Jenelle: Birther Of 3, Mother To None

[wrestlesflamingos]

Nathan basically offered NASA the idea for Voyager. Except with less acumen and more ham fistedness.

http://voyager.jpl.nasa.gov/

[Brooklynista]

Well how about we start a campaign to get this genius blasted off into space so he can dmore research.

To Infinity and Beyond with his dumb ass!

[ghoulina]

I can't stop laughing. I can imagine him trying to explain his idea to Jenelle, as she glazes over and says in her incredibly monotone voice, "Wow, that is so brilliant. You're a genius".

[SPLAIN]

Imagine Nathan trying to tell Jenelle he needs to head over to Nasa to give them his idea in person. Her response: "Are you fucking kidding me? So your gonna leave me here alone with the damn dogs and Kaiser to clean up their shit?"

 

I propose a fundraiser to send those two off to space for eternity.

[spidermiss2426]

http://www.mtv.com/news/1941550/nathan-griffith-shirtless-birth-announcement-photos/

 

Did everyone see this today?  Shirtless Nathan holding Kaiser and Jace not in any of the photos? 

[zenme]

OmG.  That baby is so cute.  He has no idea that it's all downhill from here.  Seriously.  It's sad.

[RedKoolAide]

Nathan is such a smarmy douche.

[Straycat80]

Here we go again with Jenelle making excuses for not getting custody of Jace. She is such a POS. But then she gets upset that Babs took Jace to his first fireworks which she had wanted to do because 'she's his Mom'. No, Jenelle, you have not been a real Mom to Jace because you didn't want to be. All she thinks about is herself and not what makes Jace happy.

[spidermiss2426]

Although I do want to say this for Janelle, she has some hella Genetics!! Or luck.  After all the drugs she's done, she is still a beautiful (on the outside) girl.  Too bad her inside doesn't match up to her outside.

[ghoulina]

Awww, baby Kaiser Permanente is so cute. Really, a beautiful little baby. Nathan's belly button creeps me out. That's all I have to say.

[CaliforniaLove]

Jenelle is irredeemable at this point. How is it that after the birth of Kaiser Soze, we see her laying around doing nothing even MORE than before? I thought Nathan was on nighttime duty for a night or 2 so she could rest after the act of giving birth...apparently it's now a permanent situation. I guess Nipples needs to earn his keep somehow.

And they can both quit trying to force the "look how cute we are with a child sleeping on us as we sleep" bullshit pose.

[sandwoman]

Next week's preview shows Barb, Janelle and Jace agreeing on a plan to transfer Jace back to Janelle (in theory ....): http://www.mtv.com/shows/teen_mom_2/weve-come-so-far-sneak-peek/1084354/video/#id=1731201

I have to admit, I got a little pre-teary when Barb started crying, worrying that Jace will think she's abandoning him. It was like she let her gruff guard down and showed some real emotions. Of course, Janelle sits there, stone-faced, barely looking up from her phone ...

[FozzyBear]

Poor kid. Once Janelle's feeling better and the after baby glow has worn off and parenthood becomes the inevitable grind that all parents remember ( I mean seriously. Almost anybody can hold it together to look like a good mom for a week or two. It's the doing it for years that makes a good parent) Janelle will dump Kiser off on someone too. I think she intends to do it when she's expecting, but just can't handle the actual doing, especially the boredom. She seems to have a bizarrely low tolerance for being bored and lots of times taking care of kids is kind of tedious. I feel so bad for her boys and her future children because we all know she's going to find another guy and do this again.

Edited September 25, 2014 by FozzyBear

[StatisticalOutlier]

I don't like mohawks on anybody, probably because I associate them with Taxi Driver, where the look matched the personality.  That's my problem with Jace's--it appears he's already becoming rather violent, hitting other kids--why have him look the part, too?  Then again, maybe the mohawk is a good thing, because it will alert people to what lurks within.

 

 

"Everyone hating on Jace's hair... U all act like hair doesn't grow back..." Jenelle tweeted. "Keep going.. I'm being very entertained."

 

It's true--it does grow back.  But that's right in line with Jenelle's world, that nothing ever has permanent consequences.  Have a baby?  Just hand him off to Barb to raise.  Get arrested over and over?  Get lawyer/miracle worker Dustin to take care of it.  Be a heroin addict, have an abortion and get knocked up by a doofus so soon after that you don't know if a pregnancy or just abortion remnants?  Have an adorable baby.  I wouldn't take her life for a nanosecond, but I'd like to have just a tiny sliver of her luck.

