S10.E04: One Night Spouse

[Rae Spellman]

On 1/25/2020 at 8:28 PM, Silver Bells said:

These people are taking some chance getting married like this sight unseen.  In the first place, they are all good looking, so they can’t find someone on their own?  Then, you have to not be afraid of being in front of a camera crew, then speak.  Yikes!  I could never do it even for money.  Besides, in real life, I would know in one second after seeing a guy, if I would want to sleep with him no less.  I can’t even imagine sleeping next to a stranger.  What if he was a psycho?  They are taking some chance here and I don’t know why.  When you go on a dating site, at least you can see and talk to a person first before going forward.  Here, you’re stuck with whoever for what .. six months, or whatever.  Doesn’t make sense.  The few that stayed married was just a turn of the coin.

They get a vacation, the chance to meet the other couples, and a general change of pace from the routines of their daily lives. 

As far as sleeping next to a stranger or psycho goes, the cameras/crew might offer some protection. Plenty of the cast members might have roomed with someone who was initially a stranger in college. Plenty of them may have previously slept with someone they'd known a few weeks, days, or hours.  

Dating can be such a crapshoot that meeting someone through more traditional means itsn't necessarily better, safer, or more destined for success than meeting someone on this show. Sure, most of these relationships have failed. But, plenty of relationships fail.

Since plenty of good things have happened to me that were statistically unlikely to happen, if I was looking for a husband and the show was casting in my region, I'd consider it. I'd be mindful not to behave like Kate or Amber since my clients and colleagues might watch the show. Beyond that, I'd accept the experience for what is was. If my partner and I were a good fit, wonderful. If the marriage failed, I'd get over it, pause for a bit, and figure out what to try next. 

On 1/26/2020 at 2:28 PM, Racj82 said:

You can get a lot of people by being attractive. It doesn't mean you can keep them.

Indeed. Being attractive to television viewers isn't necessary or sufficient to sustain a lasting relationship off camera. 

Edited January 28, 2020 by RaeSpellman

[princelina]

20 hours ago, RaeSpellman said:

Good-looking is subjective. I'd argue that Zach the model isn't (much) better looking than Mindy or 6 other cast members. And, I understand that plenty of people would strongly disagree.

I agree - and he seems to be shorter than her, which wouldn't thrill me if I were Mindy.

7 hours ago, qtpye said:

 Kate was EXTREMELY attracted to Luke 

And this to me is the most perplexing mystery of all 😖

[Kareem]

14 hours ago, ShowFan said:

I don’t know...I’m happily married for 20 years and only wear my ring when I dress up to go out. I can’t stand any jewelry on me when I’m home or sleeping or working out. So I never pay attention to others wearing or not their rings because to us it doesn’t mean anything

On a show about getting what you supposedly want more than anything, agree to go along with for 8 weeks, and you both blow off the rings three days in?  Thinking the M&Ms aren’t too happy with each other.  

[Ilovepie]

7 hours ago, Ohwell said:

But that's' just what I'd do if I were on television, put on a facade to show how nice I am, even though I might be a bitch in real life.

Seriously though, while I thought asking for her hand in marriage was a bit much, I don't blame him for trying to come across as nice.   What else is a man or woman supposed to do?   I think most of us wouldn't want to come across as jackholes and embarrass ourselves and our families.

I totally agree with you, but clearly, some of these folks can’t even make it through the ceremony (Luke) let alone the honeymoon (Michael and many, many others) without showing their true colors. 
It always astonishes me how crazy and drama filled some of these situations get. After this episode, my hubs and I were talking about it, and we were both like, how hard is it to just get along with someone? I mean really, it’s 8 weeks we’re talking about, not forever. I’m pretty sure I would be putting my best self out there with a camera recording, plus the fact that I would be living with this person. I think I would be playing it like Danielle (the one with Cody) or Jaclyn ( married to awful Ryan), or Keith. Very nice, very boring.

[CaliCat]

14 hours ago, Racj82 said:

I'm sure none of y'all are watching couples couch but I'm enjoying a lot.

Jephte, in particular, is a laugh riot. 

Could you (or anyone) please explain how you watch Couples’ Couch?  I can find links to trailers, but not the actual show. 

