Meet The Putmans - General Discussion

[answerphone]

Will this be another one of my new favorite shows, featuring another extended dysfunctional, colorful family. Maybe so! I just started watching what I recorded last night. 

I've noticed a number of crosses featured in their decor, and after only ten minutes, I've heard "we're blessed" and "what a blessing". I'm assuming already they're very religious, and that's one bond they have.

[answerphone]

I've watched ten more minutes and now I'm creeped out. They're all kissing like newlyweds while cooking dinner together?

The daughter's husband changed his last name to Putnam?

All aboard the crazy train!

[answerphone]

I've watched part of the first episode, and I think the family's dog will be the most normal of them all. ?

[jumper sage]

On 1/24/2017 at 2:58 PM, AZ Curls said:

I agree this family is creepy.  This is what confused me, why the heck did they bring all the kids grocery shopping, a couple of the adults could have stayed home to watch them

This bothers me in normal families.  Why do both parents with 4 kids need to go to the grocery store together?  One stay home and let the rest of us get down the aisles unhindered.

 

On 7/24/2017 at 7:28 PM, humbleopinion said:

How the families of those who marrying into this group can stand by and watch the lunacy is baffling.

Right?

[humbleopinion]

Wonder if any in law family members, work colleagues, in the know neighbors, to this cult family has a FB page revealing the behind the scenes dirt...let us know please.

Or have they all be threatened threatened to SM silence?

Surprised so many Putmans living in squalor don't have outbreaks of diarrhea and pink eye continuously....

[Fostersmom]

1 hour ago, answerphone said:

I've watched ten more minutes and now I'm creeped out. They're all kissing like newlyweds while cooking dinner together?

The daughter's husband changed his last name to Putnam?

All aboard the crazy train!

The last name thing maybe could have been normal from a normal family, but this family sure the hell isn't it. I know someone whose little sister married a guy and converted from Lutheran to Jewish. He took her last name, she gave up her religion, he could give up his last name. I love that with them. This guy giving up his because he wanted to have the same name as all of them, not loving that at all. A little too Flowers in the Attic for me. 

What's the back story on them? I never saw their special last winter and only became aware of them in the last week or so. 

[Mindthinkr]

I thought that it was interesting when they showed the eldest son (?) fixing the trio of sliders. Cut later to when one of the wives was clearing the table and those sliders were still there like a centerpiece on the table. 

[CarolMK]

I read up on this family a bit to find their backstory. The sons are 33, 30 and 28, daughter is 26. The two eldest sons married in 2006, just a few months apart and son # 3 a year later. Then the daughter in 2013. So all of them married quite young, 2 of the sons were still in their teens and I'm assuming the wives were as well. One of the wives discussed her mother had been on hospice so maybe she has no other family. I do think there is some religious undertone to this that we aren't being shown. The only groups that seem to marry very young and have a lot of kids right away are Independent Baptists , Pentecostal and Mormons. Since all of the adult kids have a lot of children, I'm guessing this is one factor. Also, the fact that all of them got married very young seems to indicate that none of them were financially able to be independent anyway, but were in fact strongly encouraged to live with the mom and dad. The oldest daughter in law states she moved into their house, even into sharing a room with Blair (who was about 13 at the time)- why did she do that? Maybe she didn't get along with her parents? There is definitely some weird dynamic going on, more than ordinary cases of co-dependency. I can't imagine a 34,000 square foot house, it might as well be a palace/castle. I guess previous generations all lived together- I'm thinking of Downton Abbey now- but it's a lot less common today. Can't imagine there isn't some sort of conflict going on at least sometimes. Everyone shares bank accounts and has to eat all the same meal for dinner all of the time? Even the Duggars don't appear to have the same meal for all of their kids anymore from what I've seen on their show. And the Duggars appear to encourage their kids to move out and set up their own households upon marrying, which might also explain the rapid succession of marriages in that family. 

[Mollysmom]

What struck me is how weird the father is. How completely controlling he is telling his daughter that HE will decide when she is healthy enough to move back with her husband after the baby. WTF? Her husband is a doctor, I think he can help her decide. This is the most dysfunctional family I've ever seen - worse than the Duggars even. 

ETA: And the 34,000 sq ft house? That's not a house, that's a mini-mall. There are shopping centers smaller than that. 

Edited September 12, 2017 by Mollysmom

[keetmommy]

I thought the dad kissing his grown daughter on the lips as she was about to go give birth was weird. And tell me what do the others do, I wouldn't be thrilled if I was a Dr and had to share my checks with the family..dont get it at all...But like a train wreck, I cant look away...

