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Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"


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Your Pet Peeves are your Pet Peeves and you're welcome to express them here. However, that does not mean that you can use this topic to go after your fellow posters; being annoyed by something they say or do is not a Pet Peeve.

If there's something you need clarification on, please remember: it's always best to address a fellow poster directly; don't talk about what they said, talk to them. Politely, of course! Everyone is entitled to their opinion and should be treated with respect. (If need be, check out the how to have healthy debates guidelines for more).

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10 hours ago, KittyMom4 said:

 

 

 

10 hours ago, KittyMom4 said:

er. He  could have just explained that for sanitary reasons the cashier is not allowed to touch it. 

Well, I thought this would be the last word on ice cream cones, but I realized I had to add one more thing.  The cashier was the person who scooped the cone.  So she was already  holding it.  SORRY, EVERYONE!

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Personal pet peeve - I am either a hypochondriac or easily suggestible.  Reading the news yesterday I started worrying that a dry patch on my forehead must be cancer.  Today, reading about Lisa Marie Presley I am experiencing pain near my heart.  Jeeze.   I just spent almost 3 years sure I had Covid.  Damn good thing I didn't go into nursing!

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On 1/9/2023 at 9:30 PM, EtheltoTillie said:

 

Well, I thought this would be the last word on ice cream cones, but I realized I had to add one more thing.  The cashier was the person who scooped the cone.  So she was already  holding it.  SORRY, EVERYONE!

Person washed hands (hopefully) and/or put on clean gloves, scooped ice cream, handed you ice cream then touched other things, right? If so, her hands were no longer clean. I get that you were annoyed that she wouldn't hold the cone for you but if she were to take it back without washing her hands or putting on gloves she would be violating food safety rules.

Edited by theredhead77
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1 hour ago, theredhead77 said:

Person washed hands (hopefully) and/or put on clean gloves, scooped ice cream, handed you ice cream then touched other things, right? If so, her hands were no longer clean. I get that you were annoyed that she wouldn't hold the cone for you but if she were to take it back without washing her hands or putting on gloves she would be violating food safety rules.

But that's not what happened.  She scooped the cone and was ready to hand it to me.  I asked her to hold it for a few moments more.  And the supervisor got angry and threatened to throw it at me.   Finally I took it.  This was not about food safety rules.  It was about an obnoxious supervisor who didn't want to be  nice for a few seconds so I could put my money away.  It may violate safety rules that the people who scoop the cones also take the money.  But that's how they do it.

Edited by EtheltoTillie
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I have a pet peeve that consists of people who hate stuff and want you to very much hate that stuff too. I am not talking about the things one should hate, such as racism, homophobia, misogyny, etc. But, rather, a TV show, an inoffensive celebrity, a style of house, etc. 

I know people who get twisted in knots over other peoples' innocent preferences that frankly have nothing to do with them.

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2 minutes ago, Enigma X said:

I have a pet peeve that consists of people who hate stuff and want you to very much hate that stuff too. I am not talking about the things one should hate, such as racism, homophobia, misogyny, etc. But, rather, a TV show, an inoffensive celebrity, a style of house, etc. 

I know people who get twisted in knots over other peoples' innocent preferences that frankly have nothing to do with them.

This.  And this goes back decades for me - as a teen, I would look for hints that someone liked a show before bringing it up.  Why?  Because I was notoriously teased for liking 90210 in Grade 7 (this was 1991-92, during the HEIGHT of its popularity) because it wasn't a thing for kids in that age group in Bermuda.  Likely because it was on too late (Bermuda is on the Atlantic time zone.  The show was airing at 9 PM Eastern on Thursdays back then, so it would have been 10 PM Atlantic.  Basically bedtime or just past it for the average 12 year old.  Hey, it was the same reason why I didn't watch ER until I was in university).  Unlike my family, not everyone's would dedicatedly tape it EVERY SINGLE WEEK!!!

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My current pet peeve is people, whether they’re experts or not, saying, “We’re all going to get COVID at some point.”

