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Katie Maloney: She Was Taking Her Shoes Off!

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I am pretty sure the only thing worth talking about with Katie is that horrid orange mess she had on her head last season. Hopefully she saw herself and realized she needed to get to a colorist. I have no idea if it was intentional or an accident, but that shade of orangey blonde was horrible!

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It's kind of surprising Stassi or Kristen never made any comments about the pumpkin colored hair.

 

Kristen hardly had room to talk given she banged Jax and his chunky sweater.  Nevermind that she always looked like someone pulled her from the tumble dry cycle of my dryer and threw her in front of the camera.

 

StASSi was probably too busy planning her birthday celebration.

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I like the last one best. Majority rules (usually), so let me know what y'all want as the subtitle and I'll change/add it. Though I can tell you the gaydar one won't fly because we don't have proof that her boyfriend is gay.

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I looked at the Reddit posted above because I was curious about what Katie wants to do with her life. This is a quote from Katie regarding what she would be doing if she wasn't on VPR :

 

[–]KatieMaloney 1 point 7 hours ago

"I would probably still be working towards stuff in music for film & television. I've tried to maintain my authenticity and stay true to what i want to do, and not stray too far from what i would normally be doing otherwise. "

 

(I hope its okay to quote here.)

 

Katie also apparently has a makeup/ fashion blog (doesn't everyone?) called Pucker & Pout that she talks about in the same interview.

 

Nothing much to say about Katie except the motorboating thing is hilarious!

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Oh yes I do remember now in the very first episode of the series that she said she wants to own a record label someday. I haven't seen her do much of anything related to music though. You'd think she'd tag along with Scheana when she goes to the studio or something.

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It would be nice if they showed ANYONE on this show doing ANYTHING ambitious, wouldn't it?

 

I see Katie as being the VR verison of LC from Laguna Beach. Not in the sense that I think Katie will light the world on fire post-show, but she seems like the nice enough everyday type of girl who is not too polarizing (minus the Tequilla Katie aspect).

Edited by Granimal

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One weird question. Did Katie always have that scar near her mouth? I don't seem to recall it in past seasons, and for some reason it just seems so pronounced in this past season or so. And if it's new (like she hasn't had it since season 1 or before) anyone know what happened? Car accident? Botched surgery? Dog bite? Inquiring minds want to know.

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I was also going to ask whether she's pregnant. She totally looks pregnant on WWHL--the middle (odd cut dress), the boobs, the round face, the thicker/longer hair--she looks pregnant glowing, not just gained weight. Fliptopbox--summarizing for those who missed it--on WWHL the game was Tom had to answer questions about Katie (and motorboat an avatar of Jax if he didn't answer them correctly--and he got all of them wrong) but apparently when Katie was young she fell through a skylight and broke her jaw, ribs, and clavicle, so I assume the scar is from that accident.

Edited by JenE4
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Katie seems to be the most mature of all of them. I think she deserves a lot better than Tom Schwartz and I really hope that she isn't pregnant. Sadly, I thought she looked pregnant as well. I couldn't believe that Schwartz couldn't answer any of those questions about Katie correctly.

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Katie seems to be the most mature of all of them. I think she deserves a lot better than Tom Schwartz and I really hope that she isn't pregnant. Sadly, I thought she looked pregnant as well. I couldn't believe that Schwartz couldn't answer any of those questions about Katie correctly.

Looks like the producers didn't give schwartz enough of Katie's back story when they paired them up

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I was also going to ask whether she's pregnant. She totally looks pregnant on WWHL--the middle (odd cut dress), the boobs, the round face, the thicker/longer hair--she looks pregnant glowing, not just gained weight. Fliptopbox--summarizing for those who missed it--on WWHL the game was Tom had to answer questions about Katie (and motorboat an avatar of Jax if he didn't answer them correctly--and he got all of them wrong) but apparently when Katie was young she fell through a skylight and broke her jaw, ribs, and clavicle, so I assume the scar is from that accident.

 

I *totally* think she is pregnant based on her WWHL appearance. Yeah it wasn't just "oh she gained 5-10 pounds" -- it was a significant change to her appearance.  If so....ehhh, well, hopefully it will make Schwartz grow up and stop making out with rando girls (and boys...)

