Commercials That Annoy, Irritate or Outright Enrage

[Cobalt Stargazer]

Whoever comes up with Pizza Hut's ads needs to stop dropping acid before they go to work.

[SoSueMe]

T Mobile with Nicki Minaj 

What fresh hell is that?

[OSM Mom]

1 hour ago, SoSueMe said:

T Mobile with Nicki Minaj 

What fresh hell is that?

Is that who that is?  I had no idea who she was or what she was doing in the commercial. 

[Albino]

On 9/24/2016 at 3:54 PM, Ohwell said:

I think Chrissy looks like a chipmunk.

I think she has a bit more personality than a lot of 'spokesmodels' but yeah...those cheekbones are bad.  I've seen pics of her where she looks quite pretty...apparently the makeup artist wrestled the cheekbones into submission.  But what do I know?  Millions of people (men) think she's hot.

She's also famous for being married to John Legend who is apparently a music superstar of some kind.

[LoneHaranguer]

15 hours ago, OSM Mom said:

Is that who that is?  I had no idea who she was or what she was doing in the commercial.

She would have been more recognizable if the camera were behind her. I don't know why she's in the ad either.

[topanga]

5 minutes ago, LoneHaranguer said:

She would have been more recognizable if the camera were behind her. I don't know why she's in the ad either.

Apparently the guy was streaming her music all day then had to stop because he was using too much data. 

You didn't recognize Nikki Minhaj's speaking voice? I'm not a fan of hers, but I'd recognize that whiny, nasally tone anywhere. 

[Brattinella]

Just now, topanga said:

Apparently the guy was streaming her music all day then had to stop because he was using too much data. 

You didn't recognize Nikki Minhaj's speaking voice? I'm not a fan of hers, but I'd recognize that whiny, nasally tone anywhere. 

Well, her butt is a lot more recognizable, I think.

[Neurochick]

16 hours ago, OSM Mom said:

Is that who that is?  I had no idea who she was or what she was doing in the commercial. 

I realized a long time ago that if I don't know who a celebrity is, it's probably because the commercial isn't aimed at folks my age.  I'm middle aged and I realize that most shows and commercials are for folks in the generation before mine.  I don't like the commercial because I don't like T-Mobile but that's another story.

[iMonrey]

Not necessarily Neurochick - I have the same problem with sports celebrities. Don't follow sports, don't know the celebs. I realize I'm supposed to know who they are, but I don't 99.9% of the time.

There's a car commercial (I *think* it's Subaru) where young drivers/teens are calling their  parents to tell them they were just in an accident, and of course, the only thing the parent cares about is that their precious angel walked away without a scratch thanks to the safety of the Subaru. Sweet, sure, and of course your first priority. But . . . let's get real. Question number 2 is who caused the accident, what kind of damage did the car suffer, will insurance cover it, and was their damn kid texting while driving?

[topanga]

1 minute ago, iMonrey said:

Not necessarily Neurochick - I have the same problem with sports celebrities. Don't follow sports, don't know the celebs. I realize I'm supposed to know who they are, but I don't 99.9% of the time.

There's a car commercial (I *think* it's Subaru) where young drivers/teens are calling their  parents to tell them they were just in an accident, and of course, the only thing the parent cares about is that their precious angel walked away without a scratch thanks to the safety of the Subaru. Sweet, sure, and of course your first priority. But . . . let's get real. Question number 2 is who caused the accident, what kind of damage did the car suffer, will insurance cover it, and was their damn kid texting while driving?

But that's just it, iMorney. No, you don't know sports celebrities. And maybe you're think they're overpaid, entitled dweebs (I know I'm putting words in your mouth). But you do recognize that some athletes are famous, and some people know who they are. You don't assume that they're not important just because you don't know who they are (and probably don't care). 

Dollars to doughnuts, the car commercial was written by a man. I heard that when women wake up in a hospital and find out they've been involved in a car accident, they first ask about other passengers in the car, if anyone else was hurt, damage to the car, etc. And then they ask about themselves. When men wake up after a car accident, they want to know if they're okay. And they check to see if their dicks are okay. I kid you not.*

 

*Full disclosure: I heard this story in the movie, "Before Midnight," so I have no idea if it's true or not. But it sounds plausible. 

