S01.E04: Friday Night Dinner

[Drogo]

The aftermath of Eddie and Delilah’s secret takes a toll on everyone in the group, including the future of Delilah and Regina’s restaurant. Maggie and Gary’s relationship is tested when an old fling turns up, and Delilah struggles with the balance of protecting her children and keeping Jon’s memory alive.

[WhosThatGirl]

So the moral of this episode was: pizza fixes everything! 

And way to  steal Doctor K from TIU. 

[Lady Calypso]

I think the most frustrating part of this whole affair getting out is how different Delilah is treated compared to Eddie. I know that she's lost a husband and that is the greatest punishment and all, but not only Gary but Regina is treating Delilah like nothing happened. I know part of it is for her kids, but I'm frustrated with how easy Delilah's getting off on her part of the affair. Meanwhile, Katherine is still giving Eddie the cold shoulder, with them barely speaking at home (I guess she didn't kick him out for Theo) and he only got to speak to Gary a week later. 

I'm just frustrated that Jon's death has given Delilah a clear pass on her actions. It's why I hope, when Sophie inevitably finds out about the affair, that she won't be afraid to give her mom hell for her actions. 

So, Maggie's lying about her cancer relapse and Gary knows and is keeping it secret that he knows...I guess to try to give her the chance to tell him? And she's also now refusing treatment, which I hope only lasts until next episode because it's dumb for her to decide not to do it...I guess because she doesn't want the fun with Gary to stop? And speaking of, she's all fine and dandy with him when he takes off his shirt? I mean, I get him being self-conscious (and I liked the touch of him covering himself back up after sex), but Maggie taking her anger about her relapse out on Gary and saying that he'll never change and then changing her mind when he takes off his shirt was....weirdly handled. 

Not as much Eddie this time around, which is fine, but we do get a little glimpse into him and Katherine, though not enough to show how they got together and how they fell apart, besides the drinking. And it seems like Eddie's going to try to perform again and will likely relapse in...what, four or five episodes? 

Oh, and Rome quit his job so that he can make no money off of making a movie that might not go anywhere while Regina tries to build a resturant up with no money. That sounds like it'll be a smashing success. I mean, go for your dreams and all that, but maybe make sure you have a plan in place instead of winging it, especially when your wife is also starting her career.

I didn't hate the episode, but I didn't really like it much either. Too much Delilah and I figured out that I just don't like her. 

Also, all of this Jon's death stuff happened....less than two weeks ago now and we're getting these speeches about Delilah trying to protect Sophie and Danny, and how Delilah's been acting like everything's normal and....it's making it sound like a month has passed, not two weeks. Also, Sophie must not be a crier, which is fine, but I guess I always expect shows to have people as blubbering messes mere weeks after a death. I don't know whether it's ok writing or bad direction for the actress to act like her dad merely went away on a trip. 

[ParadoxLost]

I cannot stand Delilah.  How does forcing the wife of your lover to join you for dinner in front of her kid turn into a magnanimous gesture appreciated by the cheated on spouse and admired by others.

[readster]

3 minutes ago, ParadoxLost said:

I cannot stand Delilah.  How does forcing the wife of your lover to join you for dinner in front of her kid turn into a magnanimous gesture appreciated by the cheated on spouse and admired by others.

I call the the "King of the Hill" syndrome. Everyone knows what is going on, knows it's damaging and the other would be more hurt by it. However, the story ends up being: "Well, where is that my business to bring that all up?" When it comes off as: "You dumb ass, say something because in the end it's just worst." 

[memememe76]

I don't like that Delilah is getting a free pass from everyone either. It will be a first where I look forward to witnessing the teenaged daughter throwing a fit at her mom. And why aren't Katherine and Regina better friends, anyway? 

This show is sucking me in, however.

[vibeology]

19 minutes ago, ParadoxLost said:

I cannot stand Delilah.  How does forcing the wife of your lover to join you for dinner in front of her kid turn into a magnanimous gesture appreciated by the cheated on spouse and admired by others.

Katherine is a fucking angel! She is compassionate and invested in preserving Jon's legacy. The more I see of her the worse I think of Eddie and Delilah. Nothing I have seen matches the way Eddie and the guys have talked about her. Nothing. 

Delilah is a piece of shit for pushing that invite and Eddie is one for not immediately coming up with an excuse for their son. He could have easily taken the heat with their son to show his wife a moment of respect. 

[tennisgurl]

Delilah is a fucking asshole. I hate that she seems to get a free pass, while Eddie still gets the cold shoulder. I mean, Eddie deserves it, but it takes two to tango! As I said last week, I freaking hate the "my partner was busy with work and we grew apart" as an excuse to cheat, and I hate that fiction seems to act like thats a sympathetic reason to cheat. If your upset in your marriage, TALK! Dont bang your spouses married best friend! And, maybe its just because my dislike of Delilah is shining through, but her getting rid of Jons stuff seems less like she gets sad looking at it, but she was getting read to get rid of him anyway, and move her boyfriend in as the new dad. Eddie and Delilah both suck, but everyone bending over backwards to forgive and excuse Delilah is making hate her even more than Eddie. And Eddie is clearly also an asshole. And that invite? Gross. Screw both of them, they deserve each other. I just feel bad for their kids. 

That all being said, I am still very engaged in the show. I do also feel like not enough time has passed for how people are acting. I know that life goes on after a death, but everyone seems to be talking about moving on awfully quickly. 

[Athena5217]

I don’t think Delilah is getting a free pass. I think her friends just feel like it’s more important to help John’s family, including her, than it is to be mad at her. If they give her the cold shoulder, they end up staying away from the kids too.  When you love someone, you are there for them, even when it’s hard.

[ParadoxLost]

10 minutes ago, vibeology said:

Katherine is a fucking angel! She is compassionate and invested in preserving Jon's legacy. The more I see of her the worse I think of Eddie and Delilah. Nothing I have seen matches the way Eddie and the guys have talked about her. Nothing. 

It seems to be heading in the direction of Katherine being treated this way because of how the dynamic changed as she had to step and deal with Eddie's alcoholism.  

I wonder how pregnant Katherine will be when they blame her for how she handles Eddie's alcoholism. That she is flinching when he drinks is seems to point to him getting kicked out of the band when she is pregnant.  The birth probably gets him into a program.

[Lady Calypso]

17 minutes ago, Athena5217 said:

I don’t think Delilah is getting a free pass. I think her friends just feel like it’s more important to help John’s family, including her, than it is to be mad at her. If they give her the cold shoulder, they end up staying away from the kids too.  When you love someone, you are there for them, even when it’s hard.

