Small Talk: The Polygamous Cul-de-Sac

[iwantcookies]

23 hours ago, Meowwww said:

Ugh.  The whole “did I already have it” “do I have it” is making my mental health not so good. 
Rants ahead. 
You all know I’m an essential worker.  I work at a small family owned pet food store.  Staffing is a struggle at best.  
Background:  I am 50   

Hubby and I were in London in October 2019.  I have a history of getting horribly sick every time I travel.  This time, both hubby and I got sick. Lots my sense of taste and smell.  Horrible lungs, fever, etc.  went to a doctor in London and got antibiotics and they didn’t help.  After we got home, he was fine but my lungs were so bad I ended up in the ER.  No meds helped, I got better after over a month. News is out that it was in Italy in September  

FF to this November, I was really feeling ill and my boss sent me home for the 2 weeks.  It was awful for mental health.  Negative test. Was it COVID? Insurance won’t pay for an antibody test.   My doctor is amazing, and even he says the antibody tests aren’t so accurate  

I’m one who gets a bad cold at least twice a year. To the point I lose taste and smell, horrible cough.  Except this year...I am so sold on wearing a mask it isn’t even funny. I will always wear one while traveling from now on. 

Anyway.  Today I have body aches and a sore throat.  It’s probably the new winter storm here in Wisconsin   

This game of do I have it, did I have it is killing me.  I’m so over the worry.  
When I get sick, I get really sick.  So I’m stressing about if this is COVID, if it is, how bad will it get?   Did I already have it?  I have asthma and weak lungs.  When I was a kid, I had pneumonia every winter until I was 16 or so.  
 

My hubby is very cavalier.  He went to thanksgiving and Christmas at his 75 year old parents’. My in laws are wonderful but they aren’t concerned either.  They are almost desperate to have my hubby, his sister and brother and our families over.  I stayed home. I’m just worried because when I get sick, I get SO sick and I’m selfish to worry about myself lol. 
 

My younger stepson, 20, flew in from Mississippi a few weeks ago.  He’s been splitting his time between our house and his mom’s, and there are a ton of kids at her house. He’s feeling fine.  I’m thankful for my older stepson who also has refused to do family gatherings this year.  
 

I’m just so stressed about this whole thing.  I’ve been coasting along, feeling ok about it, but it’s all been building up. 
 

Long story short. I can’t change my situation. I don’t need advice.  I just want to know how you all are dealing with it.  How your families are or are not worried. 
 

Hugs to you all and thanks for listening. 
 

I am pretty sure I had COVID 11/2019-3/2020. I was sick on/off the entire time. I drank cough syrup like water. Whatever meds I took it did not make me better.
 

I took anti body test twice and I have antibodies. This thanksgiving I was sick again, lost my sense of smell/taste. Got 2 COVID tests both negative. 
 

I got asthma and COVID made my asthma 100x worse. I can’t breath properly to this day. 
 

My mental health is in the toilet. Isolated and alone is wearing me down. I pop Prozac like tic tacs. 
 

Sorry for the rant but internet is all I got. 
 

 

Edited December 31, 2020 by iwantcookies

[Yeah No]

My heart just breaks to hear what everyone is going through, and then I realize that much of what you're all experiencing I am too.  It's a real effort some days.  And yes, it could always be worse, but when I say that my therapist tells me not to diminish what I'm going through because it is really bad and I'm handling it better than I think I am.  I try to believe him.  And despite your own troubles, you all have been a real source of support and inspiration to me and each other.  I just wanted to bring that to light because you are some pretty special people and I don't want you to forget how much of a difference you have made even as you yourselves feel pretty down about things.  You all have my gratitude, from the bottom of my heart.   It's good to see Mahamid and Meowww back again too!

P.S.  I accepted an offer on my Dad's apartment yesterday.  The cash offer turned out to be too low.  She was the mother of someone who lives in the building and didn't have a realtor to tell her it was too low.  When my realtor told her that we already had a higher offer, she backed off because she knew she couldn't meet it.  Then my realtor went back to the first people and told them that we'd had another offer and suggested that they offer more, which they did.  We ended up settling at $3,000 under asking price, which I'm fine with since that was the price my realtor had originally suggested.  So now I am waiting for the lawyer to finalize the contract, which will then go to the buyers for their signatures.  My realtor tells me that they are model buyers and that the board is going to love them.  Both are professionals, have great financials and credit, are prequalified for a loan, etc.  They had been looking for several months and made no offers until now, which says something.  They were incidentally the very first people to look at the apartment when it went on the market a few weeks ago.  I think they came back because they realized they really want this apartment.  I feel very excited for them and happy that it's going to people who will really appreciate it.  I know my mother would have wanted it that way so it really feels good.  It makes me remember how I felt on that day in 1974 when my mom and I found the apartment.  The building was still under construction.  We were in love from the moment we saw it.

Of course I am not breaking out the champagne just yet because I know that anything can still happen.  I am saying my prayers that everything goes smoothly and quickly.  I told both my realtor and lawyer that the only thing I care about right now is that the closing happens as quickly as possible, which I'm hoping is as close to within 2 months as possible but hopefully less than 3.  I am aware the Covid is always a reason things get delayed these days - I just hope not too much in this case.  Let's just hope that this is a sign of better days ahead - This and the vaccine for me are the life rafts in this treacherous sea I'm adrift in.  Maybe there's hope for all of us yet in 2021.  

[HighlandWarriorGrl]

45 minutes ago, iwantcookies said:

I am pretty sure I had COVID 11/2019-3/2020. I was sick on/off the entire time. I drank cough syrup like water. Whatever meds I took it did not make me better.
 

I took anti body test twice and I have antibodies. This thanksgiving I was sick again, lost my sense of smell/taste. Got 2 COVID tests both negative. 
 

I got asthma and COVID made my asthma 100x worse. I can’t breath properly to this day. 
 

My mental health is in the toilet. Isolated and alone is wearing me down. I pop Prozac like tic tacs. 
 

Sorry for the rant but internet is all I got. 
 

 

 

[iwantcookies]

@Teafortwo I live in a building and 95% of people don’t wear masks inside. Even the repair man/super didn’t wear one when they came. I was standing by open windows freaking out. 
 

Why can’t people wear a mask on a bus/train? I am so tired of being scared to get COVID again. I do not think I can survive it with my busted lungs. 
 

 

[Meowwww]

1 hour ago, iwantcookies said:

I am pretty sure I had COVID 11/2019-3/2020. I was sick on/off the entire time. I drank cough syrup like water. Whatever meds I took it did not make me better.
 

I took anti body test twice and I have antibodies. This thanksgiving I was sick again, lost my sense of smell/taste. Got 2 COVID tests both negative. 
 

I got asthma and COVID made my asthma 100x worse. I can’t breath properly to this day. 
 

My mental health is in the toilet. Isolated and alone is wearing me down. I pop Prozac like tic tacs. 
 

Sorry for the rant but internet is all I got. 
 

 

Hugs and love to you.  

[Yeah No]

4 hours ago, Teafortwo said:

Glad to see you back on the board, @Meowwww. I was thinking of you but I couldn'It remember your screenname. Knowing you work in a pet store, I was hoping you'd managed to stay well. 