[Hangin Out]

8 hours ago, Ilovepie said:

I totally agree with you, but clearly, some of these folks can’t even make it through the ceremony (Luke) let alone the honeymoon (Michael and many, many others) without showing their true colors. 
It always astonishes me how crazy and drama filled some of these situations get. After this episode, my hubs and I were talking about it, and we were both like, how hard is it to just get along with someone? I mean really, it’s 8 weeks we’re talking about, not forever. I’m pretty sure I would be putting my best self out there with a camera recording, plus the fact that I would be living with this person. I think I would be playing it like Danielle (the one with Cody) or Jaclyn ( married to awful Ryan), or Keith. Very nice, very boring.

I loved those first seasons with Basement Ryan, Jacklyn and the girl who kept feeding the husband take out sushi, etc.  Everything seemed real then.  Then they looked for apartments.  Oh, and that crazy one with all the smelly candles .. Sam I think, lol.  Good episodes.  P.s.  looking for Couples Couch too and can’t find it.

Edited January 27, 2020 by Silver Bells

[qtpye]

8 hours ago, Ilovepie said:

I totally agree with you, but clearly, some of these folks can’t even make it through the ceremony (Luke) let alone the honeymoon (Michael and many, many others) without showing their true colors. 
It always astonishes me how crazy and drama filled some of these situations get. After this episode, my hubs and I were talking about it, and we were both like, how hard is it to just get along with someone? I mean really, it’s 8 weeks we’re talking about, not forever. I’m pretty sure I would be putting my best self out there with a camera recording, plus the fact that I would be living with this person. I think I would be playing it like Danielle (the one with Cody) or Jaclyn ( married to awful Ryan), or Keith. Very nice, very boring.

I think something about the reality show environment breeds toxicity. I remember on one of these boards someone spoke about how she and her boyfriend were bit players in a reality show. Their "story" was that she was fighting with her boyfriend....totally made up BS and they thought it would be fun and a great way to get some extra cash.

Well, once the camera started rolling, things began to get heated. Long story short, the poster said that her and the boyfriend ended their relationship in real life after this experience.

I just feel like most people on reality shows end up miserable. The third rate fame that a show like MAFS provides can not be worth the headache, but I watch the show so I guess I am part of the problem. I figure that unless someone holds a gun to your head, everything is fair game when you sign up for one of these types of programs.

Edited January 27, 2020 by qtpye

[sasha206]

17 hours ago, Ohwell said:

But that's' just what I'd do if I were on television, put on a facade to show how nice I am, even though I might be a bitch in real life.

Seriously though, while I thought asking for her hand in marriage was a bit much, I don't blame him for trying to come across as nice.   What else is a man or woman supposed to do?   I think most of us wouldn't want to come across as jackholes and embarrass ourselves and our families.

Ha, yes, I would also not want to come across like a jerk.  I just feel like he's playing a part -- like Zach.  And I side-eye anyone who claims to never been in love at his age.  I mean, even if the feeling wasn't sustainable, I find it hard to believe he's never felt that feeling.

[Racj82]

2 hours ago, CaliCat said:

Could you (or anyone) please explain how you watch Couples’ Couch?  I can find links to trailers, but not the actual show. 

My DVR (I have Philo) just tapes the show as if it were another episode of MaFS. I didn't set it. It just happens. It airs Thursdays at 8.

[MajorNelson]

4 hours ago, CaliCat said:

Could you (or anyone) please explain how you watch Couples’ Couch?  I can find links to trailers, but not the actual show. 

 

3 hours ago, Silver Bells said:

P.s.  looking for Couples Couch too and can’t find it.

Don't know about online or Hulu whatever, but on my TV/DVR guide the main show is on 8-10pm and then there is a small 1 hour show (with same description) at 11pm.  That might be it.  Last week, the Couples Couch was 2 hours long but 4 hours of this schlock is just too much.

Edited January 27, 2020 by MajorNelson

[gonecrackers]

23 minutes ago, MajorNelson said:

 

Don't know about online or Hulu whatever, but on my TV/DVR guide the main show is on 8-10pm and then there is a small 1 hour show (with same description) at 11pm.  That might be it.  Last week, the Couples Couch was 2 hours long but 4 hours of this schlock is just too much.