This is my true dilemma with Delilah and the whole situation. I think she's getting a free pass, at least in terms of the writing. Delilah lost her husband and has kids to take care of now, which means that everyone else would look like assholes to yell at her when Jon's body is still warm in the ground. But we haven't seen someone get really pissy at her. Regina got to give her the silent treatment but then the first interaction they have, it makes it seem like Delilah's playing the victim. Yeah, I'm aware that Delilah has expressed remorse and guilt for her actions, but when other characters respond by giving her sad eyes, it just...bugs me. 

And yeah, Gary told Eddie that they could come back from this, but they didn't end the episode being best friends again. Gary acknowledges that their friendship can be repaired, but it's also made clear that Eddie is not there yet. While with Delilah, she's still laughing about things with Gary, whether or not the kids are around, and her and Regina are back to being chatty. 

At least Regina got to talk with Katherine at the end of the episode. I was afraid she was forgotten about again. 

[DearEvette]

I did not like this episode as much as last week's.  It felt like now that the affair had been revealed, we needed to wallow in it a bit.  And that required everyone wanting to be there for Delilah to honor Jon.  And I am sorry, but they all just found out a week ago.  Katherine should be allowed to have her anger and feel as upset as she needs to for as long as she needs to about the betrayal and not have that shortcut because everyone feels the need to let it go because of they want to eat pizza.

I am not at all invested in Maggie and her cancer.  She feels like she is in a different show.  Frankly crazy hippie chick with the long braids was more charismatic in her few minutes on screen that Maggie has been this whole time.

And Finally, it has been two (?) weeks since Jon's death.  Delilah is a stay at home mom, I assume.  So shouldn't she be a little more concerned about how she and the kids are set going forward?   Ashley found the life insurance policies, but does Delilah even know about them?  Have we even heard her ask about one or even  a will?

The pacing is giving me fits.  Outside of the affair reveal, no forward momentum has happened on the show.  We still have no more clues than we did two episodes ago about why Jon killed himself.  And as far as the affair reveal is concerned, neither Eddie nor Delilah have suffered any real consequences from it as we saw with the Slo Mo friends smiling while eating pizza montage.  All seems to have been forgiven.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

I am firmly on Katherine's side forever since she prevented their adorable child from being named Milton.

I felt bad for both Delilah and Sophie. I understand why Delilah suggested donating some of Jon's clothes to Goodwill because duh. I also understand why Sophie wants to keep his stuff. I think a good compromise would be letting Sophie go through his stuff and letting her keep some of it (but with the understanding that this was not carte blanche to say she wanted to keep ALL of his stuff). People grieve in different ways and on different time tables so it's fine that Delilah doesn't feel the need to keep all of his things and it's also fine that Sophie wants to hang on to them.

Normally I would not be down with an executive assistant babysitting her boss's (not sick) kid, but since I know Ashley just wants access to the house for her nefarious deeds, I'm going to go with it.

Hee, I love that Gary knows the proper wait to pronounce açaí. It's been around long enough to know that, Eddie! Sorry, that's just a pet peeve of mine, mostly because I've heard so many people mangle the pronunciation over the years.

Regina is great. I love that her immediate reaction to Rome's outburst about how much he hates his job and wants to quit so that he could work on his movie was to tell him then that's what he should do. He had built it up so much in his head that he was convinced she would say no because they need the money but instead she just wants him to be happy.

I have never loved Maggie as much as when Rebecca told her that gluten is horrible for your adrenals and Maggie's response was to take a huge bite of said cookie.

[Dusty]

7 hours ago, ParadoxLost said:

It seems to be heading in the direction of Katherine being treated this way because of how the dynamic changed as she had to step and deal with Eddie's alcoholism.  

I wonder how pregnant Katherine will be when they blame her for how she handles Eddie's alcoholism. That she is flinching when he drinks is seems to point to him getting kicked out of the band when she is pregnant.  The birth probably gets him into a program.

This is what I was thinking. It has to be more than she just became more distant from the group because she's working all the time and Gary really doesn't like her. We don't know yet if that was always the case and the flashbacks didn't really show much but she seemed part of their little group.

The show is weird that not much time has past but it feels like it has because they just rush through the emotional and character parts to move the overall story along. I wish they would just slow it down a little bit.

[Seelouis]

Delilah’s accent is driving me nuts.  Especially now that we have met her dad who is clearly not French.  Is there some back story still to come or are they just expecting us to ignore the actress’ accent?  

Edited October 18, 2018 by Seelouis

[doodlebug]

4 minutes ago, Seelouis said:

Delilah’s accent is driving me nuts.  Especially now that we have met her dad who is clearly not French.  Is there some back story still to come or are they just expecting us to ignore the actress’ accent?  

When they said she meant Jon in the airport when she was flying to France; I was hoping we'd hear that her mother was French and that she'd spent much of her childhood living there; hence, her obvious accent.  It ain't that hard to explain stuff like that; I find it hard to believe that TPTB thought she could pass for a native born American, her English is very good but she definitely has a French accent.

[woodstock]

2 hours ago, ElectricBoogaloo said:

I am firmly on Katherine's side forever since she prevented their adorable child from being named Milton.

I felt bad for both Delilah and Sophie. I understand why Delilah suggested donating some of Jon's clothes to Goodwill because duh. I also understand why Sophie wants to keep his stuff. I think a good compromise would be letting Sophie go through his stuff and letting her keep some of it (but with the understanding that this was not carte blanche to say she wanted to keep ALL of his stuff). People grieve in different ways and on different time tables so it's fine that Delilah doesn't feel the need to keep all of his things and it's also fine that Sophie wants to hang on to them.

HA! I've only known two men named Milton and they were older gentlemen. Not saying anything is wrong with the name but I just can't picture a newborn or child named Milton.

I'm glad Sophie told Delilah that she felt as though Delilah was trying to make Jon disappear (even though that wasn't Delilah's intention). I agree that Sophie (and Daniel) should be able to keep some things of their dad's.

I cracked up during Gary and Rome's  - "Why are we talking in code?" chat.

Regina, Rome and Katherine are the characters I'm most invested in right now.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

18 minutes ago, doodlebug said:

When they said she meant Jon in the airport when she was flying to France; I was hoping we'd hear that her mother was French and that she'd spent much of her childhood living there; hence, her obvious accent.  It ain't that hard to explain stuff like that; I find it hard to believe that TPTB thought she could pass for a native born American, her English is very good but she definitely has a French accent.

I assumed she was French from the first episode because of her obvious accent. The only other possibility I considered was that she was Quebecois (I don't know enough to be able to distinguish between a French and Quebecois accent).

[doodlebug]

15 minutes ago, ElectricBoogaloo said:

I assumed she was French from the first episode because of her obvious accent. The only other possibility I considered was that she was Quebecois (I don't know enough to be able to distinguish between a French and Quebecois accent).

Yep, it would be nice if they'd just drop a mention into the script soon to explain the accent so we can stop wondering about it.  Now that they've made her father an American, her mother is the only option.

[HazelEyes4325]

Well, that was....ridiculous.

