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Alyssa and John: Lunch with Lurch

Meredith Quill

By Meredith Quill
in Bringing Up Bates

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Notabug
Notabug

My nephew drowned in a swimming pool when he was 5.  Just thinking about Alyssa's kids living in a home where their parents are doing virtually nothing to protect them against accidental drowning is m

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I'm so tired of people who have never darkened the door of a public school pontificating about what teachers do and don't do.  I have several friends who are teachers and they work their butts off to

crazy8s
crazy8s

My son and DIL are college educated people working real jobs and are somehow incapable of buying their 5 children shoes or winter boots that fit. We took it on ourselves, as the grandparents, to buy t

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GeeGolly

GeeGolly

I don't mind the date word, but I agree with the tarting out. I think one on one time with the non primary parent is awesome, but it should be age appropriate. He can even by them flowers, but they should be going to MacDonald's or Chuck E Cheese. Or a picnic and fishing - whatever the little one is into at the time.

The tarting out, John in a suit, the coming to the door - its all so, so wrong.

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Rootbeer

Rootbeer

(edited)
31 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

I don't mind the date word, but I agree with the tarting out. I think one on one time with the non primary parent is awesome, but it should be age appropriate. He can even by them flowers, but they should be going to MacDonald's or Chuck E Cheese. Or a picnic and fishing - whatever the little one is into at the time.

The tarting out, John in a suit, the coming to the door - its all so, so wrong.

Yeah, it's creepy.  Much better to take her to the playground or the pool or to Build a Bear.  When I was in high school, I did a lot of baby sitting.  I babysat for one family, very nice people, who had a daughter and several sons.  I remember her father gave the daughter a dozen red roses for her third birthday and her mother was all excited about it.  I just remember 15 year old me thinking 'Why would a 3 year old want roses?  Wouldn't she rather have a toy?'  Same thing with Daddy-Daughter Date night.  It ought to be something the kid would enjoy, not just an Instagram worthy event.

Now, some little girls enjoy dressing up and even carrying a purse like Mommy and wearing 'makeup' and, if that's what this kid wanted to do, then, fine.  My mom would put clear lip gloss on us for 'makeup' when we were little.  We also had those fake Tinkerbell kiddie cosmetics to play with. A kid that small doesn't need mascara or colored gloss though.  If she is taught that she needs enhanced at that age, she is going to be freaking out when she's 30.

Edited by Rootbeer
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3 is enough

3 is enough

The dressing up and makeup and hair are creepy.  As is John showing up at the door.  Just take the child out for one-on-one time without calling it a "date".  She 's  only 5.  

On Reddit there is some speculation that Alyssa is pregnant.  Apparently she has been posing for pictures holding Maci in front of her stomach and she looks pale.  I can't say I noticed any of these things.  I certainly would not be shocked if she was , but time will tell.

 

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Lisa418722

Lisa418722

We know she will only be allowed to "date" two men in her life. Her daddy and her husband.  I think it's sweet that John wants to spend time with his daughters, but calling it a date, wearing a suit, ringing the doorbell, bringing flowers, and having her dress up with her hair and makeup is what puts it in the creepy category to me personally.  When I was a kid my dad never took me anywhere other than one of the "nicer" stores in town (it was a small town at the time) to buy my mom's Christmas gift.  But we didn't eat dinner out, he didn't dress up and neither did I.  

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floridamom

floridamom

The kid is 5 years old! Creepy, yes, to say the least. To call this a 'date' is so wrong. You don't 'date' your parent. If they want to spend special time together, yes, I agree that part of an afternoon doing kid-like things together is just more normal IMO. Go to the park, out for pizza etc. It's NOT A DATE. Doesn't John live with them? So why did he have to act like he doesn't live there and ring the doorbell...with roses no less? He has 4 daughters....and 'counting'..how much time will he have to devote to dating his daughters..oh yes, and his wife too?

 

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Kiss my mutt

Kiss my mutt

So, where did they go on their “date”, I wonder? I would definitely be giving them a “wtf” look if I saw a little girl all dressed up with makeup accompanying an older man to dinner and wonder if something untoward was going in.  It just feels inappropriate. Why not have a daddy daughter day without bringing in the dating aspect? 
Poor girl, she’ll never know anything but how to be a wife.   