[Squirrely]

I wish they weren't so creepy. The concept of multiple generations living together is not the norm in the US as it is in other areas (many Asian countries come to mind) and I find it fascinating. I'm an introvert and I would go insane, but I also love the idea of having so much help!

Then they all cry and kiss and hug like Jamie and Blair are going off to war instead of an apartment a couple hours away for a few days, and they lose me. Plus Papa Putnam needs to get a grip. That was disgusting. And then you have the kids saying this wasn't planned, and cut to Papa saying he wanted them all to live with him. Maybe the kids didn't realize they were being gas lighted into it. I truly think that's what happened. 

[gonecrackers]

I noticed they all seem very 'on' for the cameras; no one can be that animated all the time. There isn't one introvert in the bunch? I am & I'd lose my mind in all that chaos.

The dad thinking he's the only one who can tell Blair when she's healthy enough to leave was disturbing, & probably opened a small window into what is going on there.

Edited September 14, 2017 by gonecrackers

[Purerockfury]

I've never been more creeped out by a TLC family before watching this. My god, these people are legit freaks. The father is an absolute controlling pos and everyone is just completely brainwashed. Those poor kids!!!

[Mollysmom]

10 hours ago, gonecrackers said:

I noticed they all seem very 'on' for the cameras; no one can be that animated all the time. There isn't one introvert in the bunch? I am & I'd lose my mind in all that chaos.

The dad thinking he's the only one who can tell Blair when she's healthy enough to leave was disturbing, & probably opened a small window into what is probably going on there.

I was thinking the same thing - that there doesn't seem to be ANY introverts in that family. How is that? My mother is extremely extroverted, but the rest of us are introverted. I wouldn't last more than about 15 minutes in that house before I would shut down and start pulling my hair out from the chaos. 

[humbleopinion]

The family dog would be dialing Social Services with his paw to alert the authorities to this train wrecked family.

The dad needs a mental evaluation as do all the adults....

[tabloidlover]

I feel so uncomfortable watching this family.   This family is a bridge too far for me. 

[Christi]

I hate these people

[Purerockfury]

I feel like the wives and children should lock their doors when they're sleeping and papa putman is home. He just seems like a sick, sick little man. The two older sons seem rather demented as well. 

Edited September 14, 2017 by Purerockfury

[Mindthinkr]

I just watched this show. Came here to discuss. Wow. All of you have such strong opinions. Mostly negative. Although it was an awkward family dynamic to me, I didn't want to choose sides until I had seen more. 

[silverspoons]

I finally watched this show tonight. Was interested what faith they might be or the back story. I didn't like how they presented the family. I would have like to meet each adult child and find out their job, their spouse, why they decided to live in the house and their kids names. All I know is one is a medical resident and the others work for the dad? 

Also the 6 bedrooms were not explained. There are 5 married couples , so do they each get a bedroom and 15 kids get a bedroom. 

A weird as it seems to some my first husband was a doctor and took my last name. The one thing was he had to change it before finishing his boards or it would have been hyphenated. I had several other friends that had husbands take their names. We all had different reasons, some of the women were professionals, some were only children, some had unusual dying out last names. It is more common the people know, but is certainly regional. In an odd twist I got remarried and husband number 2 took my last name. My first marriage like most of my friends was on the east coast and it was super easy for a man to take a women's name , just a line on the marriage certificate. Second marriage was Utah and it took years of legal paperwork and money to have a man change his last name. 

Im sure I'll still watch this show even though the dad seems odd, to try and get answers. I also don't get the 34,000 as ft home. The parents are empty nesters, and each family should have a 2500sq ft home, so maybe 12000 sq ft? Even that would be large. I live in polygamy Utah and have seen incredible homes(the wealthy polygamists not the ones on tv) and you don't need 34k sq ft for that many people. Does it have an indoor pool? A school? It is not the cost of building but the utilities and taxes I wouldn't like. 

[gonecrackers]

I was also concerned about the bedroom situation. Each couple would need their own room but then where are the kids sleeping? I can't imagine anyone having any real privacy - & that one couple was talking about their active sex life...

Not to mention there's just 2 bathrooms, & all those people needing to shower, kids needing to bathe, etc. I think in the first show a few months ago someone mentioned walking in on the sister while she was showering & I think it was one of the brothers? Wtf?

