Faux Life: Things That Happen On TV But Not In Reality

[kiddo82]

Everyone also has a passport so they can board a Dramatic Plane at the last minute. Plus shitloads of money to buy that last minute ticket to Yemen.

Sir, a ticket to Yemen is $2,100 and we don’t take library cards.

Carry on.

[Rick Kitchen]

Don't most characters pull that wad of money out of their pockets, instead of their wallets?

[Kromm]

Don't most characters pull that wad of money out of their pockets, instead of their wallets?

Yeah, that's what I meant when I mentioned money clips (holding those wads together).

[MaryPatShelby]

I think I've been watching too many procedurals lately.....Only On TV will the detectives show up on some random NY college campus ("Hudson University"), and the very person they need to talk to, for whom they don't have a description, is right there walking along the sidewalk.  And as we've already discussed here, that person will answer a few questions while everyone trudges along, but then they really need to get to class.

[ganesh]

When the character wonders Who They Are, they're always looking in the Mirror Of Contemplation. They they punch it and it shatters! Just like their Identity! Who Am I? Whoooo Ammmm IIIII??!!!!

[DeLurker]

Everyone keeps their prescription meds in the bathroom medicine chest in the bathroom medicine chest that their guests/dates will use and snoop through.

[ganesh]

People who look through my bathroom cabinet aren't going to find meds!

[Shannon L.]

If someone is really hungry and it's been a long time since they've had a decent, filling meal, then, when presented with a sandwich, they will snatch it out of the person's hand and start shoving it into their mouth, taking huge, choking bites.  If they are presented with a sit down meal, they will take heaps and heaps of everything and start shoveling it into their mouth (and if there is finger foods on the table, they will grab as much as they can in one hand and start chomping on it).

 

I've volunteered in homeless shelters and never saw that kind of behavior. 

[DittyDotDot]

People who look through my bathroom cabinet aren't going to find meds!

 

Me either. I'm always somewhat amazed at the amount of prescription meds in TV people's homes. But I thought that was probably just me.

[Kromm]

I know we've done our share of cop/detective show ones, but have we done the "cell phone ringing exactly when someone is trying to hide" one yet? (I guess that would just be the Detective shows mainly, since Cops usually don't have to hide, in most plots).

 

I guess this works for Spy Shows too. Or come to think on it, even comedies where someone is breaking into a parent or sibling's room, or a locked room at a school, or some rival's house, or whatever.  The important thing is I bet this only happens on TV!  Not that it isn't POSSIBLE in real life, just that people in real life tend to think out their misdeeds ahead of time more than they do on TV, so silencing your phone is probably not an afterthought.

[proserpina65]

Me either. I'm always somewhat amazed at the amount of prescription meds in TV people's homes. But I thought that was probably just me.

I have several different prescriptions, but I don't keep any of them in the bathroom cabinet.  You're not supposed to keep meds where there's a lot of humidity.  So anyone snooping through my 'medicine' cabinet will just find toothpaste, calamine lotion, band aids and dust.  Lots of dust.

[Rick Kitchen]

 

I know we've done our share of cop/detective show ones, but have we done the "cell phone ringing exactly when someone is trying to hide" one yet? (I guess that would just be the Detective shows mainly, since Cops usually don't have to hide, in most plots).

 

Before cell phones were so common, people tended to sneeze when they were trying to hide.

[andromeda331]

(I guess that would just be the Detective shows mainly, since Cops usually don't have to hide, in most plots).

It comes up on cop shows. The only time the cop will turn of their cellphone or leave it behind will be when someone is

calling with important information, or no one knows where they are when the killer returns or their fighting with the 

killer no one can come and rescue them.  Although many times somehow their partner will show up to rescue them

or immediately afterwards.

[merylinkid]

 

Not that it isn't POSSIBLE in real life, just that people in real life tend to think out their misdeeds ahead of time more than they do on TV, so silencing your phone is probably not an afterthought.

Clearly you've never been in court with all the signs that say "TUrn your cell phone off or it will be confiscated" and then have your cell phone go off.   

 

... or so I've heard of it happening...

[Ohwell]

Only on TV does a woman drink beer from a long neck bottle to show how cool and/or tough she is.   

[kiddo82]

Serious question: why dirty a glass? When I'm just hanging out with my friends, guys and girls alike, everyone just drinks from the bottle because it's easier, especially when outdoors. Other than at a restaurant or bar, I don't remember the last time I drank beer from a glass.