[Brattinella]

36 minutes ago, topanga said:

And they check to see if their dicks are okay. I kid you not.*

ROFL!

[LoneHaranguer]

3 hours ago, topanga said:

Apparently the guy was streaming her music all day then had to stop because he was using too much data.

But, they could equally have had the Village People pop up with the disco ball they got from Letgo and say the same thing, so why her?

[peacheslatour]

3 hours ago, Brattinella said:

Well, her butt is a lot more recognizable, I think.

Is that real? I've heard of people getting butt implants, is that what they're going tor?

[Brattinella]

I' m sure she has implants all over the place.  I just don't get the fascination with huge heart-shaped butts that hang over the chair.  I saw one picture of someone (KK, I think) where she was sitting on a ledge, her bottom was spread out sideways.  Eww.

[Cobalt Stargazer]

From the head-scratcher thread

3 hours ago, proserpina65 said:

On a topic-related note: I don't want a Domino's sign or a day with the Noid, thank you very much.

You know what else we don't need?

https://www.ispot.tv/ad/ACj1/burger-king-exchange
 

That. The cheetah is cool, but The King makes it creepy.

[Maverick]

3 hours ago, topanga said:

You didn't recognize Nikki Minhaj's speaking voice? I'm not a fan of hers, but I'd recognize that whiny, nasally tone anywhere. 

 If the point of your commercial is to tout unlimited data, you should really get someone who can enunciate the word 'unlimited'.    When she storms off with the Snapchat girl (you know, the one she just call 'this thing' 10 seconds earlier)  it sounds like she saying 'let's find a man with limited data'.

[OSM Mom]

7 hours ago, topanga said:

 

You didn't recognize Nikki Minhaj's speaking voice? I'm not a fan of hers, but I'd recognize that whiny, nasally tone anywhere. 

I mute every commercial every time, so I didn't hear her voice.  And from your description, I'm grateful.  

[SpikeGal]

On ‎9‎/‎23‎/‎2016 at 2:46 PM, peacheslatour said:

Cos-stanza!

Ya took the word right out of my mouth! LOL!

[Amethyst]

This may sound childish, but the tone in that Pizza Hut commercial is depressing.  That might be an actual grilled cheese in the crust, but I feel worse for the alien.

[backformore]

7 hours ago, Brattinella said:

I' m sure she has implants all over the place.  I just don't get the fascination with huge heart-shaped butts that hang over the chair.  I saw one picture of someone (KK, I think) where she was sitting on a ledge, her bottom was spread out sideways.  Eww.

Yeah, well, I had a big butt before it was fashionable!  Seriously, what is considered sexy or hot today, like a huge rear end, used to be called "fat".   And don't get me started on how women are supposed to "enhance"  their appearance with implants in their boobs and butt, wax every hair off their bodies, glue fake eyelashes on their eyelids, and weave fake hair onto their existing hair. 

[callmebetty]

7 hours ago, backformore said:

Yeah, well, I had a big butt before it was fashionable!  Seriously, what is considered sexy or hot today, like a huge rear end, used to be called "fat".   And don't get me started on how women are supposed to "enhance"  their appearance with implants in their boobs and butt, wax every hair off their bodies, glue fake eyelashes on their eyelids, and weave fake hair onto their existing hair. 

Don't forget about your bleached asshole courtesy of Shiny Hiney. 

15 hours ago, Maverick said:

 If the point of your commercial is to tout unlimited data, you should really get someone who can enunciate the word 'unlimited'.    When she storms off with the Snapchat girl (you know, the one she just call 'this thing' 10 seconds earlier)  it sounds like she saying 'let's find a man with limited data'.

I'm glad I'm not the only one who heard her say Limited data. 

[erikdepressant]

3 hours ago, callmebetty said:

Don't forget about your bleached asshole courtesy of Shiny Hiney. 

