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Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"


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Your Pet Peeves are your Pet Peeves and you're welcome to express them here. However, that does not mean that you can use this topic to go after your fellow posters; being annoyed by something they say or do is not a Pet Peeve.

If there's something you need clarification on, please remember: it's always best to address a fellow poster directly; don't talk about what they said, talk to them. Politely, of course! Everyone is entitled to their opinion and should be treated with respect. (If need be, check out the how to have healthy debates guidelines for more).

While we're happy to grant the leniency that was requested about allowing discussions to go beyond Pet Peeves, please keep in mind that this is still the Pet Peeves topic. Non-pet peeves discussions should be kept brief, be related to a pet peeve and if a fellow poster suggests the discussion may be taken to Chit Chat or otherwise tries to course-correct the topic, we ask that you don't dismiss them. They may have a point.

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Lots of therapy, haha! And so much less “schticky” now. I’ve always loved him but Current Me would probably not be entertained by Way-Back-When Howard, even though Way-Back-Then Me was — if that makes sense. I think I love him now more than ever.

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3 hours ago, TattleTeeny said:

For what it’s worth — probably nothing really, as it’s just an opinion, Howard is a an awesome person. People with a similar mindsets to that of Andrew Tate probably hate Howard. 

I was just trying to think of someone who had the same access to people nationwide, or worldwide. Like before the internet. Talk radio was the one thing I could think of, aside from talk shows that went international, like Oprah's. 

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4 hours ago, TattleTeeny said:

Lots of therapy, haha! And so much less “schticky” now. I’ve always loved him but Current Me would probably not be entertained by Way-Back-When Howard, even though Way-Back-Then Me was — if that makes sense. I think I love him now more than ever.

It makes complte sense to me. 2023 me cringes at the things 1990s and early 2000s me liked, supported and found acceptable. I guess this is growing up. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to Old Navy to shop their new "jeans and a going out top" collection. It's seriously a category on their site.

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11 hours ago, isalicat said:

I've never been on a cruise before and now I have a peeve: Cruises seem to be popularly perceived as rowdy, eat-all-you-can, drink-all-you-can, pollute the ocean, -athons. And maybe some are, but Princess at least takes a lot of trouble to be as "green" as possible (and you avoid taking a jet so there is that "carbon offset") and although there were a number of children on board, there was total civility at all times. I had not gone before because of the bad stuff I had read, but now I'm thinking about another one, very soon!

My husband was bugging me for years to go on a cruise but my impression of cruises was of young women running around in bikinis, too much drinking, too much partying, etc. We finally went on a cruise to Alaska on Holland-America in 2011. It was great! HA ships look like ships (not like horizontal hotels). Very good food, entertainment. And best of all for me? Cooking classes (I think HA is the only cruise line that offers this). We went in May & the weather was perfect in AK. We've since cruised on Princess to NE, the Baltic Sea capitals, and the Caribbean. 

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Peeve:  people who don't RSVP even after following up many times.  My son's birthday party is coming up and so far, nearly every child is coming.  But there's one family I'm having trouble getting a hold of, even after several emails/messages (through the invitation as well as the school's parent portal).  I'm considering asking the teacher, but that sounds really weird.  Right now, I'm assuming they're a yes (and it really doesn't matter, since our birthday package will have enough refreshments).  I asked my parents for advice, and they think it might be a cultural issue (I believe the parents are new to Canada, from China).  They might feel like they'd lose face if they came and had trouble communicating due to language challenges.  But in that case, why don't they just say no?  I didn't just say RSVP, I said "please let us know."  

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4 hours ago, PRgal said:

Right now, I'm assuming they're a yes

If I don't hear from someone, I assume they're not coming (and they're inconsiderate for not responding), but I know you're supposed to plan for extra guests at parties because it's common for people who didn't respond to turn up anyway, so your assumption is more likely to be accurate.

Edited by Bastet
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13 minutes ago, Bastet said:

I assume if I don't hear from someone they're not coming (and they're inconsiderate for not responding), but I know you're supposed to plan for extra guests at parties because it's  common for people who didn't respond to turn up anyway, so your assumption is more likely to be accurate.

If it's a language issue, I'm wondering why they're not asking another parent who speaks the language.  There are several parents who do.  Or do you think it's the fear of losing face?

