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TDS 3.0 Season Five Talk


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Not sure why Trevor was making a big deal out of that slimey yellow blob, it was a "slime mold" and they have been known for at least 150 years. They can crawl around and if you have one you can feed it oatmeal.

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Well, lots of news services have picked up on the story of the slime mold exhibit that is being featured at the Paris zoo, so I liken Trevor's mention of this to Colbert's "Meanwhile" segments or Seth Meyers's "The Kind of News We Need Right Now" segments.  They serve as fun mindless fluff to mix in with the endless grind of trying to make jokes about the demise of the rule of law in the US. 

Plus?  Slime molds made headlines back in June of 1973.  I have a copy of an article from Time magazine describing a mysterious "blob" invading the back yard in a Dallas suburb.  Also featured in that issue - mention of some young feller named John Dean testifying to investigators that Nixon had indeed conspired to cover up the Watergate break-in.  So, I for one welcome the return of our slime mold overlords.

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I watch Dancing with the Stars--that is, I watch the actual dance routines and fast forward past the rehearsal bullshit, the judging, and other nonsense--and something like the deal with Spicer happens every year. Someone with absolutely no dance ability, who fails to improve over the season, stays on while much better dancers are eliminated because they have a large fan base. I wish they'd change the rules so the judges' scoring weighed more.

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Watching Sean Spicer try to game the DWTS voting system, making himself the right choice for certain types of voters? That's a bit sickening. But then we wound up getting Trevor showing a few clips of his DWTS experience in South Africa, then he revealed his spotted dancing shirt as he challenged Spicer to a dance-off. Sooooooo . . . maybe things came out even?

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3 minutes ago, DoctorAtomic said:

Wow, Mrs. Clinton, good for you. That was a great bit. 

I'm amazed she can joke about 2016. Something like that happens to me, I would basically be the Bitterest Betty.

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Going back to the Dancing With the Stars/Sean Spicer bit, the voting on these kinds of shows always bigs me. Not only is there multiple voting, but people often vote for the worst person just to mess with things. Or they vote for the person they like, which has nothing to do with the talent. BUT... Spicer actually soliciting votes is worse than all that. I mean, he must know that he's a terrible dancer, that there are others on the show much better than he (which I'm only assuming since I haven't watched any of this season). So his motivation has absolutely nothing to do with merit.

Hillary in that opening bit was outstanding. Loved it.

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Hillary Clinton was great in that cold opening. I'm glad that she hasn't become bitter over the way the 2016 election was stolen from her.

FUCK THE NATIONALS!!! That team was ripped out of Montreal by the greedy idiots of MLB. Bud Selig should burn in Hell alongside George Steinbrenner.

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7 hours ago, Victor the Crab said:

Hillary Clinton was great in that cold opening. I'm glad that she hasn't become bitter over the way the 2016 election was stolen from her.

Once again: I'd be the Bitterest Betty. "How are you doing? I ASKED HOW YOU WERE DOING! I DON'T THINK WE CAN HEAR EACH OTHER OVER THE SOUND OF ALL THAT WINNING!"

7 hours ago, Victor the Crab said:

FUCK THE NATIONALS!!! That team was ripped out of Montreal by the greedy idiots of MLB.

Was there any scenario where the Expos weren't leaving Montreal? I reckon the best incentive for fans of visiting teams to come over would be a greater chance to get foul balls. On the bright side, three Hall of Famers wear Expos caps on their busts in Cooperstown. That's one more than the Mets.

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17 hours ago, Lantern7 said:

Was there any scenario where the Expos weren't leaving Montreal? I reckon the best incentive for fans of visiting teams to come over would be a greater chance to get foul balls. On the bright side, three Hall of Famers wear Expos caps on their busts in Cooperstown. That's one more than the Mets.

There were teams that were in equal if not worse situations than the Expos were in, but managed to turn things around. Cleveland comes to mind. So my bitterness towards MLB remains valid.

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On 10/31/2019 at 10:01 AM, DoctorAtomic said:

I'm so sick of the whole Baby It's Cold Outside nonsense. *The woman actually wants to stay*. 