I've been almost completely isolated. I speak with neighbors I run into in the street, backing away from them when they get too close for comfort. I participate in a a couple of weekly zoom gab sessions with friends. I speak often with a friend on the West Coast who is equally strict about avoiding others during this time. 

My favorite cousin had covid in late April through most of May. His primary symptom was delirium; he also developed pneumonia. He has been hospitalized twice, the first time for covid, the second, 4 months later, for a serious blood infection called camphylobacter. He is lucky in the sense that his main ongoing symptoms are psychological (anxiety and depression) but not otherwise physical. He can exercise; he can breathe. He also retired in August, which he'd been wanting to do for a couple years. Unfortunately his wife is not on the same page regarding caution. She had the option to teach her high school students from home, which he urged her to do, but she's chosen to go in to work every day. So he worries she and his kids will get infected, or that he'll get reinfected. 

My problems are that a couple of neighbors in my building don't follow the rules to wear masks in the hallways, basement laundry room, etc. I've been going to a local laundromat on warmer days, as there are generally few people and better air circulation there, and it is much cleaner. However, with hearing about this new, more contagious strain of the virus, I've stopped. The other day I washed my duvet cover in the bathtub. No mean feat. I live in NYC in a small apartment building, as many of you will remember.

I'm basically anxious all the time, except for when I check out and watch cat videos. Leaving and entering my building makes me anxious, since I don't know what could be floating around in the hallways (no ventilation). I'm anxious on the street, where I am continuously on the alert for people approaching without masks. I do wear a face shield over my mask. I restrict my grocery shopping to a couple of local stores, one of which limits the number of people inside. The other is small and has a plate glass window. If I see someone inside with a lowered mask, or if there are more than four shoppers inside I don't go in. I did not eat any take out food or deli sandwiches until the beginning of September. Now I purchase both about once a week. 

We've had mice and construction workers in our building throughout this whole pandemic. The construction crew is limited to one or two people due to covid, which means that the work (an apartment renovation right above me) has been protracted. They hope to finish this spring.

The worst is an inconsiderate neighbor who refuses to enter and exit his apartment quietly, which means I am often startled by the slamming door, which rattles me every time and is worse than the construction noise because it happens at all hours. 

I was severely anxious and depressed during the summer and took anxiety medicine. I was pretty much immobilized during that time and barely eating. I finally weaned myself off of the medication and began walking and eating again in late August. I discovered in late October that I'd lost 15 pounds. I could have used losing 5 but 15 was too much. I've gained some back though.

I do agree that it could be worse -- as another poster mentioned, London during WW II. I think I would have fared better if not for the situation with the neighbor. It is very unfortunate because the other neighbors are very nice. This is a kid whose father bought him the place, and he's a drug user. The co-op board admitted they made a mistake approving their purchase.  Among other things this kid travelled within the US over the summer, and did not follow NYC quarantine rules in place at the time (which increased my anxiety to a nearly paralyzing level about leaving my apartment during that time). "Hell is other people" as Sartre said.

Tea, I feel for you and share a lot of what you're going through right now.  I am mostly isolated myself except for my husband.  I zoom with one friend once a week or so, but I haven't seen her in months - other than running into her at the supermarket over the summer.  I haven't seen my 2 best friends in close to a year.  We talk but not often enough.  The new strain has me worried too.  Covid is already very contagious and now this is even more contagious?  Ouch.  So I'm almost completely locked down.  I am eating less and less and my clothes are fitting tighter and tighter.  It's unbelievable.  Not that I need to wear much but leggings these days anyway.  But that's so depressing.  I usually am one of those people who takes great care in how I dress and make myself up, and now I'm reduced to sweat pants and hoodies.  I have literally had to set an alarm on my cell phone to remind me to brush my teeth.  Just unbelievable.

I hear so many sad and horrible Covid stories - I was on the Covid-19 thread and someone I know from the board for years told their tale of "long hauler syndrome" that was just horrific.  I am on overload with feeling sad and worried about everyone else including my own life.  I am anxious all the time too, plus I have "Covid brain" which makes me completely ADD.  Like others, I can't start one project and finish it.  I am all over the map.  Every day I say I'm going to do xxx and yyy and end up doing zzz instead, but don't finish it.  I somehow never get around to baking that banana bread or washing my own duvet cover, which really needs it right about now.  I have to hand it to you for doing it by hand - I don't think I could deal with that right now.  I can't seem to keep up with my house cleaning either.  I was used to having a friend come in a couple of times a month to do the floors and bathrooms but that stopped in March and somehow I can't seem to keep up with it myself.  My husband does the kitchen and living/dining room floors but he is also suffering from the same Covid/ADD thing and sometimes doesn't get around to it as often as he intends to.  Before Covid I had no problem with all of this.  I took anti-anxiety medication for a while too but it made me so tired I thought I had Covid!  I had to stop taking it, but I keep it around in case I have a sleepless night because a small dose once in a while is OK.

I just spent a week going through old mail that had piled up.  I didn't realize how much there was, but it went back to the beginning of this year.  I have never been so far behind with all of that.  I back away from my neighbors too.  I have almost completely stopped going out shopping, which is also depressing because I'm one of those women that loves to shop.  Plus it doesn't help that every other day another store chain is in trouble and/or closing.  Every once in a while I have to go to the post office because I sell something on eBay.  I had to stop selling certain things because I didn't want to have to go inside during the holiday season and walk by that constant long line in that small, cramped post office.  So now I have to cram everything into a really thin slot in the box outside the P.O.  I sell mostly my used clothes but that's not always possible depending on the item.  Plus the regular 1st class mailbox was run into by a truck so they had to remove it and after 4 months they still haven't gotten the replacement they say they ordered.  So everything has to go into that tiny slot on the Priority Mail mailbox.  Ugh. 

I am doing most of my grocery ordering on Instacart, but there are always a few times a month that I have to take a risk to find something, but it's very nerve wracking.  I'm like a scene out of "Supermarket Sweep".  I'm in and out in a flash dragging huge packages of paper towels, etc.  I always try to use the self-checkout.  I went out at around 7:30 the other night to see if it was less crowded and it was really sparse in the stores near me.  These days I too pass on going into a store if it's too crowded.  If the parking lot looks too full, I don't go there.

And the mice - well my kooky neighbors got chickens so of course we're seeing more mice.  So I ordered the DCon mouse baits that kill them later.  The active ingredient is vitamin D3 which mice can't tolerate.  I hate having to kill mice but nothing else has worked.  Anyway, I put a few bait trays out and suddenly we saw mice every night.  We never saw more than one or two before this!  They were so attracted to the bait that they would risk everything running across the living room floor.  We ended up putting out some glue traps and we caught seven mice seven days in a row.  It looked like they were coming from all ends of the earth because that bait is like catnip for mice, LOL.  So anyway, now we've put the baits in the utility room so at least we don't see them in the living room.  My husband says he thinks he knows where they're coming in and wants to put steel wool in the holes, but his Covid brain is making him procrastinate on that.  When I was a kid I owned Gerbils so I'm probably more conflicted about killing mice than most people.  One night one mouse locked eyes with me and gave me the "deer in the headlights" look.  His little face with the three dots looked so scared!  So now my nightmares include feeling horrible about being a mouse murderer, LOL.   We're living the dream here, LOL.

P.S.  I'm very sorry to hear about what happened to your cousin.

