound very much like John said "Clown" every time he was actually saying "Crown"??

 

The #gogetthosegeckos seemed almost like a deliberate dig at the editorials claiming John's success is his "call to action" style reporting -- that he chose to "mobilize" over something so stupid (and possibly already resolved?) seems a little odd.

[The Solution]

 

The #gogetthosegeckos seemed almost like a deliberate dig at the editorials claiming John's success is his "call to action" style reporting -- that he chose to "mobilize" over something so stupid (and possibly already resolved?) seems a little odd.

 

I thought the gem inside that bit was that we now all have the link to send correspondence to Vladimir Putin. I used it to tell him he's a punk and someone needs to bitchslap him.

[dusang]

I thought the gem inside that bit was that we now all have the link to send correspondence to Vladimir Putin. I used it to tell him he's a punk and someone needs to bitchslap him.

 

Indeed, although why plant that bizarre tidbit in such an absurd piece?

[peeayebee]

I think it was basically comic relief for such a depressing time the world is going thru.

[dcalley]

I don't actually know how the law works but, presumably, it could extend to all members of the royal family, not just the sitting monarch.

I know, that's why I said it was a quibble, but it was just something where I immediately noted it wasn't exactly correct.

[ganesh]

I don't think John went far enough with the nuclear weapons. You can actually break them down and use them for fuel in nuclear reactors. We were doing this with Russian weapons and they ended up killing the program.

[dusang]

I know, that's why I said it was a quibble, but it was just something where I immediately noted it wasn't exactly correct.

 

Fair enough.

[roamyn]

Honestly? I found this episode completely boring. John seemed to get way-laid by the stupid gekko issue instead of continuing on w/the nuclear armaments problem we have.

I did know of the bomb that fell on N. Carolina (I thought it was SC, though) it fell on a family's farm & I think their truck - destroying it. But no one was hurt, TG.

[Athena]

Honestly? I found this episode completely boring. John seemed to get way-laid by the stupid gekko issue instead of continuing on w/the nuclear armaments problem we have.

I did know of the bomb that fell on N. Carolina (I thought it was SC, though) it fell on a family's farm & I think their truck - destroying it. But no one was hurt, TG.

 

It wasn't one of the stronger episodes. I think he moved around a lot with the weapons issue. It wasn't as cohesive as his other topics. Not necessarily a bad episode, but I think we have a higher standard for him now.

[stillshimpy]

Well . . . that was scary. Where is Superman when you need him? I know, The Quest For Peace never happened, but we need somebody to toss all our nukes into the sun, because it's easier than throwing all the potentially dangerous fuck-ups into the sun.

It might be less time consuming too. We do seem to be...oh, let's go with something kind...exceeding expectations in how incredibly irresponsible and cavalier we're being with global safety. Although, I did laugh my ass off at North Carolina's nearly British restraint "Scene of Nuclear Mishap" as if Bush had mispronounced the word there back in the day.

Gadzukes, that was an alarming piece. Also, the guy who dropped the socket probably had a really interesting performance review. "Nearly brought about the end of the world through clumsiness" tops pretty much every single screw-up of my entire life, twice and well into the next four or five incarnations (I dearly hope). So at least that guy made me feel a lot better about the time I dropped a toner cartridge in the copier room and broke the darned thing.

I liked this episode, sure the Gecko thing was absurd, but I appreciated the levity.

Although at this rate, by the end of the season, the only place John's going to have available to him for vacation will be securely tucked underneath his desk, because I'm pretty sure he just took Russia off the list of possibilities too, what wit the open invitation to hate-spam Vladimir Putin.

Edited July 29, 2014 by stillshimpy

[dusang]

Gadzukes, that was an alarming piece. Also, the guy who dropped the socket probably had a really interesting performance review. "Nearly brought about the end of the world through clumsiness" tops pretty much every single screw-up of my entire life, twice and well into the next four or five incarnations (I dearly hope). So at least that guy made me feel a lot better about the time I dropped a toner cartridge in the copier room and broke the darned thing.

Although at this rate, by the end of the season, the only place John's going to have available to him for vacation will be securely tucked underneath his desk, because I'm pretty sure he just took Russia off the list of possibilities too, what wit the open invitation to hate-spam Vladimir Putin.

 

What kind of socket was that?  I mean, was it really the fault of the guy who dropped it or the fault of the entire design of the system that put that guy with his droppable socket above such an incredibly sensitive weapon?

[stillshimpy]

was it really the fault of the guy who dropped it or the fault of the entire design of the system that put that guy with his droppable socket above such an incredibly sensitive weapon?

