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Jenelle: Birther Of 3, Mother To None

DangerousMinds

By DangerousMinds
in Teen Mom 2

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Everyone knows Ensley does not have Down syndrome. Posts suggesting that she does will be removed and warnings issued. Posts such as these leave the impression that an arguably unflattering picture could somehow be construed as a child being disabled is considered ableist and is against the rules of the board.

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lovesnark

lovesnark

59 minutes ago, GreatKazu said:

If she had any work done on that chin she should get her money back.

I do remember her "falling down" when she and UBT were first together, and she had to get stitches.

That Kail. Good for pointing fingers and for painting other people as assholes when she is the biggest asshole of them all.

That's right! I'd forgotten about that. Babs was there to either drop off or pick up Jace and she commented on the stitches on Jenelle's chin. And, in keeping with how she talks to her mother every time she opens her nasty mouth, Jenelle  told Barb she 'fell getting out of the Uber', it was none of her business and to shut the fuck up, dude. I remember Jenelle wanting Dr Miami to shave her chin at about the same time Hulk got her Mother Russia ass and he couldn't/wouldn't do it. I think it was at the very beginning of Jenelle's seeing molecules mystery illness that magically disappeared.

I want to say a thank you the size of Hulk's ass to all of you. Reading here every morning gives me much needed laughs before I head over to work on the rental house.  I'm pretty sure that when I'm done with this project, I won't pick up a paint brush or roller for the rest of my days! It's a sorry state of affairs when you get excited because you'll be using a different color of paint today. I chose a different color for the bathrooms and have the first one just about ready to start. Woohoo!  LOL!

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politichick
politichick

Not to mention how Leah has probably accelerated Ali's physical decline because she refuses to follow the fucking rules regarding the wheel chair and physical activity. Barb has made sure that Ja

Kareny
Kareny

Maryssa is free! Hallelujah. Two down, two to go.

Uncle JUICE
Uncle JUICE

Look, who are we to judge? Look, if you're married for any amount of time, or really in any sort of regular, healthy relationship, who among you HASN'T threatened their significant other with posting

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GreatKazu

GreatKazu

10 minutes ago, lovesnark said:

That's right! I'd forgotten about that. Babs was there to either drop off or pick up Jace and she commented on the stitches on Jenelle's chin. And, in keeping with how she talks to her mother every time she opens her nasty mouth, Jenelle  told Barb she 'fell getting out of the Uber', it was none of her business and to shut the fuck up, dude. I remember Jenelle wanting Dr Miami to shave her chin at about the same time Hulk got her Mother Russia ass and he couldn't/wouldn't do it. I think it was at the very beginning of Jenelle's seeing molecules mystery illness that magically disappeared.

I want to say a thank you the size of Hulk's ass to all of you. Reading here every morning gives me much needed laughs before I head over to work on the rental house.  I'm pretty sure that when I'm done with this project, I won't pick up a paint brush or roller for the rest of my days! It's a sorry state of affairs when you get excited because you'll be using a different color of paint today. I chose a different color for the bathrooms and have the first one just about ready to start. Woohoo!  LOL!

Re the bold, it never ceases to amaze me how Jenelle immediately becomes defensive and takes a slight to every GDamn thing Barb says to her. Even when Barb is as sweet as can be, Jenelle takes offense. In the episode where Barb couldn't hear what Jenelle said on the phone, Jenelle immediately goes into Kail-Hulk mode. She then had the audacity to say how it is Barb who always jumps on her ass and it is Barb's fault for Jenelle having to react the way she does. Excuse me, bitch?

Painting is so fun! Until you have to paint for days. I know that feeling, girlfriend. I spent so much time painting and helping with some renovation work on one of our rentals last years. Two months! I didn't want to see a paintbrush or roller for the longest time.

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MissMel

MissMel

Hey!  If you do take UBT to doctor shop in NYC, please video him 'filling the streets with uppercut'.  We need to compare his technique with how well he 'moved those guys his muthafukkin' self', in California.  (I mean, Dude, Larry didn't even flinch!)

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ShaNaeNae

ShaNaeNae

20 minutes ago, MissMel said:

Hey!  If you do take UBT to doctor shop in NYC, please video him 'filling the streets with uppercut'.  We need to compare his technique with how well he 'moved those guys his muthafukkin' self', in California.  (I mean, Dude, Larry didn't even flinch!)

HAAAA.  His little side skip towards them like he was going to bust some ass and then when they didn't move, he stopped.  She may have the least amount of drama with him, but he creeps me out way more than any of her boyfriends.  He's just so...ICK. 