I was hoping that the show was on an upswing after last week's episode, but apparently not. 

I did like the Rome and Regina scenes and, honestly, I'd be all here for just the Rome/Regina show.  I do hope that they give Regina more to do than just being the trope-ish "black best friend."  I think Christina Moses is capable of so much more than they've given here.  And Rome's story is the one that should central to what we are seeing, not Eddie and Delilah's sexcapades or Gary and Maggie's cancer.

And now we've seen that Jon was a horrible husband.  Except...he wasn't.  He was a guy who was stressed out from work and had to deal with a PITA FIL who has Alzheimer's.  Sorry, but I can't jump on the "but life for Delilah was SO HARD" excuse after what we just saw. 

Also, what exactly was the point of bringing Dr. K on, except to try to woo TIU fans?  Even with its myriad of flaws, I think this is a better show, but it just won't succeed if it keeps willingly putting itself in TIU's shadow.

While I like the general Gary/Maggie story, the writing really bugged me.  Okay, the writing bugged me for this entire episode, but I seemed to notice it especially here.  I'm wondering--has D.J. Nash ever actually met a female?  Because he can't write them.   In that scene where Maggie was leaving the church after finding out that she was not the first of Gary's bathroom conquests I just keep thinking, "A woman would not be talking like this..."  Then, in her scene with Rome, it was fine...but it felt like the scene was written for Rome and Gary and they just swapped out one of the parties.

Oh, Katherine...you are a Queen among women in a completely and utterly mythic in the most eye-rolling sense.  Last week I didn't have a problem buying her controlled manner.  This week, it was completely unbelievable.  I'm not saying she should have been screaming and foaming at the mouth, but she was so far beyond the line of realism in how nice and understanding and all that I wanted to throw my tablet against the wall.

And, I'm sorry, but NO!  The fact that everyone is sitting down happily to a meal together is just not flying.  I don't think even the Hallmark channel could get away with shit like that.  Any goodwill I had going was killed right then.

I guess I do have to give kudos for one thing--when I lived in Boston, the bartender at not one but TWO of my favorite haunts was also named Sully.  Maybe they are all named Sully so (wait for it!) everyone will know their name.

I dropped another new show from my viewing slate last night and am tempted to do the same with this one.  But I won't.  I do think the men are killing it and David Giuntoli is easy on the eyes, even his character is hard on the nerves.  

11 hours ago, ParadoxLost said:

I cannot stand Delilah.  How does forcing the wife of your lover to join you for dinner in front of her kid turn into a magnanimous gesture appreciated by the cheated on spouse and admired by others.

Yeah, that whole thing was just ridiculous.  Don't go out and announce, in front of someone else's kid (who loves pizza) that you are having pizza without expecting to give an invitation to everyone.  Of course, either of Theo's parents could have spoken up and said something along the lines of "no, we have other plans" and then taken Theo to someplace with a play structure or whatever.  Ugh!  So ridiculous!

Edited October 18, 2018 by HazelEyes4325

[topanga]

21 minutes ago, HazelEyes4325 said:

Oh, Katherine...you are a Queen among women in a completely and utterly mythic in the most eye-rolling sense.  Last week I didn't have a problem buying her controlled manner.  This week, it was completely unbelievable.  I'm not saying she should have been screaming and foaming at the mouth, but she was so far beyond the line of realism in how nice and understanding and all that I wanted to throw my tablet against the wall.

I like that we’re learning more about Katherine. So far, she’s my favorite character. But I hope the show doesn’t go too far and turn her into a saint. She is still the same character from the pilot who yelled about her assistant not reminding her about something and the same character who said, “I didn’t know this was an all-day thing,” at Jon’s funeral. That seems like a weird thing to say, knowing how close she felt to Jon. But I’m fine with Katherine being a multi-faceted character who’s not a bitch but can be bitchy sometimes.

I wonder if the chasm between Katherine and the Million Little Friends developed once Eddie started drinking heavily, got kicked out of the band, and Katherine had to balance raising a young son and working full time as a busy attorney—wow, that’s a lot. But the answers to this question might be more appropriate for the speculation thread.

21 minutes ago, HazelEyes4325 said:

While I like the general Gary/Maggie story, the writing really bugged me.  Okay, the writing bugged me for this entire episode, but I seemed to notice it especially here.  I'm wondering--has D.J. Nash ever actually met a female?  Because he can't write them.   In that scene where Maggie was leaving the church after finding out that she was not the first of Gary's bathroom conquests I just keep thinking, "A woman would not be talking like this..."  Then, in her scene with Rome, it was fine...but it felt like the scene was written for Rome and Gary and they just swapped out one of the parties.

I hated, hated the scene with Gary at Maggie’s apartment. Gary learned that Maggie’s breast cancer had returned, and she wouldn’t return his calls. So he went by her apartment, I thought, to support her and possibly encourage her to talk about her diagnosis. What does he do? Take off his shirt to show his scar, and they ended up having sex. Sure, she kissed him first, but couldn’t he have stopped her and said, “No. Let’s talk first.”? It seems like he originally went to Maggie’s apartment to be there for her, but then everything became all about him. 

And I don’t know personally, but do women generally get horny when their breast cancer recurs? Maybe she was using sex as a way NOT to think about her cancer, but this seems like something a man would do, not a woman —I’m not saying that a woman couldn’t do this, but Maggi’s actions surprised me. 

Speaking of Gary, meeeechiganman, he was wearing a Notre Dame t-shirt tonight—not Celtics, correct?. Still nothing Patriots, though. Wha-Whaa!

Edited October 18, 2018 by topanga

[Lady Calypso]

14 minutes ago, HazelEyes4325 said:

Oh, Katherine...you are a Queen among women in a completely and utterly mythic in the most eye-rolling sense.  Last week I didn't have a problem buying her controlled manner.  This week, it was completely unbelievable.  I'm not saying she should have been screaming and foaming at the mouth, but she was so far beyond the line of realism in how nice and understanding and all that I wanted to throw my tablet against the wall.

Katherine is the shining star of the series so far. I do think that it makes a little sense as to why she's not screaming and throwing Eddie's loser ass out on the streets (at least something that makes more sense than Gary being buddy-buddy and laughing with Delilah as if everything's ok). Katherine's trying to hold it together for Theo. At least her and Eddie have been shown to not be in a good place when Theo's not around. I can see Katherine compartmentalizing at home, and she does make it clear that she'd rather be anywhere but around Eddie...but it's their kid that stops her from going full ragey on him. 

Now, I know Delilah has children as well and her and Gary acting normally in front of them is their own way of protecting the kids, but even at the end of last episode, Gary was nice toward Delilah. Despite telling Rome that he wasn't mad at Delilah because "she wasn't there", he didn't yell at her or rage at her when he got the chance last episode without the kids around. They were eating cake together, for crying out loud! Plus, Delilah's excellent at playing the victim and it's working. See Regina softening up this episode toward her. 

