The Girls: Are they really that clueless?

[lovesnark]

12 hours ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

I am 53 and my parents were kind, loving people who never laid a hand on me in terms of corporal punishment but THEY RAN THE SHOW, especially my dad.  You are upset?  Go cry.  You want ice cream for dinner?  Try again.  You WILL tow the line, it is OUR HOUSE and OUR MORTGAGE, thanks for asking.  If I (or my sibs) were upset, they sat in the backyard, having a cigarette (it WAS the 70's) and a cocktail and really were not bothered by their youngest having angst.

Chloe bugs me the most - her crying is just......just buck it up, girl.  You don't know what you are doing, just admit it.

No, most 16 yr old kids are respectful of adults, are working hard at grades, sports and other activities.  It has nothing to do with public schools, it has everything to with parenting.  Like I have said before, parents need to be PLUGGED INTO THE KID'S LIVES.  You can be 2000 miles away and be present.  

The 80's to me, became VERY child-centric and it went too far and stayed there.  Upset kid?  Let's talk it out, let's interface a solution.  No, let's go back to 1974 when you got punished, lol.  Not with force but you felt it.

Bravo! My kids were born in 1985 & 1990 and a whole lot of their friends had no concept of discipline or consequences for their actions. Their friends were dumbstruck to learn that phone privileges had been taken away and/or my kid was grounded for mouthing off, not doing chores, etc. Being held accountable was a foreign concept to a lot of them and  I remember a few of them telling my kid to call CPS because my not allowing him to use the phone was child abuse? My dearest friend readily admits she never disciplined her kids because "she didn't want to hurt their feelings". Her kids are adults now and two of them are mean, disrespectful bitches and they treat her like shit. All four of them had no idea how to take care of themselves when they went off to college because they  were never expected to do ANYTHING for themselves besides doing well in school. Great! They graduated high school with honors and a 4.0 GPA. But, they didn't know how to use a vacuum cleaner, do laundry, make ramen noodles, use a dishwasher or pay bills.

I don't think any of the girls on this show have ever been told no and all of them.believe they're such special snowflakes, raising the child they CHOSE to bring into the world will be their parent's responsibility when it gets hard or interferes with their social life.

[Mrs. Hanson]

3 hours ago, lovesnark said:

My dearest friend readily admits she never disciplined her kids because "she didn't want to hurt their feelings".

Yes and I want to be clear:  I never wanted to nor intended to hurt my kid's feelings, nor do I believe I ever did.  But discomfort?  Agitation?  Sore feelings over being told no?  Yep.  Not all the times as I gotta say, kids were pretty chill.  (Thank you Jesus.)  Once (and only once) my older one (who is THE most mellow dude, ever) got a little lippy. He was 5 or 6?  I warned him once, he did it again, and then I followed through on the threat:  No bedding on the bed that night, only a bare mattress.  He lived.  And the lipping off stopped.  And he had to make the bed the next day when I gave him his bedding back.

[readheaded]

On 9/11/2018 at 2:58 PM, Mrs. Hanson said:

Yes and I want to be clear:  I never wanted to nor intended to hurt my kid's feelings, nor do I believe I ever did.  But discomfort?  Agitation?  Sore feelings over being told no?  Yep.  Not all the times as I gotta say, kids were pretty chill.  (Thank you Jesus.)  Once (and only once) my older one (who is THE most mellow dude, ever) got a little lippy. He was 5 or 6?  I warned him once, he did it again, and then I followed through on the threat:  No bedding on the bed that night, only a bare mattress.  He lived.  And the lipping off stopped.  And he had to make the bed the next day when I gave him his bedding back.

My oldest is now 22, but when he was younger he slammed his door.  He was told not to slam his door, but still he did it again.  He was warned one more time with the threat that the next time, he'd lose the door.  He was a little surprised the next time he slammed the door and my husband didn't say anything at all, but just went up and took the door off.  Once he got the door back, he never slammed it again.

