Small Talk: The Prayer Closet

Almost 3000 · May 4, 2016

Its been making me sign in today but only once before this. Odd.

Can't wait until they set-up a way to customize the home/forum page or have they finished that fix and I just haven't found it yet?? Oddly again, I set it up last week and then my selections all disappeared. Its now such a waste of time scrolling through all the shows to find the bolded ones I follow that have new posts so I've just been hanging out with the Duggars and Housewives because those threads move fast enough for new reading.

frenchtoast · May 4, 2016

They are working on the customizing and it can't come soon enough. I had to hand write all my forums down so I could run through the home page and look for all my forums. It is...unfun.

The need to sign in repeatedly I haven't seen reported in the Bugs. The first step would be to clear you cache. If that doesn't help, you can post a new topic in the Bugs area or ask a Question in the questions area. In that section of the site, posts and topics require mod/admin approval before they become "active". It's normal SOP, so don't feel bad.

Happyfatchick · May 4, 2016

You know how you take your car to a mechanic because it's making a weird noise, and he starts the car 15 times and drives it 15 miles and it never ONCE makes that noise for him? I hear Twilight Zone music. I've been off of here and back several times since I posted that it made me log in every time, and it hasn't happened once since then. I woulda complained earlier if I'd known that!

I do feel like I'm bouncing around an awful lot to get where I want to be, but I'm really not tech savvy (except with embroidery programs - I can get you to the finish line every time with those things - I could practically make a spread sheet with my embroidery software). Eventually, I'll figure out how to be where I want, and I'm patient enough to ride along until the light comes on.

But hey, saying that about the spreadsheet reminds me of the first programs I ever fell into. I got this killer job once, Lord only knows how I sweet-talked my way into that - except that it was in the WORST part of Atlanta (west end) and maybe nobody else was brave enough to interview. I'm one of those who doesn't play well with others, because (of course) I always know best. I ALWAYS took the shortest route, and could organize a posse any day of the week. (And make people enjoy the spectacle:. SCORE!). Anyway, shortly after getting the job, I realized it was 95% numbers and reporting. Holy cow!!! I am surely going to DIE. This was MANY years ago, when a calculator, a quick mind and a good eraser were my best friends. I immediately started ferreting out the best way to save time, and stumbled across LOTUS123. Remember that? Honey please! I came back to the office and put everything in my office into that program. (I still remember my boss standing uncertainly by my desk with his reports saying "are these right? Are you sure you trust that thing?"). No one in the whole building had it until then, but it quickly became everyone's best friend. (I was a hero for a minute). In just a few short years, I switched to Excel, and I thought I had been blessed by angels. I know I'm sounding old (I AM!). But this is all coming from a woman who took a typing class in the 70's that required me to lift my right arm and return that carriage at the end of every line of type. I remember, also, when I got my first IBM Selectric with that little screen at the top of the keyboard where I could watch my type as I put it in. BEST THING EVER! AND I remember when we got a word processor in the office and we only had the one. It was in the middle, and if you had a big job, you had to wait your turn. Those were the days when I HAD to play nice - but it drove me crazy, the inefficiency. We had to, as a department, put out a newsletter that was mailed (thousands of them) all over the US. When I went there, it was the sloppiest, most disorganized mess I'd ever seen in my life. Every month, it took 5 of us 3 days to get that stupid thing mailed. I did that twice before I started getting up and driving downtown at 4 in the morning on the first day they were delivered so I could organize and get that thing gone. Drove me up a wall, and they'd been doing the pigslop thing since before Adam and Eve procreated! Get'er done!!!

lookeyloo · May 4, 2016

20 minutes ago, Happyfatchick said:

You know how you take your car to a mechanic because it's making a weird noise, and he starts the car 15 times and drives it 15 miles and it never ONCE makes that noise for him? I hear Twilight Zone music. I've been off of here and back several times since I posted that it made me log in every time, and it hasn't happened once since then. I woulda complained earlier if I'd known that!

I do feel like I'm bouncing around an awful lot to get where I want to be, but I'm really not tech savvy (except with embroidery programs - I can get you to the finish line every time with those things - I could practically make a spread sheet with my embroidery software). Eventually, I'll figure out how to be where I want, and I'm patient enough to ride along until the light comes on.