Edited December 31, 2020 by Yeah No

[riverblue22]

We are now doing grocery pickup more than ever.  I am limiting my store visits, and when I do go into a store, I wear a KN95 mask.  I wear my cotton masks when I am outside or in a less enclosed environment.  I told my husband we are not going in any big box stores this winter so he can forget about Costco.  I guess there is a high rate of infection among big box employees.

[Meowwww]

7 minutes ago, Yeah No said:

Tea, I feel for you and share a lot of what you're going through right now.  I am mostly isolated myself except for my husband.  I zoom with one friend once a week or so, but I haven't seen her in months - other than running into her at the supermarket over the summer.  I haven't seen my 2 best friends in close to a year.  We talk but not often enough.  The new strain has me worried too.  Covid is already very contagious and now this is even more contagious?  Ouch.  So I'm almost completely locked down.  I am eating less and less and my clothes are fitting tighter and tighter.  It's unbelievable.  Not that I need to wear much but leggings these days anyway.  But that's so depressing.  I usually am one of those people who takes great care in how I dress and make myself up, and now I'm reduced to sweat pants and hoodies.  I have literally had to set an alarm on my cell phone to remind me to brush my teeth.  Just unbelievable.

I hear so many sad and horrible Covid stories - I was on the Covid-19 thread and someone I know from the board for years told their tale of "long hauler syndrome" that was just horrific.  I am on overload with feeling sad and worried about everyone else including my own life.  I am anxious all the time too, plus I have "Covid brain" which makes me completely ADD.  Like others, I can't start one project and finish it.  I am all over the map.  Every day I say I'm going to do xxx and yyy and end up doing zzz instead, but don't finish it.  I somehow never get around to baking that banana bread or washing my own duvet cover, which really needs it right about now.  I have to hand it to you for doing it by hand - I don't think I could deal with that right now.  I can't seem to keep up with my house cleaning either.  I was used to having a friend come in a couple of times a month to do the floors and bathrooms but that stopped in March and somehow I can't seem to keep up with it myself.  My husband does the kitchen and living/dining room floors but he is also suffering from the same Covid/ADD thing and sometimes doesn't get around to it as often as he intends to.  Before Covid I had no problem with all of this.  I took anti-anxiety medication for a while too but it made me so tired I thought I had Covid!  I had to stop taking it, but I keep it around in case I have a sleepless night because a small dose once in a while is OK.

I just spent a week going through old mail that had piled up.  I didn't realize how much there was, but it went back to the beginning of this year.  I have never been so far behind with all of that.  I back away from my neighbors too.  I have almost completely stopped going out shopping, which is also depressing because I'm one of those women that loves to shop.  Plus it doesn't help that every other day another store chain is in trouble and/or closing.  Every once in a while I have to go to the post office because I sell something on eBay.  I had to stop selling certain things because I didn't want to have to go inside during the holiday season and walk by that constant long line in that small, cramped post office.  So now I have to cram everything into a really thin slot in the box outside the P.O.  I sell mostly my used clothes but that's not always possible depending on the item.  Plus the regular 1st class mailbox was run into by a truck so they had to remove it and after 4 months they still haven't gotten the replacement they say they ordered.  So everything has to go into that tiny slot on the Priority Mail mailbox.  Ugh. 

I am doing most of my grocery ordering on Instacart, but there are always a few times a month that I have to take a risk to find something, but it's very nerve wracking.  I'm like a scene out of "Supermarket Sweep".  I'm in and out in a flash dragging huge packages of paper towels, etc.  I always try to use the self-checkout.  I went out at around 7:30 the other night to see if it was less crowded and it was really sparse in the stores near me.  These days I too pass on going into a store if it's too crowded.  If the parking lot looks too full, I don't go there.

And the mice - well my kooky neighbors got chickens so of course we're seeing more mice.  So I ordered the DCon mouse baits that kill them later.  The active ingredient is vitamin D3 which mice can't tolerate.  I hate having to kill mice but nothing else has worked.  Anyway, I put a few bait trays out and suddenly we saw mice every night.  We never saw more than one or two before this!  They were so attracted to the bait that they would risk everything running across the living room floor.  We ended up putting out some glue traps and we caught seven mice seven days in a row.  It looked like they were coming from all ends of the earth because that bait is like catnip for mice, LOL.  So anyway, now we've put the baits in the utility room so at least we don't see them in the living room.  My husband says he thinks he knows where they're coming in and wants to put steel wool in the holes, but his Covid brain is making him procrastinate on that.  When I was a kid I owned Gerbils so I'm probably more conflicted about killing mice than most people.  One night one mouse locked eyes with me and gave me the "deer in the headlights" look.  His little face with the three dots looked so scared!  So now my nightmares include feeling horrible about being a mouse murderer, LOL.   We're living the dream here, LOL.

P.S.  I'm very sorry to hear about what happened to your cousin.

Question.  How do chickens mean more mice?  
My kitty Betty Lou is a shark about killing mice.  She eats the front half and leaves the butt.  

[Meowwww]

5 hours ago, Teafortwo said:

Glad to see you back on the board, @Meowwww. I was thinking of you but I couldn'It remember your screenname. Knowing you work in a pet store, I was hoping you'd managed to stay well. 

I've been almost completely isolated. I speak with neighbors I run into in the street, backing away from them when they get too close for comfort. I participate in a a couple of weekly zoom gab sessions with friends. I speak often with a friend on the West Coast who is equally strict about avoiding others during this time. 

My favorite cousin had covid in late April through most of May. His primary symptom was delirium; he also developed pneumonia. He has been hospitalized twice, the first time for covid, the second, 4 months later, for a serious blood infection called camphylobacter. He is lucky in the sense that his main ongoing symptoms are psychological (anxiety and depression) but not otherwise physical. He can exercise; he can breathe. He also retired in August, which he'd been wanting to do for a couple years. Unfortunately his wife is not on the same page regarding caution. She had the option to teach her high school students from home, which he urged her to do, but she's chosen to go in to work every day. So he worries she and his kids will get infected, or that he'll get reinfected. 

My problems are that a couple of neighbors in my building don't follow the rules to wear masks in the hallways, basement laundry room, etc. I've been going to a local laundromat on warmer days, as there are generally few people and better air circulation there, and it is much cleaner. However, with hearing about this new, more contagious strain of the virus, I've stopped. The other day I washed my duvet cover in the bathtub. No mean feat. I live in NYC in a small apartment building, as many of you will remember.

I'm basically anxious all the time, except for when I check out and watch cat videos. Leaving and entering my building makes me anxious, since I don't know what could be floating around in the hallways (no ventilation). I'm anxious on the street, where I am continuously on the alert for people approaching without masks. I do wear a face shield over my mask. I restrict my grocery shopping to a couple of local stores, one of which limits the number of people inside. The other is small and has a plate glass window. If I see someone inside with a lowered mask, or if there are more than four shoppers inside I don't go in. I did not eat any take out food or deli sandwiches until the beginning of September. Now I purchase both about once a week. 

We've had mice and construction workers in our building throughout this whole pandemic. The construction crew is limited to one or two people due to covid, which means that the work (an apartment renovation right above me) has been protracted. They hope to finish this spring.

The worst is an inconsiderate neighbor who refuses to enter and exit his apartment quietly, which means I am often startled by the slamming door, which rattles me every time and is worse than the construction noise because it happens at all hours. 