 

Edited because what hair does is grow back, not go back.

Edited September 25, 2014 by StatisticalOutlier

[FozzyBear]

I have to admit the one thing I agree with Janelle on is Jace's hair. It's fine, not my taste, but fine. Criticizing a haircut of a little kid seems weird. It is just a haircut. That really does have a "get a life of your own" feel to it. Plus, when it comes to criticizing Janelle how do you even have time to ponder that haircut?

[lovesnark]

Jenelle is irredeemable at this point. How is it that after the birth of Kaiser Soze, we see her laying around doing nothing even MORE than before? I thought Nathan was on nighttime duty for a night or 2 so she could rest after the act of giving birth...apparently it's now a permanent situation. I guess Nipples needs to earn his keep somehow.

And they can both quit trying to force the "look how cute we are with a child sleeping on us as we sleep" bullshit pose.

Thank you for my belly laugh of the day.  Wasn't Jenelle nursing little Kaiser Roll when they came home from the hospital? I swear she was and she said something about pumping. But, last night both of them were making bottles with powdered formula. I guess nursing while laying in bed was just too exhausting.

[Persnickety1]

Excuse du Jour:  Babs would be too lonely if she took Jace away.

 

Anybody started keeping a formal list of her excuses yet?

 

http://www.realitytea.com/2014/09/24/jenelle-evans-shes-not-pursuing-custody-jace-mom-lonely/

 

 

There are two episodes left of Teen Mom 2 season 5 – and we’re in for more of Nathan Griffith – in all his control freak and passive aggressive glory – bashing Barbara Evans and pressuring Jenelle Evans about getting custody of Jace. Because he thinks he’s God’s gift to parenting. In a preview of tonight’s episode, we see Jenelle come up with another reason why she doesn’t want custody of Jace: she’s worried her mother will feel lost without him.

 

I think Jenelle should really just own the fact that she has no maternal bond with Jace and let it go already.  Quit trying to make NOT wanting her son some altruistic bullshit.  I don't think I've ever seen Jenelle have a single fuck to give really about Barbara since her 16 and Pregnant episode.

 

She's like that goofy aunt who comes to visit on occasion...the unreliable one who you never know if she'll really show up until she walks in the door because she rarely follows through with shit.  

 

Poor Babs.  Even worse, poor Jace.  

Edited September 26, 2014 by Persnickety1

[ghoulina]

Jenelle is irredeemable at this point. How is it that after the birth of Kaiser Soze,

 

Ooooh, I don't think we've used that one before. Love it!

 

Thank you for my belly laugh of the day.  Wasn't Jenelle nursing little Kaiser Roll when they came home from the hospital? I swear she was and she said something about pumping. But, last night both of them were making bottles with powdered formula. I guess nursing while laying in bed was just too exhausting.

 

Yup. Two weeks in and she already gave up. I'm surprised we didn't get a voice over to the effect of, "I'm so stressed with school and taking care of a newborn, I can't breastfeed him on top of it". Or maybe - "My feelings for nursing have dropped".

[DangerousMinds]

Or maybe she still smokes pot, and I'm sure she does, and would rather give up breastfeeding than pot. Easy decision for her.

Edited September 26, 2014 by DangerousMinds

[ghoulina]

Yea, you may be right about that. I suspected she was still doing stuff while pregnant. If that is the reason, I'm glad. 

[lovesnark]

Yea, you may be right about that. I suspected she was still doing stuff while pregnant. If that is the reason, I'm glad. 

Her totally flat affect has  made me wonder if she was either staying really stoned while she was pregnant or if she was on something prescribed. I'm clueless as to whether there would be anything a doctor would prescribe for whatever mental/anxiety disorder she claims to suffer from that would be considered safe to take during pregnancy. She's just emotionless unless she's screaming at Barb or Nipples.

[fliptopbox]

A friend of mine is currently pregnant and she's allowed to take meds for her anxiety. I think currently they're weaning her off Buspar to switch to Zoloft, and then she takes Ativan as needed. No idea on dosage though.

There are definitely psychiatric meds you can't take while pregnant but I think the basic anti-depressants and anti-anxiety meds are ok in certain doses.