I think the idea behind the new mega home is that future generations will not to leave as well. Just wow.

ETA: I think Blair's husband changed his name just to be one of the bunch, so as not to be different from the rest of the family.

Edited September 14, 2017 by gonecrackers

[humbleopinion]

Guess Blair's family is okay with him changing his name or maybe he is an orphan....like his FIL.

The old house is a jail, the new house will be a prison to house more inmates that have life sentences with no hope for parole or escape.

Maybe the grandkids will mutiny and refuse to live their life under their grandfather's, uncles', aunts' rules.

The house they live in is 6K square feet with 2 bathrooms.

The family is made up of contractors, how hard would it be to add 3 more bathrooms....re purpose the bathroom fixtures in the new home if you are worried about money...

They want to be piled on top of each other to hook the TLC money and fame.

Hope the show exposes the father's mental illness and the adults start breaking away from the group mind think....where are the inlaws?

[humbleopinion]

Envision 26 cases of pink eye  that keeps on getting passed around...endlessly.

Same for diarrhea.......eww

[Amers]

Is it not a fire hazard to have that many people and that few bedrooms? God forbid a large fire break out, it seems pretty dangerous. That's my first thought. I need to see a bit more but I get an ick vibe from some of the men. I mean, Kody Brown was annoying but he didn't make me concerned about being a pervert. 

[Amers]

These people are so emotional. Lawd.

[Purerockfury]

I don't get how not one of the four kids didn't tell Mom and dad hell no and move away. I'm sensing some extreme control, manipulation and brainwashing. 

[humbleopinion]

When I was a pre-teen I didn't want my grandpa pawing at me for a hug 24/7.

Boundaries, grandad....

The adults will have a mass exodus of the grand kids because they will read the SM about their family and rebel....

 

The past Goggle matches of the patriarch has been scrubbed and can't find the negative comments of neighbors and towns people anymore.

[gonecrackers]

There was a scene where the patriarch & matriarch are speaking with Blair, & patriarch is on the couch next to her. He's mostly alone but for a shot one of the DIL's, the youngest DIL, I think, was oddly snuggled up next to him. I was taken aback by that. Do women snuggle with their FIL's? I never did; blech.

[humbleopinion]

So many skin crawling scenes that you can't believe you are seeing...wonder how her mother and father, siblings think about seeing her snuggle bunny up to her FIL...agree, yuck.....

There HAS to be  overly opinionated  in law cousin or someone who knows the family going on SM bad mouthing them...

[Scarlett45]

The multi-generational living doesn't phase me, most of the world lives similarly, and people in the USA often did until the promotion of the "nuclear family" during the most WW2 boom. However there is still autonomy between adults living in the household- only ONE bank account? Only two bathrooms?!! Why??! 

 

There's a difference between "dad is the patriach and head of the family" and "dad controls our every move". Interesting to say the least. 

Edited September 15, 2017 by Scarlett45

[ariel]

6 hours ago, Amers said:

Is it not a fire hazard to have that many people and that few bedrooms? God forbid a large fire break out, it seems pretty dangerous. That's my first thought. 

What state of the US do they live in?  It could be one of those states that doesn't like safety regulations "imposed" upon them.

[Mrs. Hanson]

15 hours ago, ariel said:

What state of the US do they live in?  It could be one of those states that doesn't like safety regulations "imposed" upon them.

They live in Pigeon MI - why I remember that....I am not sure.  Don't judge me - LOL!  Okay this family is straight up NUTS.  One checking account for that group?  So mu hubby and I make $90,000 combined and have one kid but we support you and your family of SEVEN where only the dad has a paycheck?  Pass......

Father Figure creeps me out.  Asking permission to move?  Really?  I picture some branch of the family running away in the middle of the night.  Run family run!  And now  huge ass home is being built so you better stay!!  We built this compound for YOU!!!   Creepy creepy creepy!!!!

Edited to add:  they all ended up "by accident" (yeah, right) as they kept having kids and could not afford a bigger home and went to live with Mom and Dad......well here is an idea:  Birth. Control.  Try it!!!

Edited September 15, 2017 by Mrs. Hanson

[jennylauren123]

So the dad thinks he should decide when the mom-to-be (for the third time at age 26) is healthy enough to return home? And many think it's the husband's decision? Um, what about the MOM? I mean, she's young, but she chose to be married and birth all these babies. She's a legit adult. I vote that she should decide, with her husband the almost-doctor's input. Papa? You stay out of it, ya old turd!