Kids have to know you say what you mean and you mean what you say.

[Mrs. Hanson]

1 hour ago, readheaded said:

My oldest is now 22, but when he was younger he slammed his door.  He was told not to slam his door, but still he did it again.  He was warned one more time with the threat that the next time, he'd lose the door.  He was a little surprised the next time he slammed the door and my husband didn't say anything at all, but just went up and took the door off.  Once he got the door back, he never slammed it again.

Kids have to know you say what you mean and you mean what you say.

Is your husband my dad, lol?  My dad threatened the same thing and I listened.  I knew he meant business and never slammed a door since.  Like never, lol.

[ShaNaeNae]

I’m in an Unexpected Updates Facebook group. Under one of the pics of Timmy, a lady posted thanking the group owner for updating the page with pics of Timmy. She said she is Caelins grandma and McKayla blocked the woman on Facebook and Instagram after she stood up for Caelin during one of their many fights. McKayla is a nasty piece of work just like her mom. This isn’t the first time she’s done something like that. 

[gunderda]

On 9/15/2018 at 11:27 AM, ShaNaeNae said:

I’m in an Unexpected Updates Facebook group. Under one of the pics of Timmy, a lady posted thanking the group owner for updating the page with pics of Timmy. She said she is Caelins grandma and McKayla blocked the woman on Facebook and Instagram after she stood up for Caelin during one of their many fights. McKayla is a nasty piece of work just like her mom. This isn’t the first time she’s done something like that. 

Not sure it speaks that well of a grown women to throw that dirty laundry onto Facebook though.  Caelin can easily share photos with his side of the family if McKayla is having social media temper tantrum.

[b2H]

Are the girls really that clueless?

Well, let's look at their situations.  Most of them come from moms who went through the same scenario at the same age.  Some are third generation with this nonsense.  Of course, we can't learn from our mistakes and prevent our daughters from going down the same road (which, by the way, is part of being a parent), so of course the girls are clueless.  No one took the time to talk to the girls about how they came to be, themselves.

And then you have the media, glamorizing one of the hardest jobs in the world.  It's all fun and games being pregnant and getting all the attention, but then labor happens and that's the high point of the job for the next 18 years.  No one tells them this.  No one exposes them to prevention tools.   No one exposes them to all-night crying; midnight feedings; boyfriends that cheat on you and leave you holding the baby for the next two decades.  You have Bible dad wandering around in a daze because this happened, but I'll bet the s-- word has never been mentioned in his household, because RELIGION!!!!!!

Everyone one of these families is poor and white and in distressed economic areas, so what else do these girls have to look forward to?

And I say this, having gotten pregnant in college, while my daughter did the same darned thing.  It made it easier to walk her through the alternatives, as I'd walked a mile in her shoes, but she was neither clueless nor poor.  There's still a blind eye to terminating pregnancies in this society, so when the awful announcement is made, the decision to carry to term is also made, not considering that these moms are still children themselves.  Their parents (if they're still together, otherwise, step parents) are stuck with the responsibility of raising yet another child, while mom-child goes out and gets pregnant again because, well, who's going to stop her?

This show grates on my nerves because it doesn't have to be this way.  Can you tell?  ;-)

Edited October 8, 2018 by b2H

[Scarlett45]

3 hours ago, b2H said:

Are the girls really that clueless?

Well, let's look at their situations.  Most of them come from moms who went through the same scenario at the same age.  Some are third generation with this nonsense.  Of course, we can't learn from our mistakes and prevent our daughters from going down the same road (which, by the way, is part of being a parent), so of course the girls are clueless.  No one took the time to talk to the girls about how they came to be, themselves.

And then you have the media, glamorizing one of the hardest jobs in the world.  It's all fun and games being pregnant and getting all the attention, but then labor happens and that's the high point of the job for the next 18 years.  No one tells them this.  No one exposes them to prevention tools.   No one exposes them to all-night crying; midnight feedings; boyfriends that cheat on you and leave you holding the baby for the next two decades.  You have Bible dad wandering around in a daze because this happened, but I'll bet the s-- word has never been mentioned in his household, because RELIGION!!!!!!

