S07.E08: The Cavi-Art Of War

[motorcitymom65]

I may be misunderstanding, but I thought bravofan27 was just demonstrating how Heather's thought process works.

Got it. Maybe I should stay off these forums late at night when my brain is clearly not working.

IMO that pretend conversation sounds much like any of the many interactions we have seen this year with most everyone. Sonja thanking Beth for her concern and acting like Beth understands her in AC, and then saying something entirely different about Beth in her TH interviews. Taking about Beth "projecting", which is very different than what she said to Beth. Beth coming to meet Sonja's "team", asking some good questions, leaving everyone including Sonja feeling very good about the meeting (to the extent they are popping champagne), all the while Beth is telling her assistant and the audience that Sonja is delusional and probably being taken advantage of. She certainly said none of those things to Sonja at the time, and Sonja said in her blog that she was disappointed to hear the things that Beth was saying about her. Beth mocking Sonja and her magazine deal like crazy, but congratulating Sonja and the team on such a score at the event. No mention of Equine magazine to them, which was funny as hell but, also shady considering how she was fawning all over them. Even Ramona sucking up to Sonja at the event but actually thinking it was completely dumb, as she said in her TH. They all smile, give kisses and hugs, and then snark like crazy. I would be surprised to find that they dislike Heather more for this trait than they do the others.

[WireWrap]

But changing custody can always be re-approached, correct? If he felt he had evidence showing reasons why he should have her more then Beth, wouldn't he be able to try for that again at any time?  A petition to modify. 

 

Considering Beth is paying his legal fees too, I wouldn't put it past him

 

And what did she say to Carol about it? I heard her talking about wanting real glasses, etc. but I also heard her say she doesn't want to talk about it while she apologized for being emotional but that she needs to spend time with her kid. 

 

Outside of her saying she wants to spend time with her kid over the HW's that's really the most I've heard her say about it with the other wives (besides R and S and Lu == all people she has known for years) 

Of course, either side could re-file the custody issue but if that is such a giant concern of hers then why come on the show to begin with? Bethenny has said something to each HW something about her 50% custody of Bryn, all of them. Bethenny was the first person to say anything about it on camera.

 

Bravo wanted Bethenny badly so they agreed to her conditions, she can't attend events when she has "her" time with her daughter and that is it. Bravo could have said "sorry, that is not how it works, you must be present in all and every event or you can't have this job" but that is not what they did, right? They wanted her badly so they took whatever she could offer. I doubt Bethenny lied to them.

 

I doubt that Bethenny commited herself to be available to their filming schedule 24/7 and is now just being a "bad worker" by not going to some events, if that was the case she would be fired, Bravo wanted to have her in any capacity they could have her and that is all there is to it. Of course the others are reeling at that and find ways to point that she has been missing events when in reality they have shown Bethenny at almost every single gathering, her absence has not been hugely noticed.

 

I didn't see anybody making a huge deal out of all the events that Lisa Vanderpump missed the last two seasons, I didn't see anybody complaining that she was getting the good edit because she was allowed to skip more events tham she could attend, she has businesses to run and other show to film for, she has all the money she can possibly need so why even do the show? To showcase her business that is all, same as Bethenny. Bravo could had take her or leave it and they took her. Those are allowances Bravo makes with their HW, not all of them, just certain but this is not a unique situation at all.

 

Lisa Vanderpump went through a huge lawsuit deal that she lost, did any of her castmates felt the need to ask her about it? Nope. Did any of them offered their unsolicited support regarding this issue? Nope. There are just some lines that regular people do not cross but those lines are blurred with Heather, she comes too soon, too strong and then complains when people back off from her. heather is not a long time friend of Bethenny to be asking these things, the fact that Bethenny is talking bout how she doesn't want to miss any time with her daughter because she has her only half of the time doesn't mean that Heather asks the details of the many nights she spends at home and then interjects that she has to change that. I bet if Bethenny could change that she would have but millions of dollar later it is what it is.

 

Heather doesn't see it wrong in any way because that is just part of her abrassive personality and she figures she shows her concern but IMO I would react the same way Bethenny did. Heather needs to relax and let the conversation flow naturally and not push the issues so much, it is very annoying.

There would be no way that any of the other HWs would know if Bethenny has a different contract that allows her to not film when she has custody of Bryn. Second, we do not know if she has that stipulated in her contract either, Bethenny has not made that claim on camera or in the press. Third, Bethenny, herself, admitted to missing functions/filming. Fourth, someone posted the transcript of their conversation earlier and Heather was not "pushing" Bethenny to talk about anything she already had not mentioned/talked about. Fifth, talk about "abrasive" personalities, LOL, that term is also perfect for Bethenny!

Edited May 28, 2015 by WireWrap

[Celia Rubenstein]

I think Heather likes having as many pieces of a puzzle in front of her as she can. In her blog this week, she talks about wanting to "bring clarity" to the custody situation. But I don't think Bethenny cares if Heather is 100% clear or not. In fact, she definitely prefers the opposite!

 

Excuse me???? Heather feels the need to bring clarity to Bethenny's custody situation?  For whose benefit?  Her own?  For Bethenny?  For the viewers?  

 

Ugh, I want to like Heather but she is making it almost impossible.  

[kassa]

Heather was definitely slagging Sonja with the Kmart comment, just as she would have been slagging her if she asked her on a different day if what she was wearing came from Kmart.  Yes, yes, Kmart is a meaningful entity in the retail clothing world, and no, it would not be shameful to mine that goldfield.  Especially if we were still talking about a toaster oven.  But we're not.  

 

Heather knew exactly what she was doing, and that she could spin any offense taken as naivete about how important Kmart is in the retail industry.  She didn't say Macy's or JC Penney or Kohls -- she said Kmart.  For a reason.  

[Baltimore Betty]

I have a real hatred for the people that start the trouble, stir up sh*t and then tell the hurt person to "let it go."  Ramona does this to everyone on a regular basis and she did to her bestie Dorinda at the caviar dinner.  Dorinda is a much nicer person than me where that nonsense is concerned. 

 

Luanne did look fantastic at that dinner.

 

Sonja should try to work a deal with a company like Cabi.  She does have a good sense of style most of the time, she could sell a less expensive line of clothing to them or even be a sales person (if she wasn't so bat shit crazy). 