[lovesnark]

A friend of mine is currently pregnant and she's allowed to take meds for her anxiety. I think currently they're weaning her off Buspar to switch to Zoloft, and then she takes Ativan as needed. No idea on dosage though.

There are definitely psychiatric meds you can't take while pregnant but I think the basic anti-depressants and anti-anxiety meds are ok in certain doses.

Thanks! It explains her emotionless, dead eyed affect the entire season. Might be part of the 'I can't do anything besides lay in bed or on the couch' lifestyle, too. Unless, of course, Nipples needs a ride somewhere.

[ghoulina]

Honestly, though, I don't know if Jenelle would be some bubbly, spirited person without any kind of drug/medication. Have we ever seen her 100% sober? I don't know. But I feel like she's been on so many different things over the years that she may have permanently fucked up her brain. 

Edited September 26, 2014 by ghoulina

[Ljohnson1987]

I would love to see Andrew reappear and try to get custody of Jace. He's probably more fit than Jenelle or Mongo will ever be.

[FozzyBear]

I would love to see Andrew reappear and try to get custody of Jace. He's probably more fit than Jenelle or Mongo will ever be.

Ehh. He hasn't had any contact with his son in almost 4 years, plus I thought he had some legal trouble (DUIs?), plus there are questions if he even is Jace's father. The sad thing is I don't think Jace has a good option. Barbara is the best he's got, but from where I stand she's a less than stellar parent. She really is incredibly negative and yells and starts arguments all the time. I can only imagine what is was like for her kids to grow up with a mom who's angry all the time. All 3 of her kids seem fucked up so as much as Janelle is a piece of shit, I don't think it's all her. She's the best Jace has, but man. That poor kid.

[ghoulina]

plus there are questions if he even is Jace's father.

 

Didn't they resolve that at one of the past reunions?

[wrestlesflamingos]

Yes, a DNA test was done, Andrew is the father. Barb quote from that event "The poor kid [Jace] doesn't stand a chance."

He hasn't had any contact with his son.

 

This. I cannot even recall a scene with Andrew and Jace in the same shot. He was out before she gave birth, they had the 'feelings dropped' talk and he was gone forever.

[StatisticalOutlier]

Barb quote from that event "The poor kid [Jace] doesn't stand a chance."

 

She should know, since it seems like Barbara is a big part of the reason that poor kid doesn't stand a chance.  

[sunflowers83823]

You guys you guys you guys! Turns out Nathan is a rocket scientist!

"Hello, My name is Nathan Griffith," the letter reads. "As we all know NASA has the best of the best when it comes to technology, economic advances and connections to some of the most brilliant minds the world has to offer. Knowing this, I'm sure someone has already thought about this idea or that it has been rejected due to technical flaws. Even saying that I would like to present my idea to NASA."

"As old or new satellites release transmitters through space, I think we should export an enhance telescope and modify a gun/cannon like object attach to it to project (shoot) a highly durable camera or transmitter," Nathan continues.

"The telescope will be use like a scope on a rifle. As I addressed before, Newton's first Law, space will allow the object to travel thousands of miles per hour through space until it reaches its destination. Allowing us to search for new discoveries outside our solar system."

http://www.wetpaint.com/teen-mom/articles/2014-09-12-nathan-griffith-writes-open-letter-nasa

Delusions of grandeur much?

I actually felt myself losing IQ points as I read it. My dad always said that if stupidity was painful every hospital would be full...if that were true, Nathan would be in intensive care.

Edited October 3, 2014 by sunflowers83823

[DangerousMinds]

The only "smart" thing Nathan has done is putting off a wedding. I think Jenelle would be happy to rush right into another marriage; she was engaged to Gary and married Courtland not long after meeting him. And Jenelle - just so you know, it's not a requirement to change your last name when/if you do get married again.

[SPLAIN]

The changing of the last name was STUPID!  When I married, I kept my last name. I didn't run to the social security office, didn't go to the DMV, none of that. I did use my spouse's last name for my business cards and on utility bills and of course, on invitations and things of that nature. I have a girlfriend who did the name change bit. I felt for her when she divorced and had to go through that process.

[rhofmovalley]

IMO, Nathan is attaching Kaiser to himself because he (Nathan) is planning at some point in time to leave Jenelle and take Kaiser with him.  Kaiser is money in the bank to Nathan...with Jenelle's MTV money, unemployed Nathan can get child support from Jenelle.  And Nathan can use Jenelle's drug use, arrest record and lack of custody of Jace against her.  Heck, maybe he plans to adopt Jace so he can use him as a moneymaker too, hence the push to get Jenelle to get him back from Barb.