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Yeah I did see the end of WWHL and caught the part about her accident. But before that the scar was puzzling me. Now we know. Mystery solved.

 

Since we are all pretty sure she's pregnant do we take bets on if it's Schwartz's? Enough time has elapsed since the season's filming and now the reunion coming up....it's possible (but not that likely, I guess) she could have moved on and found someone else. Just a thought. And I hope if it is Schwartz's kid they pick a good name. None of that "Nevaeh" nonsense.

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Yeah I did see the end of WWHL and caught the part about her accident. But before that the scar was puzzling me. Now we know. Mystery solved.

Since we are all pretty sure she's pregnant do we take bets on if it's Schwartz's? Enough time has elapsed since the season's filming and now the reunion coming up....it's possible (but not that likely, I guess) she could have moved on and found someone else. Just a thought. And I hope if it is Schwartz's kid they pick a good name. None of that "Nevaeh" nonsense.

If that's the case, next season will be one giant episode of Maury.
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I also wonder if Lisa offers any type of maternity leave? She seems to pride herself on treating her staff like family....but does she offer them benefits? Sick days? Anything like a regular job? I kinda doubt it. Katie and Schwartz better start saving those tips now!

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Add me to the VPRers whose first thought was that Katie is going to grace the world with a little person who is going to panick at the thought of a pan of brownies or working more than the length of a sitcom.  Her face is indeed fuller (and not just from the extensions), the cut of her dress was suspicious and she seemed to sit in the same position the entire time (maybe trying hard to conceal a bump.)   I also thought it might have been telling that one of the questions asked was what name Katie would bestow upon a female child.  (Parker?  Ick.) 

 

I did fill with glee over thinking how StASSi would probably be pissed that the motorboating queen's womb was rented before hers.  Hee.

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Is it possible she was dumb enough to get implants? Her chest looked more inflated than the result of a push-up bra.

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I don't know. I'm still not buying it. Andy asked whether they're going to have kids and what their firstborn's name would be. And after both answers Andy said, "Ok. Can't wait until the reunion." Well, it's possible that he said that in response to two OTHER of their comments, but last night I had it all in my head that she's pregnant and they're going to announce it at the reunion, so I took those possibly unrelated comments as evidence.

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It's possible that Katie really just gained weight. I'm a stress eater, and I gained nearly 20 pounds last year. If I didn't hear the awful, "Damn girl, you're getting big!" It was the slightly less offensive, "Are you pregnant?"

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I don't know. I'm still not buying it. Andy asked whether they're going to have kids and what their firstborn's name would be. And after both answers Andy said, "Ok. Can't wait until the reunion." Well, it's possible that he said that in response to two OTHER of their comments, but last night I had it all in my head that she's pregnant and they're going to announce it at the reunion, so I took those possibly unrelated comments as evidence.

Me either. Even if Katie is a stress eater, she's managed to maintain her relatively small size for 3 seasons now, even when we knew she drank pretty often and heavily. Hence Tequila Katie. She knows she's on tv and a semi-public figure. Plus she waits tables, and anyone who's ever been in the service industry knows that's a workout on its own. Add to it those SUR girls usually wear heels or other fancy shoes that aren't those fugly non-slip Shoes For Crews monstrosities. I am not buying any "just a pushup bra" bullshit. Sorry Katie! A bra doesn't make your stomach look ambiguous in a wrap dress nor make you look overall a good 30lbs heavier. Just, no.

Edited by fliptopbox
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I don't know. I'm still not buying it. Andy asked whether they're going to have kids and what their firstborn's name would be. And after both answers Andy said, "Ok. Can't wait until the reunion." Well, it's possible that he said that in response to two OTHER of their comments, but last night I had it all in my head that she's pregnant and they're going to announce it at the reunion, so I took those possibly unrelated comments as evidence.

Wow! You're absolutely right! I caught the "are you guys ready for kids?" question, but the firstborn girl's name totally went over my head. That's a pretty strange question to ask on one of those "how well do you know your partner?" deals. To me Katie didn't look like someone who had gained weight, she looked pregnant (nothing to do with weight). She just had that look where I immediately saw her and said "Pregnant?"

