S11.E06: I See Red Flags

[Boo Boo]

11 minutes ago, essexjan said:

She definitely has the hall marks of becoming an Olympic-class nag, and she seems to have rigid routines in relation to seeing friends and family. But, on the other hand, I understand that she wants someone to do things with - go to movies, restaurants, on trips, etc. Brett is definitely not that person. He won't want to (or be able to) pick up the tab for expensive dinners, and she'll start to resent him if she ends up paying more than him for their social life, notwithstanding the discrepancy in their salaries.

 

I didn't get the impression from Brett that's he's not going to pick up a tab and isn't going to want to do anything.  

I get the impression Brett lives within his means.  He doesn't need to be on the go constantly like Olivia apparently does.

Olivia makes a nice salary, but the way she talks about luxury, I would have thought she's the CEO in health care.  She isn't.  If she wants the high life, maybe she needs to get on Sugardaddy.com instead of going on MAFs.  Not wanting to spend a boatload of dough on expensive wine is not the character flaw she seems to think it is.

I bet he's got a much healthier bank account.

 

 

[JapMo]

2 minutes ago, humbleopinion said:

Brett is never going to want to eat fancy, drink fancy, dress fancy enough for Olivia.

Brett likes his routine...Get up early to get in a workout, go to his secure government job, get off at 4pm , hit the gym, go home, make dinner, do chores, get another Light workout, play with Tyrion, internet time then bed.
He is a homebody who cooks for himself.

You got all that from watching him a few minutes each week, huh?

[Boo Boo]

4 minutes ago, humbleopinion said:

Brett is never going to want to eat fancy, drink fancy, dress fancy enough for Olivia.

Brett likes his routine...Get up early to get in a workout, go to his secure government job, get off at 4pm , hit the gym, go home, make dinner, do chores, get another Light workout, play with Tyrion, internet time then bed.
He is a homebody who cooks for himself.

His entertainment is internet and app dating and bedding willing women as a way to get over his failed engagement.

No judgement on Brett.

Yeah, they are two different people.

I guess I'm passing judgment on Olivia because the way she talks about luxury I would think she'd be in a much higher income bracket then she is.  I also felt that she got off on making him feel small as though she's taking all of her failed relationships where she felt small out on Brett.

[cinsays]

38 minutes ago, Boo Boo said:

Olivia is an asshole about money.  Talking about enjoying nice things as if she's Bill Gates. I mean she makes a nice living bit she ain't rich.  Yes, you want a responsible guy but he has a house, a job, seems to live nicely.  

in general, she seems to think quite highly of herself.  

 

 

 

I agree.  I was in Olivia's corner but this episode has me thinking she's lying to herself if she thinks she is ok with a man who makes less. Not crazy about Brett, but he makes an ok living, is saving for the future and likes to stay home and cook instead of blowing all his money on expensive wine and trips. 

And if the girls were going to go sit at another table and chat about their experiences and do the stupid rating thing, maybe put them a bit further away from the guys' table? I would have been hurt to hear myself get rated so low too. 

She has no time for a husband or family, so maybe she just needs a pal to go do things with when she can fit him into her schedule.

[Boo Boo]

Christina harping on him not giving a marriage rating has to be producer manipulation.  

[Boo Boo]

I loved the scene with Bennett and Amelia in bed where she's falling asleep and he gently wakes her back up and laughs about it.  They are so cute.

[Boo Boo]

Is this the friend she has to Factetime every day? Maybe Olivia should be in a relationship with her.  

13 hours ago, Mercolleen said:

"You'll always be perfect just as long as we never meet again."

That is actually a great line that Amelia wrote.

It was!  She's very talented!

[Boo Boo]

13 hours ago, ShowFan said:

“It’s a massive turn on that you’re loaded!” Omg I’m dying! I will say that I loved Brett’s jokes and sense of humor in this episode so far (only watched through his convo with Olivia on how he fits into her life ..the rest DVR for tomorrow). I see him in a different light here (still an asshole but a funny one) and I do see her as more rigid. 
 

Henry is also showing his fun side! Quite the character and becoming very likable. Christina is getting on the bad side of the producers. 
 

Karen rocking an awesome bod! Still super low energy for me and boring. 
 

Amani is truly a queen! I loved how she stabbed Brett with “don’t wink at me, it’s not cute!” She is the kind of woman that every man should aspire to have by his side. Beautiful, strong, honest and loyal  

Bennett and Amelia are super adorable and have the deepest most intelligent conversations on getting to know each other. Her guitar song was lovely!

 

 

I think Brett was generally trying to joke his way out of his embarrassment.  I mean, Olivia basically income-shamed him.  And seemed to really enjoy it.

[bichonblitz]

So how much does Brett earn? 30, 40, 50K? How much does Olivia earn? 90, 120, 150K? Inquiring minds want to know. 

I swear before the marriage Olivia said she worked long hours, came home, exercised on her sad little stationary bike and didn't do much of anything else. It didn't sound like she goes out much. She also had a small apt. for such a successful high earning person that likes the finer things in life. Am I mistaking her for one of the others? 

Brett can stop with his single dude persona but I do think he's funny. He has a good sense of humor which Olivia doesn't get at all. I also think he was never attracted to Olivia from the get but he decided to make the most of what he got himself in to with the show and ride it out as best as he can unlike some others from the past who came out of the gate hating and wanting out. 

Edited August 20, 2020 by bichonblitz

[Elizzikra]

11 hours ago, Yeah No said:

Granted that Karen is Miss Superiority and is hung up on masculinity, and I certainly think it's commendable for Miles to be open about something as serious as clinical depression (although he could have picked a better time after the honeymoon).  I've had that myself and it's no joke.  But all that said, he claims he was diagnosed two years ago and is still taking medication.  A bout of clinical depression on the average lasts about 9 months.  After two years, we're talking chronic depression, and that's a HUGE red flag.  Again with me and my Master's in Psychology talking, but if a guy I only just met said that to me I'd be looking for the door, seriously.  I feel sorry for the guy, but the way he acted was like he was diagnosed and now it's a lifelong illness, which is very unhealthy.  I would not want to be married to someone with that issue.  I can't believe the show allowed him to be matched with anyone.  I know that sounds harsh, but seriously I wouldn't want to be signed on to deal with someone with that problem.  That's a big deal and not something you can work through so easily with someone you only just met.

I have clinical depression and I have been on medication for years. I fully anticipate taking it for the rest of my life and I'm fine with that. For many people, it's a lifelong illness and can be well-controlled with medication. I'm happily married and quite stable and even keel. I told my husband early on in our dating but if I hadn't, I don't know that he would know there's anything "wrong" with me.

Miles didn't strike me as unhealthy at all. He was having an issue; he sought help and he is working a treatment plan that seems quite effective. I wouldn't be worried about that at all. Not only that, he's using his personal experience to be a resource for other men who are struggling. I think his experience makes him a more empathetic husband, friend and potential father. MSW speaking here, for what it's worth.

[Boo Boo]

1 minute ago, Elizzikra said:

I have clinical depression and I have been on medication for years. I fully anticipate taking it for the rest of my life and I'm fine with that. For many people, it's a lifelong illness and can be well-controlled with medication. I'm happily married and quite stable and even keel. I told my husband early on in our dating but if I hadn't, I don't know that he would know there's anything "wrong" with me.

