S03.E05: The Chamber of Judgement

[formerlyfreedom]

Quote

Justice is served, both vampirically and also in small claims court.

Airing Thursday, September 23, 2021.

[Lantern7]

Good episode. Bit of a drop from last week, but you can't really beat vampires in Atlantic City and a boxer getting his head punched the fuck off.

I don't think Guillermo was trying to be sinister so much as his unconscious demanded he screw with Nandor and Nadja's heads. Once again: the illusion of glamor of becoming a vampire has to fade away after living with three vampires with eroded brains. Of course, the guy who got caught in last season's raid got caught, got turned, and got put on trial for various offenses to the vampire community. Good to see Guillermo feel is conscience and bail the guy out . . . but now the kid is selling crap pyramid scheme pillows under Lazlo's direction. Death might have been better for Derek.

Anyone else find Sean exhausting? He exists to be a jabroni and for Lazlo to have a human best friend. Laz strikes me as the kind of guy that needs people like Sean to show people he's not that bad a guy.

Cute Hellhound!

Before I forget: how does one type out Nandor's catchphrase? I'm thinking "Fah King Guuuuyee!!!!" . . . like "fucking" is split into separate words. I'm just curious about what you think. Also, that works better for Nandor than "Bazinga!"

[peridot]

I love that Colin randomly broke out the Jar Jar Binks voice.  That was completely unexpected.  I was laughing when Lazslo thought that the guys night in was code for a circle jerk and then he came on to Sean.  I like that Sean wasn't homophobic, and even mentioned how poor Nandor's "boyfriend" is.  😄

The scenes at the council were hilarious - from the 10 second HR video to the giant scrapes on the floor after the throne was moved.  Nadja was hilarious after Guillermo tried to whisper in her ear a second time.

[ItCouldBeWorse]

27 minutes ago, Lantern7 said:

Before I forget: how does one type out Nandor's catchphrase? I'm thinking "Fah King Guuuuyee!!!!" . . . like "fucking" is split into separate words.

It sounded like Nandor said (to use your spelling) "Fah King Guide" when The Guide surprised him, Nadja and Guillermo at the beginning of the show.  I thought that was funny.

[Dev F]

I was waiting for someone to point out the hypocrisy of condemning Derek to death for betraying the secrets of vampirekind when our heroes are dragging a human documentary crew around with them everywhere they go. 

[LittleIggy]

It’s funny that Sean and his friends are so boring that Colin Robinson has no effect on them. Charmain couldn’t buy a Man’s Pillow. Since it says “Man’s Pillow” on the box, that is legally binding. 😂

3 minutes ago, ItCouldBeWorse said:

It sounded like Nandor said (to use your spelling) "Fah King Guide" when The Guide surprised him, Nadja and Guillermo at the beginning of the show.  I thought that was funny.

So was Lazlo’s “May I approach the bitch?”

[Lantern7]

18 minutes ago, ItCouldBeWorse said:

It sounded like Nandor said (to use your spelling) "Fah King Guide" when The Guide surprised him, Nadja and Guillermo at the beginning of the show.  I thought that was funny.

I was thinking general catchphrase, not specific variants. Also, I didn’t notice the “Guide” bit. Good catch. 🤓🙂

[thuganomics85]

Heh, Colin finally met his match by having Sean out-bore him of all things.  Guess I can't be too surprised that Sean somehow fell for some kind of multi-level marketing scheme involving pillows and tried to get the boys to bail him out.  And it all leads to Lazlo going back to his lawyer days and failing spectacularly due to the different times and just being Laszlo in general ("May I approach the bitch?") 

Nadja and Nador fighting over the throne and Guillermo's meddling was entertaining as expected.  Fun way to bring back the Derek character too and it sounds like he might be sticking around since Lazlo has unknowingly "taken him under his wing" now thanks to Guillermo.  At the very least, I'm sure Derek will get some clothes that aren't from Hot Topic!

Cutest hellhound ever!

[ItCouldBeWorse]

On 9/24/2021 at 12:24 AM, thuganomics85 said:

Fun way to bring back the Derek character too and it sounds like he might be sticking around since Lazlo has unknowingly "taken him under his wing" now thanks to Guillermo.  At the very least, I'm sure Derek will get some clothes that aren't from Hot Topic!

They will have to come up with a good reason why Guillermo does not ask Derek (who owes him his life) to turn him into a vampire.