 

ETA: Okay I read the twitter post linked above, and someone had tweeted "hmm" in response to Katie's assertion that it was just a bra and Katie replied, "No hmm about it go be a jerk somewhere else." So now I'm thinking maybe she isn't pregnant. I don't think she'd be all up in arms about it if she wasn't actually hurt by this.

Edited by Granimal
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I thought she looked pregnant, and if she is not pregnant, she should seriously rethink that dress. It totally looks like a maternity wrap around dress, I had quite a few for work during my years of perpetual pregnancy (5 kids in 7 years). Of course none of my wrap around dresses were shiny and red, I guess I am not that "fasion forward".

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I'm still standing by the pregnancy prediction. She can act all pissy now on Twitter because of the speculation, because she's probably not supposed to be talking about it. At all, lest she incur the wrath from the powers that be at Bravo. And I can't blame her for not wanting to be bullied into announcing that kind of news over Twitter to a bunch of pushy fans. She has every right to make it public when she's ready. Which will probably be at the reunion. I say this because a pushup bra does not affect your whole body. Just not buying it.

 

And if she really did just gain some weight that's fine too, but like I said...she's always been significantly smaller the entire run of the show. Waitressing is a physical job, that alone is your exercise for the day. Unless she quit SUR and suddenly has this super sedentary lifestyle I am not buying that it's just some extra "love pounds" as Stassi would put it.

Edited by fliptopbox
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If she wasn't supposed to announce it yet, she could have just not responded at all and let people talk. Responding makes it look even more suspicious. If she was lying, she should have at least said she gained weight, it'd have been much more believable than a push-up bra.

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I am sorry to say this, but Katie always looks like she smells bad. Just me? I know it is terrible. I've been fighting posting it for a while. Evilness won.

Edited by SuzWhat
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I am sorry to say this, but Katie always looks like she smells bad. Just me? I know it is terrible. I've been fighting posting it for a while. Evilness won.

 

Hmm no can't say I ever thought this.  She always looks clean and kempt to me.  Now, replace Katie with "Kristin" and yes, I'll co-sign...

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Hmm no can't say I ever thought this. She always looks clean and kempt to me. Now, replace Katie with "Kristin" and yes, I'll co-sign...

Add in Tom Sandoval and I'll co-sign. I can only imagine what that apartment smelled like when Kristen and Tom lived there together.

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Add in Tom Sandoval and I'll co-sign. I can only imagine what that apartment smelled like when Kristen and Tom lived there together.

 

Hopefully the Nugget is not only the smartest person she's ever known in her life but also the cleanest.

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I am sorry to say this, but Katie always looks like she smells bad. Just me? I know it is terrible. I've been fighting posting it for a while. Evilness won.

 

I can't explain why, but I totally agree with this. I think it was the orange hair she had last seasons. The dark roots always made her look like she needed a shower.

 

But her coworkers/costars? aren't off the hook either. I'm not about to go rewatch S1 but if I recall correctly they all mentioned not washing their uniforms for days/weeks at a time or going straight to work without showering. Luckily, or unlucky for those who have eaten at Sur, the place is filled with patchouli scented candles (that's not even a dig at Giuliana, it's 100% true) to mask the laundry day stench.

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I really hope Schwartz doesn't give in to her 6 month ultimatum. I want better for Katie.

If they were already having a sexless relationship in their twenties, I don't care how much Schwartz claims to be madly in love with her again. She'll be in for a sad, passionless, roomate-style marriage.

I wish she would see how much better she could do than this two-timer.

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I really hope Schwartz doesn't give in to her 6 month ultimatum. I want better for Katie.

If they were already having a sexless relationship in their twenties, I don't care how much Schwartz claims to be madly in love with her again. She'll be in for a sad, passionless, roomate-style marriage.

I wish she would see how much better she could do than this two-timer.

Especially when he obviously doesn't have a problem making out (and sadly probably more) with a random stranger. Yeah, I hope she's moved on to a relationship with a guy who wants to be with her.

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