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On 10/3/2023 at 6:12 AM, Cloud9Shopper said:

I’m going on a cruise by myself next year. It’s so worth it to me (I also went on a solo cruise before COVID) to have a week alone without the demands of work and getting to do what I want when I want. Not to mention solo cruising has gotten more popular in recent years and plenty of women (and some men, I’m sure) do it. There’s too much to do on a cruise anyway to dwell on how you’re by yourself.

I understand why finding a partner is a big deal for some people but I still feel like we make weddings out to be a way bigger event than the marriage itself. It’s all become a day to see how many social media trends you can fit in to show off on Facebook, and how much you can flaunt your ring and remind everyone that you’re married afterwards. I remember a friend of mine got married a few years ago and posted 200+ photos on Facebook, and I just remember thinking “in 10 years are you really going to look at the picture of the church organist’s back or the champagne glasses at the reception? Or the stairs at your venue?” 

I’ve been looking online for the last 6 months thinking about a cruise or travel by myself. I’ve only been on the 4 night Mexico cruise years ago with my late husband and enjoyed it. Do you mind telling me what kind or destination you went on? My two best friends who are long time married gay males kinda led me to believe we’d do a trip when one got an inheritance in November but they haven’t said anything since so I’m thinking they’ve rethought it. I might add they are going on a weekend getaway in a couple of weeks. I’m put off and hurt when I think how I’ve treated them to a coastal getaway, always  driven my car on day trips dinners treated birthday dinners etc now don’t think I’m even in the picture now they have  new car .  
I’m in desperate need of a trip

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10 minutes ago, athousandclowns said:

I’ve been looking online for the last 6 months thinking about a cruise or travel by myself. I’ve only been on the 4 night Mexico cruise years ago with my late husband and enjoyed it. Do you mind telling me what kind or destination you went on? My two best friends who are long time married gay males kinda led me to believe we’d do a trip when one got an inheritance in November but they haven’t said anything since so I’m thinking they’ve rethought it. I might add they are going on a weekend getaway in a couple of weeks. I’m put off and hurt when I think how I’ve treated them to a coastal getaway, always  driven my car on day trips dinners treated birthday dinners etc now don’t think I’m even in the picture now they have  new car .  
I’m in desperate need of a trip

I am not who you were asking, but now that I've been, I would not hesitate to go on a cruise by myself (you are super secure in your cabin and there are always lots and lots of staff around) to almost anywhere on Princess. They had a nightly gathering for all the singles on board (and I don't get the impression it was to provide "hook up" opportunities, so not to worry there) and overall every time I sat down with a glass of wine or a cup of tea in one of the many cafe areas, there was a friendly person or couple nearby who was happy to get acquainted. Plus if you go to Hawaii, there are lei making classes and hula classes and ukelele classes so there were many other chances to make new friends!

Back to peeves: Echoing others on the RSVP issue: I'm in charge of a big fundraising dinner the weekend after this and people have waiting until the very, very last minute to RSVP on their attendance. I have lost so much sleep over this - the invites went out 7 weeks ago!!! Bleah....The event coordinator at the venue says its getting worse along these lines, for what reason she does not know.

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2 hours ago, athousandclowns said:

I’ve been looking online for the last 6 months thinking about a cruise or travel by myself. I’ve only been on the 4 night Mexico cruise years ago with my late husband and enjoyed it. Do you mind telling me what kind or destination you went on? My two best friends who are long time married gay males kinda led me to believe we’d do a trip when one got an inheritance in November but they haven’t said anything since so I’m thinking they’ve rethought it. I might add they are going on a weekend getaway in a couple of weeks. I’m put off and hurt when I think how I’ve treated them to a coastal getaway, always  driven my car on day trips dinners treated birthday dinners etc now don’t think I’m even in the picture now they have  new car .  
I’m in desperate need of a trip

I don't do conventional cruises, but I do like expedition cruises.  Small ships, lots of off-ship activities, and off-the-beaten-path destinations.

My peeve is that I haven't won the Powerball lottery so I can't afford to travel for a while.  Oh, and carried over from chat, I'm a little peeved about receiving a summons for jury duty.

Re: the RSVP situation -- usually when people don't RSVP, it's because they've forgotten or just can't be bothered (aka inconsiderate).

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On 9/26/2023 at 4:25 PM, Ohiopirate02 said:

I drink pop not soda, use a pen not an ink pen, and it's a crick not a creek.  

It's only a crick if a cow is standing in it.

