S06.E08: First Look: All Shook Up

[greekmom]

Quote

Elizabeth and Andrei deal with the aftermath of the boat fiasco; Natalie loses her temper with Mike's mom; Kalani and Asuelu spice things up; Angela explores an unconventional way to quit smoking; Brandon finally challenges his parents.

 

[Persnickety1]

I watched the entire episode last night courtesy of Discovery+, so I'm not sure what was covered in the First Look.  Thus, I will put this under a spoiler.  

 

Spoiler

I now know more about the sexy times of Kalani and Asuelo than I ever, ever wanted to.  Not enough ear or brain bleach in the world to rid my mind of these disturbing images.  

Load up on your preferred beverage to watch their scenes...but I'd advise avoiding snacks until the Kalani and Asuelo scenes are done.  🤢

 

And a message to TLC:

Edited June 12, 2021 by Persnickety1

[Gobi]

14 minutes ago, greekmom said:

Brandon finally challenges his parents.

To mudwrestling?

[greekmom]

Sorry I screwed up with the title. 

[Kid]

“Give her $5000 and send her back to the Ukraine.”

She deserves a whole hell of a lot more than that for sleeping with that piece of shit!

[Persnickety1]

12 minutes ago, Kid said:

“Give her $5000 and send her back to the Ukraine.”

She deserves a whole hell of a lot more than that for sleeping with that piece of shit!

Mother Mike is hell bent on getting her out of Mike's life.  

Natalie might be off her nut, but that doesn't negate the fact that "Mikey" and "Mommy" are total assholes.  

On a personal note, Natalie's a better person than I am.  After finding out that wretched heifer tried to get a neighbor to stop my wedding, I'd have avoided her like the festering boil on the ass of humanity that she is.  

Spoiler

Am I the only one looking forward to seeing Natalie on The Single Life, unleashing her particular brand of crazy onto random men she meets?  Sounds like snark heaven 😂

 

[Kid]

Ok!  Who thinks Angela is only smoking the number of cigarettes she tells the doctor she is smoking??  *crickets*  *crickets* *crickets*

I smoked.  1000 is not enough and 1 is too many. 

[Frozendiva]

Maybe there needs to be a Mike’s mom and Natalie’s mom summit.

Whether Trish likes Natalie or not, she needs to respect her son marrying who he wants to. She has been awful all along. Natalie may be nutty and overly dramatic, but she is right. Her mother in law is not helpful and not respectful. $5000 isn’t much but I would get out.she was right to throw the ring back.

I don’t need to hear about Asuelu’s sausage and donuts. I had barely finished dinner. Why was the adult store hidden? Some secret stuff?Some mainstream stores are now selling some toys and personal massage devices. The staff doesn’t judge as they have probably seen it all. I do prefer the online ordering even though it is nice to touch things.

I think Libby and Andrei and the dog were on. Nothing memorable.

[HorrrGoodnight]

Wow, a romantic getaway and Kalani didn't have to bring the kids.....except Asuelu of course. Maybe I'm just a certified freak but the degree of  shock and amazement in the sex shop was a bit much. 

[CrazyInAlabama]

In anticipation of Sunday's entire episode, I'm replacing my TV remote batteries, so the mute button doesn't fail me for Kalani, and Asuelu getting frisky after going to the Adult Toy store.    

[Gobi]

How many times have we seen a visit to a sex shop? David and Annie, definitely, and I think Baby Girl Lisa. Maybe Rebecca, too?  At one of them there was the immortal line, “What do I know? I sell dildoes for a living.”

Edited June 12, 2021 by Gobi

[mamadrama]

I watched the whole episode. Not sure what was on the First Look so I'll be vague-ish. 

Brandon stood up to his parents and STILL looked like a dumbass. I was cheering Ron on. "You've never even paid a water bill!"

Mother Mike can suck an egg. You know that #Hookergate was caught on camera, though. TLC better show it on the Tell Nothing. 

Angela? Ugh. I AM starting to wonder if Mykul has a sidepiece, though.