Same. It was an interesting example of cultural changes over time when the discussion on it first started (from our modern perspective it sounds creepy but at the time it was understood that she did want to stay but had to pretend she didn't for modesty reasons). But now it's the same discussion every year...we get it.

Anyway, I about died laughing at that Smokey the Bear montage. Between that and all those really trippy anti-drug commercials they used to have, I feel like (ironically) the marketers who made PSAs in the 80s and 90s were all smoking a metric shit-ton of weed while they came up with this stuff.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N77xVUGwKFM&fbclid=IwAR3c_QWduB8OGC59o8qEiixwuuPu-P9hB1h9YOJUfYDv6aTY0tdK0Sw5nOk

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9 hours ago, peeayebee said:

I have long noticed how weirdly Trump sits, but I never thought about how he stands. The two seem related. Maybe he has a spinal condition.

I think he always had that. If you watch all of his 90s-00s cameos on shows and movies, he seems to stoop a lot.  But he is in his 70s, so I guess age plays a huge role. It probably wasn't prevalent in the 70s and 80s, but I think by the 90s you noticed a total change in posture.

Edited by Robert Lynch
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16 hours ago, BuyMoreAndSave said:

Same. It was an interesting example of cultural changes over time when the discussion on it first started (from our modern perspective it sounds creepy but at the time it was understood that she did want to stay but had to pretend she didn't for modesty reasons). But now it's the same discussion every year...we get it.

Anyway, I about died laughing at that Smokey the Bear montage. Between that and all those really trippy anti-drug commercials they used to have, I feel like (ironically) the marketers who made PSAs in the 80s and 90s were all smoking a metric shit-ton of weed while they came up with this stuff.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N77xVUGwKFM&fbclid=IwAR3c_QWduB8OGC59o8qEiixwuuPu-P9hB1h9YOJUfYDv6aTY0tdK0Sw5nOk

That was funny!

On 11/2/2019 at 9:02 AM, Victor the Crab said:

Hillary Clinton was great in that cold opening. I'm glad that she hasn't become bitter over the way the 2016 election was stolen from her.

FUCK THE NATIONALS!!! That team was ripped out of Montreal by the greedy idiots of MLB. Bud Selig should burn in Hell alongside George Steinbrenner.

She was ace in the opening.

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I just noticed last night that Trevor has bowed to the American pronunciation of controversy. Maybe Comedy Central figured we didn't understand conTRAversy. Pretty sure he's sticking firm on zehbra, though.

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50 minutes ago, 2727 said:

I just noticed last night that Trevor has bowed to the American pronunciation of controversy. Maybe Comedy Central figured we didn't understand conTRAversy. 

NOOOOOOOO! I didn't notice that. Don't change, Trevor!

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11 hours ago, peeayebee said:

I have long noticed how weirdly Trump sits, but I never thought about how he stands. The two seem related. Maybe he has a spinal condition.

He also walks like he's trudging uphill all the time, even on flat land.  I think they joked he was walking in a windstorm or snowstorm.  But I don't think it's a spinal condition.  If you watch Barron, he has the same stance with his arms hanging from Frankenstein shoulders, and the same uphill trudging gait.

Edited by izabella
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I was actually looking at that just the other day (and even more candidates showed up after that! So far, I count 15(!)

  1. Bill de Blasio
  2. Michael Bennet
  3. Marianne Williamson
  4. Andrew Yang
  5. Tim Ryan
  6. Eric Swalwell
  7. Kirsten Gillibrand
  8. Pete Buttigieg
  9. Bernie Sanders
  10. Jay Inslee
  11. Kamala Harris
  12. Beto O'Rourke
  13. Amy Klobuchar
  14. Cory Booker
  15. Julián Castro

Plus, there was also Mark Sanford, a GOP candidate.

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11 hours ago, 2727 said:

I just noticed last night that Trevor has bowed to the American pronunciation of controversy. Maybe Comedy Central figured we didn't understand conTRAversy. Pretty sure he's sticking firm on zehbra, though.

Wait, what?? Maybe I’m behind; I’m listening to the podcast version with the vaping segment (last night? Night before last?) and it’s still conTROVersy there. 