[hottesthw]

Maybe it was a boring episode, because I thought the most interesting part of the past hour was Carole talking about how she liked having Adam around and how it felt more comfortable and natural than her last boyfriend of three years. Bethenny quickly asks, "What was it like with your husband?" and Carole says, without missing a beat, "Oh, well, that was perfect" and then the subject was quickly changed/the scene cut away.

See this I don't get....how dare Heather ask about Bethenny and her custody arrangement (which has clearly played a big part in Bs story line thus far) because it's the most real, raw, emotional thing she's gone thru, but Bethenny can just jump in and ask point blank about Carole"s dead husband. Because you know, that's not real and raw and emotional for her. And a few weeks back asked out of the blue about Dorindas dead husband as well. Edited May 28, 2015 by hottesthw

[Bossa Nova]

Yeah, yeah, okay to all the stuff Bethenney could have said to Heather and I guess Heather was trying to be nice. And bond. 

 

Still no, just no, on ....." you gotta fix that".

 

Then Heather's comment about getting a Malificent horns tattoo like Angelina Jolie.  

 

Then asking, no assuming, a sympatico affirming agreement would be forthcoming with her signature scrunchied up nose and wide grin, "....wouldn't that be cool !?"

 

Just no. I agree, Bethenney.

 

My signature move after encountering a Heather at a party? Glance at my watch, " ....well I gotta go now. I'm needed in surgery. "  (I am not a doctor).

Edited May 28, 2015 by Bossa Nova

[Baltimore Betty]

Excuse me???? Heather feels the need to bring clarity to Bethenny's custody situation?  For whose benefit?  Her own?  For Bethenny?  For the viewers?  

 

Ugh, I want to like Heather but she is making it almost impossible.  

Just to chime in here...many years ago while I was getting divorced my dentist's wife/office manager peppered me with (what I thought were very personal) questions about my custody business, halfway thru answering I thought, why does she need to know?  I was polite in stating we share custody then changed the subject...Heather needs to understand somethings are just nunya as in none of your damn business. 

[hottesthw]

Bravo wanted Bethenny badly so they agreed to her conditions, she can't attend events when she has "her" time with her daughter and that is it. Bravo could have said "sorry, that is not how it works, you must be present in all and every event or you can't have this job" but that is not what they did, right? They wanted her badly so they took whatever she could offer. I doubt Bethenny lied to them.

I doubt that Bethenny commited herself to be available to their filming schedule 24/7 and is now just being a "bad worker" by not going to some events, if that was the case she would be fired, Bravo wanted to have her in any capacity they could have her and that is all there is to it. Of course the others are reeling at that and find ways to point that she has been missing events when in reality they have shown Bethenny at almost every single gathering, her absence has not been hugely noticed.

I didn't see anybody making a huge deal out of all the events that Lisa Vanderpump missed the last two seasons, I didn't see anybody complaining that she was getting the good edit because she was allowed to skip more events tham she could attend, she has businesses to run and other show to film for, she has all the money she can possibly need so why even do the show? To showcase her business that is all, same as Bethenny. Bravo could had take her or leave it and they took her. Those are allowances Bravo makes with their HW, not all of them, just certain but this is not a unique situation at all.

Actually if you watch her interview with Andy, Bravo did not woo Bethenny back at all. She called Andy with "an idea" about coming back at the same time Andy was calling her with the same thoughts. She tried to brush it off but Andy repeated it making it clear that Bethenny called him. She may want her fans to think she was sought after as the savior of this dumb show, but Andy was having none of it.

Now her contract, who knows. They didn't make me privy to that information. LOL

Just to chime in here...many years ago while I was getting divorced my dentist's wife/office manager peppered me with (what I thought were very personal) questions about my custody business, halfway thru answering I thought, why does she need to know? I was polite in stating we share custody then changed the subject...Heather needs to understand somethings are just nunya as in none of your damn business.

I agree to a point but not in regard to this show. Her custody has been her reason to do or not do quite a few things. And she's cried about it quite often on camera. I don't think having a fellow castmate ask questions about it (maybe clearing up some of her absences for the viewers) is such an awful thing. That'd be like her getting pissed if someone asks how she felt about her dad now that he's dead.

[shoegal]

Except... if custody has already been settled, the rest is just arguing over money. Which there’s plenty of.  It can all stop as soon as she wants it to stop.  Yes, that might mean “losing.”  I have no idea what the guy is asking for, but even if it’s half, if the turmoil in your daughter’s life is “killing” you... you learn to live on the measly 50-60 million you have left over. 

 

It’s obviously not killing her enough yet that she’s willing to choose peace over winning.

 

And I'm not even saying she HAS to -- I can admire a scorched earth approach as much as the next gal.  But don't whine about your powerlessness while you're doing it.

I think the turmoil or the hard time Bryn is experiencing is the actual divorce, meaning mommy and daddy now live separately and Bryn is a child in limbo being shuttled back and forth between two homes. Bethenny paying Jason off to settle the divorce isn't going to change this. It's not going to bring Bryn any peace.

As far as Bethenny, the idea that she should pay Jason as much as he wants to make him go away feels a little but like 'lay back and take it'. It doesn't sit well with me.

[jaync]

This whole thing about a gag order is very confusing to me.

Yeah, I don't recall Beth saying anything about an order, just the bullshit omg it's the most awful darkest thing ever in my life and I just can't bear ever talking about it to anybody at anytime ever! 

 

They are not to discuss each other in a negative light-which is why many surmise Bethenny did the one sided custody battle so she could get her story out there without violating the order. 

Ah, so that's why she had her therapist and friend do the onscreen potshotting against the ex for her. Pretty slimy.

 

I thought the gag order was that Bethenny is supposed to gag and ultimately puke anytime somebody mentions Pennsylvania, grand parents or nuclear family.

Or complex carbohydrates.

[sasha206]

 

And can I, finally, say one other thing I like about Heather?  For all that Sonja and Bethenny and Ramona have been carrying on about their personal hardships, especially Bethenny, who says pretty much EVERY SINGLE EPISODE that "nobody knows the trouble I've seen," we've got Heather, who is dealing with a real life serious health situation WITH HER CHILD, which is pretty much the most horrible thing I can think of in life, and has never once used that as an excuse for not showing up, for being difficult or nasty, or anything. All she's done is express gratitude for liver transplants, raise money, be thankful for her kid, try to help him, etc.   Hey Bethenny - that's what being tough looks like.  Take notes.  And maybe, JUST ONCE, try to reciprocate just a little bit Heather's offer of friendship, even just to be polite.  