I was severely anxious and depressed during the summer and took anxiety medicine. I was pretty much immobilized during that time and barely eating. I finally weaned myself off of the medication and began walking and eating again in late August. I discovered in late October that I'd lost 15 pounds. I could have used losing 5 but 15 was too much. I've gained some back though.

I do agree that it could be worse -- as another poster mentioned, London during WW II. I think I would have fared better if not for the situation with the neighbor. It is very unfortunate because the other neighbors are very nice. This is a kid whose father bought him the place, and he's a drug user. The co-op board admitted they made a mistake approving their purchase.  Among other things this kid travelled within the US over the summer, and did not follow NYC quarantine rules in place at the time (which increased my anxiety to a nearly paralyzing level about leaving my apartment during that time). "Hell is other people" as Sartre said.

Awww.  You’re so sweet.  
I find that most people aren’t caring about the virus.  My customers who have had it have said it was like the flu and are fine now.  
I hate the people without masks.  We had a whole family...mom, dad, 3 kids in my store claiming they had medical exemption.   They hung out for 45 minutes.  We felt they were daring us to say something.   Idiots. They kept dragging about, like “oh hey! Look at this!” Forever.  I mean, the whole family had an exemption?  yeah. not. 
I don’t run into people, on a day by day basis, who actually care.  They are all out shopping, buying hundreds of dollars of animals and stuff, with their masks hanging down past their noses. Part of me hopes for karma, but it probably won’t happen. 
My sister in law and her family had the virus.  Symptoms for maybe 2 hours.  I don’t know how to compute their supposed immunity with real life. 
Be nice to the cashiers at your stores.  You have no idea of the crap they deal with. 
 

Edited December 31, 2020 by Meowwww

[iwantcookies]

8 minutes ago, Meowwww said:

Question.  How do chickens mean more mice?  
My kitty Betty Lou is a shark about killing mice.  She eats the front half and leaves the butt.  

They feed the chickens so that attracts mice would be my guess.

[Yeah No]

Just now, Meowwww said:

Question.  How do chickens mean more mice?  
My kitty Betty Lou is a shark about killing mice.  She eats the front half and leaves the butt.  

I'm a city kid so I really don't know how that is, but my friend who grew up in these parts told me that.  He also told me to get a cat, LOL.  Mind you, they built a big chicken coop and have about 35 chickens.  This on two acres in what is more of a suburban area to normally find such a big chicken coop.  They've already had noise complaints from their closer neighbors because of a particularly loud and annoying rooster.  I am lucky because I'm further away and only my garage faces that direction.  Plus the windows keep out the noise.  I just read online that improperly stored chicken feed can attract mice.  Ugh.

[Meowwww]

2 minutes ago, Yeah No said:

I'm a city kid so I really don't know how that is, but my friend who grew up in these parts told me that.  He also told me to get a cat, LOL.  Mind you, they built a big chicken coop and have about 35 chickens.  This on two acres in what is more of a suburban area to normally find such a big chicken coop.  They've already had noise complaints from their closer neighbors because of a particularly loud and annoying rooster.  I am lucky because I'm further away and only my garage faces that direction.  Plus the windows keep out the noise.  I just read online that improperly stored chicken feed can attract mice.  Ugh.

Our neighbors have chickens.  I don’t even hear the rooster anymore, even though he is loud lol. 
Most of the cats I’ve owned or fostered couldn’t care less.  But my Betty Lou is a huntress. She once caught a gopher who was somehow in our basement.  I ran out the door screaming lol.  

[Absolom]

11 minutes ago, Meowwww said:

Be nice to the cashiers at your stores.  You have no idea of the crap they deal with. 

I found myself apologizing to the cashier at the grocery store today for needing groceries so close to a holiday.

[Gramto6]

I watched one of my ferrals (Fluffy Kitty) stalk and ultimately kill a mouse outside. Having 3 ferrals around is definitely keeping the mouse population down. I (haven't figured out if it is male or female) it stalked, batted it around and when it tried to run it caught it again. I had to stop watching when it was tossing the mouse way up in the air and running to where it landed...this kitty is well fed by me but its a real mouser! And given my mouse problems...go for it Fluffy! I wonder if cats can chase snakes away???

[Jeanne222]

I guess I'm pretty lucky and just hanging in there.  Hubby took a fall yesterday and I had to call my grandson out for a lift.  Thank goodness he didn't get hurt.

I no longer to to the gym three times a week, no restaurants since last March!  I used to enjoy an afternoon at the casino but that's out too.  No movies just tv.

But I try to be thankful for what I do have.  My husband, a warm home, groceries, books, puzzles and a nice big window to watch the world go by.

This kind of reminds me of Anne Frank and her isolation or being in jail for years and years.r

I never thought this would go on for such a long time but here we are!

Hugs to all.  As I tell my family everything has a beginning and an end!  This too shall pass.

[Rabbit Hutch]

6 hours ago, Gramto6 said:

I watched one of my ferrals (Fluffy Kitty) stalk and ultimately kill a mouse outside. Having 3 ferrals around is definitely keeping the mouse population down. I (haven't figured out if it is male or female) it stalked, batted it around and when it tried to run it caught it again. I had to stop watching when it was tossing the mouse way up in the air and running to where it landed...this kitty is well fed by me but its a real mouser! And given my mouse problems...go for it Fluffy! I wonder if cats can chase snakes away???

Well, IMHO, they can and they do, but it's risky for them.

A few years back we had several outdoor cats take up residence in and around our area, and we saw nary a snake.  The cats have all gone to different homes, now, and we since then had 3 copperhead sightings, one of which bit someone's dog during last spring alone.  One of those cats was also an excellent mouser.

Hawks are also awesome snake hunters, but again, it's a risk for them.  Are you located in Montana?

[laurakaye]

I have been one who still goes to the grocery store once a week.  I usually hit up my local Aldi, where I know the layout like the back of my hand and can get in and out in under 20 minutes.  I mask up, I wipe down the cart and use the hand sanitizer (both provided by the store), get it done, head on out and sanitize my hands as soon as I get back in my car.  I have also been known to do a little browsing at Target - always masked, always social distancing.  I don't know if it's smart or stupid.  All I know is I am craving some sense of normalcy and this is how I get it.  I do recall back in May going to Target for some things and browsing the candles (because if I was going to be stuck at home then I at least deserved a nice-smelling candle, I rationalized) but then thinking, what am I doing??  I can't browse!  This is not what I should be doing at all!  But if I can't buy Clorox wipes then I need this candle and also this giant tub of peanut butter trail mix and also this party-sized bag of M&M's is going in my cart...it was like I forgot how to grocery shop.

I am thinking of taking some time each night and journaling about this past year, month by month.  I think it will help me process a little bit, and also give me something to look back on.  It seems like 10 years ago that my family and I went to St. Augustine back in early March of 2020 and seeing a handful of people wearing masks at the airports and wondering if they were perhaps taking this a bit too seriously.  A week after we returned home, we were in lockdown.  It still sometimes feels like a bizarre fever dream.