Katherine's reaction is the only one I truly buy at the moment. She got to yell at Eddie last episode and I can buy her withholding her anger at home to protect Theo.

In this show, so far, with a ton of unrealistic reactions to things (hello to Maggie having sex with Gary after yelling at him all because he took his shirt off!), Katherine's isn't that unbelievable for me.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

What I found especially sweet about Katherine is that it’s not just that she doesn’t want to fight with Eddie in front of Theo - she still wants them to have a good relationship where Theo loves and admires his dad. When he came downstairs and asked if he could have pancakes for breakfast, she cheerfully said, “Dad makes the best pancakes!” I’ve seen other parents tell much younger children “Your mom/dad is a lying cheating piece of shit” so the fact that she is choosing not to bring the issues in her relationship with Eddie into Theo’s relationship with Eddie makes me like her more. I know it sounds like I’m setting the bar kind of low because she’s choosing not to be vindictive, but there are a lot of people (real and fictional) who can’t seem to do that. 

I didn’t see Gary taking off his shirt as an attempt to manipulate Maggie or make it about himself. To me it seemed that he was making himself vulnerable to her. She mentioned in a previous episode that he still hadn’t taken his shirt off during sex. This week she questioned whether that was just a tactic he used to get her (and other women in their group) to sleep with him. I think he was genuinely self-conscious about his scar. Showing it to her was his way of admitting that their relationship isn’t just a fun hookup and that he’s willing to show her something that makes him feel less than attractive. In addition, I think that his other hope was that by showing her that he was willing to be more serious with her, she would tell him that she was no longer in remission. 

[HazelEyes4325]

22 minutes ago, Lady Calypso said:

Katherine's reaction is the only one I truly buy at the moment. She got to yell at Eddie last episode and I can buy her withholding her anger at home to protect Theo.

 

I don't have a problem with Katherine (and Eddie) acting like nothing happened when Theo showed up.  I think many parents (but sadly not all) would do the same thing).  I also don't have a problem with her being friendly towards Sophie, but I found her Delilah-praising speech far too much to buy.  I'm not saying that she should have told Sophie that her mother was a skank whore, but a sort understanding but non-committal "mmm-hmm" would have done the job.  And then when she was just so thankful that she was included in a dinner party hosted by her husband's mistress?  Nope, not buying it AT ALL!

Jumping on the whole "Eddie is treated worse than Delilah" bandwagon here.  The reason why people seem to be so forgiving about Delilah is not that her husband is dead, but because she has said that her marriage was not happy.  First of all, I'm still not buying that Jon completely ignored her.  As I said above, the flashback did nothing to prove that point.  Secondly, why does that make it okay for Delilah, but not for Eddie, whose marriage everyone already knew was a disaster?

Also, when it comes to acting, I try to not write an actor or actress off as bad because, more often than not, it's more a problem with writing or directing and the actor is getting all the blame.  That being said, I'm going to say it.  Stephanie Szostak is a bad actress.  I don't get any sense of her character and half her lines are nonsensical.  There, I said it.

[HazelEyes4325]

31 minutes ago, topanga said:

And I don’t know personally, but do women generally get horny when their breast cancer recurs? Maybe she was using sex as a way NOT to think about her cancer, but this seems like something a man would do, not a woman —I’m not saying that a woman couldn’t do this, but Maggi’s actions surprised me. 

Hmm, not that I've heard.  In fact, I've kind of heard the opposite from people in my life who, unfortunately, are "in the know."  Some of them have said that the medications during treatment shut down their libido and it took a while, sometimes a long while, after they stopped taking the medications for it to come back.

[Lady Calypso]

2 minutes ago, HazelEyes4325 said:

I don't have a problem with Katherine (and Eddie) acting like nothing happened when Theo showed up.  I think many parents (but sadly not all) would do the same thing).  I also don't have a problem with her being friendly towards Sophie, but I found her Delilah-praising speech far too much to buy.  I'm not saying that she should have told Sophie that her mother was a skank whore, but a sort understanding but non-committal "mmm-hmm" would have done the job.  And then when she was just so thankful that she was included in a dinner party hosted by her husband's mistress?  Nope, not buying it AT ALL!

It seems like Sophie is close to Eddie and Katherine, so I can see Katherine wanting to be nice to Sophie, as it's not her fault her mother is a cheater. I don't mind Katherine wanting to protect Sophie for a little bit. Yeah, praising Delilah was bullshit, but I see Katherine wanting to ease Sophie into the news once it comes out. Plus, it's not surprising as even KATHERINE isn't mad at Delilah like everyone's mad at Eddie! 

By the way, Gary, Bro Code my ass. Having THAT as the reason you're mad at Eddie and not at Delilah is unbelievable to me. You don't care that Eddie was cheating, but you do care that it was with one of the other wives. 

I don't deny that the last scene with everyone at Pizza Night was unrealistic as well, at least showing them happy. Even if they're faking it for the kids, there should be more tension.

10 minutes ago, HazelEyes4325 said:

Jumping on the whole "Eddie is treated worse than Delilah" bandwagon here.  The reason why people seem to be so forgiving about Delilah is not that her husband is dead, but because she has said that her marriage was not happy.  First of all, I'm still not buying that Jon completely ignored her.  As I said above, the flashback did nothing to prove that point.  Secondly, why does that make it okay for Delilah, but not for Eddie, whose marriage everyone already knew was a disaster?

I think it goes hand in hand; because Jon is dead, and because everyone's thought is "what if he knew", they feel like they can't be mad about it. And because he's not around to tell his side, then maybe it was true. I do think we'll see more of Jon's flaws over the next few episodes. I appreciate that we got a less than perfect Jon in the flashback. Unlike TIU's Jack Pearson, they seem to not be afraid to show Jon's rougher edges.

[SunnyBeBe]

I understand that enduring another round of cancer treatment is daunting and very hard on a person, but, still, Maggie is so young.  I'm wondering why she is so opposed to the treatments.  When she met with her doctor, she didn't even say why she felt that way or what her motivation is to not seek further treatments.  She just asked about how much time she has left.  I wish the doctor had asked her to share her feelings about it, so we could get more of where she's coming from. Of course,it's her right to forego any further treatments, but, I wish I knew why.  

[possibilities]

2 hours ago, HazelEyes4325 said:

I'd be all here for just the Rome/Regina show

Me, too! They, and Katherine, seem like the only adults on the show. I also like the kids. Maybe Rome, Regina, Katherine, and the kids can move in together, and form a new family. Then Gary, Maggie, Eddie, and Delilah can live happily ever after in a collective household/bed-swapping extravaganza. Ashley can join them, since she seems to want to. Everybody wins!