[Kel Varnsen]

Serious question: why dirty a glass? When I'm just hanging out with my friends, guys and girls alike, everyone just drinks from the bottle because it's easier, especially when outdoors. Other than at a restaurant or bar, I don't remember the last time I drank beer from a glass.

Super beer nerd here, but I don't remember the last time I didn't drink a beer from a glass, and most nights I will have a beer. Depending on the kind of beer you drink you will actually get more flavour if you drink from a glass because of how taste and smell work together.

[ganesh]

I'm drinking from a bottle right now, but sometimes I'll refill my growler and use a frosty pint glass.

[shapeshifter]

Super beer nerd here, but I don't remember the last time I didn't drink a beer from a glass, and most nights I will have a beer. Depending on the kind of beer you drink you will actually get more flavour if you drink from a glass because of how taste and smell work together.

Are you my daughter? Or maybe her soul mate? Or her doppleganger?

Before cell phones were so common, people tended to sneeze when they were trying to hide.

Or knock something over.

[DeLurker]

Only on TV does a woman drink beer from a long neck bottle to show how cool and/or tough she is.   

I always drank straight from a bottle unless drinking draft beer or having a black & tan.  Not long neck's since college days because I got klassy and moved on to imports.

[DittyDotDot]

I always drank straight from a bottle unless drinking draft beer or having a black & tan.  Not long neck's since college days because I got klassy and moved on to imports.

 

But, the question is, did you look cool and/or tough when drinking from the bottle? ;)

[DeLurker]

Tough?  No.  Hard to look tough when you weighed as much as a soaking wet kitten (I'm on my 9th life as now).

 

Cool?  Delusional and drunk DeLurker would say Hell yeah!  Actually, most of the time would be a yes but that was largely enviormental.  In days of yore, most of my drinking was done at small funky beachside bars and the other patrons were often toasted.  And I was one of those girls who look comfortable holding a pool cue thanks to having an older brother that taught me how to shoot a decent game.

[Kel Varnsen]

Are you my daughter? Or maybe her soul mate? Or her doppleganger?

Probably no to all questions as i am a married guy from Canada. Also trying to decide if i want to show more of my beer nerdyness and say something about @ganesh drinking out if a frosty glass (drinking a too cold beer mutes the flavours. By the way there is a beer thread over in everyone else area if there are other beer nerds.

[kiddo82]

Super beer nerd here, but I don't remember the last time I didn't drink a beer from a glass, and most nights I will have a beer. Depending on the kind of beer you drink you will actually get more flavour if you drink from a glass because of how taste and smell work together.

Thanks for the info. Makes sense. I still don't know if I see myself using a glass next time but at least now I know I can think I'm cool by drinking straight from the bottle. I honestly thought it was something that most everyone did.

[ChromaKelly]

I have several different prescriptions, but I don't keep any of them in the bathroom cabinet.  You're not supposed to keep meds where there's a lot of humidity.  So anyone snooping through my 'medicine' cabinet will just find toothpaste, calamine lotion, band aids and dust.  Lots of dust.

If you were the subject of an investigation, the calamine lotion would mean you currently have or just had poison ivy, meaning you must spend a lot of time outdoors, meaning you are the killer because the body was found in the woods!

*Because on TV, nobody keeps ibuprofen, antacid, or benadryl on hand for just in case. It always Means Something.

[BatmanBeatles]

When someone tries to cheer you up and says to stay positive, you must respond with "OK I'm positive something bad will happen."

[ganesh]

My whole point was that I have lube in the medicine cabinet. Snoop away!

[kili]

If you were the subject of an investigation, the calamine lotion would mean you currently have or just had poison ivy, meaning you must spend a lot of time outdoors, meaning you are the killer because the body was found in the woods!

 

I pity the CSI tech who may have to one day process my house. That rare grass seed you found that can only be found in one park in the city? Not related to the crime...I just didn't vacuum very well behind the bookcase. That unidentified finger print? That's from my friend who visited two months ago...I haven't had time to windex that decorative bowl lately.  That fibre you found wedged between the seat cushions....er....I guess I should vacuum there too.That could be from Christmas. That drop of blood you found with the luminol....okay, I totally cleaned that up...I guess I should have used bleach...it was from when I used a knife to open a box and the knife slipped.

 

Only on TV do the lab techs find seeds that are not only relevant to the crime, but only found in one or two places in the city.