But hey, saying that about the spreadsheet reminds me of the first programs I ever fell into. I got this killer job once, Lord only knows how I sweet-talked my way into that - except that it was in the WORST part of Atlanta (west end) and maybe nobody else was brave enough to interview. I'm one of those who doesn't play well with others, because (of course) I always know best. I ALWAYS took the shortest route, and could organize a posse any day of the week. (And make people enjoy the spectacle:. SCORE!). Anyway, shortly after getting the job, I realized it was 95% numbers and reporting. Holy cow!!! I am surely going to DIE. This was MANY years ago, when a calculator, a quick mind and a good eraser were my best friends. I immediately started ferreting out the best way to save time, and stumbled across LOTUS123. Remember that? Honey please! I came back to the office and put everything in my office into that program. (I still remember my boss standing uncertainly by my desk with his reports saying "are these right? Are you sure you trust that thing?"). No one in the whole building had it until then, but it quickly became everyone's best friend. (I was a hero for a minute). In just a few short years, I switched to Excel, and I thought I had been blessed by angels. I know I'm sounding old (I AM!). But this is all coming from a woman who took a typing class in the 70's that required me to lift my right arm and return that carriage at the end of every line of type. I remember, also, when I got my first IBM Selectric with that little screen at the top of the keyboard where I could watch my type as I put it in. BEST THING EVER! AND I remember when we got a word processor in the office and we only had the one. It was in the middle, and if you had a big job, you had to wait your turn. Those were the days when I HAD to play nice - but it drove me crazy, the inefficiency. We had to, as a department, put out a newsletter that was mailed (thousands of them) all over the US. When I went there, it was the sloppiest, most disorganized mess I'd ever seen in my life. Every month, it took 5 of us 3 days to get that stupid thing mailed. I did that twice before I started getting up and driving downtown at 4 in the morning on the first day they were delivered so I could organize and get that thing gone. Drove me up a wall, and they'd been doing the pigslop thing since before Adam and Eve procreated! Get'er done!!!

Happy - we must be of similar vintage but I am older. I have had many of those same experiences. I worked for the meanest woman alive and we had small program budgets to reconcile. The secretary and I put them into excel. She forced me to do them all by adding machine and bring her the tape because she didn't trust the "computer". Which was always right by the way. And in one agency we had inferior equipment and insufficient staff and were told to "work smarter, not harder". Fun times. Except not.

Micks Picks · May 4, 2016

I met a woman this weekend who was making plans to go the Gosset convention, in Virginia I think, next month. She is an amazing embroiderer and seamstress. Made me think of you. And then there is the cousin who works in the film industry and has seen your work.

Happyfatchick · May 4, 2016

OH!!! Really, Micks? I somehow missed that you had a cousin who'd seen my work. I'm blushing a little! Every now and then, I get invited onto a set when I deliver seats and it always makes me grin a little to see my seats on set. It's a kick! I've asked once if I could take pics of the seats (not with actors of course, just the seats) and the props guy looked horrified enough that I don't ask that anymore. I don't want to sell trade secrets or blow their cover, I just want pics of the seats on set. I did have a props girl who loved me enough to sneak me pics of a DeNiro seat on set, and she also sent me pics of all the Last Vegas seats lined up when they did an interview on GMA before the release. I ought to put that in an agreement that I get to have a pic of the seats on set. Here's what would happen:. Um, no. Did the cousin say which movie set they saw? It may not have been my work at all. I've only done a couple movies in LA. It just depends where my props guys are working. The props guys (Props Masters) sort of campaign for the shows they want to do. It's all kind of political. If they don't get the job they want, the union will send them to work on something until they get someone else. But I have about 8 Props Masters who use me exclusively (and who all believe I only work for them). I'm sorry, I'm rambling.

Apparently, I'm good at making people think they have to stick with me. I've had regular-people customers over the years who ONLY use me for embroidery, even though they either drive miles to get to me, or ship items to me to embroider. I have one of those shipments coming by Friday from Texas. I am fairly confident that she could get this done west of the Mississippi just as easily - but she always does this.

GeeGolly · May 4, 2016

Where is Koka?

Catlyn · May 4, 2016

Quote

Quote

processor in the office and we only had the one. It was in the middle, and if you had a big job, you had to wait your turn. Those were the days when I HAD to play nice - but it drove me crazy, the inefficiency. We had to, as a department, put out a newsletter that was mailed (thousands of them) all over the US. When I went there, it was the sloppiest, most disorganized mess I'd ever seen in my life. Every month, it took 5 of us 3 days to get that stupid thing mailed. I did that twice before I started getting up and driving downtown at 4 in the morning on the first day they were delivered so I could organize and get that thing gone. Drove me up a wall, and they'd been doing the pigslop thing since before Adam and Eve procreated! Get'er done!!!

Happy - we must be of similar vintage but I am older. I have had many of those same experiences. I worked for the meanest woman alive and we had small program budgets to reconcile. The secretary and I put them into excel. She forced me to do them all by adding machine and bring her the tape because she didn't trust the "computer". Which was always right by the way. And in one agency we had inferior equipment and insufficient staff and were told to "work smarter, not harder". Fun times. Except not.