Everyone one of these families is poor and white and in distressed economic areas, so what else do these girls have to look forward to?

And I say this, having gotten pregnant in college, while my daughter did the same darned thing.  It made it easier to walk her through the alternatives, as I'd walked a mile in her shoes, but she was neither clueless nor poor.  There's still a blind eye to terminating pregnancies in this society, so when the awful announcement is made, the decision to carry to term is also made, not considering that these moms are still children themselves.  Their parents (if they're still together, otherwise, step parents) are stuck with the responsibility of raising yet another child, while mom-child goes out and gets pregnant again because, well, who's going to stop her?

This show grates on my nerves because it doesn't have to be this way.  Can you tell?  ;-)

Thanks for sharing your story @b2H. I read a really great book a while ago called “Promises I can keep: why poor women choose motherhood before marriage”, it was fascinating. 

Also, this subset of teens also have parents who consent to let them be on a reality tv show, it seems we’ve stacked the deck with bad decision, after bad decision. 

I also ask myself “why are they having it?” But then they wouldn’t be on the show would they?

[Ijustwantsomechips]

I think Laura and her family annoy me the most because they were so clueless. I have no problem with religion or spirituality. I’m Christian and believe in the Bible as the word of God.  But because I have an awesome pastor, I know that God knows I live in the real world, not the spiritual one.  All the religious belief and training in the world won’t stop teens from having sex necessarily. Some will be trained up in faith and not stray, but others will.  You have to be prepared for both because you cannot keep your daughters in a bubble. Notice how he made no mention of sheltering the son...people like him are part if the problem.  And when exactly does he think would be a good time to discuss sex with Anna if she’s already 15 and dating?  Like seriously, you don’t think your 15 year old daughter and her boyfriend have thought about sex? 

Then again, they’re probably some of the main people who vote against sex ed so they’re getting there comeuppins.  It’s no wonder she’s a dunderhead who wound up pregnant. Her parents are idiots with their heads in the sand.  And yes Mr. and Mrs. Biblerhumper, things like “that” do happen to people “like you”.  What sanctimonious jackasses they are.  

[Chalby]

On 9/11/2018 at 11:58 AM, Mrs. Hanson said:

 Once (and only once) my older one (who is THE most mellow dude, ever) got a little lippy. He was 5 or 6?  I warned him once, he did it again, and then I followed through on the threat:  No bedding on the bed that night, only a bare mattress.  He lived.  And the lipping off stopped.  And he had to make the bed the next day when I gave him his bedding back.

Your mention of bedding brought to mind something I did with 2 of my boys. I have a rule - no food in the bedroom. Yet 2 of my kids kept sneaking dishes of food into their rooms, then forgetting about the dishes (leaving me to find the mess as I root around their rooms looking for my CDs that they shouldn't be borrowing.) I had warned them several times of what the consequence will be. Well, you should have heard my first born hollering at 11 at night after crawling into bed with all the food I had scraped off his dishes into his bed. He never brought food into his room again. My youngest clearly forgot all about this incident, so he hollered equally as loud when he experienced the food-in-bed experience. Once again problem solved. Now that they are grown men, they laugh and shake their heads as they tell their friends and co-workers about their crazy mom.

[Chalby]

On 10/8/2018 at 1:28 PM, b2H said:

Are the girls really that clueless?

Well, let's look at their situations.  Most of them come from moms who went through the same scenario at the same age.  Some are third generation with this nonsense. 

