S10.E18: Reunion Part 2

[nexxie]

In my experience, A birthday party for a kid and friends is different from a birthday party for a kid and extended family - most parents drop off their guest children for the kid party, and pick them up when it’s over. Problem here is that these women stayed to be on TV - let them bring their own chow bags!

[charliesan]

If Jennifer could dial it down around 10 notches she would be a favorite of mine, I think she does make some valid points whenever she's arguing with someone, but she's such a loud asshole that as much as I want to I can't get behind her. Having said that, the show needs her. 

In real life I'd love to befriend someone like Jackie, but in this show I do find her to be boring and condescending. Everyone tries to control their narrative and how they come across (except for maybe Jen and Margaret to a lesser degree) but she's a bit too "controlled" in my opinion. 

 

[politichick]

Jennifer's kids are not really friends with Jackie's kids. They were there for the show. The other kids seemed to have fun. And, as Jackie has said, she threw the party the birthday child(ren) wanted. Jen is a pretentious, nouveau riche, gauche cow.

[geauxaway]

Jackie has a grumpy cat face.   And then when she tries to be all cool it’s like hey I’m a slam a beer.  Whatever.  Stop trying to be all cool.  She is a try hard.  Smug ass bitch.  

And on that note I’m a book my kiddos bday party.  Corona be damned!  Worst case I lose $100 deposit?   Either way, I’m not going throw a pizza and a box of trickets and my kid and his friends (that would be embarrassing ).

[LibertarianSlut]

At the time the original episode aired, Jackie said she was inviting all the moms with small kids, who were just Jennifer and Melissa (Teresa has Audrianna, but they weren’t speaking at the time).  So, Jackie invited those women and their children to a children’s party at her home.

 I’m not understanding what reality TV and who is really friends with whom has to do with the situation.  Is there some unspoken rule that if you just invite someone over because they’re on the same TV show as you, you don’t have to be kind or gracious to them?  Like...they knew what they signed up for, so they should be up for anything?  Including the children?  Let’s say Jennifer is the most gauche person to have ever roamed the earth.  I’m not really talking about Jennifer; I’m talking about Jackie and how she related to her guests, or rather didn’t relate to them.  

If Jackie thought her underwhelming party would have made it to air if she only invited her sons’ friends who are comfortable being at this party, she could have and should have done that.  If she wants to stack the deck in her favor by inviting other people from her reality TV show to the party, she has just as much, if not more, of a duty to be a gracious host.  The fact that it’s on TV is more of a reason to make everyone comfortable, the way I see it anyway.  

Also, the kids are innocent players in this, and if Jackie didn’t make an effort to make Jennifer’s child comfortable, I don’t think that’s cool at all.  Say what you will about Teresa, but I think she, in her strange, automaton blinking way, has a soft spot for kids and would have paid more attention to the fact that the little girl was uncomfortable.  She is more sensitive to young people.  She wouldn’t even fight with Lauren Manzo at the season four reunion, even though Lauren was an adult, because she looked at her as Caroline’s daughter (for comparison, anyone remember when Caroline and Jacqueline cornered Gia at Jacq’s house and made Gia read that book about spoiled children and she started to cry?  😮)

Even if someone is over my house for a negative reason—if we have to discuss how we’re going to handle that their kids are yelling at night—it’s my home, and I feel that I have a responsibility to be hospitable to my guests.  I’m going to offer anyone who walks into my home a drink or a bathroom.  If they’re there for a party?  Whether I like them or not, they will be treated well.  If we’re gearing up for something truly unpleasant, it should be done in a neutral location.  If I cannot stand someone, they won’t be in my home.  I don’t believe in playing mind games about that stuff.  The person who isn’t gracious about their home always looks negative to me, no matter what kind of past injustice they’re seeking to right.  The home is not the place IMO.  I want anyone who steps on my property to feel like royalty.  And that has nothing to do with money.  

[geauxaway]

20 minutes ago, LibertarianSlut said:

At the time the original episode aired, Jackie said she was inviting all the moms with small kids, who were just Jennifer and Melissa (Teresa has Audrianna, but they weren’t speaking at the time).  So, Jackie invited those women and their children to a children’s party at her home.