[Mrs. Hanson]

1 hour ago, jennylauren123 said:

Papa? You stay out of it, ya old turd!

I agree!!  When he was talking to the camera, saying (about the living situation) "it is great....AND IT WORKS!"  I wanted to say yeah, it works for you ya old coot.  Serving your own ego and your needs!

[CarolMK]

The one aspect that I see of this family dynamic is: even though the adult children are adults, when living home with their mom and dad, they are still falling into the dynamic most kids and teenagers have with their parents. Dad (and to a lesser extent, Mom) is making the major decisions about things like having the one bank account. These "adults" never probably had to figure out their own budget and survival because it's always been done for them. I also think that all of them , marrying so young, would not have been able to establish their own households and have so many kids if they weren't already living with their parents. Stay at home moms in their 20's with 4-5 children? Not unless the dad is making over $100,000 a year, at least. Also, Dad and Mom have never encouraged independence, so maybe the kids had no desire to try to find out what it was like. Even in foreign countries where muti-generations of families live together, I sincerely doubt that there are 26 people in one house. Plus everyone agreeing to all eat together, the same meal, at 6 pm- just seems unusual that all would agree to that. I still think that the young women who married into this family probably didn't have as close a relationship to their own parents as they did with the Putmans. The oldest wife moved in 2 years before her marriage to share the room with the youngest sister and another one mentioned her mother being on hospice, implying she'd passed away and she was grateful to have everyone around to help with the kids. 

We have 2 adult kids living at home with us and commuting to college, ages 20 and 23. It's sometimes a bit hard for me to step back and not tell them what to do, at least sometimes. They forget to do their laundry and take out their trash until it's overflowing, don't always clean up their dishes after making snacks, things like that. But in the Putman family, it's like all of the adult kids just go along with whatever their dad says. They don't seem to question him at all. 2 of the sons work for their dad also. I wonder what a clinical psychologist thinks of this family dynamic. 

[EastCoast4Life]

Quote

Don't think the TV audience is responding to an emotionally crippled family with a domineering  father holding his family physically and emotionally too close and too tight because of his insecurities.

Considering this is the description for Alaskan Bush People, the audience may tune in....

So there are 12 girl grandchildren, most of whom will all hit puberty around the same time. I would kill myself living there. Maybe that is why they need 34k square feet in the new manse? 

[Hero]

The younger son looks so sad all the time. I feel like he wants to move out and live his own life, but he is controlling, creepy dad has this hold on him that he can't shake off. 

[crgirl412]

I think much of it is nice.  I think that they are laying a lot of this family stuff very, very thick- they have another season to be renewed!!   

They are sort of like a cross between the Duggars (They are very family-centric and  some type of Christian) and Sister Wives (They are very modern in many ways and seem to just spend money with no sales or coupons like at the grocery store.)

That new house is way too big for a family who likes to life so closely together.  This is SO clear and they will be miserable which spells another season!! 

The girls got make-overs from when they saw themselves on tv in January.  I don't like them all so blonde. 

Also, I am getting a Catholic vibe from them but there is no crucifix and Mary statues.  Hmmmmm.......

Edited September 19, 2017 by crgirl412

[pinkelephant3]

If anyone wants to see how people who know the putmans really feel check out the comment section... https://tv-release-dates.com/meet-the-putmans-season-1-9143/

[camom]

So did Blair's husband perform her C section?  They sure made it sound that way, but that seems like a bad idea to me.  And Blair had C sections with her other boys, but the parents acted like she was being sent to death row.  

"Pitman rules supersede hospital rules."  Really, you jerk?  Daddy Bill makes me want to punch him.  I can enjoy a good train wreck show, but I'm not sure I can watch this without throwing things at my TV.

[jumper sage]

On 9/15/2017 at 1:50 PM, Mrs. Hanson said:

They live in Pigeon MI -

They live in the thumb, west side off the Saginaw Bay.  Local papers say they live in Caseville which is NW but still on the Saginaw Bay.  From the pics it does look more like Caseville which is right on the bay.  Caseville has an old fashion roller rink and mini golf.  We used to have a cottage by Sleeper State Park and go into Caseville all the time.

[crgirl412]

1 hour ago, pinkelephant3 said:

If anyone wants to see how people who know the putmans really feel check out the comment section... https://tv-release-dates.com/meet-the-putmans-season-1-9143/

WOW!!!  You know the saying, "Where there is smoke, there is fire."  We'll from the different but very similar comments from people who know or of them in MI, there is a lot of smoke.  I think that all is not as good as it seems.  I hope what they are saying isn't true but my gut is telling me that it is.       