 

AMEN.  

 

Heather can annoy me with the "holla" stuff, but I generally like her approach to life.  She once said, "You gotta keep it going forward" -- in other words, don't get stuck in the past and linger on regrets.  It really resonated with me.

Edited May 28, 2015 by sasha206

[zoeysmom]

Excuse me???? Heather feels the need to bring clarity to Bethenny's custody situation?  For whose benefit?  Her own?  For Bethenny?  For the viewers?  

 

Ugh, I want to like Heather but she is making it almost impossible.  

In defense of Heather-if I were working with someone and working with them depending on whether or not they had their child I think it would be an appropriate thing to do asking what their custody arrangement is at the present time.  There was a scene I believe with Heather and Kristen trying to get together and their children's school schedules didn't jive.  It seemed reasonable.

 

AnnaL's post:

 

Lisa Vanderpump it seems did suffer at the hands of her co-stars Brandi and Yolanda in  particularly the season she abstained from many scenes. Brandi has specifically mentioned Lisa and her absences from the show and scenes. I will never know if it is production driven but I do think these folks tend to believe tales from the line producers with regards to what the other HWs are receiving in terms of perks and scheduling preferences.  Kristen like her BFF Brandi is well aware if you want for your scenes to make it to air hang with the top dog-Lisa Vanderpump for RHOBH scenes and Bethenny this season for RHONYC.  Interesting that Lisa Vanderpump was once one trying to marginalize Kyle's camera time and Bethenny had previously been the victim at Jill's hands of encouraging others to not film with her. 

[Bossa Nova]

I did like the satire on Carole's running for her condo board. She hit all the cliche's. The only thing she missed was a scandal , then calling a press conference to announce that she is stepping down to "spend more time with her family."

 

What do you want to bet that Ramona totally did not get the satire.

Edited May 28, 2015 by Bossa Nova

[Celia Rubenstein]

I am starting to think Heather is just trying to create scenes for herself with these Bethenny conversations.  Like the Luann car thing may have seemed "cute" to her, maybe she thought it would be funny.  Spotlight on witty Heather! Then we get to see compassionate, concerned Heather voicing Kristin's pain on her behalf.   Was the visitation conversation she had to "clarify" things for (I presume) the audience some kind of attempt to demonstrate that she is valuable to the show as some kind of plot expediter or something?  

 

Hmm. I wonder.  Is Heather worried about losing her apple? Is that what this is about? Is she afraid of being ousted now that the big dog is back in the junkyard, so she's sidling up to Bethenny because she wants to secure her future on the show?  Now that I think about it, has she had any of her "own" scenes yet this season, featuring her life, family, work, events?  If it is true that Bethenny's return has sucked up all the oxygen in the room at the expense of certain other housewives, hitching her wagon to Beth's star may not be the dumbest thing in the world.  

 

Unfortunately for Heather, the way she is going about it has been a dismal failure. 

 

In defense of Heather-if I were working with someone and working with them depending on whether or not they had their child I think it would be an appropriate thing to do asking what their custody arrangement is at the present time.  There was a scene I believe with Heather and Kristen trying to get together and their children's school schedules didn't jive.  It seemed reasonable.

 

That would be valid imo, too, but that doesn't seem like what was going on (at least based on what Bravo showed).  It felt more to me like Heather was trying to talk to Beth about her life more than facilitate them working together or getting together.  Which is fine provided you go about it the right way. Telling her she needed to "fix it" was not the right way, lol. 

[Wendy]

And yet Bethenny talks about it (custody) on camera. Which either means your interpretation is wrong, or she's violating the order. Sorry, but it's the former.

 

She does talk about her custody issues in general terms. There is a difference between saying "sorry can't attend your event because this is my weekend with my daughter" that the specific question of "how many nights a week do you spend with your daughter?" .  One is generic, the other is directed to get specific information.

 

Why is Bethenny doing the show? why are the other women doing the show? For exposure, each and everyone of them

 

Why is Heather doing the show? she doesn't show anything about her life so the natural conclusion is that she wants exposure for her products, no shame on that.

Carole wants exposure for her books. They both have a lot of money so this show is not their main source of income. Kristen wants exposure for her husband products. Ramona also has products to hawn and so does Luann and Sonja.

 

Each and everyone of them do this show with one specific purpose in mind and Bethenny is no exception, she wants to showcase her products, IMO there is nothing wrong with that and she has always been upfront with that. There is a very fine line in general when talking about delicate issues like custody, those issues are better discussed with people you have known for a while which is not the case between Heather and Bethenny.

 

Heather is way too smart not to know this, she wants to act like she has concern, great she can play that game, but so far I have seen Heather demand Bethenny to give a car to Luann just for her being there when she first ordered a skinnygirl margarita, she has also made a huge deal out of Kristen not being invited even though it seems Kristen can care less, she has made a big deal about trashtalking Ramona, she has shorten Bethenny's name even after she asked her to called her Bethenny, she made a big deal about her being late even though she told Sonja before hand and it is not her fault if Sonja forgot to mention it. Heather is the one who clearly has an agenda with Bethenny and as a viewer it is obvious to me so I imagine that the same goes on in Bethenny's mind. Much like her I would be asking myself what is this woman's deal? what does she want from me?

 

I might be wrong and Heather is just like this with everyone but unless in the next eposide I see her asking Luann why she didn't invite Carole, Sonja, Kristen and Bethenny to the birthday dinner for Dorinda and how their feelings were hurt, then I have the feelings that Heather just like to point this out to further her agenda and when it is convenient to her, specially when it comes to Bethenny.

[selhars]

Personally, I love Heather's strong personality.

 

I'm surprised The model Kristen (sp) wasn't released. Talk about having nothing to add to the show....which just doesn't need EIGHT women on it. Even if Bethenny hadn' t come back.....I think Kristen could have been let go...especially with them adding Dorinda.

Edited May 28, 2015 by selhars

[archer1267]

Bethenny can just jump in and ask point blank about Carole"s dead husband. Because you know, that's not real and raw and emotional for her. And a few weeks back asked out of the blue about Dorindas dead husband as well.

 

 

Because Bethenny saw it as a re-branding opportunity for the phrase "late husband." And, you know, had to chime in as a marketing expert. 