Kalani was being a bitch about the location. Aseulu tried. He probably didn't know about her past experiences with cabins. Dude barely seems to understand her when she talks. Him talking to the receptionist started out cringey but then had me laughing. 

I was with my boyfriend's sister the first time I went to a sex shop. It was some huge place in Orlando. It was weird because although she was an adult at the time, I'd known her since she was a toddler. 

While I do believe Family Libby hates each other, I think their antics are scripted by them. I went from not liking Andrei at all to hoping he DOES take all their jobs. 

Brandon and Julia were brats. Eat some fucking cake and shut up. You can yell at Mommy and Daddy later. 

2 hours ago, Kid said:

Ok!  Who thinks Angela is only smoking the number of cigarettes she tells the doctor she is smoking??  *crickets*  *crickets* *crickets*

I smoked.  1000 is not enough and 1 is too many. 

I do wish the doctors would help her. Telling an addict just to stop their addictive behavior isn't helpful. My husband smoked since he was 14. He tried to quit many times over the years and he just couldn't do it on his own. He needed medical intervention. 

[Opine]

1 hour ago, Frozendiva said:

Maybe there needs to be a Mike’s mom and Natalie’s mom summit.

Whether Trish likes Natalie or not, she needs to respect her son marrying who he wants to. She has been awful all along. Natalie may be nutty and overly dramatic, but she is right. Her mother in law is not helpful and not respectful. $5000 isn’t much but I would get out.she was right to throw the ring back.

I don’t need to hear about Asuelu’s sausage and donuts. I had barely finished dinner. Why was the adult store hidden? Some secret stuff?Some mainstream stores are now selling some toys and personal massage devices. The staff doesn’t judge as they have probably seen it all. I do prefer the online ordering even though it is nice to touch things.

I think Libby and Andrei and the dog were on. Nothing memorable.

Mike and Natalie should start behaving like grown-ass adults and leave their mommies out of it.

The adult store was likely hidden by law.  Kalani said it was the only one around.  Aren't they in Utah?

[ALittleShelfish]

3 hours ago, Gobi said:

How many times have we seen a visit to a sex shop? David and Annie, definitely, and I think Baby Girl Lisa. Maybe Rebecca, too?  At one of them there was the immortal line, “What do I know? I sell dildoes for a living.”

Laura before she went to embarrass herself to Alla-din.  

That line is classic.  One of my favorite tv lines I can remember.  

[magemaud]

3 hours ago, CrazyInAlabama said:

In anticipation of Sunday's entire episode, I'm replacing my TV remote batteries, so the mute button doesn't fail me for Kalani, and Asuelu getting frisky after going to the Adult Toy store.   

and Kalani and Asuelu are also going to replace the batteries in their new toys! If they weren't in a sex shop, I would have mistaken that feathered wand as a cat toy. Well, I guess it is for a pussy...

[renatae]

Trish and Mike. Flagrant gaslighters of the year. "What did she say that was disrespectful?" Better question, what did she say that wasn't? Mike trying to make Natalie the troublemaker makes me stabby, while Trish playing Miss Innocent 2021 is barf-worthy. I'm sure that's not the first time Trish had told Mike to give Natalie $5000 and put her on the plane. That displayed her entire stank attitude in a nutshell.

Give her $50000 for putting up with your hateful selves. And a week at the spa.

I really don't need to see any more Sex Shop Follies. Enough, already.

[mamadrama]

10 hours ago, Frozendiva said:

Why was the adult store hidden? Some secret stuff?Some mainstream stores are now selling some toys and personal massage devices. The staff doesn’t judge as they have probably seen it all. I do prefer the online ordering even though it is nice to touch things.

Because in some jurisdictions they're literally illegal. And in others there are laws about what can be sold, where the items are located within the store, and what the signage looks like. 

Adult bookstores or sex shops are not allowed in my county. Neither is alcohol of any kind. We're dry. 

[Frozendiva]

22 minutes ago, mamadrama said:

Because in some jurisdictions they're literally illegal. And in others there are laws about what can be sold, where the items are located within the store, and what the signage looks like. 