Yeah, no. I can’t with that nihilism. Not when I’ve driven myself crazy trying to keep me and my family safe. I am not fucking around with long COVID.

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Back several pages/months(?) someone posted a peeve about the phrase "asking for a friend" and it not being funny (I agree). I would like to add the phrase "say it louder/let me say it louder for the ones in the back" to the eye roll category. I guess it was considered smart or cool at one time, a way to make yourself the person in charge of what is important for others. 

 

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9 hours ago, Spartan Girl said:

My current pet peeve is people, whether they’re experts or not, saying, “We’re all going to get COVID at some point.”

Yeah, no. I can’t with that nihilism. Not when I’ve driven myself crazy trying to keep me and my family safe. I am not fucking around with long COVID.

This is what I've been saying despite 3 full strength injections + 2 boosters, and wearing masks while out & about. I have enough problems with fatigue so I sure don't want to invite long Covid. I've read several articles re: long Covid that convinced me to keep on protecting my health.

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On 1/12/2023 at 9:03 PM, EtheltoTillie said:

But that's not what happened.  She scooped the cone and was ready to hand it to me.  I asked her to hold it for a few moments more.  And the supervisor got angry and threatened to throw it at me.   Finally I took it.  This was not about food safety rules.  It was about an obnoxious supervisor who didn't want to be  nice for a few seconds so I could put my money away.  It may violate safety rules that the people who scoop the cones also take the money.  But that's how they do it.

That’s crazy for multiple reasons, one being that, even if there was the possibility of a safety violation, the supervisor’s response is still inappropriate. And OK, how are people supposed to put away the money then? Do they want you to stand in front of the register, with your loose money on the counter, until you finish the ice cream right there? Do they want you to spill the ice cream on the floor as you put the money away? Maybe they want you to leave your change and go?

1 hour ago, stewedsquash said:

Back several pages/months(?) someone posted a peeve about the phrase "asking for a friend" and it not being funny (I agree). I would like to add the phrase "say it louder/let me say it louder for the ones in the back" to the eye roll category. I guess it was considered smart or cool at one time, a way to make yourself the person in charge of what is important for others. 

 

I feel this way about “read that again” and “I’ll wait.”

Edited by TattleTeeny
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1 hour ago, stewedsquash said:

Back several pages/months(?) someone posted a peeve about the phrase "asking for a friend" and it not being funny (I agree). I would like to add the phrase "say it louder/let me say it louder for the ones in the back" to the eye roll category. I guess it was considered smart or cool at one time, a way to make yourself the person in charge of what is important for others. 

 

“Asking for a friend” I can probably dismiss as an eyeroll-worthy dad joke. However, may I submit “you’re welcome” (absent an actual thank you/you’re welcome situation). 

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My peeve might be ME! Yet again, my weird aversion to certain voices is making me nuts. I’m catching up on podcast episodes from earlier this year (Up & Vanished) and the usual host is, for some reason, not narrating. The voice that is doing it now is so unpleasant that it is making me (a) crazy and (b) feel bad for thinking this about this woman, who is probably a perfectly lovely person! But, as it is, her voice sounds to me like a Kristin Wiig character — who has an annoying voice. 

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1 hour ago, TattleTeeny said:

My peeve might be ME! Yet again, my weird aversion to certain voices is making me nuts. I’m catching up on podcast episodes from earlier this year (Up & Vanished) and the usual host is, for some reason, not narrating. The voice that is doing it now is so unpleasant that it is making me (a) crazy and (b) feel bad for thinking this about this woman, who is probably a perfectly lovely person! But, as it is, her voice sounds to me like a Kristin Wiig character — who has an annoying voice. 

I can relate. I'm not super picky about voice in general (mostly just worry about my own), but I like a good speaker if I'm listening to someone speak at length. For me that means, don't speak extremely fast, don't constantly stutter, don't drag out what you have to say, and don't speak in a super high pitch. Also not a fan of a robotic voice for audio books. I'd rather just read. 