I tried to watch it but FF'd through most; like you said it's too much. They need to do what 90 Day Fiance does with Pillow Talk: assume we've seen the episodes, edit out most of it, & show more reactions from the couples.  Even so it's pretty dull as some hardly comment & they are all hyper aware of the camera, but it'd be more bearable for the audience to get through.

[Racj82]

36 minutes ago, MajorNelson said:

 

Don't know about online or Hulu whatever, but on my TV/DVR guide the main show is on 8-10pm and then there is a small 1 hour show (with same description) at 11pm.  That might be it.  Last week, the Couples Couch was 2 hours long but 4 hours of this schlock is just too much.

It's always 2 hours long. As gonecrackers said below, they don't cut anything out. They literally replay the whole episode. So, couples couch is as long as the episode is. Which is my only problem with it. Cut the parts out where no reactions are. They even use the previouslies. Unnecessary.

[Hangin Out]

5 minutes ago, gonecrackers said:

I tried to watch it but FF'd through most; like you said it's too much. They need to do what 90 Day Fiance does with Pillow Talk: assume we've seen the episodes, edit out most of it, & show more reactions from the couples.  Even so it's pretty dull as some hardly comment & they are all hyper aware of the camera, but it'd be more bearable for the audience to get through.

I watch 90 day also, but it’s too far fetched, and too complicated when another country is involved.  Plus why would an American seek a woman from another country?  I think that overweight guy with the red joggers paid $20,000 to her family to marry her.  The one wh cooks in the wok beside the bed.  They are on pillow talk.

[Racj82]

2 minutes ago, Silver Bells said:

I watch 90 day also, but it’s too far fetched, and too complicated when another country is involved.  Plus why would an American seek a woman from another country?  I think that overweight guy with the red joggers paid $20,000 to her family to marry her.  The one wh cooks in the wok beside the bed.  They are on pillow talk.

I'm sure you know why an American would seek out a woman from another country. All the superficial reasons. 

[gonecrackers]

1 hour ago, Silver Bells said:

I watch 90 day also, but it’s too far fetched, and too complicated when another country is involved.  Plus why would an American seek a woman from another country?  I think that overweight guy with the red joggers paid $20,000 to her family to marry her.  The one wh cooks in the wok beside the bed.  They are on pillow talk.

It is very contrived, but at least their Pillow Talk isn't the full length of the actual episode (& it's more entertaining as the people on it show more personality & humor). These couples on the couch thing mostly just sit there with a comment once in a while - for two hours - it's not being done well. 😴

[seasick]

9 hours ago, Silver Bells said:

I loved those first seasons with Basement Ryan, Jacklyn and the girl who kept feeding the husband take out sushi, etc.  Everything seemed real then.  Then they looked for apartments.  Oh, and that crazy one with all the smelly candles .. Sam I think, lol.  Good episodes.  P.s.  looking for Couples Couch too and can’t find it.

Couples couch for me anyway is on the same station but the following night. Thursday. I have DirecTV and it's on Lifetime.

[Hangin Out]

1 hour ago, seasick said:

Couples couch for me anyway is on the same station but the following night. Thursday. I have DirecTV and it's on Lifetime.

The show is on Wed & Thurs here (N.Y.) all night, but it doesn’t specifically say “Couples Couch”.  They all just say Married at First Sight.  Who knows?  It might just pop up.  It did last week, but I don’t remember how or what time.  I remember Anthony and wife and Jepthe & wife talking.

[answerphone]

I'm enjoying Couples Couch, because it's like watching the show with friends.

That's nice, because I watch MAFS with my dog. 🙄

[MajorNelson]

6 hours ago, seasick said:

Couples couch for me anyway is on the same station but the following night. Thursday. I have DirecTV and it's on Lifetime.

I think that's it.  I see that's what this week's Guide/DVR shows for Thursday, and yes it's two hours long.  Description says "Past couples..discuss the episode..."