[BatmanBeatles]

That applies to House as well. The exotic seeds behind the bookcase could mean your migraines turn out to be a parasite in your privates.

[Calvada]

Speaking of beverages, only on TV can you brew a cup of tea in 30 seconds or less.  I have to let the tea bag sit in the mug for 3 to 4 minutes, but on TV, you can swish the bag around a couple times and it's ready to drink. 

 

The other thing about beverages on TV that I notice is all these families who buy milk by the quart.  What's up with that?  In my family, we would go through at least a gallon a day.  It's why we had an extra fridge in the basement, to keep gallons of milk.  When my siblings and I were teens, especially after cross country practice or basketball practice, we could each drink about a quart ourselves. Of course, we grew up in Wisconsin . . .  

[CoderLady]

That applies to House as well. The exotic seeds behind the bookcase could mean your migraines turn out to be a parasite in your privates.

 

No, lupus. Oh, wait -- it's never lupus.

[mansonlamps]

Only on TV is Finn/Fin a perfectly common name. I've managed to live half a century without ever knowing one, but have seen a number on TV and an additional number of references to other Fin's I don't know on these boards from shows I don't watch.

[shapeshifter]

Only on TV is Finn/Fin a perfectly common name. I've managed to live half a century without ever knowing one, but have seen a number on TV and an additional number of references to other Fin's I don't know on these boards from shows I don't watch.

Just off the top of my head:

Walter White's son on Breaking Bad

Female CSI in the last seasons of CSI

One of Bones squinterns

Best use of the name: Son named Fin on Sharknado 3

But there's never a baby naming scene with Finn.

Are we to assume that some of them were named Phineas?

Edited October 10, 2015 by shapeshifter

[DittyDotDot]

Isn't Finn just short for Finley or Finnegan? Known one of those?

[ganesh]

I pity the CSI tech who may have to one day process my house. That rare grass seed you found that can only be found in one park in the city? Not related to the crime...I just didn't vacuum very well behind the bookcase. That unidentified finger print? That's from my friend who visited two months ago...I haven't had time to windex that decorative bowl lately.  That fibre you found wedged between the seat cushions....er....I guess I should vacuum there too.That could be from Christmas. That drop of blood you found with the luminol....okay, I totally cleaned that up...I guess I should have used bleach...it was from when I used a knife to open a box and the knife slipped.

 

But if your house was too clean. It would be "too clean."

 

I'm a single guy and I buy a quart of milk every week. I use it to make oatmeal for breakfast. When we were growing up, my mother bought a gallon every week though. 

[mansonlamps]

Isn't Finn just short for Finley or Finnegan? Known one of those?

Nope neither. I do know it's short for Odafin on L&O:SVU.

[BatmanBeatles]

Just off the top of my head:

Walter White's son on Breaking Bad

Female CSI in the last seasons of CSI

One of Bones squinterns

Best use of the name: Son named Fin on Sharknado 3

But there's never a baby naming scene with Finn.

Are we to assume that some of them were named Phineas?

Walter White's son called himself Flynn

[Popples]

Speaking of beverages, only on TV can you brew a cup of tea in 30 seconds or less.  I have to let the tea bag sit in the mug for 3 to 4 minutes, but on TV, you can swish the bag around a couple times and it's ready to drink. 

 

The other thing about beverages on TV that I notice is all these families who buy milk by the quart.  What's up with that?  In my family, we would go through at least a gallon a day.  It's why we had an extra fridge in the basement, to keep gallons of milk.  When my siblings and I were teens, especially after cross country practice or basketball practice, we could each drink about a quart ourselves. Of course, we grew up in Wisconsin . . .  

 

I do my tea in an insulated mug and I have to let it sit at least 20 minutes or I'll scald my mouth.

 

I'm not an avid Modern Family watcher, but I caught a repeat and Claire bought a half-gallon of milk for a family of 5. Unless everyone except one person in that house was lactose intolerant, that's not lasting 24 hours.

[ChromaKelly]

Guess what I just did? I went out and sat on the roof of my house. I moved recently and noticed that I could easily get out to the roof from my bedroom window. I got the idea from TV. I'm 42 and never sat on my roof before. I really should have brought a bottle of beer or some pot and I could have been a real TV person. I'd just need an ex-boyfriend or BFF to join me. Of course they would poke their head out the window and say "Thought I'd find you here."

Edited October 10, 2015 by ChromaKelly

[ganesh]

Or, mistakenly think you were going to jump, and called the cops on you.