Or, Derek could turn out to be Guillermo's new love interest.

Edited September 27, 2021 by ItCouldBeWorse

[Phishbulb]

7 hours ago, ItCouldBeWorse said:

Or, Derek could turn out to be Guillermo's new love interest.

I thought it was weird when Kristen Schaal's character was talking about all the sexual stuff they would do to each other, and Guillermo gave that little "no thanks" shake of his head. He's always been interested in women before...maybe The Guide just isn't his type. Hey, I think Schaal is cute 😀

Edit: Since the actor identifies as queer in real life, maybe they are heading for a romance between him and Derek on the show. They did hint at a more than servant type relationship with Nandor earlier in the season.

Edited September 24, 2021 by Phishbulb

[possibilities]

Lazlo is interested in women, too, but that didn't stop him from coming on to Sean and looking forward to a guy's night circle jerk. No reason Guillermo can't also be... flexible.

[Zonk]

15 hours ago, peridot said:

I love that Colin randomly broke out the Jar Jar Binks voice.  That was completely unexpected.

I loved his face when Lazlo said that he wasn't annoyed by it but rather found it funny. Such a great mix of annoyance and disdain and then confusion.

Edited September 24, 2021 by Zonk

[Blakeston]

I hate to say it, but this episode didn't do much for me. It had a few good quick gags here and there, but it wasn't nearly as good as most other episodes to me.

And I really hate to say this, because I usually love Kristen Schaal, but that accent is not working for me. At all.

 

[LittleIggy]

10 hours ago, possibilities said:

Lazlo is interested in women, too, but that didn't stop him from coming on to Sean and looking forward to a guy's night circle jerk. No reason Guillermo can't also be... flexible.

Lazlo has made reference to doing chaps and chapesses. Remember the Baron (Doug Jones’ character)? Both Lazlo and Nadja had a fling with him.

[MisterGlass]

This one felt a little scattered.  I wish they had gone a little further with how multi-level marketing could suck in even an energy vampire, but it was a fun bit.  Colin thought his mystery game was going to drain the party, but no.  I also laughed that Derek's penance is compelling people to buy them door to door.

I thought it was funny that when being Machiavellian didn't work for Guillermo he was reading Sun Tzu.

The wraith wearing a scream mask by mistake also made me chuckle.

[iMonrey]

Quote

I was waiting for someone to point out the hypocrisy of condemning Derek to death for betraying the secrets of vampirekind when our heroes are dragging a human documentary crew around with them everywhere they go. 

Plus "Vampiric Council" is right on the building's directory next to the elevator. And they have a website!!

[Ohiopirate02]

12 hours ago, LittleIggy said:

Lazlo has made reference to doing chaps and chapesses. Remember the Baron (Doug Jones’ character)? Both Lazlo and Nadja had a fling with him.

I have always believed that any immortal being like vampires are by nature pansexual.  What's the point of living for hundreds of years if you are heterosexual?  

I would also not be surprised to find out Lazlo had sex with any of those animals he once represented.  At this point, where would Lazlo not put his penis? 

[Ohiopirate02]

12 hours ago, MisterGlass said:

This one felt a little scattered.  I wish they had gone a little further with how multi-level marketing could suck in even an energy vampire, but it was a fun bit.  Colin thought his mystery game was going to drain the party, but no.  I also laughed that Derek's penance is compelling people to buy them door to door.

 

I love how into the game Lazlo was.  I get the feeling that Lazlo has begun to like Colin after spending so much time with him at the library and their car adventure.  

[possibilities]

Lazlo and Colin scenes are making both characters more interesting. I'm not sure the Nandor-Nadia combo is working as well. Nadia has been reduced to competing with him, and not much else, which I think reduces her. Nandor has had some great meoments this season, but they weren't really with Nadia.

 

[ItCouldBeWorse]

On 9/24/2021 at 10:48 AM, Phishbulb said:

I thought it was weird when Kristen Schaal's character was talking about all the sexual stuff they would do to each other, and Guillermo gave that little "no thanks" shake of his head. He's always been interested in women before...maybe The Guide just isn't his type. Hey, I think Schaal is cute 😀

Edit: Since the actor identifies as queer in real life, maybe they are heading for a romance between him and Derek on the show. They did hint at a more than servant type relationship with Nandor earlier in the season.