Now that Fall is here, I bet Shiney Hiney offers pumpkin-spice bung cream, because everything is pumpkin-spice flavored this time of year.

[iMonrey]

Quote

But that's just it, iMorney. No, you don't know sports celebrities. And maybe you're think they're overpaid, entitled dweebs (I know I'm putting words in your mouth). But you do recognize that some athletes are famous, and some people know who they are. You don't assume that they're not important just because you don't know who they are (and probably don't care). 

No, I just figure the commercial isn't marketed at me, it's marketed at sports fans. Although even that's not always the case. The one in particular I was thinking of was for American Family Insurance, and some guy is mentoring (?) a bunch of kids (?) in a park (?) somewhere and some "sports celebrities" come walking up and the man and the kids are all excited to see them.

Me? I have no idea who they are and I have no idea what sport they play. One of them looks vaguely familiar but I couldn't tell you his name if my life depended on it. And even if I did I still don't know what the hell the connection is to insurance. 

[Brattinella]

1 hour ago, erikdepressant said:

Now that Fall is here, I bet Shiney Hiney offers pumpkin-spice bung cream, because everything is pumpkin-spice flavored this time of year.

You just slay me, you know that? :D

[Maverick]

6 hours ago, erikdepressant said:

Now that Fall is here, I bet Shiney Hiney offers pumpkin-spice bung cream, because everything is pumpkin-spice flavored this time of year.

 They tried an apple pie flavor, but most people complained about the chunks in their rump.

[erikdepressant]

34 minutes ago, Maverick said:

 They tried an apple pie flavor, but most people complained about the chunks in their rump.

People in the Northeastern US were clenching a slice of sharp cheese on it.  The brief "cheddar commando" craze was brought to you by Sargento.

[Maverick]

2 minutes ago, erikdepressant said:

People in the Northeastern US were clenching a slice of sharp cheese on it.  The brief "cheddar commando" craze was brought to you by Sargento.

Real cheese pants brought to you by real cheese people?

[Cobalt Stargazer]

10 hours ago, erikdepressant said:

Now that Fall is here, I bet Shiney Hiney offers pumpkin-spice bung cream, because everything is pumpkin-spice flavored this time of year.

Well, you're the one who predicted it.
 

On 3/12/2015 at 1:32 PM, erikdepressant said:

*Good thing I caught my typo before posting "better-tasting bum products."

XD

[LuciaMia]

Quote

It was mildly amusing the first hundred times I saw it

Thats the problem with so many…charming the first few times till they run it into the ground. The same commercial can run 3 or 4 times in just one hour show.   Like the Huggies commercial with the lady singing "We all need a hug in the morning…"  Its sweet the first couple of times, then its damn annoying.

[Jaded]

I am so tired of that damn Bare Minerals commercial with the cake face plant I posted about awhile back. I used to only see it during one or two shows I watch. Now it's everywhere on every channel. 

[mmecorday]

Quote

Now that Fall is here, I bet Shiney Hiney offers pumpkin-spice bung cream, because everything is pumpkin-spice flavored this time of year.

I saw pumpkin spice flavored frosted mini wheats at Kroger last night. In the immortal words of Susan Powter, "Stop the insanity!"

Edited September 28, 2016 by mmecorday
spelling

[OSM Mom]

Saw a commercial for Auto Trader and it features children being little assholes.  Two in particular.  One riding in the back seat and kicking the hell out of the back of the drivers seat.  Dad just drives and smiles and thinks he needs a car with more legroom.  No.  You need to pull over, turn around and bitch slap that brat into next week.  Try that in my car you little brat.  You would only do it once.  

And brat #2. Dad is changing a flat tire and brat 2 is kicking a soccer ball on the side of the road and banks it off the car right next to dad's head.   Dad looks at brat, who smiles like "Oopsy" and dad just smiles and shakes his head.  Um.. No.  You slam a soccer ball off the side of my car, and that would be the last time you would see that ball.  Thanks for the dent and the paint scratches.  Oh.  And get your entitled little ass over there and help your dad change a tire and maybe learn something. The only thing I hate worse than a brat is a female who knows nothing about cars.  So go DIAF, Auto Trader.  