[Caseysgirl]

The father saying that Putnam policy supersedes hospital policy made me want to jump through the TV and strangle him.  If I were a nurse in that hospital and the TLC cameras and 26 people were trying to come in to a sterile envirornment I would be freaking out. For god sakes, they're all going to be living with him in a few days, why is it so important to see him within minutes of his birth unless you are the other parent. And after 16 grandchildren, who the hell has to hang out in waiting room anymore. Give the parents some privacy and alone time.

[crgirl412]

17 minutes ago, Caseysgirl said:

The father saying that Putnam policy supersedes hospital policy made me want to jump through the TV and strangle him.  If I were a nurse in that hospital and the TLC cameras and 26 people were trying to come in to a sterile envirornment I would be freaking out. For god sakes, they're all going to be living with him in a few days, why is it so important to see him within minutes of his birth unless you are the other parent. And after 16 grandchildren, who the hell has to hang out in waiting room anymore. Give the parents some privacy and alone time.

I am an RN who worked on a neurosurgery unit so I saw people who had various surgeries of "seriousness" and  I swear the less serious the surgery, the more people.  It used to drive me nuts!!!  They were usually the biggest PIA for stupid stuff, too! 

Where they were in post-partum scenes isn't a sterile environment (The OR was) but in no way should all of those children with their germs shouldn't be visiting hours after his birth except his father and maybe his siblings.   Who knows though, Westerners have far more allergies now that we are so clean so maybe they are more right than wrong.  I was very disturbed that the brother and husband were so involved in the c-section!  I can't even imagine the fallout if things had gone wrong.

[keetmommy]

I want to like this family, but I just cant deal with them., although for snarking sake I will keep watching. Really that much of a discussion over the color of the shingles??? I think I would go nuts with no privacy, but it would be nice to always have help?? 

[thebigboot]

On 7/20/2017 at 0:33 PM, 88Keys said:

What website?  I've looked at four, including TLC and two gossip sites, and can't find anything.  Only MLive.comhad comments, and they weren't that revealing.

I've read what they're talking about. Many many many accounts of fraud and abuse.

[Mrs. Hanson]

5 hours ago, Caseysgirl said:

The father saying that Putnam policy supersedes hospital policy made me want to jump through the TV and strangle him.  If I were a nurse in that hospital and the TLC cameras and 26 people were trying to come in to a sterile envirornment I would be freaking out. For god sakes, they're all going to be living with him in a few days, why is it so important to see him within minutes of his birth unless you are the other parent. And after 16 grandchildren, who the hell has to hang out in waiting room anymore. Give the parents some privacy and alone time.

Bolding mine:  No, hospital policy supersedes your ginormous ego, jackass.  Security!!!  If I were that daughter I would (honest to God) tell the family I was delivering on a Thursday when I was really delivering on a Monday.  (If I was a c section btw) - keep the crowds out!!!  In full disclosure I did tell my then hubby's family there were no visitors right away even though that was not true.  I just had surgery and the baby won't change much in 24 hours, I promise!!!

4 hours ago, keetmommy said:

I want to like this family, but I just cant deal with them., although for snarking sake I will keep watching. Really that much of a discussion over the color of the shingles??? I think I would go nuts with no privacy, but it would be nice to always have help?? 

You are nicer than me  - I don't want to like them!

[peaceknit]

On 9/14/2017 at 10:37 AM, humbleopinion said:

Envision 26 cases of pink eye  that keeps on getting passed around...endlessly.

Same for diarrhea.......eww

Or cold sores....

[b2H]

1 hour ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

If I were that daughter I would (honest to God) tell the family I was delivering on a Thursday when I was really delivering on a Monday.  

Yeah, but the difficult part here is that none of them KNOW they can ask for privacy because they've never HAD privacy.  With nearly 30 people living in 6,000 square feet of space or whatever it is, one doesn't know to just say to the rest of them, 'get out!'.

Edited September 19, 2017 by b2H

[Mrs. Hanson]

43 minutes ago, b2H said:

Yeah, but the difficult part here is that none of the KNOW they can ask for privacy because they've never HAD privacy.  With nearly 30 people living in 6,000 square feet of space or whatever it is, one doesn't know to just say to the rest of them, 'get out!'.

Very true!!  Let's face it:  if she DID say get out, they would all cry or break down.