Spoilers and Speculation: Clink Boom and Cheese Fondue

[ulkis]

13 minutes ago, TeeVee329 said:

Here's a question - why would Helena hang on to the embryo once Stavros was dead?  She presumably viewed Valentin as bastard trash, just like Alexis.

I guess if Valentin is lying to Lulu about Helena drugging him, Helena still thought it was Stavros'.

The timeline, I got nothin'.

Edited December 10, 2016 by ulkis

[stlbf]

This is total bullshit. None of it makes any sense timeline wise. None of it.

[Ambrosefolly]

20 hours ago, Michel said:

No, and that makes Franco's actions even worse.  Each time Tom has been around Elizabeth hasn't even been intentional.  They've so far been coincidental, unintentional, and accidental.  Even Franco knows that, yet he continues to act like he's doing it on purpose.

So basically one of the few people that served an adequate amount of time for a crime is the one being continually punished. Ava murders Kate Howard for reasons...she deserves to be happy with her daughters, Nina sexually assaults a woman and kidnaps her child...editor of a fashion magazine, Jason:hitman...married with 2 boys and a baby on the way, Franco: serial killer and pseudo raptist...tumor made him do it and having a relationship with the mother of one of his victims, Sonny, murders AJ, an interesting legacy character...out after a few months with a new daughter. I could go on.

[LeftPhalange]

I'm confused about this timeline that we're supposed to believe. Daphne drugged, sexually assaulted, and stole jizz from Valentin, which was used to fertilize an egg stolen from Lulu in 2013. But the last time Griffin and Tree had sex with Claud was a decade ago? So this kid is too old to be Lulu's AND there's no way Claud could've ever believably passed her off as the spawn of a doctor priest or a tree?

[stlbf]

44 minutes ago, LeftPhalange said:

I'm confused about this timeline that we're supposed to believe. Daphne drugged, sexually assaulted, and stole jizz from Valentin, which was used to fertilize an egg stolen from Lulu in 2013. But the last time Griffin and Tree had sex with Claud was a decade ago? So this kid is too old to be Lulu's AND there's no way Claud could've ever believably passed her off as the spawn of a doctor priest or a tree?

I guess the show's writers have now discovered time travel shows. Because a god damn unknown TARDIS or the DC's LOT has apparently come into play. Or perhaps the Flash's Flashpoint has somehow effected this earth too. Makes about as much sense as this shit storm. 

[yowsah1]

Re: The cage story, I'm calling it now. The cage and shock collar will turn out to be something Tom set up for Kiki  (despite not one shred of foreshadowing that he was planning such a thing, because GH'so crack writing team are above such silly things as "motivation" and "logic"), and Franco/Kiki sticking him on there will be played as "righteously turning the tables".

[dubbel zout]

14 hours ago, ulkis said:

Valentin was drugged by Daphne to get the sample.

AGAIN with the lack of consent. Why go this way? Why not have Helena pay Valentin a boatload of cash? That feels more likely for both of these characters, even if she was supposed to be terrified of him. 

Poor Charlotte. A rape baby on both sides.

[ulkis]

3 minutes ago, dubbel zout said:

AGAIN with the lack of consent. Why go this way? Why not have Helena pay Valentin a boatload of cash? That feels more likely for both of these characters, even if she was supposed to be terrified of him. 

Poor Charlotte. A rape baby on both sides.

Valentin hated Helena. I don't think he would do anything that would please her for cash.

[Ambrosefolly]

3 hours ago, yowsah1 said:

Re: The cage story, I'm calling it now. The cage and shock collar will turn out to be something Tom set up for Kiki  (despite not one shred of foreshadowing that he was planning such a thing, because GH'so crack writing team are above such silly things as "motivation" and "logic"), and Franco/Kiki sticking him on there will be played as "righteously turning the tables".

You're right. Can't have a person that went prison and paid more a debt to society than the assholes that populate this show just try to keep his head down and actually be sorry.

Edited December 10, 2016 by Ambrosefolly

[LexieLily]

I'm glad for Laura's sake that she has Kevin but at this particular moment I really wish she wasn't dating him - ALL of the key players in this story (Laura, Lulu, Dante, Valentin, Nina, even Charlotte) could use some intense sessions with a psychiatrist. 