My recollection is that Guillermo only ever showed interest in men, even before we learned about his romantic interest in Nandor.

[sistermagpie]

5 hours ago, ItCouldBeWorse said:

My recollection is that Guillermo only ever showed interest in men, even before we learned about his romantic interest in Nandor.

That's what I thought too, but besides that, I don't think Guillermo would be interested in what she was suggesting regardless of whether it was with a woman or a man!

[Amethyst]

It's that Lazlow considers Sean to be his best friend, but I didn't need to hear about Sean's poor money management for another week.  Between gambling away all his savings to whining that his friends won't partake in his MLM scheme, I'm sick of him.  Didn't think the courtroom thing was very funny either.  It felt forced in there.  

I do like how Guillermo is standing up for himself more.  Even though he couldn't play Nandor and Nadia off each other for long, I don't blame him for trying.  

[possibilities]

For me, what makes the Sean scenes great is how totally oblivious he and his friends are to the fact that they're partying with VAMPIRES. It's fine that they don't suspect they're actual vampires, because who would actually believe it? But how Lazlo et al act and dress is very ... quirky? Odd? Shocking? It's not like they're goth teenagers. And Sean and his friends are completely unphased by it. That makes me like them. They don't treat Lazlo as a weirdo, they aren't even slightly mocking or gawking or uncomfortable. They were even in the house and it was all just fine. 

Edited September 29, 2021 by possibilities
fix typo

[Blakeston]

I'm trying to remember - when have we seen Guillermo show an attraction to men?

[sistermagpie]

50 minutes ago, Blakeston said:

I'm trying to remember - when have we seen Guillermo show an attraction to men?

For me it wasn't specifically that I remember him being shown attracted to men, but that I had no recollection of him being attracted to women, so that didn't figure into my understanding of his reaction to The Guide. But I did take the beginnings of his words in the last ep (about how he was about 10 or 11 when he realized he was...") to have something to do with being attracted to men. But I could be forgetting something.

[Vermicious Knid]

Nobody ever comments on the teeth. The vampires make no effort whatsoever to conceal them and yet no one ever seems to notice.

[LittleIggy]

3 minutes ago, Vermicious Knid said:

Nobody ever comments on the teeth. The vampires make no effort whatsoever to conceal them and yet no one ever seems to notice.

That would be impolite! 😏

[possibilities]

They probably think it's part of the costume. I had a friend who wore vampire teeth for Halloween one year, matched with a costume of this type.

[Cherpumple]

7 hours ago, possibilities said:

And Sean and his friends are completely unphased by it. That makes me like them. They don't treat Lazlo as a weirdo, they aren't even slightly mocking or gawking or uncomfortable.

Yes! They were just part of the gang in Atlantic City, and in this one I thought it was so sweet that Sean and his friends actually made the effort to play Colin's boring game, instead of just brushing it off to watch football.

When Sean started droning on about the Guy Pillow, the thought crossed my mind that we were witnessing the birth of a new Energy Vampire. Even Colin looked confused about where his mind-numbing sales pitch was going.

[tennisgurl]

When Sean was pitching his pyramid scheme pillow, I thought that we might witness the birth of a new energy vampire. That hang out was so dull that not even Colin Robinson could properly feed. I would totally watch a courtroom show with Lazlo as a lawyer in his old lady wig.

On 9/24/2021 at 12:35 PM, possibilities said:

Lazlo is interested in women, too, but that didn't stop him from coming on to Sean and looking forward to a guy's night circle jerk. No reason Guillermo can't also be... flexible.

Don't forget, he Nandor hooked up at some point too, which we found out when we realized that Lazlo will sleep with anyone with long dark hair and a vaguely European accent!

Who's a good hellhound? 

[ItCouldBeWorse]

On 9/24/2021 at 1:35 PM, possibilities said:

Lazlo is interested in women, too, but that didn't stop him from coming on to Sean and looking forward to a guy's night circle jerk. No reason Guillermo can't also be... flexible.

Lazlo is definitely pansexual. Under the right circumstances, Nadja and Nandor also.  But they are vampires and have seen it all. 

[possibilities]

It makes me laugh how Lazlo isn't bothered by Colin, even seems to like hanging out with him and does so by choice. I wonder if that makes Colin happy, or if it actually interferes with his energy sucking needs. 