Miles didn't strike me as unhealthy at all. He was having an issue; he sought help and he is working a treatment plan that seems quite effective. I wouldn't be worried about that at all. Not only that, he's using his personal experience to be a resource for other men who are Estruggling. I think his experience makes him a more empathetic husband, friend and potential father. MSW speaking here, for what it's worth.

Exactly.  What Miles did should be the definition of masculinity:  He bravely confronted his mental health and he took control.  Fuck Karen and everyone else that sees this as a weakness.

[Neurochick]

11 hours ago, Yeah No said:

Of course they deserve love, but to be matched with a stranger a huge issue like that is only going to make things all the harder because it can negatively impact their relationship from ever getting off the ground.  It's not the same as being matched with a diabetic or something like that because of that.  A chronic illness that's under control is one thing but something that affects your moods and hence your ability to relate to your significant others is a huge load to put on someone that didn't sign on for that kind of role.  If you meet someone and fall in love with them and are willing to accept their issues and conditions, great, go get married, but to be married and involuntarily signed on to deal with chronic depression from the start is a huge load and one that would be difficult enough if they already knew and liked each other, but even huger and more prone to failure in this situation.  And it can be unhealthy and a sign that getting involved with him will not be easy.  Not all chronic depressives are completely successfully treated.  It looks to me like the focus will be on him and his "moods" and she is not looking for a project.  I just don't think it was a good idea to match him with that issue with her.  I was so hoping he was as good as he seemed at first but little by little I am getting disappointed.

Here's the thing though.  What if you get married to someone and that person contracts a serious illness, mental or otherwise.  Do you bail? 

I realize that he knew before getting matched, but sometimes people don't know.  What then?

[Neurochick]

This is what Karen thinks of herself.

 

Okay sis, the last man you dated had a baby by another woman WHILE he was with you.  Now Miles has mental health issues.  The older you get, the more issues a guy is going to have.  There's no such thing as prince charming and if Karen thinks that she "deserves better" or the perfect guy is waiting for her, she doesn't need marriage, she needs therapy.

Edited August 20, 2020 by Neurochick

[humbleopinion]

46 minutes ago, JapMo said:

You got all that from watching him a few minutes each week, huh?

Feel free to disagree.

[Boo Boo]

17 minutes ago, bichonblitz said:

So how much does Brett earn? 30, 40, 50K? How much does Olivia earn? 90, 120, 150K? Inquiring minds want to know. 

I swear before the marriage Olivia said she worked long hours, came home, exercised on her sad little stationary bike and didn't do much of anything else. It didn't sound like she goes out much. She also had a small apt. for such a successful high earning person that likes the finer things in life. Am I mistaking her for one of the others? 

Brett can stop with his single dude persona but I do think he's funny. He has a good sense of humor which Olivia doesn't get at all. I also think he was never attracted to Olivia from the get but he decided to make the most of what he got himself in to with the show and ride it out as best as he can unlike some others from the past who came out of the gate hating and wanting out. 

That's exactly right. The first episode, Olivia made it sound she was basically a cat lady homebody looking for the same thing.  Suddenly she's this glamorous world traveler that can't drink $20  bottle of wines.  Like I said in the last episode post, I don't feel like we're seeing her authentic self.  I feel like she got the impression that Brett wasn't into her so now she's playing that role of I demand luxury because I'm just such a high earner and sooooo adventurous.

[Cammi]

50 minutes ago, cinsays said:

I agree.  I was in Olivia's corner but this episode has me thinking she's lying to herself if she thinks she is ok with a man who makes less. Not crazy about Brett, but he makes an ok living, is saving for the future and likes to stay home and cook instead of blowing all his money on expensive wine and trips. 

And if the girls were going to go sit at another table and chat about their experiences and do the stupid rating thing, maybe put them a bit further away from the guys' table? I would have been hurt to hear myself get rated so low too. 

She has no time for a husband or family, so maybe she just needs a pal to go do things with when she can fit him into her schedule.

I don't get why everyone is saying a "7" is low? It is out of 10 correct? So a 10 is an A+, 9=A, 8=A- or maybe B, and a 7 would be a B. Low to me would be a 5 or less. If someone rated another a 7 on a looks scale, I would think they're above average looking... 

Is my math worse than everyone else? Am I missing something? A 7 is above average to me. A 6 would've made me cringe slightly, but a 7 is pretty solid imo

Edited August 20, 2020 by Cammi

[Elizzikra]

Quote

I just want to say for the record that I'm not saying that chronic depressives can't make good relationship partners, they can. But being married to one at first sight that you don't even know is going to be able to function or cope with a relationship let alone marriage is fraught with potential peril.  Miles might turn out to be a great guy with his condition under control but we don't know that yet and neither does the show, really.  At this point it is a red flag, like the episode title suggests, but it isn't necessarily a relationship killer.  It would scare me, though, if on day two or 3 or whatever of knowing someone I just married I suddenly found out about it.  And with good reason.

That is the whole premise of this show. There are a million things that might mean that someone isn't going to be able to function or cope with relationship/marriage, not all of them with a medical diagnosis attached - the most common on this show seems to be general asshattedness. I just don't agree that well-managed depression is among them. If Miles is on meds (which he said he was) he is seeing a physician regularly. He is articulate about his diagnosis and actively participating in a treatment plan. He is one of millions of people in the US who take medication for depression and lead "normal," healthy and productive lives. If people want to call it a red flag, fine. But if that's a red flag, every single person on the planet has a "red flag."

Quote

Of course they deserve love, but to be matched with a stranger a huge issue like that is only going to make things all the harder because it can negatively impact their relationship from ever getting off the ground.  It's not the same as being matched with a diabetic or something like that because of that.  A chronic illness that's under control is one thing but something that affects your moods and hence your ability to relate to your significant others is a huge load to put on someone that didn't sign on for that kind of role.  If you meet someone and fall in love with them and are willing to accept their issues and conditions, great, go get married, but to be married and involuntarily signed on to deal with chronic depression from the start is a huge load and one that would be difficult enough if they already knew and liked each other, but even huger and more prone to failure in this situation.  And it can be unhealthy and a sign that getting involved with him will not be easy.  Not all chronic depressives are completely successfully treated.  It looks to me like the focus will be on him and his "moods" and she is not looking for a project.  I just don't think it was a good idea to match him with that issue with her.  I was so hoping he was as good as he seemed at first but little by little I am getting disappointed.

I totally disagree. Nothing Miles said last night makes him less "good" than he initially seemed. I admire so much about him, including and especially how he has taken this aspect of his life and used it to make him an even better person.

[Soup333]

I would say I'm surprised at the vitriol surrounding Olivia but I'm really not. She basically said she works hard for her money and likes to enjoy it. So what? She works a lot and wants to treat herself to nice things. How is that wrong? Brett is cool with his 8-4 and drinking cheap wine with his cat by his side. Okay? They differ in this area and it's a big deal for her. This doesn't make her a bitch. At all. 

Being in a relationship with someone who doesn't make as much as you and then having to pay for any plans you make is exhausting. As Erykah Badu sang, "Every time we go somewhere, I gotta reach down in my purse to pay your way and your homeboys way and sometimes your cousin's way." That shit is tiring. 

Now, one thing Olivia could do is see if they could compromise about some things. What if they discussed saving/investing his income and living off hers once they moved in together? Of course that arrangement is only worth serious consideration if they were to make it through the experiment, which I'm betting they won't.