[ulkis]

23 minutes ago, LexieLily said:

I'm glad for Laura's sake that she has Kevin but at this particular moment I really wish she wasn't dating him - ALL of the key players in this story (Laura, Lulu, Dante, Valentin, Nina, even Charlotte) could use some intense sessions with a psychiatrist. 

Even Charlotte? Especially Charlotte, I'd say, heh.

[dubbel zout]

2 hours ago, ulkis said:

Valentin hated Helena. I don't think he would do anything that would please her for cash.

He's been whining about being the poor relation, so I could see asking for a boatload of cash and Helena being desperate enough to pay.

[KerleyQ]

On 12/10/2016 at 11:32 AM, dubbel zout said:

AGAIN with the lack of consent. Why go this way? Why not have Helena pay Valentin a boatload of cash? That feels more likely for both of these characters, even if she was supposed to be terrified of him. 

Poor Charlotte. A rape baby on both sides.

 

On 12/10/2016 at 11:36 AM, ulkis said:

Valentin hated Helena. I don't think he would do anything that would please her for cash.

They could have had Valentin somehow pull off a switch, so Helena never knew he was the real father of that embryo.  It would solve  lot of the non-timeline-related issues here:  No consent issues (which this show just cannot handle properly, yet they seem obsessed with featuring them); Helena having held onto the embryo past Stavros's death as her link to Stavros makes sense if she didn't know it was Valentin's sperm that fertilized the egg; and it doesn't contradict the "Helena is terrified of Valentin" angle.  The timeline still sucks ass, but those issues would be solved.  

As for the timeline, considering that the Crichton-Clark mess is so closely tied to the Jake Doe is Jason story, the baby resulting from that embryo should be within approximately one year of the impending JaSam baby.  And, of course, my previous objections that there is just no way that a child who is old enough to have been mistaken for the child of either Griffin/Claudette or Nathan/Claudette during their off-screen triangle that predates their arrivals in PC could possibly be the baby born of the StaVaLu embryo - unless, of course, Valentin is a time lord.  

[dubbel zout]

11 minutes ago, KerleyQ said:

Valentin is a time lord.

That would explain why people fear him, at least.

They could have had Valentin somehow pull off a switch, so Helena never knew he was the real father of that embryo.  It would solve  lot of the non-timeline-related issues here:  No consent issues

Where would Lulu's egg have come from? The surrogate stuff with Maxie happened after Lulu was defrosted. 

Edited December 11, 2016 by dubbel zout

[LeftPhalange]

Is the embryo everyone thought was the Stavros/Lulu embryo really the Valentin/Lulu embryo or are there two, meaning the Stavros/Lulu one is still out there? Also, Helena didn't care much for Stavros so why would she care about keeping a "piece of him" (ugh) alive after he died?

ETA, ignore the last question. I'm getting Stavros and Stefan confused. 

Edited December 11, 2016 by LeftPhalange

[Melgaypet]

9 minutes ago, LeftPhalange said:

Also, Helena didn't care much for Stavros so why would she care about keeping a "piece of him" (ugh) alive after he died?

Huh? Helena was obsessed with Stavros, to a creepily incestuous degree. Stefan was the son she hated.

[LeftPhalange]

5 minutes ago, Melgaypet said:

Huh? Helena was obsessed with Stavros, to a creepily incestuous degree. Stefan was the son she hated.

Ooops. I'm getting my dead Cassadines confused.

[KerleyQ]

30 minutes ago, dubbel zout said:

Where would Lulu's egg have come from? The surrogate stuff with Maxie happened after Lulu was defrosted. 

Like I said, it would have solved a lot of the non-timeline-related problems with the story.  The timeline on this story is fucked five ways from Sunday, at least.  

[movingtargetgal]

3 hours ago, LeftPhalange said:

Ooops. I'm getting my dead Cassadines confused.

LEFTPHANGE it is so easy to confuse our dead Cassadines between those who are dead dead, frozen dead, defrosted former dead and faking dead it is really hard to keep track of them.