 

Barb's smart enough to see through Nathan, which may be why he's so insistent on isolating Jenelle from her.  He has to keep them apart until he can put his master scheme into action.

 

Just my theory based on the fact that (from what we've seen) Nathan provides almost all care for Kaiser (and Jenelle's laziness and apathy make it easy for him to do so...heck, maybe Nathan's drugging her!).  And Jenelle acts like she's so afraid of losing Nathan she'll go along with anything to placate him, at least until he drops the bomb on her.

 

Also, I was watching an old episode the other day and had to laugh when Nathan "instructed" Jenelle's divorce lawyer to put all of Courtland's transgressions into the divorce filing.  Lawyer looked at Nathan as if to say "dude, you don't know shit, stop telling me how to do my job".  Guess Nathan thought he could dictate to the lawyer the same way he dictates to Jenelle.

[GreatKazu]

with Jenelle's MTV money

She has money? That girl is likely broke from all that crap she and Nathan have bought. The gas for the Hummer is likely a $120 a week. Even when Jenelle was paying Barb CS, it was only $130 a month. What a friggin' joke!

 

I have a strange feeling that Nathan is all over Kaiser because he is a boy. Some assholes are all about having a son, and I wouldn't put it past Nipples to act as if having a son is better than a daughter. You know, the one he already has but has no interest in taking care of. I know Nipples is not at all right in the head and as I mentioned before, he fucking scares me. I don't trust him and I could see him using that child much like Kail does with Isaac. It is a sick, sick game these bastards are playing.

[ghoulina]

I'm pretty sure Nathan actually said something about "a son" that made it fairly obvious that tickled him more than having a daughter would. I just can't remember...

[MissMel]

He said his "first born" and then added "son" after a noticeable pause.

Being unemployed and child support calculations is a little tricky. I'm a stay at home mother/wife and my income is calculated at minimum wage for 40 hours a week, by law. My ex was able to submit a hand written W-2 (W-4?, i cant keep those form names straight) stating he makes minimum wage for 20 hours a week. Which we all know is a lie but in court? You have to prove it. Jenelle's "work" is publicly known and her pay will be factored down to monthly earnings. Nathan will get calculated at a minimum wage, full time earnings scale.

It will be interesting how it plays out when they split.

[SPLAIN]

Jenelle, like the others, is a contract worker. She gets one check a year. She is not considered an employee of MTV. If she was only ordered by a judge to pay $100 a month to her own mother, while a contract worker for MTV, while Barb has Jace full-time, why would it be any different for Nipples?

Edited October 6, 2014 by SPLAIN

[fliptopbox]

I would expect that's because Barb didn't fight very hard for that child support. And she knows Jenelle is unreliable. Nathan on the other hand, seems like the type to come after her like a rabid dog for anything he can. Once they split he's likely to take Kaiser and disappear, except to show up in court and demand more money.

[rhofmovalley]

I agree, I think Nipples will abscond with Kaiser (and maybe even Jace, if he and Dope Fiend manage to convince Barb to submit to him living with them).  Nipples will claim he removed the children because their mother is a danger to them.  Then, he'll want the court to compensate him as their child care provider, plus he'll probably go after Jenelle for child support if she has any more MTV checks coming.

 

This is my prediction.  And I sincerely hope I'm dead, 100% wrong. 

[SPLAIN]

That was my point. Nipples will remain with Jenelle as long as she has MTV coming in. Once the show is done and over with (hope it is soon!) he won't hang around Jenelle any longer once they go through all of her money. Jenelle is not just a bed-warmer but she is also the one who provides Nipples with material things. He won't be able to acquire child support because Jenelle is too stupid and too lazy to get a career. Her money from this show will have dried up and she will end up back with mom. What will Nipples get from her? Nothing.

 

As for the court compensating Nipples, unless there is something I am not aware of, the courts don't compensate people who are supposed to care for their children. If Nipples runs off with his son, he should provide for him. Of course, that will mean the state and federal government will take on the load because this waste of space is receiving disability. Kaiser will probably get something from welfare and social security as a dependent of a disabled parent.

Edited October 6, 2014 by SPLAIN

[MissMel]

I need to correct myself, I forgot Nathan is collecting disability. His monthly earnings would be calculated at the amount of his benefits.