 I’m not understanding what reality TV and who is really friends with whom has to do with the situation.  Is there some unspoken rule that if you just invite someone over because they’re on the same TV show as you, you don’t have to be kind or gracious to them?  Like...they knew what they signed up for, so they should be up for anything?  Including the children?  Let’s say Jennifer is the most gauche person to have ever roamed the earth.  I’m not really talking about Jennifer; I’m talking about Jackie and how she related to her guests, or rather didn’t relate to them.  

If Jackie thought her underwhelming party would have made it to air if she only invited her sons’ friends who are comfortable being at this party, she could have and should have done that.  If she wants to stack the deck in her favor by inviting other people from her reality TV show to the party, she has just as much, if not more, of a duty to be a gracious host.  The fact that it’s on TV is more of a reason to make everyone comfortable, the way I see it anyway.  

Also, the kids are innocent players in this, and if Jackie didn’t make an effort to make Jennifer’s child comfortable, I don’t think that’s cool at all.  Say what you will about Teresa, but I think she, in her strange, automaton blinking way, has a soft spot for kids and would have paid more attention to the fact that the little girl was uncomfortable.  She is more sensitive to young people.  She wouldn’t even fight with Lauren Manzo at the season four reunion, even though Lauren was an adult, because she looked at her as Caroline’s daughter (for comparison, anyone remember when Caroline and Jacqueline cornered Gia at Jacq’s house and made Gia read that book about spoiled children and she started to cry?  😮)

Even if someone is over my house for a negative reason—if we have to discuss how we’re going to handle that their kids are yelling at night—it’s my home, and I feel that I have a responsibility to be hospitable to my guests.  I’m going to offer anyone who walks into my home a drink or a bathroom.  If they’re there for a party?  Whether I like them or not, they will be treated well.  If we’re gearing up for something truly unpleasant, it should be done in a neutral location.  If I cannot stand someone, they won’t be in my home.  I don’t believe in playing mind games about that stuff.  The person who isn’t gracious about their home always looks negative to me, no matter what kind of past injustice they’re seeking to right.  The home is not the place IMO.  I want anyone who steps on my property to feel like royalty.  And that has nothing to do with money.  

BUT YOU ARE A LOSER AND JACKIE IS A WINNER!   WINNNNNNERRRRRR!!! 👉🏼👉🏼👉🏼👉🏼👉🏼👉🏼 Per Melissa Gorga.  

I can promise you, if anyone EVER put a finger at me about being a “loser” regarding spending money on my kid, I probably would fork them in the face.   Melissa might want to think twice about these accusations.  

Edited March 14, 2020 by geauxaway

[ichbin]

2 hours ago, geauxaway said:

BUT YOU ARE A LOSER AND JACKIE IS A WINNER!   WINNNNNNERRRRRR!!! 👉🏼👉🏼👉🏼👉🏼👉🏼👉🏼 Per Melissa Gorga.  

[Dance4Life]

On 3/12/2020 at 8:05 PM, kicksave said:

You bring up a good question....it was shocking to hear him say he did all the work on Jennifer and does work on other family members. This is an unwritten no no for any doctor  but especially a surgeon. My dad was a physician and never diagnosed or treated our family himself. He sent us to a colleague or someone highly recommended to him by another physician. Bill even said doing the surgery on Jennifer was stressful...duh! That’s why it is considered verboten for physicians to do so...the stress of treating or doing surgery on a loved one can result in mistakes or worse. Where the hell did this guy go to medical school anyway? The same place Delores’s daughter is going for veterinary medicine?

Doctors treat their family members all the time.  It is common. Not everyone has health insurance. I don’t see a problem with family doctors helping out.

Dr. Dubrow worked on Heather.  And, I believe Lisa’s husband (Miami) did her plastic surgeries as well.  
 

My parents are physicians and I get help from them all the time. As a matter of fact, my mom is getting a call from me in the morning! 
 

My insomnia medication is late! It was supposed to arrive on Friday.  Now....it will be here sometime next week.  Tomorrow!  I will sleep like a baby! Thanks, Mami!