[IWantCandy71]

I'm not watching, but a timeline plot point discrepancy for a family that once tried to freeze the world? That has frozen it's family members and frozen just about everything else, apparently an embryo as well? We will probably find out they froze-or sped up- time.  And we're just supposed to nod and go "Helena. Reasons. Commercial Break".  Remember Alive!Jake? Yep. None of it. Makes sense. Ever.

The show rarely tries, and they've honestly NEVER tried to explain the Cassadines. They are the go to for "crazy, stupid stories" and let's  be real-TPTB think their audience is stupid. There's no other explanation for the outrageous laziness. They won't bother explaining it, because they know they don't have to. Just reading all this would infuriate me, if I cared enough about this show to bother wasting the energy that getting angry would expend.

Disclaimer that if they did "speed up" time, it wouldn't be the first soap story, or character, it happened to. My dusty old memory recalls a few stories on Days of Our Lives, that glowing bastion of  oftentimes dumb, where things happened that couldn't possibly have happened-and babies were made that couldn't possibly have been made. It reminds me of that movie "Soapdish" and Whoopi Goldberg being told she had to bring someone back to life who had his head shrunken on screen, or something like that.

Gotta love soaps, right? *sigh*

[Oracle42]

Quote

Rose Schwartz: The guy was killed in an auto accident! I looked it up! He was driving in the Yukon in a pink convertible, to visit his brother who’s an ex-con named Frances, when a tractor trailer comes along and decapitates him. You know what that means? It means he doesn’t have a head! How am I supposed to write for a guy who doesn’t have a head? He’s got no lips, no vocal cords. What do you want me to do?

Edited December 12, 2016 by Oracle42

[dubbel zout]

30 minutes ago, IWantCandy71 said:

they've honestly NEVER tried to explain the Cassadines

The Ice Princess story, while completely wacky, had pretty strong internal logic. But it was written back when stories weren't just a series of plot points to race through. The current writers are banking on everyone having vague memories of that story and thinking, "Right, freezing people is what the Cassadines do. It all makes sense." No, it doesn't. They didn't freeze people willy-nilly. There was a whole buildup to it.

Edited December 12, 2016 by dubbel zout

[IWantCandy71]

The only internal logic I remember from the Ice Princess story is that Mikkos was cray cray. Not that it matters. From my point of view, this show has lazy writers who haven't bothered to truly explain things for many years now. It frustrates me-to the point of not watching. And I consider myself a pretty forgiving, patient person. I will overlook many things, many times. One thing I have a *really* hard time overlooking, is being talked down to in the narrative of a movie or TV show. Don't be lazy, and then tell me I'm just too stupid to think for myself, or too stupid to get it. NO-I don't think everything must be spelled out. But I *do* think that if the average viewer cannot deduce or reach the same logical conclusions the characters come to, there is a flaw in the logic of your story telling. Again, not watching-but if LULU-the person who was kidnapped-can't remember what year she was kidnapped, and doesn't have a moment where she goes "eh?" at the age of the kid, the audience has been talked down to and disrespected, and that turns me off. Forgive me dubbel zout, I am not aiming my ire at you. I have just come from discussing Sherlock-LOL-yet another show where the show runners think they can write what they want and we are just gonna smile and swallow it. I haaaate that kind of stuff. So much.

[Fellaway]

Is Tonya Walker Reprising Olivia Jerome on GH?

Um, much as I like TW, I hope not!

[dubbel zout]

If she doesn't kill at least three characters, it's not worth it.

[LeftPhalange]

13 minutes ago, dubbel zout said:

If she doesn't kill at least three characters, it's not worth it.

With her sister Ava being one of them.

[tvgoddess]

Nope, not happening.

[Auntie Velvet]

I can't remember how I stumbled across this, so obviously grain of salt, but I read a few days ago that LAURA is Charlotte's mother. How fun, right?

I think the gist of it was that Laura and Stavros are Charlotte's parents, BUT there is another little girl out there about the same age, who was living at that house on the island, who is Lulu's and...Valentine's I guess. 

This has been another edition of "Really?!!!!.... With Auntie Velvet."