Also, Brett was being intentionally obtuse in their conversation about what plans he had for when they returned home. Bet if Amani had asked Woody what plans he had, he'd have had a list as long as my arm about things he wanted to do/show/experience with her.

[Boo Boo]

8 minutes ago, Cammi said:

I don't get why everyone is saying a "7" is low? It is out of 10 correct? So a 10 is an A+, 9=A, 8=A- or maybe B, and a 7 would be a B. Low to me would be a 5 or less. If someone rated another a 7 on a looks scale, I would think they're above average looking... 

Is my math worse than everyone else? Am I missing something? A 7 is above average to me. A 6 would've made me cringe slightly, but a 7 is pretty solid imo

I agree.  I also think that was a bit of producer manipulation to make it look like he was upset.  I think the reason Brett doesn't want to "rate" the marriage because he thinks of it as being lower than a 7.

 

[Boo Boo]

21 minutes ago, Soup333 said:

I would say I'm surprised at the vitriol surrounding Olivia but I'm really not. She basically said she works hard for her money and likes to enjoy it. So what? She works a lot and wants to treat herself to nice things. How is that wrong? Brett is cool with his 8-4 and drinking cheap wine with his cat by his side. Okay? They differ in this area and it's a big deal for her. This doesn't make her a bitch. At all. 

Being in a relationship with someone who doesn't make as much as you and then having to pay for any plans you make is exhausting. As Erykah Badu sang, "Every time we go somewhere, I gotta reach down in my purse to pay your way and your homeboys way and sometimes your cousin's way." That shit is tiring. 

Now, one thing Olivia could do is see if they could compromise about some things. What if they discussed saving/investing his income and living off hers once they moved in together? Of course that arrangement is only worth serious consideration if they were to make it through the experiment, which I'm betting they won't.

Also, Brett was being intentionally obtuse in their conversation about what plans he had for when they returned home. Bet if Amani had asked Woody what plans he had, he'd have had a list as long as my arm about things he wanted to do/show/experience with her.

I don't think Olivia is authentic, for one.  She was cat lady homebody until the honeymoon.  She may make more than him but she's far from rich.   People can drink expensive wine and travel on an IT salary.  His salary doesn't prevent him from traveling and drinking expensive wine.  For her to act as though HE can't afford that is fucking obnoxious.  Make no mistake about it:  she's not worrying about him paying the bills, she's basically saying he can't afford to do the things she can.  That's bullshit.

He could've easily shamed her back:  I drink cheap wine because putting $100 wines down my throat is a waste of money.  I'd rather put that money in the bank and live nicely in retirement.

Edited August 20, 2020 by Boo Boo

[Retired at last]

Just a few thoughts. . .

I thought ENOUGH with the toothbrushing and flossing!

Also, the constant use of the word "aggressive" bothers me - a lot. I would not want to be with anyone who is aggressive, and yet they keep using that word as if it is a good thing and want Henry to be more aggressive. How about "assertive" or "initiating" if that is what they are looking for? Aggressive is NOT a positive trait, unless you are maybe talking about being cut-throat in business.

I always fall asleep when this is on, but did record it. I usually read here to determine if I want to watch. Not sure that I do. I did see that weird conversation (and I agree that it was producer driven) between Olivia and Brett. I am glad that Olivia seems to have a nice support system so that she wasn't alone as a single. But, if she really thinks this relationship is going to work then she needs to compromise and focus on her husband. I agree with those who said they think she just wanted someone for her plus-one invitations and essentially, married someone to be her escort to the things SHE wants to do. I did not see the ratings segment, and I agree that it is not a good thing, but they have only known their spouses for 5 or 6 days. I don't see 7 as a horrible score at this point. But, if he has been doing all of his best things, then I can see where he would be disappointed. I am definitely getting very inflexible vibes from Olivia, especially since she now has the monetary power.

Looking forward to the tent and song with Amelia and Bennett. I do like them together.

I thought Henry was funny on those paddle  boards (except for using the word "widow") and I do kind of like him. She is just not a likable person. Obviously, this is not a good match, but she has pissed off the producers and will get the Brandon edit. Although, if they didn't exhibit those behaviors, they wouldn't have the film to show.

Karen is a beautiful woman who acts wayyyyyyy too old for 30. Miles still seems like a really good guy, but she won't give him a chance. No one is perfect, including her, so if she wants to really have a solid relationship, then she needs to understand that he needs to see affection, too. It is not up to him to woo her entirely.

I still don't like Amani's voice, but I think she and Woody are doing fine. That is all.

 

Edited August 20, 2020 by Retired at last

[Boo Boo]

1 minute ago, Retired at last said:

Karen is a beautiful woman who acts wayyyyyyy too old for 30. Miles still seems like a really good guy, but she won't give him a chance. No one is perfect, including her, so if she wants to really have a solid relationship, then she needs to understand that he needs to see affection, too. It is not up to him to woo her entirely.

 

 

I agree!  I've thought she was 40. I'm really hoping that "deception" comment in those previews is her true age coming out!

[ZaldamoWilder]

14 hours ago, Mercolleen said:

Does spending a week at an all-inclusive resort really count as international travel that broaden's one's horizons? 

I guess it depends entirely upon your definition of broadening, but I'm gone vote uh huh.  As unoriginal a destination as it sounds, on a vacation to Cancun, we visited Chichén Itzá.  I grew up in Paramus, New Jersey Coll, how's that for exotic? lol.  It wasn't my first international trip or first time in Mexico, but I stood in front of a piece of history thousands of years old.  As lovely as the dirty jerz is, ain't nobody flying here to see Atlantic City's boardwalk.  Anyhoo, we stayed at a boutique hotel off the strip that Olivia would adore called the Beloved, Playa Mujeres.  Now I know all inclusives have a cheeseball reputation, so Imma say this then shut all the way up.   The basis of my choice was that across the board, but especially for food, this place had unanimously higher guest ratings than the similarly priced a la carte Ritz-Carlton about a half an hour away.  I ramble but I wasn't certain if your point was that you can hardly call yourself a seasoned cosmopolitan traveler if your meals are prearranged lol.  It isn't what I'd call myself, I just didn't see the link 😉

 

14 hours ago, Jaclyn88 said:

Bretts annoying , but I thought Olivia was trying to pick a fight at dinner . She asked how much he makes and he told her , and she was like just to let you know I like to go out to eat a lot , spend A lot on vacations , buy expensive wine , buy nice things etc .. and he’s like i like cheap wine and I like to invest in something long term .. and she got pissy over it . I get that you don’t want someone who’s cheap and a tight wad , but I wouldn’t want to be with someone who always needs the most expensive , up to date stuff and I agree with him , some cheaper wines taste just as good ! 

I was so hoping he was gonna say something about 2 buck chuck or Harris-Teeter's house white.   Dammit Brett, get a blindfold and prove her wrong!  

14 hours ago, Soup333 said:

They’re unevenly yoked. She’s probably been in relationships where she’s made more money and then has felt like she has to dumb down her tastes or pay all the time. If a high income was a dealbreaker I can under why she’s upset that the experts ignored her wishes. 

Luke-Katie anyone?  She gone be alright because: married a stranger.  Now either make the compromise to make it work or live a single and hincty life calling ya mama from the helicopter.   

13 hours ago, humbleopinion said:

Unfiltered: Amani, Karen, Viv, JamieO
Amani and Karen look stylish.

Karen looks like a toddler in that big chair in her brown robe...those are ginormous chairs.