When I worked for the Ministry of Children, my eyes were opened to a different breed of mothers/ families. These were the ones who view welfare/ social assistance as a permanent career/ 'salary' (lol). They know all the angles, and how much they are entitled to and what they need to do to get more $$. Often the 'dad' would disappear, or just not marry (so they could claim separately) which meant the moms received even better benefits/ health insurance. As well the Ministry (on mother's behalf) would do the legwork in tracking down a deadbeat dad to ensure child support was paid. (And I'd have moms complaining to me it was taking too long to get their exes in court. Really? This should be their responsibility.)  Often these families are 2nd and 3 generation, and one extended family was heading towards 4th generation, which meant they were there for the conception of social assistance/ welfare. They don't view this as a temporary helping hand, and they often refer to their cheques as their paydays. "Mrs. C, I haven't received my pay cheque!"  WTF? Okay, my last beef - the more kids these generational welfare families pop out, the bigger the benefits and the mothers are well trained and clever enough to come into my office, with 3 "Sale" Flyers/ Ads knowing (before I did) that the Ministry will purchase for them, the lowest priced item - be it crib, stroller, swing, Christmas gifts etc.

[Mrs. Hanson]

54 minutes ago, Chalby said:

Your mention of bedding brought to mind something I did with 2 of my boys. I have a rule - no food in the bedroom. Yet 2 of my kids kept sneaking dishes of food into their rooms, then forgetting about the dishes (leaving me to find the mess as I root around their rooms looking for my CDs that they shouldn't be borrowing.) I had warned them several times of what the consequence will be. Well, you should have heard my first born hollering at 11 at night after crawling into bed with all the food I had scraped off his dishes into his bed. He never brought food into his room again. My youngest clearly forgot all about this incident, so he hollered equally as loud when he experienced the food-in-bed experience. Once again problem solved. Now that they are grown men, they laugh and shake their heads as they tell their friends and co-workers about their crazy mom.

Let's have coffee, I think we are BFF's.  :)  

 

37 minutes ago, Chalby said:

As well the Ministry (on mother's behalf) would do the legwork in tracking down a deadbeat dad to ensure child support was paid. (And I'd have moms complaining to me it was taking too long to get their exes in court. Really? This should be their responsibility.) 

Reminds me of when I was an older teen/early 20's young woman working as a nurse's aid while in college.  The majority of girls were my age and had at least one kid.  Their angle?  List "Unknown" as the father so Health and Human Services won't try to track down Daddy for support.  So.....someday your child will see his/her birth certificate and see "Unknown" when you really DID know - you just wanted more benefits in less time.

[Lynne]

I just saw photo of the Barrens 3 kids on air when they were little, (Laura & Anna & little boy,) all blond haired cuties, but does anyoneknow why the boy isn't filmed? They show the whole family including Tyler (Boy who is with Laura)@ dinner table but no little brother! I'm hoping the parents just didn't want him filmed and that is only explanation !!!!

[Ijustwantsomechips]

He’s away at college. They showed him about 2 weeks ago.  

[HeHe]

Yeah, he is older, not younger. They also referenced him last episode during Laura's birthday dinner when her father said something along the lines of them now having 2 kids 18+ years old. 

[Pepper Mostly]

On 10/8/2018 at 7:32 PM, Scarlett45 said:

I read a really great book a while ago called “Promises I can keep: why poor women choose motherhood before marriage”, it was fascinating. 

I read that book too, and it really was fascinating and forced me to reevaluate some preconceived notions!

[Scarlett45]

11 minutes ago, Pepper Mostly said:

I read that book too, and it really was fascinating and forced me to reevaluate some preconceived notions!

I also read her book “$2 a day” and I WANT to read her newest “fatherhood in the inner city”, but it’s not at the library yet. She’s a good writer, I may buy it. https://g.co/kgs/nBv6mm

[Pepper Mostly]

$2 a Day is on my Amazon wish list, I didn't know about the new one! Thanks1

Another great read is "Random Family" by Adrian Nicole LeBlanc. A real eye opener.

[lovesnark]

I was looking around to try to figure out when Jessica told Max he couldn't be at her house and found an article that says they recently broke up. Apparently, their grand plan of living together lasted about 2 months before Chloe moved back home.