 

I'm going to pretty confidently go with both on that one, dusang.  Sure, the bulk of the blame lies with "well that's clearly the worst design ever, because a socket wrench,while handy, shouldn't be the tool of apocalyptic proportions under any even relatively sane circumstances" designers, but just as a surgeon knows that he's working with something hugely fragile and which care ought to be exercised around, Mr. Butterfinger Socket Dropper likely was aware that he was in proximity to nuclear warheads, what with being in a silo and all.  Although people do drop things, that is an instrument around which extreme care must be exercised, just by the laws of common sense what with the potential to blow up and leave an Idaho-sized hole and everything.  Try mitten-style-strings if need be.  That was in the sixties too, which was an age where fear of the bomb was hugely pronounced. 

 

So yes, in my opinion  it is both.   

Edited July 29, 2014 by stillshimpy

[Hanahope]

I'm guessing that the reason Americans don't worry as much about nuclear weapons is because we've had them now for over 50 years and they haven't been used since WW2, even though we've had several wars and many a world crisis since then.  If we haven't used them to obliterate the middle east by now, then when?

 

Most people probably even forgot they exist, or have no personal knowledge/recollection of their use.  Even when I was growing up, I don't recall my elementary school in the 70s giving us any instruction about avoiding injury from a nuclear attack, only fire drills and earthquake drills (as I lived in California).  Gotta admit, duck and cover to avoid nuclear injury, lol.

 

I love that John Oliver is making a real impact in the media already.

 

And Go Get Those Geckos!!! hahahhaa

[attica]

The thing I liked best was the inclusion of Buzz motherfucking Aldrin in the montage of celebs urging gecko retrieval. I heart Buzz.

 

Not for nothing, but if anybody compared me to the Dowager Countess, I would be proud. DowCou is everything that is awesome.

[dusang]

Not for nothing, but if anybody compared me to the Dowager Countess, I would be proud. DowCou is everything that is awesome.

 

For realsies.

[ALenore]

Well, I guess this will solve the problem of cheating: http://www.npr.org/2014/07/28/334501037/to-stop-cheating-nuclear-officers-ditch-the-grades

 

Actually, the article is interesting.  To pass, the soldiers had to score at least 90%, so they cheated in order to get a perfect score.  The new tests will rely more on practicle skills rather than pencil and paper tests.   The article also reiterates some of what John said.  

Not everyone thinks these fixes will resolve the missile force's problems. Fundamentally, the mission is a holdover from Cold War days, says Bruce Blair, a former missile officer and head of Global Zero, a campaign to eliminate nuclear weapons. Missile crews often feel like "orphans of the Air Force," Blair says. "Out of the very accurate sense that their mission is no longer the priority it once was, [they] are just trying to do whatever it takes to get by."

Lt. Col. Little acknowledges more changes are needed to reinvigorate a sense of importance in the job, but he says that changing the perfection culture is an important first step. The pass-fail testing sends a message, he says: "As a team, they need to make the right decisions, but as individuals they're not required to be perfect."

 

[Victor the Crab]

What I loved about the recent episode was Ollie's glee over being charged in Thailand over making fun of its idiot ruling monarch, which led to him mocking other monarchs around the world. They're just giving guys like Ollie so much catnip to use.

[KerleyQ]

What I loved about the recent episode was Ollie's glee over being charged in Thailand over making fun of its idiot ruling monarch, which led to him mocking other monarchs around the world. They're just giving guys like Ollie so much catnip to use.

 

Same here.  His "oh shit!" reaction was delivered perfectly.  

 

I liked the rest of the episode, too. I thought he spent the right amount of time on the nuclear weapon issue (he made the point, if he'd gone much longer, it would have been overkill).  And moving on the gecko thing was two-fold.  First, he needed something to lighten things up.  Like he said, it's been a depressing few weeks.  Second, as mentioned above, he got to drop the contact info for Putin into that segment.  You know he was pretty giddy when he had the chance to put the Putin link out there tied to something like geckos having sex in space.  (And, really, who hasn't wondered what kind of sex lives geckos would have in zero-gravity?)  Going the extra mile and getting a handful of celebs on tape urging "go get those geckos" was the perfect little extra touch. 

 

My 11 year old loves John.  I said to my husband the other day "I don't even care how many f-bombs he's hearing during an episode."  This is a kid who lists social studies as his least favorite subject in school.  So the fact that he's engaged in the topics John covers makes me happy.  

[iMonrey]

 

Honestly? I found this episode completely boring. John seemed to get way-laid by the stupid gekko issue instead of continuing on w/the nuclear armaments problem we have.

 

I thought the nuclear weapons issue was a strange topic to cover, but since this show began, I've been inclined to think Oliver has trouble picking stories simply because he doesn't want to rehash what Jon Stewart, Stephen Colbert and other shows have already exhausted during the previous week. That's why some of Oliver's shows are sort of hit-or-miss for me, because I sometimes find myself not really caring about the subject he's covering (like the FIFA thing, for example). That said, he did a good job with the nuclear weapons. And I had to crack up in spite of myself over the whole "Go Get Those Geckos" thing. 