[DoubleUTeeEff]

36 minutes ago, SunnyBeBe said:

I understand that enduring another round of cancer treatment is daunting and very hard on a person, but, still, Maggie is so young.  I'm wondering why she is so opposed to the treatments.  When she met with her doctor, she didn't even say why she felt that way or what her motivation is to not seek further treatments.  She just asked about how much time she has left.  I wish the doctor had asked her to share her feelings about it, so we could get more of where she's coming from. Of course,it's her right to forego any further treatments, but, I wish I knew why.  

When she was talking to Rome she mentioned people who were suicidal say "It's not that I don't want to live; it's that I don't want to live like this." I think for her treatment is the "like this." Plus, maybe each time the cancer returns it's less likely to go into remission? So maybe it's a bigger burden for a smaller chance at success.

Delilah is the worst. My hatred for her has been cemented this episode.

I don't know if I'm just an unforgiving person but there is no way if I were Katherine that I would go to that pizza party. Especially since it hadn't been that long. If Eddie were my husband and he wanted to go I wouldn't stop him, but then I'd know what his priorities were and take the next necessary steps. 

I'm glad Rome finally spoke up and is pursuing his movie idea. Regina is right, they don't have kids and they can move to a cheaper place in order for him to do his thing. It's obvious he can't keep going the way he has been so good for him.

[Lady Calypso]

2 minutes ago, DoubleUTeeEff said:

I don't know if I'm just an unforgiving person but there is no way if I were Katherine that I would go to that pizza party. Especially since it hadn't been that long. If Eddie were my husband and he wanted to go I wouldn't stop him, but then I'd know what his priorities were and take the next necessary steps. 

Same, but I think Katherine went only so that Theo wouldn't be suspicious that his parents weren't on good terms. Again, it seems like all of Katherine's choices do stem around Theo and protecting him.

40 minutes ago, SunnyBeBe said:

I understand that enduring another round of cancer treatment is daunting and very hard on a person, but, still, Maggie is so young.  I'm wondering why she is so opposed to the treatments.  When she met with her doctor, she didn't even say why she felt that way or what her motivation is to not seek further treatments.  She just asked about how much time she has left.  I wish the doctor had asked her to share her feelings about it, so we could get more of where she's coming from. Of course,it's her right to forego any further treatments, but, I wish I knew why.  

Yeah, at first before the end, I thought that she didn't want treatment because she wanted something to really fight for and she had nothing. But when she had sex with Gary, I did think that she'd choose to start treatment because of her growing feelings and realizing fighting to stay with Gary was worth it. Which is why it surprised me when she threw out the treatment plan, so now I'm confused.

[SunnyBeBe]

19 minutes ago, Lady Calypso said:

Same, but I think Katherine went only so that Theo wouldn't be suspicious that his parents weren't on good terms. Again, it seems like all of Katherine's choices do stem around Theo and protecting him.

Yeah, at first before the end, I thought that she didn't want treatment because she wanted something to really fight for and she had nothing. But when she had sex with Gary, I did think that she'd choose to start treatment because of her growing feelings and realizing fighting to stay with Gary was worth it. Which is why it surprised me when she threw out the treatment plan, so now I'm confused.

Yeah, maybe, we won't be told why or maybe, it's actually, A Million Little Things that is why she foregoes treatment.  lol Not to be cruel, but, I hope they (correction to: don't) leave her decision like Jon's....and we aren't given very much about it. 

Edited October 18, 2018 by SunnyBeBe

[DoubleUTeeEff]

6 minutes ago, Lady Calypso said:

Same, but I think Katherine went only so that Theo wouldn't be suspicious that his parents weren't on good terms. Again, it seems like all of Katherine's choices do stem around Theo and protecting him.

Definitely, otherwise I think she would have kicked Eddie out of the house. Still, she could have made up a work thing to get out of the party if Eddie wasn't going to step up and turn Delilah down. A work thing sounds like it would have been in character for Katherine. Then Eddie and Theo could still go and at least Theo would have been happy.

[possibilities]

Did they say what the odds were forMaggie's treatment being successful? And how many rounds of chemo/etc she'd already been through? That could also influence her decision. And maybe she was already depressed before her diagnosis, and this is just one more straw on her camel and she's done.

I don't think she will be able to get away with doing nothing without Gary and the others challenging her about why, though. Jon was able to hide his plans. But Gary knows she's got cancer, and at some point if she's not treating it, he's going to say something.

Rome didn't tell Regina about his suicide attempt. I've been bothered that his buddies have been kind of acting like it didn't happen even after they knew about it. If I had a friend who almost offed herself, I'd be way more concerned than any of them seem, and I would not have let it stay a secret from their spouse. If I was Regina, I'd be very upset to find out I'd been the last to know, that everyone kept it from me, and that even those who knew were not really doing anything about it.

I care about monogamy less than most people, so I can imagine getting over an affair. But I care about lying more than most people, too, and I don't know if I could get over all the secrets in this group. If you can't tell your spouse you're unhappy, and you will mostly ignore that someone almost killed themselves, it's hard for me to understand what basis you have for anyone to take you seriously as a person they are close to. These people claim to be each others' family, more or less. Yet they act like casual acquaintances who just hang ou for fun sometimes. They don't seem to have any desire for any kind of deeper connection than attending sports events and eating pizza. There's nothing wrong with friendships like that, but if half of you are either dead, dying, or suicidal, and the other half is lying or being lied to, I dunno. It's not really such a great bond as far as I can tell.

Edited October 18, 2018 by possibilities

[topanga]

3 minutes ago, SunnyBeBe said:

, I hope they leave her decision like Jon's....and we aren't given very much about it. 

Forever? Don’t you ever want to know Jon’s and Maggie’s motivations?

13 minutes ago, DoubleUTeeEff said:

When she was talking to Rome she mentioned people who were suicidal say "It's not that I don't want to live; it's that I don't want to live like this." I think for her treatment is the "like this." Plus, maybe each time the cancer returns it's less likely to go into remission? So maybe it's a bigger burden for a smaller chance at success.

Is Rome acting the same way he did 10 years ago when his life was probably happier? I know his friends had no idea about his current depression and suicidal ideations because he puts up a good front at hockey games and pizza dinners. But at home, there hasn’t been any change when it’s just Rome and Regina? He’s not quieter or more irritable or sadder than he used to be? I’m not saying Regina is a bad person for not knowing how Rome has been feeling. I’m just wondering if he keeps up his happy act 24 hours a day. If so, it must be exhausting for him.

5 minutes ago, possibilities said:

Rome didn't tell Regina about his suicide attempt. I've been bothered that his buddies have been kind of acting like it didn't happen even after they knew about it. If I had a friend who almost offed herself, I'd be way more concerned than any of them seem, and I would not have let it stay a secret from their spouse. If I was Regina, I'd be very upset to find out I'd been the last to know, that everyone kept it from me, and that even those who knew were not really doing anything about it.