[Rick Kitchen]

There's Finn Hudson from "Glee", and there's a new character coming to "Days of Our Lives" whose name is Finn, though it isn't clear if that's a first name or a last name.

[shapeshifter]

Walter White's son called himself Flynn

Whoops! I should've known that the show for which I have the most respect wouldn't use a name that has become oddly trendy Only On TV!

So. We have thus far:

Female CSI in the last seasons of CSI

One of Bones squinterns

Son named Fin on Sharknado 3

Finn Hudson from Glee

new character coming to "Days of Our Lives" whose name is Finn

At least 3 different one-episode characters on Castle

Finn on The 100 (2014-2015)

Any more?

ETA:

There was a lawer on The Good Wife last season and the vice president's son on the 2nd seadon of Homeland. I don't think i have ever met a finn either.

Also (how could I forget?!):

Don't forget Fin Tutuola played by Ice-T on Law & Order:SVU.

And (none of which I'm familiar with):

Finn on Adventure Time.

There's a list of real and fictional people named Finn at https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Finn_(given_name)

--includes:

Finn, a character in the Jackie Chan Adventures television series

Finn, one of the main protagonists of the animated television series Storm Hawks

Finn Nelson, a character in the television show My Mad Fat Diary

Finn O'Connor (Hollyoaks), a character played by Connor Wilkinson in the television show Hollyoaks

Finn Sharkey, a character in the television series Waterloo Road.

ETA: I've never met a real life Finn and I've worked at a college since 2001, so I see a lot of names.

Edited October 11, 2015 by shapeshifter

[BatmanBeatles]

Finn on Adventure Time.

[Rick Kitchen]

There's a list of real and fictional people named Finn at https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Finn_(given_name)

[Kel Varnsen]

Any more?

There was a lawer on The Good Wife last season and the vice president's son on the 2nd seadon of Homeland. I don't think i have ever met a finn either.

[Tunia]

Isn't Finn just short for Finley or Finnegan? Known one of those?

 

A friend's 3-year old is nicknamed Finn.  He's the fifth in his family with his real name, so rather than being So&So, the Fifth, they shortened it up,  (Just equate a $5 bill being called a finn.)  His real name is kinda' old-world sounding, and this is more modern.  It suits him.

[selkie]

Only on TV is Finn/Fin a perfectly common name. I've managed to live half a century without ever knowing one, but have seen a number on TV and an additional number of references to other Fin's I don't know on these boards from shows I don't watch.

 

 Finn has been somewhere in the 250-300th most common male baby names range in the Social Security baby names index the past five or so years after being not on the charts before that. (I've got a cousin who named her son Finn during that time frame)  I think in this case, like with Madison- which went from nowhere on the lists to everywhere shortly after the movie 'Splash' came out- it's the name showing up in pop culture and then expectant mothers picking up on it.

 

In contrast, the Bella, Edward,  and Jacob of 'Twilight' were already smack in the top ten charts before Stephnaie Meyer published her first book- I've heard people assert the popularity of those names came from 'Twilight' when Meyer was just using names that were already becoming on-trend.

[Haleth]

I always assumed Finns were named for the legendary Irish warrior, Finn MacCool.

[mansonlamps]

Whoops! I should've known that the show for which I have the most respect wouldn't use a name that has become oddly trendy Only On TV!

So. We have thus far:

Female CSI in the last seasons of CSI

One of Bones squinterns

Son named Fin on Sharknado 3

Finn Hudson from Glee

new character coming to "Days of Our Lives" whose name is Finn

At least 3 different one-episode characters on Castle

Finn on The 100 (2014-2015)

Any more?

ETA:

And (none of which I'm familiar with):--includes:

Finn, a character in the Jackie Chan Adventures television series

Finn, one of the main protagonists of the animated television series Storm Hawks

Finn Nelson, a character in the television show My Mad Fat Diary

Finn O'Connor (Hollyoaks), a character played by Connor Wilkinson in the television show Hollyoaks

Finn Sharkey, a character in the television series Waterloo Road.

ETA: I've never met a real life Finn and I've worked at a college since 2001, so I see a lot of names.

Don't forget Fin Tutuola played by Ice-T on Law & Order:SVU.

[Sandman87]

Inspired by being involuntarily subjected to part of an old episode of Hart to Hart earlier tonight: Only on TV can you wake up with fabulous hair after being in a coma for seven years.