[teddysmom]

NPR covered the nuclear missile site grading scandal and it appears that a "90" on a test is a D.   And the grades are posted and if you get a grade below A you are ridiculed beyond belief.  

 

They have gone to a pass/fail system and it appears to be working better. 

[Traveller519]

What got me was the "Reporters Covering Things They Wish They Didn't Have To" segment, I think it reinforces how most of these people get into journalism for the right reasons, but unfortunately the news that "sells" and drives ratings isn't what's necessary to inform.  I think it's really the business element of the news corporations that's feeding the spiral in news quality we see.

[Wax Lion]

I  actually recognized (sorta) the Chris Hayes one and for him the thing he didn't want to cover was some idiotic Fox News bullshit, so in that case his PoV was that he didn't want to cover the story because had no merit, but Fox was successful in turning it into something other media outlets discussed seriously, he had to do a segment on something that was not true.

 

IMO its a different way of how the industry of news is destroying news. Even if you've got someone who wants to cover the important stuff, you've basically got saboteurs working to make you stop and talk about how the moon isn't made of green cheese.

[roamyn]

What I loved about the recent episode was Ollie's glee over being charged in Thailand over making fun of its idiot ruling monarch, which led to him mocking other monarchs around the world. They're just giving guys like Ollie so much catnip to use.

Actually it's their Crown Prince. They have a good & well-beloved, though aged, monarch in Thailand.

[Milburn Stone]

In defense of that one guy, wouldn't you be curious what Mexican food in Russia looks like?

 

Yeah. In all seriousness, this was a big weak link in an otherwise important piece. Not one thing John Oliver said about what the general did in Russia sounded all that crazy to me! Maybe the general is something of an arrogant asshole, but being an arrogant asshole who wants to play guitar in a Mexican restaurant in Russia is not prima facie evidence of one's unsuitability to have responsibility for a nuclear arsenal.

Edited July 30, 2014 by Milburn Stone

[Totale]

Same here.  His "oh shit!" reaction was delivered perfectly. 

I can't agree.  I think they've started laying on the "Oh, look, it's HBO, we can say fuck and shit" so hard that just like my Mom warned me it would it loses all of its power.

[KerleyQ]

I can't agree.  I think they've started laying on the "Oh, look, it's HBO, we can say fuck and shit" so hard that just like my Mom warned me it would it loses all of its power.

 

 

I was referring more to the delivery of the line than his specific use of the word "shit." 

[Totale]

I swear like a sailor's evil mother, myself.  But was "oh, shit!"  really better than "oh, no!" there?  I think the latter, delivered right, could even have been funnier.  Opinions can vary, of course.

[ottoDbusdriver]

Oh no, all the space geckos died.

 

http://www.nbcnews.com/science/weird-science/sad-news-zero-g-sex-study-geckos-are-dead-n193316

[Kel Varnsen]

Yeah. In all seriousness, this was a big weak link in an otherwise important piece. Not one thing John Oliver said about what the general did in Russia sounded all that crazy to me! Maybe the general is something of an arrogant asshole, but being an arrogant asshole who wants to play guitar in a Mexican restaurant in Russia is not prima facie evidence of one's unsuitability to have responsibility for a nuclear arsenal.

I don't know, being drunk loud and obnoxious in some sort of diplomatic meeting (trying to fist bump Russian officials) and then getting more drunk at a Mexican  restaurant when you are on an official trip sounds like at minimum very poor decision making skills. At worse it means you have a high ranking military official with an alcohol problem. Neither of those things are something I would want a general in charge of nuclear weapons having.

[OneWhoLurks]

Quote

 

In a 2014 episode of Last Week Tonight, John Oliver, America's foremost news satirist/investigative reporter, highlighted just how careless the United States is with its 4,000 nuclear weapons. Equal parts hilarious and horrifying, Oliver's segment detailed past egregious errors—including how two atomic bombs were accidentally dropped over North Carolina in 1961—and the continued shortcomings in regard to handling the atomic arsenal. One of the most frightening details: the fact that military uses floppy disks to control its nuclear program. Floppy. Disks.

Two years later, a new report has us wanting to duck and cover because it turns out that United States Department of Defense STILL uses floppy disks to control its nuclear program. (And you thought your friend who insists on keeping her iPhone 4 was bad.)

According to the report, the Pentagon not only still uses the outdated technology to house information coordinating intercontinental ballistic missiles, tanker support aircrafts, and nuclear bombers, they use the most antiquated version of it to do so. Because the computer systems used by the Department of Defense date back to the 1970s, these records are kept on system-compatible eight-inch floppy disks. This type of storage was already out of date by the end of that decade, as smaller, 3.5 to 5.25-inch non-floppy disks became the norm before being replaced by the CD in the 1990s.

 

Confirmed: The U.S. Still Uses Floppy Disks to Run Its Nuclear Program