And, McKayla just posted a video showing her $675 lip injections. Good to know her priorities are on point! She says she's going to school, didn't say where. It must be nice to have two kids, free childcare, free housing, free food, free everything so you can spend your TV income on tattoos and cosmetic procedures.

I need to wash the windows and I'm procrastinating, so I took  one for the team and watched one of her videos. I'm mad at myself for giving her a view😂

[Guest]

2 hours ago, lovesnark said:

so I took  one for the team and watched one of her videos.

HA! I watched one yesterday, too (for about 30 seconds, including skipping around). She had a really nice handbag (one over $300!) and one I'd consider buying if she wasn't the one who had it. I also noticed she had the comments turned off. Gosh, can't imagine why. 

[lovesnark]

1 hour ago, Giant Misfit said:

HA! I watched one yesterday, too (for about 30 seconds, including skipping around). She had a really nice handbag (one over $300!) and one I'd consider buying if she wasn't the one who had it. I also noticed she had the comments turned off. Gosh, can't imagine why. 

I'm glad I wasn't the only one😂 The way she rambles on and on and on and plays with her hair, it's painful to watch. But, that's a good deterrent to keep from giving her views.

[Dmarie019]

wow i just looked up her instagram and holy crap her kids are like twins. No patternity dispute needed there. I'm not sure I've ever seen two kids, one a boy and one a girl that looked so similar.  Even opposite sex twins don't look as similar as that! 

[druzy]

[lovesnark]

1 hour ago, druzy said:

She says she has PTSD??? What the ever loving fuck? Grandpa must have missed a text ordering him to bring her a glass of water or something and now she's scarred for life.

I could hear her whining while I read the article. School is hard! I don't have time to make stupid videos anymore! I might have to get a job! Welcome to life, you spoiled brat. 

I predict her next video will be her droning on about she was forced to hire a family law attorney because she needs child support. And, how unfair it is that Caelen has actual legal rights to his children so she can't demand child support and deny any visitation. It's not fair! Waaaaaah!

[BravoAddict72]

She really needs to suck it up. Welcome to the real world buttercup. People raise kids, and go to school and/or work with way less help than she has. Who drops out of school to make videos? She makes me so mad! Her grandparents have created a monster. I predict she will try to get back with Caelen so she has someone to pay for everything again. I hope he is too smart for that.

[Guest]

7 hours ago, druzy said:

This trick. Just weeks ago, she posted a YT video showing off her lip injections. (Being kind here, the least she would pay is in the $500 range.) And, as I mentioned above, she also showed off some handbag in another video that cost over $300. She's not broke. But she is a known liar.

This is nothing but a sympathy ploy.

ETA: I think there's some YT clause where these "influencers" have to post at least one video claiming they have "anxiety" and "depression." She's following a script for clicks.

[lovesnark]

1 hour ago, Giant Misfit said:

This trick. Just weeks ago, she posted a YT video showing off her lip injections. (Being kind here, the least she would pay is in the $500 range.) And, as I mentioned above, she also showed off some handbag in another video that cost over $300. She's not broke. But she is a known liar.

This is nothing but a sympathy ploy.

ETA: I think there's some YT clause where these "influencers" have to post at least one video claiming they have "anxiety" and "depression." She's following a script for clicks.

I watched the video and she spent $675 on lip injections. She thought she was going to get a deal but paid full price. She also said she was getting another tattoo the week after she fucked up her lips. I SO want to see her having to pay living expenses and for childcare. 

[druzy]

[Auntie Anxiety]

McKayla starts a GoFundMe lip injection campaign in 3....2.....1

[RoxiP]

Honestly the video with Chloe showing her apartment (which looks so much like my daughter's apartment last year - typical off-campus apartment!) - she looked better than I have ever seen her.