 

Tony the Turk sucked out Jennifer’s back fat and transferred it to her lips! 💋

It is not like he gave her a much needed brain transplant! 
 

You don’t want to attend school in the Caribbean?  Things happen for a reason.  She can have a new life in paradise. Hopefully, she won’t be a doormat like her mom.  
 

Dolores, wake up, pretty lady!  You are losing good life on that.....weirdo DOCTOR!!! 
 

Regardless, no man is going to take Dolores seriously until she stops living and acting BFF with Frank.  Kids are grown.  Bye, Frank!  Hahahahaha! 

[Dance4Life]

8 hours ago, geauxaway said:

BUT YOU ARE A LOSER AND JACKIE IS A WINNER!   WINNNNNNERRRRRR!!! 👉🏼👉🏼👉🏼👉🏼👉🏼👉🏼 Per Melissa Gorga.  

I can promise you, if anyone EVER put a finger at me about being a “loser” regarding spending money on my kid, I probably would fork them in the face.   Melissa might want to think twice about these accusations.  

Omg!  Lol!  I get what Melissa was trying to say ...... but, it came off wrong.  Maybe not the correct saying for this type of situation.

 

You have 2 rich ladies throwing (or, not) extravagant kiddie parties.

 

That is totally my pet peeve.  People think if parents are ‘saving’ money .....it is for their kids. Maybe not!

 

I do think Jackie wanted everyone to know she is rich. Now, she won’t stop smirking......her stupid cheesy grin.

 

 

Since, Jackie has met Jennifer......she developed this weird attraction to her. 
 

Now, that we hear about the Nuggets VIP trips......why the heck did Jackie ever write that ‘spoiled children’ article about Jennifer’s kids??

 

Jackie has ‘unhealthy feelings’ towards Jennifer.  
 

Jackie told us she is rich to grab Jennifer’s attention.
 

 Both.....to attract friendship and annoy her. 
 

Jennifer will always be loyal to her Housewife idol.......Teresa.

 

 

[Hiyo]

Quote

Since, Jackie has met Jennifer......she developed this weird attraction to her. 

I think Jackie might have also realized going after Teresa wouldn't lead anywhere.

[BrindaWalsh]

People seem to think that "experience gifts" somehow pamper a child less than "stuff."  So people have really latched on to that not really realizing that it is just as tone deaf and comes from a place of privelege, and gets more and more extravagant as people go on.  Does Jackie think that hopping on a plane to Colorado for a weekend, courtside seats, staying at the Four Seasons is somehow less frivolous than an extravagant party?  Probably, so many people do nowadays.  But it is ultimately the same animal, different stripes.  Evan was talking about how they don't spoil their kids and give them what they need.  Well - what do they think kids need?  That is really the distinction, not just statements about experience and not spoiling.  I guarantee those kids are just as spoiled as every other kid in the upscale towns of Bergen County, NJ.  So people have to put aside the stuff and the experiences as some kind of marker of who spoils their kids less and look at something else.  Attitude and behavior.  Right now, Jackie's kids, after 2 seasons, have been seemingly well behaved and respectful kids.  So there you have it.  

Evan and his low sodium diet comment was disgusting.  And also something you know he was just dying to say.  I know a lot of people think he is hot, etc.  He strikes me as a bit of a douchey frat boy.  

Jen came off as desperate but she is not going anywhere, the show would be pretty boring without her.  But the staged eye narrowing glares, head shakes and jaw drops were a bit over the top staged.  But I won't lie, I agree that Melissa is too self-absorbed for another kid.

Edited March 14, 2020 by BrindaWalsh

[kicksave]

7 hours ago, Dance4Life said:

Doctors treat their family members all the time.  It is common. Not everyone has health insurance. I don’t see a problem with family doctors helping out.

Dr. Dubrow worked on Heather.  And, I believe Lisa’s husband (Miami) did her plastic surgeries as well.  
 

My parents are physicians and I get help from them all the time. As a matter of fact, my mom is getting a call from me in the morning! 
 

My insomnia medication is late! It was supposed to arrive on Friday.  Now....it will be here sometime next week.  Tomorrow!  I will sleep like a baby! Thanks, Mami!