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emmawoodhouse

emmawoodhouse

6 minutes ago, Kiss my mutt said:

So, where did they go on their “date”, I wonder? I would definitely be giving them a “wtf” look if I saw a little girl all dressed up with makeup accompanying an older man to dinner and wonder if something untoward was going in.  It just feels inappropriate. Why not have a daddy daughter day without bringing in the dating aspect? 
Poor girl, she’ll never know anything but how to be a wife.   

They went to McDonald's and the park. They ate in the back of the SUV. This is SOP for the "dates."

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cereality

cereality

(edited)

Have they said already that it was just McDs in the back of the SUV - wonder if that's the new date for all the girls bc that's what Allie got in 2020; not that these fools care about Covid but her birthday fell at a time when restaurants in Orlando were actually closed so your only options were drive thru. So of course being idiots who are totally divorced from reality, Alyssa decorates the back of the SUV as if it's a make out spot for two high schoolers and that's where daddy and daughter had their McDs parked next to a romantic Orlando retention pond which probably had an alligator or two and then played hide and seek with moron John chasing the child around in a suit and dress shoes as he worried if the child would fall in the retention pond or run out into the parking lot while he had his eyes closed for her to hide . . . . The visual of a small child w/ a grown man in what high schoolers would clearly use as a make out/sex spot was beyond disturbing.

They are beyond gross with this dating daddy BS. One on one time with daddy for your bday - cool. You even wear a nice dress if you want to - cool. Mommy styling the child's hair and putting on makeup [and on one date for Allie talking her into wearing some other crappy plastic bracelet other than the one she wanted bc it would go better with her dress], Daddy in a suit and tie, picking you up for a date at the door, bringing your roses, and basically putting in your head that this is how it'll be when your husband arrives in 11-12 yrs - GROSS. As to the person saying how does he have time - fear not, John doesn't start dating them until age 5 I believe [could be 4].

I mean they take this dating crap SOOOO seriously that Alyssa was in the hospital having her freaking first heart surgery - which had complications - and John ran out afterwards w/ Alyssa still hospitalized to take Allie on her date?? At first I was like oh they had agreed in advance that he should go see her for her bday so she won't associate her bday with something bad like mommy in the hospital + no parents there to see her. But NOPE Alyssa had lined up a sweet friend to curl her hair, makeup etc. so it would be a DATE - to Outback Steakhouse IIRC.

Note to asshole John - spending time with your girls, good. But that time spent should be AGE APPROPRIATE and INTEREST APPROPRIATE - which means even though they are JUST girls, it should be DIFFERENT things with different kids. Sure some girls DO like getting dressed up - in that case why not take that girl someplace she'd like - hint hint like a ballet for Allie. This kid OTOH is the sporty one. You know what would've been a DREAM for her bday - going with daddy to the batting cages or to ride go carts or mini golf or to go watch a professional soccer game/sporting event. Oh wait what am I thinking, they're GIRLS. Their only interest is wanting to push out a baby in 14 yrs just like mommy did and of course daddy is thinking about that day and hoping it comes ASAP.

I feel esp bad for this kid. This is the sporty one who wants to be a dentist and that ain't ever going to happen - neither playing soccer nor 8 yrs of post high school education at a real university.

Edited by cereality
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Temperance

Temperance

I wore make-up at a young age, because I danced ballet.  It was for our recital and dress rehearsal only. Good memories! 

But the putting on make-up to go on a "date" with dad is something else. This isn't the first creepy father-daughter fundie thing. There are many examples, but the first one that comes to mind is Katey Nakatsu's father saying they went on "father-daughter dates" and she went on her last one right before she married Jed! Duggar.

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BitterApple

BitterApple

3 hours ago, 3 is enough said:

Alyssa is going nuts because her baby is turning one. The whole how did this happen, I can't believe it set of posts.

Sadly, I foresee a "What a surprise, we're pregnant!" announcement in the not too distant future. 

I've long said Alyssa will pop up pregnant once Macy starts transitioning out of the cute baby stage. I think the timing will depend on how well Allie is progressing in her Sister-Mom duties. 

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Temperance

Temperance

On 2/7/2022 at 3:24 PM, 3 is enough said:

Alyssa is going nuts because her baby is turning one. The whole how did this happen, I can't believe it set of posts.

Sadly, I foresee a "What a surprise, we're pregnant!" announcement in the not too distant future. 