[Kdawg82]

It's hilarious that "withholding the grandchild(ren)" is such a threat. My parents have issues and when my mother started disrupting my marital life with her b.s. again, my family became estranged so we all wouldn't be exposed to the poison . Mind you I am happily married to my spouse and children's father for a solid decade. Anything good in my life angers my mother to where she has to try spoiling it. So, we reconciled and then my son was born. She started again with her poisonous garbage and i threatened she would lose years of my son's life now if she didn't stop it. She remains utterly UNPHASED RE: my children.

To the teen mothers using kids as leverage- BE HAPPY AS A PIG IN SH** THAT SOMEONE WANTS ANYTHING TO DO WITH YOUR CHILDREN!! At least use the love they feel to your advantage!!! They're extra helping hands. They're extra hugs and kisses for the kids!

Soon the kids will grow up and not be so cute and won't have a bond with the grandkids and you'll wonder why you did that. 

As the saying goes "when you ignore me, you're teaching me how to live without you."

[FairyDusted]

I'm not surprised about Makayla. I'd be depressed too if I was raising 2 children from a  bunk bed in my grandparents house. PTSD though???? She is very immature and hasn't had good examples of parenting. Shelly may well be a pain in the ass but I bet if MK worked with her she could pull it together.

These chicks getting tats and injections before diapers really floor me. Even if she does videos how much cash do you think she will actually make? Cuz dang, I heard YT gets a cut before you even see it. I just can't see any of these girls being interesting enough to make a decent income.

[IvySpice]

McKayla's lip injections are super asymmetrical and look like ass. You get what you pay for.

[HighHopes]

On 9/18/2019 at 2:48 PM, Giant Misfit said:

HA! I watched one yesterday, too (for about 30 seconds, including skipping around). She had a really nice handbag (one over $300!) and one I'd consider buying if she wasn't the one who had it. I also noticed she had the comments turned off. Gosh, can't imagine why. 

I believe YouTube turns off comments on any video that includes children now. So if either of her children were in the video at all comments are automatically disabled. So not an active choice on her part. 

On 10/2/2019 at 7:56 AM, lovesnark said:

She says she has PTSD??? What the ever loving fuck? Grandpa must have missed a text ordering him to bring her a glass of water or something and now she's scarred for life.

Growing up with a parent (or parents) who are addicted or living in a home where physical/mental/emotional abuse happens can have a nasty affect on children when they grow up if it's not dealt with. Since we know McKayla's mom had addiction issues, I am guessing McKayla's early years before she went to live with her grandparents weren't the best.  Maybe she doesn't have PTSD, but she probably has some form on inner trauma that she hasn't dealt with that is causing her issues as she becomes an adult. She needs therapy and help. She has been coddled by her grandparents for sure and her behaviour also comes from that but it's not just that. She has no idea what proper parent/child relationships are like because she never experienced one and she needs some classes and therapy so she can be a better parent (and person) in the future. 

[lovesnark]

3 hours ago, HighHopes said:

I believe YouTube turns off comments on any video that includes children now. So if either of her children were in the video at all comments are automatically disabled. So not an active choice on her part. 

I watched a video one of the other girls made and the baby was in the video. The comments weren't disabled. McKayla doesn't want to answer any questions or to hear what others have to say unless they're praising her and bashing Caelen. 

[Guest]

Yeah, her kids were nowhere to be found in that video I saw with her showing off her $300+-dollar handbag. The comments were turned off because McKayla can't deal with anyone not sharing the same high opinion she has of herself. 

[IvySpice]

Tyra says she's going to go to college two hours away from home in order to cheer. She'll be away, living at college 3.5 days out of every week.

Even assuming that this is workable, I am NOT on board with all the commenters saying, "Follow your dreams, mama! You don't have to give them up just because you had a baby!"

WTF? If you have to move away half of each week in order to make money for your kid, or in order to get a much better education than you could get living at home, great. Do what you need to do. But she's going away to this college specifically to cheer -- that is, to spend 10+ hours a week on a silly hobby that has no connection to her education and that has no potential financial upside in the future (unlike, say, DI football). Putting additional strain on her fragile young family for a HOBBY, even if it was her "dream," is the kind of nonsense responsible parents put aside.