 

Tony the Turk sucked out Jennifer’s back fat and transferred it to her lips! 💋

It is not like he gave her a much needed brain transplant! 
 

You don’t want to attend school in the Caribbean?  Things happen for a reason.  She can have a new life in paradise. Hopefully, she won’t be a doormat like her mom.  
 

Dolores, wake up, pretty lady!  You are losing good life on that.....weirdo DOCTOR!!! 
 

Regardless, no man is going to take Dolores seriously until she stops living and acting BFF with Frank.  Kids are grown.  Bye, Frank!  Hahahahaha! 

OK...not to parse...but a parent who is a physician diagnosing a cold, flu or some other mainstream illness is one thing but to do complicated surgery on a family member is absolutely wrong. It may not be in the hippocratic oath but it is widely observed by most reputable surgeons who perform complex procedures. Many times over the years I would call my dad for advice or his thoughts on what I should do if I or my family members are experiencing a health issue...he would offer up his thoughts and then always suggest we go to the pediatrician or our family GP. And please...bringing up "Dr. Miami" as an example of a surgeon performing procedures on family is making me laugh.  I can't believe that guy still has a license to do any procedures.

[ichbin]

 

8 hours ago, Hiyo said:

I think Jackie might have also realized going after Teresa wouldn't lead anywhere.

Regardless of how someone feels about Teresa and the activities that landed both her and Joe in jail, Teresa remains the sole housewife of any real interest on this franchise.  Now that she and Joe are separated production can focus on how she and the family are coping and adjusting to a life in which he is no longer a main player. 

Melissa and Joe have nothing without their tie to Teresa.  If Teresa is smart and wants them off the show for good she will avoid any shows of rancor with them. 

The best Marge could come up with this season is her early neglect by her mother. Snore.... All she has going for her aside from that is  playing the victim after events in which she has played an active role herself.  It's tired.

Must we endure another season of Jackie talking about her eating disorder?  Another snore.... She is already starting to show cracks (the carefully measured reveals about her wealth which come off as humble bragging), but I find that more annoying than interesting. 

Jennifer keeps things lively, has a sense of humor, and appears to be more "real" (warts and all) than the others.  She can stay.  I'd like to see more about her extended family too.  They bring something different to the table.

Dolores is a grounding presence for the most part and also has that weird relationship with her ex who seems to enjoy the camera as much as Joe Gorga.  

Like it or not, Teresa is the star player and the rest know it too.  

Edited March 14, 2020 by ichbin

[NYCFree]

I find Jackie and Margaret to be the intelligent and interesting women, in themselves. Margaret has her weird relationship with Marge senior that kind of fascinates me; Jackie’s background and education makes her compelling to me. 

Jennifer and Theresa are fun to watch in the hot mess kind of way.

Delores and Melissa aren’t really interesting in themselves, but have organic relationships (real outside of the show) with each other and Theresa and serve to balance the others.

I think we need a mix of personalities to have an entertaining show. I’d hate to see shrieking, over the top personalities be deemed the only ones interesting to watch.

[SweetieDarling]

Was anyone else irritated by the questioning about if Tre were never on the show, she and Joe would never have had to go away? I mean, even Andy said, he'd have never gotten caught, as if that were more important than the fact that HE WAS BREAKING THE LAW. They made it seem as if getting caught or ratted on was a bigger offense than the crime! Is this the world we live in?

[Stats Queen]

50 minutes ago, SweetieDarling said:

Was anyone else irritated by the questioning about if Tre were never on the show, she and Joe would never have had to go away? I mean, even Andy said, he'd have never gotten caught, as if that were more important than the fact that HE WAS BREAKING THE LAW. They made it seem as if getting caught or ratted on was a bigger offense than the crime! Is this the world we live in?

I caught that, no wonder they have no remorse- it’s find unless you get caught🤷‍♂️ 

[SweetieDarling]

Just now, Stats Queen said:

I caught that, no wonder they have no remorse- it’s find unless you get caught🤷‍♂️ 

And, even then, it's someone else's fault...it was all good until someone notified the authorities. 🤦‍♀️

[Hiyo]

Quote

The best Marge could come up with this season is her early neglect by her mother. Snore.... All she has going for her aside from that is  playing the victim after events in which she has played an active role herself.  It's tired.