[Lindz]

On 1/26/2020 at 8:49 PM, Kareem said:

On a show about getting what you supposedly want more than anything, agree to go along with for 8 weeks, and you both blow off the rings three days in?  Thinking the M&Ms aren’t too happy with each other.  

EXACTLY!! Wasn't even worth my response because that's OBVIOUSLY different from what I'm talking about & #ICANTEVEN! It's highly UNLIKELY they're not  wearing their rings 'just cuz.' 😂

[DrewPaul2010]

 

Quote

 

Saturday at 01:55 PM

Nick and Sonia were the first couple to lie about their coitus until Sonia "cracked" and spilled the tea.......so there is a precedence of keeping sexy time on the DL  and not coming clean to the "experts"

 

I would say right up front that everything else is on the table but what occurs between couples in the bedroom is no one's business. I'd never ask a couple (even under these circumstances) if they consummated the married. I can't believe how many people ask such a question. Why not ask how long his penis is?

[gonecrackers]

4 hours ago, DrewPaul2010 said:

 

I would say right up front that everything else is on the table but what occurs between couples in the bedroom is no one's business. I'd never ask a couple (even under these circumstances) if they consummated the married. I can't believe how many people ask such a question. Why not ask how long his penis is?

Cortney of the first season made sure the audience knew she did not want a guy with a small penis. She also made sure everyone knew Jason did not disappoint.

They're divorced now anyway.

Edited January 28, 2020 by gonecrackers

[humbleopinion]

Some say girth....

[DrewPaul2010]

19 hours ago, gonecrackers said:

Cortney of the first season made sure the audience knew she did not want a guy with a small penis. She also made sure everyone knew Jason did not disappoint.

They're divorced now anyway.

That's the big difference in regular dating that leads to marriage. You check off the attraction boxes first before pursuing a possible candidate. My dad gave me a great piece of advice; Check out the mother of the woman you are courting because its a good indication of how your wife will appear 20 years down the road.

 

[Ilovepie]

1 hour ago, DrewPaul2010 said:

That's the big difference in regular dating that leads to marriage. You check off the attraction boxes first before pursuing a possible candidate. My dad gave me a great piece of advice; Check out the mother of the woman you are courting because its a good indication of how your wife will appear 20 years down the road.

This can go work both ways - should the women check out the father of the man they are with??? 😜

[gonecrackers]

1 hour ago, DrewPaul2010 said:

That's the big difference in regular dating that leads to marriage. You check off the attraction boxes first before pursuing a possible candidate. My dad gave me a great piece of advice; Check out the mother of the woman you are courting because its a good indication of how your wife will appear 20 years down the road.

 

Well, sometimes she may resemble someone else in her family; not every woman looks like her mom. I was told I resemble a relative who died many years before I came along so I never knew her. When I saw the one picture anyone had of her it all made sense LOL. She passed away in her 40s, so there's no way to know how she would've aged.

16 minutes ago, Ilovepie said:

This can go work both ways - should the women check out the father of the man they are with??? 😜

This too & what I said above could also apply.  I've seen both men & women age nothing like their parents, & one I know like that even looked very much like his father when younger (his father aged better LOL).

[ramble]

Dang sinus infection kept me from watching until now and I realize this episode has been dissected and examined well already but apparently I have a driving need to add my two cents. I’ll keep it short - Taylor and growly voice bore me presently, Derek and freckle face seem destined to burn hot but flame out (is she even getting to know him or just asking about future sex?), Austin and Jess, the poster that mentioned them seeming like brother and sister has made me see that so clearly that I’m now sufficiently grossed out and may have to look away when they kiss, and now to the others... If Michael said that on the plane, and I think he did, the attempt to gaslight after the fact makes me angry. Go Meka tell him straight because that is crap. They are doomed. Mindy and the hair are so mismatched. She needs more confidence to meet his excess of confidence. She also needs to take down her obvious high octane interest in him a notch or twenty.  I know she might get her heart broken and I know Mik and Mek are doomed but I can’t help it I’m here for the train wrecks. My hopelessly stupid romantic girl side wants these couples to stand a chance the first episode or two but by now she’s admitted the truth that chances are slim and my reality loving trash girl pushes her over to the loser’s table and plops down at the bash and trash table fully ready to engage. Bring on the cringy, dramatic, hot mess that is low rent reality TV. 