Brett’s efficiency in app dating is could have been conveyed to Olivia in a nicer way but Viv says Brett is all about the sheer numbers  so can’t be faulted. He’s a bag of dicks....too many to count.

Woody is knocking it out of the ballpark with Amani.

What I love about this is he said. He wasn't this dude.  Not a romancer, not a pull out the stops kind of guy but he's willing to go further to please his wife.  I said Woodrow! boy you better come and get your grown. ass. man. on!  yessssssss!!! 

 

13 hours ago, Yeah No said:

Granted that Karen is Miss Superiority and is hung up on masculinity, and I certainly think it's commendable for Miles to be open about something as serious as clinical depression (although he could have picked a better time after the honeymoon).  I've had that myself and it's no joke.  But all that said, he claims he was diagnosed two years ago and is still taking medication.  A bout of clinical depression on the average lasts about 9 months.  After two years, we're talking chronic depression, and that's a HUGE red flag.  Again with me and my Master's in Psychology talking, but if a guy I only just met said that to me I'd be looking for the door, seriously.  I feel sorry for the guy, but the way he acted was like he was diagnosed and now it's a lifelong illness, which is very unhealthy.  I would not want to be married to someone with that issue.  I can't believe the show allowed him to be matched with anyone.  I know that sounds harsh, but seriously I wouldn't want to be signed on to deal with someone with that problem.  That's a big deal and not something you can work through so easily with someone you only just met.

There were so many well articulated posts about this I really don't even want to touch it, except to say: girl if you're a bird I'm a bird.   5 years with my fiance, who I came to think, was a selfish asshole.  I didn't know it until year 5 but he had dysthymia (low level, persistent and long term depression).  So the diagnosis came after the love, however, I think it's even more multifaceted than: does she stay or does she go?  Now she knows, but what has he consistently decided to do since he's known?  What does their life look like if he says these side effects aren't cool, I'm finna flush these pills?  My dude was like nah I'm cool, I'm just gone decide to be in a good mood more often, no meds and no professional treatment.   As much as I like (wedding) cake, I said that's not how illness works boo, here's your ring.   I know what ya'll are saying about Karen's reaction.  She just might be a whole muffucah...........because she wasn't prepared to hear that.  And preparation and willingness is my point.  This isn't a 15 minute John Quinones segment, the experts ain't shit for that.  They needed to even if only hypothetically delve into the kind of person who would be equipped to work through the implications and consequences of Miles' admission.  It's not small.   Having said that, I really do like him, not necessarily her for him, but I like him and hope that he finds someone supportive.

12 hours ago, Empress1 said:

I don't know that persistent depressive disorder is unhealthy - I mean, if he has it, he has it. My friend is married to a man with bipolar disorder that he manages with therapy and medication, and he will need to do so for the rest of his life in the same way that anyone with a chronic illness needs to manage that illness. If that's what Miles is dealing with, that's part of the package. People who struggle with their mental health deserve love too. Miles seems to be handling his well - I liked what he said about knowing he was a responsibility to Karen to let her know how he's feeling.

And I think this is an instance where, even though they just met, it's a thing he needs to tell her early because if he doesn't, it looks like he was hiding it from her. I might have waited until after the honeymoon to disclose it, but I wouldn't have waited much longer (like, the first day or two after we're back).

I'm surprised that Brett makes that much less than Olivia. Nurse practitioners do well for themselves, especially if they're in certain specialties, but I think Brett is in IT and that can be lucrative too. If I had to guess, I would guess that Olivia makes just over six figures (like between $100 - $150K), so Brett might make $50K. I'd guess he lives check to check and she doesn't, which matters and is probably at the root of their different attitudes - he can't afford to spend the way she does, and if he has to choose between saving money and having fun, he prioritizes saving (what I think he was saying with "I prefer to invest" or whatever he said). Olivia can likely sock away money AND take trips and go out to eat. 

I did agree with Brett that if Olivia is on the phone with her mom and FaceTiming her best friend every day AND she has a demanding job, there might not be room for him and they should maybe look at that. Like, could she talk to them every other day, or for shorter periods of time each day while they prioritize getting to know each other?

I stopped watching this halfway through. I'll finish tomorrow.

This is pretty much all I wanted to say about Liv.  Her tastes and saving money are not mutually exclusive.  She (likely) makes 6 figures....in New Orleans..........with zero children.   Look.  I work in NYC so her salary isn't a grip here.  But if I made over 100K, in the south.........childless at thirtysomething....?  Ya'll? I'd be.....  

 

travel is my shit, food is my shit, comfy shit is my shit.  Don't @ me, I already said she gone need to compromise if she wanna keep Brett lol

12 hours ago, Yeah No said:

Karen thinks she's more mature than Miles but because she generally thinks she's all that it comes off poorly.  But truthfully I think Miles is showing his immaturity too.  I think there is something off about him telling her he's had 10 monogamous relationships.  Like does he think that the number being 10 makes him look better?  I can't believe that Karen and Amani both had the same opinion I voiced on this in last week's thread.  Like even when you do the math that's a LOT of relationships for someone his age!  How could that have been possible?  And how many of them were really all that serious?  Amani said she thought he was throwing people in there that he had only dated a few times.  Amani is a wise woman.  And all of this makes me question just how great a "catch" Miles really is.  Karen isn't opening up to him because she doesn't see him as on her level and she senses something "off" about comments like that.  And truthfully I don't know if I blame her completely.

LOL and here I was thinking that YOU articulated it much better!  😄

A whole body count.  We really doing that? 

The thing is I heard this oppositionally to his intent.  You 29, 31, whichever, with 10 monogamous relationships = you stick n' move.  I mean it could be every last one of them but don't keep these stats on your resume Miles lol. 

7 hours ago, gingerandcloves said:

Amelia and Bennett are the best. I really enjoy watching them, and that is such a rarity for this show. I love that they both have a lot of fun and are goofy together but still talk about serious issues.

Woody and Amani are adorable as well. Love how well-matched they seem so far. That dune buggy ride looked fun and kind of crazy. They're so cute and lovey-dovey.

Olivia and Brett - I cannot see them lasting long-term. They are just too fundamentally different. They remind me of Tom and Lily. And I just do not see Olivia as being the type to settle down, have kids and be a parent. I don't know how the heck she will have time for a husband when she seems to spend all her time either working or with her friends/mom. Brett was being an asshole though about rating the marriage. They both seem like they can be stubborn.

I feel for both Karen and Miles. As someone who does have life long mental issues, I know how important it is to be honest with your partner and to have someone who is supportive but can kick your butt when you need it. Good for Miles for being open about it and getting treatment. It's going to be difficult for Karen who already thought Miles was "too emotional" to accept that he might not always be the rock she wants. Hopefully she will allow herself some time to get to know him better and figure out if they can make this work. I still think they have a chance.

Oh, man, Henry and Christina. Christina is looking for anything from Henry, and he's not giving it to her. Is he not attracted to her, or is he just really that slow to make a move? I'd probably be a bit frustrated too if I were her. Like he doesn't even give her any compliments, and he couldn't come up with a fruit to describe her. She can be kind of bossy and impatient but he acts like a barely animated corpse.

I think he is attracted to her but the prospect of being physical is something that he'd find completely intimidating if bruh doesn't even know if/when he's flirting lol.    She's pleasing, {shrug}.  I can't WAIT until he gets her all the way together about how snappy she is and she retorts, well we could fix that if you'd just break me off!  Break her off, Hank!   