Edited December 31, 2020 by laurakaye

[Jeanne222]

1 hour ago, laurakaye said:

I have been one who still goes to the grocery store once a week.  I usually hit up my local Aldi, where I know the layout like the back of my hand and can get in and out in under 20 minutes.  I mask up, I wipe down the cart and use the hand sanitizer (both provided by the store), get it done, head on out and sanitize my hands as soon as I get back in my car.  I have also been known to do a little browsing at Target - always masked, always social distancing.  I don't know if it's smart or stupid.  All I know is I am craving some sense of normalcy and this is how I get it.  I do recall back in May going to Target for some things and browsing the candles (because if I was going to be stuck at home then I at least deserved a nice-smelling candle, I rationalized) but then thinking, what am I doing??  I can't browse!  This is not what I should be doing at all!  But if I can't buy Clorox wipes then I need this candle and also this giant tub of peanut butter trail mix and also this party-sized bag of M&M's is going in my cart...it was like I forgot how to grocery shop.

I am thinking of taking some time each night and journaling about this past year, month by month.  I think it will help me process a little bit, and also give me something to look back on.  It seems like 10 years ago that my family and I went to St. Augustine back in early March of 2020 and seeing a handful of people wearing masks at the airports and wondering if they were perhaps taking this a bit too seriously.  A week after we returned home, we were in lockdown.  It still sometimes feels like a bizarre fever dream.

I go to aldis too!  Something different each visit.  I think target is a good plan.  Walking exercise is good.

Once this icy mess melts I'm heading over there.

It's just not good to sit all day.

[deirdra]

2 hours ago, laurakaye said:

I have been one who still goes to the grocery store once a week.  I usually hit up my local Aldi, where I know the layout like the back of my hand and can get in and out in under 20 minutes. 

I go for groceries every 10-14 days, first thing in the morning when it is empty. I know the layouts of the two grocery stores I've been going to for 30 years, but both have been moving stuff around causing me to spend an extra minute or two to find things.

[xwordfanatik]

10 hours ago, Jeanne222 said:

I guess I'm pretty lucky and just hanging in there.  Hubby took a fall yesterday and I had to call my grandson out for a lift.  Thank goodness he didn't get hurt.

I no longer to to the gym three times a week, no restaurants since last March!  I used to enjoy an afternoon at the casino but that's out too.  No movies just tv.

But I try to be thankful for what I do have.  My husband, a warm home, groceries, books, puzzles and a nice big window to watch the world go by.

This kind of reminds me of Anne Frank and her isolation or being in jail for years and years.r

I never thought this would go on for such a long time but here we are!

Hugs to all.  As I tell my family everything has a beginning and an end!  This too shall pass.

I'm in a similar situation.  I too am thankful that I have what I have.  It's a huge plus to be retired.  I worry pretty much all the time, about a lot of things (who doesn't?)  It makes me angry/sad that there have been so many people going on as if nothing is different.  There will more than likely be spreader events galore tonight, just like there were over the earlier holidays.  It's wonderful to have a safe place to talk here on the forum, and I'm grateful that everyone here is so kind and understanding.  I used to like grocery shopping, but I haven't done it in person since early March.  Thank heavens there's grocery pickup at a favorite store here, and Instacart is available, too.  I'll be watching Twilight Zone off and on today, and I got a bottle of pink champagne for Mr. X and me tonight.  We usually don't stay up until midnight since we retired from our swing shift jobs over ten years ago.  Virtual hugs to all of you!

[Teafortwo]

43 minutes ago, deirdra said:

I go for groceries every 10-14 days, first thing in the morning when it is empty. I know the layouts of the two grocery stores I've been going to for 30 years, but both have been moving stuff around causing me to spend an extra minute or two to find things.

I just placed my first order for curbside pickup at the one small grocery store I've been going to every 10 days or so myself. I tried to shop there yesterday and there was a long line (somewhat socially distanced) and the last guy in line had his mask on his chin. Plus there were a couple of vagrant types hovering nearby, unmasked. One was yelling loudly. There is a homeless support center in the building next door to the market, but the men weren't going inside, just standing around. I watched from across the street for awhile - then two people on that side started unloading a van and a girl came up the street talking on phone. None of them had masks either. I left. 

I feel bad too that my pickup is at 7 PM tonight but it was the only time available. I'm out of milk and most everything is closed tomorrow. I've also started getting my medications mailed from CVS (two blocks away), because every time I've been in there it's either crowded, or people disobeying the mask rules. Usually both. I freaked out (silently) the last two times I was in there, and that was before hearing about the new "more contagious" virus strain.  

I like the idea of writing about what this is like, @laurakaye. Everyone on this board is an excellent writer, to boot!

Re: the mice, I have a dread of glue traps and having to put an animal out of it's glued misery (or worse, I've heard of mice chewing their legs off to escape). I've tried a catch and release trap but didn't catch anything. I caught a tiny mouse in a battery operated zap trap. The standard Victor traps with peanut butter do not work for me at all. In late October I began volunteering with a foster program at a local rescue. I had a foster cat for over a month and have not seen a mouse since. Even if the cat doesn't catch mice (mine didn't), the smell of the cat is a deterrent. Plus I love cats. I had hesitated to take in a cat due to allergies, since I haven't gotten my monthly allergy shot since late Feb. But with a lot of vacuuming and some Zyrtec/Flonase etc I was okay. I strongly recommend getting a cat (or fostering) for so many reasons. They are lovely animals. I am not ready for the long-term responsibility of cat ownership so fostering works for me. You get to see so many different personalities. Cats are really wonderful. They used to get a bad rap for not being sociable but most really love their humans (food source). It's just on their own terms.

Edited December 31, 2020 by Teafortwo

[Teafortwo]

21 hours ago, xwordfanatik said:

MFM, we know that you have a great sense of humor, and I agree with LK, your Strife posts are hilarious.  You write well, and as Sandy says, with your experience and writing ability, do consider a travel blog.  You have a lot of love here.

@Mahamid Frauded Me I wanted to second this. You are a great wit and express yourself so well. Sending much love and hopes that we can all get back to traveling soon!

[Teafortwo]

12 hours ago, Meowwww said:

I find that most people aren’t caring about the virus.

People have a huge ability to delude themselves. I read yesterday that a newly-elected Congressman from Louisiana died of the virus. Age 41. I am so thankful for people like you who work in stores. Last week I tipped $4 on a $16 purchase (Christmas week, after all). Then came home and discovered my "whole grain" bagels were plain bagels. The lovely clerk misheard me through my mask and face shield (plus English is his second language). So "grain" was heard as "plain." They were delicious anyway. Not trying to virtue signal here - I just know they (and you) work hard and at one point I worked at a Barnes & Noble so I know how tough it is to be on one's feet all day.

[Teafortwo]

14 hours ago, Yeah No said:

And yes, it could always be worse, but when I say that my therapist tells me not to diminish what I'm going through because it is really bad and I'm handling it better than I think I am.

Very good and caring advice! I think everyone has mental health issues now. I suspect that those with the worst issues are the ones who are in complete denial. Those of us who are more realistic are at least processing our emotions to some degree in real time. When I am out and about I try to remind myself that everyone has had some form of psychological distress from all this. Helps control my anger at those who are running around unmasked. Who knows what issues they're dealing with. (ETA: if I had to deal with unmasked customers where I work, I think anger is completely justified as they are endangering others' lives!)

My cousin's wife (high school teacher) will be eligible for the vaccine soon and she is going to refuse it. Mind you, she and their kids have all had measles shots, etc. with no ill effects. I hope she will change her mind but she feels that it's all in the hands of the deity as to whether one lives, survives or dies. I wish she had more trust in human science. If one believes in a higher power it follows logically that this higher power created humans and endowed them with human ingenuity to solve medical crises. Oh well.