I care about monogamy less than most people, so I can imagine getting over an affair. But I care about lying more than most people, too, and I don't know if I could get over all the secrets in this group. If you can't tell your spouse you're unhappy, and you will mostly ignore that someone almost killed themselves, it's hard for me to understand what basis you have for anyone to take you seriously as a person they are close to. These people claim to be each others' family, more or less. Yet they act like casual acquaintances who just hang ou for fun sometimes. They don't seem to have any desire for any kind of deeper connection than attending sports events and eating pizza. There's nothing wrong with friendships like that, but if half of you are either dead, dying, or suicidal, and the other half is lying or being lied to, I dunno. It's not really such a great bond as far as I can tell.

Well said. The bolded sentence made me laugh, even though it isn’t really funny at all. 

[SunnyBeBe]

2 minutes ago, topanga said:

Forever? Don’t you ever want to know Jon’s and Maggie’s motivations?

Is Rome acting the same way he did 10 years ago when his life was probably happier? I know his friends had no idea about his current depression and suicidal ideations because he puts up a good front at hockey games and pizza dinners. But at home, there hasn’t been any change when it’s just Rome and Regina? He’s not quieter or more irritable or sadder than he used to be? I’m not saying Regina is a bad person for not knowing how Rome has been feeling. I’m just wondering if he keeps up his happy act 24 hours a day. If so, it must be exhausting for him.

Corrected to say that I hope they don't leave the motivations for the suicide and Maggie foregoing treatment out. 

[Lady Calypso]

8 minutes ago, possibilities said:

Rome didn't tell Regina about his suicide attempt. I've been bothered that his buddies have been kind of acting like it didn't happen even after they knew about it. If I had a friend who almost offed herself, I'd be way more concerned than any of them seem, and I would not have let it stay a secret from their spouse. If I was Regina, I'd be very upset to find out I'd been the last to know, that everyone kept it from me, and that even those who knew were not really doing anything about it.

Which is why I think Rome could have a meltdown at some point, in the sense that all of his mediation is going to come to a point where he just can't anymore. He keeps being there for others, so when is it his turn to be able to get mad and feel sad and not feel the need to hide all of that?

Which...ok, now I can see why Maggie encouraged him to quit his job, so that he could be happy and do something for himself.

Regina is not going to be happy when she discovers Rome's suicide attempt and that several people knew before her.

10 minutes ago, possibilities said:

Did they say what the odds were forMaggie's treatment being successful? And how many rounds of chemo/etc she'd already been through? That could also influence her decision. And maybe she was already depressed before her diagnosis, and this is just one more straw on her camel and she's done.

She didn't seem to ask. The doctor had it all laid out in her treatment plan and all Maggie asked was about when she would die, essentially. You'd think, at that point, the doctor would tell her to take her own advice and go see a therapist.

[HazelEyes4325]

1 hour ago, Lady Calypso said:

I think it goes hand in hand; because Jon is dead, and because everyone's thought is "what if he knew", they feel like they can't be mad about it. And because he's not around to tell his side, then maybe it was true. I do think we'll see more of Jon's flaws over the next few episodes. I appreciate that we got a less than perfect Jon in the flashback. Unlike TIU's Jack Pearson, they seem to not be afraid to show Jon's rougher edges.

 

While we did get to see Jon's less than perfect side, nothing about that scene in any way made it look like he was ignoring his family or Delilah.  That seemed like a very run-of-the-mill confrontation in a functioning family.  Yet, people seem to buy the "my husband wasn't paying attention to me" line pretty darn easily while at the same time getting all over Eddie, whose marriage they (well, Gary...but loudly and often) called a shit show.  I'm not saying they need to let Eddie off the hook--although it seems they already have (eye roll), but I think Delilah needs to be held to the same standard.  And I think the fact that Jon is dead makes it even MORE unrealistic that they don't.

I wonder if they are ever going to explore the impact of the other people--again, mostly Gary--had on Eddie and Katherine's marriage.  Katherine knew she wasn't welcome and she knew that Gary doesn't like her and, from what we've seen, made a point of it constantly.  If two people are having trouble in a relationship and one person is constantly told by a 3rd person how horrible their partner is, that DOES play a role in things.  Also, Gary is kind of a shit to Eddie in general and I would really like to see Eddie stand up for himself at some point.

1 minute ago, Lady Calypso said:

She didn't seem to ask. The doctor had it all laid out in her treatment plan and all Maggie asked was about when she would die, essentially. You'd think, at that point, the doctor would tell her to take her own advice and go see a therapist.

 

They didn't mention it, but I go back to what Gary said in the first episode about cancer always being at the door.  Treatment can be a bitch and Maggie knows that.  She might just not want to go through it again.

[topanga]

4 minutes ago, Lady Calypso said:

She didn't seem to ask. The doctor had it all laid out in her treatment plan and all Maggie asked was about when she would die, essentially. You'd think, at that point, the doctor would tell her to take her own advice and go see a therapist.

It doesn’t help that Maggie has a shitty oncologist. No, they don’t all have to be Patch Adams with red clown noses, but most oncologists are a little more compassionate than he was. 

[HazelEyes4325]

1 hour ago, Lady Calypso said:

By the way, Gary, Bro Code my ass. Having THAT as the reason you're mad at Eddie and not at Delilah is unbelievable to me. You don't care that Eddie was cheating, but you do care that it was with one of the other wives. 

 

Yeah, the Bro Code is bullshit, but I do think there is more to Gary's reaction.  I don't think he had any designs on Delilah, despite his line last week asking why Eddie and not him.  Instead, Jon and Delilah were the fantasy of the thing that was never attainable for him--a functioning relationship.  In his eyes, Eddie broke that (even though Delilah is just a responsible! Grrr!).  I think, had this come out while Jon was alive, he would just as angry at Delilah, possibly more, as he is with Eddie.  In that scenario, there would be a victim--Jon--so Gary wouldn't have to feel like he had to be the victim.

[Lady Calypso]

1 minute ago, HazelEyes4325 said:

While we did get to see Jon's less than perfect side, nothing about that scene in any way made it look like he was ignoring his family or Delilah.  That seemed like a very run-of-the-mill confrontation in a functioning family.  Yet, people seem to buy the "my husband wasn't paying attention to me" line pretty darn easily while at the same time getting all over Eddie, whose marriage they (well, Gary...but loudly and often) called a shit show.  I'm not saying they need to let Eddie off the hook--although it seems they already have (eye roll), but I think Delilah needs to be held to the same standard.  And I think the fact that Jon is dead makes it even MORE unrealistic that they don't.

Oh yeah, I don't buy a WORD of what Delilah is selling. What I meant was that the other characters may think that Delilah could be right since they don't have Jon's side of the story, so that's why they're quick to forgive her.