Adult bookstores or sex shops are not allowed in my county. Neither is alcohol of any kind. We're dry. 

Interesting. Liquor stores everywhere here, weed stores, adult stores, etc.

[mamadrama]

2 hours ago, Frozendiva said:

Interesting. Liquor stores everywhere here, weed stores, adult stores, etc.

They're allowed in most states here, but there is no blanket permission for all of them when it comes to alcohol and adult stores. States control these things here and, within the state, counties (and even individual towns) decide on what they will or won't allow. The county beside me allows alcohol sales in restaurants but doesn't allow liquor stores. One on the other side allows sex shops but they can't be within 5 miles of a church or school. These things can be particularly strict in states, or in parts of states, that are very religious. 

[magemaud]

I don’t understand why Natalie didn’t just confront Trish with “you disrespected me when you called me a hooker!” and instead she sat there refusing to talk. That makes me suspicious that Trish said it in the first place since we didn’t see it on camera and can only take Natalie’s word for what happened. 

[mamadrama]

3 hours ago, magemaud said:

I don’t understand why Natalie didn’t just confront Trish with “you disrespected me when you called me a hooker!” and instead she sat there refusing to talk. That makes me suspicious that Trish said it in the first place since we didn’t see it on camera and can only take Natalie’s word for what happened. 

That's actually pissing me off.

I believe Trish said *something*. Whether that was, "You're talking like a hooker, "You're acting like a hooker," or "Can you get the rice cooker" is beyond me. 

[Gobi]

14 minutes ago, mamadrama said:

That's actually pissing me off.

I believe Trish said *something*. Whether that was, "You're talking like a hooker, "You're acting like a hooker," or "Can you get the rice cooker" is beyond me. 

“You’re quite the looker.”

”Do you play snooker?”

”Book her, Dano.”

”Filthy lucre.”

”The turkey? Nuke ‘er.”

”Don’t drink? Are you a puker?”

 

[mamadrama]

20 minutes ago, Gobi said:

“You’re quite the looker.”

”Do you play snooker?”

”Book her, Dano.”

”Filthy lucre.”

”The turkey? Nuke ‘er.”

”Don’t drink? Are you a puker?”

 

Or, per my Birmingham, UK father-in-law, "What a foo-kur!" 

[magemaud]

50 minutes ago, mamadrama said:

I believe Trish said *something*. Whether that was, "You're talking like a hooker, "You're acting like a hooker," or "Can you get the rice cooker" is beyond me. 

I wouldn't put it past Trish to say something like, "What kind of job do you expect to get here, a hooker?" (cackle, cackle, she thinks she's a riot) Then Trish and Mike agree that Natalie "misunderstands" a lot of what they say to her. At the same time she thought Natalie was qualified to be a translator? 

Edited June 13, 2021 by magemaud

[Hangin Out]

On 6/12/2021 at 11:19 AM, Persnickety1 said:

I watched the entire episode last night courtesy of Discovery+, so I'm not sure what was covered in the First Look.  Thus, I will put this under a spoiler.  

 

  Hide contents

I now know more about the sexy times of Kalani and Asuelo than I ever, ever wanted to.  Not enough ear or brain bleach in the world to rid my mind of these disturbing images.  

Load up on your preferred beverage to watch their scenes...but I'd advise avoiding snacks until the Kalani and Asuelo scenes are done.  🤢

 

And a message to TLC:

I just take anymore of Tiffany and Kalani.  Tiffany with the cold shoulder blouses, and Kalani with her dresses that look like tents.

[Hangin Out]

On 6/12/2021 at 11:23 AM, Gobi said:

To mudwrestling?

I’ve never seen two parents always butting in their kids business.  Now they want to plan another wedding.  STFU already.  I hope the kids go to Vegas ASAP.

[Hangin Out]

Never mind.

Edited June 14, 2021 by Hangin Out

[Adeejay]

I don’t believe Trish called Natalie a hooker, because if she did, TLC would have it running on a loop.  I think something was lost in translation.