Edited to add that I found the link. 

Edited December 14, 2016 by Auntie Velvet
http://www.celebdirtylaundry.com/2016/general-hospital-gh-spoilers-bombshell-shocker-valentin-lies-charlottes-mom-is-laura-lulu-athenas-mother/

[Auntie Velvet]

Sorry, I'm royally forking up the editing. In case the link isn't above, it's: http://www.celebdirtylaundry.com/2016/general-hospital-gh-spoilers-bombshell-shocker-valentin-lies-charlottes-mom-is-laura-lulu-athenas-mother/

[LexieLily]

1 hour ago, Auntie Velvet said:

I can't remember how I stumbled across this, so obviously grain of salt, but I read a few days ago that LAURA is Charlotte's mother. How fun, right?

I think the gist of it was that Laura and Stavros are Charlotte's parents, BUT there is another little girl out there about the same age, who was living at that house on the island, who is Lulu's and...Valentine's I guess. 

This has been another edition of "Really?!!!!.... With Auntie Velvet."

Edited to add that I found the link. 

That might be even grosser than Lulu/Stavros being her parents. HOW is this one possible?

[TeeVee329]

7 hours ago, Fellaway said:

Is Tonya Walker Reprising Olivia Jerome on GH?

Um, much as I like TW, I hope not!

Ditto.  I like Tonya Walker a lot (though I primarily know her from OLTL as Alex Olanov), but Olivia Jerome would be sooo redundant.  We have Ava and we have Julian, what could Olivia provide that's missing?

[Badsamaritan]

8 hours ago, Auntie Velvet said:

I can't remember how I stumbled across this, so obviously grain of salt, but I read a few days ago that LAURA is Charlotte's mother. How fun, right?

I think the gist of it was that Laura and Stavros are Charlotte's parents, BUT there is another little girl out there about the same age, who was living at that house on the island, who is Lulu's and...Valentine's I guess. 

This has been another edition of "Really?!!!!.... With Auntie Velvet."

Edited to add that I found the link. 

You know, I'd almost prefer they go the GL Reva route and make Charlotte Lulu's clone rather than her daughter. Honestly, I'm kinda surprised Uncle Frank hasn't gone to that well, especially with the Cassadines involved. At least the timeline as far as Tree/Dr. Priest thinking she's their daughter vs. being Lulu's thermos baby could make a little more sense. I'm positive Helena had DNA samples of all the Spencers and anyone else who had the misfortune to get locked down on the island. Kinda like an alien abduction with all the probing.

[IWantCandy71]

Quote

what could Olivia provide that's missing

She's Griffin's real mommy? Since Anna and Griffin have a bond,  I've kinda figured she was his real mom for a while now. As if the horrible, awful, no good, very bad Jeromes need yet another reason to continue to plague this show with yet another family member.

Edited December 14, 2016 by IWantCandy71

[ulkis]

2 hours ago, Badsamaritan said:

You know, I'd almost prefer they go the GL Reva route and make Charlotte Lulu's clone rather than her daughter. Honestly, I'm kinda surprised Uncle Frank hasn't gone to that well, especially with the Cassadines involved. At least the timeline as far as Tree/Dr. Priest thinking she's their daughter vs. being Lulu's thermos baby could make a little more sense. I'm positive Helena had DNA samples of all the Spencers and anyone else who had the misfortune to get locked down on the island. Kinda like an alien abduction with all the probing.

If they did that, Dante would probably cheat on her with the clone in a couple weeks when she's old enough.

[Harmony233]

I loved Olivia Jerome but its best she's left dead I don't want these writers ruining it.

[rur]

56 minutes ago, IWantCandy71 said:

She's Griffin's real mommy? Since Anna and Griffin have a bond,  I've kinda figured she was his real mom for a while now. As if the horrible, awful, no good, very bad Jeromes need yet another reason to continue to plague this show with yet another family member.

I would have liked to have seen this development when Griffin first showed up, since that would have fit into history nicely.

Now, if TW does decide to reprise the role of Olivia, I'd like for her to be Griffin's mother, but have her admit that Duke was not the father. She would acknowledge she'd been so cuckoo for Duke that she lied about the identity of Griffin's father. 