[Ilovepie]

1 hour ago, gonecrackers said:

This too & what I said above could also apply.  I've seen both men & women age nothing like their parents, & one I know like that even looked very much like his father when younger (his father aged better LOL).

Or how about this one: My daughter resembles my husband much more than she looks like me, in fact, she generally takes after his side of the family looks-wise. My son looks like a twin of my brother when he was the same age.

[Kareem]

2 hours ago, ramble said:

Dang sinus infection kept me from watching until now and I realize this episode has been dissected and examined well already but apparently I have a driving need to add my two cents. I’ll keep it short - Taylor and growly voice bore me presently, Derek and freckle face seem destined to burn hot but flame out (is she even getting to know him or just asking about future sex?), Austin and Jess, the poster that mentioned them seeming like brother and sister has made me see that so clearly that I’m now sufficiently grossed out and may have to look away when they kiss, and now to the others... If Michael said that on the plane, and I think he did, the attempt to gaslight after the fact makes me angry. Go Meka tell him straight because that is crap. They are doomed. Mindy and the hair are so mismatched. She needs more confidence to meet his excess of confidence. She also needs to take down her obvious high octane interest in him a notch or twenty.  I know she might get her heart broken and I know Mik and Mek are doomed but I can’t help it I’m here for the train wrecks. My hopelessly stupid romantic girl side wants these couples to stand a chance the first episode or two but by now she’s admitted the truth that chances are slim and my reality loving trash girl pushes her over to the loser’s table and plops down at the bash and trash table fully ready to engage. Bring on the cringy, dramatic, hot mess that is low rent reality TV. 

lolol  I think you pretty much and pretty accurately covered it.  

Be well... 

[DrewPaul2010]

4 hours ago, Ilovepie said:

This can go work both ways - should the women check out the father of the man they are with??? 😜

Absolutely! Character and looks the egg-corn doesn't fall far from the tree.

[qtpye]

7 hours ago, DrewPaul2010 said:

That's the big difference in regular dating that leads to marriage. You check off the attraction boxes first before pursuing a possible candidate. My dad gave me a great piece of advice; Check out the mother of the woman you are courting because its a good indication of how your wife will appear 20 years down the road.

 

I feel like this is a bit of outdated Boomer advice. Think about Christie Brinkley and her daughter Alexa Ray Joel. Alexa is striking and looks nothing like her mother and very unlikely to age like her. Also, if a man truly loves a woman, he finds her beautiful in old age...look at Prince Charles.. No disrespect to your dad because I’m sure it does hold true in some situations.

3 hours ago, Ilovepie said:

Or how about this one: My daughter resembles my husband much more than she looks like me, in fact, she generally takes after his side of the family looks-wise. My son looks like a twin of my brother when he was the same age.

I resemble my dad as well.

[MajorNelson]

20 hours ago, ramble said:

If Michael said that on the plane, and I think he did, the attempt to gaslight after the fact makes me angry.

I wonder if on the plane he talked about sex and it's importance, and then added that he hoped they had sex before they left Panama, and that it would set them on a good path.

Then, for some reason, she gets defensive.

What we see on camera is her saying that he had a timetable, and that sex on the honeymoon was the deal or else he wouldn't be "in" the marriage.

Who's to say she isn't a nut and misconstrued his words?

Could be a total miscommunication/gaffe.

Edited January 30, 2020 by MajorNelson

[gonecrackers]

29 minutes ago, MajorNelson said:

I wonder if on the plane he talked about sex and it's importance, and then added that he hoped they had sex before they left Panama, and that it would set them on a good path.

Then, for some reason, she gets defensive.

What we see on camera is her saying that he had a timetable, and that sex on the honeymoon was the deal or else he wouldn't be "in" the marriage.

Who's to say she isn't a nut and misconstrued his words?

Could be a total miscommunication/gaffe.

That's a big difference - if that was the case he could've cleared it up fairly easily (I would think). Instead he acted like a deer in the headlights having been confronted with his words, on camera, so he left her.

[MajorNelson]

I think he had had little experience standing up to women.