We must be of an age, because I remember similar experiences. One of my first jobs was at a law firm and when they got the first memory writer everyone was amazed! You could type a document, correct any mistakes, and save it in a "bin" and then have it print out correctly at one time! You could also put in stops to let you type in information for multiple form letters. Oh those days before computers! You learned how to use white-out so no one could tell, how to cut and paste (using real scissors and glue) and then copy the document on the new copiers that didn't leave any tell-tell toner lines.

kathe5133 · May 4, 2016

Speaking of job inefficiencies, I once worked in a place where there was a payroll run of about 400 checks that needed to be distributed to 13 offices. The checks printed out in employee number order and needed to be sorted for the office they were to be mailed. All 10 people who worked in this office wheeled their chairs to the center corridor. Everyone took a pile of checks. Each person had a paper list, in most cases handwritten, of who worked in which office. The lead person would read off the name of the person, and someone would shout out that they had it. Took two days to get payroll out! After watching this foolishness for about an hour I suggested the checks be alphabetized, the lists of offices be typed into Excel, sorted alphabetically. Then it would be a simply a matter of one person separating checks into 13 piles. I was met by stunned silence. "Then we would have to alphabetize the checks and someone would have to type all the names into the spreadsheet. We don't have time for that!" No, but you have time to spend two days playing a demented game of Bingo? I have zero tolerance for this kind of bullshit. I made sure come payroll time I had an elsewhere to be so I didn't have to "play". But, the Director of this group was constantly fielding calls from her staff complaining that they weren't getting their paychecks in a timely manner. Everyone assured her they were doing it the best the could! I knew this woman, and she knew me. She asked me my opinion and of course I gave it. Since I am an apt storyteller, I think she thought my story was enhanced for comic affect, so she made it a point to come by to help next payroll run. Day arrives, she greets the staff and they wheel a chair into the hallway for her. I went out for a smoke. Five minutes later she joins me. "That's the biggest fucking mess I have ever seen! I've told them it was changing, you were changing it, they are to give you what you need and do what you say!" I cut a two day project down to two hours. Everyone in payroll hated me, but those receiving paychecks were very grateful!

Barb23 · May 4, 2016

All this talk about the good old typing days has had me smiling especially the reference to "cut & paste.". My MIL thought she was something cuz she had a word processor at home when they first came out. I don't know why she had one (she wasn't a writer or typist) but it was given a table of honor in her bedroom. Even tho I remember the manual typewriters of yesteryear, (my mother still has one) I was lucky enough to learn on an electronic IBM. Back in the 70's, my cousin was working on getting his doctorate. His wife, who was the typist for his thesis, was so excited because she could get the specific typing balls with the scientific type face on them from IBM. Boy how things have changed. Back then a guy was considered lucky to have a mom, sister, girlfriend or friend that could type a paper for him.

On a different note, we have had nothing but cloudy, gloomy, cold rainy days here in Maryland for about a week with the same for the rest of this week. The sun did come out for a little bit Monday afternoon but that's been it. I think I'm starting to get that seasonal disorder (SADD not SAHD, lol) not to mention what it's doing with my arthritis. The rainy weather does play havoc with the joints, it has something to do with barometric pressure, per my rheumatologist. I really want to pack away my sweatshirts, get out my T-shirts & plant some flowers.

Happyfatchick · May 4, 2016

Barb, I suffer with depression (which shames me for some reason - I pride myself on my happy-go-lucky disposition and I argued for months, YEARS, even about the diagnosis. I always hear Tony Soprano's mom screeching "WHAT'S HE GOT TO BE SAD ABOUT???" And no matter who joins me and admit they fight with depression, it never makes me feel any better. I feel I've failed myself somehow - like depression is tied to failure to appreciate the GOOD things you have...it's not.). I decided last winter that I have SADD as well, because my depression kicks into such a high gear in autumn that meds don't conquer it. I bought this little light box, about the size of the old makeup mirror I had in junior high. When I'm working, I turn it on once a day and fill up my little cells with fake sun rays (it's not hot, but it's noisy). It helps. It has a timer for 15 minutes. It really does help.

Back to the office - I was TOTALLY in love with that white out correction tape - the kind you slid behind the little thingy against the paper and hit the wrong letter again so it would be covered up. And whoever mentioned cut and paste - HA!!!!!!! How many TIMES did I do THAT??? You retype the whole paragraph, paste it in (oh so careful to line up your margins!), make a copy, use white-out to paint the lines from the copier and copy it again. I'd totally forgotten that, and it was my best trick! In my early days of secretaryism (it's a word, look it up), I had a boss who traveled a whole lot and was addicted to dictation. He was also prone to wander. unfortunately, he also suffered from sinus issues. So my dictation often sounded like this: Dear Ralph and Edna, It was so good to see you and spend some time in your lovely home this past weekend. (Schllleeeeep). [I'm currently flying over the (schleeeeepppp).....,ah......Sierra Nevadas and...........(schleeeeepppp).....wow, it is beautiful up here. Don't type that, I was just (schleeeeeeeeep) commenting...] grrrrrrrrrrr!!!!! He drove me out of my MIND with his sidetracks and snot face. I typed a letter EXACTLY like he dictated it once, and we passed that sucker around the office for weeks. (I really don't play well with others). I got in trouble a lot when I was a secretary. Ok, truthfully, I could have stopped with i got in trouble a lot.