Edited by RealHousewife
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Voices annoy me too.  I can't stand super high pitched voices or adults who talk to children as if they're much younger.  

 

Another issue:  I have trouble understanding some accents.  I end up getting very frustrated and annoyed because I can't understand them and am worried they don't understand me.  Good thing I don't get too angry - otherwise, I'd be Karened (can an early 40s Asian woman be called a Karen?)!

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26 minutes ago, RealHousewife said:

I can relate. I'm not super picky about voice in general (mostly just worry about my own), but I like a good speaker if I'm listening to someone speak at length. For me that means, don't speak extremely fast, don't constantly stutter, don't drag out what you have to say, and don't speak in a super high pitch. Also not a fan of a robotic voice for audio books. I'd rather just read. 

Ugh. Vocal fry. My DIL does it and it drive me crazy!

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32 minutes ago, RealHousewife said:

I can relate. I'm not super picky about voice in general (mostly just worry about my own), but I like a good speaker if I'm listening to someone speak at length. For me that means, don't speak extremely fast, don't constantly stutter, don't drag out what you have to say, and don't speak in a super high pitch. Also not a fan of a robotic voice for audio books. I'd rather just read. 

Oh, yes — plus, I can read way faster than I can listen. Sometimes I do want the audio book in addition to the actual book if the author is the reader (for example, Joe Kenda and Rainn Wilson, but especially David Sedaris).

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I've mentioned this before but: weddings with a color scheme. I just received an invite to a wedding which had strict instructions about which colors were acceptable to wear as a guest.

For women, red and other "eye-catching jewel tones" are out. Female guests must be in a shade of pastel or neutral.

Wtf? When did this become a thing?

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9 minutes ago, Lady Whistleup said:

IFor women, red and other "eye-catching jewel tones" are out. Female guests must be in a shade of pastel or neutral.

Wtf? When did this become a thing?

When the current generation was evicted from The Womb, and every day after told they were everything the world needed.

Oh, and Instagram.  Gotta photograph well for The Gram. Might be someone needing to be influenced.

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40 minutes ago, Lady Whistleup said:

I've mentioned this before but: weddings with a color scheme. I just received an invite to a wedding which had strict instructions about which colors were acceptable to wear as a guest.

For women, red and other "eye-catching jewel tones" are out. Female guests must be in a shade of pastel or neutral.

Wtf? When did this become a thing?

I get it for the bridal party, but guests?  Is the wedding on or around Halloween or something?

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2 hours ago, Lady Whistleup said:

I've mentioned this before but: weddings with a color scheme. I just received an invite to a wedding which had strict instructions about which colors were acceptable to wear as a guest.

I've never been invited to such a spectacle, but I'd check "Hell to the no" on the RSVP card in a hurry if I was.

Edited by Bastet
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17 minutes ago, Lady Whistleup said:

No! It's a summer wedding. She says she wants a certain "aesthetic."

Well, if I didn't have something in my wardrobe that suits her request (I don't as I am a jewel tone person), I am not about to go out and buy a dress to wear as a guest. Frankly, I just would skip the wedding.

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3 hours ago, PRgal said:

Voices annoy me too.  I can't stand super high pitched voices or adults who talk to children as if they're much younger.  

 

Another issue:  I have trouble understanding some accents.  I end up getting very frustrated and annoyed because I can't understand them and am worried they don't understand me.  Good thing I don't get too angry - otherwise, I'd be Karened (can an early 40s Asian woman be called a Karen?)!

For me a Karen is anyone who makes a big stink over nothing. 

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2 hours ago, Lady Whistleup said:

For women, red and other "eye-catching jewel tones" are out. Female guests must be in a shade of pastel or neutral.

Alrighty, bridezilla. I'll be showin' up in a neutral white suit--the kind that has a big cape jacket (like the royals have been wearing lately). Where do these people get the nerve to tell their guests what to wear? This is so rude.

