the-grey-lady

Recapville, Population 1!

I've been happily binging The Good Place all day, so I decided to torpedo my good mood. It's recap time!

I am so hideously tired of Yolanda's bewilderment at "Williams"'s inconsistencies. "Nigerian? Why would his profile say Nigerian?" "Why doesn't he know which airport is near his house?" "Why won't he video chat me?" Me: "Gee, Yolanda, I don't know. It's a damn mystery!"

Has anyone volunteered to do this week's recap? If not, I'm feeling exceptionally snarky right about now.

I completely agree. And if we did away with the initial appointment scene, we would also be free of my least favorite part of every episode: the hand-wringing from the poundticipant wondering "what Dr. Now will ask them to dooooo." I'm tired of yelling "He's going to ask you to eat less!" every Wednesday.

The most unrealistic scene in this entire episode was when Bonnie asked Asher why he wasn't going to graduation the next day -- as if we could really believe that any of the K4 is on track to graduate.

Please tell me I'm not the only one who burst out laughing at SojaBoy's "performance." What woman hasn't melted into a puddle of goo when her silver-tongued intended uttered these words of seduction: "You know, any time I talked to you on the phone, I always told you that I love you. So I decided to do this for you and for the sake of our love." I started laughing typing that. Comedy gold.

I'm going to regret asking this. Is Chase...wearing...a sweater?

I cannot express how happy I am to see "what a blow we've been dealt!" moving into everyday conversation.

She looks like she's about to pull the 2pm shift at Bob's Bait & Tackle & Gentleman's Club, right off highway 45.

That's so selfish, MonicaM! If Meri lived in some dinky condo, she'd have no place to store her mountains of LuLaRags, and where would her hypothetical eleventy-billion spirit children sleep?!

"We both like soup."

Meri wanted the opportunity to be in the trees. Then she wanted the chance to change her mind about said trees, as many times as her little heart desired.

I don't know it's possible, but Kody managed to Out-Douche himself this episode. How long did we watch him summon up his courage to make a phone call to ask a question of some dude he'd never met and probably never would? Did he honestly admit ON TV that he never thought of what sort of infrastructure is required to build on undeveloped land? He REALLY thought that building on Plague Pass, replete with scrub and not much else, would take the SAME AMOUNT OF TIME as erecting a crappy brown box in an existing development? How hard is he spinning the narrative that HE COULDA JUST STAYED IN VEGAS AND MADE A FORTUNE, as if we didn't WATCH HIM, ON TV, cajole and berate his "wives" into selling the Vegas homes RIGHT NOW NOW NOW because they were going to make sooooo much money, and Flagstaff was gonna be cheaper (even though it wasn't) and now he's complaining about being broke? Honorable mention to Robyn, who doesn't understand how school zones work. I want to send a fruit basket to that poor, put-upon realtor.

Ah, sweet romance. How many epic proposal stories have begun with such hope and optimism?

I should've listened to my gut and turned this off before the first scene ended. I have no desire to watch that kind of stomach-churning violence on primetime TV.

OMG, I chortled out loud when suave Whitney sidled up to Chase and initiated the all-important baby-makin' convo with this come-hither opening line: "So I've had my period six times in the past year. That's more than I've ever had it. It's like my body just KNOWS." Watching her stomp away in a huff when this line failed to turn Chase on was the icing on the hated cake.

I agree. That scene totally felt to me like Kody showed up, for the first time in awhile, determined to parent his kids RIGHT THIS DAMN SECOND, and he flailed pathetically. I think Kody likes to look like an involved, doting father, but that segment didn't show him as involved and doting; he looked like an arrogant buffoon.

It's available on Amazon Prime.

I'm salivating over that one. I just watched the previews for it (I'm unspoiled), and I'm dying to find out what the hell went wrong.

I'm watching the hometown episode now. He won't quit saying it! "It's okay. It's okay." That doesn't mean anything! Clearly it isn't okay!

I'm about halfway through Juan Pablo's season, and...wow, he can't handle emotions at all, can he? "I don't want you to cry." "Everything is fine." "It's okay." Are those pat phrases really supposed to make the "girls" feel better?

Janelle is an experienced health and wellness coach?! Who does she think she's fooling? Oh, right. Herself.

The editors were on freaking point this week. Glenn: This [the weightlifting championship] is grander than I expected. [camera cuts to two rows of sparsely-filled folding chairs]

Peter (to Hannah Ann): I love you, but also someone else. I might propose to either of you. [the next day] Peter: Hannah Ann might not be coming! That makes no sense! Me: It's a mystery all right.