And Kathe, you're telling of the payroll fiasco is an exact replica of a nightmare I lived through as well. Same exact deal, except that we didn't have 10 people working on the sorting. There was a company policy that 2 people had to sort payroll one of whom had to be me and the other had to be a manager from a different department. When I first arrived (HR manager), I was horrified at little piles of checks everydamnwhere and the most insanely ridiculous sorting system on the planet (disregarding yours, of course). Plus there was some sort of weirdness going on with the warehouse clock, and someone had to play with the final hours count and manually figure OT every week. I did that for 2 weeks (oh, and of course I had to chase down a manager to sit and play the payroll game with me every week. The managers were all "onto" that trick and just evaporated at payroll sort time). I forget now, how I fixed that (seems like it was an easy sort fix when running the actual payroll checks). The company owner was amazed and astounded. "You can DO that????" They'd been playing that stupid pile/sort/check/stuff game for years by then. They couldn't believe there was another way to do it. They also were reluctant to allow me to turn that particularly "fun" game over to my payroll clerk. She GENERATED the payroll, but wasnt a manager so couldn't sort and stuff. BUT WE'VE ALWAYS DONE IT THIS WAY!!! IT'S POLICY!!! It took me 2 months of logic lessons (ok, and begging) before they'd let me turn that whole thing over to the clerk who created payroll in the fist place.

Oh! I had ANOTHER payroll clerk in a different job (who's name was Kathy!). She was about 4'10, tiny little somebody, and she always kept her hair crispy perm fried, and her husband was about 6'8 (no kidding - we used to do parodies of them dancing at the Christmas dance every year - hilarious!). She had GIGANTIC blue eyes, and a pure sense of innocence about her that just radiated off her. Very good at her job, though. Commander Kathy about her payroll. Nothing happened, ever, in payroll that Kathy didn't press the button to make it happen. Every single week, one of the factory workers would stomp into Kathy's office and proclaim "They took too much taxes out on me this week!". And the little payroll princess (who always knew VERY WELL what happened with their particular check) would widen those blue eyes and say "THEY DIIIID?????!!!!!" No matter how angry they were when they marched in, she disarmed them every single time with that little "Gretchen-lost-in-the-woods" look of hers. When the employee left, she would always giggle and say "those THEY people have been at it again. If I ever catch those THEY people, I'ma beat 'Em!!!" I loved her.

oh the stories I can tell of life in HR in rural companies. The time an employee stuck his fingers in the hand drier to see if there really was a fan blade in there. (There was). The time an employee tested positive for pot after an accident but insisted he had most certainly NOT been smoking weed...and the plant manager overrode me and made me bring him back. He was all cocky and telling me during the paperwork phase that he was glad that had blown over, he couldn't BELIEVE he (of all people) had tested positive when he NEVER touched weed... I said "come with me". I marched him across the parking lot and I said, "I don't know HOW you talked Mr Blop into bringing you back, and I don't care. You smoked weed. YOU SMOKED WEED. You know it, I know it, everybody knows it. Do not EVER bring this subject up again, you hear me?" The time an employee's mother died and I found out 17 (SEVENTEEN!!!!) employees were related to her/him and we had to shut down production the day of the funeral (and the Plant Manager mad at ME, as if I gave birth to all those people!) The time I had the town's local drag queen show up for an interview wearing a tux with a gold cummerbund with perfect makeup, manicured nails and drenched in White Shoulders perfume.

Good times! Sorry I took up so much space on memory lane today! (I really have productive work to do!!!)

Edited May 4, 2016 by Happyfatchick
Re-typed a sentence that got cut out...as if I needed to make it lengthier!

frenchtoast · May 4, 2016

Depression lies. It LIES. It's not you, it's depression, and depression LIES.

Minivanessa · May 4, 2016

21 minutes ago, frenchtoast said:

Depression lies. It LIES. It's not you, it's depression, and depression LIES.

I love you for posting this.

That is all.

zoomama · May 5, 2016

happyfatchick, sent you a pm.

and yes, depression is a tough nut. i deal every day with it and take my happy pill. some days are just a waste but most days i can paint on a smile and get through.

ps, i am back home from texas again. gonna be here for a couple months before i go again.

emma675 · May 6, 2016

Yay, the customized homepage is back! I was missing that, bad.

lookeyloo · May 6, 2016

And it goes right to the last read post!!

Absolom · May 6, 2016

I am so thankful. Hunting for the last thing read was dancing on my last nerve. The new site is far from pretty, but at least it's mostly functional for me now. I'm still wondering why they didn't just buy one of dressy front ends for $30 a year. It would have solved so many problems.

Edited May 6, 2016 by Absolom

CherryMalotte · May 7, 2016

I have never been a card holiday person, but Happy Mother's Day to all here who celebrate that sort of thing. Myself...I'm skipping this one.

Deadpool on blu ray this week. That's truly compensation for me.

frenchtoast · May 7, 2016

When my kids asked me what I wanted for Mothers Day, I answered, "Deadpool" even if it comes out two days after. So, for the actual day, we're going to see Captain America: Civil War tomorrow with my mom and the family we see movies with and then Chinese after. It's going to be awesome.

Sadly, I know too many people from here and TWoP that will be missing their mothers tomorrow. I'll be thinking of you--you all did good by your moms. You don't need a holiday for them to know you love them.

BitterApple · May 7, 2016

We're going to see Captain America tomorrow as well, although I'm still having withdrawals from Jungle Book. I don't know if I'm ready for another movie, lol.