Edited December 31, 2020 by Teafortwo

[Teafortwo]

On 12/29/2020 at 10:45 PM, Meowwww said:

This game of do I have it, did I have it is killing me.  I’m so over the worry.  
When I get sick, I get really sick.  So I’m stressing about if this is COVID, if it is, how bad will it get?   Did I already have it?

At the risk of "spamming" the Board with my multiple posts, I'm having these fears today. I may have a fever and chills, or it may be hot flashes due to stopping my hormone replacement medication a couple weeks ago, combined with a drafty apartment. I've only been in and out of a couple stores in the past 10 days, including the deli and UPS store (quick dropoff) yesterday. I took the car to my mechanic on Monday, but all interactions took place outdoors with masks. This is the first time I've really had this sort of worry and it's possibly due to lack of sleep. I hope!

My close friend who is a school nurse in NJ just got her first round of the vaccine. She's so happy!

Edited December 31, 2020 by Teafortwo

[Rabbit Hutch]

1 hour ago, xwordfanatik said:

"..."    I'll be watching Twilight Zone off and on today, and I got a bottle of pink champagne for Mr. X and me tonight.  We usually don't stay up until midnight since we retired from our swing shift jobs over ten years ago.  Virtual hugs to all of you!

You too, hun.  We're pulling the rig up short @ 4:00pm, sharp.  The craziness begins early on New Year's Eve, with folks hitting the hooch early round this holiday.  Doesn't pay to be on the roads, tonight.  🤨

Happy New Year, one and all.  Make sure to eat your black eyed peas and collards tomorrow for good luck.  🎉

[LydiaE]

Here is a different perspective. Maybe it will help, or not.

*Demographic and locale seem to be the deciding factors re: how one copes with the current situation schema. Large cities include paranoid people packed together. Apathy and squalor are the negative traits of such an area. Read up on Calhoun’s experiments with mice and behavioral sink.

*Worrying about getting sick is a short-term and counterproductive action. The productive things you can do: proper diet, stimulate immune system, supplement vit D, C, magnesium, zinc, selenium in sane amounts. Avoid unhealthy destructive life choices: alcohol, drugs(which includes most of your common prescriptions aside from insulin and thyroid replacement), obesity, smoking, artificial additives, sedentary habits, promiscuity. You will eventually get sick, and complete isolation is literally impossible.

*If you don’t have a cohesive family or peer group, of course you will feel isolated and despairing and lack confidence. Don’t discuss or squabble about politics, religion, or social programming. You will isolate yourself.

I live in a suburb of a mid-sized city and am married with a grown daughter and teenaged son. Aside from masking regulations at some retailers, health care facilities and schools, life is pretty much the same as always. Daycares never closed. School employees and students/store employees wear masks under noses and on chins.  Families and friends still socialize and get together. The nurses I know only complain about being overworked because so many healthcare positions were cut or omitted from March to June of 2020. My husband is Active Duty military and nothing much has changed except that deployments seem to be shorter in duration. 

Heres what I worry about:

1) Selfishly, my teenage son because his future is uncertain. Many of society’s rules seemed to change in an instant.

2) The elderly that are isolated and vulnerable in nursing homes and facilities. This sickens me.

3) Long-term starvation, and this is very much a real thing. Soybean crops worldwide have been decimated. Those feed our livestock and stretch our food stores. The culling of domesticated animals and livestock (mink, pigs, fowl, etc). Most of us have never had to worry about obtaining food. Many of us are fat and/or eating disordered. Starving scares me more than acute respiratory failure or sepsis.

4) And most importantly- a freakin bioweapon was released upon the world and no one has been held accountable. I guarantee it’s not the first and it won’t be the last! The world is run by selfish and greedy people.

The only real hope we have is each other.

[Mayor McCheese]

1 hour ago, LydiaE said:

And most importantly- a freakin bioweapon was released upon the world and no one has been held accountable.

I'm fairly certain they don't prosecute bats at The Hague. 

Could be wrong though.

[Gramto6]

8 hours ago, Rabbit Hutch said:

Well, IMHO, they can and they do, but it's risky for them.

A few years back we had several outdoor cats take up residence in and around our area, and we saw nary a snake.  The cats have all gone to different homes, now, and we since then had 3 copperhead sightings, one of which bit someone's dog during last spring alone.  One of those cats was also an excellent mouser.

Hawks are also awesome snake hunters, but again, it's a risk for them.  Are you located in Montana?

Yes, I am in Montana, south of Missoula. The snakes I have around are not poisonous, just common green snakes.

[Kbo]

Hugs to everyone going through such challenging times.  @Mahamid Frauded Me, I am so sorry to hear what you've been going through.  Like others have said though, hang in there because there's going to be a huge travel rush coming!  My family hasn't planned anything for next year yet, but I'm hoping we can get the vaccine and at some point it'll be safe to go visit my parents.  We're clear across the country from them, and haven't seen them in over a year at this point 😟.  They're in their late 70's, so it's tough not seeing them but at the same time there's no way I'd risk exposing them.  Unfortunately, my mom has some severe allergies (she carries an epi-pen), so not sure when it will be safe for her to get the vaccine.

I truly am blessed, and I'm grateful every day, but at the same time it's hard for me not to sink into a depression with everything going on.  The short days and being stuck indoors isn't helping, even with a therapy light.  I'm coping by doing projects around the house.  We've redone our main bedroom, freshened up the laundry area when we got a new washer/dryer, and right now we're working on our pantry.  I was just going to clean and reorganize, and somehow it turned into ripping out the shelves altogether!  And we're going to replace the bi-fold doors that had seen better days.  I'm also turning an area that had a rack with open shelves into a coffee station.  I don't have a lot of counter space for appliances, so getting the Keurig and my electric tea kettle out of the way will be huge!  I want to get shelves over the cabinet, too.  The only down side to all this is that it gets expensive quick!  We're doing it in stages, though.  Some of the accessories can wait a bit.  It'll be nice to come out of quarantine with these projects done--I know when we're finally free again, the last thing I'll want to do is be cooped up in the house reorganizing!

The one thing I'm really excited about is that I have a second job interview next week for a new position within my company.  I don't like my current job, or my current management, so I'm really hoping this works out.  I don't even care about more money at this point, I just want a different job that I don't dread doing every day.  

Anyway, here's to hoping for a better 2021 for us all!

[LydiaE]

34 minutes ago, Mayor McCheese said:

I'm fairly certain they don't prosecute bats at The Hague. 

Could be wrong though.

Now is not the time for naïveté.

[Roslyn]

2 hours ago, Rabbit Hutch said:

Happy New Year, one and all.  Make sure to eat your black eyed peas and collards tomorrow for good luck.  🎉

Happy New Year!  In Pennsylvania pork and sauerkraut are traditional New Year's day fare. I make Halushki with Kielbasa.  I use my homemade noodles and it is a really simple dish, but so delicious as well. 

Chickens (and all livestock) attract rodents because of spilled food.  It's usually in the same area, around feeders, so mice and rats can set up house close by the easy to find food source. In the past I have had some chickens who would hunt the mice themselves (they are also predators...not just prey) but usually they only partially swallow a mouse and then I have had the fun of chasing the chicken.  Catching the chicken. And then pulling the damn mouse out of the chicken.