Amelia and Bennett - for me, there probably won't be another moment on television that is more 100% adorable than when Amelia's baby niece ran, arms open, to "Uncle Ben"  Jesus, my fallopians!   I love their genuine vibe, it looks as though along with whatever else they have, they could be best friends and I swear, I swoon that.   He need to wash his feet though, aside from fucking up my 1500 thread count, the implication that nothing else has been washed before you climb into bed with me?

 

 

 

Edited August 20, 2020 by ZaldamoWilder
typos is how you tell it's really me

[DrewPaul2010]

Amelia and Bennet

Most couples love each other...but liking each other is what makes a union fun. Even if their marriage goes down the tubes they will both say it was a great experience. It looks like the biggest troubles will be Amelia's profession which is going to be very demanding. I think they'll stick and work things out.

Amani and Woody

Could it be much better? Lets see where it goes when the rubber hits the road. I haven't heard too much serious talk about what life together will look for them.

Olivia and Brett

Going to take a lot of work to put these two dissimilar peas in a pod together. By sheer force and will power anyone can keep a marriage together no matter how awful it is but you hope to have a good marriage that is comforting. They are making a mistake if they think they can change each other even though they didn't pick each others its an as is where is proposition. I suspect Brett is a bit of a contrarian which explains some of his behavior. He could have given a far better answer and turned the tables. He should say Olivia and I learning about each other, enjoying each others company and we've had talks about communicating and our plans in the future. I'm happy where were at and if you wish to assign a numerical value to that go ahead.

Christina and Henry

Its odd that Christina has the time to worry about Olivia and Bretts marriage when her own marriage seems precarious at best (unless she's already moved on and just enjoying the ride). Brett was being contrarian not to answer the question but what business is it of hers to push it? Is she a licensed counselor?

Henry is becoming more likable. He really stretching himself throughout the whole process doing things he'd never do other wise and finding out there is fun to be had going outside the box. He seems to be getting more comfortable in his own skin. Its possible he isn't attracted to Christina but at the same time he doesn't want to hurt anyone's feelings.

Karen and Miles

These are two very low key people. Not sure where there romance is heading...

 

[Mercolleen]

17 minutes ago, ZaldamoWilder said:

I guess it depends entirely upon your definition of broadening, but I'm gone vote uh huh.  As unoriginal a destination as it sounds, on a vacation to Cancun, we visited Chichén Itzá.  I grew up in Paramus, New Jersey Coll, how's that for exotic? lol.  It wasn't my first international trip or first time in Mexico, but I stood in front of a piece of history thousands of years old.  As lovely as the dirty jerz is, ain't nobody flying here to see Atlantic City's boardwalk.  Anyhoo, we stayed at a boutique hotel off the strip that Olivia would adore called the Beloved, Playa Mujeres.  Now I know all inclusives have a cheeseball reputation, so Imma say this then shut all the way up.   The basis of my choice was that across the board, but especially for food, this place had unanimously higher guest ratings than the similarly priced a la carte Ritz-Carlton about a half an hour away.  I ramble but I wasn't certain if your point was that you can hardly call yourself a seasoned cosmopolitan traveler if your meals are prearranged lol.  It isn't what I'd call myself, I just didn't see the link 😉

Oh, I completely want to go to the resort they're at! It just seems like they stayed on it the entire time v. going to see anything cultural outside of it, and I'm tired of Christina seeming to take credit for Henry being there. Also, do we think her international friends are from living in different places, or just the people who work at the airports??

Also, @ZaldamoWilder, I just finished reading your entire post, and you should have a podcast!

Edited August 20, 2020 by Mercolleen

[LaLaLaLa]

11 hours ago, For Cereals said:

Bennett and Amelia are cute.  I could comment on the exchange of kisses for fun activities...his mom was a little intense, but Bennett seems well-adjusted.  I’m still not rescinding my comment about him starting a cult, but so far he seems to use his power for good.  I mean, a fort?  Cute.

Everyone is so concerned about Olivia, but I think Nostrils made good points this episode.  Olivia does seem to have a lot of expectations, but I think she is definitely more assertive than the skater (can’t remember her name) last season.

I question ChristinA’s motives for warning Olivia.  Is she really concerned, or is she just stirring up trouble?  Although with Henry, I might be bored enough to cause some chaos too.

I want to go to this resort.  It looks like a cruise on land!  Perfect for quarantine weight gain and stretchy pants.

Agreed. Christina either:

1) wants another couple to be in as rough of shape as her marriage

2) received $$ from a production to stir things up

Either way, I look forward to the end of Olivia & Brett. He may have his faults (and may be faking a lot for the cameras), but I don't care for Olivia. I don't see any positives from her except a stable, well paying job...plus she is not attractive.

Brett also had valid concerns on how she'll have room for a relationship with her time already committed to family and friends. I realize he was not willing to commit to what they'll do the MINUTE they get back but that seemed to be him playing passive aggressive due to feeling slighted with the rating and being pushed for a rating (even if that part wasn't Olivia's fault).

Edited August 20, 2020 by LaLaLaLa
Added last paragraph

[DrewPaul2010]

2 hours ago, cinsays said:

I agree.  I was in Olivia's corner but this episode has me thinking she's lying to herself if she thinks she is ok with a man who makes less. Not crazy about Brett, but he makes an ok living, is saving for the future and likes to stay home and cook instead of blowing all his money on expensive wine and trips. 

And if the girls were going to go sit at another table and chat about their experiences and do the stupid rating thing, maybe put them a bit further away from the guys' table? I would have been hurt to hear myself get rated so low too. 

She has no time for a husband or family, so maybe she just needs a pal to go do things with when she can fit him into her schedule.

Going from single to married is a transition for everyone especially if it includes children in the future. But I have no problem with someone working hard making good money and enjoying the fruits of their labor. I dislike someone who makes good money and is a tightfisted skinflint playing it on the cheap at all times. The question is whether they will come to like or love each other that they are willing to make the adjustments to make the marriage work.

[bichonblitz]

1 hour ago, Soup333 said:

Also, Brett was being intentionally obtuse in their conversation about what plans he had for when they returned home.

That's because he was already pissed off at the "ratings" conversation. He said at breakfast the next morning that he overheard some of the conversation with ChristieA and was upset about it. He wasn't in the mood to give Olivia the sunshine and roses outline of what he had in mind to make her happy for the rest of her life. Olivia blurts out her questions like a machine gun. She has no finesse at all. Did she mention what it is that she would like to do for Brett? It's the same old scenario with these couples. One is the giver, one is the taker. This is why most of these couple don't work out. 

I'm still rooting for Emilia/Bennett and Amani/ Woody. 

[suzeecat]

Does anyone else get a "V" vibe from Henry?  Poor guy, he would probably have been happy just to continue living whatever kind of life he had before all this, but I think he maybe got heavily strong-armed by his "friends" to do this because his "friends" realized this might be his only chance to ever get any romantic action in his life. 

[DrewPaul2010]

9 minutes ago, LaLaLaLa said:

Agreed. Christina either:

1) wants another couple to be in as rough of shape as her marriage

2) received $$ from a production to stir things up

Either way, I look forward to the end of Olivia & Brett. He may have his faults (and may be faking a lot for the cameras), but I don't care for Olivia. I don't see any positives from her except a stable, well paying job...plus she is not attractive.