My mom loves reading all the gossip rags when she goes to the hair salon, but would never pay for them at the store, so for Mother's Day, I ordered her yearlong subscriptions to People, US and InTouch. She was super excited when I told her, which was really cute.

Hope everyone has a great weekend!

Westiepeach · May 7, 2016

I am still missing my mom terribly, especially on Mother's Day. And my birthday, and her birthday, and my wedding anniversary, and on Tuesdays ... I miss her every day. I just wish she was here on earth to see my successful business, how I finally learned how to cook, and cook very well. I know she "knows" ... but I just wish she were HERE to see it. Ok, there is dust in my eyes now.

CherryMalotte · May 7, 2016

I've got a bitch of a head cold with the whole horror show of sweats and chills, otherwise I'd be having a swell time with Chris Evans myself...Mr Yummy Man. Made it out of the house yesterday to take my dad for groceries, and that was about it. Next weekend fer shure.

NewDigs · May 8, 2016

2 hours ago, Westiepeach said:

I am still missing my mom terribly, especially on Mother's Day. And my birthday, and her birthday, and my wedding anniversary, and on Tuesdays ... I miss her every day. I just wish she was here on earth to see my successful business, how I finally learned how to cook, and cook very well. I know she "knows" ... but I just wish she were HERE to see it. Ok, there is dust in my eyes now.

I am still missing my mom terribly, especially on Mother's Day. And my birthday, and her birthday, and my wedding anniversary, and on Tuesdays ... I miss her every day. I just wish she was here on earth to see my successful business, how I finally learned how to cook, and cook very well. I know she "knows" ... but I just wish she were HERE to see it. Ok, there is dust in my eyes now.

{{{{BigHugs}}}

(where'd that dust come from?)

Happyfatchick · May 8, 2016

6 hours ago, frenchtoast said:

I'll be thinking of you--you all did good by your moms. You don't need a holiday for them to know you love them.

This is, of course my first Mothers Day without a mom, and there are several of us in this group. {{Big hugs, everybody}}. I've had the "dusty eyes" all day. It's more painful than I thought. I'm trying hard to be a big girl and not whine when I really want to sit in a dark corner and suck my thumb. We got the camper less than 2 weeks after she died and have nearly worn the tires off. I've been hiding in the travel: the arrangements, buying and/or transferring groceries, figuring out what we'll do once we get there (wherever there is). We stayed home this weekend to dogsit and because we've been gone so much, and I've been caught off my game. Awhile back, a church we attended years ago and left without ever looking back (for good reason) called and asked me to play for the month. At the time of the call, I didn't think about it being Mother's Day, but knew I wasn't ABOUT to do the whole month, and agreed to do tomorrow as a sort of peace pipe. FABULOUS! So now I have to get up early and drive 20 miles to go play piano in a church I never wanted to step foot in again on a day I'd rather hide from. My Daddy would say I'm suffering from PPPP.

NewDigs · May 8, 2016

Aw, Happy. Your pain is so fresh and raw. I hope you find some peace in your music. Or enough rage to carry you away!

Be well.

All.

Love2dance · May 8, 2016

5 hours ago, Westiepeach said:

I am still missing my mom terribly, especially on Mother's Day. And my birthday, and her birthday, and my wedding anniversary, and on Tuesdays ... I miss her every day. I just wish she was here on earth to see my successful business, how I finally learned how to cook, and cook very well. I know she "knows" ... but I just wish she were HERE to see it. Ok, there is dust in my eyes now.

WESTIEPEACH, I wish I could be there to give you hugs and kisses. May your memories comfort you tomorrow.

Love2dance · May 8, 2016

10 minutes ago, Happyfatchick said:

This is, of course my first Mothers Day without a mom, and there are several of us in this group. {{Big hugs, everybody}}. I've had the "dusty eyes" all day. It's more painful than I thought So now I have to get up early and drive 20 miles to go play piano in a church I never wanted to step foot in again on a day I'd rather hide from. My Daddy would say I'm suffering from PPPP.

So sorry, HAPPYFATCHICK, this has to be terribly difficult with your mom passing so recently. Hopefully the distraction of the dreaded trip tomorrow will actually be helpful. May you be surrounded by loved ones the rest of the day. (And hopefully you are not cooking for all of them.) Hugs to you, too!

GeeGolly · May 8, 2016

Happy Mother's Day to all of you Mommas. And extra hugs for those of you without your Moms here today.

lookeyloo · May 8, 2016

Wishing a peaceful day to everyone. I am a motherless daughter - have been since 1977 - it gets different as time passes, at least for me. Not good, but different. My favorite aunt died during the year. First year without her. On the other hand, we moved closer to one of the sons so for the first time in many years, will spend the day with one of my offspring. The other one lives very far away in the Pacific Northwest. A mixed bag for sure.

Barb23 · May 8, 2016

5 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

Happy Mother's Day to all of you Mommas. And extra hugs for those of you without your Moms here today.