In my rural area of Western Pennsylvania I do not see issues with people.  Yes there are a growing number of maskless in the market, but not a huge number that I have seen.  We were out one morning and my husband wanted to pick up a coffee at Starbucks.  He didn't realize that they had closed the dining room (locally has been back and forth with open dining and closed.) and so we were in the drive thru when there was a man walking back and forth and shouting political things at the cars.  That was probably the oddest thing I have seen locally. 

I do my own shopping and have since the beginning. I have claustrophobia pretty bad, especially having my face covered in any way, and in the beginning of mask wearing it took me a long time to "come back down" after shopping. I make sure I go prepared with a detailed list that is in order of the store that I'm going to.  I can focus on the list and keeping distance from other people and it helps me get through the panic from the mask.

I never disinfected my groceries, but I am the only person who touches them and they still get quarantined.  I constantly wash my hands while cooking etc. In the early days I kept a close eye on if the illness was being traced to in store shopping.  My son works night shift in a grocery store and has stayed Covid free this year.  I try to shop at slow times and I take care of my routine in the car with hand sanitizer and wipes for my wallet and keys etc.

I consider myself (and my family) lucky that we are not go out people.  I prefer my quiet life at home and I would go to the pottery studio once a week as my "big" outing.  Now my only outing is the market or liquor store or Lowes. 

As for the stress that creeps into your head even if you DO avoid news/social media/people in general...well.  I do my best to focus on one small thing at a time that needs done.  In the beginning my husband and I were online reading WAY too much.  We both had to cut that out and focus on in home things and the garden.  Since my garden needs a whole lot of work I only focused on bringing back a small garden next to my back patio that had been hit with a flood and was filled with weeds.  It is now an herb garden and I am slowly resetting all the bricks that were dragged through the yard.  My greenhouse was the biggest project this year.  My husband pulled the old one down and replaced it with a new door and built another bench so it is ready as soon as the season starts in the Spring.  We started redoing my beds into smaller raised beds as well. I even got garlic planted on time. Plus small house jobs.  I found that if anything is too big it quickly gets overwhelming and derails both of us from getting things done. 

My dental issues hit at the start of September.  I was on antibiotics and it just put my life into slow motion.  I have to make a list everyday of everything or I will quickly forget.  I have a notebook that I write in and I keep a timeline (with phone alarms) so I don't forget the time and miss taking my medication or even forgetting to feed the dog/cat or start dinner.  I just finished the last round of antibiotics and I don't need pain medication anymore either.  So tonight is a double celebration that I can finally have alcohol ! I'm making a blood orange whiskey sour-ish drink with Makers Mark and making it bubbly with some Moscato. Cheers ladies 😁

[Scarlett45]

Moderator Announcement- a reminder to everyone to adhere to the #1 Rule here at Primetimer is Be Civil . Disagreement and discussion is fine, name calling or belittling people for their opinions is not. 

[iwantcookies]

I think I’m going to become a vegetarian. Picturing a chicken eating a mouse just did it for me. 
 

I recently opened a can of spam that went bad.  I am never eating spam again either.

[Gramto6]

47 minutes ago, iwantcookies said:

 I recently opened a can of spam that went bad.  I am never eating spam again either.

My first husband was Chinese. I learned to cook mostly from his mom. They used a lot of Spam in their cooking. I still use it, but not so much any more. I keep a few of the small tins in the pantry for emergency use or if nothing else feels like it tastes good to me...

[Pickleinthemiddle]

2 hours ago, Gramto6 said:

My first husband was Chinese. I learned to cook mostly from his mom. They used a lot of Spam in their cooking. I still use it, but not so much any more. I keep a few of the small tins in the pantry for emergency use or if nothing else feels like it tastes good to me...

Growing up I remember my mom slicing up the spam and frying it in a little oil.  It seemed like a treat to us because we didn't eat it very often.  Tomorrow my mom is fixing Black eyed peas and cabbage with fried salmon patties.  But we always have the peas and cabbage on new years day.   The peas for good luck and cabbage for prosperity.

 

It's 11:45 I just heard some fireworks in my neighborhood.  

 

Happy New Year to everyone on PT.  

[Yeah No]

Hey everyone, Happy New Year!

I have reason to celebrate - the young couple that is buying my father's apartment in the Bronx already signed the contract!  They are very motivated because they've been living in her parents' house out on Long Island for a couple of years.  They were living in a rental in my father's neighborhood before that but decided to save money to buy something, which is why they went from there to her family's house.  The husband is from the Bronx and Yonkers.  He is a microbiologist and I don't know what she is, but they seem like nice people and good prospects for board approval.  Some of you know my tendency for being a little psychic, but I've had a feeling about them from the start and I think my parents are approving greatly from the beyond on them being the right people to sell to.  It feels like destiny.  I know, I'm getting too cosmic about this, but it means a lot to me to really like who buys the apartment given how much it has meant to me and my family for 46 years.  I am hoping for a wrinkle-free closing, hopefully sooner than 3 months from now.  It's amazing that my father's money runs out in just about 3 months.  This didn't happen a minute too soon.  The apartment was only on the market a month, plus it went for almost asking price during the holiday season no less!  For once in a very long time I am feeling fortunate.  I just hope that this is the start of a change of luck for me and everyone in the new year.  

@Mahamid Frauded Me I've been thinking about you.  My husband and I have been teetering on the edge for a while now.  He owns a limousine and has had next to no work since March.  His livelihood depends on the travel industry - airport runs and business travel primarily.  We've been surviving on unemployment and small business loans, plus a mortgage deferral which is going to expire in a few months.  We currently have our lawyer working on getting the amount of the principal lowered - It's a long story but back a decade or more ago during the recession both of us were laid off (he was then an assistant manager in a dealership service department and I was an exec. assistant).  Our house ended up in pre-foreclosure but we never could seem to qualify for any of that government sponsored refinance help that was supposed to be extended to people in our situation.  So in the end the bank refinanced our mortgage but slapped an extra $50,000 on the principal balance without really justifying it.  We didn't want to foreclose so we took the offer, but it was not a good one.  Our lawyer told us recently that he thought that the lender wouldn't be able to justify or account for that extra amount being added to the loan so he is now challenging them to do that.  The loan has changed hands several times over in the last decade so we are hoping they won't be able to account for it and will have to reduce the principal.  We know that there was no good reason for it anyway. 

If that doesn't happen I don't know what we're going to do, though.  The back payments will have to be made when the deferral is up and that's a lot of money.  Of course I'll probably have the money from my parents' apartment by then but I was hoping not to have to dip into that money for something like that.  We're going to need that money for our retirement.  It's like two steps forward, two steps back all the time.  I fear that money is going to be gone in a flash on things like this. Plus my husband is worried that he won't have much work even when things pick up again just because travel might never go back to where it was before the pandemic.  Businesses have gotten used to conducting meetings virtually and there might not be so much limo. work anymore.  We don't know what we're going to be dealing with.  He is turning 65 in March but he can't retire on full SS until 66.  So we are very concerned about our financial futures right now.