They've already said they're considering more kids. It would be nice if she wasn't pregnant by the end of the year, but don't count on it.

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SMama

SMama

(edited)
58 minutes ago, ozziemom said:

So Jackson went to visit Alyssa, they gave him a plane ticket for his birthday. IIRC he just turned 16. Alyssa mentioned they are driving to Tennessee for I Love You day and he is going to help drive as they are going straight through. I’m not sure if he has a drivers license yet, but I know she hardly ever drives on these overnight trips. Not sure this is a smart move to let a teen drive but 🤷🏼‍♀️

Jackson is 20 years old.  Addie had her 16th birthday on the same day.

Edited by SMama
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ozziemom

ozziemom

3 hours ago, floridamom said:

Strange timing...the TV show is cancelled so Alyssa is stepping up to two YouTubes per week. Methinks the lost income is of concern to the Websters.

She’s only doing it for us! Her fans need to keep up with her daily life beyond just Instagram, 😂 How else is she going to get free matchy clothes for her girls? 

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BitterApple

BitterApple

I feel so bad for Alyssa's kids. Carlin had a video up in her stories the other night of her and Layla going to visit Alyssa at her hotel. Allie answers the door all happy and excited, and then she's immediately crestfallen once she realizes Carlin is filming. These poor children are never allowed to simply exist and enjoy the moment. Everything is performative, even a trip to a damn fast food restaurant. It's exhausting to watch. I can't imagine how much worse it is to live it. 

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BitterApple

BitterApple

Alyssa's video about traveling to TN for I Love You Day:

https://youtu.be/9v8b2CDdAdY

They left for a 10 hour drive as soon as John got home from work and got into town at 2 a.m. Everyone was noticeably exhausted the next morning, so naturally Gil, Kelly, Carlin and the grandparents thought it was a perfect time to visit. 

One thing that stood out to me was how Maci and Layla are nearly the same size, despite a one year age difference. I know in terms of parentage, John has height while Carlin and Evan don't, but Layla is really little, like jarringly so. 

Also, Gil is such a dick for making John drive to the restaurant. Both John and Alyssa looked pissed when he ambushed them about it as soon as they exited the hotel. 

Maci blowing Alyssa off in favor of Ellie was awesome. Lexi is my favorite Webster kid. She's got a lot of spirit and she'd totally be that rebellious tomboy if her parents would let her. 

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65mickey

65mickey

(edited)

Alyssa looked at Gill like really when he said that John was driving because he, Gil wanted to sit in the back with his wife. I guess Alyssa didn't feel like she could speak up and say John just drove 10 hours after working all day so can you cut him some slack? I would have so much respect for Alyssa if she said to John you are exhausted I'll drive. Gil's head would have exploded. 

Edited by 65mickey
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floridamom

floridamom

So, the skirts were only for the tv show. I could not help but notice how tight Alyssa's jeans were when she and Gil were outside getting in the van. She also had very high stiletto heels on which did not fit her. (They were too big.) I would not even wear jeans that were so tight. Gil said nothing to her about her "immodest dress", apparently. Such hypocrites. I remember Alyssa said that she had to wear skirts/dresses when on the show because it's her father's show....isn't this video also going out to their devoted fans? IMO, some of the married Bates daughters dress quite sexy. Gil is and always has been an ass. Kelly needs to seriously lose some weight. Her health and the GERD she suffered(s) from would improve.

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65mickey

65mickey

I don't have a problem with how Alyssa or how any of the grown women dress She is an adult woman and can dress how she pleases. This is not her dad's TV show anymore. And he has no right to feel that he can dictate a dress code to his adult daughters.

Too bad that John probably does not have the guts to say to Alyssa next year you go  if you want and I'll stay home. But I know that would never happen. 

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BitterApple

BitterApple

2 hours ago, 65mickey said:

Too bad that John probably does not have the guts to say to Alyssa next year you go  if you want and I'll stay home. But I know that would never happen. 

Right? The guy drove ten hours to eat at a crappy restaurant, attend a half-assed party and drove ten hours home. What was the point of them even going when they didn't stay to spend time with the family? It hardly seemed worth dragging four kids across state lines. 

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BitterApple

BitterApple

Part 2 of I Love You Day:

https://youtu.be/ykfwKhr3R2M

Not much there. Party at the big house and the kids receiving their gifts. Brief clip of family photo shoot before they drove home.