Ditto

crazycatlady58 · May 8, 2016

10 hours ago, Happyfatchick said:

This is, of course my first Mothers Day without a mom, and there are several of us in this group. {{Big hugs, everybody}}. I've had the "dusty eyes" all day. It's more painful than I thought. I'm trying hard to be a big girl and not whine when I really want to sit in a dark corner and suck my thumb. We got the camper less than 2 weeks after she died and have nearly worn the tires off. I've been hiding in the travel: the arrangements, buying and/or transferring groceries, figuring out what we'll do once we get there (wherever there is). We stayed home this weekend to dogsit and because we've been gone so much, and I've been caught off my game. Awhile back, a church we attended years ago and left without ever looking back (for good reason) called and asked me to play for the month. At the time of the call, I didn't think about it being Mother's Day, but knew I wasn't ABOUT to do the whole month, and agreed to do tomorrow as a sort of peace pipe. FABULOUS! So now I have to get up early and drive 20 miles to go play piano in a church I never wanted to step foot in again on a day I'd rather hide from. My Daddy would say I'm suffering from PPPP.

I cannot imagine going back to a church I left. I can here it now , " we missed you so much, does this mean your coming back?" My thoughts are with you on this . It's the mothers day Comercials that are hard for me , along with the sermons talking about how great mothers sre. When your mother was distant and/ or drunk it is not comforting . I do enjoy hearing about your mom HFC just so much love. And PPPP? My thoughts are with all of you, especially the ones having difficulty with this day.

frenchtoast · May 8, 2016

I have to share the card I got from my 10 year old daughter in the hopes it'll make you all chuckle. It reads: You make my life as good as you make your mac and cheese. Wich is delishius.

I'm thinking that's a hint about what she wants me to make for dinner soon.

crazycatlady58 · May 8, 2016

23 minutes ago, frenchtoast said:

I have to share the card I got from my 10 year old daughter in the hopes it'll make you all chuckle. It reads: You make my life as good as you make your mac and cheese. Wich is delishius.

I'm thinking that's a hint about what she wants me to make for dinner soon.

How cute. Be sure to save it for when she grows up.

zoomama · May 8, 2016

that card is precious, crazycatlady. definitely a keeper. i, too, am in the crowd of those who have lost their mothers. interestingly enough, my father passed away 5 years ago this morning, also on mothers day. so the day is bittersweet for me. i do have lots of kids and grandkids to make me feel the love and for that i am grateful.

Happyfatchick · May 8, 2016

4 hours ago, crazycatlady58 said: Commercials are hard for me , along with the sermons talking about how great mothers sre. When your mother was distant and/ or drunk it is not comforting . I do enjoy hearing about your mom HFC just so much love. And PPPP? My thoughts are with all of you, especially the ones having difficulty with this day.

Mothers Day commercials do indeed SUUUUUUCK for everybody who's mother has departed, and for those who didn't have great relationships. PPPP, for anyone who missed it (and it might be an old military thing, not sure)...is piss poor prior planning.

Church was about what I expected, it's falling apart at the seams and the people who grew up there are fighting for dear life. The poor young guy who leads the music doesn't actually READ music, he just knows what he hard on radio. So he hands me words on paper with chords above them. Ummmm, see, that might BE music for the average bear, THIS particular piano bear uses notes. (You know, the kind with circles, and circles with sticks on little staff bars). So that was interesting. Here's my small victory for the day: I did it, I lived, I never have to do it again. Ever.

Bonus victory: my husband's nephew is having a family barbecue for his mom and grandmothers. He's a sweet kid, they all are very sweet - but you've never EVER seen that much redneck Deliverance in one place in your life. We were on our way there after church when my hubs quite unexpectedly says "you don't have to go if you don't want. You might not feel like it yet". SCORE!!! I managed not to high five him, but I took the offer and came home where a BIG FAT NAP is now waiting. Happy Mother's Day TO ME!!!

the preachers wife said she got a handmade card from her 5-year old that had a great big dinosaur and a smaller one holding hands, and other dinosaurs standing around them. The one word bubble from a dinosaur in the crowd says "is that Bigfoot?" And the word bubble over the little dinosaur's head says, "no, that's just my mom".

crazycatlady58 · May 8, 2016

28 minutes ago, Happyfatchick said:

Mothers Day commercials do indeed SUUUUUUCK for everybody who's mother has departed, and for those who didn't have great relationships. PPPP, for anyone who missed it (and it might be an old military thing, not sure)...is piss poor prior planning.

Church was about what I expected, it's falling apart at the seams and the people who grew up there are fighting for dear life. The poor young guy who leads the music doesn't actually READ music, he just knows what he hard on radio. So he hands me words on paper with chords above them. Ummmm, see, that might BE music for the average bear, THIS particular piano bear uses notes. (You know, the kind with circles, and circles with sticks on little staff bars). So that was interesting. Here's my small victory for the day: I did it, I lived, I never have to do it again. Ever.