Edited September 28, 2016 by OSM Mom
Because I do know how to spell.

[Brattinella]

51 minutes ago, mmecorday said:

I saw pumpkin spice flavored frosted mini wheats at Kroger last night. In the immortal words of Susan Powter, "Stop the insanity!"

Truly.  I only like pumpkin spice flavor in my PUMPKIN PIE.  Got it, advertisers?

[St. Claire]

2 hours ago, Brattinella said:

Truly.  I only like pumpkin spice flavor in my PUMPKIN PIE.  Got it, advertisers?

"Pumpkin spice" is lovely in various fruit-based baked goods (I mean, it's just cinnamon with some ginger, nutmeg, and cloves- it's pretty much spice cake seasoning for people who don't want to measure from 4 separate jars) but it's just gotten out of control.

[janie jones]

This thread is itself an effective commercial for pumpkin spice Mini-Wheats, because I'd never heard of them, and now I want them. 

[3pwood]

The Panera commercial with the wistful girlish voice bemoaning description of a sandwich as "or something" has become almost intolerable.  And what's so great about avocados that are "hand sliced" rather than sliced in some other manner (whatever that might be)? 

[chessiegal]

4 minutes ago, 3pwood said:

The Panera commercial with the wistful girlish voice bemoaning description of a sandwich as "or something" has become almost intolerable.  And what's so great about avocados that are "hand sliced" rather than sliced in some other manner (whatever that might be)? 

I agree the Panera commercials are annoying, but I ignore them because I LUV their food - their salads, soups, sandwiches. Their loyalty program gives me discounts and freebies. Next month is my birthday which means I get a free sweet, so my husband will get a double chocolate brownie that I'll take a bite of, and is SO good. So glad their turkey chili is back on the menu since it's fall, so good. /running to avoid hurling tomatoes from the Panera dislikers.

[NinjaPenguins]

Quote

And what's so great about avocados that are "hand sliced" rather than sliced in some other manner (whatever that might be)? 

Panera can't hold a candle to my foot-sliced avocados, each lovingly toe-sculpted into a beloved cartoon character of your choosing. Or something.

Devour commercials creep me right the hell out. I mean, if you want to talk dirty to your mac and cheese and spank your meal, fine. Who am I to judge? Just do that shit in private and not on my TV screen.

I see Papa John has acquired a bespectacled pizza flunky to chirp about his latest crap on a crust deal. She somehow makes the commercial worse, although Peyton Manning crafting a cupcake with Papa's douche face on it certainly contributed the majority of the awfulness. 

[erikdepressant]

36 minutes ago, NinjaPenguins said:

Panera can't hold a candle to my foot-sliced avocados, each lovingly toe-sculpted into a beloved cartoon character of your choosing. Or something.

You could trademark your creations as AvocaToes or Holey-Sockamolies  (I get 10% of the profits now).

I don't know if it's nationwide or not, but Panera is offering delivery in our area.  I was trying to find that commercial to post.  It's as stupid as their other ones; I think it involves not getting too excited about clean food showing up at your door or something.  When I went to Panera's YouTube channel to look for the delivery commercial, their video that auto-played began with, "Clean food.  Words you don't often hear."  Really?  I hear those words every 20 minutes, thanks to Panera saturation.

I've posted before that I like their food, but I just don't want to go near them anymore.

[theatremouse]

Oh man, I'm so conflicted because...pretentious ad, but also...delivery. They could've had an ad that was literally a voiceover on top of a shot of any dish they serve or their logo etc, saying nothing more than "we deliver now" and they'd have me. I know the ad men get the big bucks for finding some hook but sometimes I'm like your message plain is enough to get my attention.

[DeLurker]

10 hours ago, NinjaPenguins said:

Panera can't hold a candle to my foot-sliced avocados, each lovingly toe-sculpted into a beloved cartoon character of your choosing.

 

9 hours ago, erikdepressant said:

You could trademark your creations as AvocaToes or Holey-Sockamolies 

Will both of you marry me?