Brett also had valid concerns on how she'll have room for a relationship with her time already committed to family and friends. I realize he was not willing to commit to what they'll do the MINUTE they get back but that seemed to be him playing passive aggressive due to feeling slighted with the rating and being pushed for a rating (even if that part wasn't Olivia's fault).

I think we can rule out #2 not because of moral integrity but it would be impossible for it not to be spilled and that would be huge unwanted trouble. That would be a titanic scandal.

1 is a possibility misery loves company...oddly though I don't think either of them have real hang ups with each other or any real dislike for one another. It would be better if they graded the marriage A-F. Christina could have given their marriage a C or C- which is a lot better sounding than a 5 but 5 is in the middle of the scale just as C is. A week long honey moon on vacation is hardly a barometer of where a marriage really at. Brett got at least a B. On a scale of 10, 7 7.5 is high on the scale of 10.

3. She could just be a busy body...some people are like that.

[suzeecat]

16 hours ago, CSunshine76 said:

As a fellow Christina who is called “ChristinE” constantly by coworkers and strangers, I felt Christina when she immediately snapped “ChristinA” at the producer.  I do the exact same thing. It’s two different names, and it gets so old.  So on that, I feel ya girl.  On everything else, not so much. 

As a Suzanne, it grates like nails on a chalkboard when I'm called Susan.  Nothing wrong at all with Susan, but it's not my name.  It makes me much more sensitive to being sure to address people by their correct name and especially not to shorten it unless they say it's OK.  Yeah, call me Sue, Suze, or Suzy if you want.  Just NOT Susan. (shrug)

Edited August 20, 2020 by suzeecat

[Empress1]

36 minutes ago, ZaldamoWilder said:

Now she knows, but what has he consistently decided to do since he's known?  What does their life look like if he says these side effects aren't cool, I'm finna flush these pills?  My dude was like nah I'm cool, I'm just gone decide to be in a good mood more often, no meds and no professional treatment. 

My first question would be, how are you managing it? If the answer is, like, "sheer force of will," that would be a problem. If the answer is "medication and weekly therapy," I would be much more receptive. I mean, as far as I'm concerned, there is not a soul alive who could not benefit from some regular therapy, so if anything I would think he's MORE in tune with himself than the average person. When my friend told me that her now-husband had bipolar disorder, I asked if that was a concern for her and she said no, because he had figured out his meds and treatment situation and was very committed to it. He's taken his meds in front of me.

(waves at @ZaldamoWilder Hey girl hey!)

[cardigirl]

14 hours ago, Sepalma23 said:

I just can’t stop laughing at that old ass suitcase Brett is using. Who in the hell even has a suitcase like that anymore??  I guess Brett🤪

On Bennett, though, it would be OOoooOoooOh, look at that charming old suitcase Bennett is using, right? 

[Boo Boo]

56 minutes ago, DrewPaul2010 said:

Going from single to married is a transition for everyone especially if it includes children in the future. But I have no problem with someone working hard making good money and enjoying the fruits of their labor. I dislike someone who makes good money and is a tightfisted skinflint playing it on the cheap at all times. The question is whether they will come to like or love each other that they are willing to make the adjustments to make the marriage work.

For sure.  For me, I just don't believe that Olivia is the jetsetter that she's no claiming to be.  Maybe Brett doesn't make a shit load of money, but he's in a profession where he probably could make as much as her and even eclipse her earnings.  Maybe the benefits he gets outweighs the salary?  

My problem with that discussion is that while she asked HIM if her making more than him was a problem, it clearly was to her as she laid out all of the expensive things she likes to do as if his paycheck was a deal breaker to their marriage.  I mean, imagine if it the roles were reversed and Brett was bummed out about her salary.  I realize that this is a reality show marriage (that is legal) but the way it came out, it certainly didn't sound like she was going to be good with her paying for them to enjoy luxury.   I'd imagine there were many men on MAFs that made more than the women they were paired with, but yet this wasn't a problem for them in terms of hampering their lifestyle. 

Not to mention, there are a lot of people that draw a big paycheck but are swimming in debt b/c of student loans, luxury items.  

Of course, if she laid out to MAFS that she makes X and wants her husband to make the same or more, it's their fuckery and she has a right to be annoyed.

 

Edited August 20, 2020 by Boo Boo

[ZaldamoWilder]

36 minutes ago, Mercolleen said:

Oh, I completely want to go to the resort they're at! It just seems like they stayed on it the entire time v. going to see anything cultural outside of it, and I'm tired of Christina seeming to take credit for Henry being there. Also, do we think her international friends are from living in different places, or just the people who work at the airports??

Also, @ZaldamoWilder, I just finished reading your entire post, and you should have a podcast!

Lol.  I'm sorry girl I had to.  I probably do *got* time for that lol.  Thanks for the compliment!!

7 minutes ago, Empress1 said:

My first question would be, how are you managing it? If the answer is, like, "sheer force of will," that would be a problem. If the answer is "medication and weekly therapy," I would be much more receptive. I mean, as far as I'm concerned, there is not a soul alive who could not benefit from some regular therapy, so if anything I would think he's MORE in tune with himself than the average person. When my friend told me that her now-husband had bipolar disorder, I asked if that was a concern for her and she said no, because he had figured out his meds and treatment situation and was very committed to it. He's taken his meds in front of me.

(waves at @ZaldamoWilder Hey girl hey!)

This is a healthy, mature and self evolutionary response.  And therapy? I'm here for it.  I wish my dude had had Miles' and your friend in law's outlook.  He said Imma just drink this ginger-tumeric tea and see how it goes....  

 

[DrewPaul2010]

21 minutes ago, suzeecat said:

Does anyone else get a "V" vibe from Henry?  Poor guy, he would probably have been happy just to continue living whatever kind of life he had before all this, but I think he maybe got heavily strong-armed by his "friends" to do this because his "friends" realized this might be his only chance to ever get any romantic action in his life. 

I suspect this whole adventure was way off his comfort scale by epic proportions but it seems to me he is getting more comfortable with the situation and perhaps in his own skin. He was more talkative and didn't look like a deer in the headlights this episode. I had some empathy for Christina until she dropped a dime on Bennet that was an awful look. I thought she was a looker but suddenly that went away.

[Jeanne222]

I think Bretts a really good communicator!  He and Olivia have had some meaningful conversations.  I could see Olivia married to a divorced doctor with his children from a previous marriage.  Money and a family..not of her making.  

There are single doctors. I wonder why she dispatch onto one?

Henry's still my guy!  He really shined in this episode and stayed up on his board while wifey floundered in the water.

Miles and Karen could say goodbye right now. She acts older than her age.  He tells her something about his health and all he gets is cold!   

Karen should be married to a 40 year old.  Miles is too good for her.  My heart hurts for him as he tries and gets nothing from her.

Bennett and Amelia might get a wake-up call when they enter real life!  They're too good together and I feel like we're being led down the garden path by production!

We'll see!

[cardigirl]

2 hours ago, Soup333 said:

I would say I'm surprised at the vitriol surrounding Olivia but I'm really not. She basically said she works hard for her money and likes to enjoy it. So what? She works a lot and wants to treat herself to nice things. How is that wrong? Brett is cool with his 8-4 and drinking cheap wine with his cat by his side. Okay? They differ in this area and it's a big deal for her. This doesn't make her a bitch. At all. 

