S05.E10: Week 6: Season Finale

[leighdear]

2 minutes ago, CindyBee said:

Why isn't Joe the Bachelor!??!   

I blame Trump. 

[adhoc]

Joe IS the man.

He totally nailed it with Kendall. Damn. That was awesome. He called her on everything.

[Armchair Critic]

2 minutes ago, CindyBee said:

Why isn't Joe the Bachelor!??!   

I think after fan reaction to Joe getting his heart broken on tonight's show they are going to regret going with Colton

[Mu Shu]

Call me Joe.  I have more bountiful boobs to suckle your young’uns with.  

[CindyBee]

They had the perfect Bachelor that would have gotten ton of buzz and they blew it by picking Colton.

[tennisgurl]

Joe is too good for Kendall. Joe is probably too good for anyone in this franchise. 

[leighdear]

2 minutes ago, Armchair Critic said:

I think after fan reaction to Joe getting his heart broken on tonight's show they are going to regret going with Colton

Sadly, it will make NO difference.  People will hate-watch Colton, but the audience WILL still watch, if only to pick him apart.  And we will, because we always do.  Yes, we're enablers.  *LOL*

[tennisgurl]

How do we have Joe, standing right here, and yet they went COLTON for Bachelor?!?

[saber5055]

Maybe after DWTS Joe can be The Bach. It took a while for Arie. I just hope Joe and Kendall haven't gotten together since BIP ended. I guess we'll find out on ATFR if that's what it's called.

Is everyone suppose to give a speech now before they hand out the rose? Ugh.

Based on what I've seen of Venmo in Paradise, I'd pick Diggie.

[Mu Shu]

They should have brought Diggy in earlier.

[Armchair Critic]

LMAO at the sad trumpet playing for Diggy.

[tennisgurl]

I thought the sad trumpet was going to start playing "Hello Darkness My Old Friend."

[TiredMe]

What’s with Krystal voice giving her rose to Chris in that breathy voice and then mmmm mmmming. I had a viceral ick! Reaction.

Edited September 11, 2018 by TiredMe

[leighdear]

1 minute ago, saber5055 said:

Maybe after DWTS Joe can be The Bach. It took a while for Arie. I just hope Joe and Kendall haven't gotten together since BIP ended. I guess we'll find out on ATFR if that's what it's called.

Is everyone suppose to give a speech now before they hand out the rose? Ugh.

Let Colton find some giggly, brainless twit to date for a few weeks, then the next real Bachelor can be Joe.  He'll be a bit more media savvy y then, and hopefully will bypass turning into an asshat.  That's always a possibility, ya know.  Give a man too much positive attention, and he can start believing his own press.  Then his head blows up and he turns into Ick Vile.  *shudder*

[JenE4]

The trumpeter in the car with Diggy! I just let out the strangest sad oh’ing while laughing—ohhaohhaohhaohha! Poor guy didn’t get enough of a chance—he’s a catch!

[CindyBee]

Diggy has had two shit seasons in paradise; first last year when production was shut down and now this one where he was second to last one to arrive.  Hopefully he has better luck on the reject circuit

[TiredMe]

Took me a bit of reflection to process what a hot mess Kendall is. I’m still shaking my damn head at her. 

[ddiced35]

I always liked Joe but didn’t love him as much as others...until tonight. The way he handled that twit Kendall was SUPERB, and I hope he never looked back to Paradise because he was made for real women in the real world and we need him here. God Kendall is so annoying, I’d get way too much pleasure from smacking her. When I would rather hang out with JORDAN, you are annoying AF.

Edited September 11, 2018 by ddiced35
Typo

[tennisgurl]

"Or couples who just want to bone in a super nice place before they go back to the real world..."

[Mu Shu]

I like Olivia’s bathing suit.

[leighdear]

Oooo, Cassandra got smacked down!  Hard pass, girl!  See Ya!

[CindyBee]

So wait, that's the end of John and Olivia!?  And Cassandra and NZ Jordan!?!

[JenE4]

Oh, no, my cable just went out! Noooo!

[Armchair Critic]

Analiese will fall into anybody who is available's arms, you know she is going to the Fantasy Suite

[leighdear]

And I want to dive into your crotch, Kamil.  

[CindyBee]

I still think Kamil is blinking "help me" at the camera.   