[callmebetty]

F*** Off Time Warner couple, who barge into people's homes who just moved in and force them to watch sports and shows, when they are clearly still moving in.  The dude is bad, but that bitch who grabs the woman and says "Let's go watch my favorite show"  First of all NO! I'm doing something and if I am going to watch something it's going to be MY favorite show.

Then the asshole takes over the girls birthday party.  How have any of these ads been greenlighted, was there a focus group and THIS is what made people laugh?

[erikdepressant]

4 hours ago, theatremouse said:

Oh man, I'm so conflicted because...pretentious ad, but also...delivery. They could've had an ad that was literally a voiceover on top of a shot of any dish they serve or their logo etc, saying nothing more than "we deliver now" and they'd have me. I know the ad men get the big bucks for finding some hook but sometimes I'm like your message plain is enough to get my attention.

100 likes for that.  Their food could stand on its own, without needing my emotional attachment to the brand.  And if I could afford to eat there more often, I would.  Maybe they're just trying to get new customers.  They're going to lose me as a customer.

[Silver Raven]

On ‎9‎/‎28‎/‎2016 at 9:33 AM, mmecorday said:

I saw pumpkin spice flavored frosted mini wheats at Kroger last night. In the immortal words of Susan Powter, "Stop the insanity!"

Never step foot into a Trader Joe's this time of year.  They pride themselves on the number of items they sell that are pumpkin spice flavored.

I just saw an ad where a woman was all wrapped in seaweed, and she says, "I have no idea what's in this seaweed wrap".  Then she pulls her arms free and reaches for her Nature's Made vitamins and says, "But I do know what's in these vitamins."  Er, uh, but you don't EAT the seaweed wrap, idiot.

[callmebetty]

18 minutes ago, Silver Raven said:

Never step foot into a Trader Joe's this time of year.  They pride themselves on the number of items they sell that are pumpkin spice flavored.

I just saw an ad where a woman was all wrapped in seaweed, and she says, "I have no idea what's in this seaweed wrap".  Then she pulls her arms free and reaches for her Nature's Made vitamins and says, "But I do know what's in these vitamins."  Er, uh, but you don't EAT the seaweed wrap, idiot.

Ha! I just got back from there. I saw at least 15 pumpkin products. Though I was very tempted by the pumpkin bread pudding. 

[Brattinella]

6 minutes ago, callmebetty said:

Ha! I just got back from there. I saw at least 15 pumpkin products. Though I was very tempted by the pumpkin bread pudding. 

That actually sounds pretty good!

[random chance]

On 9/26/2016 at 6:17 PM, Maverick said:

 If the point of your commercial is to tout unlimited data, you should really get someone who can enunciate the word 'unlimited'.    When she storms off with the Snapchat girl (you know, the one she just call 'this thing' 10 seconds earlier)  it sounds like she saying 'let's find a man with limited data'.

That is exactly what I thought she said! It's a very confusing commercial.

[Prevailing Wind]

Oh, now I'm confused. I thought "Pumpkin Spice" was pumpkin flavored AND the mix of spices normally in a pumpkin pie.  Or is it JUST the conglomeration of spices?

Edited September 30, 2016 by Prevailing Wind

[erikdepressant]

New or not, the iPhone is just a phone.

Now, try to find five and a half minutes to watch Don Hertzfeldt's Billy's Balloon with the sound on:

Edited September 30, 2016 by erikdepressant

[riley702]

On 9/28/2016 at 0:33 PM, mmecorday said:

I saw pumpkin spice flavored frosted mini wheats at Kroger last night. In the immortal words of Susan Powter, "Stop the insanity!"

 

On 9/28/2016 at 9:40 PM, janie jones said:

This thread is itself an effective commercial for pumpkin spice Mini-Wheats, because I'd never heard of them, and now I want them. 

Me, too! Yum!

3 hours ago, Prevailing Wind said:

Oh, now I'm confused. I thought "Pumpkin Spice" was pumpkin flavored AND the mix of spices normally in a pumpkin pie.  Or is it JUST the conglomeration of spices?

Pumpkin spice is just the spices usually used with pumpkin.