[Ohiopirate02]

9 minutes ago, possibilities said:

It makes me laugh how Lazlo isn't bothered by Colin, even seems to like hanging out with him and does so by choice. I wonder if that makes Colin happy, or if it actually interferes with his energy sucking needs. 

I'm thinking that Lazlo's familiarity with Colin means Colin cannot feed off of him, and Colin is torn on whether or not this is a good thing.  Colin did not know how to react when Laszlo liked his Jar Jar Binks (??) voice since Colin did that to get a rise out of him.  There seems to be some subtle plotting on the part of the writers, and I am curious to see where this goes.

[Cherpumple]

1 hour ago, Ohiopirate02 said:

I'm thinking that Lazlo's familiarity with Colin means Colin cannot feed off of him, and Colin is torn on whether or not this is a good thing.

Yeah, I was wondering if inviting Colin to the hang out was going to cause a rift between them, since Laszlo seems to actually like Sean, and Colin doesn't ever seem to "turn off" his feeding. I thought Laszlo was going to get mad at Colin for turning a night out with the boys into a feeding frenzy, but it clearly went another way.

[Phishbulb]

On 9/26/2021 at 9:48 PM, sistermagpie said:

For me it wasn't specifically that I remember him being shown attracted to men, but that I had no recollection of him being attracted to women, so that didn't figure into my understanding of his reaction to The Guide.

I thought that when he was in the "vampire hunter" group that he showed romantic interest in the girl that was in the group? But maybe I'm mis-remembering things. 

[Eliza422]

As with all the episodes, this one gets better and better with subsequent viewings. There is just so much detail in there.

[MisterGlass]

On 9/28/2021 at 9:51 AM, Phishbulb said:

I thought that when he was in the "vampire hunter" group that he showed romantic interest in the girl that was in the group?

I think that was vampire Jenna's ex-roommate, who was telling the story of how Jenna disappeared.

[Bruinsfan]

If the show lasts for five seasons I expect Guillermo and Nandor to have somehow become married and perhaps adopted an orphan from some Third World country without Nandor ever realizing what's going on.

[bunnyblue]

I'm not really a fan of the Vampiric Council episodes, so this one didn't do much for me. It was a nice surprise to see Derek again and learn what happened to him. Poor guy has been without any vampire guidance, so it's not his fault he committed 'crimes' against the vampire community. So it seems he retained some of his humanity because he was drinking out of blood bank IV bags and kept his "hellhound" Astro the golden retriever. I'm glad Guillermo saved him twice from death.

I'm absolutely loving all the Laszlo & Colin Robinson interactions this season. Colin acting as Laszlo's paralegal - which consisted of googling a statute and not dissuading him from wearing the old lady wig to court - was gold. So Laszlo - who has not practiced law in 300 years and mostly represented himself, hogs, and horses - is shocked when his gibberish, insults, and overuse of "objection" results in him losing Sean's court case? I laughed at his incredulous "what the fuck?!" when the judge ruled against him. It was nice of Sean to not hold the courtroom failure against Laz. It seems the broship goes both ways with these 2.

Am I to understand that Laszlo drank alcohol? I thought consuming any kind of food or drink resulted in a vampire becoming violently ill? I seem to recall the Baron and Nadja both projectile vomiting when when they had food/drink. But Laz just seemed to be regular drunk and not sick at all.

Edited November 14, 2021 by bunnyblue

[coppersin]

On 11/14/2021 at 1:23 AM, bunnyblue said:

Am I to understand that Laszlo drank alcohol? I thought consuming any kind of food or drink resulted in a vampire becoming violently ill? I seem to recall the Baron and Nadja both projectile vomiting when when they had food/drink. But Laz just seemed to be regular drunk and not sick at all.

They don't drink alcohol, they can drink blood from people who have consumed alcohol though. Same concept as the drugs in season 1 IIRC. I haven't seen this episode since it aired, but didn't Sean say something like some drunk people left and Laszlo followed and came back drunk. I think Sean assumed they'd gone barhopping together but Laszlo just fed from them.

[cleo]

I didn't understand why Lazlo wouldn't just hypnotize the judge. Ask for a sidebar and do it . That was 100% what I was expecting.

I think this ep was the weakest of the season for me. 

Jenna was a lot funnier than Derek. 

[belial71]

Did you notice the reference to Aleister Crowley''s“Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law,”. I found that bit quite interesting and enriching from the amazing scriptwriters of the show!