[tennisgurl]

Annalise is so freaking thirsty, that I am actively concerned about any guy she gets interested in. She is practically drooling at the idea of going to the fantasy suite. 

Has anyone checked on Kamil lately? Because, I am truly concerned that he is locked in Annalises basement right now, being forced to watch old Bachelor in Paradise  episodes on an endless loop. 

[dizzyd]

I don't understand the concept of the fantasy suite. (Not in a Colton way, mind you). Are you telling me these people weren't getting it on already? I thought for sure Annalise and Kamil did the deed a few episodes ago.

[JenE4]

Ok, my cable is back but I missed break ups? Oh, man. Who dumped whom in each couple?

[saber5055]

WTHeck, I'd take the FS with whatever dude I was with. Air conditioning, soft big bed, A DOOR! a shower, room service ... I'm all about that after spending a week in some sand-flea-filled open-air bunk bed surrounding by morons.

Jenna looks old enough to be Jordan's mom.

[Armchair Critic]

1 minute ago, dizzyd said:

Are you telling me these people weren't getting it on already?

Corinne and DeMario killed the night cams in the bedrooms for the franchise

[ECM1231]

what did Kevin say to Astrid after the bleep?

[leighdear]

The Fantasy Suites are just sanctioned sex.  Of course several of them have already done the deed, but in sandy, sweaty & salty discomfort.  And probably fewer crabs in the suites.  Maybe. 

[CindyBee]

1 minute ago, JenE4 said:

Ok, my cable is back but I missed break ups? Oh, man. Who dumped whom in each couple?

NZ Jordan dumped Cassandra.   John and Olivia agreed to see other out of paradise, Robby lied to Shu and said the same.   Now waiting for Kevin's breakdown

[Rabithed]

8 minutes ago, Mu Shu said:

I like Olivia’s bathing suit.

Me too!  She has a fabulous figure. She seems like a sweet girl. 

7 minutes ago, leighdear said:

Oooo, Cassandra got smacked down!  Hard pass, girl!  See Ya!

Yeah, that was so cringeworthy!  Ouch. 

[tennisgurl]

I hate the pressure to get engaged immediately at the end of the show. Just get to know each other better, in the actual world! 

[saber5055]

WHAT? They make you pick out a ring and GET ENGAGED if you choose the FS? WTH show.

[Armchair Critic]

Kevin is going to need more therapy after this show. They ruined it by making them feel like they have to come out of the show engaged.

[dizzyd]

I'm still not understanding why they're freaking out about the FS. If they've already done the deed, then what's the problem with a fancier room? And if not, then why can't they pull a John and Olivia?

[Mu Shu]

Kevin is a dolt.

[Stan39]

Call me old-fashioned, but I don’t think going to a nice hotel room to have sex with a person you’re attracted to should make you cry and go home. 

[CindyBee]

This is the worst break up I've seen on this stupid show as I actually like Astrid and Kevin.  

[Armchair Critic]

Ashley I. ruined Kevin! 

[tennisgurl]

Calling it now: Kevin asks Astrid to marry him at the reunion show, after he realizes he made a mistake. 

[saber5055]

2 minutes ago, Stan39 said:

Call me old-fashioned, but I don’t think going to a nice hotel room to have sex with a person you’re attracted to should make you cry and go home. 

I think it's the stipulation that you have to get engaged the morning after that is bringing the tears. It'd do the FS, and sneak out pre-dawn to the airport before anyone saw me.

Kevin needs to be the Bach U.S. version.

Edited September 11, 2018 by saber5055

[Mu Shu]

Kevin has a fucked up looking toe.  Also very ugly crier. 

[phlebas]

WTF Kevin you idiot mouth-breathing child.

I hope Astrid hooks up with the trumpet player who shared the ride with Diggy

[TiredMe]

Call me crazy but I’m believing Kevin and Astrid. I don’t think this is acting. 

[saber5055]

2 minutes ago, tennisgurl said:

Calling it now: Kevin asks Astrid to marry him at the reunion show, after he realizes he made a mistake. 

I hope not, he deserves better, like someone who will actually LISTEN to him. But I think you might be correct about the engagement. To which I say UGH, poor Kevin.

[ddiced35]

Goddamn you both for making me care, Kevin and Astrid!!! And Astrid is freaking awesome; THAT is how you handle a breakup.