IF Nathan were to obtain custody, Jennelle would still owe child support. Even if she never earns another dime, she will still be responsible for monetary support. I haven't earned a paycheck in over 16 years but my monetary responsibility to my children is calculated at minimum wage pay rate for a 40 hour a week job. (my husband's pay is irrevelant as he not a biological parent to my children from my previous marriage.)

This is where it gets a little tricky. On paper, I earn more money than my ex. He supplied the court with documentation that states he earns minimum wage and works 20 hours a week. In other words, my responsibility is calculated at a full time wage and his is calculated at part time. Even though I don't earn an actual dime and he does earn actual pay. This is probably a similar setup to Jennelle and Barb's support agreement. Barb has a definitive income and Jennelle's income is easier to manipulate, on paper.

Now if Nathan is ever in a position to receive financial support from Jennelle, I have no problem thinking he would drag her into court if he even thinks she borrowed $20 from someone. He would want his share of that money. He seems like that kind of guy, to me.

[wrestlesflamingos]

He's the kind of guy that starts dating a married, junkie, reality tv show participant while she's experiencing the termination of her pregnancy. He's the kind of guy that plans a child with that junkie before her next period. He's the kind of guy that pulls into a strangers driveway late at night to evade the police. He's the kind of guy with a job that expires the moment someone else pays.

 

But hey, if I were writing about Janelle I could add a few paragraphs. They are exactly what each of them deserve and not a single bit good enough for anyone else.

[StatisticalOutlier]

He's the kind of guy that pulls into a strangers driveway late at night to evade the police.

 

I didn't realize that wasn't his own driveway.  It didn't make much sense that he was claiming the cops couldn't follow him onto private property, but at least I thought it was HIS private property he was declaring as some sort of King's X.  What an idiot.

[spidermiss2426]

http://www.mtv.com/news/1959540/jenelle-evans-academic-achievement/

 

Jenelle just got some sort of Academic Achievement.  Too bad she doesn't know that "You" isn't spelled "U"

[RedKoolAide]

I've always felt out of all the girls Jenelle had the most book smarts, but when it comes to common sense/street smarts she's dumb as hell. Barbara even said she was smart in one of the earlier seasons and she didn't understand why Jenelle didn't just focus on school.

[Persnickety1]

I agree, I think Nipples will abscond with Kaiser (and maybe even Jace, if he and Dope Fiend manage to convince Barb to submit to him living with them).  Nipples will claim he removed the children because their mother is a danger to them.  Then, he'll want the court to compensate him as their child care provider, plus he'll probably go after Jenelle for child support if she has any more MTV checks coming.

 

This is my prediction.  And I sincerely hope I'm dead, 100% wrong. 

 

I wonder if the push is because he wants to legally adopt Jace for whatever nefarious motive he may have spinning in his empty (yet frighteningly violent) brain...maybe just to have another way to keep Jenelle in line?

[BitterApple]

I always find it funny that the people who defend Jenelle couldn't put together a grammatically correct sentence if their lives depended on it. 

[Joe Jitsu913]

I think Jenelle is absolutely hopeless. I think she's a shitty person with no redeeming qualities. She actually believes with all of her arrests that she will have a career as a medical assistant? Bitch, please. Talk about druggie logic.

I also think she will have several more children by different baby daddies by the time she hits 30.

[ethalfrida]

I may be projecting a bit, but I think Janelle has a problem with self-loathing and poor self esteem...and while she is smart enough to excel in studies, and know the "right" thing to do, she continually sets herself up for failure (like hooking up with those losers).

I am not a Janelle apologist, but I think she would benefit from some intense therapy....maybe then she would parent her children and become a successful, relatively happy, active member of society.

But I am a hopeless optimist when it comes to other people....

I understand your point about Jenelle. After all, what type of support system did she grow up under? Probably the same type as Barbara who also could use intense therapy. 

[BitterApple]

I may be projecting a bit, but I think Janelle has a problem with self-loathing and poor self esteem...and while she is smart enough to excel in studies, and know the "right" thing to do, she continually sets herself up for failure (like hooking up with those losers).

No, I understand what you mean. Although I think Jenelle is dumb when it comes to men and life situations, I don't think she's Chelsea-dumb, where she suffers from zero book smarts and low IQ. I actually could see her passing her courses to become a medical assistant. I agree it's more that she puts herself in positions where she's going to get knocked down again and again.