Well, she had her feud with Danielle, who is now gone...

[breezy424]

Sorry, doing cosmetic surgery on your spouse is just all sorts of creepy to me.  It just is.

[Kdawg82]

Melissa still trying to be the HBIC. nope..we all know you're not it, Mel. But I enjoy Marge and probably always will. Jackie- I agree she is too in contol over how she's portrayed. But there are parts of her i enjoy. Tree still very tame for her. 

I'm tired of the kids' party thing. Get over it. Agreed there are better ways of handling it but all depends on how many adults will attend. Just for Melissa and Jen, a cup of coffee or tea would've probably been fine.  For 10 parents there could've been more options. 

[IslandGirl]

On 3/12/2020 at 10:12 AM, LibertarianSlut said:

 

Maybe there were familial expectations too.  Last season there was talk of arranged marriage within Jennifer’s family, although I don’t believe it to be the case with Jennifer and Bill.  I don’t think there’s anything wrong with “arranged marriage” for the record either.  It’s not, as the stereotype that Margaret perpetuated, a mail order bride thing, or necessarily something where the bride and groom meet each other at the altar for the first time.  

For instance, in The Big Sick, which was semi-autobiographical (and a pretty good movie), the male protagonist’s Pakistani parents had an arranged marriage, but they dated.  They went on several group dates to the movies before realizing there was an attraction, and decided they wanted to be together, and a lot of The Big Sick’s plot revolves around the main character’s mom trying to set him up with an assortment of Pakistani women, and the couple is always encouraged to date and see if there’s chemistry.  This happens in the Orthodox Jewish community too, although they might not call it arranged marriage.  

I agree with, and believe in, an extended family helping a young woman or man meet a mate.  In all likelihood, the families know of and approve of each other, which means that there’s a very diminished possibility that the guys someone dates will drop them off on their front lawn drunk (it happened to me and I didn’t think it was such a big deal at the time, but I’d be mortified if I had a daughter and it happened to her).  I also think it makes women less desperate.  If she has a college boyfriend who is not treating her well, she may not be so glued to the phone if she knows in the back of her mind that mom or dad have 15-20 guys waiting if this one falls through.

So, all this to say that Bill and Jen might have been set up by family and they realized they have an attraction, which is what gets the thing going, and values, which preserve them as a couple for life.  

I find it fascinating that arranged marriages have the same success/failure rate as non-arranged marriages. I have a 23 year old & was just thinking about what an enormous responsibility it must be to help choose your child's spouse/partner...

[kicksave]

On 3/13/2020 at 4:03 AM, Marley said:

Joe Gorga is the worst. Someone who talks so much about sex is probably barely having sex ugh. I can’t stand him.

He is obsessed with bragging about his penis and how awesome it is...it's just gross and usually when a guy continually does this he is compensating for a small penis. Between this and his cave man attitude towards women and archaic views on sex education for his daughter, he just seems like a jerk. 

[IslandGirl]

I live for Jackie's ear to ear shit eating grin whenever she's complimented--it's so guileless! 🤣She's like a child busting at the seams with pride & joy; I can't figure out if it's annoying or endearing, or both!

[Sew Sumi]

10 minutes ago, IslandGirl said:

I live for Jackie's ear to ear shit eating grin whenever she's complimented--it's so guileless! 🤣She's like a child busting at the seams with pride & joy; I can't figure out if it's annoying or endearing, or both!

She's probably patting herself on the back, thinking "job well done." 

Not so fast there, buckaroo.

[Hiyo]

With regards to the birthday thing...you can make it a bit different and special without breaking the bank. It doesn't have to be 2 extremes.

In addition to pizza, throw in a build-your-own hotdog sandwich station as well, or a build-your-own hamburger one, or both...this way, it keeps the parents happy with more options and makes it a bit more than the usual playdate kids may have.

[IslandGirl]

20 hours ago, Hiyo said:

With regards to the birthday thing...you can make it a bit different and special without breaking the bank. It doesn't have to be 2 extremes.