Being in a relationship with someone who doesn't make as much as you and then having to pay for any plans you make is exhausting. As Erykah Badu sang, "Every time we go somewhere, I gotta reach down in my purse to pay your way and your homeboys way and sometimes your cousin's way." That shit is tiring. 

Now, one thing Olivia could do is see if they could compromise about some things. What if they discussed saving/investing his income and living off hers once they moved in together? Of course that arrangement is only worth serious consideration if they were to make it through the experiment, which I'm betting they won't.

Also, Brett was being intentionally obtuse in their conversation about what plans he had for when they returned home. Bet if Amani had asked Woody what plans he had, he'd have had a list as long as my arm about things he wanted to do/show/experience with her.

It wasn't that.  She started talking about how she has to facetime with her mom and friend every day, and she works long hours, and she's tired when she gets home and sometimes just wants to shower and go to bed, and basically has little time for him. When he asked where he fit in for any of that, she was pretty snippy with him about it, about not having to change her life for him.  And then not having to give up stuff she likes for anyone.  I saw no attempt on her part to even offer to talk about compromise. Plus the "grading" or "rating" of the marriage as a 7 clearly hurt his feelings, but she jumped right over that, so when she asked him what he was going to do when they got back, he went passive aggressive with the non-answer no plans stuff. I don't blame him.  

I bet he would have had plans about what to do when they get back if she had had his back about rating the marriage.  They are supposed to be a team. 

[Boo Boo]

5 minutes ago, cardigirl said:

It wasn't that.  She started talking about how she has to facetime with her mom and friend every day, and she works long hours, and she's tired when she gets home and sometimes just wants to shower and go to bed, and basically has little time for him. When he asked where he fit in for any of that, she was pretty snippy with him about it, about not having to change her life for him.  And then not having to give up stuff she likes for anyone.  I saw no attempt on her part to even offer to talk about compromise. Plus the "grading" or "rating" of the marriage as a 7 clearly hurt his feelings, but she jumped right over that, so when she asked him what he was going to do when they got back, he went passive aggressive with the non-answer no plans stuff. I don't blame him.  

I bet he would have had plans about what to do when they get back if she had had his back about rating the marriage.  They are supposed to be a team. 

Exactly.  As soon as she found out his paycheck isn't as fat as hers, she's too busy for him.  Then she's asking him what plans he has for her. Well, gee, you have no time for me, and I can't afford the things you like, remember? 

[DrewPaul2010]

8 minutes ago, cardigirl said:

It wasn't that.  She started talking about how she has to facetime with her mom and friend every day, and she works long hours, and she's tired when she gets home and sometimes just wants to shower and go to bed, and basically has little time for him. When he asked where he fit in for any of that, she was pretty snippy with him about it, about not having to change her life for him.  And then not having to give up stuff she likes for anyone.  I saw no attempt on her part to even offer to talk about compromise. Plus the "grading" or "rating" of the marriage as a 7 clearly hurt his feelings, but she jumped right over that, so when she asked him what he was going to do when they got back, he went passive aggressive with the non-answer no plans stuff. I don't blame him.  

I bet he would have had plans about what to do when they get back if she had had his back about rating the marriage.  They are supposed to be a team. 

I agree she didn't go out of her way to assure him that either he or the marriage was now first in her life and all other matters are secondary. Instead she assured him she'd squeeze him in somewhere...after all he's her husband!

[ECM1231]

2 hours ago, Boo Boo said:

2 hours ago, bichonblitz said:

So how much does Brett earn? 30, 40, 50K? How much does Olivia earn? 90, 120, 150K? Inquiring minds want to know. 

I swear before the marriage Olivia said she worked long hours, came home, exercised on her sad little stationary bike and didn't do much of anything else. It didn't sound like she goes out much. She also had a small apt. for such a successful high earning person that likes the finer things in life. Am I mistaking her for one of the others? 

Brett can stop with his single dude persona but I do think he's funny. He has a good sense of humor which Olivia doesn't get at all. I also think he was never attracted to Olivia from the get but he decided to make the most of what he got himself in to with the show and ride it out as best as he can unlike some others from the past who came out of the gate hating and wanting out. 

That's exactly right. The first episode, Olivia made it sound she was basically a cat lady homebody looking for the same thing.  Suddenly she's this glamorous world traveler that can't drink $20  bottle of wines. 

I do remember, though, that she said she was a HUGE fan of karaoke and often went to karaoke nights with friends. She either doesn't like to cook or doesn't know how to cook and said that she eats out quite often, so I'm counting eating out as kind of a necessity for her and it also counts as 'going out' after work. There are always take out options though.  

I'm with Brett on this one. I love  dining out as much as anyone, but eating out constantly is a huge hit on the budget. Huge. Plus, it's so much healthier to eat a home cooked meal.

After this episode I have sort of flip flopped. I don't mind Brett at all. I think he's actually quite funny and intelligent. Yeah, he didn't have to be such an ass when declining to rate his marriage and could have just said he preferred not to and left it at that, but I also don't think the "7" that Olivia gave him, was that awful. It certainly isn't a D...that would be more like a 6.   I'll have to go back and watch b/c I thought I remember hearing Olivia say that her spouse making as much or more $ than she was not a 'must have' for her.  I, too, cracked up when Brett jokingly made that quip about how happy he was that she was loaded.  I do think Brett is being on his best behavior and more than likely is not attracted to her, but he is playing nice for the camera. He's being polite and respectful and there's nothing wrong with that. It's a crap shoot with this show if it will work out or not. In Olivia's case I honestly don't know why she would apply for this show. She didn't seem to have any ulterior motives for appearing on this show from what I could see, except to find her soulmate. I don't think it's Brett but she left me wondering if she really even had time for a husband. As close as I was to my late mom, I never called her daily and who the heck has time to see friends almost every workday when you work such long hours?  

[Boo Boo]

2 minutes ago, DrewPaul2010 said:

I agree she didn't go out of her way to assure him that either he or the marriage was now first in her life and all other matters are secondary. Instead she assured him she'd squeeze him in somewhere...after all he's her husband!

Right and it's so odd to me given her personality of the first couple of episode was wanting to share her life with someone.  The way she's talking now, why get married at all?  Or hey, maybe you shouldn't get married at first sight and instead date the people that are going to be high earners who don't want kids.  

What I think is really going on is that she sense he isn't into her and has created this whole new persona of jetsetting high income earner.

[DrewPaul2010]

1 minute ago, ECM1231 said:

I do remember, though, that she said she was a HUGE fan of karaoke and often went to karaoke nights with friends. She either doesn't like to cook or doesn't know how to cook and said that she eats out quite often, so I'm counting eating out as kind of a necessity for her and it also counts as 'going out' after work. There are always take out options though.  

I'm with Brett on this one. I love  dining out as much as anyone, but eating out constantly is a huge hit on the budget. Huge. Plus, it's so much healthier to eat a home cooked meal.

 

Wait until we know what's coming....they won't have a choice about going out.

[Ilovepie]

Ok, lots of things in this episode stuck out to me, so here goes.....

Ok Olivia, take it down a notch. I think she worked herself into that tizzy for nothing, aided by the shitty promptings of her "friend" ChristinA. Her interactions with Brett reminded me of the movie When Harry Met Sally when he's describing her: "There are two kinds of women: high maintenance and low maintenance." Sally: "Which one am I?" Harry: "The worst one. You're high maintenance, but you think you're low maintenance." I think this pretty much sums up Olivia. Miss 70 and Sunny has a lot of rules and expectations. She thinks she's easy to get along with but in reality she is uptight and demanding. Bummer.