 

Or, maybe she figured enough time had passed and that the wound was no longer fresh for either woman.

[mostlylurking]

 

I think John just has resting perv face.

This is the best thing I've read all day!  Completely accurate!

[Mozelle]

Hmm. I wonder.  Is Heather worried about losing her apple? Is that what this is about? Is she afraid of being ousted now that the big dog is back in the junkyard, so she's sidling up to Bethenny because she wants to secure her future on the show?  Now that I think about it, has she had any of her "own" scenes yet this season, featuring her life, family, work, events?  If it is true that Bethenny's return has sucked up all the oxygen in the room at the expense of certain other housewives, hitching her wagon to Beth's star may not be the dumbest thing in the world.  

 

Unfortunately for Heather, the way she is going about it has been a dismal failure. 

 

But if Heather filmed her scenes, initiated gathering, was present and all that stuff, but they aren't airing it now, I don't see how it can be said that Heather is afraid to lose her apple so that's why she was asking Bethenny about a topic that Bethenny more than likely brought up. During filming, Heather has no control over what the producers and editors will decide to show once the season airs. 

[imjagain]

AMEN.

Heather can annoy me with the "holla" stuff, but I generally like her approach to life. She once said, "You gotta keep it going forward" -- in other words, don't get stuck in the past and linger on regrets. It really resonated with me.

This is one of the things I like about Heather too.

You don't always get a choice of what life hands you, but it's definitely your choice on how you handle it.

I am usually a very empathetic person, but something about how Beth embraces being the victim rubs me the wrong way. I do feel bad for her little girl, I guess that is why I don't understand why Beth joined the show. If navigating her schedule is so difficult, with the show, her daughter and everything else skinny girl must require, why join a reality show? It makes no sense to me.

Edited May 28, 2015 by imjagain

[WireWrap]

I am starting to think Heather is just trying to create scenes for herself with these Bethenny conversations.  Like the Luann car thing may have seemed "cute" to her, maybe she thought it would be funny.  Spotlight on witty Heather! Then we get to see compassionate, concerned Heather voicing Kristin's pain on her behalf.   Was the visitation conversation she had to "clarify" things for (I presume) the audience some kind of attempt to demonstrate that she is valuable to the show as some kind of plot expediter or something?  

 

Hmm. I wonder.  Is Heather worried about losing her apple? Is that what this is about? Is she afraid of being ousted now that the big dog is back in the junkyard, so she's sidling up to Bethenny because she wants to secure her future on the show?  Now that I think about it, has she had any of her "own" scenes yet this season, featuring her life, family, work, events?  If it is true that Bethenny's return has sucked up all the oxygen in the room at the expense of certain other housewives, hitching her wagon to Beth's star may not be the dumbest thing in the world.  

 

Unfortunately for Heather, the way she is going about it has been a dismal failure. 

 

 

That would be valid imo, too, but that doesn't seem like what was going on (at least based on what Bravo showed).  It felt more to me like Heather was trying to talk to Beth about her life more than facilitate them working together or getting together.  Which is fine provided you go about it the right way. Telling her she needed to "fix it" was not the right way, lol. 

There was no way for any HW to know what will or will not make it past the editing. Nor would any HW worry about loosing their "apple" until after the editing is done, LuAnn had no idea that she was downgraded until after filming was over.

 

There was more to that conversation between Heather/Bethenny that "fix it" but for some reason, you seem to focus that on those 2 words even though her sentence before that explains why she said it. The way you state it, it makes it sound like that was all Heather said when that is not what really happened.

[sasha206]

This is one of the things I like about Heather too.

You don't always get a choice of what life hands you, but it's definitely your choice on how you handle it.

I am usually a very empathetic person, but something about how Beth embraces being the victim rubs me the wrong way. I do feel bad for her little girl, I guess that is why I don't understand why Beth joined the show. If navigating her schedule is so difficult, with the show, her daughter and everything else skinny girl must require, why join a reality show? It makes no sense to me.

 

I completely agree.  

 

I think Bethenney is a really smart woman who had a shitty childhood.  But I feel like she's leading with her shitty childhood, shitty divorce.  She strikes me as someone who is only happy if they are miserable.  

[WireWrap]

This is one of the things I like about Heather too.

You don't always get a choice of what life hands you, but it's definitely your choice on how you handle it.

I am usually a very empathetic person, but something about how Beth embraces being the victim rubs me the wrong way. I do feel bad for her little girl, I guess that is why I don't understand why Beth joined the show. If navigating her schedule is so difficult, with the show, her daughter and everything else skinny girl must require, why join a reality show? It makes no sense to me.

Part of the problem for me with Bethenny is that we have heard this story about her childhood for years and years now, so much so it has become a mantra for her. By her own words, she has not sought help to deal with her past/pain unless it is for the show, on camera, which means it is not real help and that she has no interest in getting help because she doesn't feel she really needs it. She needs to stop using it as part of her storyline and as an excuse for her caustic behavior towards others.

 

I agree, if juggling her schedule is so difficult and her time with her daughter so important, then why cut into that time by being on the show? Why risk it, is money/fame more important to Bethenny than peace of mind and ease of having enough time for Bryn?

[archer1267]

Why risk it, is money/fame more important to Bethenny than peace of mind and ease of having enough time for Bryn?

 

 

I think Bethenny answered this herself in one of the first few episodes, when she said "you can build a really good brand…or the brand of a lifetime." Implying that SkinnyGirl will be that "brand of a lifetime" for her. Maybe she's got a plan and only plans on doing this for a certain amount of time before retiring, but she's making hay as long as she's got some momentum and some name recognition. If she said "I'm going to take some time off until Bryn is in first grade [or whatever]," she'd be forgotten by the time she came back from her hiatus. (I doubt anyone's really waiting for Teresa Giudice's next cookbook.)

 

I'm not a psychologist by any stretch, but I wonder if Bethenny's worried that if she stops, she's going to start having more time to think…and self-reflect…and descend into a self-hate spiral. That's one thing that happens when you start having a lot more time on your hands - you start staying in your own head, and for some people, that's an uncomfortable thing. I was stunned at the way Bethenny bit off the shrink's head. She's carrying a lot of stuff around, always has, and working is probably her therapy in that it keeps her from going to a scary place.