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Just now, nokat said:

It's only a crick if a cow is standing in it.

Thank you!  Wish I could quote this on my hometown's website. The folks who live on the mountain side of town just loooooove to say "crick". It's like fingernails on a blackboard to me (do most people know today what a blackboard used to be? do blackboards still exist?)

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Just now, annzeepark914 said:

(do most people know today what a blackboard used to be? do blackboards still exist?)

Maybe somewhere. I firmly believe you need chalk dust to learn anything.

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I've always been a loner....which I'm finding the most unhealthy part of that is I'm not socially filtered at all.  Like my social skills never developed properly.  For example when somebody says something I don't like or what not I always just feel like screaming Fuck You to them versus someone more "socially filtered" who knows how to deal.

 

 

Having Asperger's/Autism isnt any kind of super power.  For the most part it sucks 

 

 

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41 minutes ago, nokat said:

Maybe somewhere. I firmly believe you need chalk dust to learn anything.

Menu boards are technically chalkboards.  And even if schools have BLACK (or green) chalkboards, teachers will likely use "chalk markers" over traditional chalk.

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The blackboards/chalkboards in our school buildings have all been replaced with whiteboards and use dry erase markers.

I think people RSVP at the last minute, for any occasion, because you are the placeholder event, but something better might come along…

Edited by chitowngirl
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43 minutes ago, chitowngirl said:

The blackboards/chalkboards in our school buildings have all been replaced with whiteboards and use dry erase markers.

I think people RSVP at the last minute, for any occasion, because you are the placeholder event, but something better might come along…

But this is a kids' party, not for me.  I'm still leaning on cultural differences, which was what my parents suggested.  They might not even know that RSVP means to please get back to me (though they should have clued in.  These people are not tech illiterate).

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Sometimes it gets annoying when your posts get merged together when they are a few minutes apart and have nothing to do with each other.

 

That and sometimes auto spell.  Per say always seems to get misspelled 

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10 hours ago, oliviabenson said:

Good becomes hood

f becomes ducking 

haha

Ah, yes. Autocorrect. I thought that I'd disconnected it but, no...it persists. I'd sent my sister & niece an email one day recently and got a laughing response from my niece. I reread my email and was shocked to see that instead of the word I'd used, "also", that autocorrect subbed a 5 letter word that starts with "d" and ends with "o"...a word totally not in my vocabulary. And so, I now proofread *everything* 😁

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On 10/4/2023 at 7:35 PM, nokat said:

(do most people know today what a blackboard used to be? do blackboards still exist?)

As a kid, the very best present I got one Christmas was a stand up blackboard and on the top it rolled showing pictures of things.  Also came with a big box of colored chalks.  I love that thing to death and drew pictures everyday.  I always bought my grandkids little blackboards with chalk.  They loved them too.   Bet Amazon has them.

Edited by kristen111
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2 hours ago, kristen111 said:

As a kid, the very best present I got one Christmas was a stand up blackboard and on the top it rolled showing pictures of things.  Also came with a big box of colored chalks.  I love that thing to death and drew pictures everyday.  I always bought my grandkids little blackboards with chalk.  They loved them too.   Bet Amazon has them.

I wasn't allowed to use chalk indoors when I was a kid!  My parents thought it was too dusty, so they got me a white board with dry-erase markers instead.  I DID have an easel blackboard that used chalk, but I could only use it in the summer, outdoors.

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The only place I used chalk was on pavement outside our back porch where my friends & I played hopscotch and roly-poly. We kids had such simple pleasures back then. I don't remember anyone creating elaborate art on sidewalks. But then, I also don't remember seeing any graffiti in our small city (nor on NYC subways!).

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Idiots in cars.

I was driving down a short one-way street tonight to pick up my dinner. It has a straight lane and a left turn lane, and you can’t turn right because that is a different one-way street. So, um, imagine how surprised I was to see some asshole guy (or lady) driving down the street as I was approaching the straight lane, and asshole driver is using the left turn lane as if you can go straight the other way. Like the straight lane was a dividing yellow! Do people even pay attention anymore? I see so many people using double yellow lines and left turn lanes to pass since they’re in such a hurry God forbid.  The person coming towards me is very lucky they didn’t crash into me head on because I’d make sure everyone who had to be involved knew it was their fault. 