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GreatKazu

GreatKazu

31 minutes ago, MissMel said:

Hey!  If you do take UBT to doctor shop in NYC, please video him 'filling the streets with uppercut'.  We need to compare his technique with how well he 'moved those guys his muthafukkin' self', in California.  (I mean, Dude, Larry didn't even flinch!)

Larry is more scared of Farrah! He flinched right before she pushed him.

 

2 hours ago, DudeLeaveMeAlone said:

Dude, you have no idea, dude. Like on a molecular level, my aggravation is making me act dramastically.

Go smoke some pot. Tyler and Cate can hook you up.

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CofCinci

CofCinci

10 hours ago, Christina87 said:

Is it just me, or does Jenelle not say "dude" nearly as much now? Maybe UBT doesn't like it. I miss it!!!

You're right. Somehow I've started to write "dude" more here and say it in real life. 

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Blissfool

Blissfool

On 3/21/2017 at 10:39 PM, GreatKazu said:

jenelle_profile.jpg

Jenelle has one ugly profile. It reminds me of these:

Sunny Jim Cave in La Jolla here in California:

sunny_jim_cave.jpg

Jay Leno's profile:

jay_leno_profile.jpg

And you all know this man:

abe_lincoln_profile.jpg

Funny. All her profile reminds me of is ?and ?.

Sorry, had to use emojis because I'm not techy enough to add images. 

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Fosca

Fosca

5 minutes ago, zenme said:

I agree. Not the most attractive profile. I agree with whoever compared her to John Lithgow. She's like a young Lithgow in drag.

Roberta Muldoon?

download.jpeg

download (1).jpeg

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leighroda

leighroda

David is apparently going to make Kaiser a great man 

just finding the right place to hide Jenelles body ?.

 I'm not a huge Nathan fan, but he's still Kaisers father, which was a decision Jenelle made, not Kai. It makes me so mad that she gives David so much credit, when he probably won't be around in a few years. If I were more vindictive with more free time on my hands I would make a point to save all of these "David is so wonderful" tweets and send them to her when she's giving us the "David was so mean, I was so sad, but I acted like I was happy" after they break up.

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lovesnark

lovesnark

22 hours ago, CofCinci said:

https://mobile.twitter.com/PBandJenelley_1/status/845271669186990080

And another Tweet about pain. Get those Rx opioids, gurl!

Oh, and she and David are back together - but we're never apart. ?

Well then, Jenelle, if ya don't opt for getting ya tubes tied, don't have an epidural when you have more kids to ignore. Labor is supposed to hurt. That's why it's called labor. If you can't spawn without an epidural, stop spawning. Maybe that's another reason she keeps bringing innocent children into her fucked up world. She's never fully experienced the transition stage of labor.

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zenme

zenme

Forever home for who? Well, hopefully she will leave the exterior the blank slate that it is so the family who will purchase the house when Jenelle's checks stop coming in can personalize it to their taste.

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lovesnark

lovesnark

2 hours ago, guilfoyleatpp said:

Try a chiropractor, lady.  Maybe she didn't get the memo that they stopped prescribing opioids for back pain.

She wouldn't see a chiropractor because they can't write prescriptions - haha!

My kids are 31 and 26, so it's been a long time since I was up to date on birthing trends. Is it standard these days to have an epidural just because it's available? I didn't have one with either of mine and, yeah, it hurt like hell but I delivered them just fine without having anything.

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Lizz

Lizz

What?  Janelle's not tweeted about her spring break plans yet? She usually acts like she's a 19 year old university sophomore going to Panama City with the sorority sisters.  

I think the time she had a meltdown when Barbara dared to ask her to keep Jace so she could go to her other daughters......it was sprrriiiing brrreak! She had plans that always come first.

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MissMel

MissMel

Well yes, but I think that time she had a paid gig to attend.  She couldn't say that because they hadn't broken the fourth wall yet.  

Not that it matters.  I'm a little shocked she hasn't taken off for spring break, myself.

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Vandy10

Vandy10

Uh, why is Jenelle saying that Marissa lives with them full time? That can't be true, right? Anyone got the scoop on the custody arrangement with David and his ex-wife/first baby momma?

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lovesnark

lovesnark

"Full time" to Jenelle is anything more that one weekend a month. Remember when she was chasing Nathan down to dump Kaiser on him because she'd had him for "2 whole weeks all by herself"? Tori was living with her then and taking care of the Roll. Jenelle gave an interview to some mag and claimed Tori was her nanny.

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SPLAIN

SPLAIN

Quote

Remember when she was chasing Nathan down to dump Kaiser on him because she'd had him for "2 whole weeks all by herself"?

My blood is boiling just thinking of that scene. Wasn't it during that time when Jenelle told Barb how Kaiser was crying a lot and Barb suggested to her he might be sick only to have Jenelle blow her top about it?