 

[One Tough Cookie]

Ramona is just an asshole. I don't really care what led up to what and who escalated what. What pisses me off and makes me strongly dislike Ramona is that old runtelldat shit she pulled where she herself was talking much shit about John but than goes to Dorinda and acts like she was just an innocent bystander whose ears were offended by the things Luann spewed about her so-called dear friends man. That to me is one of the worst violations ever! That is why I can't with Ramona's nasty petty ass and why I can never find fault with Luann going in on her ass after all the nasty shit Ramona has said and done to her re: her marriage and kids. Glad that Dorinda saw right thru her.

 

 

 

Ramoaner is, was and will ALWAYS be a miserable bitch. I have NO PITY for the woman.  I don't know how Mario put up with with her as long as he did and can totally understand his wandering eye.

[LotusFlower]

She does talk about her custody issues in general terms. There is a difference between saying "sorry can't attend your event because this is my weekend with my daughter" that the specific question of "how many nights a week do you spend with your daughter?" .  One is generic, the other is directed to get specific information.

If there was a real gag order in place and spending time with Bryn was so important to Bethenny, do you really think she'd split hairs like this? The subject would be OFF LIMITS! (TM Kim Richards). Forget Heather - Bethenny herself has talked about it in ways that would make any judge raise an eyebrow.

[jaync]

Heather is way too smart not to know this, she wants to act like she has concern, great she can play that game, but so far I have seen Heather demand Bethenny to give a car to Luann just for her being there when she first ordered a skinnygirl margarita, she has also made a huge deal out of Kristen not being invited even though it seems Kristen can care less, she has made a big deal about trashtalking Ramona, she has shorten Bethenny's name even after she asked her to called her Bethenny, she made a big deal about her being late even though she told Sonja before hand and it is not her fault if Sonja forgot to mention it.

This is a good example of mileage varying, because I don't recall any of the bolded happening.

 

Because Bethenny saw it as a re-branding opportunity for the phrase "late husband."

What was so dumb about it was her reasoning that the phrase made the widow sound old. Given that, and how she equated being called "mama" to being old, it seems Beth has aging hang-ups to go along with her weight ones.

[Celia Rubenstein]

But if Heather filmed her scenes, initiated gathering, was present and all that stuff, but they aren't airing it now, I don't see how it can be said that Heather is afraid to lose her apple so that's why she was asking Bethenny about a topic that Bethenny more than likely brought up. During filming, Heather has no control over what the producers and editors will decide to show once the season airs. 

 

 

There was no way for any HW to know what will or will not make it past the editing. Nor would any HW worry about loosing their "apple" until after the editing is done, LuAnn had no idea that she was downgraded until after filming was over.

 

I didn't mean that Heather knew her scenes would be cut and that is why she was worried about her apple.  Of course she couldn't know about her lack of scenes until she show started to air. I mentioned her lack of scenes as evidence that it turns out any fear she may have had about losing her apple due to Bethenny's return may have actually been well-founded, since as it turns out so little of Heather's life is being shown.  

 

I have posted before that I consider Heather to have been cast as Bethenny's replacement, and that she might be worried about what Bethenny's return meant for her.  That is what I was alluding to with the comment about the big dog returning to the junk yard.  Bethenny's presence is what I think might give Heather pause, not her scenes being cut which she could not have known about.

 

There was more to that conversation between Heather/Bethenny that "fix it" but for some reason, you seem to focus that on those 2 words even though her sentence before that explains why she said it. The way you state it, it makes it sound like that was all Heather said when that is not what really happened.

 

I found the "fix it" part especially ignorant and insensitive and pushy of Heather to say.  That is why I focus on it more than the rest.  And I don't agree that what went before in the conversation justifies her saying that at all.  I don't think Bethenny brought up anything to cause Heather to get into specifics about visitation, much less entitle her to critique the situation.  

[breezy424]

The 'conflict' between Heather and Beth is being made a big deal because Beth is 'making' it a big deal.  Heather mentions to Beth that Kristen was hurt because she wasn't invited to the b day party.  Beth makes a big deal out of it.  Heather makes a joke about owing Lu a car.  Beth makes a big deal out of it.  Heather responds to something Beth says about her custody.  So you only get six days - well that's gotta be fixed.  Beth responds no and explains.  So you can't pick up your child from school if you want.  That's shitty.  Beth responds some more.  Then she goes all attitude in her TH.  If Beth doesn't want to talk about it then why didn't she say that to Heather?  For me, the only reason why any of this is getting viewer reaction is because of how Beth is reacting.

 

And then we have the snarky response from Beth regarding Heather being on the shark tank type show. 

 

The interesting thing about this is that for whatever reason, Beth came into this with an attitude toward Heather.  And as some have posted, Heather has and is facing serious medical problems with her son but has handled it admirably.  She's also built a successful business on her own without Bravo exposure.  I think Beth came into this a bit intimidated by Heather.  Heather may not have anywhere near the amount of money that Beth has made but she does have what Beth wanted - her own successful business, children and what seems to be a great guy and marriage.  And Beth relates to this more with Heather because I think they're around the same age.

[Radar]

 

Bravo did not woo Bethenny back at all. She called Andy with "an idea" about coming back at the same time Andy was calling her with the same thoughts. She tried to brush it off but Andy repeated it making it clear that Bethenny called him. She may want her fans to think she was sought after as the savior of this dumb show, but Andy was having none of it.

True. In Andy's last book he mentions that Bethenny came in for a meeting with him to pitch, Bethenny Starting Over. He did not go for this idea though and instead brought up the idea of her returning to the housewives. Yet, with all the focus on Bethenny and her issues this season we are getting tons of scenes that could easily have been footage for her spinoff idea. 

[LotusFlower]

 

I found the "fix it" part especially ignorant and insensitive and pushy of Heather to say.  That is why I focus on it more than the rest.  And I don't agree that what went before in the conversation justifies her saying that at all.  I don't think Bethenny brought up anything to cause Heather to get into specifics about visitation, much less entitle her to critique the situation.

Then Bethenny needs to take a good long look at herself in a mirror and realize this is how she talks to people. If she finds inquisitive questions and unsolicited advice so offensive or rude, then maybe she can curtail her own behavior first.

[Lucelu]

Bethanny at the therapists.. "Boring, this conversation bores me... I'm falling asleep now. I'm sleeping now....."