My husband and I laughed at Brett's comeback at ChristinA when she said she didn't like that he refused to answer the rating question. I can't remember exactly, but something like "How terrible for you." or some such. Girl, shut up and mind your own business. She deserved that.

Henry actually showed some personality. Him paddle boarding was hilarious for some reason. He was good at it! I have wanted to try that for so long - it's on my bucket list for Hawaii. We go almost every summer (sadly, not this year) and every year I say I'm going to do it, and every year we get busy and it never happens!

Karen bugged so much this episode! She is gorgeous, but her outfit on Unfiltered was too much. Is she leaving the couch and going straight to a pageant??? What was up with the evening gown???? I loved her hair though. On to the episode.....I cannot fathom what she means when she calls Miles "emotional" and insinuates that he is not "masculine" because he is open, honest and shares his feelings. Those things are not mutually exclusive! I assume she means he's weak? Wow. She needs to re-evaluate her priorities because the "masculine" guy she was dating before cheated and had a kid with someone else. Sweetie, your picker is broken. The experts did you a solid matching you with Miles and you are going to screw it up.

I freaking loved Amelia's song! Maybe the show should hire her to do the music - the stuff they use now is so terrible! When they made the fort though I had Katy Perry's Teenage Dream in my head......

Amani and Woody FTW. I really hope they make it. I will be so sad if they don't! Yes, I realize how I sound saying that.....I have no life.......... They are now my favorite MAFS couple of all time. Love them. And her dress on Unfiltered was awesome.......

[LaLaLaLa]

26 minutes ago, Jeanne222 said:

I think Bretts a really good communicator!  He and Olivia have had some meaningful conversations.  I could see Olivia married to a divorced doctor with his children from a previous marriage.  Money and a family..not of her making.  

There are single doctors. I wonder why she dispatch onto one?

Henry's still my guy!  He really shined in this episode and stayed up on his board while wifey floundered in the water.

Miles and Karen could say goodbye right now. She acts older than her age.  He tells her something about his health and all he gets is cold!   

Karen should be married to a 40 year old.  Miles is too good for her.  My heart hurts for him as he tries and gets nothing from her.

Bennett and Amelia might get a wake-up call when they enter real life!  They're too good together and I feel like we're being led down the garden path by production!

We'll see!

Yes. I dislike all the couples except Woody/Amani and Amelia/Bennett.

Karen may act older (she looks much older than the age she gave MAFS) but she's definitely immature. She has no idea what she wants and is making it very confusing for Miles. One minute she is unhappy that he has dated more women than she has dated men, but then she complains that she really wanted an alpha male (who typically "date" LOTS of women). Karen deserves to be single and miserable.

Edited August 20, 2020 by LaLaLaLa
Removed extra letter

[Soup333]

25 minutes ago, cardigirl said:

I bet he would have had plans about what to do when they get back if she had had his back about rating the marriage.  They are supposed to be a team. 

How was she supposed to know what he'd said to the guys when she was talking with the women? He overheard her rate the marriage a 7 from where she was standing at the bar. It doesn't appear that she was listening when he got all pissy about how degrading the ratings were - since she was at the bar. 

[Boo Boo]

41 minutes ago, ECM1231 said:

I do remember, though, that she said she was a HUGE fan of karaoke and often went to karaoke nights with friends. She either doesn't like to cook or doesn't know how to cook and said that she eats out quite often, so I'm counting eating out as kind of a necessity for her and it also counts as 'going out' after work. There are always take out options though.  

I'm with Brett on this one. I love  dining out as much as anyone, but eating out constantly is a huge hit on the budget. Huge. Plus, it's so much healthier to eat a home cooked meal.

After this episode I have sort of flip flopped. I don't mind Brett at all. I think he's actually quite funny and intelligent. Yeah, he didn't have to be such an ass when declining to rate his marriage and could have just said he preferred not to and left it at that, but I also don't think the "7" that Olivia gave him, was that awful. It certainly isn't a D...that would be more like a 6.   I'll have to go back and watch b/c I thought I remember hearing Olivia say that her spouse making as much or more $ than she was not a 'must have' for her.  I, too, cracked up when Brett jokingly made that quip about how happy he was that she was loaded.  I do think Brett is being on his best behavior and more than likely is not attracted to her, but he is playing nice for the camera. He's being polite and respectful and there's nothing wrong with that. It's a crap shoot with this show if it will work out or not. In Olivia's case I honestly don't know why she would apply for this show. She didn't seem to have any ulterior motives for appearing on this show from what I could see, except to find her soulmate. I don't think it's Brett but she left me wondering if she really even had time for a husband. As close as I was to my late mom, I never called her daily and who the heck has time to see friends almost every workday when you work such long hours?  

 I hated him the first couple of episodes. I totally thought he wanted a supermodel despite that he's not all that great looking and that he played up the fuckboy stuff too much. I totally thought he acted like an ass at the bachelor party and also thought if he was actively dating, he shouldn't be MAFS.

That said, I appreciate the fact that he has *some* personality.  Does Olivia even have a sense of humor?  She's got that soft, baby doll voice, but where is this supposedly fun-loving person?  She wasn't even fun-loving on the monkey bars -- just extremely competitive about winning like she's had to prove that she actually works out.

Edited August 20, 2020 by Boo Boo

[gingerandcloves]

It feels like Olivia really needs an on-call boyfriend, not a husband. She reminds me of my sister-in-law, who has never married but has a permanent guy friend (ex-boyfriend that is platonic now) who hangs around and does stuff with her when she wants him to, and then she sends him home when she's tired of him. She lives by herself with her cats and makes a good salary so she can travel, and go gambling, and do all the fun stuff, and isn't tied down. I think Olivia would love that - just have a guy available when she wants to go out, and hopefully he's rich enough to mimic her lifestyle, but doesn't require too much of her time and energy.

[Retired at last]

Just finished watching the show and it seems to me that Brett is the one who needs to run. When he finally gave Olivia the reason for his attitude and hurt feelings, she just shut him down with the totally unnecessary, "just put your big boy pants on and do what is expected." She totally blew off what he was feeling and sounded more like a mother than a partner. So, he, it appears, is done. And to me, she seems totally inflexible and just wants to fit him into her already established patterns, without compromising to fit into his.

I still feel so bad for Miles. Karen is giving him nothing, except an occasional cheek kiss. He is being patient and respectful and she is going to lose him if she doesn't get over herself.

Edited August 20, 2020 by Retired at last

[JapMo]

2 hours ago, Neurochick said:

Here's the thing though.  What if you get married to someone and that person contracts a serious illness, mental or otherwise.  Do you bail? 

I have a very sad story on that subject.  My boss' 32 year old son, who'd been married for 3 years...no kids yet...was in a terrible car accident that made him permanently paralyzed from the waist down.  This was a long time ago so not as many places handicapped accessible, not as many companies willing to accommodate someone handicapped, etc.  Anyway, he...not his wife...ended their marriage and his younger brother became his primary caretaker.  My boss said she wanted to blame the daughter-in-law, but said her son wouldn't give the girl any time to even get adjusted to the situation.  He was so convinced the wife was only staying because she felt obligated that he completely shut her out.  Boss said he stopped contributing to the marriage in any way, shape or form, and their relationship eventually just dried up.