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There was a recent Ann Landers column (okay, probably not Ann Landers, but whoever's in the newspaper) about a bride who wanted all the guests to wear yellow.  Apparently dictating to your guests is becoming a thing.

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1 hour ago, Lady Whistleup said:

No! It's a summer wedding. She says she wants a certain "aesthetic."

It's a good thing for this^ bride that I'm not invited.

I would give my apparel a great deal of thought for her special day. 

Yes, I'm that friend. She would need another budget line item for Excessive Photo Editing.image.png.5a6a13b30e8c94f0813a257e9ed68cec.png

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Edited by SuprSuprElevated
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I would wear the color if I was asked nicely—I just don’t even care (provided I have/find something I like in said color; I draw the line at wearing something I don’t like!). Plus, I think a theme is kind of fun. That said, if I don’t wear the color, what would happen? No one will take a photo with me in it? Good. I’ll be at the bar or on the dance floor anyway!

Edited by TattleTeeny
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21 minutes ago, Lady Whistleup said:

The author of that is nuts.  Just as I moved on from puzzling over how the hell this one would accomplish the stated goal:

Quote

You can either list the colors you would like them to wear or request that they avoid wearing certain colors.

For example, you might say, “We hope our guests will come dressed in their favorite color.”

I got to this gem:

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The card asks guests to wear a color representing their relationship with the bride or groom.

For example, if you are the bride’s mother, you might request that guests wear white in honor of your daughter’s purity on her wedding day.

Edited by Bastet
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I also love this gem:

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When requesting that your guests wear certain colors, be sure to be clear about what you’re asking for.

If you want them to all wear the same color, specify that.

If you’re asking them to stay within a certain color palette, be sure to list out the colors you’re considering.

The last thing you want is for your guests to show up in something that doesn’t fit your vision for the day.

 

Oh the horror.

Here's another website that gives advice on this:

https://www.theknot.com/content/monochromatic-wedding-attire

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If you've ever seen photos of an all-white wedding and thought to yourself, "Wow, they look chic"—you're certainly not the only one. (What is it about a white party that makes everyone look snazzy?) And to get all of your guests to wear one color is an undeniably impressive feat, no matter the size of your guest list.

But how do you pull it off? Whether it's an all-white wedding you're after, or you'd simply prefer for your guests to sport blue at your beach wedding, you'll have to put in a little extra effort to make sure your ceremony is monochromatic. (Pro tip: It'll pay off in spades with gorgeous wedding photos and just a generally stylish, elegant and curated vibe.)

Oh, and if you're nervous about seeming over-demanding about your dress code request, don't be. Your wedding should be your vision, and there's a way to go about it so you don't put people off with your request.

 

 

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59 minutes ago, SuprSuprElevated said:

It's a good thing for this^ bride that I'm not invited.

I would give my apparel a great deal of thought for her special day. 

Yes, I'm that friend. She would need another budget line item for Excessive Photo Editing.image.png.5a6a13b30e8c94f0813a257e9ed68cec.png

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I LOVE that red and black dress. I have absolutely nowhere to wear it…!

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1 hour ago, Browncoat said:

There was a recent Ann Landers column (okay, probably not Ann Landers, but whoever's in the newspaper) about a bride who wanted all the guests to wear yellow.  Apparently dictating to your guests is becoming a thing.

It’s Ask Amy; Ann Landers died years ago.

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1 hour ago, SuprSuprElevated said:

It's a good thing for this^ bride that I'm not invited.

I would give my apparel a great deal of thought for her special day. 

Yes, I'm that friend. She would need another budget line item for Excessive Photo Editing.image.png.5a6a13b30e8c94f0813a257e9ed68cec.png

image.thumb.png.eb571af488b39e5853a543a838746605.png

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Wouldn't it be hilarious if a bunch of wedding guests showed up in outfits like these? The bride's reaction would be memorable.

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I am just contrary enough that I would wear the opposite color.  Or maybe if the color scheme were yellow, I'd wear green -- there's yellow in green!  But I don't think anyone has dictated my clothing choices since I was a toddler.  I don't even have a dress code at work.