I really am sick of hearing about her crazy life, horrible divorce and poor child. It's like hearing Sonja's ex complaining about his insane delusional wife who thinks she's a filmmaker and he's divorcing her and she wants more money. Boofuckinghoo. Doesn't their daughter attend boarding school?

Couples get divorced all the time. My parents got divorced when I was young. In the 70's, divorce was very nasty and kids were put into poverty. Bryn is a privileged little girl who just happens to live with each parent half the time, just like at least 50% of the children in her household income bracket in NYC. She's lucky both parents stay in town and actually spend time with her instead of leaving her with the nanny all the time while they jet set around making their business deals and vacationing.

Bethany can end it any time by just agreeing with his demands. So she might have to sell one of her houses of which she inexplicably cannot live in. I know a gal who was building a house and she had sold her old one, was staying with her kids at her mother in laws while the house was getting finished and had to pay her husband child support because she did not have a permanent address yet. She could have rented an apartment but nope.

Also, many of us had crappy sometimes violent childhoods punctuated by alcoholism and drug use yet still manage to have successful relationships, stable marriages and raise well adjusted kids.

Of course, we don't attempt to sign on to every reality show we hear about either.

Heather in her most obnoxious scenes does not hold a candle to Bethanny being Bethanny being a rude dickhead. For example... she doesn't put her hands to her ears and yell to the person in front of her saying "I can't hear this anymore. You are making my brain hurt, I'm out of here."

Speaking of which I am so sick of Bethanny on this show. For one thing, I'd like to know Dorinda better, she seems like an intelligent, well rounded individual who has social skills. I'd like to see Jake and see how he is doing as well as his sister, and Kristen's kids too. Can't Heather and Kristin get a scene where they are on a kid/family outing like normal women with kids? Dorinda hasn't met their families either. Sonja is a train wreck and really not that interesting. I think she is mentally ill and Ramona needs to not mix her valium with her Pinot because it makes her evil.

I think Kmart could have been a dig but I think that is payback for the Lady Morgan forcing her out in the freezing wet cold with the horrible construction and their luggage. That was a personal and very rude and the opposite of gracious hostess behavior.

I normally don't like to remark on appearances but Bethanny's nose is really distracting.

[LotusFlower]

And then we have the snarky response from Beth regarding Heather being on the shark tank type show.

This was so revealing. Jealousy - table for one! The show sounded exactly up Bethenny's alley, as she clearly sees herself as a successful and famous entrepreneur/business mogul, and yet Heather got the gig, not her, so she had to make fun of it. Not only that, but she quickly changed the subject. I think that she's so accustomed to being the star, that someone else's success seems to steal her spotlight, or threatens her.

[WireWrap]

I think Bethenny answered this herself in one of the first few episodes, when she said "you can build a really good brand…or the brand of a lifetime." Implying that SkinnyGirl will be that "brand of a lifetime" for her. Maybe she's got a plan and only plans on doing this for a certain amount of time before retiring, but she's making hay as long as she's got some momentum and some name recognition. If she said "I'm going to take some time off until Bryn is in first grade [or whatever]," she'd be forgotten by the time she came back from her hiatus. (I doubt anyone's really waiting for Teresa Giudice's next cookbook.)

 

I'm not a psychologist by any stretch, but I wonder if Bethenny's worried that if she stops, she's going to start having more time to think…and self-reflect…and descend into a self-hate spiral. That's one thing that happens when you start having a lot more time on your hands - you start staying in your own head, and for some people, that's an uncomfortable thing. I was stunned at the way Bethenny bit off the shrink's head. She's carrying a lot of stuff around, always has, and working is probably her therapy in that it keeps her from going to a scary place.

So, in other words, even though Bethenny boo hoos about not having enough time with Bryn, she is really more concerned about fading from the public view? Seriously though, postponing her return to "reality" TV until Bryn has had a chance to adjust to her new lifestyle would have reflected better on Bethenny that what we are seeing now. Saying 1 thing then doing the opposite tends to bite the person when they least expect it, IMO, Bethenny is experiencing that first hand now.

I didn't mean that Heather knew her scenes would be cut and that is why she was worried about her apple.  Of course she couldn't know about her lack of scenes until she show started to air. I mentioned her lack of scenes as evidence that it turns out any fear she may have had about losing her apple due to Bethenny's return may have actually been well-founded, since as it turns out so little of Heather's life is being shown.  

 

I have posted before that I consider Heather to have been cast as Bethenny's replacement, and that she might be worried about what Bethenny's return meant for her.  That is what I was alluding to with the comment about the big dog returning to the junk yard.  Bethenny's presence is what I think might give Heather pause, not her scenes being cut which she could not have known about.

 

 

I found the "fix it" part especially ignorant and insensitive and pushy of Heather to say.  That is why I focus on it more than the rest.  And I don't agree that what went before in the conversation justifies her saying that at all.  I don't think Bethenny brought up anything to cause Heather to get into specifics about visitation, much less entitle her to critique the situation.  

But you are taking "fix it" out of context and changing why she said it. You are making it a stand alone comment when it was no such thing.

[shoegal]

The 'conflict' between Heather and Beth is being made a big deal because Beth is 'making' it a big deal.  Heather mentions to Beth that Kristen was hurt because she wasn't invited to the b day party.  Beth makes a big deal out of it.  Heather makes a joke about owing Lu a car.  Beth makes a big deal out of it.  Heather responds to something Beth says about her custody.  So you only get six days - well that's gotta be fixed.  Beth responds no and explains.  So you can't pick up your child from school if you want.  That's shitty.  Beth responds some more.  Then she goes all attitude in her TH.  If Beth doesn't want to talk about it then why didn't she say that to Heather?  For me, the only reason why any of this is getting viewer reaction is because of how Beth is reacting.

 

And then we have the snarky response from Beth regarding Heather being on the shark tank type show. 

 

The interesting thing about this is that for whatever reason, Beth came into this with an attitude toward Heather.  And as some have posted, Heather has and is facing serious medical problems with her son but has handled it admirably.  She's also built a successful business on her own without Bravo exposure.  I think Beth came into this a bit intimidated by Heather.  Heather may not have anywhere near the amount of money that Beth has made but she does have what Beth wanted - her own successful business, children and what seems to be a great guy and marriage.  And Beth relates to this more with Heather because I think they're around the same age.

Didn't Heather call Bethenny a bitch in one of her TH's?