I felt a little bad for Alyssa's girls. They seemed overwhelmed with the noise and chaos, and weren't really interacting with their cousins. At one point it got so loud, Alyssa had to take Maci to the car so she could nap. 

I don't know if Alyssa went because she gets tons of pressure from Kelly, or if she needed content for her YouTube, but the whole thing seemed like a waste. They're going to see everyone at Lawson's wedding in a few weeks anyways, so I would've sat this one out. Alyssa and John looked annoyed and exhausted when they were driving home, so I imagine they shared similar sentiments. 

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ozziemom

ozziemom

Seems like the Bateses were together a lot in 2021 between the weddings and showers but they were still filming so it will be interesting to see what happens after Lawson wedding. I would be surprised if all the grandkids attend the wedding , flying to California could be beyond the budget of the Webster and Paine families. 

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BitterApple

BitterApple

(edited)
2 hours ago, ozziemom said:

Seems like the Bateses were together a lot in 2021 between the weddings and showers but they were still filming so it will be interesting to see what happens after Lawson wedding. I would be surprised if all the grandkids attend the wedding , flying to California could be beyond the budget of the Webster and Paine families. 

Even Carlin was saying she and Evan weren't sure if they were going to bring Layla. I know the Bates didn't make nearly as much money as the Duggars in terms of episode pay, but I think they got a crap-ton of perks like paid airfare, hotels, food allowances, decorating budgets, etc. If they were still being filmed, Layla staying behind wouldn't be an option. 

Like you, I'm curious as to what Erin, Tori and Alyssa will do. That's a lot of plane tickets. Even if they fly Spirit or Allegiant, the costs will add up. I wouldn't be surprised either if some of the grandkids stayed behind. I could even see Zach and Whit not taking the entire brood. 

 

 

Edited by BitterApple
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SMama

SMama

2 hours ago, ozziemom said:

Seems like the Bateses were together a lot in 2021 between the weddings and showers but they were still filming so it will be interesting to see what happens after Lawson wedding. I would be surprised if all the grandkids attend the wedding , flying to California could be beyond the budget of the Webster and Paine families. 

Don’t forget Tori & Bobby. That’s four plane tickets. 

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Jeanne222

Jeanne222

Why did they stay at a motel with tons of family there.  Surely  mom and dad could put them up for a night?

I'm thinking this show isn't over just yet.  Remember the Duggers come back after Josh's offense.  Something will blossom for all those kids..  Maybe just the girls since it was a boy Bates that offended.

It's not over till the fat lady sings.  Hang in there.

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SMama

SMama

1 hour ago, Jeanne222 said:

Why did they stay at a motel with tons of family there.  Surely  mom and dad could put them up for a night?

I'm thinking this show isn't over just yet.  Remember the Duggers come back after Josh's offense.  Something will blossom for all those kids..  Maybe just the girls since it was a boy Bates that offended.

It's not over till the fat lady sings.  Hang in there.

Zach and family are living at the big house while renovating their new house. C&E have a two bedroom tiny townhouse. Erin has five kids in a 2 bedroom cottage. Josie has two kids in possibly a two bedrooms. Michael and Tori are unknown as to space available. Alyssa’s family of five is too large to host. Katie and Travis slept on twin air mattresses on Carlin’s & Evan’s living room. TBH I’d gladly spend money on a hotel room rather than being around so many people. I’m sure Alyssa is the same.

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BitterApple

BitterApple

4 hours ago, Jeanne222 said:

Why did they stay at a motel with tons of family there.  Surely  mom and dad could put them up for a night

It was an absolute madhouse at Kelly's. They've got close to 20 people living there, between the unmarried kids, Gil, Kelly and Zach's family. Michael's place is tiny, Carlin was hosting Katie, and Josie doesn't seem to be big on guests. Alyssa strikes me as someone who needs her space and her routine, so the hotel was the best option. 

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Absolom

Absolom

5 hours ago, Jeanne222 said:

I'm thinking this show isn't over just yet.  Remember the Duggers come back after Josh's offense.  Something will blossom for all those kids..  Maybe just the girls since it was a boy Bates that offended.

Do we know for sure it was a boy Bates that offended and what happened for sure?  I haven't seen or heard anything about what occurred to cause the sudden cancellation only speculation.  

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