That could be the truth that Valentin was trying to tell Anna was right in front of her eyes. 

ETA: If that's not possible, then have Olivia reveal that Duke was never in a Turkish prison; instead, he'd been living with her all those years, fathering all kinds of children with her, and helping her run all sorts of illegal operations, preferably, in cahoots with Faison.  Maybe that would get Anna off the "Duke Was A Saint Who Deserves Justice" bandwagon. 

Edited December 14, 2016 by rur

[TeeVee329]

Quote

Dante discovers the murder weapon.  {Dec 26}

Whose murder is this referring to?  Is this show about to murder someone as the cliffhanger leading into Christmas?!?!

[dubbel zout]

Tom? Morgan?

[ulkis]

Pretty sure it's Tom.

[TeeVee329]

You're right, Tom's totally the obvious choice.

I can see it now.  We see Franco and Liz enjoying the holiday with her sons*.  Cut to Tom Baker's bloody body laying in the snow or something.

* though Jake's the only one on-screen, natch.

[dubbel zout]

2 minutes ago, TeeVee329 said:

We see Franco and Liz enjoying the holiday with her sons*.  Cut to Tom Baker's bloody body laying in the snow or something.

* though Jake's the only one on-screen, natch.

More likely the boys will be upstairs playing with their presents. Heh.

[TeeVee329]

What could Liz do, Cameron and Aiden BEGGED to go to Audrey's. #eyeroll

Edited December 14, 2016 by TeeVee329

[WendyCR72]

Cam needs growth serum for Christmas.

[Ambrosefolly]

7 hours ago, TeeVee329 said:

What could Liz do, Cameron and Aiden BEGGED to go to Audrey's. #eyeroll

If Franco was going to be there, I would beg too.

[IWantCandy71]

23 hours ago, rur said:

That could be the truth that Valentin was trying to tell Anna was right in front of her eyes. 

ETA: If that's not possible, then have Olivia reveal that Duke was never in a Turkish prison; instead, he'd been living with her all those years, fathering all kinds of children with her, and helping her run all sorts of illegal operations, preferably, in cahoots with Faison.  Maybe that would get Anna off the "Duke Was A Saint Who Deserves Justice" bandwagon. 

As someone who has enjoyed Duke in the past, but *always* felt he wasn't much better than the other mobsters, I think this would be FUN-ee. It must happen. It would be worth it, just to shut Anna up about Dewq.

Dante finds a murder weapon on December 26th? Merry Christmas, everyone. Only on GH.

[ulkis]

Cable guide spoilers

- Jordan offers Curtis an opportunity with the PCPD. {Dec 29}
- Nathan past comes back to haunt him {Dec 29} Nathan gets devastating news. {Dec 28} #Naxie
- Anna turns to hypnotherapy. {Dec 27}
- Hayden's recovery comes at a price. {Dec 28}. #Fayden
- Carly wonders if Sonny can ever truly change his ways. {Dec 29} #CarSon

smh at the last one.

[TeeVee329]

3 minutes ago, ulkis said:

Carly wonders if Sonny can ever truly change his ways. {Dec 29} #CarSon

That reminds me - notice that at no point during this story since Morgan's death has Sonny offered to leave the mob.

Quote

- Anna turns to hypnotherapy. {Dec 27}

I've already spoken out about how I don't like Anna's story, but I will watch these scenes if Kevin's doing the hypnotizing.  If it's Andre, forget it.

Quote

Nathan past comes back to haunt him {Dec 29} Nathan gets devastating news. {Dec 28}

Oh geez, the last time Nathan's past came back to haunt him, we got stuck with Claudette.

[Oracle42]

5 minutes ago, ulkis said:

Hayden's recovery comes at a price.

She becomes a zombie and eats Finn?

[LeftPhalange]

We JUST had to deal with someone from Tree's past coming back to "haunt" him. Why do we have to go through this again so soon.

[ulkis]

Maybe he's leaving. Either that and it's totally opposite and it's just dumb wacky antics to add some suspense to the wedding.