I don't think this is all on Bethenny, or Bethenny is being horrible to Heather specifically. I think neither really likes the other, and that's OK.

[Otherkate]

 

But you are taking "fix it" out of context and changing why she said it. You are making it a stand alone comment when it was no such thing.

 

That was the way I heard it too. It stuck out so much to me that I couldn't hear anything else. 

 

 

I don't think this is all on Bethenny, or Bethenny is being horrible to Heather specifically. I think neither really likes the other, and that's OK.

 

Agreed. And when you don't like someone, you tend to respond very differently to the things they say/do than you would if someone you liked said or did the exact same thing. It's human nature. I don't think Bethenny likes Heather and that's just fine. She doesn't have to. It actually feels more organic to me than all these BS "friendships" we see on the Housewives shows. 

 

 

The show sounded exactly up Bethenny's alley, as she clearly sees herself as a successful and famous entrepreneur/business mogul, and yet Heather got the gig, not her, so she had to make fun of it.

 

Agreed, ugh. Bethenny's response to Heather's Shark Tankesque show story was so obnoxious.

[selhars]

I think Kmart could have been a dig but I think that is payback for the Lady Morgan forcing her out in the freezing wet cold with the horrible construction and their luggage. That was a personal and very rude and the opposite of gracious hostess behavior.

 

Of course the "Kmart" mention was a dig. Of all the stores Heather could have said -- especially at their socio-economic shoppin level .....Nordstrom, Neiman Marcus, Bloomies, Barneys, Heni Bendel ..... I find it very interesting, if not telling, that she mentioned Kmart. I mean really...Kmart? And then she tries to clean it up in her talking head saying how major, reputable and national a retailer Kmart is. Is HER stuff sold at Kmart? I love you Heather, but come on. That dig was slick. I'll give you that. Rolled off your tongue so innocently....

Edited May 28, 2015 by selhars

[Celia Rubenstein]

But you are taking "fix it" out of context and changing why she said it. You are making it a stand alone comment when it was no such thing.

 

No, I think the problem is that we don't agree on the context in which the "fix it" remark was made.  I see it as obnoxious and unwarranted and you think it wasn't.  We'll have to agree to disagree about it, I suppose.  

Edited May 28, 2015 by Celia Rubenstein

[Leroux]

Hey Bethenny - that's what being tough looks like.  Take notes.  And maybe, JUST ONCE, try to reciprocate just a little bit Heather's offer of friendship, even just to be polite.  

 

Heather's offering of friendship is the weirdest thing to me. But maybe that is just who Heather is

 

Maybe she gets nervious around Bethenny but the scenes that I have seen from Heather are not those directed to someone wanted to become your friend.

-The jab about giving Luann a car (none of her business)

-The long talking about Ramona's sheenanigans (none of Bethenny's business)

-The information about Kristen's hurt feelings (none of her business)

- The issue she took about Bethenny arriving late when Bethenny did bother to inform the host of the event (Sonja) that she will be arriving late.

- The shorten of Bethenny's name even after Bethenny has told her that she prefers to be called her full name

-The issue of teh nagging questions that only a dear friend should ask.

 

Heather has a child with healtcare issues so the question could also be why did she bothered to do the show when she has so much on her plate? because she needs the promotional opportunities for her brand. In this sense Heather is no different from Bethenny, the difference to me is who is real and who is fake.

 

IMO Heather is fakely crafting a story line of issues with Bethenny were she pushes and prods and then when Bethenny reacts then Heather acts hurt and surprised. Very different from Dorinda who is giving us her personal story and who doesn't make a big deal out of stupid things because she doesn't need to. Bethenny called Dorinda and apologized for not being able to go to her house and Dorinda reacted like a normal person, she didn't go off about how hurt she was that Bethenny was not coming, she understood perfectly because the reason was perfectly understandable.

 

Dorinda is not going around trying to push her way into a new friendship with Bethenny as part of her story line, she has her own story line and I am enjoying seeing her real issues. Heather so far has given me nothing except the fact that she likes to focus on other people's problems as her storyline, (pretty much ala Kenya Moore) , if you are going to go onto reality TV show us your real life, your problems. What we have seen so far of Heather is her issues with Sonja, her issues with Bethenny, her love for Carol, her defense of Kristen, nothing about her at all. It makes me wonder if Heather has anything real to offer this season, just from her and not related to any of her castmates.

[breezy424]

No one said 'Fix it'.  What Heather said was a response to something Beth said about visitation that we didn't see or hear.  Heather said so what is the visitation?  So six days you don't get to see her?  That's not fair.  You gotta fix that.  Then Beth said no and explained.  I don't find that obnoxious and unwarranted. 

[LotusFlower]

Of course the "Kmart" mention was a dig. Of all the stores Heather could have said -- especially at their socio-economic shoppin level .....Nordstrom, Neiman Marcus, Bloomies, Barneys, Heni Bendel ..... I find it very interesting, if not telling, that she mentioned Kmart. I mean really...Kmart?

Yes, because after Prada, Armani, Calvin Klein, Karl Lagerfeld, Versace, I'm thinking: Sonja Morgan.

Heather was the creative director behind J. Lo's couture line, and even that didn't make the cut at high-end stores. Celebrity lines, ie. the Kardashians, Jaclyn Smith, Kathy Ireland, etc. are sold at stores like - you guessed it - K-Mart. Heather was (and is still is) in the business - she knows this.

[jennylauren123]

OK, I know this is silly but can someone tell me exactly what Carole's Trader Joe item was.  There is a pretty new one here in Orlando and I want to get one,lol

Hi Jenny (from another Jenny): they are called Parmesan Pups, and they are as delicious as the ladies were saying. I dip them in horseradish mustard. Yummy.

[Celia Rubenstein]

Heather's offering of friendship is the weirdest thing to me. But maybe that is just who Heather is

 

Maybe she gets nervious around Bethenny but the scenes that I have seen from Heather are not those directed to someone wanted to become your friend.

-The jab about giving Luann a car (none of her business)

-The long talking about Ramona's sheenanigans (none of Bethenny's business)

-The information about Kristen's hurt feelings (none of her business)

- The issue she took about Bethenny arriving late when Bethenny did bother to inform the host of the event (Sonja) that she will be arriving late.

- The shorten of Bethenny's name even after Bethenny has told her that she prefers to be called her full name

-The issue of teh nagging questions that only a dear friend should ask.