Didn't UBT's ex request removal of the restraining order a while back? Isn't he supposed to be caring for his son from that relationship as well?

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ReadMeLattice

ReadMeLattice

1 hour ago, Vandy10 said:

Uh, why is Jenelle saying that Marissa lives with them full time? That can't be true, right? Anyone got the scoop on the custody arrangement with David and his ex-wife/first baby momma?

I'm pretty sure Jenelle's "full time" is equivalent to Adam's "50/50 custody," aka bullshit. 

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SPLAIN

SPLAIN

2 minutes ago, Lm2162 said:

I'm pretty sure Jenelle's "full time" is equivalent to Adam's "50/50 custody," aka bullshit. 

Exactly.

Jenelleisms -

Jenelle having pizza delivered means she made dinner.

Jenelle having given birth means she is a mother.

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ReadMeLattice

ReadMeLattice

(edited)
5 minutes ago, SPLAIN said:

Exactly.

Jenelleisms -

Jenelle having pizza delivered means she made dinner.

Jenelle having given birth means she is a mother.

"Doing better"= "I haven't gotten arrested for a felony in six months" 

"We have a great relationship"= "neither of us has gotten arrested for DV in three months"

Edited by Lm2162
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Laura281

Laura281

10 hours ago, lovesnark said:

 

My kids are 31 and 26, so it's been a long time since I was up to date on birthing trends. Is it standard these days to have an epidural just because it's available? I didn't have one with either of mine and, yeah, it hurt like hell but I delivered them just fine without having anything.

My kids are 32 and 30, and I don't know anyone who didn't get epidurals back then.  It was quite the norm back then, at least in Houston.  

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Christina

Christina

On 3/24/2017 at 0:36 PM, Christina87 said:

Is it just me, or does Jenelle not say "dude" nearly as much now? Maybe UBT doesn't like it. I miss it!!!

At one of the reunions or clips shows, they showed a montage of her saying, "Dude!" and she claimed she didn't realize she said it as much as she did, along with another phrase, I think. Maybe seeing it broke her of the habit, and they should show her a clip of her being a spiteful and hateful bitch to everyone around her, along with her ignoring her kids, to break her of those habits, too. 

Of course, she would probably just be like Kail and give a long post about how they only film and air a little bit and don't show her playing with the kids or complimenting her mom, because it doesn't fit into their narrative. We know that it is because she doesn't do it, and would film it and post it to Instagram if she did, but she has so many idiots supporting her that they would buy it and talk about how awful MTV is for treating her that way. I've decided that most of them are the paid accounts, because it makes me feel better about the world to not acknowledge that people actually admire her. Delusion is not only for the Teen Moms!

On 3/25/2017 at 2:22 PM, leighroda said:

David is apparently going to make Kaiser a great man 

just finding the right place to hide Jenelles body ?.

This quote is not showing up right, but I'm leaving it in case it posts correctly. It was about Janelle claiming David is turning Kai into a man. On the Discovery Channel's Murder Chose Me the Shreveport, LA detective Rod Demery says that his mother's murder made him a better detective, so maybe Kai will grow up to be a great law enforcement officer with an understanding of PTSD, brain injuries, and murderers and their victims. Or maybe he will become a counselor of former service members or kids who have grown up with narcissists and sociopaths for parents. 

5 hours ago, MissMel said:

Well yes, but I think that time she had a paid gig to attend.  She couldn't say that because they hadn't broken the fourth wall yet.  

Not that it matters.  I'm a little shocked she hasn't taken off for spring break, myself.

Didn't David become her manager after she fired her last one? He was probably a man and David couldn't handle that, although, even if it were a woman, David needed her gone as part of his control and seclusion of Janelle. In any case, it looks like he isn't doing his job if she is sitting at home not partying for pay during Spring Break. We all know it isn't because she just had a baby and has an infant at home. She went on a romantic weekend at two weeks. Well, that's what they claimed. The drugs aren't going to traffick themselves. Disclaimer: No proof of that, just think there was a secondary reason for them taking a boat out in the middle of the night during winter several weeks ago. 

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Vandy10

Vandy10

5 hours ago, Lm2162 said:

I'm pretty sure Jenelle's "full time" is equivalent to Adam's "50/50 custody," aka bullshit. 

Uh, why is Jenelle saying that Marissa lives with them full time? That can't be true, right? Anyone got the scoop on the custody arrangement with David and his ex-wife/first baby momma?

Well, she replied to my question on Twitter to say that they've had full custody since the week Ensley was born. I'm really hoping someone with skills finds the court order  or it gets reported on The Ashley, because I'm having a hard time believing it. 