Bonus victory: my husband's nephew is having a family barbecue for his mom and grandmothers. He's a sweet kid, they all are very sweet - but you've never EVER seen that much redneck Deliverance in one place in your life. We were on our way there after church when my hubs quite unexpectedly says "you don't have to go if you don't want. You might not feel like it yet". SCORE!!! I managed not to high five him, but I took the offer and came home where a BIG FAT NAP is now waiting. Happy Mother's Day TO ME!!!

the preachers wife said she got a handmade card from her 5-year old that had a great big dinosaur and a smaller one holding hands, and other dinosaurs standing around them. The one word bubble from a dinosaur in the crowd says "is that Bigfoot?" And the word bubble over the little dinosaur's head says, "no, that's just my mom".

It sounds like your husband knew you had hit your limit for the day. There is nothing sadder than a church falling apart.

Barb23 · May 9, 2016

I miss those homemade cards.

kalamac · May 10, 2016

From Sew Sumi in the benessa threadQuote

I'm sure Boob starts off all potential suitors (you KNOW those girls don't have email accounts) with the stupid "Are You a Good Person" test. It's a favorite of Kirky Cameron, Ray Comfort, and the Maxwells. So...yeah....

http://www.needgod.com/004.shtml

I took the test.

CherryMalotte · May 10, 2016

frenchtoast I would totally frame that card or put it in a safe place. Then when she's a incoherent screaming nasty hormonal teenager telling you that you suck, and that you don't know how she feels, and that you are old old old you can pull out that card and say to yourself 'oh yes, she really does love me, and this will pass'.

Yeah it was a swell day Sunday, so great that I woke my husband up early so he could take me to see the doc in a box - I don't have the full diagnosis sheet in front of me but acute sinusitis was one of them. Horrible horrible headache, so bad I wanted to start pulling out teeth just for some pressure relief. Gawd I do love me some antibiotics...but I know myself that I'm rundown and need to schedule a regular physicians visit.

There's very few people that I can ramble on about my parental unit bullshit - but sometimes it has really helped to unload some of my junk here and I appreciate it. I don't know when I will ever really sort out my feelings about my mother's death because there's my dad, constantly poking me. He knows my husband has knee replacement surgery coming up in June, and is push push push about his getting his cataracts done. I know it's annoying, it's an impediment, it sucks to have them - but he's put up with having them now for at least three years that I know about and I wish he could just put up with it a little while longer. I've laid down to him that the next couple of months are not even my own and he's still bringing it up in near every conversation. He even made a PCP doctor appointment without telling me (oh yes, that was me you heard primal screaming in my bathroom the day I found out) so he could get to the eye specialist, who has to refer him to the VA hospital doctors to get it done. I even told him that I've damn near burned thru my work allowance time due to him and everything that went on with my poor mother, and he's just not wanting to hear it. I think the next option is a sledgehammer.

kathe5133 · May 10, 2016

I took the "need god" quiz. Yep, I'm going to hell!

Oh well. I never liked the cold anyway.

Love2dance · May 10, 2016

49 minutes ago, CherryMalotte said:

Yeah it was a swell day Sunday, so great that I woke my husband up early so he could take me to see the doc in a box - I don't have the full diagnosis sheet in front of me but acute sinusitis was one of them. Horrible horrible headache, so bad I wanted to start pulling out teeth just for some pressure relief. Gawd I do love me some antibiotics...but I know myself that I'm rundown and need to schedule a regular physicians visit.

There's very few people that I can ramble on about my parental unit bullshit - but sometimes it has really helped to unload some of my junk here and I appreciate it. I don't know when I will ever really sort out my feelings about my mother's death because there's my dad, constantly poking me. He knows my husband has knee replacement surgery coming up in June, and is push push push about his getting his cataracts done. I know it's annoying, it's an impediment, it sucks to have them - but he's put up with having them now for at least three years that I know about and I wish he could just put up with it a little while longer. I even told him that I've damn near burned thru my work allowance time due to him and everything that went on with my poor mother, and he's just not wanting to hear it.

Hope you feel better soon, and the meds kick in promptly, CHERRYMALLOTTE! Sinus pain is awful.

Maybe it's time to introduce your dad to Uber or the local taxi company. Is he possibly eligible for "dial a ride" (if it is available in your area for seniors/disabled)?

Hang in there. Hugs to you!

lookeyloo · May 10, 2016

See y'all in hell. I'll be there too

CherryMalotte · May 10, 2016

Just bring a dish to pass lookeyloo. I'll bring the taco dip.

I wish that the distance between the VA Hospital and where we live was closer, but it's just about an hour away. When there's surgery involved it's not a case of his getting the VA bus from our town to up to the hospital, and hell he'd need a ride to the VA bus. Thankfully he's had a few friends come forward and have given him rides up there for other visits the past couple of times. Just follow up stuff, nothing major thankfully, but he's got one appointment in early June that I have to attend to myself. God bless the VA and the people that run it because his care is for free, so it's no slight on them. I think if he wasn't just nagging on it all the time and was pulling up his britches and being more self sufficient, then maybe I wouldn't feel so pressured. As it is this week I have to fax my mother's death certificate to a couple of places and take in some bills and letters for her Medicaid application for coverage for the couple of months of care she did get. There's just always something else hanging around reminding me.