Enough with Kalani and Asuelu and the sex talk. It’s cringey and I don’t believe anyone cares.

I felt bad for Brandon’s parents. Sometimes they don't listen, but I think they mean well. I thought it rude of Brandon and his wife to just walk out of the reception.  If they were living in my house, I would ask them to leave. 

[twinks]

and please....stop wearing off the shoulder tops.....thank you 🙄

[monagatuna]

22 hours ago, Frozendiva said:

Interesting. Liquor stores everywhere here, weed stores, adult stores, etc.

The adult stores here are female-friendly, LGBTQ welcoming, and ADA inclusive. They contribute to Planned Parenthood and RAINN. It's the most inclusive, sex-positive environment you could find yourself in. 

I seriously can't believe those doctors operated on Angela knowing she was just going to light up the minute she left the building.

[Texasmom1970]

I prefer Kalani and Asueli not speaking than having to hear about their nightmare inducing sex talk and awe at the sex toys.

I don't care how crazy she may be I still side with Natalie. Mike and his mullet Mom are grade A - assholes! They way he was singing to his Mom and petting her hair in the airport. Eww!

Pa Kettle sure does have a temper, maybe he needs to stop with the wine and go take a nap.

 

 

[Rebky]

You all - Andrrrrrrei was showing some serious gunnage tonight.  For the first time ever, I was thinking, "How YOU doing?" His wife looked like 10 miles of bad country road however. 

Edited June 14, 2021 by Rebky

[renatae]

That cabin wasn't tooooo bad. I used to go to summer camp every year. We had one room log cabins with electric lights only. The restrooms were about a 10 to 15 minute walk away, as was the dining lodge, and everywhere else we needed to go. Lots and lots of walking.

Every year we had to spend about 24 hours in small tents we had to pitch, dig latrines, and cook in the campfire we made. Specialty of the house, raw "baked" potatoes which never became fully cooked no matter what.

If Kalani 's cabins were like the ones Asuelu rented, she was privileged!

[Alonzo Mosely FBI]

IDK if you all were "treated" (sarcasm font) on TLC to what Discovery + users were watching to hear that Ausuelo does not believe in masturbation (Kalani said the word I wondered if that would make it past the TLC censors)  and has the expectation Kalani must meet his needs should he have them. Worse,  she does so.  She is such a child . 1) Any man who says they don't self pleasure is a liar 2) she has heard vibrators are good and some of her friends have them and doesn't have one ? Omg Kalan really? At 30? She needs to take charge of her life and her own sexual health and tell Ausuelo she is more than a milking machine and more than his go to for his needs. 

Grow up girl. And wear a seat belt when you're wedged in the backseat between your kids. Always wear a SEAT BELT. JFC. Mormon teenage years indeed. They're still here. 

Edited June 14, 2021 by Alonzo Mosely FBI

[Burning Rubber]

I was very entertained by Natalie's savagely sarcastic speech to Shrugs and Trasha about telling every little thing to mommy, listening to mommy and doing what mommy says.

Just like Mike does.

I rewound and watched this delectable TV moment a second time.

Edited June 14, 2021 by Burning Rubber

[Kid]

14 hours ago, magemaud said:

I wouldn't put it past Trish to say something like, "What kind of job do you expect to get here, a hooker?" (cackle, cackle, she thinks she's a riot) Then Trish and Mike agree that Natalie "misunderstands" a lot of what they say to her. At the same time she thought Natalie was qualified to be a translator? 

VERY GOOD point!!!  Very good.

[greekmom]

Let's get the elephant out of the room - the sex talk between Kalani and Asuelu was cringe - so cringe.  The whole bringing the kids and mom so Kalani can breast feed was TLC storyline at best. They dropped them off at the cabin and then drove to their cabin. So what is Kalani suppose to do ? Get up at 4 am after pleasuring Asuelu (because he doesn't take himself in hand) and drive to breast feed the kids?  Yeah, TLC shenanigan.