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On 10/6/2023 at 5:49 PM, kristen111 said:

As a kid, the very best present I got one Christmas was a stand up blackboard and on the top it rolled showing pictures of things.  Also came with a big box of colored chalks.  I love that thing to death and drew pictures everyday.  I always bought my grandkids little blackboards with chalk.  They loved them too.   Bet Amazon has them.

I had a blackboard too.  It was hung on the wall of my room.  It was pretty big, considering, maybe two feet by three feet.  My friends and I would play "school."  Or when alone I would just draw pictures.  I loved it.   I'm too old for whiteboards.  They hadn't been invented yet.  In school, sometimes our teacher would hang large pieces of white paper on the blackboard and write on them with black marker instead of using the blackboard.  I have no idea why, other than she needed to preserve them for some reason. 

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A work pet peeve--people who choose to reply all when it is not necessary and they know better.  My boss has a habit of replying all when he is working from home, I guess to show us all he is working even if he is not in his office.  Just now, our business manager sent an email informing us she's about to close payroll, and he replies all to say "thanks."  Why do I need to see this as I am catching up on my email.  The job makes me have my email on my phone as well as on the work computer, so I get two notifications of his thanks to another employee, and the chain is broken if I did need to respond back to the original sender.  

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11 hours ago, Ohiopirate02 said:

A work pet peeve--people who choose to reply all when it is not necessary and they know better.  My boss has a habit of replying all when he is working from home, I guess to show us all he is working even if he is not in his office.  Just now, our business manager sent an email informing us she's about to close payroll, and he replies all to say "thanks."  Why do I need to see this as I am catching up on my email.  The job makes me have my email on my phone as well as on the work computer, so I get two notifications of his thanks to another employee, and the chain is broken if I did need to respond back to the original sender.  

My favorite is "take me off this chain" or "stop replying to all".

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I always had it engrained in me not to disagree with people.  Even for example someone disagreed on my opinion of where the best hot dogs were.  Then I wondered if he thought I was like real weird or something.  

As I said I have always felt throughout my life like I didnt have proper social filers/filtering.  You know what my parents get some blame for that.   

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My former boss would send me an email and IMMEDIATELY pick up the phone to call me to tell me he just emailed me and what the email said.  I'm into my sixth decade of being able to read and comprehend the printed word; the phone call was unnecessary.  

The worst is the person who replies to all, then sends another reply to all, apologizing for replying to all. 

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On 10/9/2023 at 9:39 PM, Calvada said:

My former boss would send me an email and IMMEDIATELY pick up the phone to call me to tell me he just emailed me and what the email said.  I'm into my sixth decade of being able to read and comprehend the printed word; the phone call was unnecessary.  

The worst is the person who replies to all, then sends another reply to all, apologizing for replying to all. 

My former boss used to print out emails -- both sent and received, depending on the nature of the topic -- and walk over to people's desks with it in his hand to further discuss it. 

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7 hours ago, Browncoat said:

Cloudy days when there's an eclipse.  Even though it's only a partial eclipse where I am, it still would have been cool to see.  

Yeah cloudy here too in MT. We were supposed to have 80% coverage. Sigh... It did get a bit darker, but not that much. The rest of the day from then on was nice and sunny, go figure!

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I'm in a partial eclipse area for next Spring, but it looks like that one will be around 85% here (as opposed to about 40-50% yesterday).  The clouds broke a little just past the peak, so I was able to get a glimpse before they moved over the sun again.  

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No luck here in Western MT. Clouds completely blocked the sky.We were supposed to be in 80% coverage. Maybe next year we'll be luckier. A friend in CA had a neighbor get a fantastic photo of the eclipse. My friend saw it but didn't have proper filters for his camera.

eclipse 10-14-23.jpeg

Edited by Gramto6
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"Read that again," as used in memes and posts that are intended to be poignant, sensitive, inspirational, helpful... It was 12 words; I read it just fine the first time -- don't assume that I need to be gently pushed into understanding and subsequent internal healing!

Edited by TattleTeeny
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21 hours ago, TattleTeeny said:

"Read that again," as used in memes and posts that are intended to be poignant, sensitive, inspirational, helpful... It was 12 words; I read it just fine the first time -- don't assume that I need to be gently pushed into understanding and subsequent internal healing!

I feel that way about "say that louder for those in back."  First of all, we're reading so louder won't help. Second of all, nobody is going to agree on everything all the time.  That's just a fact.  Screaming won't change people's minds.  

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