Edited May 10, 2016 by CherryMalotte

Happyfatchick · May 10, 2016

CherryM, I remember those days all too well. My dad would just make appointments willy hilly, seemingly without any regard for my time. And everybody on the periphery would say, "why don't you get one of those services to pick them up and bring them back home?" Or my personal fave, "Can't you just put her in a home?" Yeah, see, she IS in a home. HERS.

It makes me a little tired to think about it. You do whatcha gotta do. The thing is, we can't be in charge of how our parents have treated us in the past, or even how they disregard our current lives and families. I wasn't in charge of how they treated ME, I was in charge of how I treat them. When I get to the end of the road myself, I have to know that I know that I'm comfortable with what I did. I had to laugh about your primal bathroom scream. I used to do that in the car sometimes after I dropped them back at home. Sometimes you have to release and let it out. (And sometimes, you have to drink a margarita or 3). I think I bent the steering wheel in my car. OMG, when they both got to that horrifically feeble part of life - he was too weak to catch a stopped car, and she was so confused and lost. Sometimes, Daddy would pile 3-4 appointments into one day. Meaning Mama had to be dealt with at all times. Stop at the curb, park the dad on a bench, go back and fetch Mama, park her there and pray to Jesus that both of them would still be there when I parked in another county and ran back.

And a silly story (I have a MILLION!). Daddy was on Coumadin that caused him to have terrible nosebleeds. Couldn't stop them. So we were regulars at the ENT doc. He was having one of those events, and the doc was inserting this bulb thing (that is then filled with air that puts pressure on the blood vessel and hopefully eventually stops the flow). We got that gizmo thing several times, and Daddy HATED it. It was quite miserable looking from my POV, I can only imagine what it felt like. So the doc is doing his thing, explaining our course of action from here, while Mama is browsing Good Housekeeping, reading a recipe (aloud and loud, she was hard of hearing). Doctors talking while he's got his hands all up in daddy's sinus cavities. Daddy's going wah-wa-wah like Charlie Browns teacher trying to get Mama to hush, Mama is telling us how to make banana nut bread...and I'm thinking how long is it till I can get in my car and scream.

BitterApple · May 10, 2016

1 hour ago, kathe5133 said:

I took the "need god" quiz. Yep, I'm going to hell!

Oh well. I never liked the cold anyway.

Lmfaoooo, I just took it too and when asked if I thought I was going to Heaven or Hell, I clicked Heaven. The next screen said INCORRECT. Well alrighty then. I'll bring a big pitcher of Margaritas and a cooling fan. Make room on the bus.

NewDigs · May 10, 2016

I remember when I was young enough to think that life would be easier when I got older. Those were the days!

For some reason my, 92 yr. old, hard of hearing mom talks really really quietly. Is it loud in her head? Dunno. She's been kind of a rock star after her January bilateral knee replacements and today proudly announced to relatives that she listens to her doctor but not us (her "kids"). She doesn't fucking listen to any of us! When did I become the parent?

22 minutes ago, BitterApple said:

Lmfaoooo, I just took it too and when asked if I thought I was going to Heaven or Hell, I clicked Heaven. The next screen said INCORRECT. Well alrighty then. I'll bring a big pitcher of Margaritas and a cooling fan. Make room on the bus.

I don't need to take the test, I'll bring the beer. And the etc.

Jynnan tonnix · May 10, 2016

58 minutes ago, BitterApple said:

Lmfaoooo, I just took it too and when asked if I thought I was going to Heaven or Hell, I clicked Heaven. The next screen said INCORRECT. Well alrighty then. I'll bring a big pitcher of Margaritas and a cooling fan. Make room on the bus.

Did anyone try taking the test and filing in all the "correct" answers? I was curious, so I did. It told me that the Bible (aka God) says that it is impossible for a human being to remain true to the first commandment completely, therefore not only have you committed the sin of not putting God foremost in your life 100% of the time but you just lied on top of it. So, Hell for you.

Love2dance · May 10, 2016

25 minutes ago, Jynnan tonnix said:

Did anyone try taking the test and filing in all the "correct" answers? I was curious, so I did. It told me that the Bible (aka God) says that it is impossible for a human being to remain true to the first commandment completely, therefore not only have you committed the sin of not putting God foremost in your life 100% of the time but you just lied on top of it. So, Hell for you.

Looks like we will all be there together. Since BITTERAPPLE is bringing margaritas, I'll bring chocolate chip cookies. The chips should be nice and melty gooey.

GeeGolly · May 10, 2016

5 hours ago, Love2dance said:

Looks like we will all be there together. Since BITTERAPPLE is bringing margaritas, I'll bring chocolate chip cookies. The chips should be nice and melty gooey.

Oh well, I'm a coffee drinker - hot coffee - no matter the season. Guess I'm gonna be sweating my ass off.

Catlyn · May 10, 2016

It seems that everyone is going to hell with that test if they answered honestly and had a normal life. They didn't ask if you repented, what age your "sin" was, how are you doing now. So, one big happy party in hell for everyone. According to that test, God will be pretty lonely. That's also why I answered going to hell didn't concern me, too bad they don't ask why.

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