 

[Guest]

Who's "Alex?" And why is she talking about him and her child as her "family?" Forget the fact that she's. like, a 17-year old child, but where did she find some other child-moron who wants to play "family" with her? 

I guess we'll only have to look forward to Matthew impregnating Hailey 2 next year. 

[lovesnark]

23 minutes ago, Giant Misfit said:

Who's "Alex?" And why is she talking about him and her child as her "family?" Forget the fact that she's. like, a 17-year old child, but where did she find some other child-moron who wants to play "family" with her? 

I guess we'll only have to look forward to Matthew impregnating Hailey 2 next year. 

Alex is her boyfriend, Layla's dad.

[HighHopes]

1 hour ago, IvySpice said:

Tyra says she's going to go to college two hours away from home in order to cheer. She'll be away, living at college 3.5 days out of every week.

Even assuming that this is workable, I am NOT on board with all the commenters saying, "Follow your dreams, mama! You don't have to give them up just because you had a baby!"

WTF? If you have to move away half of each week in order to make money for your kid, or in order to get a much better education than you could get living at home, great. Do what you need to do. But she's going away to this college specifically to cheer -- that is, to spend 10+ hours a week on a silly hobby that has no connection to her education and that has no potential financial upside in the future (unlike, say, DI football). Putting additional strain on her fragile young family for a HOBBY, even if it was her "dream," is the kind of nonsense responsible parents put aside.

 

If she's on scholarship that is a huge help to her - she get's an education paid for while not having to go into debt. Even if she's not on scholarship, she will be getting an education - something that should be encouraged. Why should the mom have to stay at home/work while the baby daddy gets to go to school for his hobby? Maybe cheer won't get her a high paying career, but she will be getting an education at the time time. Good for her. I really dislike the idea that the dads can go off to school and play their sport while the moms have to stay home and work and put their education/dreams/hobbies on hold. It takes two to make a baby so why should only one of them suffer? 

[Guest]

1 hour ago, lovesnark said:

Alex is her boyfriend, Layla's dad.

A fact which I totally knew...except that I swore that video was of Hailey! LOL. 

 

[Auntie Anxiety]

Tyra’s plan sounds good in theory, but very hard to carry out in reality. It will get old quickly. Good luck to her.

[Jeanne222]

I thought that expensive purse MacKayla has was a 'push gift'  she bought for herself after her last baby!

At least that's what she told her grandmother!

[Guest]

1 hour ago, Jeanne222 said:

I thought that expensive purse MacKayla has was a 'push gift'  she bought for herself after her last baby!

The one in the video is a different purse! So, MacKayla has plenty of disposable income (which she makes from her YouTube videos) making her recent claims of having to "get a job" all the more laughable. 

[IvySpice]

Quote

If she's on scholarship that is a huge help to her - she get's an education paid for while not having to go into debt. 

She's not. There aren't cheer scholarships that put much dent in the cost of going away to college. If she'd earned some kind of scholarship, she would have said so in the video.

Quote

I really dislike the idea that the dads can go off to school and play their sport while the moms have to stay home and work

Who here is promoting that idea? I'm not differentiating between genders; I'm differentiating between hobbies for fun (like cheer) and doing an activity that's actually earning you rewards in the present or future. If Tyra had a volleyball scholarship that was going to pay for school, or a music scholarship that could lead to a career in music, that would be a whole different calculation. But to voluntarily become a 50%-time parent (of an infant!) for the sake of your hobby is idiotic. The fact that Tyra could imagine no greater dream for herself than shouting on the sidelines of a Bumf*ck State basketball game tells us a lot about how she got where she is.

[HighHopes]

10 hours ago, IvySpice said:

She's not. There aren't cheer scholarships that put much dent in the cost of going away to college. If she'd earned some kind of scholarship, she would have said so in the video.