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On 11/8/2019 at 8:39 PM, angora said:

I was actually looking at that just the other day (and even more candidates showed up after that! So far, I count 15(!)

Which meant TDS got to bring out their graphic of candidate heads. The one filling out the final spot last night: Sister Night from Watchmen.

I have no idea why Bloomberg is flexing. I get the dissatisfaction of the current nominees, but he’s a billionaire AND a former NYC Mayor. I don’t think Democrat voters want either one.

Anyone else think Anna Kendrick didn’t promote her movie as much as she did her shoulders? Damn, those were out there.

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Damn, Fox News is really pushing the “meaninglessness” of the impeachment. The only thing Trevor was missing was the gaslight Jordan used on his show. Also: this process isn’t supposed to be sexy, especially given the figure at the center of it.

Edited by Lantern7
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I've never had an Impossible Burger before, as they are not sold here in Canada (the people I know who have tried it say it's outstanding). But I've had something closer to that here called Beyond Meat. I tried them for the first time at an A&W restaurant (the Canadian ones, which are awesome, unlike the U.S. versions). The texture to them was different, but the taste was truly great! I never would imagine a meatless burger would be so dee-lish.

Soon after, they started selling Beyond Meat patties at our local grocer, so I bought a few for a late spring long weekend barbeque with family. After grilling them like a regular hamburger, and serving them to be consumed, everyone raved about the burgers they had and asked if it was a beef/pork combo or a special type of beef. When I told them that the burgers they ate had zero animal meat in them, they were left gobsmacked and speechless.

The downside for the burgers - at least for the time being - is that they are quite pricey. A packet of two Beyond Meat patties can run around seven to eight dollars Canadian. But hopefully, if demand increases, the prices will go down. Which would be a good thing all around.

And another thing about these burgers. They do a pretty good job of loosening your stools.

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I doubt the meatless burger price will go down. Salads have been around for millions of years and they still cost more than a burger and fries do at a fast food restaurant, even thought the ingredients are one-fifth the price. The fast food restaurants know people will pay the higher prices because they want to eat healthier. 

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Yeah no, Trevor. I don't care one bit if Trump's feelings were hurt. After all the denigrating, mocking, name-calling and lies he's told about others? And that's just in public.

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28 minutes ago, Robert Lynch said:

That tweet to Greta from Trump. I am speechless and horrified. I have no words to say about that.

Especially considering all the gnashing of teeth that we saw from Melania and others so recently over a lame joke involving Barron's name. Minority children have a right to privacy and deserve to be kept out of politics, you know - Be Best!

In the story this week on Afghanistan, I loved Trevor's plan to fund schools and hospitals by telling the military that the Taliban is hiding there (seriously, "forest-pattern" camouflage in the desert, people?!)

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1 hour ago, Arcadiasw said:

Great to see Jordan Klepper again but his segments at those Trump rallies. 😳 Those people. SMH. 🤦‍♀️

"Read the transcript!  Read the transcript!  Read the transcript!"

"Have you read the transcript?"

"Well, no, but..."

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58 minutes ago, walnutqueen said:

"Read the transcript!  Read the transcript!  Read the transcript!"

"Have you read the transcript?"

"Well, no, but..."

I need a lobotomy after that. Reminds of that Twilight Zone episode where the whole thing the man had was a cookbook.

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Good to see Jordan gainfully employed at TDS again - even if it's only specifically for the upcoming election. The beard is a nice touch for him.

But those people attending that rally in Hershey? GAAAH, the stupid burns white hot with them!!! How is Jordan not an alcoholic after listening to these people all these years?

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As an officially certified (and certifiable?) "nasty woman" I detest the entire concept of beauty pageants.  Scholarship pageants?  Yeah, no.  Nowhere are the contestants asked to parade before the judges displaying their SAT scores.  Having said that... yowza!  Ms Universe was stunningly beautiful, utterly charming and delightful, and I'm convinced she is sincere in her intent to use her platform to make the world a better place.  So, congratulations and best wished to her, and once again one of Trevor's interviews has opened my mind a teeny tiny crack.

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