 Just like Eddie's a master liar, Delilah's a master manipulator. I think Jon and her did have problems, but Delilah's only telling her side of the story; she has a very clear bias in this, so it likely wasn't as bad as she makes it out to be. Eddie is getting what he deserves, for sure. He could be kicked out of the house if Katherine really can't stand being with him, but right now, the only thing holding that marriage together is Theo. Eddie hasn't spoken to any of his friends in a week and Pizza Night was the first chance to start to open those doors again. But with Delilah? It's as if she had no role in the affair, so she's not even let off the hook for Gary....since she was never on the hook to begin with!

Delilah's complained about Regina ignoring her, but what's worse is that both Gary and Rome judged Regina for not being there for Delilah. Again, it's the way the show handles the treatment of both Eddie and Delilah. They have held Eddie accountable, even if it seems like they're moving through the process too quickly. At least the show is shitting on him a little bit and making it clear that he's not forgiven yet. But Delilah is getting off scot-free and I'm not sure whether she'll continue to suffer no repercussions, or because they're delaying it for Sophie finding out. 

11 minutes ago, HazelEyes4325 said:

I wonder if they are ever going to explore the impact of the other people--again, mostly Gary--had on Eddie and Katherine's marriage.  Katherine knew she wasn't welcome and she knew that Gary doesn't like her and, from what we've seen, made a point of it constantly.  If two people are having trouble in a relationship and one person is constantly told by a 3rd person how horrible their partner is, that DOES play a role in things.  Also, Gary is kind of a shit to Eddie in general and I would really like to see Eddie stand up for himself at some point.

I think we will. It's only episode 4 and I think they're trying to slowly tell those stories. Rome and Gary don't seem to like Eddie that much. He's always seemed like the odd guy out.

[SunnyBeBe]

It's great that Rome gets to quit his job and work on his dream project. But, at the same time as his wife is pursuing her dream of getting a new restaurant off the ground?  Do they know even realize how many new restaurants don't make it and how they can't expect any profit for at least a year? Just wondering, because quitting your job with no income, EVEN if you downsize sounds bizarre to me.  I've never had that luxury. so perhaps, I'm jealous.

 And what about health insurance? Do they have large savings to rely on? Much equity in the house?   Of course, quitting the job is preferable to suicide, but, is making commercials that taxing on the spirit that it would drive you to take your own life?  IDK....I wonder if Rome knows that making a film is full of a lot of BS too and it's really stressful and may not end up like he wants.  He really seems to not think realistically.  It's nice his wife supports him though.  If not, he might have really lost it. But, on the inside, I wonder if she thought.....man, you're selfish.  Just when I'm building my dream, I'm going to have to lose it, because my husband doesn't like his job. 

[HazelEyes4325]

1 hour ago, Lady Calypso said:

Delilah's complained about Regina ignoring her, but what's worse is that both Gary and Rome judged Regina for not being there for Delilah. Again, it's the way the show handles the treatment of both Eddie and Delilah. They have held Eddie accountable, even if it seems like they're moving through the process too quickly. At least the show is shitting on him a little bit and making it clear that he's not forgiven yet. But Delilah is getting off scot-free and I'm not sure whether she'll continue to suffer no repercussions, or because they're delaying it for Sophie finding out. 

 

I didn't even pick up on them getting on Regina's case when I watched this, but you're right.  And that scene between Regina and Delilah infuriated me--it seemed like Delilah was furious with Regina for being mad at her.  And then, of course , Regina is the one who has to go and try to repair the relationship.  As far as I can tell, the only person calling Delilah on anything is her daughter.

[topanga]

1 hour ago, Lady Calypso said:

Just like Eddie's a master liar, Delilah's a master manipulator. I think Jon and her did have problems, but Delilah's only telling her side of the story; she has a very clear bias in this, so it likely wasn't as bad as she makes it out to be. Eddie is getting what he deserves, for sure. He could be kicked out of the house if Katherine really can't stand being with him, but right now, the only thing holding that marriage together is Theo. Eddie hasn't spoken to any of his friends in a week and Pizza Night was the first chance to start to open those doors again. But with Delilah? It's as if she had no role in the affair, so she's not even let off the hook for Gary....since she was never on the hook to begin with!

Regina certainly held her accountable for her actions. 

And I agree that no marriage or husbands are perfect, but I think Delilah lied when she said Jon was never there, either physically or emotionally. He certainly was there for Sophie—he was at her dance rehearsals, practiced the dance with her at home, and he helped out with her softball team. And he was home for dinner very Friday night, even if he occasionally had to take a work call. Maybe she meant that he was never there for her personally, which makes me wonder about the problems in their long marriage before the affair. 

But I also know what it’s like to be married to someone who’s jovial and charismatic around friends and other family members, but at home behind closed doors, he barely speaks. People tell me I must laugh constantly around my husband, and I always answer, “Yeah. My face hurts.” Thanks, City Slickers. LOL 

Edited October 18, 2018 by topanga

[Lady Calypso]

25 minutes ago, topanga said:

And I agree that no marriage or husbands are perfect, but I think Delilah lied when she said Jon was never there, either physically or emotionally. He certainly was there for Sophie—he was at her dance rehearsals, practiced the dance with her at home, and he helped out with her softball team. And he was home for dinner very Friday night, even if he occasionally had to take a work call. Maybe she meant that he was never there for her personally, which makes me wonder about the problems in their long marriage before the affair. 

That's what I assume she meant. She talked about him being there for others but what she was complaining about was him not being there for HER. Hence why she cheated, I guess. In her mind, she was ignored by Jon so she felt lonely and like she wasn't in a marriage to him. We haven't really seen it, but I assume we'll get more examples of her being right. I'm not sure whether we're supposed to root for Delilah and feel sorry for her, or not like her. I don't like her, but I don't think I'm supposed to feel that way toward her.

26 minutes ago, topanga said:

Regina certainly held her accountable for her actions. 

Regina did for a bit but the way they've handled Regina's treatment toward Delilah is certainly softer than other characters handling Eddie. She seemed disappointed, more than angry. And I don't think it helps when Delilah starts using her manipulation tactics with the whole "I'm responsible and all of you blame me for Jon's death!" I think there's a difference between taking responsibility for your actions and using self deprecation as a manipulation tactic, and I think Delilah teeters that line a lot. 

[Sandman]

16 hours ago, vibeology said:

Katherine is a fucking angel! She is compassionate and invested in preserving Jon's legacy. The more I see of her the worse I think of Eddie and Delilah. Nothing I have seen matches the way Eddie and the guys have talked about her. Nothing. 

I think we have seen Katherine's need to be in control -- obviously she feels that Eddie's not pulling his weight financially in their marriage ("Someone's got to pay the mortgage" is a classic passive aggressive move), and she clearly has enough compassion (and, y'know, is adult enough) not to take her anger at Delilah out on Sophie, but mostly I thought her comment about how Jon was still making sure she was included was weirdly tone-deaf; almost a slap in Regina's face, since it was Regina, and not Dear Sainted Jon, who was actually apologizing in that moment.