In addition to pizza, throw in a build-your-own hotdog sandwich station as well, or a build-your-own hamburger one, or both...this way, it keeps the parents happy with more options and makes it a bit more than the usual playdate kids may have.

Perfect; nice compromise. And at the end, you throw the giant Amazon box on the driveway for the build-your-own gift bag! 

[Kdawg82]

I got criticized by a family member for having the same catered fare every year at our kids' b-day. I had pizza, sammies, pasta & a salad. Don't like it? Don't show up. There's liquor, fruit, dessert, coffee & tea. I'm sure anyone would attend to just hang out. We have a great time indoor/outdoor. Oh & all kids get great gifts more than a goodie bag. 

[AryasMum]

On 3/15/2020 at 4:10 PM, IslandGirl said:

I find it fascinating that arranged marriages have the same success/failure rate as non-arranged marriages. I have a 23 year old & was just thinking about what an enormous responsibility it must be to help choose your child's spouse/partner...

That is definitely fascinating. But as arranged marriages tend to occur in very traditional cultures, then wouldn’t it be very frowned upon to divorce?  Staying married through a miserable marriage is not a successful marriage, at least for me. 

[Baltimore Betty]

14 hours ago, Kdawg82 said:

I got criticized by a family member for having the same catered fare every year at our kids' b-day. I had pizza, sammies, pasta & a salad. Don't like it? Don't show up. There's liquor, fruit, dessert, coffee & tea. I'm sure anyone would attend to just hang out. We have a great time indoor/outdoor. Oh & all kids get great gifts more than a goodie bag. 

You had me at liquor.

[LibertarianSlut]

On 3/17/2020 at 12:14 PM, AryasMum said:

That is definitely fascinating. But as arranged marriages tend to occur in very traditional cultures, then wouldn’t it be very frowned upon to divorce?  Staying married through a miserable marriage is not a successful marriage, at least for me. 

I looked into this a little bit, and I was surprised how many cultures arranged marriage spanned.  Some are very traditional, some are traditional, and some are modern.  I would definitely agree that there is probably a higher instance of arranged marriage in more traditional cultures.  And I agree that familial expectations are likely a factor in preventing divorce, but nothing indicates that it’s the leading factor.  That also kind of begs the question—would people be slower to jump into non arranged marriages if they thought their family and community would frown upon them divorcing?  Probably.  And maybe it is wise to look more before we leap, even if the causes for taking these measures are external. 

So I don’t think familial expectations are the main reason arranged marriages “work.”  I think it’s because the couple getting married is more prepared for a long commitment and hard work or they wouldn’t agree to it in the first place.  There was no indication from what I read that the parties involved are miserable, though I did read about a few of them balking prior to the wedding.  One woman even snubbed the groom and married a different man on her wedding day.  The Real Housewives have nothing on that sort of drama!  Andy, are you listening lol? 

I only looked into this briefly—I don’t have hard data or facts upon which I usually base my opinions, but from what I did find, it seems at least good enough as something parents may want to consider for their children.  Like I said in an earlier post, even if the offspring wind up meeting their mate in a more modern way, they might feel more confident knowing that mom and dad will have their back if they can’t find a mate on their own, thus driving their confidence, thus leading to better decisions.  

 Even a conversation about it is positive, because it helps people frame their ideals better.  If a child has to explain to their parents why they reject arranged marriage, it may help them form a more crystallized picture of what they do want, which may, consciously or subconsciously, help them reach those goals.  Anyway, I’m 99.999% not going to have kids, and I already have a husband, so it’s moot for me, but I think the concept is cool.

[Gigi43]

These days it's so common, to put your info on a dating site and let an algorithm match you, but if you say your family set you up with someone within your culture/community has a stigma attached as arranged and both are fine. It wouldn't surprise me if the divorce rate is lower in arranged marriages out of actual compatibility and not just pressure to stay married.  

 

However I don't think Bill and Jen were arranged. I thought she said once (don't remember when probably last season) her family had someone in mind for her but then she met Bill in the community. 

[Hiyo]

Things are changing among people with arranged marriages in that divorces are becoming more common now, and not as shameful. Of course, it varies from country to country and group to group, but it is happening more than it did in the past.