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AmyFarrahFowler

AmyFarrahFowler

On 3/25/2017 at 11:22 AM, leighroda said:

David is apparently going to make Kaiser a great man 

just finding the right place to hide Jenelles body ?.

 I'm not a huge Nathan fan, but he's still Kaisers father, which was a decision Jenelle made, not Kai. It makes me so mad that she gives David so much credit, when he probably won't be around in a few years. If I were more vindictive with more free time on my hands I would make a point to save all of these "David is so wonderful" tweets and send them to her when she's giving us the "David was so mean, I was so sad, but I acted like I was happy" after they break up.

Especially when he's being exposed to a man that refers to him as "a little bitch just like his father". What a great role model.

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poopchute

poopchute

18 hours ago, CofCinci said:

She's calling the modular their "forever" home. If the divorce/David does end the house, the flooding will. 

What is up with the windows/shutters here? Is it supposed to look like that? Because it looks like shit.

18 hours ago, CofCinci said:

She's calling the modular their "forever" home. If the divorce/David does end the house, the flooding will. 

What is up with the windows/shutters here? Is it supposed to look like that? Because it looks like shit.

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Mkay

Mkay

7 hours ago, Christina said:

At one of the reunions or clips shows, they showed a montage of her saying, "Dude!" and she claimed she didn't realize she said it as much as she did, along with another phrase, I think. Maybe seeing it broke her of the habit, and they should show her a clip of her being a spiteful and hateful bitch to everyone around her, along with her ignoring her kids, to break her of those habits, too. 

Of course, she would probably just be like Kail and give a long post about how they only film and air a little bit and don't show her playing with the kids or complimenting her mom, because it doesn't fit into their narrative. We know that it is because she doesn't do it, and would film it and post it to Instagram if she did, but she has so many idiots supporting her that they would buy it and talk about how awful MTV is for treating her that way. I've decided that most of them are the paid accounts, because it makes me feel better about the world to not acknowledge that people actually admire her. Delusion is not only for the Teen Moms!

This quote is not showing up right, but I'm leaving it in case it posts correctly. It was about Janelle claiming David is turning Kai into a man. On the Discovery Channel's Murder Chose Me the Shreveport, LA detective Rod Demery says that his mother's murder made him a better detective, so maybe Kai will grow up to be a great law enforcement officer with an understanding of PTSD, brain injuries, and murderers and their victims.  

Just want to jump in to say we have been watching that, too.  Shreveport is a little over an hour from home so it's kind of neat to watch. Even though I live in Tx is close enough that our local news stations are out of Shreveport so I watch to see if we remember any of these.   

 

Back to Jenelle. 

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BitterApple

BitterApple

I've seen some really nice pre-fab homes and I have to say, Jenelle's isn't one of them. I don't like the weird shutter/window thing and the front door area is so narrow and uninviting. I wonder what the plans are for the yard, because as it stands right now they're going to be knee-deep in mud when it rains. 

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GreatKazu

GreatKazu

30 minutes ago, BitterApple said:

I've seen some really nice pre-fab homes and I have to say, Jenelle's isn't one of them. I don't like the weird shutter/window thing and the front door area is so narrow and uninviting. I wonder what the plans are for the yard, because as it stands right now they're going to be knee-deep in mud when it rains. 

Yes, agree about the shutters. Why only one? They look horrible that way.

http://www.inquisitr.com/4089775/teen-mom-2-jenelle-evans-takes-aim-at-mtv-on-twitter/

“We haven’t set a date, but we want to get married either this summer or next summer depending on how quickly we plan it,” Jenelle Evans revealed to MTV News last month. “I’m saying next summer, but he’s saying this summer… We know we want a rustic-themed wedding, nothing too fancy. Something simple, maybe backyard and outdoorsy. We want just close friends and family, not anything crazy.”

Jenelle Evans went on to reveal her excitement about marrying her “loyal” partner.

“I want to marry David because he’s a great father, he’s a great best friend, he’s faithful, he’s loyal to me. It’s the best relationship I’ve ever had,” she gushed.

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lovesnark

lovesnark

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“I want to marry David because he’s a great father, he’s a great best friend, he’s faithful, he’s loyal to me. It’s the best relationship I’ve ever had,” she gushed.

Translation:

David deals with the kids so I can lay on the couch wrapped in a blanket and fuck around on my phone. I hardly know they're there.

I don't have any friends. David told me he's my best friend.

He never lets me out of his sight, so I know he's not cheating on me.

He quit his job when I told him to and I make the money. He has to be loyal to me or he'll be penniless.

The cops haven't been called every week because we're fighting. After we move to the swamp, no one will be able to hear us fighting, so we won't have to worry about someone calling the cops.

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