I agree that Gina is holding Delilah accountable, without making Delilah and Eddie's affair all about her (which is what Gary is doing, though I see what it means for him). I think Delilah's dissatisfaction in her marriage was more than just "my partner's busy with work and has no time for me" -- her husband was so much invested in being there for everyone else -- and he pretty much tells her so, in so many words -- that Delilah ceased to be a priority for him at all. That's different order of problem, I think. (I think Jon's letter to her -- which Delilah still hasn't seen, thank you very much, Ashley! -- might actually have addressed this, which is adding to my impatience to see where this part of the plot is going. )

[Lovecat]

17 hours ago, Lady Calypso said:

So, Maggie's lying about her cancer relapse and Gary knows and is keeping it secret that he knows...I guess to try to give her the chance to tell him? And she's also now refusing treatment, which I hope only lasts until next episode because it's dumb for her to decide not to do it...

 

4 hours ago, SunnyBeBe said:

I understand that enduring another round of cancer treatment is daunting and very hard on a person, but, still, Maggie is so young.  I'm wondering why she is so opposed to the treatments.  When she met with her doctor, she didn't even say why she felt that way or what her motivation is to not seek further treatments.  She just asked about how much time she has left.  I wish the doctor had asked her to share her feelings about it, so we could get more of where she's coming from. Of course,it's her right to forego any further treatments, but, I wish I knew why.  

 

4 hours ago, DoubleUTeeEff said:

When she was talking to Rome she mentioned people who were suicidal say "It's not that I don't want to live; it's that I don't want to live like this." I think for her treatment is the "like this." Plus, maybe each time the cancer returns it's less likely to go into remission? So maybe it's a bigger burden for a smaller chance at success.

 

3 hours ago, possibilities said:

Did they say what the odds were forMaggie's treatment being successful? And how many rounds of chemo/etc she'd already been through? That could also influence her decision. And maybe she was already depressed before her diagnosis, and this is just one more straw on her camel and she's done.

I don't think she will be able to get away with doing nothing without Gary and the others challenging her about why, though. Jon was able to hide his plans. But Gary knows she's got cancer, and at some point if she's not treating it, he's going to say something.

 

3 hours ago, Lady Calypso said:

She didn't seem to ask. The doctor had it all laid out in her treatment plan and all Maggie asked was about when she would die, essentially. You'd think, at that point, the doctor would tell her to take her own advice and go see a therapist.

 

3 hours ago, HazelEyes4325 said:

They didn't mention it, but I go back to what Gary said in the first episode about cancer always being at the door.  Treatment can be a bitch and Maggie knows that.  She might just not want to go through it again.

Without getting too much into my own situation, whether to pursue treatment or not can be a VERY difficult decision to make, based on what previous posters have said, and more.  Everyone loves a warrior, and it's easy to say yes, of course you should fight for your life.  No one has a crystal ball; 6 months of hell could mean another 20...or you could still be gone within a year, having wasted that precious time being sick.  We don't know anything about Maggie's history, or her prognosis now that there's been a re-occurrence, and we don't know whether her priority is overall survival or quality of life.  Choosing to forgo treatment isn't quitting, it isn't letting the cancer win; it's taking control of your life, and maintaining some dignity in your death.  There's something to be said for enjoying the time you have left to the best of your ability.  I think we'll learn more about Maggie's motivations in coming episodes.  

[doodlebug]

4 hours ago, possibilities said:

Did they say what the odds were forMaggie's treatment being successful? And how many rounds of chemo/etc she'd already been through? That could also influence her decision. And maybe she was already depressed before her diagnosis, and this is just one more straw on her camel and she's done.

In general, once a cancer like breast cancer recurs, it is no longer curable.  However, depending on where the recurrence is, how fast it is growing as well as stuff like whether the tumor is sensitive to estrogen and what other genetic markers it may contain; a patient could have many years of good quality survival.  It happens all the time, just as it can also happen that the tumor is very aggressive, doesn't respond well to the standard treatments and isn't amenable to hormonal or immune therapies and the patient dies fairly soon.  It can also depend on how symptomatic the recurrence is.  For example, when a tumor like breast cancer spreads into the bones, it causes a lot of pain while a spread into the lymph nodes is fairly pain free.  A patient suffering severe pain may be more willing to undergo therapy to try to at least relieve the pain somewhat even if their time is short while someone with a relatively painless recurrence may not want to undergo aggressive therapy in order to get a couple of months more.

A friend was diagnosed with advanced colon cancer earlier this year.  He saw an oncologist who was very frank with him, told him he might be able to get a few months more with chemotherapy but his quality of life might not be very good.  Otherwise, he probably only had a few weeks.  He opted not to treat the cancer and died a couple weeks later.  Those sorts of decisions happen all the time in oncology. 

I did think the oncologist was not terribly helpful and most big hospital cancer units use an integrated approach where Maggie would also be seen by a social worker and perhaps a chemo nurse or a radiation tech to help her understand the consequences.  It also would've been nice if the doc had given her (and us) some idea of the odds with aggressive therapy which might make it easier to understand her choice. 

[Athena5217]

8 hours ago, Seelouis said:

Delilah’s accent is driving me nuts.  Especially now that we have met her dad who is clearly not French.  Is there some back story still to come or are they just expecting us to ignore the actress’ accent?  

I’m glad to know this is not just me.  I think it is just the actress slipping because I only notice it sometimes.  I wish they’d just give her a French backstory. I’m fine with a character having a French accent as long as it makes sense for them to have one.

[pianogirl73]

I can't stand Delilah and I love Katherine!

I think Katherine was complimenting Delilah to Sophie because that is what Sophie needed to hear abut her mother. It had nothing to do with Katherine and Eddie and everything to do with what Sophie needed.

[DearEvette]

4 hours ago, Sandman said:

I think Delilah's dissatisfaction in her marriage was more than just "my partner's busy with work and has no time for me" -- her husband was so much invested in being there for everyone else -- and he pretty much tells her so, in so many words -- that Delilah ceased to be a priority for him at all. That's different order of problem,

This is actually a good point.

I  just still can' get over that if Eddie and Delilah were so unhappy in their respective marriages, so much so that they had to have an affair with someone, then they had all of Boston to choose from.  But they had to have an affair with each other.  It is almost as if they wanted to hurt their respective spouses even more.  And if Delilah was feeling so abandoned by Jon and Eddie was feeling so over-controlled by Katherine the subconscious need to give that extra little fuck you to their spouses could very well have been an motivating factor than just "oh we fell in love and couldn;t help ourselves"

Edited October 19, 2018 by DearEvette