Mommy Trish did say something to Natalie.  But regardless of 'Hookergate', Trish (and Mike) was a nasty bitch to Natalie all weekend.  

I don't care about Andrei, Libby, etc. as its all fake for TLC.

Angela quitting smoking is a joke at best.  Hard thing to do but she's not even putting an effort in. She goes out for one last ciggie before her session with the hypnotist?!

If Betty was a bit nicer to Julia, I am sure Julia would have grinned and went through with the party with Brandon.  Ron berating his son how he can't stand on his own two feet is the worst case of parenting I've seen on the show - and we've had the likes of Mother Debbie, Mother Trish, Mother Chantal, etc.  Any parent would have said, "Good luck son. If you need anything, call me. Door is open if you two need to come back - your room is here."

 

[Burning Rubber]

It was wrong of Brandon and Julia to walk out of Ragin'Ron's 70th birthday party and humiliate Ron and Betty in front of the other car dealership employees, swingers, and various distant relatives that haven't shunned them out yet. It was just a few sad folding tables, plastic chairs and dollar store balloons, my God, they could have stuck around for the potato salad and white bread ham sandwiches, pretended to enjoy themselves and thank Betty for her efforts THEN MOVE THE HELL OUT.

There was no point in making them upset in front of all their relations.

Betty did welcome Julia like a daughter, sticking her with filthy farm chores is a testament to that.

Brandon needs to experience life outside the hoard of cute animals and kitchen crickets. Julia will be good for him that way.

[OFDgal]

7 hours ago, Texasmom1970 said:

.I don't care how crazy she may be I still side with Natalie. Mike and his mullet Mom are grade A - assholes! They way he was singing to his Mom and petting her hair in the airport. Eww!

.

 

 

Eww is right.  Mother was hugging Mike like he was a hero going off to war.  Mike patting her head was revolting.  I literally left the room during the sex talking by Aseulo.  Kalani and Aseulo have nothing to offer so TLC highlights their sex life.  I'm sure if we took a poll on this board that 100% would vote to have this couple off our screens.  

[Baltimore Betty]

23 minutes ago, greekmom said:

Angela quitting smoking is a joke at best.  Hard thing to do but she's not even putting an effort in. She goes out for one last ciggie before her session with the hypnotist?!

There is a very nice rehab center in Havre de Grace MD, there are lots of empty bottles left at the door everyday, getting that one last drink or ciggie is a mental thing but addicts relapse and Angela does not have the resolve to quit, she will have lots of "one last ciggies."

I noticed a lighter next to Angela on the sofa when she was on the video call with her doctor.

[Alonzo Mosely FBI]

Was anyone else screaming at the tv YOU KNOW WHY at Mike? She told him the night before Trasha (love that nickname BTW) called her a hooker and Natalie and Mike had a whole convo about that. HE KNEW WHY.  And he is all veins popping out screaming at her cornered in the backseat to SAY WHY. That was ugly. And abusive. And threatening. He knew why. 

His relationship with his mother is some next level sick shit. I actually think this tops Coltee and Mother Debbie and that's saying something.

[steff13]

What is Natalie's career?  She said Trish wants her to give it up to become an interpreter, but I'm not sure what she does.  

ETA:  I just answered my own question.  She was a journalist?  

Edited June 14, 2021 by steff13

[Polliwollidoodle]

8 hours ago, monagatuna said:

 

I seriously can't believe those doctors operated on Angela knowing she was just going to light up the minute she left the building.

I still can't believe that.

[Gobi]

8 minutes ago, steff13 said:

What is Natalie's career?  She said Trish wants her to give it up to become an interpreter, but I'm not sure what she does.  

ETA:  I just answered my own question.  She was a journalist?  

She acted on some crime shows in Ukraine (at least three). You can find clips from them on YouTube. Yara was on TV in Ukraine, too.

[Pepper Mostly]

On 6/12/2021 at 2:21 PM, Gobi said:

How many times have we seen a visit to a sex shop? David and Annie, definitely, and I think Baby Girl Lisa. Maybe Rebecca, too?  At one of them there was the immortal line, “What do I know? I sell dildoes for a living.”