Who here is promoting that idea? I'm not differentiating between genders; I'm differentiating between hobbies for fun (like cheer) and doing an activity that's actually earning you rewards in the present or future. If Tyra had a volleyball scholarship that was going to pay for school, or a music scholarship that could lead to a career in music, that would be a whole different calculation. But to voluntarily become a 50%-time parent (of an infant!) for the sake of your hobby is idiotic. The fact that Tyra could imagine no greater dream for herself than shouting on the sidelines of a Bumf*ck State basketball game tells us a lot about how she got where she is.

By saying "DI Football" you implied which sport would "be worth it". Only men will play DI Football - you could have chosen volleyball, so whether intended to or not, the implication was there. She's not going away for a hobby, she's going away for school where she can also cheer. She's still getting an education while cheering, again, something that I do not have an issue with. If she's made the appropriate arrangements for childcare and had a discussion with her family first, why does it matter? In the long run, this will benefit her. 

She could be away 50% of the time for work or 50% of the time for school. Either way she will be away from her child. Again, when the father (general here) goes off to work after the baby is born, there's no criticism about how he is becoming a part time parent. She is imaging a greater dream for her and her daughter - she's going to school. She's not moving away to a smaller city to cheer for a random team. She is going to school and happens to be able to cheer at the same time.

[RoxiP]

There are careers in cheer.  In Texas there are huge cheering organizations and gyms and people pay big bucks to send their kids.  If Tyra is going to try and improve herself by going to college then I think that is great.  Sure cheerleading seems silly but if she gets an education at the same time it bodes well for her future in the long run, and the future of her daughter.

Goodness knows between her mother, her aunt, her sister, her cousin, him and his grandmother (not throwing his mother in there because quite honestly I think she's the idiot that the village lost), she has a huge support system.

If she joined the military she would be away a lot more than 3.5 days a week - women do it all the time in order to make a better future.  Kudos to her for looking beyond the grim reality that seemed to be her family history of teen pregnancy and poverty.

Edited October 15, 2019 by RoxiP

[Jeanne222]

11 hours ago, Giant Misfit said:

The one in the video is a different purse! So, MacKayla has plenty of disposable income (which she makes from her YouTube videos) making her recent claims of having to "get a job" all the more laughable. 

I didn't realize you could make money from YouTube videos!!!  How does that work?

I went over and watched the one about no period!  Lots of views but no comments!  She must not want to read negative comments!

[IvySpice]

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If she joined the military she would be away a lot more than 3.5 days a week - women do it all the time in order to make a better future. 

I'd be HER cheerleader if she were doing that. Serving your country and earning the lifetime of economic and educational benefits that come with it has zilch in common with Tyra's choice here.

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She's still getting an education while cheering

But she's only leaving home because of cheer. I'm all for education. She could get the education part while still living with her child and parenting. I think it's a crappy reason to leave your kid.

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Only men will play DI Football - you could have chosen volleyball

I see where you're coming from, but in fact I mentioned football because that sport comes with the biggest (if long-shot) potential financial upside through the NFL, and volleyball doesn't. Taking your shot at the NFL benefits the whole family, not just the athlete's own idea of fun.

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There are careers in cheer.  In Texas there are huge cheering organizations and gyms and people pay big bucks to send their kids. 

If she had these aspirations and believed this choice gets her closer to them, seems like she'd mention it in a 12-minute video justifying her choice. We're doing a better job than she is coming up with reasons why this is the right path for the parent of an infant.

[Auntie Anxiety]

It’s silly to debate whatever decision Tyra makes wrt leaving the baby for cheering or for anything else. It’s not going to happen. For the first few weeks, perhaps things will run smoothly. After that, it will go downhill. Not exactly sure when she plans to shoehorn actual studying into her schedule, but the demands on her time will be too great.

Tyra can get an education at any point in her life. She’s only 18. I know I’m a dinosaur, but how about staying close to the baby who didn’t ask to be born and put whatever hopes and dreams Tyra had on the back burner? Yeah, there are plenty of sacrifices you have to make when you become a parent and this is one of them.