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Ha—people attempt to “dictate” women’s clothes all the time, particularly women over a certain age; we’re not “allowed.” It’s a peeve of mine (that and the “no long hair” after age [arbitrary #]). But never mind that; if these weddings are color themed, what about the men who wear suits? Do they wear pastel (or whatever) colored ones? 

Edited by TattleTeeny
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On 1/2/2023 at 8:47 PM, Lady Whistleup said:

This is super petty, but I really hate it when people with obvious veneers brag about how great their teeth look. Like dude, you paid for those teeth.

I guess they're truly trying to put their money where their mouth is!

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10 minutes ago, TattleTeeny said:

Ha—people attempt to “dictate” women’s clothes all the time, particularly women over a certain age; we’re not “allowed.” It’s a peeve of mine (that and the “no long hair” after age [arbitrary #]). But never mind that; if these weddings are color themed, what about the men who wear suits? Do they wear pastel (or whatever) colored ones? 

It seems to be a universally accepted theme that guys can buy one suit and that will pretty much take them through all their life, but women have to buy a different dress for every occasion.

3 minutes ago, Blergh said:

I guess they're truly trying to put their money where their mouth is!

I feel the same about people who get Botox and then brag how smooth their skin is. 

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12 hours ago, Lady Whistleup said:

I feel the same about people who get Botox and then brag how smooth their skin is. 

Botoxed faces have a certain look to them--just a bit tooooo perfect (& a tad puffy). I can usually spot them. I've had some plastic surgery on my face but it wasn't like the Hollywood type where it changes the shape of one's eyes.  Thankfully, it took the slight scowl off my face 😊. After that surgery, I've no longer been asked, "What's wrong?"

 

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Quote

It seems to be a universally accepted theme that guys can buy one suit and that will pretty much take them through all their life, but women have to buy a different dress for every occasion.

Maybe. But does that mean the men are excused from the color theme?

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1 hour ago, annzeepark914 said:

I've had some plastic surgery on my face but it wasn't like the Hollywood type where it changes the shape of one's eyes.  Thankfully, it took the slight scowl off my face 😊. After that surgery, I've no longer been asked, "What's wrong?"

I had eye bags and uneven, hooded eyelids after a bout with Graves disease and I had some plastic surgery early last year to fix it. Nothing that was impeding my vision or causing any issues, I just didn't like the way I looked. Now, people who don't know tell me I look so rested and happy, lol.

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7 hours ago, Browncoat said:

If I want the whole wedding in blush and bashful

"That sanctuary looks like it's been hosed down with Pepto-Bismol."

Shelby (Steel Magnolias) is a good illustration of how ridiculous this notion of instructing guests to dress in a certain color is -- while she attached pink bunting to anything that would hold it, had a pink carpet runner laid down, put pink flowers all around, and picked out pink bridesmaid dresses, she didn't demand guests come dressed like bubble gum so the photographs would have a "curated vibe".

Guests are people, not props.

Edited by Bastet
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7 minutes ago, Bastet said:

"That sanctuary looks like it's been hosed down with Pepto-Bismol".

Shelby (Steel Magnolias) is a good illustration of how ridiculous this notion of instructing guests to dress in a certain color is -- she attached pink bunting to anything that would hold it, put down pink carpet, put pink flowers all around, and picked out pink bridesmaid dresses, but she didn't demand guests come dressed like bubble gum so the photographs would have a "curated vibe".

Guests are people, not props.

Totally agree- especially with your last sentence! Someone needs to tell Ask Amy, though, who likes to dictate what others totally unconnected to her are to wear- and how to behave!

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What's weird is how many of these wedding advice pages talk about how no one should come that doesn't fit your "vision." I guess I come from a huge Asian family where a wedding "vision" is lots of relatives eating a bunch of stuff. I am surprised to hear brides talking about color themes and "vision" like it's some sort of Instagram filter.

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