[Purplelady25]

Why was Taylor wearing those big ass eyeglasses To BED??? 
I like the comment about Michael’s headphones! I can’t stand people who wear those dumb things constantly. Why did he think he needed to pack them, for the airplane ride? And he then came to the group after sleeping and eating breakfast alone, wearing those idiotic headphones. What a schmuck. I feel sorry for Meka. I wouldn’t want someone giving me an ultimatum About SEX two days after meeting them. What nerve!!

Mindy - Let Zack, the-6-pack, wash his face In Privacy. You can wait until he’s done to carry on a conversation. You will have plenty of time unfortunately - he’s not gonna get romantic with you, I don’t think........

 

 

 

 

[Kira53]

On 1/26/2020 at 5:28 PM, Racj82 said:

I agree with others too in regards to being perplexed about all the things that bug people so, so much. That's also part of the dating problem today. People are even more nitpicky out there but also online dating makes it's easier to only seek out what you think you want to the exact degree.

Many people are extremely rigid in their thinking and in their behavior. This makes it extremely difficult to get along because they believe that their rules are universal and that you should go along with them. If they're lucky enough to get somebody very easy-going and that person can adapt to the rules the marriage might work.  I'm not much of a rules person so I know I would have a lot of difficulty living with someone who wants to set the rules that I never lived with and that I don't think are important. For instance,  I'm all for taking your shoes off when you come into the house and if you provide a special place I'll eventually learn to do it every day.  I like going barefoot in the house I just don't have a routine take my shoes off at the door. But that's because I'm not worried that much about dirt and germs. 

I'm not sure about the inside outside clothes and whether I'd like to do that every day because somebody else thinks it's important. Maybe if I have a lot of clothes and a giant walk in closet that makes it so easy to choose new clothes when you come home I'd do it more.  When I was younger I think it was easier to live and let live in cohabitation but now I don't want somebody else to set the rules for me.  Luckily I don't have rules for other people,  just for myself. But most people have rules for other people. It's a miracle when people that didn't date get along.  

On 1/27/2020 at 12:12 AM, Ilovepie said:

I totally agree with you, but clearly, some of these folks can’t even make it through the ceremony (Luke) let alone the honeymoon (Michael and many, many others) without showing their true colors. 
It always astonishes me how crazy and drama filled some of these situations get. After this episode, my hubs and I were talking about it, and we were both like, how hard is it to just get along with someone? I mean really, it’s 8 weeks we’re talking about, not forever. I’m pretty sure I would be putting my best self out there with a camera recording, plus the fact that I would be living with this person. I think I would be playing it like Danielle (the one with Cody) or Jaclyn ( married to awful Ryan), or Keith. Very nice, very boring.

I agree. It is amazing how some people can't even do it for a short amount of time. This is probably another reason why no matter how good looking or not they are not in a happy marriage or even in a happy relationship. That's why looks attract but it really has nothing to do with whether you can get along and enjoy being with them.  Many people feel like they should get what they want and not settle.  What they don't realize is that a lot of things that they want are not the average way people live. No problem with inside outside close but since most people don't do that it could be difficult if you demand it.

On 1/27/2020 at 10:26 AM, sasha206 said:

Ha, yes, I would also not want to come across like a jerk.  I just feel like he's playing a part -- like Zach.  And I side-eye anyone who claims to never been in love at his age.  I mean, even if the feeling wasn't sustainable, I find it hard to believe he's never felt that feeling.

I believe him. Because I know people are so different and some people fall in love all the time I'm sure others are not as subject to attaching themselves to other people. Just about everything seems to be on a bell curve to a certain degree, most people in the middle and some extremes on either end.

[endure]

On 1/22/2020 at 8:59 PM, princelina said:

I confess - I would go to sleep and shower in the morning.  Mr. P showers as soon as we hit a hotel but is not bothered by me.  I like Mindy and am finding her more attractive as a result.  Did Zach actually scold her and act annoyed because she was talking to him while he washed his face?

This was another earlier in the season example of an issue Zach had with his cleanliness and he was upset when Mindy was talking to him while he washed his face.  I am getting more convinced he is possibly OCD and it is hindering his relationship.