And never mind about me finding a job either.  At 62 forget it.  I was wrongfully terminated from my last job at 58.  It was just an excuse to get rid of a 58 year old woman, I am sure of that because they did this kind of thing all the time.  As soon as a woman got to be a certain age she was likely to disappear unless she was extremely well connected, and only a very few of those survived.  They took advantage of the fact that I had broken my arm in their parking lot and was on workers' comp. to figure it was as good a time as any to lay me off.  But they didn't realize that it was against the law to terminate someone while on workers' comp.  So I won a lawsuit with them.  After that I looked for a job for over 2 years until mid 2019 with no luck and eventually gave up.  Meanwhile, when I was younger I used to have multiple offers.  The last time I got a job was 10 years ago when I was 52 and it took me a year and a half to find THAT.  I have read that there's this invisible cut-off point for women at 50.  There was a great article in the NYT about this a few years ago.  There are several articles about it online.  I know that's not good news, but it seems that women suffer age discrimination at a relatively young age compared to men.  When I think about it, I can count on two fingers the number of women I ever saw being hired after the age of 50 as executive assistants in any of the companies I have ever worked for.  And the only reason one of them got hired is because her boss hated hiring assistants and asked ME to make the final decision between 3 candidates because I was an executive assistant so she valued my opinion.  The woman I chose, who is now retired, is one of my best friends to this day.

Oh, and BTW, I am a BIG Aldi fan - I just placed a big order with them yesterday on Instacart.  I haven't been to the store in 2 months already.  They just opened one 2 miles from me in September.  Before that I used to have to drive out of my way about 10 miles.

And when I was talking about mice above, we caught 7 mice in 7 days, not 7 mice a day for 7 days - I realized it might have sounded like more than it was.

 

 

Edited January 1, 2021 by Yeah No

[Kohola3]

8 hours ago, Yeah No said:

I have reason to celebrate - the young couple that is buying my father's apartment in the Bronx already signed the contract! 

Congratulations and thanks for sharing!  Heaven knows we all need good news!

As with everyone else, I hope for some major positive changes very quickly.  The vaccine has certainly perked me up, just no idea when it will be available but I've survived this long by isolating so will keep on keeping on until it's my turn.  Whenever I feel inclined to whine I try to harken back to Anne Frank living in an attic for two years.  We can do this.  We don't have to like it but we can do this.

[Mahamid Frauded Me]

@Yeah No  Thank you. I know you have had quite a year as well and I am truly sorry for your loss. Some days I just feel like selling my house, thankfully I have about 100K in equity in it now ( if the market stays this way) and then pay off all my bills and move to another state, like the Carolina's. I have been vacationing there for the last few years and just love it, granted, I can't afford a beach house, but a small cozy cottage near a lake or river would be lovely and then just work as a cashier at a Food Lion or something, I could be happy.

I just want to reach out to everyone else on this board, that you are all wonderful, caring and supportive people. I love coming here for the laughs and insight each one of you bring.

I wish everyone a Healthy, Happy New Year and never quit snarking!

 

[Kohola3]

1 hour ago, Mahamid Frauded Me said:

I just want to reach out to everyone else on this board, that you are all wonderful, caring and supportive people. I love coming here for the laughs and insight each one of you bring.

It's actually kind of ironic that we've formed a virtual family on a board dedicated to the most dysfunctional bunch of "married" people on TV!

And on a different topic, my stimulus money was deposited already.  Not available until the 4th but it's in the credit union as a pending transaction.  

Edited January 1, 2021 by Kohola3
online banking reveal

[Kbo]

We got our stimulus money, too. Wasn’t expecting it this quickly, was a nice surprise for the day.   And @Yeah No, totally agree about age discrimination in the workplace. I just turned 50, and I’m not going to stop coloring my hair any time soon. I want to pass for being in my forties as long as I can. Fortunately, I inherited good genes so I don’t have a lot of wrinkles yet.  Really sad that we have to think this way 🙁

[Gramto6]

Just want to wish everyone here a Very Happy and Healthy New Year!! You guys are the best!

I will have to go to the PO to check and see if my check is there. I get my SS direct deposited so I don't understand why I got a papaer check the first time around. It's weird.

[Kohola3]

46 minutes ago, Gramto6 said:

I will have to go to the PO to check and see if my check is there. I get my SS direct deposited so I don't understand why I got a papaer check the first time around. It's weird.

I heard, but cannot affirm it as there is so much crap info out there, that how you receive your IRS money that is the key.  I have my refund direct deposited (all $35 of it last year) and that's what shows as the source on my credit union statement for the stimulus check.

[Gramto6]

19 minutes ago, Kohola3 said:

I heard, but cannot affirm it as there is so much crap info out there, that how you receive your IRS money that is the key.  I have my refund direct deposited (all $35 of it last year) and that's what shows as the source on my credit union statement for the stimulus check.

Thanks, that explains it I guess. I am surviving on SS and don't make enough to pay let alone get a refund. My tax person says I wouldn't even have to file if not for my investment account which is carefully set up to not incur taxes, but still has to be reported.

[Absolom]

My mother's social security is direct deposited and she's already received the $600.  I was rather shocked when I checked her account and there it was.

 

[MargeGunderson]

I’m glad the checks are getting to people so quickly. It will be a relief for a lot of people (although not enough for people who have been hard hit by the pandemic).

[Absolom]

Good thing to get it to my mother quickly at her age although I admit she doesn't need it.

[Gramto6]

I will go to the PO either tomorrow or Monday and hope to find a chek. I don't "need" it but it will make life a bit easier any infusion is welcome. 

In the winter here I struggle with heating bills any bit ifg help is welcome.

Edited January 2, 2021 by Gramto6

[Gramto6]

3 minutes ago, Gramto6 said:

I will go to the PO either tomorrow or Monday and hope to find a chek. I don't "need" it but it will make life a bit easier any infusion is welcome. 

In the winter here I struggle with heating bills any bit of help is welcome.

Again  a typo post double posted...don't know how... 

Edited January 2, 2021 by Gramto6

[suomi]

Happy New Year, y'all. We survived 2020 (when so many did not). Bless us every one.

Here's a gift for my sistas -- a feel good story with a photo and video of a handsome peace officer with a big heart.

Somerset Police Officer Matt Lima was called to a Stop & Shop grocery store on December 20 after store security said the women didn't scan everything that they put in their bags at a self-checkout register, according to a statement on the police department's website.

The women, who had two small children with them, were stopped as they left the store, police said.

Lima took one of the women aside so they could talk about what happened without the children hearing. Store employees kept the kids occupied, so they wouldn't know what was going on.

"The woman I talked to, she explained she was working, but the mother of the children was not working and had some other family issues going on and that what she had taken was Christmas dinner for the kids," Lima told WJAR.

He looked at the receipt to see what the women had planned to buy and saw they were just getting food.

"Obviously, this family was in need and I can't imagine having to make the decision to go to Stop & Shop and just only pay for what I can afford -- or do I go there and try to take things for Christmas dinner for the kids?" 

He served them with a notice not to trespass, but did not press charges, police said.

"They were very thankful, they were kind of shocked. I'm sure a lot of people in that same situation would be thinking that there was going to be a different outcome, and maybe they would be arrested or have to go to court."

Lima bought a $250 gift card for the women, so they could buy their groceries at a different store.

https://www.cnn.com/2021/01/02/us/shoplifting-christmas-police-trnd/index.html

Edited January 2, 2021 by suomi
typo