And Tania, judiciously selecting vibrators. She's a discerning consumer of adult toys! 

"visit to a sex shop" is one of Matt Sharp's half dozen plot ideas. Along with "foreign finance has shady past" ,"visit to parents to ask for blessing", "visit coffee shop to talk to sassy/skeptical friend", and of course the piece de resistance, "visit to bridal shop to try on wedding dresses".

 

1 hour ago, greekmom said:

If Betty was a bit nicer to Julia, I am sure Julia would have grinned and went through with the party with Brandon.  Ron berating his son how he can't stand on his own two feet is the worst case of parenting I've seen on the show - and we've had the likes of Mother Debbie, Mother Trish, Mother Chantal, etc.  Any parent would have said, "Good luck son. If you need anything, call me. Door is open if you two need to come back - your room is here."

Betty can't be nicer to Julia because she appears to be incapable of empathy. She kept bleating "I did something nice for you!" Even though she was told repeatedly that a party was not what they wanted. Her version of "nice" is doing what Betty wants. 

Ron is just a terrible person. What kind of father belittles and debases his son in that way? "You are an idiot! You are incapable of the most basic life skills! You are so stupid you don't even know what things cost! How dare you think that you could be able to live on you own, you pathetic, stupid loser!" With his red face and bulging eyeballs I thought he was going to stroke out. 

Ron and Betty should look in a mirror. If their son is a bumbling blithering idiot they bear some responsibility for that. 

And why the absolute panic at that thought that their 28 year old, married son might get a place of his own? 

37 minutes ago, Alonzo Mosely FBI said:

Was anyone else screaming at the tv YOU KNOW WHY at Mike? She told him the night before Trasha (love that nickname BTW) called her a hooker and Natalie and Mike had a whole convo about that. HE KNEW WHY.  And he is all veins popping out screaming at her cornered in the backseat to SAY WHY. That was ugly. And abusive. And threatening. He knew why. 

His relationship with his mother is some next level sick shit. I actually think this tops Coltee and Mother Debbie and that's saying something.

Mike and his mother are just vomit inducing.  I agree, they make Debbie look like Donna Reed. 

[French Fries]

As it stands, I think I will watch this show through Pillow Talk only, moving forward. 2 hours is way too much of these people. It says a lot that I can only watch it when I am drinking.

[steff13]

12 minutes ago, Gobi said:

She acted on some crime shows in Ukraine (at least three). You can find clips from them on YouTube. Yara was on TV in Ukraine, too.

I actually saw her a couple days ago on one of those "bad photoshop" lists they have on FB.  

[Rebky]

1 hour ago, Baltimore Betty said:

There is a very nice rehab center in Havre de Grace MD, there are lots of empty bottles left at the door everyday, getting that one last drink or ciggie is a mental thing but addicts relapse and Angela does not have the resolve to quit, she will have lots of "one last ciggies."

I noticed a lighter next to Angela on the sofa when she was on the video call with her doctor.

She has a total lack of self discipline if she has to resort to major surgery to lose weight. Mikul, America is not worth putting up with her. Find yourself a local lovely girl and you will be so much happier. Trust me on this.

[Hangin Out]

25 minutes ago, Pepper Mostly said:

.  Any parent would have said, "Good luck son. If you need anything, call me. Door is open if you two need to come back - your room is here

So my Son went thru a divorce and was left with practically nothing.  We told him he had a room with us until he got straightened out.  We didn’t ask for money, but he does things in the house that my husband can’t do anymore.  Lots of things.  It’s a win/win for both of us.  If parents don’t help, who will?  He’s our kid and a hard worker.

[Rebky]

58 minutes ago, Gobi said:

She acted on some crime shows in Ukraine (at least three). You can find clips from them on YouTube. Yara was on TV in Ukraine, too.

And don't forget her pivotal role of Natasha in the Rocky and Bullwinkle series!

Edited June 14, 2021 by Rebky