 

Heather has a child with healtcare issues so the question could also be why did she bothered to do the show when she has so much on her plate? because she needs the promotional opportunities for her brand. In this sense Heather is no different from Bethenny, the difference to me is who is real and who is fake.

 

IMO Heather is fakely crafting a story line of issues with Bethenny were she pushes and prods and then when Bethenny reacts then Heather acts hurt and surprised. Very different from Dorinda who is giving us her personal story and who doesn't make a big deal out of stupid things because she doesn't need to. Bethenny called Dorinda and apologized for not being able to go to her house and Dorinda reacted like a normal person, she didn't go off about how hurt she was that Bethenny was not coming, she understood perfectly because the reason was perfectly understandable.

 

Dorinda is not going around trying to push her way into a new friendship with Bethenny as part of her story line, she has her own story line and I am enjoying seeing her real issues. Heather so far has given me nothing except the fact that she likes to focus on other people's problems as her storyline, (pretty much ala Kenya Moore) , if you are going to go onto reality TV show us your real life, your problems. What we have seen so far of Heather is her issues with Sonja, her issues with Bethenny, her love for Carol, her defense of Kristen, nothing about her at all. It makes me wonder if Heather has anything real to offer this season, just from her and not related to any of her castmates.

 

That is an outstanding summation of the Heather issue, Leroux.  You win the internet again today  Congratulations!  I especially like your comparison of Heather's behavior to Dorinda.  Dorinda is satisfied with sharing her own story and doesn't need to interject herself into situations that are none of her business.  For a newbie, she is hitting all the right notes.  

 

 

 

No one said 'Fix it'.  What Heather said was a response to something Beth said about visitation that we didn't see or hear.  Heather said so what is the visitation?  So six days you don't get to see her?  That's not fair.  You gotta fix that.  Then Beth said no and explained.  I don't find that obnoxious and unwarranted. 

 

I would never presume to tell another mother, especially one I barely know, that she needs to "fix" anything with regard to something as personal as her child custody situation.  But that's just me and my own personal standards. I realize others may not feel the same way and I am completely at peace with that. 

 

I do have to "LOL" at the idea of splitting hairs between whether Heather said "fix it" or "fix that."  Is there really that big of a difference?  

Edited May 28, 2015 by Celia Rubenstein

[LotusFlower]

I would never presume to tell another mother, especially one I barely know, that she needs to "fix" anything with regard to something as personal as her child custody situation.  But that's just me and my own personal standards. I realize others may not feel the same way and I am completely at peace with that.

I love how Heather tries to help people. I guess it matches my own personal standards. I realize that others aren't like that, but maybe I can get at peace with that. To quote most every HoWife: life's a journey....

[Trooper York]

I don't know. I think when most of the woman looked at Mario they told Ramona to fix it.

 

Or did they tell her to have him fixed?

 

Think of all the trouble she could have avoided if she had just listened.

[breezy424]

I have posted before that I consider Heather to have been cast as Bethenny's replacement, and that she might be worried about what Bethenny's return meant for her.  That is what I was alluding to with the comment about the big dog returning to the junk yard.  Bethenny's presence is what I think might give Heather pause, not her scenes being cut which she could not have known about.

 

When Beth was on RHNY the first time, she was a single, financially struggling woman.  That is the exact opposite of Heather Thomson.  If anyone was brought on to 'replace' Beth, it would have been Carole since she and Heather joined the show at the same time.  I'm not saying that Carole is exactly like Beth - far from it.  But at least they have the single, no kids aspect in common. 

 

The dynamic of Beth changed when she got Bethenny Ever After.  And one can see that all the changes that Beth went through those years, also now changes her dynamic on RHNY.  And IMO, it's failing.

[Celia Rubenstein]

When Beth was on RHNY the first time, she was a single, financially struggling woman.  That is the exact opposite of Heather Thomson.  If anyone was brought on to 'replace' Beth, it would have been Carole since she and Heather joined the show at the same time.  I'm not saying that Carole is exactly like Beth - far from it.  But at least they have the single, no kids aspect in common. 

 

I don't mean they have similar life histories.  I think they have very similar personalities.  Both self-made alpha females who tell it like it is, foul mouthed with a take no shit from anybody type attitude.  

[breezy424]

That is an outstanding summation of the Heather issue, Leroux.  You win the internet again today  Congratulations!  I especially like your comparison of Heather's behavior to Dorinda.  Dorinda is satisfied with sharing her own story and doesn't need to interject herself into situations that are none of her business.  For a newbie, she is hitting all the right notes.  

 

 

 

 

I would never presume to tell another mother, especially one I barely know, that she needs to "fix" anything with regard to something as personal as her child custody situation.  But that's just me and my own personal standards. I realize others may not feel the same way and I am completely at peace with that. 

 

I do have to "LOL" at the idea of splitting hairs between whether Heather said "fix it" or "fix that."  Is there really that big of a difference?  

I wouldn't say Heather barely knows Beth.  They spent a weekend in AC together plus that long ride down.  They've spent time together in the Hamptons and they've been to events together.  Obviously, Beth said something about having Bryn six days which prompted Heather's response.  So if something is that personal, why is Beth participating in the conversation to begin with?  There's a lot more on the cutting room floor than what we see in an episode.

 

Not splitting hairs.  There's a difference between someone saying, "Fix it"  and someone saying, "That's unfair.  You gotta fix that." 

[WireWrap]

Oops, idk what happened with my post

Anyway, I agree with the people who said that Heather was right in asking Sonja about K-Mart, although the timing was bad. Low-mid level retailers may not get that much respect, but it's where celebs like Martha Stewarat and the Olsen twins have made their fortunes. Not everyone can start at Bergdorf's!

 

Aside, there is a great documentary called Scatter My Ashes at Bergdorf's about how carefully curated their store selection is. Tommy Hilfiger's daughter is shown in one scene trying to get them to sell their clothing line but she and her partner ultimately failed.

It looks like KMart tweeted Sonja! LOL https://twitter.com/SonjatMorgan/status/603392246789070849

 

I don't mean they have similar life histories.  I think they have very similar personalities.  Both self-made alpha females who tell it like it is, foul mouthed with a take no shit from anybody type attitude.  

When Bethenny left the show she was not the "self made alpha female" on the show. That did not happen until she had her show.